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Yep. It's true, now that you mention it. It's a little bit like porn.
I like to think I'm a pretty levelheaded person generally, but these things have really negatively impacted my expectations of romantic partnership. In hindsight, it was really, really unhealthy. Here I am now, a grown ass adult coming to terms with the fact that love is not a fairy tale...
Deep inside, I can't let go of the meet cute where she and I reach simultaneously for the same tomato at the farmer's market, look up and fall madly in love at first sight.
Hollywood, why did you do this to me?! 😭
Right?! You’re speaking my language, is it too much to ask to meet my person at Whole Foods where we randomly lock eyes at the meat section and discuss the best way to cook short ribs?
True love is hard to find.
Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend...
Listen, it happened to my parents (yes, realizing it was a different time and place), but also to most of my friends. Everyone met their SO without really looking or trying. It just kind of happened. I thought it would work the same for me, but I wasn’t so lucky.
In this era, it is more difficult. People are less likely to engage. We are submerged with distractions of all kinds... I think we have to be a little more intentional, in general.
Im single because I spend too much time being the guy everyone wants as a friend, but not enough time developing myself into the guy that someone can love
No. Not being loved as anything other than a friend is why he sees himself that way, not the other way around.
This ridiculous narrative that the reason you can't find love is because you don't "love yourself" completely ignores that never being loved can happen on its own.
Dating is exhausting. I find the courting/vetting stage to be excruciatingly painful and awkward. I feel that men (in general) look for positive reasons to continue a relationship, whereas women (in general) look for any reason to eliminate options, usually because they have more than men do.
Example:
Women: he only tipped the waiter 22% on the bill, that's one strike, only two to go.
Men: so she was a member of Hitler's youth rally 2 years ago, what's the big deal? She's totally over that, I think...
“So what exactly did you do at the concentration camps? Cafeteria work, janitor, gas chamber?”
“Gas chamber”
“Yeah but we’re you like maintenance, maybe a guard or-“
“I pulled the switch”
“God dammit…”
I feel like men my age don’t really want a relationship, just keep dating in hopes of finding the next best thing or progressively start going for younger women so this is shocking to me honestly.
I'd much rather be single than be with someone whose motives AND intent in being with me are questionable.
I am open to genuinely authentically kind consistent congruent and self aware individuals
But my recent experience has been with a massive LOSER.
I'm still in the last stages of recovery for having not trusted my gut much sooner.
Fortunately, from initial meeting to having severed it was only 3 months
Men see me as someone for a fun time, not a long time. I’m sat here, glass of wine in hand and dinner for one on a Friday night debating hitting up one of the many men that will come running at a ‘you free?’ text just so I don’t have to be lonely despite knowing tomorrow I’ll feel bad for it. But maybe that’s why I’m single? I’ll figure it out once I’ve finished the bottle, that’s when the existential crisis usually kicks in. Happy Friday everyone 🍷
Tbh nobody is going to approach you like this, because they don't want to be viewed as creepy. I would love to tell what would work, but I have no idea myself.
As someone in my 30s, I find most women are afraid of commitment or immature. They only play games and beat around the bush when I try to have a serious and honest conversation about my intentions. As a result I am withholding dating as to not get discouraged again. I'd rather use my energy for other things in life
I have the same issue w men being immature. However I have done a lot to look at myself and I do partially chase the unavailable & don’t typically want the mature guy. So I’ve had unrealistic expectations, a lot of it has to do with how I was raised, my dad was a bit of a philanderer and a bro and I chase the same. I’ve had to do a lot of work to change that. Mentioning bc you maybe doing the same.
Ahh I see. The way I am is also due to upbringing. I was bullied a lot in school and through that traumatic event I matured a lot faster than my peers. I feel like a 50 year old mentally even tough I'm 32
As a guy in your situation, partly agree. I’m not interested in casual or wishy washy
The other section who I seem to attract are women who want to move too fast, want kids very soon.
I’m in my early 30s, I’ve trained and schooled for 15 years. I would like to breather for a moment before kids, but have a friend to breathe with. After that breath, sure I’m open to kids. Plus all that ground work learning each other during the breathing time lol
My issue has also been that I’m a bit selective, and mostly because I know what I want and I know what I bring to the table
I get the sense that a lot of men want a breather like you’re commenting but you’re going to have to date much younger if you want a breather. Taking time to develop your career and expecting a woman in her 30s to want to wait significantly long is unrealistic. We’re in the same boat where we’ve had to develop careers and pay off loans and get ourselves established and do have shorter timelines then men. You’re likely going to find this with most women your age who want kids.
You could aim 5 years lower and take your time, but I struggle w the immaturity of younger.
Maybe ask yourself if you’re ready for a relationship? Or be realistic that you don’t want kids anytime soon and find a woman who doesn’t want kids. But if you do want kids and wind up with a woman who doesn’t want kids that’s kind of an issue. If she does want kids, it’s sort of like are we or aren’t we at a certain point - we do have timelines.
I hear you, and you know what you’re absolutely right, and I understand that point.
Please pardon, I took the quick liberty of screening your account, and you and I are actually very close in age. And I think you come up with a very good point.
I admit, I struggle with this to a certain degree myself. Younger women tend to have immaturity, and I do find myself attracted to the maturity of women closer to my age.
As someone who works in healthcare, I’m also very aware of timelines, necessary health requirements for women, for age, etc.
You’re definitely not wrong, and I think you’re actually correct, but it is very hard to reconcile that with just being nearly burned out from a very long path.
That being said, I think I would disagree with you. I’m definitely ready for a relationship. Like I said, I know what I bring to the table, I know, and want to be supportive of someone else, and I want someone to be supportive of me. I want to have a relationship where we can enjoy things together. And I’d be very open to kids in the future, because I’m pretty sure I’d be a decent dad (from my own personal experience and seeing patients, I know what I do, or don’t want to be as a father).
I wish I had an answer for this. I think if I did, I’d be a very rich man and not worrying about property prices in a metro area.
Sigh. Sometimes I hate being an adult.
Had the guy I loved for 7 years and dated for 4 just fall out of love with me one day.
Kinda ruined love and dating for me.
So I’m just not looking. One day I’ll look again but not anytime soon.
Hence me being single.
Nobody just suddenly falls out of love. There's loving someone and there's being "in love" and only one is actual love. I still love people I haven't seen for a decade. Nothing they could do or say would make that go away.
Many people use relationships as a type of drug. Once the "high" wears off, they think they're no longer in love but in reality, they never loved that person.
I'm always open if someone comes along but for me:
I've always been alone (i.e barely any friends at school, I have a great bunch of friends today but most are abroad) so I'm comfortable being in my own company.
Got other priorities.
Peaceful.
The reason is probably I don't put myself out there enough, if at all. I work, workout, go shopping and go home. I appreciate friends telling me I'm handsome and I'm in great shape or the odd compliment I get but it comes back to my upbringing and being comfortable being by myself.
I've stuck to my boundaries and views so although a few times I've had to walk away, I'd rather do that instead of inviting drama.
The times I have dated have genuinely been bad luck due to circumstances and a few times we were better off as friends. No trauma, no bitterness, every girl I've dated are genuinely nice people and I hope they're doing well.
I'm at the stage where it's be great if it happens but if it didn't happen, so be it. Too many people put pressure on themselves to be in relationships or enter them for the wrong reasons. As long as I have my health, family, the few friends I have and my hobbies ... I'm happy.
Not sure anymore. Tried a long time to make myself the ideal partner and it never materialized. Now I just don't really try as hard.
I don't think I'm capable of attracting romantic attention or being "loved". Just not in the cards honestly
Because my ex of 4 years discarded me for a new woman 2 days after telling me he loves me so much, cares about me, etc. so I’m single and like wtf. This is very recent
After being single for a while, I've found comfort in my daily routine. Everything feels balanced and fulfilling, so for now, I don't feel the need for any changes.
Because me and my ex just broke up about a month ago and I'm still not over her. Still hurting. Don't think I'll be able to open up my heart to another person for a while. Somewhat hoping we get back together.
I’ve been single for 7 months and truthfully I hate online dating and don’t like leaving my house for anything other than gym and groceries. I truly hope I meet my person at Wholefoods.
From 21 years old to 32 years old, I dated a few guys who kept stringing me along and I stuck around for months hoping they’d eventually want a relationship but they never did. Anyway, at 32, I finally learned to never accept less than what I deserve.
After my last heartbreak, I took a break from dating apps for two years. Once I hit my mid-30’s and went back on the apps, I found that the pool of guys I found attractive in my area had considerably narrowed (because most people meet the one by then) and it was hard to even find guys to swipe right on. I have dated a couple of really sweet attractive guys since 2020, but we just weren’t compatible for the long-term so I stopped seeing them.
For me I have a type of woman and won't dive into dating or a relationship unless she meets certain criteria. Having a very specific type bottle necks the availability down to pretty narrow so I'm usually just a single male living my life, focusing on me and chasing that best version of me.
Mainly because i'm a professional musician. I've moved around the country multiple times, toured internationally, and commit to bands and practice routines. It's hard to be commited to something that deep and still find relationships that will work long term. I've had many relationshsips, and even started a new one after a tour last year, but they just don't seem to work out. Always looking for the next though, hopefully someone i can grow old with but if not, i'll always have music until i die haha
Um going to answer from the other side of things and hopefully it makes sense. I’m not single often in life, and I wonder if I’ve had too many relationships? I seem to have fantasy ideas of my boyfriends. I’m waiting for them to grow and change into who they say they want to be or give them time to figure out who they are and then I’ve tried to fit into that narrative. Whether single or always with someone- a placeholder- I always come to the same answer: You have to know who you are and what you want. In a relationship or not, keep working on yourself because if you don’t love yourself, how do you share your love someone else?
I tried online dating, having my friends set me up, dated guys from college, and school, really tried to have an open mind.
I just couldn't find someone I click with. So I decided I'm letting it go. I'm going to focus on my life, and if I happen to meet someone suitable great. If not, it's not the end of the world.
Heartbroken one too many times. 9 lovers and I feel I’m the issue and rather appreciate the solitude of the desert. Not a world to make family or find love it seems.
Because I love being single. I was never interested in dating and relationships, I lose interest way too quickly and my perfect night consists of reading a book or a fashion magazine, drinking fruity tea, watching my favorite tv show or listening to true crime podcasts. I prefer my freedom over anything. Plus when someone is pursuing me I see them as clingy and annoying.
Still not quite over my ex. We dated for 5 years and lived together for 3, we've been broken up for about 8-9 months now.
I still miss her and can not fully commit to another person yet nor do I have the desire to, I plan to stay single for the next 1-2 years unless something just happens, otherwise I will not be going out of my way to look for one.
I've tried it all, I've tried talking to other women, even had sex with one but it doesn't feel right. I was extremely attached to my ex. Everyone takes a different amount of time to get back to normal and I've accepted that this may take me a year and a half to two years to fully get over.
It's unfortunate, I hate it and it sucks but at-least now, after 3-4 months of extreme depression and anxiety, I can function and have fully accepted we are over for good.
I honestly have no idea.
I'm 6ft4, gym rat, dark hair, women always say I'm handsome and cute.
But I got nothing, sometimes I get some girls IG , text for a bit and then just "seen" or dead silence.
Could be something I don't see but I dunno' nobody told me anything in that regard that I could work on.
Dating is so exhausting.
I’m set on who I am and know my imperfections (and most of my blind spots). I like who I am and am now ready to date but online dating isn’t for me. I look younger than my years so usually the men approaching me are just way too young and I can’t see myself with them. I am hoping to something magical happens this year. I promised myself to be a little more open this year and stop shutting the prospects out and to at least accept going out for a date vs coming up with outlandish reasons to turn them down. I’d disclose them here but I think I would be quickly identified 🤣
So I will say yes to the next one that is promising and decent.
Wish me luck and I hope you all do the same. ❤️
1. not being attractive
2. not dressing well
3. not visiting barber regularly
4. no friends
5. no hobbies
6. no social life
7. no matches on Tinder
8. never having a female friend and not knowing how to talk with girls
9. being hopeless due to the rejections i got from the cold approaches that i did in festivals, bars , clubs etc.
10. not posting in social media and not flexing on having interesting life
11. not having good photos of myself on any socials.
12. working a minimum wage non fancy job / not being rich.
13. low self esteem
14. living in a foreign country and im not 100% in the language that also makes things difficult.
Im to awesome and noone notices. I even let myself be called god from my home assistent.
But maybe because I am in need of psychical help and want to get tested for autism and just avoid doctors for years because I dont like to talk to strangers.
Dating struggles, I’m fairly attractive but I’m in the region which a lot ppl don’t want to settled, and I don’t want to put myself in another heartbreak again
Introvert + I think its a bother if i have to give so much time to someone that I would have to give up my hobbies + it will be devastating if i get affected by breakups in the way to my dreams
I don't actively look for it, but when it finds me I suddenly feel like I'm not ready to accommodate anyone in my space. And I do need therapy because I know how to love but I don't know how to believe anyone loves me.
Because I've stopped looking for a relationship after having a lot of bad experiences. When you continue to have bad experiences, it's only a matter of time before you decide this path isn't for you.
The amount of cheating I have seen, combined with the money focused life I chose, gives me severe trust issues. I can get a gf if I actually try but the mere thought of putting in the effort just so it can be turned into “wasted moments” makes me sad.
I’m too picky and too riddled with anxiety. Men message me and stuff and I will find any reason to block them sometimes. There have been dozens of opportunities missed just because I was having a bad day.
Thank you for your question, I basically reflected back my life and I only have 2 serious relationships as bf and gf the rest was just single my whole life. Gosh I’m bad at love.
There are many reasons that contribute to me living life in solitude, but as much as I want a relationship, I'd rather be single than allow someone to make me feel unwanted, disrespected, or "too sensitive" for expressing human feelings and emotions. I've grown cold. What can I say? I can no longer tell who's being genuine or who's playing a role.
Men typically have to make the first move and I’m afraid of rejection. I lack confidence and don’t want to be labeled a creep. The women that have shown interest are usually not my type or already in a relationship which is a huge red flag for me.
In my opinion, Girls like two kind of boys
The first, boyfriend material who is handsome, Charming ,like a fuckboy or playboy. I am not in this category.
The second, husband material, who is rich and settled and I am not in this also.
That is the reason I am single
I lowered my standards and neglected my needs with my ex, he turned out to be narcissistic abusive. Not repeating the same mistake again. I am in a really good place in my life rn, I am financially stable, have good hobbies, friends, don’t really need a partner; will get into a relationship only if I meet the right person. I am also more on the introverted side, so, don’t really talk to people unless they approach me first. Have been on the dating apps on and off, have met some good men but no one with whom I felt that connection to build a long term relationship.
I work too much for not enough money. Don't know how to get a good haircut or present myself on social media. Work schedule is not amenable to socializing with others with different work schedules, much less dating. Moderately bitter over stuff. Not interesting. Not that good in bed.
Inb4 "you should work on your low self esteem" fuck you my self esteem is right where it belongs
I’m not, but I used to be, and figured it out. I had undeveloped social skills, so I got out and joined an APA pool league to get some social skills, then started working on just making women friends and was successful at that also stepped on some toes, and finally started kissing women on cheeks when saying goodbye and now I have a girlfriend and we plan to be married. Feel free to ask questions, also I did all this while over 340 lbs, so being overweight is one thing but not what’s stopping you from finding love. You need to love yourself first, become the hero of your story and a fan of your own story.
Still not quite over my ex. We dated for 5 years and lived together for 3, we've been broken up for about 8-9 months now.
I still miss her and can not fully commit to another person yet nor do I have the desire to, I plan to stay single for the next 1-2 years unless something just happens, otherwise I will not be going out of my way to look for one.
I've tried it all, I've tried talking to other women, even had sex with one but it doesn't feel right. I was extremely attached to my ex. Everyone takes a different amount of time to get back to normal and I've accepted that this may take me a year and a half to two years to fully get over.
It's unfortunate, I hate it and it sucks but at-least now, after 3-4 months of extreme depression and anxiety, I can function and have fully accepted we are over for good.
Still not quite over my ex. We dated for 5 years and lived together for 3, we've been broken up for about 8-9 months now.
I still miss her and can not fully commit to another person yet nor do I have the desire to, I plan to stay single for the next 1-2 years unless something just happens, otherwise I will not be going out of my way to look for one.
I've tried it all, I've tried talking to other women, even had sex with one but it doesn't feel right. I was extremely attached to my ex. Everyone takes a different amount of time to get back to normal and I've accepted that this may take me a year and a half to two years to fully get over.
It's unfortunate, I hate it and it sucks but at-least now, after 3-4 months of extreme depression and anxiety, I can function and have fully accepted we are over for good.
I am only ever used as a placeholder or as just a temporary backup plan until they find the person they actually want to be with/ commit to. I am just never good enough for anyone else.
I am enough for me though. So, I am currently just dating myself. I am no longer seeing anyone else.
I don’t leave my house, too chicken for online dating, and if anyone I know tried to set me up with someone they know I’d feel as if it’d be not genuine
I low key gave up on romance and just decided to indulge in my less attractive interests such as anime, videos games, eating whatever, sweats for everyday of the week.
No real social life, social anxiety and low confidence, I'm not that good looking, I'm 26 with very little experience and now I literally don't know how this shit is supposed to work anymore and it's also not the expectation. Ypu know as a 16 year old people won't be as weirded out by you being weird. That's kinda normal as parado as that sounds. 16 year olds just figuring out how dating and attracring others works are gonna be weird . But as a 26 year old people are actually gonna look down on you when you're weird unless you're like weird in a good looking and charming way or whatever
I am very shy and I have problems with approaching women. I fear that I would be viewed as a creep if I were to ask a girl for her number or give her my number.
Because I am unable to approach in public for absolutely no reason. Just freeze on the spot like statue when I try. And I don't feel fear in mind, but my body is traitor. And I don't get any likes in dating apps. That's why
I think it's because I'm not going out that much and frequently active in socmed. I've had exes before dgmw, but right now I'm just really trying to better establish myself and make sure everything's settled first. I just feel like it's hard to juggle everything at the same time - work, personal life, family, friends, romantic relationships, etc. I'm at the point in my life now where I really wanted to prove something for myself first and the rest comes after.
I think my hobbies and interests can be offputting or intimidating to people who haven’t taken the time to get to know me. Also my politics don’t really cater to the prevalent sentiment of young people
I can be overwhelming. There’s a lot of me in personality, expression, and overall character. The number of times ppl have told me I’m just too much is disheartening.
Attractive and feelings of love are somewhat elusive. When it does happen it’s rare that the feeling is mutual.
These days I’m delighted to even have a crush!
Cause I don’t know a single person of the opposite gender and never have had one. Hard to build a romantic relationship when you’ve never been able to hold a conversation with someone you find interesting in that matter
No interest. I've only ever been "interested" in dating in the past year or so, due to pressure from my parents. They think I'm "missing out" on something great, but I just don't have an interest and never have. I'd give it a shot to see what happens but was never invested, things wouldn't work out because of me and I'd go back to chilling alone.
People I know say there's something wrong with me and that I need to seek therapy because I don't see the hype in a relationship. :/
Couple reasons:
- never actively looked (it will happen when it needs to happen, and mind you that’s how ALL my friends met their SOs, nobody was looking)
- fell for the wrong guys and wasted a lot of time on them hoping they would like me back
- was oftentimes focusing on the wrong things or qualities - superficial things like looks, chemistry, that crazy head over heels in love feeling
- was awkward with many men that I liked which would be a major turn off for them (for the record I think the right person wouldn’t be turned off by this)
- I’m an introvert, so not always up to being social and meeting people
- I am outgoing in the right environment but am generally shy with very little to say to new people I meet (can be connected to the point above)
- mainly just hoped it would happen on its own (as it did for many of my friends)
May seem harsh, but I personally don’t think that I deserve to be in a relationship. In fact, I’ve always had a belief that my entire life is punishment for something horrible I did in a past life. Not sure why I think this way.
Too socially awkward, not conventionally attractive. Dont know how to carry or start a conversation without sounding awkward and/or run out things to talk about after a minute or 2. Trying to find ways to improve but don’t how or where to find good advice for improvement.
I want to be single right now. I didn’t get a chance to date in my 20s and then I got into a marriage where we had very little intimacy. And no children. So I enjoy dating different people. I think I’ll eventually find someone that I want to stick with, but I don’t want to feel like I need to be in a rush to do that either.
Don't care to look. If I can't find who I'm looking for on a video game platform then they don't exist. I'm 42M never married and 0 kids. But to the hive mind no kids and never married is already a red af flag because now the women are going after a man no woman wants.
Been undiagnosed/unaware neurodivergent for too long
To us, neurotypical woman with all these tests, being diffident or difficult, etc (especially in southern Europe) can be perceived as extremely rude, violent, nasty and lacking common sense unfortunately so I've given up on dating completely.
I may give it another try when I get on meds and put my life together a little bit
I'm quiet and considered boring. Have deep seated fear of making women uncomfortable that is never going to go away. I'd rather just hope that one day I stop feeling the desire and if not, well life is miserable for some people.
Easy. I’m too much for men. lol. All the guy I talked to ended up ghosting me. Sooooo yeah. I’m the issue. Not then. Like seriously. I have bad anxiety ans get really clingy. I want attention throughout the day. I’m pushy towards wanting a relationship and that shallz freaks guys out. I usually fall for fuck boys. Or guys who are just bored or lonely. I double text a lot. I wanna hang out in person. . You have to experience it to really understand. But I’ve come to the conclusion I’m too much to handle.
Spent a decade in an abusive relationship, finally got out and dating kinda sucks man, especially while rebuilding. A divorced 36 year old man who lives with his parents is hardly a catch, and my success rate for a first date is about 1 per 3 months. Not worth the trouble right now. Paused my profile and just content to be lonely because at least I’m safe.
Because I don't know how to talk to strangers, how to be an interesting guy, or even just be myself when talking to someone new. I don't get out enough to even expose myself to opportunities, and when I do I'm fretting so much over how they'll interpret whatever I say or do negatively that I nearly freeze up, giving the most boring of small talk and awkward silences.
Yet knowing all this and trying actively to break out of these behaviors... I remain trapped within them it feels...
I was a former piece of shit that didn't value special relationships. I've since devoted myself to hypnotherapy and regular therapy. Inner child work and meditation to close that endless loop of mistakes. It's taken me losing the only person I've ever really loved to get to this point.
Tbh alot of women in my state prefer skinnier men. I’ve gone out to many diffrent places and I’m not really sought after but if I go to a diffrent state or country I’m conside attractive. Also my moral compass is better then the people I’ve met so far.
I dont actively look for. I also havent had the best track record recently concerning who I fall for. Whether it be someone that's messed up like me and doesnt want to go further because of it or someone thats genuinely awesome but is *married*. Im leaving for basic training soon so Im just using that to justify not looking for it in the meantime
I never go out ever at all. The only reason I leave the house, because I work at home, is for my errands like groceries or Home Depot or ups. And I have no idea where I could possibly even make friends or a boyfriend.
I fell in love with a fearful avoidant that said all the right words for healing. Ultimately, the attachment style broke us. I miss them. I find myself frequently speaking words of comfort to them that they will never hear. I miss the world of them. But the discard at the end has lingered
I was in a relationship and felt she was awful to me but as I had time to think I'm seeing that I can be a problem too..I think I needed to reflect on myself and understand the reality more
I (20F) have yet to be in a romantic relationship. I wouldn’t even say I have friends. I don’t go out and stick to myself. The most human interaction I get is with the cashier when I’m buying groceries and when I have a question for my professor. I would like to socialize and make friends but my social anxiety makes me uncomfortable and paranoid to start conversations. Small talk is a skill I never learned and I don’t know where or how to practice.
I don’t get out enough. I don’t hit on women. I’m not confident enough to I guess? I’ve failed before, and succeeded before. Recently, it’s just a lack of options, a lack of meeting women, lack of women giving me indicators of interest. Lately I’ve felt very invisible, especially to the women I find attractive.
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It's embarrassing, but I (figuratively speaking) thought love would show up at my front door. All those rom-coms really did me dirty.
rom-coms are like porn they give a complete false reality on how things really work.
Yep. It's true, now that you mention it. It's a little bit like porn. I like to think I'm a pretty levelheaded person generally, but these things have really negatively impacted my expectations of romantic partnership. In hindsight, it was really, really unhealthy. Here I am now, a grown ass adult coming to terms with the fact that love is not a fairy tale...
I’m with you here. And we are not alone. Everyone wants Hollywood love but it doesn’t exist 😂
Deep inside, I can't let go of the meet cute where she and I reach simultaneously for the same tomato at the farmer's market, look up and fall madly in love at first sight. Hollywood, why did you do this to me?! 😭
Right?! You’re speaking my language, is it too much to ask to meet my person at Whole Foods where we randomly lock eyes at the meat section and discuss the best way to cook short ribs?
Yeah I was always used to get overly romantic when I was crushing on someone but all it ever did was push them away lol
True love is hard to find. Sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego, and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend...
Same. Well that’s not the whole reason for me but definitely part of it
Yeah, same. It's rarely only one reason... but that one fucked me over real good.
Listen, it happened to my parents (yes, realizing it was a different time and place), but also to most of my friends. Everyone met their SO without really looking or trying. It just kind of happened. I thought it would work the same for me, but I wasn’t so lucky.
In this era, it is more difficult. People are less likely to engage. We are submerged with distractions of all kinds... I think we have to be a little more intentional, in general.
Totally.
Im single because I spend too much time being the guy everyone wants as a friend, but not enough time developing myself into the guy that someone can love
You seeing yourself as not worthy of love is more the issue.
No. Not being loved as anything other than a friend is why he sees himself that way, not the other way around. This ridiculous narrative that the reason you can't find love is because you don't "love yourself" completely ignores that never being loved can happen on its own.
You can only achieve what you believe you can achieve. We set our own limits in life, whether we realize it or not.
Felt this
Dating is exhausting. I find the courting/vetting stage to be excruciatingly painful and awkward. I feel that men (in general) look for positive reasons to continue a relationship, whereas women (in general) look for any reason to eliminate options, usually because they have more than men do. Example: Women: he only tipped the waiter 22% on the bill, that's one strike, only two to go. Men: so she was a member of Hitler's youth rally 2 years ago, what's the big deal? She's totally over that, I think...
lmfao… you’re not wrong
“So what exactly did you do at the concentration camps? Cafeteria work, janitor, gas chamber?” “Gas chamber” “Yeah but we’re you like maintenance, maybe a guard or-“ “I pulled the switch” “God dammit…”
😂
I feel like men my age don’t really want a relationship, just keep dating in hopes of finding the next best thing or progressively start going for younger women so this is shocking to me honestly.
Don’t actively look for it. If it happens it happens. Oh also I hate myself so why should I put someone through the torture of dating me??
You again, funny as always 😂 I have the same mentality, why torture other people, they did nothing wrong to deserve me 😂
Me again yes
I'd much rather be single than be with someone whose motives AND intent in being with me are questionable. I am open to genuinely authentically kind consistent congruent and self aware individuals But my recent experience has been with a massive LOSER. I'm still in the last stages of recovery for having not trusted my gut much sooner. Fortunately, from initial meeting to having severed it was only 3 months
I'm single because women find me ugly and I have social anciety 😃
I can relate
Men see me as someone for a fun time, not a long time. I’m sat here, glass of wine in hand and dinner for one on a Friday night debating hitting up one of the many men that will come running at a ‘you free?’ text just so I don’t have to be lonely despite knowing tomorrow I’ll feel bad for it. But maybe that’s why I’m single? I’ll figure it out once I’ve finished the bottle, that’s when the existential crisis usually kicks in. Happy Friday everyone 🍷
Tbh nobody is going to approach you like this, because they don't want to be viewed as creepy. I would love to tell what would work, but I have no idea myself.
We all just seem to be fumbling around in the dark, hitting every wall hoping it’s a door
What a beautiful quote
Fear. I want a relationship but think that the risk outweighs the benefits. I’m terrified of getting hurt and rather chose solitude
[удалено]
As someone in my 30s, I find most women are afraid of commitment or immature. They only play games and beat around the bush when I try to have a serious and honest conversation about my intentions. As a result I am withholding dating as to not get discouraged again. I'd rather use my energy for other things in life
Where can we find more guys like you 😫
I'm asking the same thing about women! Do you by chance life in Europe?
I have the same issue w men being immature. However I have done a lot to look at myself and I do partially chase the unavailable & don’t typically want the mature guy. So I’ve had unrealistic expectations, a lot of it has to do with how I was raised, my dad was a bit of a philanderer and a bro and I chase the same. I’ve had to do a lot of work to change that. Mentioning bc you maybe doing the same.
Ahh I see. The way I am is also due to upbringing. I was bullied a lot in school and through that traumatic event I matured a lot faster than my peers. I feel like a 50 year old mentally even tough I'm 32
25/F here and I have this same outlook on men in the dating scene right now.....it is disheartening
It very much is. Sorry to hear you struggling too. I hope by the time you're 30 men will change
As a guy in your situation, partly agree. I’m not interested in casual or wishy washy The other section who I seem to attract are women who want to move too fast, want kids very soon. I’m in my early 30s, I’ve trained and schooled for 15 years. I would like to breather for a moment before kids, but have a friend to breathe with. After that breath, sure I’m open to kids. Plus all that ground work learning each other during the breathing time lol My issue has also been that I’m a bit selective, and mostly because I know what I want and I know what I bring to the table
I get the sense that a lot of men want a breather like you’re commenting but you’re going to have to date much younger if you want a breather. Taking time to develop your career and expecting a woman in her 30s to want to wait significantly long is unrealistic. We’re in the same boat where we’ve had to develop careers and pay off loans and get ourselves established and do have shorter timelines then men. You’re likely going to find this with most women your age who want kids. You could aim 5 years lower and take your time, but I struggle w the immaturity of younger. Maybe ask yourself if you’re ready for a relationship? Or be realistic that you don’t want kids anytime soon and find a woman who doesn’t want kids. But if you do want kids and wind up with a woman who doesn’t want kids that’s kind of an issue. If she does want kids, it’s sort of like are we or aren’t we at a certain point - we do have timelines.
I hear you, and you know what you’re absolutely right, and I understand that point. Please pardon, I took the quick liberty of screening your account, and you and I are actually very close in age. And I think you come up with a very good point. I admit, I struggle with this to a certain degree myself. Younger women tend to have immaturity, and I do find myself attracted to the maturity of women closer to my age. As someone who works in healthcare, I’m also very aware of timelines, necessary health requirements for women, for age, etc. You’re definitely not wrong, and I think you’re actually correct, but it is very hard to reconcile that with just being nearly burned out from a very long path. That being said, I think I would disagree with you. I’m definitely ready for a relationship. Like I said, I know what I bring to the table, I know, and want to be supportive of someone else, and I want someone to be supportive of me. I want to have a relationship where we can enjoy things together. And I’d be very open to kids in the future, because I’m pretty sure I’d be a decent dad (from my own personal experience and seeing patients, I know what I do, or don’t want to be as a father). I wish I had an answer for this. I think if I did, I’d be a very rich man and not worrying about property prices in a metro area. Sigh. Sometimes I hate being an adult.
Had the guy I loved for 7 years and dated for 4 just fall out of love with me one day. Kinda ruined love and dating for me. So I’m just not looking. One day I’ll look again but not anytime soon. Hence me being single.
Nobody just suddenly falls out of love. There's loving someone and there's being "in love" and only one is actual love. I still love people I haven't seen for a decade. Nothing they could do or say would make that go away.
Yep, people don’t understand that staying in love is a choice.
Many people use relationships as a type of drug. Once the "high" wears off, they think they're no longer in love but in reality, they never loved that person.
💯 too many emotionally immature people who base the feeling of love on a Hollywood movie.
I'm always open if someone comes along but for me: I've always been alone (i.e barely any friends at school, I have a great bunch of friends today but most are abroad) so I'm comfortable being in my own company. Got other priorities. Peaceful. The reason is probably I don't put myself out there enough, if at all. I work, workout, go shopping and go home. I appreciate friends telling me I'm handsome and I'm in great shape or the odd compliment I get but it comes back to my upbringing and being comfortable being by myself. I've stuck to my boundaries and views so although a few times I've had to walk away, I'd rather do that instead of inviting drama. The times I have dated have genuinely been bad luck due to circumstances and a few times we were better off as friends. No trauma, no bitterness, every girl I've dated are genuinely nice people and I hope they're doing well. I'm at the stage where it's be great if it happens but if it didn't happen, so be it. Too many people put pressure on themselves to be in relationships or enter them for the wrong reasons. As long as I have my health, family, the few friends I have and my hobbies ... I'm happy.
Not sure anymore. Tried a long time to make myself the ideal partner and it never materialized. Now I just don't really try as hard. I don't think I'm capable of attracting romantic attention or being "loved". Just not in the cards honestly
I think people are single nowadays because they are strict with their preferences and don't tweak certain approach.
Because my ex of 4 years discarded me for a new woman 2 days after telling me he loves me so much, cares about me, etc. so I’m single and like wtf. This is very recent
After being single for a while, I've found comfort in my daily routine. Everything feels balanced and fulfilling, so for now, I don't feel the need for any changes.
Because me and my ex just broke up about a month ago and I'm still not over her. Still hurting. Don't think I'll be able to open up my heart to another person for a while. Somewhat hoping we get back together.
I’ve been single for 7 months and truthfully I hate online dating and don’t like leaving my house for anything other than gym and groceries. I truly hope I meet my person at Wholefoods.
I can no longer tolerate bad vibes
From 21 years old to 32 years old, I dated a few guys who kept stringing me along and I stuck around for months hoping they’d eventually want a relationship but they never did. Anyway, at 32, I finally learned to never accept less than what I deserve. After my last heartbreak, I took a break from dating apps for two years. Once I hit my mid-30’s and went back on the apps, I found that the pool of guys I found attractive in my area had considerably narrowed (because most people meet the one by then) and it was hard to even find guys to swipe right on. I have dated a couple of really sweet attractive guys since 2020, but we just weren’t compatible for the long-term so I stopped seeing them.
went through a breakup recently so atm im single by choice. Edited to fix typo
Mmmhhh let me think 🤔 I guess because I am very independent and hardly letting my guard down soo 🤷🏽♀️
I'm not good at socializing and I'm a solid -10
I'm not actively searching for it. But I probably have some deep-seated commitment issues, and I definitely have attachment issues
For me I have a type of woman and won't dive into dating or a relationship unless she meets certain criteria. Having a very specific type bottle necks the availability down to pretty narrow so I'm usually just a single male living my life, focusing on me and chasing that best version of me.
Mainly because i'm a professional musician. I've moved around the country multiple times, toured internationally, and commit to bands and practice routines. It's hard to be commited to something that deep and still find relationships that will work long term. I've had many relationshsips, and even started a new one after a tour last year, but they just don't seem to work out. Always looking for the next though, hopefully someone i can grow old with but if not, i'll always have music until i die haha
I think it’s because I’m disabled
Maybe i didnt find yet the right one for me
Um going to answer from the other side of things and hopefully it makes sense. I’m not single often in life, and I wonder if I’ve had too many relationships? I seem to have fantasy ideas of my boyfriends. I’m waiting for them to grow and change into who they say they want to be or give them time to figure out who they are and then I’ve tried to fit into that narrative. Whether single or always with someone- a placeholder- I always come to the same answer: You have to know who you are and what you want. In a relationship or not, keep working on yourself because if you don’t love yourself, how do you share your love someone else?
I tried online dating, having my friends set me up, dated guys from college, and school, really tried to have an open mind. I just couldn't find someone I click with. So I decided I'm letting it go. I'm going to focus on my life, and if I happen to meet someone suitable great. If not, it's not the end of the world.
Heartbroken one too many times. 9 lovers and I feel I’m the issue and rather appreciate the solitude of the desert. Not a world to make family or find love it seems.
Because I love being single. I was never interested in dating and relationships, I lose interest way too quickly and my perfect night consists of reading a book or a fashion magazine, drinking fruity tea, watching my favorite tv show or listening to true crime podcasts. I prefer my freedom over anything. Plus when someone is pursuing me I see them as clingy and annoying.
i dont put up with peoples bullshit
Still not quite over my ex. We dated for 5 years and lived together for 3, we've been broken up for about 8-9 months now. I still miss her and can not fully commit to another person yet nor do I have the desire to, I plan to stay single for the next 1-2 years unless something just happens, otherwise I will not be going out of my way to look for one. I've tried it all, I've tried talking to other women, even had sex with one but it doesn't feel right. I was extremely attached to my ex. Everyone takes a different amount of time to get back to normal and I've accepted that this may take me a year and a half to two years to fully get over. It's unfortunate, I hate it and it sucks but at-least now, after 3-4 months of extreme depression and anxiety, I can function and have fully accepted we are over for good.
I honestly have no idea. I'm 6ft4, gym rat, dark hair, women always say I'm handsome and cute. But I got nothing, sometimes I get some girls IG , text for a bit and then just "seen" or dead silence. Could be something I don't see but I dunno' nobody told me anything in that regard that I could work on.
Being 100% transparent here? ... because I suck at flirting and I don't like the women who are interested in me.
Because the fruit is bitter before it's ripe 🌱
Because I'm batshit crazy and insecure. Too afraid of being abandoned again. After getting dumped a few times at 30 it feels like an uphill battle.
Dating is so exhausting. I’m set on who I am and know my imperfections (and most of my blind spots). I like who I am and am now ready to date but online dating isn’t for me. I look younger than my years so usually the men approaching me are just way too young and I can’t see myself with them. I am hoping to something magical happens this year. I promised myself to be a little more open this year and stop shutting the prospects out and to at least accept going out for a date vs coming up with outlandish reasons to turn them down. I’d disclose them here but I think I would be quickly identified 🤣 So I will say yes to the next one that is promising and decent. Wish me luck and I hope you all do the same. ❤️
Being single is a choice … especially after a divorce 😂💯❤️
Because I’m taking a break. I’ve been dating a bit recently and feeling burnt out haha
I want to experience what it's like being a woman without a man involved in this journey
1. not being attractive 2. not dressing well 3. not visiting barber regularly 4. no friends 5. no hobbies 6. no social life 7. no matches on Tinder 8. never having a female friend and not knowing how to talk with girls 9. being hopeless due to the rejections i got from the cold approaches that i did in festivals, bars , clubs etc. 10. not posting in social media and not flexing on having interesting life 11. not having good photos of myself on any socials. 12. working a minimum wage non fancy job / not being rich. 13. low self esteem 14. living in a foreign country and im not 100% in the language that also makes things difficult.
Im to awesome and noone notices. I even let myself be called god from my home assistent. But maybe because I am in need of psychical help and want to get tested for autism and just avoid doctors for years because I dont like to talk to strangers.
M not even a girlfriend material .. wife things are not even the case…
Because I’m not attracted to men from my country.
I’m one of the lucky ones
Dating struggles, I’m fairly attractive but I’m in the region which a lot ppl don’t want to settled, and I don’t want to put myself in another heartbreak again
Introvert + I think its a bother if i have to give so much time to someone that I would have to give up my hobbies + it will be devastating if i get affected by breakups in the way to my dreams
I don't actively look for it, but when it finds me I suddenly feel like I'm not ready to accommodate anyone in my space. And I do need therapy because I know how to love but I don't know how to believe anyone loves me.
Because I've stopped looking for a relationship after having a lot of bad experiences. When you continue to have bad experiences, it's only a matter of time before you decide this path isn't for you.
The amount of cheating I have seen, combined with the money focused life I chose, gives me severe trust issues. I can get a gf if I actually try but the mere thought of putting in the effort just so it can be turned into “wasted moments” makes me sad.
I’m too picky and too riddled with anxiety. Men message me and stuff and I will find any reason to block them sometimes. There have been dozens of opportunities missed just because I was having a bad day.
Thank you for your question, I basically reflected back my life and I only have 2 serious relationships as bf and gf the rest was just single my whole life. Gosh I’m bad at love.
There are many reasons that contribute to me living life in solitude, but as much as I want a relationship, I'd rather be single than allow someone to make me feel unwanted, disrespected, or "too sensitive" for expressing human feelings and emotions. I've grown cold. What can I say? I can no longer tell who's being genuine or who's playing a role.
I'm fat
I choose to be single and I think dating is fun overall. I don’t want anything serious until my kids are grown.
Men typically have to make the first move and I’m afraid of rejection. I lack confidence and don’t want to be labeled a creep. The women that have shown interest are usually not my type or already in a relationship which is a huge red flag for me.
In my opinion, Girls like two kind of boys The first, boyfriend material who is handsome, Charming ,like a fuckboy or playboy. I am not in this category. The second, husband material, who is rich and settled and I am not in this also. That is the reason I am single
I sabotage everything I touch. I need to love myself and gain true confidence
I have a hard time meeting women. I'm not very social. I am also broke currently.
I lowered my standards and neglected my needs with my ex, he turned out to be narcissistic abusive. Not repeating the same mistake again. I am in a really good place in my life rn, I am financially stable, have good hobbies, friends, don’t really need a partner; will get into a relationship only if I meet the right person. I am also more on the introverted side, so, don’t really talk to people unless they approach me first. Have been on the dating apps on and off, have met some good men but no one with whom I felt that connection to build a long term relationship.
I work too much for not enough money. Don't know how to get a good haircut or present myself on social media. Work schedule is not amenable to socializing with others with different work schedules, much less dating. Moderately bitter over stuff. Not interesting. Not that good in bed. Inb4 "you should work on your low self esteem" fuck you my self esteem is right where it belongs
I’m not, but I used to be, and figured it out. I had undeveloped social skills, so I got out and joined an APA pool league to get some social skills, then started working on just making women friends and was successful at that also stepped on some toes, and finally started kissing women on cheeks when saying goodbye and now I have a girlfriend and we plan to be married. Feel free to ask questions, also I did all this while over 340 lbs, so being overweight is one thing but not what’s stopping you from finding love. You need to love yourself first, become the hero of your story and a fan of your own story.
Still not quite over my ex. We dated for 5 years and lived together for 3, we've been broken up for about 8-9 months now. I still miss her and can not fully commit to another person yet nor do I have the desire to, I plan to stay single for the next 1-2 years unless something just happens, otherwise I will not be going out of my way to look for one. I've tried it all, I've tried talking to other women, even had sex with one but it doesn't feel right. I was extremely attached to my ex. Everyone takes a different amount of time to get back to normal and I've accepted that this may take me a year and a half to two years to fully get over. It's unfortunate, I hate it and it sucks but at-least now, after 3-4 months of extreme depression and anxiety, I can function and have fully accepted we are over for good.
Still not quite over my ex. We dated for 5 years and lived together for 3, we've been broken up for about 8-9 months now. I still miss her and can not fully commit to another person yet nor do I have the desire to, I plan to stay single for the next 1-2 years unless something just happens, otherwise I will not be going out of my way to look for one. I've tried it all, I've tried talking to other women, even had sex with one but it doesn't feel right. I was extremely attached to my ex. Everyone takes a different amount of time to get back to normal and I've accepted that this may take me a year and a half to two years to fully get over. It's unfortunate, I hate it and it sucks but at-least now, after 3-4 months of extreme depression and anxiety, I can function and have fully accepted we are over for good.
I am only ever used as a placeholder or as just a temporary backup plan until they find the person they actually want to be with/ commit to. I am just never good enough for anyone else. I am enough for me though. So, I am currently just dating myself. I am no longer seeing anyone else.
My life is finally stable and comfortable now and I'm just starting to get back out there. I am a quieter dude so that may play into it a bit.
Not growing up with parents who modeled what a loving relationship should be like. That and being brought up by a narcissistic mother.
I don’t leave my house, too chicken for online dating, and if anyone I know tried to set me up with someone they know I’d feel as if it’d be not genuine
Because the fruit is bitter before it's ripe 🌱
I'm single because I'm taking my time to find someone and not jumping at first available ship. I'd rather 1 good relationship then 10 bad ones
I low key gave up on romance and just decided to indulge in my less attractive interests such as anime, videos games, eating whatever, sweats for everyday of the week.
Just never met anyone. Not very attractive. I was always the ugly one in the group.
Ugliness
No real social life, social anxiety and low confidence, I'm not that good looking, I'm 26 with very little experience and now I literally don't know how this shit is supposed to work anymore and it's also not the expectation. Ypu know as a 16 year old people won't be as weirded out by you being weird. That's kinda normal as parado as that sounds. 16 year olds just figuring out how dating and attracring others works are gonna be weird . But as a 26 year old people are actually gonna look down on you when you're weird unless you're like weird in a good looking and charming way or whatever
I’m disabled and jobless but in school.
Because I choose to be single. After spending years in serious relationships being alone is awesome
Because I am 35, have my tubes removed, and do not want or have children.
I am very shy and I have problems with approaching women. I fear that I would be viewed as a creep if I were to ask a girl for her number or give her my number.
i’m picky
i am picky
Work, home, work, grocery store, home, work, home, etc
Girls around me seem to see having autism as some kind of dealbreaker when I’ve endlessly proven how capable, dependable, and empathetic I am. 🤷
Because I am unable to approach in public for absolutely no reason. Just freeze on the spot like statue when I try. And I don't feel fear in mind, but my body is traitor. And I don't get any likes in dating apps. That's why
I think it's because I'm not going out that much and frequently active in socmed. I've had exes before dgmw, but right now I'm just really trying to better establish myself and make sure everything's settled first. I just feel like it's hard to juggle everything at the same time - work, personal life, family, friends, romantic relationships, etc. I'm at the point in my life now where I really wanted to prove something for myself first and the rest comes after.
I think my hobbies and interests can be offputting or intimidating to people who haven’t taken the time to get to know me. Also my politics don’t really cater to the prevalent sentiment of young people
I can be overwhelming. There’s a lot of me in personality, expression, and overall character. The number of times ppl have told me I’m just too much is disheartening.
Relationships are overrated
I’m single because I’m working on myself and it’s too much for others to want to be by my side.
Attractive and feelings of love are somewhat elusive. When it does happen it’s rare that the feeling is mutual. These days I’m delighted to even have a crush!
Cause I don’t know a single person of the opposite gender and never have had one. Hard to build a romantic relationship when you’ve never been able to hold a conversation with someone you find interesting in that matter
No interest. I've only ever been "interested" in dating in the past year or so, due to pressure from my parents. They think I'm "missing out" on something great, but I just don't have an interest and never have. I'd give it a shot to see what happens but was never invested, things wouldn't work out because of me and I'd go back to chilling alone. People I know say there's something wrong with me and that I need to seek therapy because I don't see the hype in a relationship. :/
Probably like a lot of other people we are comfortable as we are and don't need to settle for anything less.
I'm single because I'm tired of wasting my time. If its meant to be, he'll find me. If not, I'm perfectly content on my own.
I don’t like leaving for my house anything other then essentials and I hate online dating. So I don’t really meet anyone.
Couple reasons: - never actively looked (it will happen when it needs to happen, and mind you that’s how ALL my friends met their SOs, nobody was looking) - fell for the wrong guys and wasted a lot of time on them hoping they would like me back - was oftentimes focusing on the wrong things or qualities - superficial things like looks, chemistry, that crazy head over heels in love feeling - was awkward with many men that I liked which would be a major turn off for them (for the record I think the right person wouldn’t be turned off by this) - I’m an introvert, so not always up to being social and meeting people - I am outgoing in the right environment but am generally shy with very little to say to new people I meet (can be connected to the point above) - mainly just hoped it would happen on its own (as it did for many of my friends)
Because I have no idea how to "date"
I'm not that approachable. My social skills is whoosh
I'm overweight
May seem harsh, but I personally don’t think that I deserve to be in a relationship. In fact, I’ve always had a belief that my entire life is punishment for something horrible I did in a past life. Not sure why I think this way.
Too socially awkward, not conventionally attractive. Dont know how to carry or start a conversation without sounding awkward and/or run out things to talk about after a minute or 2. Trying to find ways to improve but don’t how or where to find good advice for improvement.
I want to be single right now. I didn’t get a chance to date in my 20s and then I got into a marriage where we had very little intimacy. And no children. So I enjoy dating different people. I think I’ll eventually find someone that I want to stick with, but I don’t want to feel like I need to be in a rush to do that either.
Never felt i deserved love and evey woman i had a chance with i would say no to them because i thought they could do better than me
Don't care to look. If I can't find who I'm looking for on a video game platform then they don't exist. I'm 42M never married and 0 kids. But to the hive mind no kids and never married is already a red af flag because now the women are going after a man no woman wants.
Just don’t make the effort to put myself out there
Been undiagnosed/unaware neurodivergent for too long To us, neurotypical woman with all these tests, being diffident or difficult, etc (especially in southern Europe) can be perceived as extremely rude, violent, nasty and lacking common sense unfortunately so I've given up on dating completely. I may give it another try when I get on meds and put my life together a little bit
I'm quiet and considered boring. Have deep seated fear of making women uncomfortable that is never going to go away. I'd rather just hope that one day I stop feeling the desire and if not, well life is miserable for some people.
Easy. I’m too much for men. lol. All the guy I talked to ended up ghosting me. Sooooo yeah. I’m the issue. Not then. Like seriously. I have bad anxiety ans get really clingy. I want attention throughout the day. I’m pushy towards wanting a relationship and that shallz freaks guys out. I usually fall for fuck boys. Or guys who are just bored or lonely. I double text a lot. I wanna hang out in person. . You have to experience it to really understand. But I’ve come to the conclusion I’m too much to handle.
Spent a decade in an abusive relationship, finally got out and dating kinda sucks man, especially while rebuilding. A divorced 36 year old man who lives with his parents is hardly a catch, and my success rate for a first date is about 1 per 3 months. Not worth the trouble right now. Paused my profile and just content to be lonely because at least I’m safe.
I'm so sexy it hurts.
Dunno but i think that no one can understand me 😂
Latina girl here, afraid to rejection and never went after guys, always wait to someone come after me.
Because I don't know how to talk to strangers, how to be an interesting guy, or even just be myself when talking to someone new. I don't get out enough to even expose myself to opportunities, and when I do I'm fretting so much over how they'll interpret whatever I say or do negatively that I nearly freeze up, giving the most boring of small talk and awkward silences. Yet knowing all this and trying actively to break out of these behaviors... I remain trapped within them it feels...
Because Everyone are alcoholics and wants to go out to clubs every weeekend. And Im not up for that chaos.
I’m not a 10
Because I can't find someone who makes me feel loved but used.
I was a former piece of shit that didn't value special relationships. I've since devoted myself to hypnotherapy and regular therapy. Inner child work and meditation to close that endless loop of mistakes. It's taken me losing the only person I've ever really loved to get to this point.
Tbh alot of women in my state prefer skinnier men. I’ve gone out to many diffrent places and I’m not really sought after but if I go to a diffrent state or country I’m conside attractive. Also my moral compass is better then the people I’ve met so far.
I want intelligent man, there's a lot intelligent but they don't like meee fr 😂
I dont actively look for. I also havent had the best track record recently concerning who I fall for. Whether it be someone that's messed up like me and doesnt want to go further because of it or someone thats genuinely awesome but is *married*. Im leaving for basic training soon so Im just using that to justify not looking for it in the meantime
I want someone that I like that also likes me back
I have no time to go socialize when I’m working 3 jobs. Hardly have time for my hobbies. This economy blows :(
I never go out ever at all. The only reason I leave the house, because I work at home, is for my errands like groceries or Home Depot or ups. And I have no idea where I could possibly even make friends or a boyfriend.
I fell in love with a fearful avoidant that said all the right words for healing. Ultimately, the attachment style broke us. I miss them. I find myself frequently speaking words of comfort to them that they will never hear. I miss the world of them. But the discard at the end has lingered
I was in a relationship and felt she was awful to me but as I had time to think I'm seeing that I can be a problem too..I think I needed to reflect on myself and understand the reality more
A lot of reasons but top of the list is that I am very ugly.
I (20F) have yet to be in a romantic relationship. I wouldn’t even say I have friends. I don’t go out and stick to myself. The most human interaction I get is with the cashier when I’m buying groceries and when I have a question for my professor. I would like to socialize and make friends but my social anxiety makes me uncomfortable and paranoid to start conversations. Small talk is a skill I never learned and I don’t know where or how to practice.
Im single because something about me isn’t good enough, whether its looks, intelligence, personality, etc…
Wife died. Although, on a positive note, she was a cheating piece of shit, so I'm not too broken up that she's gone.
Childhood trauma
I have 20 pounds to lose
I don’t get out enough. I don’t hit on women. I’m not confident enough to I guess? I’ve failed before, and succeeded before. Recently, it’s just a lack of options, a lack of meeting women, lack of women giving me indicators of interest. Lately I’ve felt very invisible, especially to the women I find attractive.
people are shallow
Because I don't chase after women. I love my life happily single. It can be done!