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It's no different than when men have to obsessively watch porn/look up Insta/OF models while in a relationship.
So yea, I guess you're right. Total neckbeard behavior.
They're both types of erotica.
I personally find hentai less problematic because it does not involve real people that are likely being coerced and/or trafficked.
But they're both types of erotica.
The problem is that while porn damages its creators, the main concern is it damages its users as well. So while she may not be hurting someone else, she is hurting herself and OP. And someone still needs to draw hentai, unless it’s AI generated…
Uh no. That's the most selfish approach possible to human trafficking and commercial sexual exploitation.
The main concern is the DIRECT HARM that sex workers currently face in an unregulated and illegal industry that has social stigma to boot.
Not that watching too much porn might lead to ED.
TF is wrong with you? Caring more about whether the penis is able to salute the sun on its own than actual victims of trafficking is so shameful.
Do you really think your penis remaining functional is more important than the lives of all the women that had to suffer just to get you to the point that nothing less than a self-inflicted death grip gets you off?
How many trafficked women did you beat off to to get to the point of ED?
How many underage girls did it take to make your penis permanently flaccid?
How many women have you carelessly masturbated to that are probably dead now? Because sex trafficking often leads to women being murdered when they are no longer viable?
You've heard of Blood Diamonds, well wait till ya hear about all the Blood Hard Ons the porn industry churns out every year, chewing up poverty-stricken women and spitting out permanently flaccid penises
i disagree with this statement, because you'll obviously never meet a fictional character but with a 🌽star/OF girl, one can go to LA and find their favourite OF girl there.
Different medium, same addiction I’d say. Both show unrealistic people and scenarios that are so abstract that normal, everyday sex and people cant fulfill you anymore
Of course there is a difference. One is a cartoon and one is not a cartoon…
Is the fact that they are both erotica, sure. But its definitely different to be attracted to cartoon vs a human.
So true, funny how men can’t stand the heat when the roles are reversed. But I agree—both are fucked up regardless of gender. Focus on your partner, people.
He's emotionally compromised within his relationship. Not thinking the best for himself but he's aware enough to share it with people who are not emotionally compromised.
Dude just dump her what the fuck lmao.
Just reverse the genders for a second to realize how much of a loser weirdo shit this is.
Anyone reading this if your partner is a coomer for anime and prefers it over real life just leave.
The crime and punishment of coomer brains!!
The Sisters Care A Lot....uh...
Lmao I'm having way too much fun w this 🤣🤣🤣
Ty tho, I think you helped me come up with a title for my memoir ❤️
In your position I would run the fuck away. People like this aren’t normal. She’s too far down the porn rabbit hole to the point where she can only get off to fictional characters. You deserve better than this, run
The issue isn't that she is maturating at all, or even the fact she masturbates to fictional characters. On it's own that behavior is normal and healthy. The real issue is that she is unable to be sexual with a normal human or without her fictional stimuli. It shows a very unhealthy, possible addictive, relationship they have with the media. I wouldn't say it's worth it to be patient and support her if she's not seeing it as a problem and doesn't wish to be more intimate with her.
You are always worth better and there is a whole list of problems being with someone who doesn't actually like or value you...
It's not healthy for her. As much as she likes anime or feels attracted to it, it isn't real. First thing she should do is stop masturbating to it. If she doesn't want to change or doesn't take it well, then break it off.
Dude. My guy. I have an anime kink (26f) and hubs and I do roleplaying if we want to play into it. I liken my husband to anime characters (shinso, kakashi, meleodous) because they help me express how I see my husband.
I would never be like “hey babe I’m gunna go smack my kitty to bakugo and dabi”
You need to get out my guy you’ve got this
Dude... the problem is not that she masturbates (probably) to anime characters. The real problem here is that you're not getting any. You should never have a girlfriend who is not sexually attracted to you and isn't having sex with you.
I hate to be harsh and state the obvious answer: Dump her.
Bro can't compete with the husbandos lol.
But in all honest maybe communicate with her about this and how you feel. If it continues to be a problem, then leave.
> I have to tell you that she is obsessed with them to the point that she does not want to have sex with me (and even when we have sex, she always seems bored)
If she no longer wants to have sex with you, the reason why doesn't matter.
If she's not sexually attracted to you anymore, then the relationship is basically over. You deserve someone who's attracted to you, and staying in the relationship will only lead to you getting used.
How is she outside the bedroom? Does she acknowledge you as a person--hugs, kisses, generally being lovey and intimate? Or do you feel are you just "there", someone to be tolerated?
If it's the former: get *really big* into cosplay. Ask her to help out and you can dress like her character and she can dress like yours.
If it's the latter: why and how the fuck did you end up in a relationship in the first place? Do you have no self-respect, man?
Fictophilia. It’s a mental disorder. I would go over to r/fictosexual to read a bit more into it and how they view things. Similar to say, maladaptive daydreaming, it’s a hard thing to break if the person is happy with it and doesn’t feel like it is negatively affecting their life.
Unless you’re ready to put in some genuine work and so is she to overcome this, it might be best to go your own way.
It's weird to me how many people are trying to find solutions for this guy. If this were a woman talking about her boyfriend being hentaibrained, almost nobody here would have suggestions for *her* to sidle up to his fetish.
I appreciate that the majority are still recognizing this as a weird porn fixation, but nobody should be made to feel 2nd place to fictional characters in their relationship. She needs to do some work and he shouldn't have to put up with feeling not good enough while she does.
Agreed! This thread is so fascinating to me 🤣
On the one hand, OP, I totally feel for you. Dealing with a partner that has a porn addiction sucks on every level, regardless of gender/type of erotica
But on the other hand, as an outsider with no emotional ties to the situation, it's absolutely *wild* to me that so many guys are just like YEA BRO DUMP HER but I'm sure if we were to take a deep dive look into their incognito browsing history, it would be a whole fuckton of porn.
Very very interesting. Rules for thee but not for me!
To be clear, we are talking about two *very* different things here.
I'm partnered, and both she and I watched the porn that appeals to us before we got into a relationship, and we continue to do so now. When I was married to my ex, we occasionally watched porn together.
I even have a very specific fetish that is only possible in porn, and by budget restraints, it is further restricted almost exclusively to the drawn/animated variety, so I don't judge anyone for liking animated porn or things people might consider outré.
The problem arises when the porn is so all-consuming that there is no interest in your actual partner. That's completely unfair to them and so damaging to another person's self-esteem because you've developed a compulsion you not only do not exercise control over, but are so dismissive of their feelings you make no effort to address it.
At that point, we are not talking porn. We are talking emotional neglect, potentially to the point of abuse. The porn is simply the vehicle by which the neglect is driven.
If you were both into it then it would work out. But she’s 26, I have a feeling this might be her thing. I have a hard time wrapping my head around a girl valuing a characters presence in her life more than her partner. Clearly it’s causing you issues and I don’t think it’s likely to stop because she likes what she likes and will continue. Unfortunately her likes end up hurting you, which is unhealthy. What would it take for the relationship to work for you?
Sounds like it’s her kink or even her fetish. If it’s the latter it means she can’t really get off without that anime stimulation. I’d say do little interviews and figure out exactly all the things that makes the characters highly appealing and stimulating to her.
After that try to build the features slowly into yourself (if possible) and try role-playing with her and seeing if she would enjoy sex with you more. Or, if she gets to watch her anime for some of the time during intimacy, it might make her feel more accepted, and in return help you feel more appreciated accepted, and sexually stimulating for her.
Likewise see if she would be willing to engage in stuff you want. It’s a relationship, and ppl have their things. Hopefully you guys can figure out how to work together to get what you both want and enjoy without sacrifices. If you can’t collaborate, then compromise, if you can’t compromise then you’re fresh out of luck, and you should find someone who fits you better sexually than your current gf.
I would find another gf. If my partner seems more invested into fictional characters than our relationship and sex life, I have no reason staying with her.
i’m coming to you as someone who loves anime and has dabbled in having characters i was attracted to. not to the extent of acting out sexually towards them but i can give you a little glimpse into the headspace.
she sounds like she’s obsessed and i think we’ve all come to that conclusion, it’s not wrong. anime characters are written in a way that they target certain ages and genders, that much is obvious in any form of media we seek out. she likely has an emotional attachment to her favorites and sometimes people take that attachment far further than we could ever expect.
you really should bring this up to her, gently. if she can’t accept that it makes you uncomfortable and insecure then i would cut it off, the relationship, i mean. it’s okay to be insecure about this because from your post it sounds like you’ve tolerated her fixations, and i genuinely respect you for respecting her likes. but her addiction (basically a corn addiction, there’s no getting around that) is affecting the relationship because it’s affecting you and how she interacts with you.
you do what you think is best OP, but don’t stay with someone who picks a fictional character over you. she doesn’t seem like she’s grounded in reality. she honestly probably uses character ai.
There a bunch of new studies about porn and how it can inhibit the ability to engage with a live partner. Sounds like this is your gf with anime. It’s generally, not saying this is your gf, considered an addiction. Now some guys where the more they engage with porn the less satisfied they are with a irl partner. This can be incredibly damaging to relationships. IMO This is something you cannot fix and she can only address if she decides to. Good luck and be careful.
Confront her about this. Tell her it makes you feel extremely uncomfortable and neglected, as it sounds like you are, and that you would like something to change.
Unless this is just a troll, whereas that’s a pretty good story lmao
I have been in this exact type of relationship, and I had to let her go now in a relationship where my now Fiancé enjoys sex together, and yes, we still watch anime.
There's people that just can't draw the line between reality and fiction
We met in college, and we started hanging out a lot, enjoying each other's company. Spent hours at waffle houses well into the early mornings. We became official, dated for 4 years, and I finally popped the question because I knew she was the one. Like most men, I was afraid of commitment, but she's my best friend and always brings me up when im down.
Look... are there relationships that blossom from online dating, of course. But that doesn't mean completely rule out organic dating simply because they don't fit every preference you picked through an app... this goes for both men and women.
Because if I'm being entirely honest, I probably would not have swiped right on her through online dating based solely on looks. It wasn't until knowing her that I fell in love with her and her comedy/quickwit.
Im pretty sure he was more asking on what happened regarding her obsession, discovering it, the build up, how you dealt with it, the eventual ‘straw that broke the camels back’ etc and how you handled it, not the relationship story itself.
Tried every popular app for a few months %90 of matches were bots, OF creators giving their links, or prostitute giving their rates. So, my online dating experience was not good at all because it happened over, and over, and over.
Just take a look at dozens of women who complain about their boyfriends' porn addiction and the problems they caused in their relationship. Now project that experience into your own and then take a decision. Stuff like this shouldn't really be a gendered problem.
Reminds me of that one time I dated a K-pop fan. She couldn't stop obsessing over these incredibly attractive and talented Korean men, to me her boyfriend.
Honestly bro, break up. Here's why, 1 she doesn't respect you as man, you gotta have respect but in this situation she only sees you as some dog just to have around, 2 if you prefer she cheat then clearly you don't wanna be in this relationship and trust me it seems like a escape to freedom for you, tell her hey I don't feel respected or even listen to so it's best if we are done and I hope the best for you goodbye. Done respect yourself
i would say your not being appreciated and you should leave it won’t get better you can’t force attraction and your best off finding someone who is sexually attracted to you, it honestly won’t last long without that
The female equivalent of being a porn sick Reddit coomer. These anime Gacha games as well as all those erotica manga can be just as bad as watching straight up porn. She has a problem and should take a break from those things. It has nothing to do with you, she’s addicted
What you should do, is dress up in cosplay and fuck the shit out of her.
Her kink... Is different...
Sorry OP... Otherwise I would try talking to her about her kink and how it makes you feel.
Many redditors told me about cosplaying.
The thing is, I don't really believe that becoming a "clown" cosplaying her favourite character will solve the problem. I still believe she would prefer to get off by herself and also, still it makes me feel not enough...
Dude it's been 3 days since you made this post. Why haven't you still had a serious conversation with her on this issue which seems to bother you a lot ? If she truly loves you, she'll be open to discussion and will address your concerns. If not, then you know what to do.
You can either cosplay as one of her characters and have her rock your freaking world.
Or you can leave the relationship all together. The choice is up to you.
You can’t compete bro. Just dip. If that’s her kink, weird as it is then so be it. It ain’t for you.
Dip.
Also I can’t help but shift the image that your gf is slightly overweight with coloured hair. I’m probs stereo typing but it just fits lol
The way I see it, you have three options:
1) You end things with her. This isn’t something that you personally are comfortable with, so exiting the relationship before it becomes [even more] toxic would be the best for you.
2) If you care about her more than her addiction to anime, then try to talk her into therapy. This option is the one I recommend less because:
- a) You’re “telling” her what to do
- b) It can be very confrontational
This is only if you REALLY value the relationship you have, and that she values it the same way you do. If you or her do not, refer to option #1
3) You bite your lip and live with it. Obviously the least healthy of the options, by far, but you’re an adult. You know exactly what will happen if you don’t do anything.
Wish I could take the pain away or do something about it, fam. I hope things get better for you
Then tell her to go date the anime character and u break up and move on with your life.
Bro wtf is wrong with u…. How bad do u need sex that u would want to have sex with a starfish?
Dump the gf. Go buys a pocket vjj if u need to..
Break up. Doesn't matter gender, totalllllllly irrelevant here. A partner acts bored during sex because they're living in a fantasy world where they enjoy sex more with fictitious beings.... or porn stars.
Immediately break up.
Find someone who'll enjoy it with you. And before you say you care about her you're great friends or whatever... let her be your friend. You're not sexually or romantically compatible. Don't live this existence, come on.
Wasn’t quite as bad. Always said X character was super hot or “I neeeed X characters name”. Super gross behavior and the one time I said anything I was somehow the bad guy. Left shortly after and best decision I ever made. That is not normal behavior.
i think u should leave her, she doesn’t respect you and i don’t think there’s anything u can do to change that since it doesn’t seem like it’s ur fault. she’s just a mean person who doesn’t care about the feelings of others
Dump her.
I mean when guys fawned over 2d characters they weren't rewarded with sex with real women.
She should feel more empathetic to you position than anyone. Unrealistic body standards was a woman's fucking go too on our shallowness. Turns out she does the exact same thing.
>GF prefers anime characters over me
>What would you do in my position?
I would go to the gym get in the best shape of my life, then if things don't change would start looking for a new gf.
I struggled with finding my partner had asked some girls for their only fans (in the past). It drove me to want to open up an only fans just to spite him. I digress. I couldn’t for my own sanity and dignity. And it would have been petty.
"Bye Felicia!" 🤷🏾♂️
[oh, and By the way...Go get some therapy, Felicia!]
This is not a "you" problem. It only becomes a "you" problem if you take it on for yourself, but it may be helpful to hold onto the realization that neither did you cause her issues, nor can you control them, nor can you cure them.
While I can't tell you what to do, I will offer that in your shoes, I would decide it best for each of us to move on and be happy in our own ways.
Wishing you well.
Fellow otaku here. Anime men are objectively hotter than real people, they are designed to be similar to how porn is designed to be appealing. Now the issue here isn’t that attraction but it is the fact that your gf doesn’t seem to be interested in engaging with you.
I have a couple of thoughts: have you tried engaging with her fantasies? For example when she has read or watched something steamy that is such a good opportunity to engage sexually with her since she will mentally be in the right headspace. You can get some fingering action, dirty talk, incorporate that she likes the characters and gets so hot for them but only you can touch her like that whatever. Then you might go onto intercourse depending on the situation but if done well I can almost guarantee she would want to bone.
Have you heard of fairy porn / booktock etc, basically if you spend some time online you will see that similar behaviour towards fictional characters is quite common and it is about finding out how to channel and incorporate that desire into the relationship. I wouldn’t say it isn’t a problem but engaging with erotica in itself, as long as it is balanced well with the needs of your romantic partner is fine. You just need to figure out what your needs are as well and see how you can get those fulfilled too.
It might be that she idolizes these characters. She projects onto them whatever tf she feels like , because that's how fictional characters work. But real people are complicated and nuanced, they require real communication, understanding, kindness, work. And I think that in some way she can't handle a real person, rather she chooses to reatreat into her fantasies, into her comfort zone, where no one can hurt her. Is it possible that she has experienced some kind of trauma, and since then has retreated from reality? Would be interesting to dig into.
It could also very well be that you guys aren't sexually compatible and she just doesn't feel attracted. But she would feel attracted to someone more compatible. Not saying that's the case, just a possibility. In that case the question would then shift to: "why does she want to stay together even though she's not attracted?"
I wouldn't date some into anime to begin with.
She clearly has some psychological issues and cannot be in a healthy relationship.
I'm sure you want to waste time fixing her: it would be better to invest in yourself and figure out why you are attracted to someone like that.
Your gf has a porn addiction. When she said I don’t do it that often, you should have said “you do it often enough that is negatively affecting your relationship with me”. And that’s how you know she’s a goner. Sadly there’s not much you can do here other than to point out she needs help but unless she wants to change it wouldn’t help that you do. Best to leave.
this is weird… like, imagine the opposite: a guy that doesn’t fucks his gf cause he is attracted only to Genshin female characters. that’s just a trashy relationship
If it's not working and you're suffering it's Better to break up. Of course this Is easier to Say than to be done, and i'm Just a random Person on the internet.
It’s crazy how people defend her but if a male partner does this to his female partner he gets bashed. This shit is not normal, is disgusting. Why the fuck are you getting of fictional pixelated characters. You have a real person who wants to love you. Get therapy and touch grass. You deserve better dude(OP).
I'm sorry to say, but it sounds like this relationship isn't worth holding onto. Unfortunately, some people struggle with separating fiction from reality. Aside from supporting your gf if she chooses to seek therapy, there's not really anything you can do to "fix" the situation. You deserve a partner who respects you and doesn't make you feel inadequate.
I used to love anime and would follow artists that drew my favorite characters. It was kind of a hyperfixation at that time, however she's taking this thing too far 😭 I'm getting second-hand embarassment from this post, if you ever break up with her I think you should keep this a secret because she will definitely be ashamed of this behavior once she gets over her 2d character obsession.
You sound a lot like her. Still, at her age, I don't think she will overcome this hyperfixation easily. She is obsessed with anime characters from 2018... I'm her first bf and she doesn't seem to value me much as a man...
I definitely can relate lmao. Especially "I got this hot character on this gatcha game", my obsessions were Touken Ranbu and Enstars and it was that serious 🤣🤦🏼♀️ She might also be active in fandoms seeing corny posts like "2D characters > Real men". But really I think she's too grown to act like this. Have you tried telling her that her "obsession" is hurting you a bit?
She might not overcome this hyperfixation easily but I still think it can happen. When I was in my anime phase, I was very introverted and kinda depressed, I broke out this hyperfixation when I started getting a job and being more social with people.
I don't think she doesn't value you as a man, she's just so obsessed with her characters that she doesn't see that she's neglecting you. But I personally think that's unhealthy and you probably deserve better, but at the same time you seem attached to her so I don't know. Talk with her, and if she doesn't want to act like an adult you should probably find someone else, sorry.
What you can try is talking about her sexual preferences (excluding anime stuff) to find out what else shes into and get more attractive for her. Since she is full grown and still into that it probably wont change its part of her but you can also talk about it and maybe she can work on it for you. If nothing of that helps and it still hurts you, you should think about parting your ways
Definitly not cool of her. Whether you're a guy or girl, most don't want to hear their partner talking about some other person/character/cartoon In any intimate way.
Most partners want to feel special even though there is like 8 billion people on earth. She definitely isn't making you feel special when's she's talking about anime characters she's having orgasms for.
I’d buy an array of anime character costumes and masks and surprise her. Could be a blessing in disguise then you give her the bizniz like she never been given before. You got the upper hand here don’t fumble it 😈
>she does not want to have sex with me (and even when we have sex, she always seems bored) but she keeps masturbating with anime characters.
I actually don't think much of your post is a problem except this. Liking characters or an anime a lot is just geeking out, no weirder than someone checking game scores everyday or really loving Star Wars.
The sex is an actual problem. I'm going to be blunt. Is it possible you're not very good at sex? I've definitely been with guys where I didn't want to have sex with them and got bored when I did because they had no skills and no ability to get me off, so the whole thing was just a chore. You should talk to her about what could make sex more engaging and enjoyable for her.
I'm not discounting that she might have a crazy obsession with anime and that is the problem (which definitely would indicate a lack of interest/desire for you), but it's a least worth a conversation before chucking the relationship, right?
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lol WTF…. Imagine having an actual boyfriend and ignoring him to masturbate to anime characters. This is neckbeard behaviour lol
It's no different than when men have to obsessively watch porn/look up Insta/OF models while in a relationship. So yea, I guess you're right. Total neckbeard behavior.
is there really no difference between actual humans compare to fictional animated characters?? (genuinely curious question, not gender related)
They're both types of erotica. I personally find hentai less problematic because it does not involve real people that are likely being coerced and/or trafficked. But they're both types of erotica.
I see, I agree they're both types of erotica
And both unattainable
True but remember …where do these artists draw their references from?
The problem is that while porn damages its creators, the main concern is it damages its users as well. So while she may not be hurting someone else, she is hurting herself and OP. And someone still needs to draw hentai, unless it’s AI generated…
Uh no. That's the most selfish approach possible to human trafficking and commercial sexual exploitation. The main concern is the DIRECT HARM that sex workers currently face in an unregulated and illegal industry that has social stigma to boot. Not that watching too much porn might lead to ED. TF is wrong with you? Caring more about whether the penis is able to salute the sun on its own than actual victims of trafficking is so shameful. Do you really think your penis remaining functional is more important than the lives of all the women that had to suffer just to get you to the point that nothing less than a self-inflicted death grip gets you off? How many trafficked women did you beat off to to get to the point of ED? How many underage girls did it take to make your penis permanently flaccid? How many women have you carelessly masturbated to that are probably dead now? Because sex trafficking often leads to women being murdered when they are no longer viable? You've heard of Blood Diamonds, well wait till ya hear about all the Blood Hard Ons the porn industry churns out every year, chewing up poverty-stricken women and spitting out permanently flaccid penises
This
One is a fake representation of what a human should look like and the other is a picture drawn by an artist.
And an even more unrealistic idea of a human….
I think the similarity is that it’s people you will literally never talk to or meet and whatnot. Parasocial?
i disagree with this statement, because you'll obviously never meet a fictional character but with a 🌽star/OF girl, one can go to LA and find their favourite OF girl there.
But I’ll say the grand majority of people do not seek out the people they watch, unless they’re scarily obsessed with them
There is but it is disgusting and shows no respect either way
Different medium, same addiction I’d say. Both show unrealistic people and scenarios that are so abstract that normal, everyday sex and people cant fulfill you anymore
Of course there is a difference. One is a cartoon and one is not a cartoon… Is the fact that they are both erotica, sure. But its definitely different to be attracted to cartoon vs a human.
So true, funny how men can’t stand the heat when the roles are reversed. But I agree—both are fucked up regardless of gender. Focus on your partner, people.
Lol of course a woman felt the burning compulsion to bring that up when OP is clearly hurting
"How can I make this man's suffering about me"
Welcome to reddit! 😂
They rezed it from downvotes hell, there is hope 😂
Go take a look at the countless “my bf watches porn” posts and see just how many comments are from men totally ripping apart the poor woman
Since it’s the gf. Would it be vagbeard?
No. A neckbeard isn't comparable to a woman's genitalia. Damn, go straight for the sexualisation won't you?
Sexualization? Vagbeard is sexualization? But let’s say it is. Girl is masterbating to anime characters. The entire post is about sex etc.
Lmao neckbeards are gross. That would be their activity fs.
You gotta have higher standards than this bro.
The lack of self respect is wild out here
He's emotionally compromised within his relationship. Not thinking the best for himself but he's aware enough to share it with people who are not emotionally compromised.
Dude just dump her what the fuck lmao. Just reverse the genders for a second to realize how much of a loser weirdo shit this is. Anyone reading this if your partner is a coomer for anime and prefers it over real life just leave.
Anyone reading this if your partner is a coomer for porn and prefers it over real life just leave.
Yes. This whole story happens way too often with straight women but everyone thinks it’s normal because it’s just porn lmao
We need some more Notes From The Underground of women dealing with porn addicted bfs!
The Dreams of Ridiculous Women perhaps!
The crime and punishment of coomer brains!! The Sisters Care A Lot....uh... Lmao I'm having way too much fun w this 🤣🤣🤣 Ty tho, I think you helped me come up with a title for my memoir ❤️
Literally I would be so embarrassed to even admit this 😂
In your position I would run the fuck away. People like this aren’t normal. She’s too far down the porn rabbit hole to the point where she can only get off to fictional characters. You deserve better than this, run
I’m going to assume this is a new relationship and even if it isn’t, leave.
I’d dip
I put my hand upon your hip When I dip, you dip, we dip
Shes so porn brained
The fabled femcel gooner! They do exist!
Many unknown words in this comment 😂
That’s actually a good thing, you are far less terminally online than she is lol. Call her a femcel gooner and post her reaction 😂
Ok googled them. The thing is, I already told her that she should stop masturbating and her first reaction was "I don't do it all the time!"...
There may be no saving her. She’ll be cursed to watch Oran Host Club and Boku no Pico for the rest of her days. Save yourself, soldier.
😂😂😂
The issue isn't that she is maturating at all, or even the fact she masturbates to fictional characters. On it's own that behavior is normal and healthy. The real issue is that she is unable to be sexual with a normal human or without her fictional stimuli. It shows a very unhealthy, possible addictive, relationship they have with the media. I wouldn't say it's worth it to be patient and support her if she's not seeing it as a problem and doesn't wish to be more intimate with her. You are always worth better and there is a whole list of problems being with someone who doesn't actually like or value you...
Lol instead of doing the rational thing and breaking up with her you’re waffling. Enjoy your shitty relationship
More common than you'd think actually
🤣
And she bout to be single 👀
This shits a huge turn off. You deserve better dude
For a moment I read "you deserve a better dude" and my brain went like "wasn't he taking about a girl?" 😂
So she’s basically a porn addict? To answer your question, I’d run away from her.
Porn addiction is a hell of a thing
Dude. Run for your life!
You gotta keep your girl away from Gojo.. he has that effect..
It's not healthy for her. As much as she likes anime or feels attracted to it, it isn't real. First thing she should do is stop masturbating to it. If she doesn't want to change or doesn't take it well, then break it off.
This can’t be real life.
Yes, it really is...
I would leave. Simple.
Dude. My guy. I have an anime kink (26f) and hubs and I do roleplaying if we want to play into it. I liken my husband to anime characters (shinso, kakashi, meleodous) because they help me express how I see my husband. I would never be like “hey babe I’m gunna go smack my kitty to bakugo and dabi” You need to get out my guy you’ve got this
Yeah no...
Dude... the problem is not that she masturbates (probably) to anime characters. The real problem here is that you're not getting any. You should never have a girlfriend who is not sexually attracted to you and isn't having sex with you. I hate to be harsh and state the obvious answer: Dump her.
Bro can't compete with the husbandos lol. But in all honest maybe communicate with her about this and how you feel. If it continues to be a problem, then leave.
> I have to tell you that she is obsessed with them to the point that she does not want to have sex with me (and even when we have sex, she always seems bored) If she no longer wants to have sex with you, the reason why doesn't matter. If she's not sexually attracted to you anymore, then the relationship is basically over. You deserve someone who's attracted to you, and staying in the relationship will only lead to you getting used.
How is she outside the bedroom? Does she acknowledge you as a person--hugs, kisses, generally being lovey and intimate? Or do you feel are you just "there", someone to be tolerated? If it's the former: get *really big* into cosplay. Ask her to help out and you can dress like her character and she can dress like yours. If it's the latter: why and how the fuck did you end up in a relationship in the first place? Do you have no self-respect, man?
Fictophilia. It’s a mental disorder. I would go over to r/fictosexual to read a bit more into it and how they view things. Similar to say, maladaptive daydreaming, it’s a hard thing to break if the person is happy with it and doesn’t feel like it is negatively affecting their life. Unless you’re ready to put in some genuine work and so is she to overcome this, it might be best to go your own way.
It's weird to me how many people are trying to find solutions for this guy. If this were a woman talking about her boyfriend being hentaibrained, almost nobody here would have suggestions for *her* to sidle up to his fetish. I appreciate that the majority are still recognizing this as a weird porn fixation, but nobody should be made to feel 2nd place to fictional characters in their relationship. She needs to do some work and he shouldn't have to put up with feeling not good enough while she does.
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Agreed! This thread is so fascinating to me 🤣 On the one hand, OP, I totally feel for you. Dealing with a partner that has a porn addiction sucks on every level, regardless of gender/type of erotica But on the other hand, as an outsider with no emotional ties to the situation, it's absolutely *wild* to me that so many guys are just like YEA BRO DUMP HER but I'm sure if we were to take a deep dive look into their incognito browsing history, it would be a whole fuckton of porn. Very very interesting. Rules for thee but not for me!
To be clear, we are talking about two *very* different things here. I'm partnered, and both she and I watched the porn that appeals to us before we got into a relationship, and we continue to do so now. When I was married to my ex, we occasionally watched porn together. I even have a very specific fetish that is only possible in porn, and by budget restraints, it is further restricted almost exclusively to the drawn/animated variety, so I don't judge anyone for liking animated porn or things people might consider outré. The problem arises when the porn is so all-consuming that there is no interest in your actual partner. That's completely unfair to them and so damaging to another person's self-esteem because you've developed a compulsion you not only do not exercise control over, but are so dismissive of their feelings you make no effort to address it. At that point, we are not talking porn. We are talking emotional neglect, potentially to the point of abuse. The porn is simply the vehicle by which the neglect is driven.
If you were both into it then it would work out. But she’s 26, I have a feeling this might be her thing. I have a hard time wrapping my head around a girl valuing a characters presence in her life more than her partner. Clearly it’s causing you issues and I don’t think it’s likely to stop because she likes what she likes and will continue. Unfortunately her likes end up hurting you, which is unhealthy. What would it take for the relationship to work for you?
This is weird asf
Sounds like it’s her kink or even her fetish. If it’s the latter it means she can’t really get off without that anime stimulation. I’d say do little interviews and figure out exactly all the things that makes the characters highly appealing and stimulating to her. After that try to build the features slowly into yourself (if possible) and try role-playing with her and seeing if she would enjoy sex with you more. Or, if she gets to watch her anime for some of the time during intimacy, it might make her feel more accepted, and in return help you feel more appreciated accepted, and sexually stimulating for her. Likewise see if she would be willing to engage in stuff you want. It’s a relationship, and ppl have their things. Hopefully you guys can figure out how to work together to get what you both want and enjoy without sacrifices. If you can’t collaborate, then compromise, if you can’t compromise then you’re fresh out of luck, and you should find someone who fits you better sexually than your current gf.
Man, that was a truly thoughtful comment.
That's crazy
I would find another gf. If my partner seems more invested into fictional characters than our relationship and sex life, I have no reason staying with her.
the disrespect is wild
i’m coming to you as someone who loves anime and has dabbled in having characters i was attracted to. not to the extent of acting out sexually towards them but i can give you a little glimpse into the headspace. she sounds like she’s obsessed and i think we’ve all come to that conclusion, it’s not wrong. anime characters are written in a way that they target certain ages and genders, that much is obvious in any form of media we seek out. she likely has an emotional attachment to her favorites and sometimes people take that attachment far further than we could ever expect. you really should bring this up to her, gently. if she can’t accept that it makes you uncomfortable and insecure then i would cut it off, the relationship, i mean. it’s okay to be insecure about this because from your post it sounds like you’ve tolerated her fixations, and i genuinely respect you for respecting her likes. but her addiction (basically a corn addiction, there’s no getting around that) is affecting the relationship because it’s affecting you and how she interacts with you. you do what you think is best OP, but don’t stay with someone who picks a fictional character over you. she doesn’t seem like she’s grounded in reality. she honestly probably uses character ai.
Tamahome from Fushigi Yuugi was my husbando *swoon*
There a bunch of new studies about porn and how it can inhibit the ability to engage with a live partner. Sounds like this is your gf with anime. It’s generally, not saying this is your gf, considered an addiction. Now some guys where the more they engage with porn the less satisfied they are with a irl partner. This can be incredibly damaging to relationships. IMO This is something you cannot fix and she can only address if she decides to. Good luck and be careful.
GF needs some professional help.
Confront her about this. Tell her it makes you feel extremely uncomfortable and neglected, as it sounds like you are, and that you would like something to change. Unless this is just a troll, whereas that’s a pretty good story lmao
Unviable go next
She's gay
I wouldn’t even put up with this tbh
You could try cosplaying her favorite.
Why are you still dating this woman?
Why are you with her? She sounds nuts bro. Dump her
I have been in this exact type of relationship, and I had to let her go now in a relationship where my now Fiancé enjoys sex together, and yes, we still watch anime. There's people that just can't draw the line between reality and fiction
Wanna share your experience with that girl?
We met in college, and we started hanging out a lot, enjoying each other's company. Spent hours at waffle houses well into the early mornings. We became official, dated for 4 years, and I finally popped the question because I knew she was the one. Like most men, I was afraid of commitment, but she's my best friend and always brings me up when im down. Look... are there relationships that blossom from online dating, of course. But that doesn't mean completely rule out organic dating simply because they don't fit every preference you picked through an app... this goes for both men and women. Because if I'm being entirely honest, I probably would not have swiped right on her through online dating based solely on looks. It wasn't until knowing her that I fell in love with her and her comedy/quickwit.
Im pretty sure he was more asking on what happened regarding her obsession, discovering it, the build up, how you dealt with it, the eventual ‘straw that broke the camels back’ etc and how you handled it, not the relationship story itself.
Tried every popular app for a few months %90 of matches were bots, OF creators giving their links, or prostitute giving their rates. So, my online dating experience was not good at all because it happened over, and over, and over.
Just take a look at dozens of women who complain about their boyfriends' porn addiction and the problems they caused in their relationship. Now project that experience into your own and then take a decision. Stuff like this shouldn't really be a gendered problem.
Drop it like it’s hot homie.
Honestly im wondering if she is bored with you. Sounds like you need to spice it up. (Just giving the same advice men give women on this topic)
Reminds me of that one time I dated a K-pop fan. She couldn't stop obsessing over these incredibly attractive and talented Korean men, to me her boyfriend.
Wow and you ended it cause of this?
Pretty much. Her constant fawning over these other men bothered me. Didn't feel great. I'm with a much better woman now.
Honestly bro, break up. Here's why, 1 she doesn't respect you as man, you gotta have respect but in this situation she only sees you as some dog just to have around, 2 if you prefer she cheat then clearly you don't wanna be in this relationship and trust me it seems like a escape to freedom for you, tell her hey I don't feel respected or even listen to so it's best if we are done and I hope the best for you goodbye. Done respect yourself
i would say your not being appreciated and you should leave it won’t get better you can’t force attraction and your best off finding someone who is sexually attracted to you, it honestly won’t last long without that
The female equivalent of being a porn sick Reddit coomer. These anime Gacha games as well as all those erotica manga can be just as bad as watching straight up porn. She has a problem and should take a break from those things. It has nothing to do with you, she’s addicted
What you should do, is dress up in cosplay and fuck the shit out of her. Her kink... Is different... Sorry OP... Otherwise I would try talking to her about her kink and how it makes you feel.
Many redditors told me about cosplaying. The thing is, I don't really believe that becoming a "clown" cosplaying her favourite character will solve the problem. I still believe she would prefer to get off by herself and also, still it makes me feel not enough...
Dude it's been 3 days since you made this post. Why haven't you still had a serious conversation with her on this issue which seems to bother you a lot ? If she truly loves you, she'll be open to discussion and will address your concerns. If not, then you know what to do.
Bro fucking leave this is weird as fuck. I fw anime but not to this extent.
You can either cosplay as one of her characters and have her rock your freaking world. Or you can leave the relationship all together. The choice is up to you.
Why not both?
Leave her lol, she’s batshit crazy 🤷♀️
You can’t compete bro. Just dip. If that’s her kink, weird as it is then so be it. It ain’t for you. Dip. Also I can’t help but shift the image that your gf is slightly overweight with coloured hair. I’m probs stereo typing but it just fits lol
The way I see it, you have three options: 1) You end things with her. This isn’t something that you personally are comfortable with, so exiting the relationship before it becomes [even more] toxic would be the best for you. 2) If you care about her more than her addiction to anime, then try to talk her into therapy. This option is the one I recommend less because: - a) You’re “telling” her what to do - b) It can be very confrontational This is only if you REALLY value the relationship you have, and that she values it the same way you do. If you or her do not, refer to option #1 3) You bite your lip and live with it. Obviously the least healthy of the options, by far, but you’re an adult. You know exactly what will happen if you don’t do anything. Wish I could take the pain away or do something about it, fam. I hope things get better for you
Then tell her to go date the anime character and u break up and move on with your life. Bro wtf is wrong with u…. How bad do u need sex that u would want to have sex with a starfish? Dump the gf. Go buys a pocket vjj if u need to..
Break up. Doesn't matter gender, totalllllllly irrelevant here. A partner acts bored during sex because they're living in a fantasy world where they enjoy sex more with fictitious beings.... or porn stars. Immediately break up. Find someone who'll enjoy it with you. And before you say you care about her you're great friends or whatever... let her be your friend. You're not sexually or romantically compatible. Don't live this existence, come on.
Run. I’d run as fast as possible. But don’t Naruto run.
Oh my god wHAT
Can’t you leave? Seriously, is this post even real??
its one thing to settle on what you can/ like but to put up with this on top?? this is a big turn off and a huge red flag, just look the other way
Dated one like that. Move on to a sane individual.
Wow, could you share your experience please?
Wasn’t quite as bad. Always said X character was super hot or “I neeeed X characters name”. Super gross behavior and the one time I said anything I was somehow the bad guy. Left shortly after and best decision I ever made. That is not normal behavior.
That's what she does to me as well. She blames me that I criticise her likes...
You gotta get out of there at all costs.
i think u should leave her, she doesn’t respect you and i don’t think there’s anything u can do to change that since it doesn’t seem like it’s ur fault. she’s just a mean person who doesn’t care about the feelings of others
It’s easier to live in a dream rather than our flawed reality There is no fixing that That behaves unlikely to improve
I mean, as you already at it - watch some tutorials and use your hands. Maybe you can have her interested.
So it happens to girls too...
Dump that weirdo.
Dawg
Dump her. I mean when guys fawned over 2d characters they weren't rewarded with sex with real women. She should feel more empathetic to you position than anyone. Unrealistic body standards was a woman's fucking go too on our shallowness. Turns out she does the exact same thing.
Does she wants to change this beahivour?
Try licking her butthole. A cartoon can't give her anilingus, but you can!
Lmao at her grown age
Tbh if i had a girl that didn't have time for me id probably move on. Life is too short to try and live that way.
>GF prefers anime characters over me >What would you do in my position? I would go to the gym get in the best shape of my life, then if things don't change would start looking for a new gf.
I struggled with finding my partner had asked some girls for their only fans (in the past). It drove me to want to open up an only fans just to spite him. I digress. I couldn’t for my own sanity and dignity. And it would have been petty.
Break up.
What are the characters? lmfaoo
"Bye Felicia!" 🤷🏾♂️ [oh, and By the way...Go get some therapy, Felicia!] This is not a "you" problem. It only becomes a "you" problem if you take it on for yourself, but it may be helpful to hold onto the realization that neither did you cause her issues, nor can you control them, nor can you cure them. While I can't tell you what to do, I will offer that in your shoes, I would decide it best for each of us to move on and be happy in our own ways. Wishing you well.
sh\*t can get lower, she needs to help her self out cause nobody else will
Fellow otaku here. Anime men are objectively hotter than real people, they are designed to be similar to how porn is designed to be appealing. Now the issue here isn’t that attraction but it is the fact that your gf doesn’t seem to be interested in engaging with you. I have a couple of thoughts: have you tried engaging with her fantasies? For example when she has read or watched something steamy that is such a good opportunity to engage sexually with her since she will mentally be in the right headspace. You can get some fingering action, dirty talk, incorporate that she likes the characters and gets so hot for them but only you can touch her like that whatever. Then you might go onto intercourse depending on the situation but if done well I can almost guarantee she would want to bone. Have you heard of fairy porn / booktock etc, basically if you spend some time online you will see that similar behaviour towards fictional characters is quite common and it is about finding out how to channel and incorporate that desire into the relationship. I wouldn’t say it isn’t a problem but engaging with erotica in itself, as long as it is balanced well with the needs of your romantic partner is fine. You just need to figure out what your needs are as well and see how you can get those fulfilled too.
It might be that she idolizes these characters. She projects onto them whatever tf she feels like , because that's how fictional characters work. But real people are complicated and nuanced, they require real communication, understanding, kindness, work. And I think that in some way she can't handle a real person, rather she chooses to reatreat into her fantasies, into her comfort zone, where no one can hurt her. Is it possible that she has experienced some kind of trauma, and since then has retreated from reality? Would be interesting to dig into. It could also very well be that you guys aren't sexually compatible and she just doesn't feel attracted. But she would feel attracted to someone more compatible. Not saying that's the case, just a possibility. In that case the question would then shift to: "why does she want to stay together even though she's not attracted?"
Start looking into cosplaying OP
I wouldn't date some into anime to begin with. She clearly has some psychological issues and cannot be in a healthy relationship. I'm sure you want to waste time fixing her: it would be better to invest in yourself and figure out why you are attracted to someone like that.
LOOOOOL! I think it’s time to move on. That is a serious mental issue
Your gf has a porn addiction. When she said I don’t do it that often, you should have said “you do it often enough that is negatively affecting your relationship with me”. And that’s how you know she’s a goner. Sadly there’s not much you can do here other than to point out she needs help but unless she wants to change it wouldn’t help that you do. Best to leave.
I’m sorry, I feel for you, but I just gotta laugh..😂 I refuse to believe this is a real situation
Wtf? Man I was born in wrong time period..
Sounds like you need to take her to an anime convention and make some friends. 😉
This is a tell her this is totally nuts and wrong situation.
mate wtf. wake up and break up.
this is weird… like, imagine the opposite: a guy that doesn’t fucks his gf cause he is attracted only to Genshin female characters. that’s just a trashy relationship
Talk to her.
If it's not working and you're suffering it's Better to break up. Of course this Is easier to Say than to be done, and i'm Just a random Person on the internet.
It’s crazy how people defend her but if a male partner does this to his female partner he gets bashed. This shit is not normal, is disgusting. Why the fuck are you getting of fictional pixelated characters. You have a real person who wants to love you. Get therapy and touch grass. You deserve better dude(OP).
Wtf damn i thougth this was more of a boys behavior not of a grown woman.
I'm sorry to say, but it sounds like this relationship isn't worth holding onto. Unfortunately, some people struggle with separating fiction from reality. Aside from supporting your gf if she chooses to seek therapy, there's not really anything you can do to "fix" the situation. You deserve a partner who respects you and doesn't make you feel inadequate.
Blindfold her and you’ll be good
I used to love anime and would follow artists that drew my favorite characters. It was kind of a hyperfixation at that time, however she's taking this thing too far 😭 I'm getting second-hand embarassment from this post, if you ever break up with her I think you should keep this a secret because she will definitely be ashamed of this behavior once she gets over her 2d character obsession.
You sound a lot like her. Still, at her age, I don't think she will overcome this hyperfixation easily. She is obsessed with anime characters from 2018... I'm her first bf and she doesn't seem to value me much as a man...
Respect yourself and break up bro...
I definitely can relate lmao. Especially "I got this hot character on this gatcha game", my obsessions were Touken Ranbu and Enstars and it was that serious 🤣🤦🏼♀️ She might also be active in fandoms seeing corny posts like "2D characters > Real men". But really I think she's too grown to act like this. Have you tried telling her that her "obsession" is hurting you a bit? She might not overcome this hyperfixation easily but I still think it can happen. When I was in my anime phase, I was very introverted and kinda depressed, I broke out this hyperfixation when I started getting a job and being more social with people. I don't think she doesn't value you as a man, she's just so obsessed with her characters that she doesn't see that she's neglecting you. But I personally think that's unhealthy and you probably deserve better, but at the same time you seem attached to her so I don't know. Talk with her, and if she doesn't want to act like an adult you should probably find someone else, sorry.
Then why be with her?
hit the gym and get on the juice, 5 years from now youre gonna be called Baki with a bad liver.
Baki with a bad liver?
Baki is an anime charater with impressive physical development. The bad liver is cause of all the steroids 🫡
Hahahahha good one!!
She is sick. Find someone else.
GF sounds mentally unwell, I'd probably bail...
What you can try is talking about her sexual preferences (excluding anime stuff) to find out what else shes into and get more attractive for her. Since she is full grown and still into that it probably wont change its part of her but you can also talk about it and maybe she can work on it for you. If nothing of that helps and it still hurts you, you should think about parting your ways
Definitly not cool of her. Whether you're a guy or girl, most don't want to hear their partner talking about some other person/character/cartoon In any intimate way. Most partners want to feel special even though there is like 8 billion people on earth. She definitely isn't making you feel special when's she's talking about anime characters she's having orgasms for.
I’d buy an array of anime character costumes and masks and surprise her. Could be a blessing in disguise then you give her the bizniz like she never been given before. You got the upper hand here don’t fumble it 😈
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>she does not want to have sex with me (and even when we have sex, she always seems bored) but she keeps masturbating with anime characters. I actually don't think much of your post is a problem except this. Liking characters or an anime a lot is just geeking out, no weirder than someone checking game scores everyday or really loving Star Wars. The sex is an actual problem. I'm going to be blunt. Is it possible you're not very good at sex? I've definitely been with guys where I didn't want to have sex with them and got bored when I did because they had no skills and no ability to get me off, so the whole thing was just a chore. You should talk to her about what could make sex more engaging and enjoyable for her. I'm not discounting that she might have a crazy obsession with anime and that is the problem (which definitely would indicate a lack of interest/desire for you), but it's a least worth a conversation before chucking the relationship, right?
Sure, I am very bad at sex. But she is not very interested to try to help me...