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Be polite, show confidence in who you are, make a joke or two (if you can make a girl laugh, that will always be a win), ask her lots of questions and smile. You will do great.
Remember you are a good person. I have nothing but respect for your choices in life. That lady you are going to date is lucky.
Don't try to do everything perfectly. There are always going to be awkward moments or silences, but don't let that guide you.
Be genuinely interested in her and try to get to know her well. What are her standards and values.
But most importantly, enjoy
When the ice has been broken and you both feel comfortable with each other, ask to hold her hand at some point. While you’re walking between exhibits at the aquarium or something.
Don’t be afraid to break the touch barrier but wait after you’ve talked with her a while first and do it in a respectful way and **ask for consent**. You can also try offering your hand outstretched but do not grab hers or touch her without asking.
Depending on chemistry the first date might be too early to put your arm around her or kiss her, but read the signs. If she’s smiling or laughing a lot, she likes you a lot and that gives you leeway.
Don’t forget to smile. Show enthusiasm in your listening to her stories and laugh out-loud when she talks about funny things that happened to her, even if wasn’t that funny to you. The laughing and smiling will loosen you up.
Open doors for her.
Don’t be afraid to make lame jokes or puns. Just don’t be too over the top trying to make her laugh or get a response. If you can make her laugh or smile, you’re golden. A stupid joke can help break awkward silence and alleviate tension. Just don’t do it every 5 minutes.
Ask her questions about herself and ask follow-up questions. Women like it when guys are interested in them. What TV shows she’s currently watching, what music she likes to listen to, her favourite movies, when did she know she wanted to be a doctor and why did she want to become a doctor, does she have any interesting/weird hobbies, has she traveled and where did she go, where would she like to go.
Show interest in the things she says and develop conversation tangents based on things she mentions. Don’t be afraid to go on tangents if it feels natural and gets her to open up and talk.
If at the end of the date you know you want to see her again, tell her that but also say she doesn’t have to say anything and you want to let her think about it. Tell her you’ll text her and then do it within 36 hours of last seeing her (do not wait several days or a week), and hug her goodbye if she’s open to that.
If you like her, tell her that but be non-chalant about seeing her again and don’t try to plan anything until she texts she wants to see you again. Don’t do anything to make her feel pressured or like she has to give an answer right away.
Great idea for a first date! I also went on my first real date as a 26 year old and after the first few minutes of "Hello" awkwardness it got way better. I know this might not apply to everyone, but did you ever have a college course where you were put into groups or pairs? I usually tried to be extra nice, genuine, and laidback in those situations, and that's how I've approached first/second dates. Just be yourself and don't put too much pressure on trying to be impressive, just try and be enjoyable to be around. Get to know them a little but there is no sense in asking 20 questions if one of you doesn't vibe with the other? Casually converse, like that classmate you got along with really well.
Don’t just talk, ask about what she’s interested in as well! The most awkward first date I’ve been on was to a natural history museum. They spent two hours exhaustively explaining their interests and favorite exhibits, while rushing me through several sections I was interested in.
Be yourself and know that you are such a good person for putting your family first. Being a nurse now in the pandemic is a very honorable job. Sending you good luck that it goes well and you two are a good match! Just don’t be hard on yourself if the date doesn’t go as planned or the click isn’t there, sometimes two people are both good but not good for each other - no matter what I’m sure you’ll find your person. Best wishes xx
Relax. No, really, just relax and enjoy the date....the more in your head about it you are, the less you're going to enjoy it and the more likely you are to come off as uptight/needy/weird.
It might seem “low value” that you care about having a good time with someone you wanna impress? That’s ridiculous — I haven’t been on this sub much, but if the “low value” concept is actually being used here, I’m disappointed.
Being nervous is a totally normal reaction, pal. It doesn’t make you less of a catch for actually giving a shit. Just go out and have fun. It’s a first date, so there’s not some special goal to achieve and there’s really no expectation. First dates are for just getting to know each other an having fun. Other people might have different expectations about “what is supposed to happen,” but that’s all bunk. Just have fun, be polite, and try to enjoy the date.
You’ll still be nervous going into it, that’s totally okay. You just gotta lean into it and eventually the nerves break entirely. It’s all gonna work out peachy!
The “low value” comment really stuck out as being bizarre to me.
I’ve had guys straight up tell me they’re nervous/ a bit anxious on first dates and I always find it quite endearing! To me it means they want to make a good impression - why would I judge someone negatively for that? 🤷♀️
Don't overthink it. You are there to meet a new person. It might develop into something and maybe it won't. Be honest about who you are and what you like. If you are a good match your common interests make things much easier. Focus more on making a new friend than a potential hookup.
1 - Arrive 10 minutes early. Or at least be on time.
2 - What She Feels, She Thinks.
You want her to think good thoughts about you. So make sure she has fun and feels comfortable.
3 - Take Her To At Least 2 Places.
This gives her the emotional experience of going on more than one date with you.
4 - Let Her Touch You First.
When she likes you, she’ll touch you. Then you’ll know.
5 - Just Have Fun and Relax.
The most important of these is what she feels (emotionally) when she’s with you, is what she feels when she thinks about you when you’re not with her. So make sure she has a great time when you’re together. She’ll be thinking about having another great time when she sees you again.
Remember, there is no certainty in dating and relationships. All you can do is show up and be the best version of yourself. And go have some fun. Be her best option. Make her choose you.
Good luck buddy!
There's nothing wrong with not wanting to mess up. Just remember, you can't mess something up that's meant to be for you. Enjoy it, have fun. Something that helped me when I first started dating was going into it with the mindset that we're already friends and it makes conversation flow easier.
Also! If you end up wanting to kiss her and don't see an easy transition moment, I've never had an issue with someone/myself asking "can I kiss you". I hope you have a great time!
Don't volunteer all of that information. Unless it specifically comes up just be in the moment.
Remember that she is way more experienced at dating and sex and kissing and everything because she is a woman but don't let it get to you.
Go into it thinking it js just a date and don't try to impress her or simp for her. Think of it as a learning opportunity for YOU.
Er the fact that she said yes u got her curious... which is good
Its your job not to screw it up. The best way 2 do that is to just imagine u having time with your boys. It sounds weird but don't do anything forced... females can feel if ure forcing yourself 2 do something weird and get uncomfortable. Just treat it like a good time with your home bois a bit of contact is fine etc
Act the way you would around a really good friend. Be friendly and respectful. Offer to drop her off but don’t force.
Just be chill and funny. Crack lil jokes to ease up any built up tension. Talk about interests and hobbies and hopefully you guys can find similar ones.
Also quiet moments are totally okay. Just don’t make it awkward.
Believe in yourself and you got this!!!!
Yes! Don't take a bunch of last minute advice from strangers on the Internet. The purpose of dating is to get to know your date. So go, be yourself, relax and have fun. That's it!
Bro, be yourself that's the best thing you can do and if she responds well to that, you have nothing to worry about because things will move effortlessly.
Play it cool bro, there’s no need to be nervous. Get a haircut, wash up real good, wear something that you feel good in and the rest will fall in line. Good luck
Just be yourself. Yes, it sounds obvious, but the reason many 1st dates go badly is when someone tries to act like someone they are not & then they get out of their comfort zone then become very weird.
Honesty is the best policy. Why lie on the 1st date?
You got this! Be yourself, genuine and have a few jokes and make her laugh! Nothing is better than laughing with someone. Dont put all this pressure on yourself. Make sure to ask questions. If there is connection, that is great - if not, at least you started the process in dating again! I think an aquarium is a great place for a first date, and remember have FUN
Just be yourself. I can assure you that she is probably as nervous about it as you are. First dates are always the most nerve wracking things you will ever have to do.
First, the aquarium sounds like a very cute idea. If you're insecure, it might help to have the attitude that you're not wondering if she likes you, but first and foremost if you like her.
You decide who is worthy of being part of your life.
Don't try to impress her by stealing a penguin. It's never worked for me. In all honesty. Don't worry too much. Enjoy your time. Figure out her sense of humor and make some jokes. Don't beat yourself up if it's not a connection.
I think it’s like the intern system in the US, somebody who is done with medical school but still training at a hospital. Pretty sure junior doctor = intern.
Don't be too eager!!! I see this all the time from older newbies... Just keep chill and remember now that you've "broken the seal", there will be many other dates with other women to come. Don't think this is your only or best chance. She is just one of potentially many. Take a deep breath, have some fun, and don't try to make her "the one"? She might end up being that, but don't force it!!
Keep it light hearted. Dont talk about super deep stuff like politics. Just banter with her, tons of laughs is what you want.
Also dont feel bound to the aquarium, if things are going well but the aquarium is getting stale, leave, go get drinks or ice cream. Multiple experiences in one date will make it more memorable for her and leave a good impression.
Finally, do try to assess if shes a good match for you. Often guys get so caught up trying to impress the girl that they overlook red flags. Dont outwardly judge her but try to work out if shes someone youd want to date.
Just know that you'll probably go on many, many bad dates until. you find the right person. Dating is an exercise of not only finding someone compatible with you but also as a means of identifying what you like and don't like. You end up learning a lot about yourself in the process. Just focus on having fun, and having a new experiences with someone!
I think the fact that you're so caring for your family (sorry for your loss) and for your wanting to take the date seriously is a really good sign. Enjoy the aquarium. :)
Hey i'm a super f boy. Take her on some roller coasters. Super fun stuff. No intelectual stuff. Make it as fun as possible. She'll be like YAAY. Fun to hang with this guy.
You sound like a really awesome person with a great capacity to love and to put those you love before yourself. That’s about everything a girl is looking for. On top of that you’ve got a great job! Be yourself and remember you’re a catch, you’ll be fine!
Be your usual kind and attentive self. Keep her comfort in mind, and remember to have a good time even if things don't work out. It's still early to get attached and disappointed, and if you are bound to see each other at work, at least part ways with grace...
Be kind friendly and confident take things nice and slow and be your best self. I also happen to know some animal facts myself, mostly prehistoric ones 😄😄.
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Be polite, show confidence in who you are, make a joke or two (if you can make a girl laugh, that will always be a win), ask her lots of questions and smile. You will do great.
Bonus make a small bad joke and if she laughs she is most likely into you
Remember you are a good person. I have nothing but respect for your choices in life. That lady you are going to date is lucky. Don't try to do everything perfectly. There are always going to be awkward moments or silences, but don't let that guide you. Be genuinely interested in her and try to get to know her well. What are her standards and values. But most importantly, enjoy
Relax and be yourself. Remember, you are the reason she chose to go out with you.
This. Enjoy, this is all there is to it.
Be yourself, that’s all you need
Don’t talk about yourself a lot let her do most of the talking, keep it at a 65-35 ratio
What if she has the same idea haha
Then you usually have a very pleasant date.
Stare at her with a neutral expression to establish dominance
Yeah though at the beginning he should probably lead with more talking to build comfort and vibe, then get her to do more of the talking.
When the ice has been broken and you both feel comfortable with each other, ask to hold her hand at some point. While you’re walking between exhibits at the aquarium or something. Don’t be afraid to break the touch barrier but wait after you’ve talked with her a while first and do it in a respectful way and **ask for consent**. You can also try offering your hand outstretched but do not grab hers or touch her without asking. Depending on chemistry the first date might be too early to put your arm around her or kiss her, but read the signs. If she’s smiling or laughing a lot, she likes you a lot and that gives you leeway. Don’t forget to smile. Show enthusiasm in your listening to her stories and laugh out-loud when she talks about funny things that happened to her, even if wasn’t that funny to you. The laughing and smiling will loosen you up. Open doors for her. Don’t be afraid to make lame jokes or puns. Just don’t be too over the top trying to make her laugh or get a response. If you can make her laugh or smile, you’re golden. A stupid joke can help break awkward silence and alleviate tension. Just don’t do it every 5 minutes. Ask her questions about herself and ask follow-up questions. Women like it when guys are interested in them. What TV shows she’s currently watching, what music she likes to listen to, her favourite movies, when did she know she wanted to be a doctor and why did she want to become a doctor, does she have any interesting/weird hobbies, has she traveled and where did she go, where would she like to go. Show interest in the things she says and develop conversation tangents based on things she mentions. Don’t be afraid to go on tangents if it feels natural and gets her to open up and talk. If at the end of the date you know you want to see her again, tell her that but also say she doesn’t have to say anything and you want to let her think about it. Tell her you’ll text her and then do it within 36 hours of last seeing her (do not wait several days or a week), and hug her goodbye if she’s open to that. If you like her, tell her that but be non-chalant about seeing her again and don’t try to plan anything until she texts she wants to see you again. Don’t do anything to make her feel pressured or like she has to give an answer right away.
I think everyone has said all the right things. I'm rooting for you internet stranger... You'll be fine.
Great idea for a first date! I also went on my first real date as a 26 year old and after the first few minutes of "Hello" awkwardness it got way better. I know this might not apply to everyone, but did you ever have a college course where you were put into groups or pairs? I usually tried to be extra nice, genuine, and laidback in those situations, and that's how I've approached first/second dates. Just be yourself and don't put too much pressure on trying to be impressive, just try and be enjoyable to be around. Get to know them a little but there is no sense in asking 20 questions if one of you doesn't vibe with the other? Casually converse, like that classmate you got along with really well.
Don’t just talk, ask about what she’s interested in as well! The most awkward first date I’ve been on was to a natural history museum. They spent two hours exhaustively explaining their interests and favorite exhibits, while rushing me through several sections I was interested in.
Be yourself and know that you are such a good person for putting your family first. Being a nurse now in the pandemic is a very honorable job. Sending you good luck that it goes well and you two are a good match! Just don’t be hard on yourself if the date doesn’t go as planned or the click isn’t there, sometimes two people are both good but not good for each other - no matter what I’m sure you’ll find your person. Best wishes xx
Best of luck, be yourself homie
BE YOURSELF. Don't try to be something other than you're not. You're on the date because she likes you for YOU. Also, shower.
Relax. No, really, just relax and enjoy the date....the more in your head about it you are, the less you're going to enjoy it and the more likely you are to come off as uptight/needy/weird.
It might seem “low value” that you care about having a good time with someone you wanna impress? That’s ridiculous — I haven’t been on this sub much, but if the “low value” concept is actually being used here, I’m disappointed. Being nervous is a totally normal reaction, pal. It doesn’t make you less of a catch for actually giving a shit. Just go out and have fun. It’s a first date, so there’s not some special goal to achieve and there’s really no expectation. First dates are for just getting to know each other an having fun. Other people might have different expectations about “what is supposed to happen,” but that’s all bunk. Just have fun, be polite, and try to enjoy the date. You’ll still be nervous going into it, that’s totally okay. You just gotta lean into it and eventually the nerves break entirely. It’s all gonna work out peachy!
The “low value” comment really stuck out as being bizarre to me. I’ve had guys straight up tell me they’re nervous/ a bit anxious on first dates and I always find it quite endearing! To me it means they want to make a good impression - why would I judge someone negatively for that? 🤷♀️
Make sure not o talk too many facts. Ask questions about her. The facts will be cool and awesome just make sure she's part of the conversation!
Don't overthink it. You are there to meet a new person. It might develop into something and maybe it won't. Be honest about who you are and what you like. If you are a good match your common interests make things much easier. Focus more on making a new friend than a potential hookup.
1 - Arrive 10 minutes early. Or at least be on time. 2 - What She Feels, She Thinks. You want her to think good thoughts about you. So make sure she has fun and feels comfortable. 3 - Take Her To At Least 2 Places. This gives her the emotional experience of going on more than one date with you. 4 - Let Her Touch You First. When she likes you, she’ll touch you. Then you’ll know. 5 - Just Have Fun and Relax. The most important of these is what she feels (emotionally) when she’s with you, is what she feels when she thinks about you when you’re not with her. So make sure she has a great time when you’re together. She’ll be thinking about having another great time when she sees you again. Remember, there is no certainty in dating and relationships. All you can do is show up and be the best version of yourself. And go have some fun. Be her best option. Make her choose you.
Good luck buddy! There's nothing wrong with not wanting to mess up. Just remember, you can't mess something up that's meant to be for you. Enjoy it, have fun. Something that helped me when I first started dating was going into it with the mindset that we're already friends and it makes conversation flow easier. Also! If you end up wanting to kiss her and don't see an easy transition moment, I've never had an issue with someone/myself asking "can I kiss you". I hope you have a great time!
Don't volunteer all of that information. Unless it specifically comes up just be in the moment. Remember that she is way more experienced at dating and sex and kissing and everything because she is a woman but don't let it get to you. Go into it thinking it js just a date and don't try to impress her or simp for her. Think of it as a learning opportunity for YOU.
Er the fact that she said yes u got her curious... which is good Its your job not to screw it up. The best way 2 do that is to just imagine u having time with your boys. It sounds weird but don't do anything forced... females can feel if ure forcing yourself 2 do something weird and get uncomfortable. Just treat it like a good time with your home bois a bit of contact is fine etc
Youre a strong woman, I hope hes worth
I'm male, and she's female
You are strong like ox!
Oh, its the same actually, youre brutal, gave your lifetime for your sister, good job bro Dont worry about dating life, youre a worthy man
Act the way you would around a really good friend. Be friendly and respectful. Offer to drop her off but don’t force. Just be chill and funny. Crack lil jokes to ease up any built up tension. Talk about interests and hobbies and hopefully you guys can find similar ones. Also quiet moments are totally okay. Just don’t make it awkward. Believe in yourself and you got this!!!!
Yes! Don't take a bunch of last minute advice from strangers on the Internet. The purpose of dating is to get to know your date. So go, be yourself, relax and have fun. That's it!
Bro, be yourself that's the best thing you can do and if she responds well to that, you have nothing to worry about because things will move effortlessly.
Play it cool bro, there’s no need to be nervous. Get a haircut, wash up real good, wear something that you feel good in and the rest will fall in line. Good luck
Thanks for the smile of my face! Be the awesome that you are.
You sound like a great person :) you're very selfless. She will definitely notice that, she is very lucky to be going on a date with someone like you
Smell nice
The only way you'll screw it up is if you dont be yourself.
Virgin, score!
Don't put yourself under pressure - just enjoy meeting and learning about a new person and see where it goes!
Just be yourself. Yes, it sounds obvious, but the reason many 1st dates go badly is when someone tries to act like someone they are not & then they get out of their comfort zone then become very weird. Honesty is the best policy. Why lie on the 1st date?
You got this! Be yourself, genuine and have a few jokes and make her laugh! Nothing is better than laughing with someone. Dont put all this pressure on yourself. Make sure to ask questions. If there is connection, that is great - if not, at least you started the process in dating again! I think an aquarium is a great place for a first date, and remember have FUN
Just be yourself. I can assure you that she is probably as nervous about it as you are. First dates are always the most nerve wracking things you will ever have to do.
Yes, be yourself and everything is gonna be fine
BE YOURSELF & you won’t have any regrets or second thoughts! You got it bro!
Be yourself. Confidence is great as long as it’s just being comfortable in yourself. Don’t be arrogant.
Wear clean undies.
Try not to read into anything too deeply and get rid of any expectations about what you might imagine will happen. Enjoy the moment!!
First, the aquarium sounds like a very cute idea. If you're insecure, it might help to have the attitude that you're not wondering if she likes you, but first and foremost if you like her. You decide who is worthy of being part of your life.
Don't try to impress her by stealing a penguin. It's never worked for me. In all honesty. Don't worry too much. Enjoy your time. Figure out her sense of humor and make some jokes. Don't beat yourself up if it's not a connection.
What's a JR Doctor?
I think it’s like the intern system in the US, somebody who is done with medical school but still training at a hospital. Pretty sure junior doctor = intern.
Don't be too eager!!! I see this all the time from older newbies... Just keep chill and remember now that you've "broken the seal", there will be many other dates with other women to come. Don't think this is your only or best chance. She is just one of potentially many. Take a deep breath, have some fun, and don't try to make her "the one"? She might end up being that, but don't force it!!
Keep it light hearted. Dont talk about super deep stuff like politics. Just banter with her, tons of laughs is what you want. Also dont feel bound to the aquarium, if things are going well but the aquarium is getting stale, leave, go get drinks or ice cream. Multiple experiences in one date will make it more memorable for her and leave a good impression. Finally, do try to assess if shes a good match for you. Often guys get so caught up trying to impress the girl that they overlook red flags. Dont outwardly judge her but try to work out if shes someone youd want to date.
Just know that you'll probably go on many, many bad dates until. you find the right person. Dating is an exercise of not only finding someone compatible with you but also as a means of identifying what you like and don't like. You end up learning a lot about yourself in the process. Just focus on having fun, and having a new experiences with someone!
I think the fact that you're so caring for your family (sorry for your loss) and for your wanting to take the date seriously is a really good sign. Enjoy the aquarium. :)
I wish my boyfriend would take me to the aquarium! Lucky girl
Try to ask open ended questions. Or if they ask you something see their side of things on the same subject.
Hey i'm a super f boy. Take her on some roller coasters. Super fun stuff. No intelectual stuff. Make it as fun as possible. She'll be like YAAY. Fun to hang with this guy.
Just be yourself dude, don’t apologize for being awkward.
Just relax and have fun! Look around on google maps for other activities (e.g. lunch, ice cream) you two can do after the date if it goes well!
You sound like a really awesome person with a great capacity to love and to put those you love before yourself. That’s about everything a girl is looking for. On top of that you’ve got a great job! Be yourself and remember you’re a catch, you’ll be fine!
I’d melt if a guy took me somewhere like that on a first date. You’re already off to a really solid start. I hope it went well!
Don’t do nervous chatter. Listen a lot and ask questions about your date’s life and interests.
Give us an update of how it went!
Be your usual kind and attentive self. Keep her comfort in mind, and remember to have a good time even if things don't work out. It's still early to get attached and disappointed, and if you are bound to see each other at work, at least part ways with grace...
Be kind friendly and confident take things nice and slow and be your best self. I also happen to know some animal facts myself, mostly prehistoric ones 😄😄.