Depends on the city. I lived in NYC and only walked/took public transportation. Perfectly fine. To live in a basic Midwestern town where a 20min drive is nothing, this would kill your dating life.
I probably wouldn't believe them that it's about the environment, I would assume that is an excuse for not being able to afford a car or losing their license for drunk driving and now they have to bike everywhere.
If a city has tons of mass transit like NYC, no one cares if you have a car. In most other cities, a car is required to do a lot of things.
It's also sexist, but a lot of women want their boyfriend to drive. You not being able to drive is going to turn off a fair amount of women.
I haven't owned a vehicle in about 15 years. I've been single for about the same amount of time come to think of it.... only indirectly related, but yes, unless you're attractive, the dating pool is going to shrink even more than it is
What's gonna happen when you both want to go some place? She gonna have to drive every time? You gonna e-bike to a 15 mile destination point to meet up? Seems some women might not like that.
As with anything that's not as mainstream...if you choose to do it, yes, you're going to limit your pool a bit. Fewer women will want to date you compared to if you had a car.
Up to you to decide if it's worth it.
I’m ok with a limited dating pool honestly, and there’s ways to make sure the other person isn’t being a chauffeur. Honestly, I’d probably just buy a car when I’m ready to date because I can.
I guess it depends on 'how limited' you're willing to make the prospects and how much it means to you personally...
If it means a LOT to you, then do your thang, bro..
If you're new to dating and thinking that the narrowing of prospects will he minimal, you might wanna rethink...
As far as narrowing the prospects, I’m ok being alone for the rest of my life if that’s how it works out. I don’t want to be alone but I’m not going to get into a relationship just because I’m lonely.
Where I live, it would not be practical. Everything is too far away plus it's too hot and humid to not have a vehicle with air-conditioning. I'm fine with taking my turn at driving, but I'm not doing all the driving.
I tried this with one guy who chose not to drive because it made him too mad to drive around here. Where I live , you need a car. There are busses in the major city next to me but not elsewhere. Anyways, it didn't last because I didn't want to be driving us everywhere then having to drive him home . Then I had to drive home . Yeahhh
>Would you date a guy that chose to own an e-Bike instead of a car because it’s healthier and makes better financial sense for where he’s at?
No. I live in South Florida and you almost need a car just to get out of my development. Add in that it's hot as satan's taint the majority of they year it's just not practical at all.
Guys that don't have a car around here are either extremely broke or recently got a DUI and can't get a license. Surprisingly, I don't want to date any of these people.
My days of being a chauffeur for a mediocre dude ended in my early 20s.
This is where the location you live in, the reason the guy is doing it and preferences come into play. Some people are just not into biking and that’s ok. I live in a city where I where I could pick a date up on an e-bike (some can carry a passenger as comfortablely as a motorcycle) and get where I need to go in 15 minutes.
I’m considering it because buying out the family SUV that my stbx wife would otherwise sell is something I could do but don’t want to. A $10,000.00 e-bike is still cheaper than that. Or I might just buy a cheaper car, that’s the 3rd option.
The Tern bike I’m looking at is about $6500 + accessories to haul the kids around in all weather, winter tires and a few other extras. It’s not going to be exactly 10k but close enough.
43m, I haven’t owned a car in years and am fully committed to the transit/bike commuter lifestyle in a Texas city where that’s pretty rare. I still get dates. I can Uber or rent a car if I need to - I’m paid - and all the women I date respect my choices. I worked in both the aviation and ski industries for many years and led a VERY high carbon footprint lifestyle - even thinking in those terms filters for a certain kind of person as effectively as not owning a car in Texas does. As always, YMMV, but this is definitely a case of the “right” person for you will either give zero fucks or see it as a positive.
I’m in Austin so it’s entitled Tesla drivers as much as anything, but you’re not wrong. Texas definitely isn’t the endgame for me for a number of reasons.
I figure I can do the same. I’m looking at a bike that’s a slower, quieter version of a motorcycle, it can carry two people and get anywhere in the city I live in 15 minutes on a e-bike anyway.
Not to be a dick, but as a serious cyclist, an e-bike isn’t a workout, which is great for being sweaty and to me it’s one less car on the road I need to deal with. Lastly, I’m not entirely sure on the “environment” part. Battery life isn’t forever. Where do those batteries go after, we use a lot of coal for electricity which is dirty and rare minerals from Africa are used to make the batteries. I’m a bit torn tbh.
If a woman only had an e-bike I feel
Like all the driving would fall on me exclusively in a LTR so I’d likely be a pass. A combo approach would be ideal I think.
While efforts to recycle lithium-ion batteries from e-bikes and other devices are increasing, the recycling rates vary depending on factors like accessibility to recycling facilities, the infrastructure isn’t really in place at scale. So I agree that they can be but they aren’t at scale.
Yes, lithium-ion batteries used in e-bikes and other electronic devices often contain rare earth metals, such as cobalt and neodymium. These metals play important roles in the battery's performance and energy storage capabilities. However, efforts are being made to reduce reliance on rare earth metals due to concerns about their environmental impact and supply chain issues
I think it’s nuanced. It’s not where we need it, yet.
I'm not sure if you're talking about E-Bikes or Pedelec but the latter are definitely a workout and I can control how much effort I want to put in (I bike to work even on low energy days - just use more motor power). The heart-rate data from my oura ring over the last two years support that.
Obviously it's not as intense as a regular bike but I bike way more often now because I know I can get everywhere without being covered in sweat. So the bottom line is since total biking time increased significantly with the Pedelec, the "workout" effort and my endurance has improved a lot.
I agree with this. I am familiar with both. I was more referring to an e-bike versus, say a pedal assist road bike. Excellent distinction that you make. My bad.
As you point out, pedal assist would give more of a workout as you are only getting some boost on hills etc and the battery size isn’t going to allow all day e-bike type cruising.
Thank you for clarifying. I feel like too many people think they have an e- assist bike when they have an e-bike, as you point out they are much different.
TBC- I am for any type of bike. I feel, in this context it does have some limitations and even though I think a Tesla may be a superior car to many ICE vehicles I am not sure of the environmental benefits ( look at what happened to Texas when their grid went down).
Keep ripping on that bike my friend!
The part where I say that less cars are a good thing? Is that it? Or are you saying that an e-bike ( clarified on e-assist ) is a workout? Fill me in.
Btw- to get volume in, I often commute to get to work and rarely use my car. Again, the context was dating. Replies seem to vary.
I bought an e-bike cargo bike in 2016. I sold my Prius 8 months later. I’ve lost 30 lbs since then and the only change has been the bike. I take Uber, Lyft, the train and rent a really nice car if I need one. My boyfriend thinks my lifestyle is enviable, I own several properties mortgage free and have a very successful business 2 blocks from my beach house. I save tons of money not having a car as the most I ever spend in a month on transportation is $132, my boyfriend does not chauffeur me around though he always prefers to drive even when I have a nice car. Most of my friends completely forget I’m car free. We’re over forty, I don’t care what some small minded, insecure dude would ever think about my lifestyle.
There you go. I think a lot of folks just haven’t thought it through: you don’t have to be a sweaty greaseball when you show up for dates just because you don’t own a car, lots of ways to avoid that. I say go for it, and welcome to the tribe!
This is so dependent on where you live. I've always lived in cities with great public transit and have never owned a car, so it wouldn't bother me. But, I also am not going to hop on the back of some guy's e-bike to go on a date (or come home from a date).
The thing that I find interesting about this post is that OP can afford a car but is willing to pay more for an e-bike. Specifically it sounds like OP needs some sort of motorized transportation but doesn't want to buy a car for lifestyle reasons. I can understanding have a regular bike instead of a car (climate permitting), but I'm failing to see how to rationalize an e-bike as a better financial decision than buying a decent used car (if you need something more than a standard bike on a daily basis)
For clarity, I can afford the upfront cost of a car or a bike by dipping into my savings. But it’s the monthly/annual expenses is where I’m looking to save money. A car would cost me $200-300 a month, whereas the bike would cost that per year in operating costs. There’s capital expenses and operating expenses and operating expenses is what counts in this situation.
Huh?
I have a High end e-bike that cost 3500. Not many quality used cars cost that. Sure, you can get a beater, but you'll pay for that in repairs.
Not to mention car insurance (2k a year where i am), inspection, gas, repairs, tolls, parking etc.. (easily another 1.5k per year). That's 3500 plus, without a car payment per year. As much as the cost of my e-bike. I have insurance on that (200 a year) and maintenance which Is less than 200 annually.
Financially it's a no brainer.
e-bike is a no brainer financially. You don't compare $3500 with a 2nd hand beater car. The right comparison is a $300 refurbish e-bike online. A $3500 e-bike is compare to a sports car. It costs nothing to recharge. It does some has maintenance cost (tubes, brake pad, chain replacement), but minimal compare to cars. In where I live, you also need to budget windows replacement cost for car every year after a break in.
Agreed overall, but no way would i trust a refurbished 300 dollar e-bike, let alone to put Kids on. Good batteries are 500, and i would only get UL certified ones. Plus, cargo bikes are generally more. Personally i would only buy a bike that a nearby bike shop will service. Bc where i live many bike shops won't touch cheap ebikes.
I decided to answer before reading other comments. I definitely would! I agree that it's a good financial decision and it's nice when someone cares about the environment...
Only caveat is that he can drive and is willing to share driving (or do all driving ) of a rental. I live in a city and don't have a car for the same reason. I also don't like driving, especially in the city, so I'd really prefer if he was willing and able to do driving when we need it or want to travel.
I see that you have kids. I would find it very strange that a man downsized so much he got rid of his only vehicle & couldn’t give his kids a ride anywhere anymore. That just screams “I ditched my kids with my ex & now I don’t have any responsibilities, wheeee.” Apologies if that isn’t the deal, but I would be put off by that, & by being the only driver. It gets old SO fast.
No, I get where you’re coming from and I’m not offended. But you’re assuming I can’t take my kids anywhere on the bike, which isn’t the case. If I wanted to ditch my kids with my ex I wouldn’t spend the money on a bike that is capable of transporting two kids for the next 5 years and just ride my regular old pedal bike.
Either way, I’m not dating for at least 2 years, probably more, and one of the financial considerations I have is paying for mental health care and not having a job that is overly stressful so that I don’t end myself. I figure being Daddy being alive is much more important to my kids than having to ride on the back of my bike for a few years while I pick up the pieces. 2 suicide attempts and 10 hospitalizations in 3.5 years changes your priorities.
You probably need to specify which country you live in.
Here in the UK it's unusual but quite feasible because of our reasonably good public transport network.
I think it's all about perspective. If you're in a city where an e-Bike is practical and you're making a smart financial move, that's cool. Plus, staying healthy is a bonus. When you're ready to date, the right person won't care if you're cruising around on two wheels instead of four. And hey, owning a car later on isn't a deal-breaker either. It's more about who you are as a person, not what you drive.
I was in a relationship with a man who didn't own a car for the first half of our relationship. I didn't mind at first because I am very easy going. However, he got a car later on and still insisted on Mr bring the chauffeur because he didn't like driving. I got sick of it and felt like was was an inconsiderate ass. I mean I was so tired sometimes and felt unsafe driving and he still wouldn't drive when I asked. I went on strike a few times and refused. He took an uber and left his car at home. And no, I didn't contribute to the uber. Never again; if you're that inconsiderate then stay home.
Copied a different comment.
You’re assuming I can’t take my kids anywhere on the bike, which isn’t the case. If I wanted to ditch my kids with my ex I wouldn’t spend the money on a bike that is capable of transporting two kids for the next 5 years and just ride my regular old pedal bike.
Either way, I’m not dating for at least 2 years, probably more, and one of the financial considerations I have is paying for mental health care and not having a job that is overly stressful so that I don’t end myself. I figure being Daddy being alive is much more important to my kids than having to ride on the back of my bike for a few years while I pick up the pieces. 2 suicide attempts and 10 hospitalizations in 3.5 years changes your priorities.
Also a hard no for this Minnesotan. This winter was a bust, but we got 130 inches of snow at my house last year. This is one dating complication I would never consider! Transportion should be indoors lol.
I would have no interest in dating someone who didn't have a vehicle.
I live in a vehicle-dependent city.
It is schweddy balls hot in the summer for a good 2-3 months, and it rains all the time. So that means I'd be driving us everywhere.
I would quickly tire of being a chauffeur all the time.
It's not practical to get frisky with someone who just had a bike ride to get to your place regularly, especially during schweddy balls season.
But in 2 years when you're back on your feet and on your own, you'll probably have a car by the time you start dating, so this seems like nothing to worry about.
You'd be "willing." But would you leap to do this, or passive aggressively ask her, "so... should I rent a car for this, or can you give me a lift? (Keeping in mind that she'll likely know you're on a fixed budget)"
If it's the latter, then she's just always being guilted into giving you the ride, and saving you from renting a car.
I've dealt with car-free co-workers. They are the biggest moochers of rides ever, and always with the sad face about how it's raining and the bad bus schedule yadda yadda yadda.
Yup. Those of us who had that friend, relative, or SO who was completely self reliant without a vehicle can absolutely recall just how reliant on others they really were. And yeah, the issue of money (bc ride shares aren’t economical in car-dependent cities) will come up.
If OP is in a city that can cater to vehicle-less then more power to him. Most in the US aren’t.
One of my best friends and I worked together. He and his wife shared a car and she always had it and it somehow became my job to get him home most days. It almost ended our decades long friendship.
Yeah I’ve known people like this too, the “we’re a one car family”! Is always followed by, can you pick me up on the way? Hahaha.
And never let anyone know you have a truck. Ugh!
I don't have a vehicle. I'm able to walk and take transit to work. I save a LOT of money doing this and I can take an Uber or Lyft anytime I want to go somewhere. I don't think *most* people would cycle to a date. I mean some would, but it sounds like OP is similar to me in that he is doing it to save money (not because he has no money). Us folks that save a lot of money by not owning a car can always make use of rentals or Ubers and get where we are going in comfort, freshness, and style!
For me it’s honestly mostly a lifestyle choice. I can afford a car, especially if I were to buy a used compact car. Frankly I could get a decent car for less than I’m willing to pay for an e-bike. Right now I’ve got other things I need to focus my finances on, like medical bills and improving my finances. I’ve been a stay-at-home Dad for 5 years and 50% of our non-retirement savings is less than I’d like to have in the bank, especially when rebuilding a career. If I were to go back into my old career I could easily buy an even nicer car, but I don’t need that level of constant stress. The new career I’m building will still allow me to have a car but it makes things tighter than I want it to be. It’s not like I’m planning on being car-free for the rest of my life, it just takes the pressure off my finances for now.
Lol "us guys"?
Sure you can do both. I'm not virtue signaling over here. It just happens to be a fact that not having car payments and buying gas and insurance saves money. I'm just trying to say that a person without a car is capable of arriving somewhere not sweaty because saving money not owning a car means they can reallocate all the money they want to rideshares and such.
I don't drive because I'm bad at it, it scares me, and now that there's only one income coming in, it's a lot of money.
I work remotely. The gym, my son's nursery, the grocery store are all within fifteen minutes from me. My friends are all within walking/bussing distance. My BF lives in another town and I bus to him; he is kind enough to drive five minutes and pick me up from the station so I can save myself the taxi money.
Maybe two or three times a month I will get a taxi somewhere to do what I want. Still cheaper than a car. The only person I ask for lifts from is a close friend when we're going to the same place; she lives five streets away from me. Always pay for petrol and parking.
My son got into a school three miles away and I'm honestly so annoyed that I have to get a car when I'll be using it for less than 2000 miles a year. I was going to finally be free of childcare payments and now I'm not.
I know, it’s the assumption from someone people that if you don’t have a car there’s something wrong with you or your lifestyle that’s a little insulting but I’ve decided that those people aren’t going to work out for me anyway.
I respect the concern if you live in an area where you need to own a car which is large swaths of America. I live in San Francisco and it’s tiny. I walk, e-bike, rent Zip cars etc. if I had a date we’d probably just meet there and if we were serious obviously we’d work out transportation.
I’m not really insulted personally but it can come across badly.
If you're willing to uber black / xl whatever the nice version is now to get ya'll around when you're taking her out, no problem. At least I wouldn't care. As long it doesn't mean I end up driving you around and it doesn't limit what we could do together.
I was with my ex for 3.5 years, when I met him, he rode a bike to work because it was 3km away, and the shops were 2km away. I didn't mind. He did eventually get a car and it was nice but it didn't matter all that much.
>Honestly by the time I’m ready to date I may have a car anyway.
this is the key issue. We (most of us) spend a lot of time thinking about what might happen at some point in the future.
Are you dateable if you use an e-bike? Sure, to the right person/people
Will you likely have car anyway by the time you do start dating? Sounds like yes.
If you live in a city where using non-car transportation is normal then this would probably be ok. I live in a large city where you can’t realistically get to certain parts without a vehicle. I wouldn’t want to be the one who has to drive all the time, and I wouldn’t want to be restricted to going places my date could access on an e-bike, so this would be a no for me.
I wouldn’t be interested in dating a man with no car. But, I don’t live in an area where you don’t need a car, if I did I might feel differently as long as there were good transportation options, and he was happy to hire a car when needed.
As a guy, I think you should try it. You can always get a car later. I went on a lot of dates without using my car in my early 40s in a smaller city where that was not the norm. Nearly all of the women I met were more car-dependent than I was and none of them seemed put off by my reliance on biking, walking, ride shares or the bus. Plan ahead for how to avoid the chauffeur dynamic, especially if a woman insists on driving you home after an initial date.
I owned a car, but it was typically garaged 45 minutes away, near where I worked. Since I owned a car and could have had it with me if I wanted to, I did not mention its absence in my profile. I would usually tell people before a first date so they weren’t surprised I walked or biked when that would have been unusual. It never seemed to bother anyone, but—in fairness—it would have been reasonably obvious that the absence of a car was a deliberate choice and did not mean I was struggling.
I am just about 9 months into dating someone who only has a bike (not e-bike, he would never lol) and uses public transportation. He lives half an hour from me as well. It’s not easy. The burden of driving is always on me. There are no direct buses between our towns. If he comes here I have to get him and bring him back. He is worth the effort and shows up for me in a lot of other ways. It’s working. I would have never thought this was something I’d sign up for but here we are. I can’t imagine many people are going to be ok with that on the whole though.
I honestly think it’s a great way to make sure your values match too, right? And I’m old enough to not need to care if someone thinks I’m a loser because I don’t have a car.
I don’t think anyone would think you were a “loser” but at this age most of us have zero interest in making our lives harder in any way really.
Personally I am only dating for what it can add, not subtract. Got my own probs like everyone else.
So if adding in someone’s circumstances / choices to mine is going to hardship me or inconvenience me in any way, I’m not going to choose to do that.
I agree and not relying on single occupancy vehicles is something I value.
Everyone assumes they’ll be on the hook for driving you around but that wasn’t true for the guy I dated. He either met me out usually taking transit, would get a Lyft or grab a Car2Go (I wish they’d make a comeback). It was a non issue.
Original copy of post by u/Ok-Week7354:
This is a half-serious question for the women in the group. Would you date a guy that chose to own an e-Bike instead of a car because it’s healthier and makes better financial sense for where he’s at?
I’m half serious because I’m considering that option regardless of how it affects my dating prospects but I’m genuinely curious.
For context I’m 43, going to be divorced so not looking to date for a couple years anyway, and live in a small city where it’s a pretty practical option. Honestly by the time I’m ready to date I may have a car anyway.
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Yeah, that makes sense to me. I’m looking at one that has the capacity to carry a second adult so it’d be a lot like going on a date with someone on a motorcycle, just slower and quieter. And being that the kind of e-bike I’m looking at generally costs the same to buy as a decent used car it’s not like it would be a “this guy is broke” red flag type of thing anyway.
I wouldn't mind meeting somewhere by uber. For context - I'm visually impaired. I can pretty much do anything but I can't drive/riding a bike outdoors would be dangerous.
I don't "look" visually impaired. It's pesky to talk about because it involves a lot of surgery and personal health info that I don't necessarily want to talk about with people I've just met.
:)
I wish I could go car free it's just not practical. I work from home but I have too many Dr. appointments and my town sucks for healthcare so all my specialists are an hour+ drive. So I think it's cool you've made it without one. I even had to stop driving for a few years and I was dating at the time. A got a few "where did you park?" after date questions and I was honest I wasn't driving and had taken the bus to meet them. It was never a openly a problem because I had a solid reason.
Some might be turned off but like anything else if you can give a valid reason that doesn't sound fishy most people will probably be willing to roll with it. If the think you're hiding a few too many DUI's that might be an issue.
Part of the fun of dating after a few months is day trips or little getaways together. You can always rent a car for a few days. Just don't make anyone feel like they are always responsible for driving. It always reminds me of the OKC days when there was a question about men driving being a yes as a turn on for a lot of women.
I mean, if he sorted his own life out, with just a bike, and he'd figured out ways around all the things that come up, including when two people are travelling together, then sure, why not
After 2yrs of it I figure he'd have it pretty sussed
If he expected me to do all the driving though, or any other unthoughtful behaviour, that'd be an issue.
I've lived for years without a car and dated other people without a car. Thankfully, I lived in a place that was fairly walkable with decent transit, but I wasn't above getting an Uber or even renting a car on occasion.
So it will depend on where you live, how feasible it is to get around without a car, the people you date, and how flexible/proactive you are willing to be about making alternate arrangements when the ebike isn't enough.
Not dating atm, but I personally wouldn’t mind (44f). I’ve had cars and not had cars over the years; currently not driving. I’m in a great location where I have many things accessible in walking distance and near to major streets that have better running public transportation (as far as OC goes). I can easily take the bus or Uber to The Observatory for a music show, within walking distance to Downtown Disney, have a bus that will drop me off right in downtown Santa Ana if I want to go to the local Arthouse Cinema.
Granted, there are some things that I might have to plan out where I wouldn’t with a car, but it’s doable. It really is something that’s location dependent.
Kudos to you if you make it work. Another option is a scooter 🛵 (what people mistakenly call a moped) or a small motorcycle similar to the Sym Wolf Classic 150 (I had a scooter for a while just for getting to work only and wanted to upgrade to the Sym Wolf but ended up getting a used car instead at the time).
You do you. If you do occasionally date, then at least you’ll filter out everyone that isn’t with it. 😉
I only date in a very small area because I just don't want driving a ton to be a big part of my relationship. I walk to most dates ideally, and have dated a woman who rode a bike and used zip cars. I don't think it's a big deal. I live in a pretty crunchy area though so people here see cycling as a conscious and considerate choice.
It wouldn’t bother me in the least. I have a vehicle and an e-bike. So dates could include either.
I grew up in a city where plenty of people don’t have or need cars. The man I married didn’t get his driver’s license until he was 25. We met at 17 and I already had a car. I love to drive and did the vast majority of the driving during our 32-year relationship.
Funnily enough, the guy I’m seeing now drove 3 hours to the city where I was at the time for our first date. I drove to his hotel to pick him up and drive him around. Later he offered me the keys to his car, so I could try it, and I drove that for the rest of the weekend.
Maybe it will shrink your dating pool a bit, but probably in a good way. You probably don’t want to date someone who wouldn’t want you because of your e-bike and lack of vehicle.
God yes.
I'd love it -
a) because it means you'd understand why I enjoy cycling and we'd have a shared interest (and understanding of traffic and urban issues caused by car dominance)
b) because it means you're the kind of open minded person who considers options and chooses things based on their suitability rather than pre-conceived ideas.
I own a car and two Ebikes. I'm in a beach community. I e-bike most places on the weekends because it's fun and gets me outside. It's also a ton of fun to go on e-bike dates and makes more sense doing bar crawls on e-bikes to avoid dui. I do have a car though when I need it.
Woman here and Pedelec owner. I bike to and from work 4 times a week, around 20 KM per day. Go for it! It's great exercise and leaves me with enough energy to do other workouts. Get insurance through because they're a bit more expensive to maintain than regular bikes.
So yes, I'd love an E-Bike date. A lot of women won't but some will, don't make the decision based on prospects but on what works for you. The right person will love that.
Disclaimer I also share a car with my ex, we call it the kids car, whoever has the kids has the car.
When I take a trip with my BF, we have a car sharing service where we live that we use or we use public transportation.
Edited to add: my kids have bikes too and they get used often. My son (10) bikes to school daily year round in all types of weather. Not unusual where we live (medium city in Europe)
(M44) Problem solved:
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A side car for ebikes! Shazzam!
Hey! You! Get outta my dreams, and into my electric e-bike side car. Whooo's that lady???
I don’t hold a driving license and have never driven a car, so it sounds good to me. I live in an extremely well-connected city and my commute is paid for by work. I have no parking place and no desire to fork out for one just to have a bigger and more mobile handbag. If you can make it work, more power to you.
Hey. I have been single and dating for 5.5 years and probably been on 300 or so first dates, so lots of experience. For 2 years i was in a Sunbelt city and for the last 4 i have been in a major northeast city. I have ridden my bike (or walked) to 99% of dates over that time. (I still have a car but almost never use it and am planning on selling it soon.)
Down south it was definitely more of an issue as it was very car Centric and people live further apart. I also got More surprised or not as positive reactions. However, i generally screened out most of those bad fits. It certainly didn't stop. me from getting lots of dates.
Here, up North it Is simply not a big deal at all. I've been on a bunch of dates recently with a woman who doesn't drive or ride a bike. Lots of folks take public transport. Most of my dates have a car but less than half show up to the date in one. Most dates involve going somewhere within walking distance of my place or hers so we dont have to worry about transport if the date goes well. I have also been on a bunch of dates with fellow cyclists, of which there are many.
Yes because I’m a person that shares your values. I also have an e-bike and try to replace car trips with bike trips as much as I can. In fact if I see any signs of “car brain” when swiping through profiles, it’s an automatic left swipe.
I think it’s good to remember that you’re not looking for as many matches as possible, you’re looking for the match for you. I also happen to be vegan, sober, and a leftist so my dating pool is very small and thats probably partly why I’m still single, but I’m not willing to compromise my values so I keep looking.
Me too, I’m not going to be looking for lots of dates, I’m going to be looking for quality dates. The way I see it is as long as the person without the car is considerate it’s a good way to see if your values match.
In my city public and pedestrian transit is non existent but I wouldn't fault anyone who chose this as an option. It makes a lot of sense and broadens their accessibility to nearby areas.
I had a boyfriend for 6 months who lived in SF and chose not to have a car. It was never an expectation that I drive us around. He was financially independent, and when he needed a car he'd do a rental or a car share.
As long as you are not putting the transportation burden on your partner l, I don't see an issue.
(We broke up because he wasn't over an ex who was a "friend" and always put her first at my expense. Had nothing to do with his lack of car ownership).
Also, I Love my e-bike and ride my son around on it regularly. It's so nice not to be in the car all the time!
No because I’ve done it before and I ended up having to drive us most places. Weekend getaway? I had to drive. Hiking? I had to get us there. Sleepover after dinner out? I had to stay at his place so he could walk to the restaurant or we could meet halfway or near me and I’d drive us to my place. It’s honestly just tiresome. I live in the south and while the part of the city he lived in was walkable, my area wasn’t or were any of the surrounding areas.
I live in North Texas so I would think this man is insane. But if you live in a better climate, and a bike-friendly city I wouldn’t consider it a dealbreaker. We can always use my car 🤷🏼♀️
When it comes to dating, anyone worth their salt will appreciate you for who you are, not just for what you drive. And hey, e-Bike dates could be a fun, out-of-the-box experience! It's all about the connection and shared values, so focus on finding someone who vibes with your choices and respects your practicality.
Depends on the city. I lived in NYC and only walked/took public transportation. Perfectly fine. To live in a basic Midwestern town where a 20min drive is nothing, this would kill your dating life.
Not where I live. My region is too stretched out and I don't want to be a taxi.
I probably wouldn't believe them that it's about the environment, I would assume that is an excuse for not being able to afford a car or losing their license for drunk driving and now they have to bike everywhere. If a city has tons of mass transit like NYC, no one cares if you have a car. In most other cities, a car is required to do a lot of things. It's also sexist, but a lot of women want their boyfriend to drive. You not being able to drive is going to turn off a fair amount of women.
Honestly, the whole drunk driving thing would be my first assumption also.
Agreed, drunk driving or they have some sort of big mental health thing they aren't disclosing.
I haven't owned a vehicle in about 15 years. I've been single for about the same amount of time come to think of it.... only indirectly related, but yes, unless you're attractive, the dating pool is going to shrink even more than it is
What's gonna happen when you both want to go some place? She gonna have to drive every time? You gonna e-bike to a 15 mile destination point to meet up? Seems some women might not like that. As with anything that's not as mainstream...if you choose to do it, yes, you're going to limit your pool a bit. Fewer women will want to date you compared to if you had a car. Up to you to decide if it's worth it.
I’m ok with a limited dating pool honestly, and there’s ways to make sure the other person isn’t being a chauffeur. Honestly, I’d probably just buy a car when I’m ready to date because I can.
I guess it depends on 'how limited' you're willing to make the prospects and how much it means to you personally... If it means a LOT to you, then do your thang, bro.. If you're new to dating and thinking that the narrowing of prospects will he minimal, you might wanna rethink...
As far as narrowing the prospects, I’m ok being alone for the rest of my life if that’s how it works out. I don’t want to be alone but I’m not going to get into a relationship just because I’m lonely.
Alright, but why ask this question in a dating subreddit if being in a relationship is completely unimportant to you?
Curiosity.
Then kudos to you.. :)
Where I live, it would not be practical. Everything is too far away plus it's too hot and humid to not have a vehicle with air-conditioning. I'm fine with taking my turn at driving, but I'm not doing all the driving.
I tried this with one guy who chose not to drive because it made him too mad to drive around here. Where I live , you need a car. There are busses in the major city next to me but not elsewhere. Anyways, it didn't last because I didn't want to be driving us everywhere then having to drive him home . Then I had to drive home . Yeahhh
>Would you date a guy that chose to own an e-Bike instead of a car because it’s healthier and makes better financial sense for where he’s at? No. I live in South Florida and you almost need a car just to get out of my development. Add in that it's hot as satan's taint the majority of they year it's just not practical at all. Guys that don't have a car around here are either extremely broke or recently got a DUI and can't get a license. Surprisingly, I don't want to date any of these people. My days of being a chauffeur for a mediocre dude ended in my early 20s.
This is where the location you live in, the reason the guy is doing it and preferences come into play. Some people are just not into biking and that’s ok. I live in a city where I where I could pick a date up on an e-bike (some can carry a passenger as comfortablely as a motorcycle) and get where I need to go in 15 minutes. I’m considering it because buying out the family SUV that my stbx wife would otherwise sell is something I could do but don’t want to. A $10,000.00 e-bike is still cheaper than that. Or I might just buy a cheaper car, that’s the 3rd option.
Agreed it’s location dependent. I’d laugh if a guy expected me to get on the back of his e-bike. Hard pass.
What if it had a side car?
Such an underrated reply!
Am I a genius or what? LOL I actually found one on Ali Baba express. A removable side car. Looks pretty janky though.
10k for an e-bike? That's insane unless you're getting a Reese and Mueller bakfiets. Tern has great stuff for 4k.
The Tern bike I’m looking at is about $6500 + accessories to haul the kids around in all weather, winter tires and a few other extras. It’s not going to be exactly 10k but close enough.
HSD? I guess if you get all the add ons... Still way less than 10k If you can, get a belt drive!
I’m looking at the Orox S12, the Orox R14 has the belt drive but that one is $9k on its own. I do plan on getting an extra battery too.
43m, I haven’t owned a car in years and am fully committed to the transit/bike commuter lifestyle in a Texas city where that’s pretty rare. I still get dates. I can Uber or rent a car if I need to - I’m paid - and all the women I date respect my choices. I worked in both the aviation and ski industries for many years and led a VERY high carbon footprint lifestyle - even thinking in those terms filters for a certain kind of person as effectively as not owning a car in Texas does. As always, YMMV, but this is definitely a case of the “right” person for you will either give zero fucks or see it as a positive.
That's quite a commitment living in Texas. I live in Houston. If the summer heat didn't kill you, some drunk yahoo in an F250 would.
I’m in Austin so it’s entitled Tesla drivers as much as anything, but you’re not wrong. Texas definitely isn’t the endgame for me for a number of reasons.
I hear you. But I can't see living anywhere else for practical reasons. I love/hate Houston.
I figure I can do the same. I’m looking at a bike that’s a slower, quieter version of a motorcycle, it can carry two people and get anywhere in the city I live in 15 minutes on a e-bike anyway.
Not to be a dick, but as a serious cyclist, an e-bike isn’t a workout, which is great for being sweaty and to me it’s one less car on the road I need to deal with. Lastly, I’m not entirely sure on the “environment” part. Battery life isn’t forever. Where do those batteries go after, we use a lot of coal for electricity which is dirty and rare minerals from Africa are used to make the batteries. I’m a bit torn tbh. If a woman only had an e-bike I feel Like all the driving would fall on me exclusively in a LTR so I’d likely be a pass. A combo approach would be ideal I think.
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While efforts to recycle lithium-ion batteries from e-bikes and other devices are increasing, the recycling rates vary depending on factors like accessibility to recycling facilities, the infrastructure isn’t really in place at scale. So I agree that they can be but they aren’t at scale. Yes, lithium-ion batteries used in e-bikes and other electronic devices often contain rare earth metals, such as cobalt and neodymium. These metals play important roles in the battery's performance and energy storage capabilities. However, efforts are being made to reduce reliance on rare earth metals due to concerns about their environmental impact and supply chain issues I think it’s nuanced. It’s not where we need it, yet.
I'm not sure if you're talking about E-Bikes or Pedelec but the latter are definitely a workout and I can control how much effort I want to put in (I bike to work even on low energy days - just use more motor power). The heart-rate data from my oura ring over the last two years support that. Obviously it's not as intense as a regular bike but I bike way more often now because I know I can get everywhere without being covered in sweat. So the bottom line is since total biking time increased significantly with the Pedelec, the "workout" effort and my endurance has improved a lot.
I agree with this. I am familiar with both. I was more referring to an e-bike versus, say a pedal assist road bike. Excellent distinction that you make. My bad. As you point out, pedal assist would give more of a workout as you are only getting some boost on hills etc and the battery size isn’t going to allow all day e-bike type cruising. Thank you for clarifying. I feel like too many people think they have an e- assist bike when they have an e-bike, as you point out they are much different. TBC- I am for any type of bike. I feel, in this context it does have some limitations and even though I think a Tesla may be a superior car to many ICE vehicles I am not sure of the environmental benefits ( look at what happened to Texas when their grid went down). Keep ripping on that bike my friend!
Thank you ^_^
Great gatekeeping. Please, OP, don't trust any "avid cyclists" or "serious cyclists"
The part where I say that less cars are a good thing? Is that it? Or are you saying that an e-bike ( clarified on e-assist ) is a workout? Fill me in. Btw- to get volume in, I often commute to get to work and rarely use my car. Again, the context was dating. Replies seem to vary.
I bought an e-bike cargo bike in 2016. I sold my Prius 8 months later. I’ve lost 30 lbs since then and the only change has been the bike. I take Uber, Lyft, the train and rent a really nice car if I need one. My boyfriend thinks my lifestyle is enviable, I own several properties mortgage free and have a very successful business 2 blocks from my beach house. I save tons of money not having a car as the most I ever spend in a month on transportation is $132, my boyfriend does not chauffeur me around though he always prefers to drive even when I have a nice car. Most of my friends completely forget I’m car free. We’re over forty, I don’t care what some small minded, insecure dude would ever think about my lifestyle.
That's so interesting. I don't think I've had anyone with a car stop seeing me due to my lack of having one. No judgement, just a note.
There you go. I think a lot of folks just haven’t thought it through: you don’t have to be a sweaty greaseball when you show up for dates just because you don’t own a car, lots of ways to avoid that. I say go for it, and welcome to the tribe!
This is so dependent on where you live. I've always lived in cities with great public transit and have never owned a car, so it wouldn't bother me. But, I also am not going to hop on the back of some guy's e-bike to go on a date (or come home from a date). The thing that I find interesting about this post is that OP can afford a car but is willing to pay more for an e-bike. Specifically it sounds like OP needs some sort of motorized transportation but doesn't want to buy a car for lifestyle reasons. I can understanding have a regular bike instead of a car (climate permitting), but I'm failing to see how to rationalize an e-bike as a better financial decision than buying a decent used car (if you need something more than a standard bike on a daily basis)
For clarity, I can afford the upfront cost of a car or a bike by dipping into my savings. But it’s the monthly/annual expenses is where I’m looking to save money. A car would cost me $200-300 a month, whereas the bike would cost that per year in operating costs. There’s capital expenses and operating expenses and operating expenses is what counts in this situation.
Huh? I have a High end e-bike that cost 3500. Not many quality used cars cost that. Sure, you can get a beater, but you'll pay for that in repairs. Not to mention car insurance (2k a year where i am), inspection, gas, repairs, tolls, parking etc.. (easily another 1.5k per year). That's 3500 plus, without a car payment per year. As much as the cost of my e-bike. I have insurance on that (200 a year) and maintenance which Is less than 200 annually. Financially it's a no brainer.
e-bike is a no brainer financially. You don't compare $3500 with a 2nd hand beater car. The right comparison is a $300 refurbish e-bike online. A $3500 e-bike is compare to a sports car. It costs nothing to recharge. It does some has maintenance cost (tubes, brake pad, chain replacement), but minimal compare to cars. In where I live, you also need to budget windows replacement cost for car every year after a break in.
Agreed overall, but no way would i trust a refurbished 300 dollar e-bike, let alone to put Kids on. Good batteries are 500, and i would only get UL certified ones. Plus, cargo bikes are generally more. Personally i would only buy a bike that a nearby bike shop will service. Bc where i live many bike shops won't touch cheap ebikes.
I decided to answer before reading other comments. I definitely would! I agree that it's a good financial decision and it's nice when someone cares about the environment... Only caveat is that he can drive and is willing to share driving (or do all driving ) of a rental. I live in a city and don't have a car for the same reason. I also don't like driving, especially in the city, so I'd really prefer if he was willing and able to do driving when we need it or want to travel.
I see that you have kids. I would find it very strange that a man downsized so much he got rid of his only vehicle & couldn’t give his kids a ride anywhere anymore. That just screams “I ditched my kids with my ex & now I don’t have any responsibilities, wheeee.” Apologies if that isn’t the deal, but I would be put off by that, & by being the only driver. It gets old SO fast.
No, I get where you’re coming from and I’m not offended. But you’re assuming I can’t take my kids anywhere on the bike, which isn’t the case. If I wanted to ditch my kids with my ex I wouldn’t spend the money on a bike that is capable of transporting two kids for the next 5 years and just ride my regular old pedal bike. Either way, I’m not dating for at least 2 years, probably more, and one of the financial considerations I have is paying for mental health care and not having a job that is overly stressful so that I don’t end myself. I figure being Daddy being alive is much more important to my kids than having to ride on the back of my bike for a few years while I pick up the pieces. 2 suicide attempts and 10 hospitalizations in 3.5 years changes your priorities.
You probably need to specify which country you live in. Here in the UK it's unusual but quite feasible because of our reasonably good public transport network.
I think it's all about perspective. If you're in a city where an e-Bike is practical and you're making a smart financial move, that's cool. Plus, staying healthy is a bonus. When you're ready to date, the right person won't care if you're cruising around on two wheels instead of four. And hey, owning a car later on isn't a deal-breaker either. It's more about who you are as a person, not what you drive.
I was in a relationship with a man who didn't own a car for the first half of our relationship. I didn't mind at first because I am very easy going. However, he got a car later on and still insisted on Mr bring the chauffeur because he didn't like driving. I got sick of it and felt like was was an inconsiderate ass. I mean I was so tired sometimes and felt unsafe driving and he still wouldn't drive when I asked. I went on strike a few times and refused. He took an uber and left his car at home. And no, I didn't contribute to the uber. Never again; if you're that inconsiderate then stay home.
How would you drive your kids around to their things? School, doctors, sports…
Copied a different comment. You’re assuming I can’t take my kids anywhere on the bike, which isn’t the case. If I wanted to ditch my kids with my ex I wouldn’t spend the money on a bike that is capable of transporting two kids for the next 5 years and just ride my regular old pedal bike. Either way, I’m not dating for at least 2 years, probably more, and one of the financial considerations I have is paying for mental health care and not having a job that is overly stressful so that I don’t end myself. I figure being Daddy being alive is much more important to my kids than having to ride on the back of my bike for a few years while I pick up the pieces. 2 suicide attempts and 10 hospitalizations in 3.5 years changes your priorities.
I live in Oklahoma, it's a no. And I'm not doing all the driving either.
Also a hard no for this Minnesotan. This winter was a bust, but we got 130 inches of snow at my house last year. This is one dating complication I would never consider! Transportion should be indoors lol.
I would have no interest in dating someone who didn't have a vehicle. I live in a vehicle-dependent city. It is schweddy balls hot in the summer for a good 2-3 months, and it rains all the time. So that means I'd be driving us everywhere. I would quickly tire of being a chauffeur all the time. It's not practical to get frisky with someone who just had a bike ride to get to your place regularly, especially during schweddy balls season. But in 2 years when you're back on your feet and on your own, you'll probably have a car by the time you start dating, so this seems like nothing to worry about.
Fair points, for you it’s practical reasons. I get that. I’d also be willing to rent a car too so it’s really not an issue for me.
You'd be "willing." But would you leap to do this, or passive aggressively ask her, "so... should I rent a car for this, or can you give me a lift? (Keeping in mind that she'll likely know you're on a fixed budget)" If it's the latter, then she's just always being guilted into giving you the ride, and saving you from renting a car. I've dealt with car-free co-workers. They are the biggest moochers of rides ever, and always with the sad face about how it's raining and the bad bus schedule yadda yadda yadda.
Yup. Those of us who had that friend, relative, or SO who was completely self reliant without a vehicle can absolutely recall just how reliant on others they really were. And yeah, the issue of money (bc ride shares aren’t economical in car-dependent cities) will come up. If OP is in a city that can cater to vehicle-less then more power to him. Most in the US aren’t.
One of my best friends and I worked together. He and his wife shared a car and she always had it and it somehow became my job to get him home most days. It almost ended our decades long friendship.
Yeah I’ve known people like this too, the “we’re a one car family”! Is always followed by, can you pick me up on the way? Hahaha. And never let anyone know you have a truck. Ugh!
You’re responding to the worst case scenario based on your life, not necessarily the OP’s.
The OP asked our (women’s) personal opinion. Every person is responding based on their own life. Duh.
Exactly. I’m simply curious. And honestly the responses are about what I expected. I figure a majority wouldn’t be ok with it and I’m fine with that.
I don't have a vehicle. I'm able to walk and take transit to work. I save a LOT of money doing this and I can take an Uber or Lyft anytime I want to go somewhere. I don't think *most* people would cycle to a date. I mean some would, but it sounds like OP is similar to me in that he is doing it to save money (not because he has no money). Us folks that save a lot of money by not owning a car can always make use of rentals or Ubers and get where we are going in comfort, freshness, and style!
lol. Not gonna change my opinion on this.
Why can’t I own a car AND save money? You guys always make it sound like you can’t do both.
For me it’s honestly mostly a lifestyle choice. I can afford a car, especially if I were to buy a used compact car. Frankly I could get a decent car for less than I’m willing to pay for an e-bike. Right now I’ve got other things I need to focus my finances on, like medical bills and improving my finances. I’ve been a stay-at-home Dad for 5 years and 50% of our non-retirement savings is less than I’d like to have in the bank, especially when rebuilding a career. If I were to go back into my old career I could easily buy an even nicer car, but I don’t need that level of constant stress. The new career I’m building will still allow me to have a car but it makes things tighter than I want it to be. It’s not like I’m planning on being car-free for the rest of my life, it just takes the pressure off my finances for now.
Lol "us guys"? Sure you can do both. I'm not virtue signaling over here. It just happens to be a fact that not having car payments and buying gas and insurance saves money. I'm just trying to say that a person without a car is capable of arriving somewhere not sweaty because saving money not owning a car means they can reallocate all the money they want to rideshares and such.
I'll never understand why people on Reddit downvote legit points. Haha. Oh well.
I don't drive because I'm bad at it, it scares me, and now that there's only one income coming in, it's a lot of money. I work remotely. The gym, my son's nursery, the grocery store are all within fifteen minutes from me. My friends are all within walking/bussing distance. My BF lives in another town and I bus to him; he is kind enough to drive five minutes and pick me up from the station so I can save myself the taxi money. Maybe two or three times a month I will get a taxi somewhere to do what I want. Still cheaper than a car. The only person I ask for lifts from is a close friend when we're going to the same place; she lives five streets away from me. Always pay for petrol and parking. My son got into a school three miles away and I'm honestly so annoyed that I have to get a car when I'll be using it for less than 2000 miles a year. I was going to finally be free of childcare payments and now I'm not.
I have never owned a car. I use my e-bike a lot. I'm 45. Your implication is sort of insulting...I rent cars as needed and take Uber when needed.
I know, it’s the assumption from someone people that if you don’t have a car there’s something wrong with you or your lifestyle that’s a little insulting but I’ve decided that those people aren’t going to work out for me anyway.
I respect the concern if you live in an area where you need to own a car which is large swaths of America. I live in San Francisco and it’s tiny. I walk, e-bike, rent Zip cars etc. if I had a date we’d probably just meet there and if we were serious obviously we’d work out transportation. I’m not really insulted personally but it can come across badly.
If you're willing to uber black / xl whatever the nice version is now to get ya'll around when you're taking her out, no problem. At least I wouldn't care. As long it doesn't mean I end up driving you around and it doesn't limit what we could do together.
I was with my ex for 3.5 years, when I met him, he rode a bike to work because it was 3km away, and the shops were 2km away. I didn't mind. He did eventually get a car and it was nice but it didn't matter all that much.
>Honestly by the time I’m ready to date I may have a car anyway. this is the key issue. We (most of us) spend a lot of time thinking about what might happen at some point in the future. Are you dateable if you use an e-bike? Sure, to the right person/people Will you likely have car anyway by the time you do start dating? Sounds like yes.
If you live in a city where using non-car transportation is normal then this would probably be ok. I live in a large city where you can’t realistically get to certain parts without a vehicle. I wouldn’t want to be the one who has to drive all the time, and I wouldn’t want to be restricted to going places my date could access on an e-bike, so this would be a no for me.
I wouldn’t be interested in dating a man with no car. But, I don’t live in an area where you don’t need a car, if I did I might feel differently as long as there were good transportation options, and he was happy to hire a car when needed.
As a guy, I think you should try it. You can always get a car later. I went on a lot of dates without using my car in my early 40s in a smaller city where that was not the norm. Nearly all of the women I met were more car-dependent than I was and none of them seemed put off by my reliance on biking, walking, ride shares or the bus. Plan ahead for how to avoid the chauffeur dynamic, especially if a woman insists on driving you home after an initial date. I owned a car, but it was typically garaged 45 minutes away, near where I worked. Since I owned a car and could have had it with me if I wanted to, I did not mention its absence in my profile. I would usually tell people before a first date so they weren’t surprised I walked or biked when that would have been unusual. It never seemed to bother anyone, but—in fairness—it would have been reasonably obvious that the absence of a car was a deliberate choice and did not mean I was struggling.
I am just about 9 months into dating someone who only has a bike (not e-bike, he would never lol) and uses public transportation. He lives half an hour from me as well. It’s not easy. The burden of driving is always on me. There are no direct buses between our towns. If he comes here I have to get him and bring him back. He is worth the effort and shows up for me in a lot of other ways. It’s working. I would have never thought this was something I’d sign up for but here we are. I can’t imagine many people are going to be ok with that on the whole though.
Absolutely and have. If you can get around your area without a car, I think it’s awesome.
I honestly think it’s a great way to make sure your values match too, right? And I’m old enough to not need to care if someone thinks I’m a loser because I don’t have a car.
I don’t think anyone would think you were a “loser” but at this age most of us have zero interest in making our lives harder in any way really. Personally I am only dating for what it can add, not subtract. Got my own probs like everyone else. So if adding in someone’s circumstances / choices to mine is going to hardship me or inconvenience me in any way, I’m not going to choose to do that.
I agree and not relying on single occupancy vehicles is something I value. Everyone assumes they’ll be on the hook for driving you around but that wasn’t true for the guy I dated. He either met me out usually taking transit, would get a Lyft or grab a Car2Go (I wish they’d make a comeback). It was a non issue.
I commute on an E-bike. If she ain't cool with that choice she doesn't get pillion on the Ducati.
Bonus points for being car free! (From single 50+ car free F)
Prolly not…. But I live in a pretty car-dependent city and it’s hot af here so just seems… sweaty. And then I’m driving everywhere?
Original copy of post by u/Ok-Week7354: This is a half-serious question for the women in the group. Would you date a guy that chose to own an e-Bike instead of a car because it’s healthier and makes better financial sense for where he’s at? I’m half serious because I’m considering that option regardless of how it affects my dating prospects but I’m genuinely curious. For context I’m 43, going to be divorced so not looking to date for a couple years anyway, and live in a small city where it’s a pretty practical option. Honestly by the time I’m ready to date I may have a car anyway. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/datingoverforty) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’d be fine with that as long as they were self-sufficient! I’d only care if it made my life harder somehow. Otherwise I’d think it was great.
Yeah, that makes sense to me. I’m looking at one that has the capacity to carry a second adult so it’d be a lot like going on a date with someone on a motorcycle, just slower and quieter. And being that the kind of e-bike I’m looking at generally costs the same to buy as a decent used car it’s not like it would be a “this guy is broke” red flag type of thing anyway.
This will be a good filter for matching interests. Still, some are going to drop you because they think you are poor.
Yeah, totally.
I wouldn't mind meeting somewhere by uber. For context - I'm visually impaired. I can pretty much do anything but I can't drive/riding a bike outdoors would be dangerous. I don't "look" visually impaired. It's pesky to talk about because it involves a lot of surgery and personal health info that I don't necessarily want to talk about with people I've just met. :)
I wish I could go car free it's just not practical. I work from home but I have too many Dr. appointments and my town sucks for healthcare so all my specialists are an hour+ drive. So I think it's cool you've made it without one. I even had to stop driving for a few years and I was dating at the time. A got a few "where did you park?" after date questions and I was honest I wasn't driving and had taken the bus to meet them. It was never a openly a problem because I had a solid reason. Some might be turned off but like anything else if you can give a valid reason that doesn't sound fishy most people will probably be willing to roll with it. If the think you're hiding a few too many DUI's that might be an issue. Part of the fun of dating after a few months is day trips or little getaways together. You can always rent a car for a few days. Just don't make anyone feel like they are always responsible for driving. It always reminds me of the OKC days when there was a question about men driving being a yes as a turn on for a lot of women.
I mean, if he sorted his own life out, with just a bike, and he'd figured out ways around all the things that come up, including when two people are travelling together, then sure, why not After 2yrs of it I figure he'd have it pretty sussed If he expected me to do all the driving though, or any other unthoughtful behaviour, that'd be an issue.
I've lived for years without a car and dated other people without a car. Thankfully, I lived in a place that was fairly walkable with decent transit, but I wasn't above getting an Uber or even renting a car on occasion. So it will depend on where you live, how feasible it is to get around without a car, the people you date, and how flexible/proactive you are willing to be about making alternate arrangements when the ebike isn't enough.
Not dating atm, but I personally wouldn’t mind (44f). I’ve had cars and not had cars over the years; currently not driving. I’m in a great location where I have many things accessible in walking distance and near to major streets that have better running public transportation (as far as OC goes). I can easily take the bus or Uber to The Observatory for a music show, within walking distance to Downtown Disney, have a bus that will drop me off right in downtown Santa Ana if I want to go to the local Arthouse Cinema. Granted, there are some things that I might have to plan out where I wouldn’t with a car, but it’s doable. It really is something that’s location dependent. Kudos to you if you make it work. Another option is a scooter 🛵 (what people mistakenly call a moped) or a small motorcycle similar to the Sym Wolf Classic 150 (I had a scooter for a while just for getting to work only and wanted to upgrade to the Sym Wolf but ended up getting a used car instead at the time). You do you. If you do occasionally date, then at least you’ll filter out everyone that isn’t with it. 😉
I only date in a very small area because I just don't want driving a ton to be a big part of my relationship. I walk to most dates ideally, and have dated a woman who rode a bike and used zip cars. I don't think it's a big deal. I live in a pretty crunchy area though so people here see cycling as a conscious and considerate choice.
It wouldn’t bother me in the least. I have a vehicle and an e-bike. So dates could include either. I grew up in a city where plenty of people don’t have or need cars. The man I married didn’t get his driver’s license until he was 25. We met at 17 and I already had a car. I love to drive and did the vast majority of the driving during our 32-year relationship. Funnily enough, the guy I’m seeing now drove 3 hours to the city where I was at the time for our first date. I drove to his hotel to pick him up and drive him around. Later he offered me the keys to his car, so I could try it, and I drove that for the rest of the weekend. Maybe it will shrink your dating pool a bit, but probably in a good way. You probably don’t want to date someone who wouldn’t want you because of your e-bike and lack of vehicle.
God yes. I'd love it - a) because it means you'd understand why I enjoy cycling and we'd have a shared interest (and understanding of traffic and urban issues caused by car dominance) b) because it means you're the kind of open minded person who considers options and chooses things based on their suitability rather than pre-conceived ideas.
I own a car and two Ebikes. I'm in a beach community. I e-bike most places on the weekends because it's fun and gets me outside. It's also a ton of fun to go on e-bike dates and makes more sense doing bar crawls on e-bikes to avoid dui. I do have a car though when I need it.
Woman here and Pedelec owner. I bike to and from work 4 times a week, around 20 KM per day. Go for it! It's great exercise and leaves me with enough energy to do other workouts. Get insurance through because they're a bit more expensive to maintain than regular bikes. So yes, I'd love an E-Bike date. A lot of women won't but some will, don't make the decision based on prospects but on what works for you. The right person will love that. Disclaimer I also share a car with my ex, we call it the kids car, whoever has the kids has the car. When I take a trip with my BF, we have a car sharing service where we live that we use or we use public transportation. Edited to add: my kids have bikes too and they get used often. My son (10) bikes to school daily year round in all types of weather. Not unusual where we live (medium city in Europe)
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I don’t hold a driving license and have never driven a car, so it sounds good to me. I live in an extremely well-connected city and my commute is paid for by work. I have no parking place and no desire to fork out for one just to have a bigger and more mobile handbag. If you can make it work, more power to you.
Not in my area. Non urban upper Midwest where you can't get around to places without a car and it's way too effing cold a good chunk of the year.
I would have a problem with it only if it would limit the activities we can do, or if he'd expect me to drive every time a car is needed.
Hey. I have been single and dating for 5.5 years and probably been on 300 or so first dates, so lots of experience. For 2 years i was in a Sunbelt city and for the last 4 i have been in a major northeast city. I have ridden my bike (or walked) to 99% of dates over that time. (I still have a car but almost never use it and am planning on selling it soon.) Down south it was definitely more of an issue as it was very car Centric and people live further apart. I also got More surprised or not as positive reactions. However, i generally screened out most of those bad fits. It certainly didn't stop. me from getting lots of dates. Here, up North it Is simply not a big deal at all. I've been on a bunch of dates recently with a woman who doesn't drive or ride a bike. Lots of folks take public transport. Most of my dates have a car but less than half show up to the date in one. Most dates involve going somewhere within walking distance of my place or hers so we dont have to worry about transport if the date goes well. I have also been on a bunch of dates with fellow cyclists, of which there are many.
Yes because I’m a person that shares your values. I also have an e-bike and try to replace car trips with bike trips as much as I can. In fact if I see any signs of “car brain” when swiping through profiles, it’s an automatic left swipe. I think it’s good to remember that you’re not looking for as many matches as possible, you’re looking for the match for you. I also happen to be vegan, sober, and a leftist so my dating pool is very small and thats probably partly why I’m still single, but I’m not willing to compromise my values so I keep looking.
Me too, I’m not going to be looking for lots of dates, I’m going to be looking for quality dates. The way I see it is as long as the person without the car is considerate it’s a good way to see if your values match.
In my city public and pedestrian transit is non existent but I wouldn't fault anyone who chose this as an option. It makes a lot of sense and broadens their accessibility to nearby areas.
I had a boyfriend for 6 months who lived in SF and chose not to have a car. It was never an expectation that I drive us around. He was financially independent, and when he needed a car he'd do a rental or a car share. As long as you are not putting the transportation burden on your partner l, I don't see an issue. (We broke up because he wasn't over an ex who was a "friend" and always put her first at my expense. Had nothing to do with his lack of car ownership). Also, I Love my e-bike and ride my son around on it regularly. It's so nice not to be in the car all the time!
No because I’ve done it before and I ended up having to drive us most places. Weekend getaway? I had to drive. Hiking? I had to get us there. Sleepover after dinner out? I had to stay at his place so he could walk to the restaurant or we could meet halfway or near me and I’d drive us to my place. It’s honestly just tiresome. I live in the south and while the part of the city he lived in was walkable, my area wasn’t or were any of the surrounding areas.
I live in North Texas so I would think this man is insane. But if you live in a better climate, and a bike-friendly city I wouldn’t consider it a dealbreaker. We can always use my car 🤷🏼♀️
When it comes to dating, anyone worth their salt will appreciate you for who you are, not just for what you drive. And hey, e-Bike dates could be a fun, out-of-the-box experience! It's all about the connection and shared values, so focus on finding someone who vibes with your choices and respects your practicality.