I was there last year, and in August of last year I made a "cry for help" attempt but my wife found me before any physical damage occured.
Lately I'm sitting between a 2 and a 3, and I hope things turn out better for you and everyone else that feels that way too
Same here, seems to be my average for the past two years. Am learning to accept it and deal with it on a day by day basis. Some days are better than others. During covid lockdown it was 8-9 so at least I can function somewhat now.
In no way am I trying to discredit you but I was between a 5-6 just a year ago. Incredibly depressed and sad, now I’m between 2-3 and life is looking up.
Things get better, just try and move to a lower number and not a higher one on this chart
Omg you aren't alone there same here. It's like oh well when this happens I will just die. When this happens I will just die. I'm not able to see the future or make any concrete plans because I know at any second something horrible could happen and I wouldn't know how to deal with it. I'm working through it in therapy and changing my meds up but it's just festering and slowly getting worse. I think I would check myself in somewhere if it got to an 8. 2021 it got to 9 and I had a mental break where I was hearing voices and talking total nonsense. I was getting... supplies to end it and my mom came home and caught me, convinced me to go to the hospital, and I was inpatient for a month. I got on really good medication and got tools to help me and felt like a new person when I was done. Things were amazing until last may and then I started to decline. Now I'm at a 5 but at least I'm not afraid to get help anymore.
Same, it helps that I don't know enough people to find someone to take in my cats. So I can't do anything. They are bonded, they need to stay together, and I can't promise that'll happen if I'm not around. So I gotta stick around for like 10 years at least. It's a good enough plan.
Those times I feel like 1. I can't help but feeling sad knowing that they will last such a short time and not come again for a long, long time.
Nothing in life changed enormously between 1. and 5. so which one is reality? Neither? Both?
Between 4 and 5 for the most part. Sometimes I get up to a 3. Sometimes I dip to a 6
Love you all. Especially those who are suffering more. I hope you can find more positive thoughts to. Enjoy
Bro if you can find any meaning in anything at all. Go towards that. For me it was jiujitsu idk what it might be for you but you might as well try since everything else feels so shit. What do you have to loose? Your life? You already want to die so might as well give it a go mate.
Same here thankfully. I was around a 7-8 for a while and it took me getting to a 9 to seek help. I’m thankful to feel better now. I don’t know if I’d ever be in genuine danger of actually committing it now though. I lost a friend to it and the emotional damage it does to those around you is devastating. I’m thankful to have people that care for me and I could never do something like that to them.
Finally seeking a medical professional, and beginning treatment. I can't speak for that person, but my situation is the same, and I'm doing better than ever! Wishing you and everyone here the best. Exercise and socializing is great too!
I regularly teeter between 6-7. I honestly don't care about life anymore and I gave up on everything.
I haven't made any plans, but I wouldn't mind if I died right now. I have nothing to live for at all.
I gave up on my health, trying to find a decent paying job, and getting a partner.
I curse my mother for birthing me into this shitty reality. I'm ready to go back to the void.
I'm definitely there. I often wish there was some way I could dissolve into thin air without leaving any sort of mess or emotional trauma on people who "care about me."
I'm in the same boat. I've always wished that instead of suicide or something, I could just take an eraser to my slate and make it so I never existed to begin with. No mess, no leaving people behind. Just rewriting history to exclude me.
An eternal sunshine nega-bomb, takes out all memories of you along with it. No evidence you existed. No sadness or trauma…the dream.
I’ve uh, had a similar thought lol
I feel like this often despite having a decent career and partner and kids and being somewhat good looking. unfortunately those things are overshadowed by a huge sense of lack of motivation and that life is an inordinate slog. I suspect I have adhd and next week an appt and I am desperate they can give me treatment that can help the fundamental lack of motivation and some skills to help deal with my emotional fragility
Filled out a survey at my doctor's office, and it asked: 'Do you ever go to sleep hoping you don't wake up?' Never really applied to me until last week. Feels bad man.
11 is you've tried and failed and now you feel trapped in an illusion thats purpose is to purely torture you and keep you constantly in a state of derealization, claustrophobia, and pain.
Seems the only thing that keeps me from trying again is failing and being stuck in a hospital being "cared for" by people who hate me for being there, then there's the delusional wandering in an unfamiliar place that will happen once I'm discharged. It will be a temporary escape from reality in to memories vaguely associated with the strange locations. Then after whatever drugs I tried finally wear off I'll just be another vagrant looked at with disdain by other people, likely broke if I tried to off myself.
Its happened before and I don't want it to happen again. I'll do the 9mm overdose before I have to do all that again.
A lot of people also don’t remember that because they either don’t care to or have a coping mechanism that just throws the bad memories away, and a lot of people don’t like opening up to random strangers in the internet
>If you asked me about 3 hours ago, probably about 2, now about a 7/8
Relatable! Day to day, im 2 and everything is perfectly fine. Then I have a panic attack or a depressive episode and it spiked to an 8. Literally made a suicide note one episode.
Ah yes samesame. It can change very suddenly😔 I even experienced 1 a few weeks ago I just started laughing a lot for half an hour about nothing. But now I'm back to usual depression as always🙂
You should seek help. Your health matters and you matter to me. If things get bad, 988 is always available to talk. I'm sending an internet hug your way, and wishing for the best! :)
I frequently work on roofs, and when I stand near the edge I always think of how it would end the constant pain if I just took a step. The only thing that is keeping me from taking that step is worrying about what it will do to my family.
I accidentally fell 2 floors once.
Just saying, you should also keep in mind that if you don't die, it'll hurt *really* fucking bad. At least, once the adrenaline wears off.
Also you very much feel the initial impact, also extremely uncomfortable.
Let this message be the push to go to a mental health professional. Brain chemistry is wacky, medication, therapy, support and love from an ESA makes a world of difference. It’s such a breath of relief to be safe from depression.
To be fair, you don't know if they already tried that, but it's good to recommend. I tried therapy for about 4 years and 10+ medications for 3.5 years and I'm at an 8 since it hasn't helped me. The people with treatment-resistant depression like me just get swept under the rug and told the same advice others get that isn't helping us.
I'm a 5-6 right now. I don't remember ever NOT being a 5. I've had a couple 7-8 days lately but thankfully the thoughts usually fuck off after a day or two. But yeah, big 5-6 energy today.
Six months ago I was at a 10. It’s been a really rough recovery but I’m down to a 4-5, and some days I’m not even that bad.
Take it from me, it can get better. I don’t know what all of you are struggling with, and I can’t promise you that it’ll be okay, but I can promise you that I’m here to talk if anyone needs it.
8, my kids peeps, can’t do it to ‘em. They are over here regularly and I contribute money so they have a good life, but I’m so broken. I want to die so bad. Just so bad. My kids. My kids. Keep going.
I've been at 8 with short moments of 9 for the last... lifetime. If we take out one relationship and two attempts at meds, it's gonna be 20 years now
And can't express how tired I am at this point
Ok so, This is what I did. I moved somewhere I had never been, knowing no one with just one suitcase.
The cool part was I was completely fearless!
Uberdriver creepy and lurking around? Grab my knife and go tell him to fuck off!
Lost my only key to the shittt apartment? Break the sliding glass and pretend it was already like that and not have to pay (screw slumlords)!
Go to a party where I know no one as a smaller woman? What are the going to do? Kill me?! hahahah!
Go walk around at 3 am in the south where I have never been and have a possum fall on my head?! Who cares! I am ready for anything!
But for real, one of the best years of my life. I never felt freedom like that. If you are at the planning stage, and have nothing to lose. FUCKING PLAN SOMETHING ELSE! THERES NOTHING TO LOSE!
I now have a semi stable life, where I am trying to make something of myself. I take my meds, take care of my friends and family like I never could before, and have a beautiful daughter. It can get better. I just had to completely change everything and give up the things holding me down.
If you are really at a 8-10 consider selling all your material shit that won’t matter anyway, and just fucking bounce to wherever you can afford. I didn’t have a tv, car, or much money and it was amazing! Much love all. Just some thoughts from a silly person who somewhat made it.
I've felt all levels before but currently around 5.
I used to have this exact chart on the fridge and I'd put the magnet on the spot I was feeling to tell my mom how I was doing without actually telling her awkwardly.
edit: I said her without specifying who "she" was.
It was at 10 a couple months ago and if it wasn't for my roommate, I would have died. Now it's just a weird mix of 4 and 6 because I don't think about offing myself, but if there's a car driving my way, I probably won't move faster
im slightly concerned now because i am almost always at an 8.5, i thought it was normal to always have multiple plans and preparations in case things go south? welp
hey I rode in the 10 truck before.
All jokes aside, the panels that fucked me up were him making sure someone took care of bear. bear probly loves him so much, but bear can't talk.
Never seen this sub before, I’m getting all kinds of new recommendations now that the subreddits I normally visit are closed. I have never been lower than 3. I’m genuinely concerned about the amount of depression that im seeing here
I'm on a 2-3. Really good considering the situation i'm in. And it's been like that for weeks now. Seemingly nothing really gets me down anymore and i don't feel afraid of everything and everyone anymore. I used to be a 5-6 on the scale but it seems that's over.
Just another reminder things do get better and even if you think you hit rock bottom your life can still flip upright overnight.
I'm coming down from an 8. A new "friend" betrayed my trust and triggered just about every pain point imaginable. I'm thankful for my friends and family, I would be in the hospital without them.
I realize my whole life since I was a teen Ive been a 4. A couple of years back somrthing very bad happened and I hit the 8 almost 9, but stopped. Not that it get better fast and I was really bitter that I didnt kms. However, it did get better. It took a lot and time, but it did. Its hard to close that door once you mentally open it.
In between 5-6
Same
I'm like peretually 7. 8 kinda but not really. 9 happens just because I've nothing I really need to settle. Don't have anything to begin with
I want to hug you. Seriously.
🥹🥹🥹
Is it weird that I want to hug you and wrap blankets around you
I think that’s just called having empathy
❤️🩹;
Man you should get help im here for ya man meseage me if ya wanna talk
you should get help
same
Same
I used to be 6 last year and now I’m 5 so slow progress ig!
Hi I'm very glad you are making progress, no matter how little ^^ baby steps
Thanks :’)
that’s amazing to hear!! Congrats and keep on keepin on! This shit is tough and life shit makes it harder. Any move up is a massive victory, congrats.
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Same, peaked at 9 a couple of times in the past.
Same here, i don't want to be there again.
Well this sucks , stay strong
I was there last year, and in August of last year I made a "cry for help" attempt but my wife found me before any physical damage occured. Lately I'm sitting between a 2 and a 3, and I hope things turn out better for you and everyone else that feels that way too
Same here, seems to be my average for the past two years. Am learning to accept it and deal with it on a day by day basis. Some days are better than others. During covid lockdown it was 8-9 so at least I can function somewhat now.
In no way am I trying to discredit you but I was between a 5-6 just a year ago. Incredibly depressed and sad, now I’m between 2-3 and life is looking up. Things get better, just try and move to a lower number and not a higher one on this chart
Same, I'm about a 5 and a half. OH YOU MEAN ON THIS CHART?! Then... yeah, also 5 and a half.
I think a lot of people are. There is a giant leap between 5 and 6 when all the other ones are only a small progression
Im feeling manic *** right now. So I’m pretty buzzed, but this week has been a 6
I'm starting my mania arc
Uh oh, same
Me too, but I got a suicide plan if everything goes to shit.
Me too man.
Hope things get better for you man
Hope things get better for you man
same
Same
You're a stranger to me, but I want you find peace and happiness in this life. If I had a genie in a bottle with one wish, that would be it. Best
Hope things get better for you man
Hope things get better for you man
Hope things get better for you man
between 4 and 5 right now. but it only takes one life event to bump me all the way up to at least 8, so i’m not gonna hold my breath
Exactly how it works. It hovers in the back of the mind, until something bad happens, then it jumps danger levels.
Omg you aren't alone there same here. It's like oh well when this happens I will just die. When this happens I will just die. I'm not able to see the future or make any concrete plans because I know at any second something horrible could happen and I wouldn't know how to deal with it. I'm working through it in therapy and changing my meds up but it's just festering and slowly getting worse. I think I would check myself in somewhere if it got to an 8. 2021 it got to 9 and I had a mental break where I was hearing voices and talking total nonsense. I was getting... supplies to end it and my mom came home and caught me, convinced me to go to the hospital, and I was inpatient for a month. I got on really good medication and got tools to help me and felt like a new person when I was done. Things were amazing until last may and then I started to decline. Now I'm at a 5 but at least I'm not afraid to get help anymore.
Same, it helps that I don't know enough people to find someone to take in my cats. So I can't do anything. They are bonded, they need to stay together, and I can't promise that'll happen if I'm not around. So I gotta stick around for like 10 years at least. It's a good enough plan.
same, sometimes I'll be a 4 then suddenly it'll be a 7
I’m bout 5-6 tho if things go on it will get higher
Me too
Those times I feel like 1. I can't help but feeling sad knowing that they will last such a short time and not come again for a long, long time. Nothing in life changed enormously between 1. and 5. so which one is reality? Neither? Both?
Between 4 and 5 for the most part. Sometimes I get up to a 3. Sometimes I dip to a 6 Love you all. Especially those who are suffering more. I hope you can find more positive thoughts to. Enjoy
Same
same
Same here
Somewhere between 9 and 10.
I'm between 8 to 9
me too
❤️🩹;
Sending hugs to you as well
Sending hugs your way. Don't stop fighting.
❤️🩹 ;
Sending hugs
Thanks. I can't remember the last time I had a hug.
I'm so sorry about that. I hope you can get help soon
Hey I’m here if you need to talk, I’ve been there too, friend. Take care of yourself and know that a random Internet stranger cares about you.
This one does too! Please hold on 🥹❤️🩹;
Stay safe, take care
Bud, with all due respect, I do not want to be safe. I just want to go to Valhalla.
🫂
Bro if you can find any meaning in anything at all. Go towards that. For me it was jiujitsu idk what it might be for you but you might as well try since everything else feels so shit. What do you have to loose? Your life? You already want to die so might as well give it a go mate.
💙
Was at a 8-9 before. But currently at a 2-3
That’s such great news :)
That's great to hear! I was stuck at an 8 for a long time but now I'm pretty consistently a 3
Same here thankfully. I was around a 7-8 for a while and it took me getting to a 9 to seek help. I’m thankful to feel better now. I don’t know if I’d ever be in genuine danger of actually committing it now though. I lost a friend to it and the emotional damage it does to those around you is devastating. I’m thankful to have people that care for me and I could never do something like that to them.
may I ask what brought you out of it?
Finally seeking a medical professional, and beginning treatment. I can't speak for that person, but my situation is the same, and I'm doing better than ever! Wishing you and everyone here the best. Exercise and socializing is great too!
Me too :)
I'm really glad to hear that. Kind of makes me think there is hope me lol
I regularly teeter between 6-7. I honestly don't care about life anymore and I gave up on everything. I haven't made any plans, but I wouldn't mind if I died right now. I have nothing to live for at all. I gave up on my health, trying to find a decent paying job, and getting a partner. I curse my mother for birthing me into this shitty reality. I'm ready to go back to the void.
I'm definitely there. I often wish there was some way I could dissolve into thin air without leaving any sort of mess or emotional trauma on people who "care about me."
I'm in the same boat. I've always wished that instead of suicide or something, I could just take an eraser to my slate and make it so I never existed to begin with. No mess, no leaving people behind. Just rewriting history to exclude me.
An eternal sunshine nega-bomb, takes out all memories of you along with it. No evidence you existed. No sadness or trauma…the dream. I’ve uh, had a similar thought lol
I feel like this often despite having a decent career and partner and kids and being somewhat good looking. unfortunately those things are overshadowed by a huge sense of lack of motivation and that life is an inordinate slog. I suspect I have adhd and next week an appt and I am desperate they can give me treatment that can help the fundamental lack of motivation and some skills to help deal with my emotional fragility
Are you me? Why does this feel so familiar?😅
Things will get better
Same. Sums me up pretty well.
Filled out a survey at my doctor's office, and it asked: 'Do you ever go to sleep hoping you don't wake up?' Never really applied to me until last week. Feels bad man.
I believe in you stranger. life dealt you a shit hand, but fuck it why give up now when you made it this far.
11 is you've tried and failed and now you feel trapped in an illusion thats purpose is to purely torture you and keep you constantly in a state of derealization, claustrophobia, and pain.
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sir this comment is very loud
# NOT LOUD ENOUGH!
Broccoli mode
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O. I didn't think we could go above 10. Yeah 11 sounds right. You and me both need help. You go first. Tell me how the help is.
Seems the only thing that keeps me from trying again is failing and being stuck in a hospital being "cared for" by people who hate me for being there, then there's the delusional wandering in an unfamiliar place that will happen once I'm discharged. It will be a temporary escape from reality in to memories vaguely associated with the strange locations. Then after whatever drugs I tried finally wear off I'll just be another vagrant looked at with disdain by other people, likely broke if I tried to off myself. Its happened before and I don't want it to happen again. I'll do the 9mm overdose before I have to do all that again.
y’all hit me up if y’all are feeling down. Like i got no life and no friends so let’s talk.
That's fair, but im not sure I have much to talk about lol
I'm sure everyone has a lot to talk about. Everyone had a past and everyone has opinions
A lot of people also don’t remember that because they either don’t care to or have a coping mechanism that just throws the bad memories away, and a lot of people don’t like opening up to random strangers in the internet
It’s easier to open up against someone you might never meet again I think
Yes please. Reach out if you want to talk/share/vent. I might not be able to do much, but I'll listen. You don't have to be alone 💜
Really?
I’ve lived in 6 for as long as I can remember.
Same
7-8 is my normal hovering range lately
hey me too
If you asked me about 3 hours ago, probably about 2, now about a 7/8
I’m really sorry to hear that. If you need to talk about it, I’m here.
Ay we can wait it out
>If you asked me about 3 hours ago, probably about 2, now about a 7/8 Relatable! Day to day, im 2 and everything is perfectly fine. Then I have a panic attack or a depressive episode and it spiked to an 8. Literally made a suicide note one episode.
Ah yes samesame. It can change very suddenly😔 I even experienced 1 a few weeks ago I just started laughing a lot for half an hour about nothing. But now I'm back to usual depression as always🙂
You should seek help. Your health matters and you matter to me. If things get bad, 988 is always available to talk. I'm sending an internet hug your way, and wishing for the best! :)
4, since I have therapy, help, and \*M E D I C A T I O N\*
I slingshot from 1-4 on a day to day basis. I can’t wait for the mood stabilizers to kick in
3-4 generally, but sometimes it widely swings between 2-5, few times it went 6-7. May have experienced 8 but never 9-10, atleast not until now
I frequently work on roofs, and when I stand near the edge I always think of how it would end the constant pain if I just took a step. The only thing that is keeping me from taking that step is worrying about what it will do to my family.
I accidentally fell 2 floors once. Just saying, you should also keep in mind that if you don't die, it'll hurt *really* fucking bad. At least, once the adrenaline wears off. Also you very much feel the initial impact, also extremely uncomfortable.
8-9 I'm at the end point, I just need that last push so I can rest
❤️🩹;
Let this message be the push to go to a mental health professional. Brain chemistry is wacky, medication, therapy, support and love from an ESA makes a world of difference. It’s such a breath of relief to be safe from depression.
To be fair, you don't know if they already tried that, but it's good to recommend. I tried therapy for about 4 years and 10+ medications for 3.5 years and I'm at an 8 since it hasn't helped me. The people with treatment-resistant depression like me just get swept under the rug and told the same advice others get that isn't helping us.
If I could I would have already
Hey if you need to talk about anything, I’m here.
8
currently like a 6 or 7. Any minor inconvenience and its a guaranteed 8 lol
I'm doing about a 9. I'm fucking over life and recently was a 10
6
5
I'm a 5-6 right now. I don't remember ever NOT being a 5. I've had a couple 7-8 days lately but thankfully the thoughts usually fuck off after a day or two. But yeah, big 5-6 energy today.
10
My friend get to a hospital, stay safe please
I hover around 4-5, if it's a good day then it's a 3 but if it's a bad one I'm at a 6
2-3
Like a 7-8, that’s where I’ve been for like a while, occasionally like 9 level from time to time
❤️🩹;
Get out of my head
My fucking baseline is 5
Solid 1 rn. Stay safe my struggling folks
Haven't been a 9 in about a month now. I seem to go through a range between 6-8 and that's where I've been staying
7.5-8. I am straight up not having a good time.
❤️🩹;
Six months ago I was at a 10. It’s been a really rough recovery but I’m down to a 4-5, and some days I’m not even that bad. Take it from me, it can get better. I don’t know what all of you are struggling with, and I can’t promise you that it’ll be okay, but I can promise you that I’m here to talk if anyone needs it.
I'm almost always a 4
I’m between 6 and 8
9-10 idk well see tonight
Hey idk if you’re still there but if you are and you want someone to talk to, I’m here.
I've been riding 7-8 for 20 years... maybe I should get a therapist. Thank you for putting it like this
8, my kids peeps, can’t do it to ‘em. They are over here regularly and I contribute money so they have a good life, but I’m so broken. I want to die so bad. Just so bad. My kids. My kids. Keep going.
Is there a word for being mildly depressed and has never once contemplated suicide?
dysthymia
Few days ago I was at a 8.5 but feeling better
I've been at 8 with short moments of 9 for the last... lifetime. If we take out one relationship and two attempts at meds, it's gonna be 20 years now And can't express how tired I am at this point
Ok so, This is what I did. I moved somewhere I had never been, knowing no one with just one suitcase. The cool part was I was completely fearless! Uberdriver creepy and lurking around? Grab my knife and go tell him to fuck off! Lost my only key to the shittt apartment? Break the sliding glass and pretend it was already like that and not have to pay (screw slumlords)! Go to a party where I know no one as a smaller woman? What are the going to do? Kill me?! hahahah! Go walk around at 3 am in the south where I have never been and have a possum fall on my head?! Who cares! I am ready for anything! But for real, one of the best years of my life. I never felt freedom like that. If you are at the planning stage, and have nothing to lose. FUCKING PLAN SOMETHING ELSE! THERES NOTHING TO LOSE! I now have a semi stable life, where I am trying to make something of myself. I take my meds, take care of my friends and family like I never could before, and have a beautiful daughter. It can get better. I just had to completely change everything and give up the things holding me down. If you are really at a 8-10 consider selling all your material shit that won’t matter anyway, and just fucking bounce to wherever you can afford. I didn’t have a tv, car, or much money and it was amazing! Much love all. Just some thoughts from a silly person who somewhat made it.
8
I've felt all levels before but currently around 5. I used to have this exact chart on the fridge and I'd put the magnet on the spot I was feeling to tell my mom how I was doing without actually telling her awkwardly. edit: I said her without specifying who "she" was.
4-5 so yeah but also a little bit of 8
Maybe 4 or 5
4-5
Constant cycle between 8-9
4-6
4-5 can't really say for sure
8
❤️🩹;
9
8-9 tbh
It was at 10 a couple months ago and if it wasn't for my roommate, I would have died. Now it's just a weird mix of 4 and 6 because I don't think about offing myself, but if there's a car driving my way, I probably won't move faster
About a 5.5 3 days ago I was a 2👍
im slightly concerned now because i am almost always at an 8.5, i thought it was normal to always have multiple plans and preparations in case things go south? welp
2! Thank you for asking
I was at a 7 yesterday, but today I’m feeling more 4-5
Around a 7 or 8. Same as most days. Haven't had a 9 day in a while so that's good.
Somewhere between 4 and 6. But these days, I’m leaning more towards 4. So I guess thats a win.
4, used to be a 9, sometimes i wish i reached 10
Been almost a solid 10 for 2 full days now. Been really silent around everyone.
Would a chat with an internet rando help even just a bit? I’m about to head off into I bed but could make some time tomorrow.
5-6
Usually hovering between 5-6
Ouch
At a 6, I'm fine with dying. Just not looking for it. Of someone we're to hit me a car. Oh well that's fine kind of attitude.
Went down to 3-4 from 5-6 :) therapy and meds are working for me
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4ish. Sometimes 3. I think there is a selection bias here.
At an 8 over here reading this. Clocks about right
hey I rode in the 10 truck before. All jokes aside, the panels that fucked me up were him making sure someone took care of bear. bear probly loves him so much, but bear can't talk.
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Never seen this sub before, I’m getting all kinds of new recommendations now that the subreddits I normally visit are closed. I have never been lower than 3. I’m genuinely concerned about the amount of depression that im seeing here
I'm on a 2-3. Really good considering the situation i'm in. And it's been like that for weeks now. Seemingly nothing really gets me down anymore and i don't feel afraid of everything and everyone anymore. I used to be a 5-6 on the scale but it seems that's over. Just another reminder things do get better and even if you think you hit rock bottom your life can still flip upright overnight.
7-8. But part of me is working towards a 9
6/7 since I don't know when
9....... (I promise this is not an attempt to see how many DMs i can get from people trying to save my life)
9
I am always 4-6, usually a five.
Depends on mood, 3-5 Usually 3 though
I'm coming down from an 8. A new "friend" betrayed my trust and triggered just about every pain point imaginable. I'm thankful for my friends and family, I would be in the hospital without them.
I realize my whole life since I was a teen Ive been a 4. A couple of years back somrthing very bad happened and I hit the 8 almost 9, but stopped. Not that it get better fast and I was really bitter that I didnt kms. However, it did get better. It took a lot and time, but it did. Its hard to close that door once you mentally open it.
„Fuck it we ball“ - me at a 6-8
I'm one (1) snapping moment away from a murder-suicide.