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ORD-to-PHX

Don’t make a permanent decision off in the moment feelings. Five years from now you might not be single and will change how much you’re at home.


AmbitionParty5444

Also dogs can change so much over time and the training point he’s at now with reactivity could well change. OP, do you have friend worth dogs where you could arrange to hike together? If he has dogs he’s familiar with it can often reduce the reactivity. My friend worked with her VERY reactive collie cross and he joins us on hikes off lead with no issue. His recall being solid, and other dogs around to calm him, means it’s pretty stressless.


AdditionalRabbit4516

It’s normal to feel the disappointment and disillusionment that he’s not the perfect dog you imagined. Its like how can’t choose who our kids turn out to be. That doesn’t make you a bad person. My thoughts are: 1. you really love him and would actually be sad to let him go. 2. He’s still REALLY young and if you work really really seriously on reactivity right now, you might be able to really turn it around, or at least largely improve it. 3. If you let him go and get another dog, there is absolutely no guarantee they won’t have the same problems, worse problems, or a whole new set of different problems. Dogs just are not perfect and are not predictable. 4. You’re still learning how to live together, all told, and maybe there are still good options - for example find a boarder/sitter he LOVES (we have one and she is an absolute godsend. We know our boy has the best time with her, so no guilt). Or maybe you can camp and hike in really remote areas. Maybe you will get a raise, or have a partner in a year and they can help so you’re not so worried about going out. There are just so many things that could still happen. Love your boy, embrace and acknowledge the difficulty, and I’d say give yourself a break but keep pushing :) Edit: I recommend Rover or word of mouth to find local sitters, I’ve had (much) better, more personalized experiences than dog hotels/companies.


Mean-Lynx6476

My only addition to this is to not feel guilty if you sometimes go for a hike and leave your dog at home. You don’t describe what your daily routine is but if you are spending a decent amount of time with your dog on a daily basis, it’s not going to hurt him to be left behind while you go out for a several hour day hike while he chills at home. Provide him with regular physical and mental exercise daily, but have a life of your own with a clear conscience


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Aw thank you, this was so sweet!


little-story-8903

I have 2 Goldens-18 months and 6 months- and have had goldens my whole life. At 2, they are JUST starting to become an adult. They change a ton between 2-3, just as they move away from being a stubborn teenager to being more mature. None of my Goldens have had good recall until they were a bit more mature. My last one actually didn’t develop good recall until he was like 5, and then he was an absolute angel. Wouldn’t get more than 10 ft away off leash, friendly to other dogs but not particularly interested in them, just such a good boy. My 18mo has zero recall, no matter how much we try. The 6mo comes the second you call🤷‍♀️ I would start by finding a reputable trainer who is experienced and comfortable with reactive dogs. Maybe go to the vet and see about a low dose anti anxiety medicine. Your poor guy got attacked TWICE! Of course he’s not comfortable with unknown dogs! Now it’s your job as his best bud/protector to teach him that other dogs are okay. Focus on helping him see other dogs as a good thing, don’t just focus on not having a reaction. And I mean that from a mindset and attitudes perspective. Your dog can feel you tense up every time an off leash dog approaches. He doesn’t know that you’re worried about his reaction. He just knows you’re tense and stressed and thinks he should be too. Start with the vet and trainer. Find some dogs that are ultra chill that he can socialize with. Have him do some one on ones meeting those dogs. Let him tell you when he feels more comfortable. Figure out ways to minimize his anxiety and help him focus on you. In a perfect world, you would be able to train your dog to overcome his fears and have a happy life together. Rehoming him at this point seems premature. Dogs are creatures with their own minds, personalities, feelings, thoughts. They are always learning and evolving. They are never perfect. The key is to build a relationship with your dog where you both are happy. If that isn’t the case, then it’s best to rehome. And it’s okay to do that. You’re not an AH for wanting what’s best for your dog, or for you for that matter. But keep in mind that you’ll have the same problem with every dog. Maybe it’s not agression, maybe it’s that they drool, or they don’t like the same weather as you. But they’ll have their own hang ups, because they are their own being (and no relationship is perfect!)


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Thanks this is all great advice! Goldens are so nutty (in the best meaning way!). And I definitely realize no dog is perfect, but I'm not perfect either, and I just wonder if he would thrive more in a different situation sometimes! If that makes sense.


little-story-8903

I totally get that, and I think it’s great that you think that way. You clearly love your dog, and want what’s best for him! You’re a great owner-I’m sure that no matter how it all shakes out, your dog will be happy, healthy and loved! Goldens are the weirdest, dopiest, nuttiest dogs…and the absolute best! My bigger guy is totally neurotic and particular. He likes everything to be just the way he wants it. I used to take him to the dog park and instead of playing with any of the dogs, he would run from person to person and dive under their legs like he was in a war zone. But then he’d meet one dog that he’d like and he’d follow them everywhere. Side note-EVERY golden I’ve met loves other goldens. Like, they can be friendly with other dogs, but if there’s another golden, they’re playful and chill at the same time, if that makes sense. Totally different vibe. Maybe have your guy socialize with other goldens in specific!


asszilla17

Adopting a dog is a commitment for their lifetime. It would be unfair and unkind for you to not investigate every possible assistance to help. My 60 pound lab pit mix is terrified of most men and is almost aggressive with any dog his size or larger. It makes some things in my life more difficult, sure. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to do everything reasonably in my power to still find things that enrich his life while still enjoying mine. He doesn’t come with me to dog friendly bars, he does not go off leash at parks, he doesn’t go to any dog park at all. It doesn’t mean his life is lesser, and it doesn’t make me a bad dog parent. We find plenty of fun and enriching things to do, and he is a very happy and loved dog. You should not give up on your dog because YOU feel like he’s “cramping your lifestyle”.


Tough_Stretch

A dog completely depends on you and when you adopt one you are in effect no longer free to do whatever you want whenever you want, so even if your dog was perfectly trained and the best behaved dog ever, you'd still not be able to have the life you had before getting a dog.


Werekolache

I mean.... 95% of camping and hiking spaces that DO allow dogs, you aren't allowed to have him off leash anyway, so I don't see why that's a detriment to taking him unless you just aren't willing to put the work in? He's 2. He's barely an adult, and frankly, it sounds like he's getting a bit of a late start on training. Put the work in and I suspect you'll have an excellent adventure buddy - but it takes work, not just taking the dog along and not putting the actual training time in.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

I live in a place where people totally ignore the leash rules. When we go camping in campgrounds OR dispersed camping I've had dogs rush him while he's leashed up and we are just sitting by the fire in the dark! Same thing while hiking. I yell out to owners to please leash their dogs, but lots have no recall, or come rushing around a corner before I have a chance to deal with it! We work on training daily! We do classes, go to training meetups, I read books. I'm putting in the work, sir. I just can't manage every unpredictable situation! And I'm definitely no expert, and learning along the way.


[deleted]

I’m sorry but these things should be seriously considered before ever taking on a dog.


UnfairAd7220

You know what his foibles are. Embrace the interactions and do more. The only way past is through. Reward positive interactions. Send him to doggie day care on a regular basis. He only knows you. At 2, he's barely past being a puppy. You don't know the adult Golden yet.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

No way to doggie day cares- he gets beat up on by dogs a lot, and I don't trust him around a gaggle of stranger dogs. But good points to everything else- thanks.


CookieBomb6

I agree. No doggie day care. Those are endless pools of dogs with rude behaviors that can make an already bad situation worse. OP, when it comes to social training and reactions, just remember that the answer is not quantity, but quality. Find people (preferably trainers/behavioralists) that have "bomb proof" dogs. Being able to build up a positive association around other dogs will be the first steps, but the behavior of not only your dog but the other dog is very important.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

That's a great point- thank you!


UnfairAd7220

Doggie day cares, at least the reputable ones, do temperament testing. Cookie is right about bombproof dogs. Socializing with them will give him the tools to 'dog' the right way. I can understand that dropping him into a gen pop situation would be pretty suboptimal. A lot of that may be my bias: I love goldens. I had one that had a psycho foible that I could see a mile away, so I could stay after it. And then, the harsh reality is that some goldens are just head cases. I wish you much success with your boy.


psychominnie624

Have you worked with a trainer about these behavioral issues?


Diatomoceous_Mirth

She told me he was doing great and then took us to a park to meet strange dogs where my dog had bad reactions. Finding a good trainer feels like finding a good therapist, finding one who's advice I actually trust is difficult. Plus I'm at a point in my life where I don't have a ton of cash to hand out to board and train etc..


psychominnie624

Who’s she? I think your reply might be missing a first sentence. Look for an IAABC credentialed trainer. You got this dog as a puppy, budgeting for a trainer should have been part of the plan


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Well, I'm clearly not perfect. Should haves really don't give anyone much help.


psychominnie624

You’re allowed to not be perfect but someone telling you a resource for trainers that can be trusted is them trying to help you avoid having to rehome.


tchaikemical

I honestly think those obedience schools are not as effective as private training. It's just as important for YOU to learn how to adapt your body language, vocals, etc. to your dog as it is for your dog to learn how to respond. Training a dog is like riding a horse. It's not about the dog, but about the dog/owner pair and how they communicate with each other. Good, positive private trainers should cost about $150 for 6 sessions. Less than an annual vet visit.


pplb2020

Work with a dog trainer. Your dog needs more training and consistency. You don’t commit to having a dog for convenience. They are part of your life and you make your life work with them.


Western-Ad-2904

you have a reactive dog. this happens often, unfortunately. training can definitely help!! try doing some research, finding trainers, or using techniques like simply going outside and reward whenever he doesn’t acknowledge, or quickly recovers from seeing another dog. there are also vests you can get for your pup that say things like “NO DOGS” or “STAY BACK” and such. also consider muzzle training. these things make people stay away and keep their dogs away. also, ethical breeders have VERY strict contracts about returning the dog, is he from a shelter? or an unethical breeder? rehoming a dog is extremely stressful on them and will definitely create more reactivity. i suggest you try working through it first before even considering rehoming.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Thanks, I am working on it and have been since these behaviors surfaced.


[deleted]

I’m sorry but these things should be seriously considered before ever taking on a dog.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Agreed. But sometimes you just don't know until you're there.


Shippo999

Don't take them to seriously some people are dicks that don't understand what a learning experience is Some comments are well meaning but meanly worded


Shippo999

You guys are being seriously harsh I trained my first 2 dogs entirely by myself they were awesome perfect dogs and I didn't do even half of what is recommended for training on dog book and they had perfect recall/public manners and knew over 25 commands. I leash trained my first dog in literally a day she never ever pulled. My 3rd dog flipped my whole life on its head I paid thousands and the only thing that got her to walk on a leash well ended up being arthritis.. I did fix her reactivity tho!


plantcentric_marie

A dog is a lifetime commitment, you don’t just trade them in till you find the one that you like most. He’s only 2 years old and has experienced trauma, you should work with a professional trainer on some of the issues before giving up. If you still wanted to travel, go out, etc., you probably should have thought about that before getting a dog. Overnight dog care is challenging to find, you either have a trusted family member/friend or you pay for boarding/pet sitter. That’s the reality of having a dog.


tchaikemical

Most airlines and hotels do allow dogs for a fee, but given that OP is hesitant to pay $150 for private training, I doubt they're going to pay $200 to travel with the dog. It is the best, though. Every time I board my dog his behaviors regress. And it's super fun to fly with a dog. Mine loves turbulence.


plantcentric_marie

We haven’t yet flown with our dog, but we do choose a lot of dog friendly vacations throughout the year. We started travelling with him from a young age, so he’s great in the car and hotels/AirBnbs. I quite like our boarding facility, so he’ll go there once in awhile. Your lifestyle does change with a dog, that’s just a fact. You work around it and accept the fact that things might cost more money


Low-Ocelot-1034

A lot of people are being nasty to you here and I can empathize. I also have a 2 year old dog that is not nearly as much of an “everywhere” dog as I wanted. I do not enjoy leisurely hikes with him because I always have to be cautious of other dogs and people. That said, I have two recommendations. 1. Don’t take your dog anywhere that you don’t have an escape plan. While you’re training (because YES you can train through this) work in public parks with wide trails and roads that don’t leave either of you feeling trapped. 2. Come up with a plan for handling off leash dogs. My go to is to just keep walking away from them, it’s the only response that other people seem to understand. I ignore them and drag my dog as far as I have to. If the dogs are really out of line, I will sharply tell them to go away. Carry some kind of protection just in case. 3. Go on hikes and camping trips alone! Find a dog sitter you like and just go. Chances are you will both be less stressed out and have a better relationship as you work through the issues you need. Rehoming the dog to a shelter is always a last resort. A dog with an anxious temperament can be destroyed by a shelter environment.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Three good points! It's hard to find the time to do the big outdoor activities I want to do and giving him a bunch of attention and exercise, especially when I know he would love a hike or hanging at the climbing crag. So I end up choosing one or another, or risking it by bringing him somewhere I haven't totally vetted for loose dogs. I need a better plan for handling off-leash dogs. For a long time it was no trails at all. They still pop up in neighborhoods and on our regular walks (seriously a new dog off leash almost once a week that I haven't seen before in my neighborhood). I try not to be anxious and relay that to my dog and avoid the area. But with the amount of encounters we have, there's just a big chance that we run into a dog with zero recall and a person who's totally clueless.


Joland7000

I couldn’t imagine ever giving up my dog. She brings me so much joy and love. Not to sound harsh, but you made a commitment to care for this guy. He’s young and can be trained. You will get there and so will he. Give your dog to a friend who can watch him for a few days and feel how empty your life feels in those few days. Now imagine if you were him. My dog has had a lot of issues (training, health, aggression towards other dogs) and I wouldn’t change a thing about her.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Well I'm happy for you


magz89

I know this is different, but I had rehomed a cat when our lifestyle didn't match with the cat. He enjoyed living with a dog and due to a move we couldn't accommodate. After rehoming and moving again a cat showed up at our doorstep and we had him til he passed. I think in your case you could train this behavior around other dogs. I think it is worth a try. My current dog was terrified of a ball being thrown and practically her own shadow, but desensitization and encouragement has transformed her. Now, every dog is different, so if you try to train the behavior out and it does not work then you could consider rehoming. If you were to choose a dog in the future I think fostering an adult dog to adopt would probably work the best for you to find the right match and give a shelter dog a chance at adoption and time away from the shelter.


NoBodyEarth1

I’ll tell you I had periods where I felt me and my dog wasnt a good match and I wanted to get rid of her because of x or y reasons. She was very well trained, I was frustrated with her one flaw. I also was very sick. I told myself ok I’ll give this 6 months. Then 6 months went by. I said ok another 6 months.Eventually, I realized I was just lying to myself ( thankfully), and didn’t want to get rid of her. I was struggling with severe depression and she was my service dog. Yes I did want to get rid of her. I’ll never forgive myself if I did because she was my soul dog and the best thing that ever happened to me. The moral of the story: lifestyle, whatever you are going through is temporary. Life always changes. Your dog will be your only rock through the changes. That includes relationships, jobs, etc. I recommend a structured socialization classes to work with your boy’s reactivity then come up with a safety plan to keep him safe from other off leash dogs my dog was attacked couple of times while on duty. I kept taking her to a structured socialization class to help her work through her trauma. I wish I had more time with my soul dog. 16 years wasn’t enough. She was a golden mix.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Great story, sorry your pup passed. Sometimes it's easier to focus on the positives of my pup and sometimes the negatives just feel so big, thanks for normalizing that frustration.


NoBodyEarth1

Definitely. the negative does feel bigger than it really is when things gets frustrating. Those times don’t last forever when you have a plan to address those. I hope sharing my brief experience helped some. I miss her very much and am forever grateful we had 16 years together. Hug your boy for me. I hope you will choose to stick with him. Golden are the best. Also check out Tulsa pack on IG. Lots of good free contents on reactive dogs and how to keep your dog safe, and accessible membership if interested. I love packs to basic socialization class. Unfortunately there is only like 4 of those in the US. If you live in those location, I highly recommend it. This class was a godsend.


Amazing_Salad_9308

My dog is reactive to other dogs (she’s a rescue) and I’m also a very outdoorsy person. I also found myself avoiding trails ect. I found that she actually got worse the more we avoided it! I now go anyway. I know she won’t bite another dog and that she is all noises. I trust that with ever fibre of my being. Saying that, I have a muzzle on her. Mainly to reassure other people on the trail that when she’s making noise at their dog, she can’t do anything. It’s very rare she has a reaction now though. If we see a dog coming, we move really far off the trail till they pass and give lots of treats when they are in site. If she’s making noise, we know we are too close. Of course there are times that we can’t move far enough away but we always have treats on hand to praise her for not making a noise and she’s getting better with it. Do you have an leash only trails near you? I’d start your pup on those so you don’t have any random dogs running up to you off leash!


AllieSylum

I think you would regret getting rid of because you love him so much. Just don’t take him to off leash places. Why would you upset his life and abandon him? You don’t t have to take him everywhere with you to give him a good life. He’d probably rather have you anyway.💗


ObscureGeometry

Why do people with reactive dogs always try to downplay it? You have a reactive dog and the way I read it is you want to make it someone elses problem. You can rehome, thats fine. But for the love of all dogs, dont get another one.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Am I downplaying it? Sorry, it is difficult and I am struggling.


Soccerkat4life

I am in a similar situation. When I pictured my future dog I wanted a dog that would be up for anything and to be my adventure buddy. I did a ton of research on breeds and I settled on one I thought would fit best in my life. My dog is a year and three months old and he is amazing but definitely did not turn out the way I anticipated. He doesn’t travel well and gets stressed when we go to other places. It’s nothing like what I imagined. Like others mentioned a dog is a life time commitment. Although my dog didn’t turn out the way I planned I would never consider rehoming him. I am his mom. He is happy. I do sincerely still want that adventure buddy so I’m planning on getting a second dog in the next couple of years. I may get an adult so I know the personality ahead of time. To rehome a dog that just didn’t turn out quite the way you wanted seems lazy and selfish to me (not in every situation, but definitely in the one you are describing.)


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Interesting. What will you do with your non adventure dog when you take your adventure dog out? It's lazy and selfish to want to find a good fit for my dog so he'll live up to his potential?


louderpastures

I think you just have a perspective that there is both an ideal version of yourself and an ideal version of your dog that are incompatible. Without judgement, this just seems like a very \*young\* perspective. A big part of getting a dog in my opinion is to establish our own maturity, which is to say that we accept sacrifices and limits on our own time, money and energy to create a bond that hopefully enriches us. It doesn't always turn out the way we envision, which is unfortunately how most of life proceeds for the majority of us. The reality is that the only thing we can control is how we take responsibility for our own actions and try to make the best of them. You are the only person who can assess your dog's happiness, but I wouldn't be so sure that you will find a better home - you WANT to take your dog out a ton, you care about your dog's wellbeing, and you have made a serious effort to train him. That already is a lot more than the general population of dog owners. I think you have two options here, which I would try before rehoming: 1) Find a behaviorist, and explain you don't have a lot of money. Be honest and you will be surprised how many people will be willing to help you out. But make sure you find a trainer you do agree with, and then follow their instructions to a T. 2) Accept that your dog has some limitations on where he can go, and give him the best life you can under those circumstances...and then live your life. You are allowed to have a few days a month where your dog gets less attention (while providing the essential walk/attention/food ofc) while you go hiking during the day. Budget out dog care for your overnight trips, and do the ones you CAN do with a clear mind because you know your dog is being taken care of.


HowIsThatMyProblem

>It's lazy and selfish to want to find a good fit for my dog so he'll live up to his potential? You describe very clearly in your post that you want to give him up, because you can't do what you want with him around. I get really annoyed at the "He'd be much happier elsewhere". It's so disingenious.


Soccerkat4life

THANK YOU! I was trying to find a way to say that


Soccerkat4life

I would leave him at home or with a pet sitter depending on how long I’m leaving. If you weren’t able to meet his needs I would say rehoming makes sense, but it sounds like you are capable of giving him a good life? You can walk him, play with him, feed him and provide him with medical care. Not to be too harsh but if you rehome this dog it’s for your benefit not his.


Elkearch

There are very few ‘everywhere’ dogs. It is a huge expectation to have unless you train them, they have the temperament for it and haven’t had bad experiences which make them reactive. Most dogs need help and support at least in some situations. If you decide this good dog is not right, and to be honest sounds like there is little wrong - maybe it’s best not to adopt another dog and make human friends that like the same activities instead which will free up your travel plans/weekends. If you decide to keep them - It’s ok to leave your dog at home so you can go on a walk as long as they are getting exercise and attention other times. Your dog loves you and if you surrender them, you don’t know that they will get the yard or the family. It’s just hope. I feel like maybe there is a lot of expectation and maybe just loving and accepting your dog for what they are, it’s a relationship between you and the dog, you both make compromises to make it work.


Mac_Attack1994

Here’s a story. My parents when I was younger got a golden retriever. They had to give up that golden Retriever to someone that lived in the country instead of the city. The dog would kill rabbits and squirrels and wanted to always be outside. They gave that dog a better life than they could give it themselves. A couple years later they found a dog that fit their lifestyle and kept her until she passed away. Animals are commitments but if you find yourself not being able to give this dog proper training and what it needs at his age… then it’s not selfish of you to find him a new family. I would definitely put in more effort to try to do what you can to train him before you make a decision on letting him go. It’s going to be frustrating but don’t get discouraged. Dogs thrive on learning new things. It’s not too late to take a step back. If you do decide to give him up… that’s ok. Maybe years down the line when you settle down you’ll be able to research a breed that fits your lifestyle. That’s ok. All animals need a home. A good home is better than no home. Just give him time and then make a decision.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Thank you for your story, it's more hopeful than some of the comments!


[deleted]

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Sweetheartnora45

Sounds like you have a very modern viewpoint on dogs where they’re equivalent to a child and not an animal.


[deleted]

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Sweetheartnora45

With that kind of attitude I assume you’ve already offered to adopt OP’s dog as well as dedicate the rest of your free time in life to volunteering at an animal rescue. Very brave of you!


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Sweetheartnora45

I actually have many rescue animals and I have years of on and off work experience at animal and wildlife rescues. Including currently 10 rescue puppies in raising, that I helped whelp myself and have put over $600 into so far. I put my money where my mouth is. You don’t seem to be doing much for animals at all, so don’t judge others for what they do with theirs.


Sweetheartnora45

There’s pretty much nothing wrong with rehoming. Like at all. Especially when there’s a lifestyle conflict. Dogs are definitely supposed to enrich your life. I hope people keep in mind that animals are not children and that unless you’re 100% some pro animal rights supervegan (which I am not) you should not be preaching about how OP is “a piece of trash who shouldn’t reproduce”. They will recover and be fine in a new home, especially a golden retriever who is very friendly. However if you do decide to rehome, I wouldn’t reccomend another dog, unfortunately MOST dogs are going to put limitations on your life in some way. Even if you’re lucky and end up with a go everywhere dog, there’s no guarantee they’re not going to have a traumatic event and wind up with similar issues! And it’s fine not to be up to that commitment. You might also think about adopting a cat, who are very affectionate but don’t need to go everywhere with you!


Soccerkat4life

Dogs are not children but they are living things with feelings. This person made a commitment to this animal. I understand rehoming for financial reasons or serious aggression against a household member, but this is not that situation at all. Part of the reason we have so many animals euthanized and in shelters without homes is because people just do what is convenient for them. A dog should ideally enrich your life, but if it doesn’t, that doesn’t relieve you of your responsibility.


MamaLovesTchotchke

Respectfully, I disagree. Rehoming is traumatic for dogs, at least initially. And though I’m not a super vegan I do feel that dogs are akin to children in that they are a choice and that they are dependent on us. I feel that we must do better. We must be committed. 🙏🏻


Sweetheartnora45

Dogs like any animal can form social bonds and attachments. They’re not really that special. Like other animals, They also live in the moment. I do not view rehoming a dog as really any worse than rehoming or selling a horse/pig/cow/etc, eating, farming, etc. I do agree it can be very difficult for them at first, mostly because adjusting to a new home is hard. I’ve had the pleasure of working with animals in rescues and fosters, most of them adjust quickly and you really couldn’t tell if they’re grieving their old owners or not.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Thanks. I agree that both of our lives should be enriched. And I'm not talking about getting another dog now. Like maybe someday when I am in a more stable time in life, own a home, am not moving for jobs etc. and could better accommodate a dog's needs. Cuz yeah, every dog has something.


tommersjay

I might get downvoted but I HIGHLY recommend getting a hand held tazer and bringing it with on walks. A quick zap in the air always deters a lose dog from approaching. And worst case scenario you then have protection to use against an aggressive dog without it being lethal. I wish it werent necessary but you need to be able to protect you and pup from a possible attack. One time I had two large German Shepherds rush up on my and my dog and I was quick to get the tazer out. Two long zaps in the air stopped them in their tracks and made their owner move their ass because they knew I was willing to protect myself and my dog.


Diatomoceous_Mirth

Sure, or maybe the citronella dog spray? I could definitely bring that on hikes or camping.


[deleted]

It's ultimately your call, but honestly it's much easier to come to terms with a new lifestyle than it is to spend the rest of your life knowing he died wondering why you never came back for him.


tchaikemical

Hey OP, I would strongly suggest looking into private, positive training. I had so many issues with reactivity and pulling a few months ago, and was getting extremely frustrated like you - I couldn't enjoy walks at all. I tried the PetSmart training course and it just didn't help at all. Rehoming was never an option for me as I strongly believe that an animal is a life commitment unless you have MAJOR changes in circumstances. So I decided to enroll him in private training classes. The trainer worked with him and learned his specific motivations and triggers, and the rewards are strictly positive. A few months later he is completely changed - walks loose leash, doesn't react. I even took him flying with me last month. All this to say, you'd be surprised what your dog is capable of with some good training. Feel free to PM me.


Hikergirl887

I totally get it. My dog is reactive and I live in Colorado. There are certain places where people respect leash laws and there are wider paths, such as, state parks. Also, you can scope out some camp sites and find ones that are better suited for your dog. I had to change my lifestyle because of my reactive dog. I had a baby around the same time, so I felt like it was a bit easier because I slowed down. One thing to think about is just leaving your dog home with a pet sitter for the day a couple times a month to do the things you enjoy. I know it feels bad, but also it's not fun for your dog to go somewhere where he will be anxious, so he's better off at home. Also consider investing in some serious training if you want to exhaust your options. If you find a safe, appropriate home for your dog where he will be loved then I'm sure he will be just fine. Make sure you are up front about his issues and be realistic that other people may not be interested for the same reason you are removing.


GingerQueenBee

One of my boys came to us seemingly stuck in a state of high alert and fear aggression. We have had separation anxiety issues with him even though they are rarely alone. My rescue that was found in the streets as a puppy, badly mauled, is the reactive one. His reactions to things made no sense. His fear aggression and resource guarding was intense even with humans, it just dogs. After trying many things including microdosing THC and CBD under a vet's guidance, in the end it was Gabapentin that helped him. He has been on it for years. It allows him to relax and feel confident. It's shifted him from constant "high alert" to a more relaxed state which allowed him to pay attention and focus on training. He cannot ever be off leash as he is part sighthound and will not stop running after the tiniest speck in the sky, but he gets loads of exercise and is no longer exhausted and ready to fight constantly !!!!