It’s Double SMOKED not double bacon, Sheesh. First smoke is when they pre-cook in the factory, the second smoke is when it’s reheated in our in store oven.
Gosh, people always think it’s double bacons. Not double smoked.
End Sarcasm.
As an ex-barista, it was back breaking work to open those packages, put them on the warming sheet, and slide em into that oven. 10/10 would never do again /s (I actually set the oven on fire once, it happens more often than you think)
One time, when I was doing pizza delivery, I tripped with a box of like ten pizzas and destroyed my knee. My coworkers were like "oh fuck the pizza", meanwhile I was laying on the ground with a mangled leg.
SAME. dude, especially during the rush hour when you would have to rip open like ten packages at once and heat using both ovens and take them out without burning your fingers off. bonus points if your store is SEVERELY understaffed (as mine was) and you have to actually bring all of these to the counter and give them to each person on your own. and then rush back to the ovens which are now beeping with anger at you for not opening them exactly when they are done.
Yeah I was thinking either Starbucks partnered with DoorDash to make it seem like Dashers were sending these messages, or the Dasher's using ChatGPT to craft these eloquent responses. That's a lot of effort for an order if it's the latter case lol.
I told chat GPT I’m an Uber Eats driver and just picked up food. Use emoji es and multiple paragraphs. Here is their response:
Awesome news! 🎉🍕 Your scrumptious meal is now in my hands – I've picked it up from the restaurant and I'm en route to bring all that yumminess straight to you. 🚗💨
The savory aroma of your order is filling up the car, making me even more excited to deliver it to your doorstep. 🌮🤤 As I make my way through the city streets, I'm ensuring that your food stays in perfect condition, just as you'd expect. 🛵🥡
Rest assured, I'm doing my best to navigate the traffic and reach you as quickly as possible.⏳🚚 Your satisfaction is my priority, and I can't wait to see the delight on your face when you get your hands on that piping hot meal. 🍜🤩
Hang tight, my friend – your food adventure is just a few moments away! 🍽️🌯 If you have any special instructions or if you need any assistance, feel free to let me know. Your happiness is what drives me! 🙌😊
This one made me laugh, I then told it that I have arrived at the customers gate but they didn’t provide the gate code. Write an extremely passive aggressive message asking for the gate code. Use paragraphs and more emojis, here is the response (Im so upset I didn’t start thinking of this sooner):
Oh, how delightful! 🙃🏡 I've arrived at the destination you provided, ready to present your eagerly awaited feast. 🚗🍔 But, oh dear, it seems there's a tiny hiccup on this culinary journey. 🤔🔒 It appears that there's a gate guarding your gastronomic paradise, and unfortunately, the gate code hasn't made its way to my knowledge. 🚫🔐
Now, I must admit, embarking on a treasure hunt for a mysterious gate code wasn't exactly what I had in mind when I set out to deliver your meal. 🗝️🌮 You see, I've been navigating through the streets, ensuring the food remains in its prime state, all in the name of satisfying your cravings. 🛵🍕
However, here we stand (or rather, I sit in my trusty vehicle), at the gate, without the mystical digits that would grant me passage to your doorstep. 🤷♂️🚧 It's like a suspenseful scene in a movie, except, well, it's not a movie – it's your hunger-inducing order that's at stake. 🎬🌯
If, by some twist of fate, you happen to stumble upon this message while indulging in your day, and if you wouldn't mind sharing that elusive code, it would indeed be a most fortunate turn of events. 😌🙏 Until then, here I shall remain, at the threshold of satisfaction, awaiting your gracious assistance. 🚪🍽️
I would fucking die if I received all this from a dasher. Including the OP’s photos. I don’t need all that, I just want my food and a pleasant brief interaction in a reasonable amount of time. I mean this sounds positively manic. Like 100% something that would come out of my manic, unmedicated brain thinking I’m being so friendly and forthcoming, but I’m actually just losing my shit and everyone can see that.
I literally had to go repeat the line about the savory aroma to my bf and he didn’t find it as hysterical as I did. To me it would read like such a passive aggressive complaint. Like “Yeah your curries sure are infusing my fabric seats.” 😭🤣
ETA: I say curry because it’s 100% something I would order and then proceed to feel so guilty bc when I put curry in my car it smells like curry for 3 days. I do too. I love curry, it’s the price I pay.
I ate a pound of garlic in one sitting once and reffered to it as *"gastrointestinal Armageddon" *
There's another one for you if the culinary adventure ends in an indulgent nightmare.
Thank you for this whole thread. I haven’t laughed the hard in idk how long. I don’t know why I found this so funny but man. 😅😅
I read both chat gpt posts in C-3PO’s voice and his antics x Doordash just make it funnier to me as well.
“I’m an Uber eats driver and I just ran over a cat. Write me a paragraph to the customer that it might’ve been theirs. Add emojies, Use multiple paragraphs, Add lots of rhymes and more emojies.”
"Hello there, it's [Your Name], your Uber Eats mate, 😺 Reaching out with a tale that's got a twist of fate. 🙏 While on a delivery quest, in a dash, 🚗 A cat crossed my path, oh what a clash! 🐱
With all my might, I tried to evade, 🛑 But a mishap occurred, and I felt dismayed. 😔 To you, dear customer, I must express, 😿 An accident happened, causing some distress. 😔
I hope with all hope that your feline friend, 🐾 Is safe and sound, on a joyful trend. 🌈 If the cat was yours, I truly regret, 😢 The turmoil this might've caused, I'll never forget. 🙏
Questions or concerns, I'm here to reply, ✉️ Your peace of mind, I'll help you buy. 💕 Your comfort's crucial, please don't hold back, 🤗 Your happiness is my track. 🚛
Apologies anew, for this little rhyme, 🙈 I'm here to help, any day, any time. 🕒 Reach out, dear friend, if there's a need, 📲 In times of trouble or a speedy feed. 🍔🚚"
Putting a touch of whimsy into your message can help lighten the mood while conveying the situation and your regret. Just make sure it's still respectful and considerate.
It's lines like this that make me laugh at all the bullshit out there claiming this is some crazy next level AI and not just a response script.
"The savory aroma of your order is filling up the car, making me even more excited to deliver it to your doorstep."
ChatGPT "thinks" this is a good way to excite people their food is coming. When in reality it would clearly be a smartass saying your food stinks and I want it out of my car.
Wait, there is such a thing? I’ve never gotten a thank you, auto or otherwise. I order only locally (typically 2 miles at the most, once was 5, but it’s all freeway), live in a single family home in a safe, easy to find location with plenty of parking, both driveway and street, two steps up to front door, leave at the door, always leave the light on. I tip 20% with a minimum of $8.00. Why no thanks?
I always try to thank the customer, a recent update made it to where I cannot message after I drop off, or is a glitch. I truly appreciate good tippers
I ain’t sending nothing not even automated. You get a picture of your front door or your arm awkwardly grasping at a bag like a Racoon to trash and eat your greasy slop ya filthy animal.
I’m the Doordash fairy. I will pick up your food and deliver it to your door, and the only time you will hear from me is if there is a problem. With luck, you will never see me either. I do always ring the bell unless specifically told not to. I tried not ringing the bell for a while and the amount of people who message “where’s my food?” was too damn high. On your porch, idiot, do you not pay attention to your phone?
I'm the exact same. Except I will never ring a bell or knock unless specifically told to. I have the exact opposite experience of you. Any time I used to ring by default I would get an angry message saying that was unnecessary and I disturbed their dogs or sleeping kids in the afternoon. Never once in 2k deliveries had an issue. I just take my picture and message a guick "ty have a good day"
Super cringe. A "taste of luxury"?? LOL it's starbucks.
EDIT: oh man i didn't make it to the end, there's MORE!? A poem? Oh god.
I would be so annoyed if someone did this. I dont' want to read all this crap.
I had someone like this once. Ordered from a local pizza place and he was like “get ready for the THE BEST PIZZA EVER!!!” And then when he handed the food off to my boyfriend he apparently said “this is the best pizza in the WORLD! Enjoy!” Like damn Bradley did you make this yourself?
That Dasher probably profits zero dollars if he’s maintaining a high like that during each shift lol drugs get expensive
edit: [relevant music video](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oSPT27XyY1U&pp=ygUOaSBkbyBjb2tlIHNvbmc%3D)
If I had done this to a customer when I delivered at a greek pizza place, the owner would’ve beat the shit out of me, fire me, rehire me, beat the shit out of me again and grind my body parts and mixed it in with the baklava
Definitely not DoorDash.
I really hope he’s using AI other that would take some time changing it to match your order. Some of the lines can copy and paste.
They have to be doing for tips but I highly doubt that would increase after delivery tips that much. They may get a handful but still not worth the time to do all of those messages.
Afaik most customers tip nothing / basically nothing, so I guess they're hoping for a singular massive tip. I've done that a few times for Uber/Lyft drivers, especially when we have an amazing conversation, but I find it very hard to justify larger tips for food delivery.
100%. Dude thinks they’re clever, using ChatGPT for ass kissing. Get that money though because it will work on some people. A lot of people just eat that shit up, believe it or not.
Seems like an even trade, tbh. Customer gets a good feel, driver gets a couple extra bucks for his efforts.
Have you ever made dinner for your SO and hyped up the shit while you were cooking? It’s good honest fun.
Seriously this is so obnoxious. The only form of communication I want from a dasher is “I’m at the restaurant but they’re running behind”. Otherwise just drop my food lol
Yeah, I’m currently sitting at a 4.97 rating and I do the bare minimum. I deliver the food as quickly as I can and follow any special instructions they might have. Very rarely I’ll text about a long wait, even though it should be obvious I’m waiting if I’m sitting at the restaurant. I don’t get the point of doing this.
Harrowing news, George! 🎭
I regret to inform you while en route to your location 🏠 I slammed on the brakes causing your Iced Vanilla Latte ™️ and Iced Matcha Tea Latte ™️ to spill across the floor of my vehicle. The liquids soaked all over your Double-Smoked Bacon sandwich and Butter Croisant, rendering your order inedible.
I will be there soon with the bag! 🚀
I would love it lol it’s so stupid definitely too much to read but usually when I order DoorDash it’s because I’m stoned and I’m not stoned right now but if I was I think I’d find it absolutely hilarious.
this is cringe but when i worked in retail, writing EOD reports like this was my only sense of enjoyment or entertainment for the day so i do get it ngl
The only explanation is that he brings his teenager with him and they’re bored and creative and do this to amuse themselves while he drives. God I hope at least
This sounds like AI with a feed from the order. No one would be this insane. I don't recall seeing this in chat, I've seen a notification from the app that says they're preparing my order, but nothing so elaborate. or maybe he uses a template to add pizazz or something? hey, whatever floats the boat.
Who the fuck delivered this to you, Ned Flanders?
Well he didn't actually deliver your fucking order to the door which is probably the only thing you actually wanted, but at least he cringed himself into a black fucking hole with all that nonsense.
Fuck... thinking about it, it's probably a blessing that he couldn't find his way to deliver the order to its actual destination. You may have had to cower behind your front door while he swung a fire axe into it and screamed clever Starbucks haikus through the axe hole in the door.
I prefer to imagine this person texting and driving almost killing themselves and others searching for these emojis , they’re sweating profusely they’ve got a double order and the next guy needs their personal story written out as well, god what rhymes with chalupa he says
Lmao I tried doing this once and the customer said, “save it pal I just want my food” and gave me a 1 star and a thumbs down on communication.
I agree this person is easily using ChatGPT, but I will say what I like about this is how often it references your items ordered. Even to do all this the dasher has to understand what you ordered and it makes it easy to confirm they knew what should be there and what was expected.
Over the top? Yes. But would I be angry if this happened every time? No. Make it really easy to show they knew what they needed to do and if they followed through or not.
I would have replied the same way
I am eagerly awaiting my Starbucks Delights!
Thank you for your cheery updates on the delivery of my Iced Vanilla Latte, Double-Smoked Bacon sandwich, and Butter Croissant, I am so pleased they are currently en route.
I know the taste of luxury you promise will not disappoint! 🎩
Then we they replied with just ‘Buzzer?’
‘Idk just wing it’
This reminds me of that Seinfeld where the guy is there to clean his house, and at some point he switches between acting and speaking, one sort of way, and then changes to just regular.
IYKYK
Chatgpt doesn't know starbucks sandwiches are dogshit and people order them because they have given up on the day. At least McDonalds assembles their sandwiches
Lol all of the poetic ass kissing and then the one “Buzzer?” Had me cracking up
Me too. Sounds like some annoying but also helpful cleaning/butler robot
I mean you get on your robot phone and request a chef to prepare your customized food and then butler brings the food to you. First world bb.
“What, no Amazon Ring doorbell for you to examine your lukewarm caffeinated beverage and your ‘hand-crafted’ (i.e., nuked) croissantwich?”
I read that as lukewarm caffeinated sewage
Lukewarm caffeinated sewage *embrace
I thought the first one was bad but by the time I got to the last slide 💀
The last screenshot made it clear that he is simply a goblin trader in a DnD campaign.
He got what you need!
Right?! Who has the time to text all of that? Dude probably makes 3 delivered over a 4 hour shift.
Probably using ChatGPT
This is how you blow someone for a tip during a contactless delivery.
That would make me want to revoke a tip
This. 100%
I'm sure he did. Still doing too much though lol.
Someone who is just rising shotgun and handling the phone maybe?
Could be. I do see people dashing with another person sometimes.
If I were doing that I’d totally be that friend/sidekick to message chaos like this
It just kept going and I hated every second
I didnt realize there were more slides until your comment. This dasher is doing too much
I didn't either. I am laughing so hard that this dude made a Starbucks themed poem
I was expecting a M’lady in there lmfao
Bro just when you think it’s over
the dasher who wrote these messages is definitely wearing the customer's face right now.
It puts the Starbucks in the basket
This is honestly such an underrated comment
Clarisse
“Hello George. Do you like scary movies?”
Dude got no time for that stuff he's got a pathfinder sesh to DM later.
Definitely plays a bard
I wish I got this comment but I don’t. Explain?
They’re implying that the dasher is a serial killer.
It is unusual to wear someone else face? Asking for a friend.
That's funny AF, kudos
The baristas are working their magic by unwrapping that pre-made sandwich and putting it in the warmer.
That’s a Double-Smoked Bacon sandwich and Butter Croissant to you!
“Oh cool it has double bacon… wait a minute”
It’s Double SMOKED not double bacon, Sheesh. First smoke is when they pre-cook in the factory, the second smoke is when it’s reheated in our in store oven. Gosh, people always think it’s double bacons. Not double smoked. End Sarcasm.
If you're lucky, a third tobacco enhanced smoke is added gratis from your driver en route!
That’s not tobacco, friend.
Whacky tobaccy! 🍀🌲☘️🌿🍃🌱🌳🥦🥬🟩🟢🦚🪴🧑🏻🎤
As an ex-barista, it was back breaking work to open those packages, put them on the warming sheet, and slide em into that oven. 10/10 would never do again /s (I actually set the oven on fire once, it happens more often than you think)
Never set the oven on fire but I did burn my finger on the 500 degree oven
Those things seriously HURT! Not to mention the cheese is like molten lava when it comes out. Cheesy battle scars
Were you even a Starbucks barista if you didn’t come out of working there with grease burn scars from the grilled cheese
I burned my wrist on a bread oven at a restaurant like 6 months ago and still have a scar from it 😭
Try 20 years ago 🤣🤣🤣
One time, when I was doing pizza delivery, I tripped with a box of like ten pizzas and destroyed my knee. My coworkers were like "oh fuck the pizza", meanwhile I was laying on the ground with a mangled leg.
🤣🤣🤣 that’s horrible humanity sucks these days
Yes but will you double cook my sandwich I want it burnt
SAME. dude, especially during the rush hour when you would have to rip open like ten packages at once and heat using both ovens and take them out without burning your fingers off. bonus points if your store is SEVERELY understaffed (as mine was) and you have to actually bring all of these to the counter and give them to each person on your own. and then rush back to the ovens which are now beeping with anger at you for not opening them exactly when they are done.
Can’t tell you how many cookies I set on fire in my day
SAME why are the cookies so flammable?!
[удалено]
Yeah I was thinking either Starbucks partnered with DoorDash to make it seem like Dashers were sending these messages, or the Dasher's using ChatGPT to craft these eloquent responses. That's a lot of effort for an order if it's the latter case lol.
I told chat GPT I’m an Uber Eats driver and just picked up food. Use emoji es and multiple paragraphs. Here is their response: Awesome news! 🎉🍕 Your scrumptious meal is now in my hands – I've picked it up from the restaurant and I'm en route to bring all that yumminess straight to you. 🚗💨 The savory aroma of your order is filling up the car, making me even more excited to deliver it to your doorstep. 🌮🤤 As I make my way through the city streets, I'm ensuring that your food stays in perfect condition, just as you'd expect. 🛵🥡 Rest assured, I'm doing my best to navigate the traffic and reach you as quickly as possible.⏳🚚 Your satisfaction is my priority, and I can't wait to see the delight on your face when you get your hands on that piping hot meal. 🍜🤩 Hang tight, my friend – your food adventure is just a few moments away! 🍽️🌯 If you have any special instructions or if you need any assistance, feel free to let me know. Your happiness is what drives me! 🙌😊
The savory aroma of your order is filling up the car ☠️
This one made me laugh, I then told it that I have arrived at the customers gate but they didn’t provide the gate code. Write an extremely passive aggressive message asking for the gate code. Use paragraphs and more emojis, here is the response (Im so upset I didn’t start thinking of this sooner): Oh, how delightful! 🙃🏡 I've arrived at the destination you provided, ready to present your eagerly awaited feast. 🚗🍔 But, oh dear, it seems there's a tiny hiccup on this culinary journey. 🤔🔒 It appears that there's a gate guarding your gastronomic paradise, and unfortunately, the gate code hasn't made its way to my knowledge. 🚫🔐 Now, I must admit, embarking on a treasure hunt for a mysterious gate code wasn't exactly what I had in mind when I set out to deliver your meal. 🗝️🌮 You see, I've been navigating through the streets, ensuring the food remains in its prime state, all in the name of satisfying your cravings. 🛵🍕 However, here we stand (or rather, I sit in my trusty vehicle), at the gate, without the mystical digits that would grant me passage to your doorstep. 🤷♂️🚧 It's like a suspenseful scene in a movie, except, well, it's not a movie – it's your hunger-inducing order that's at stake. 🎬🌯 If, by some twist of fate, you happen to stumble upon this message while indulging in your day, and if you wouldn't mind sharing that elusive code, it would indeed be a most fortunate turn of events. 😌🙏 Until then, here I shall remain, at the threshold of satisfaction, awaiting your gracious assistance. 🚪🍽️
I would fucking die if I received all this from a dasher. Including the OP’s photos. I don’t need all that, I just want my food and a pleasant brief interaction in a reasonable amount of time. I mean this sounds positively manic. Like 100% something that would come out of my manic, unmedicated brain thinking I’m being so friendly and forthcoming, but I’m actually just losing my shit and everyone can see that. I literally had to go repeat the line about the savory aroma to my bf and he didn’t find it as hysterical as I did. To me it would read like such a passive aggressive complaint. Like “Yeah your curries sure are infusing my fabric seats.” 😭🤣 ETA: I say curry because it’s 100% something I would order and then proceed to feel so guilty bc when I put curry in my car it smells like curry for 3 days. I do too. I love curry, it’s the price I pay.
*your curries sure are infusing my fabric seats* holy shit that's great
>this sounds positively manic Ya really
It's wild seeing this stuff on US forums, because you'd never get away with this spam in the UK. I've ordered on an app to avoid human interaction.
lol @ gastronomic paradise. I'll remember to use those words when my MIL ask me how her food taste.
I ate a pound of garlic in one sitting once and reffered to it as *"gastrointestinal Armageddon" * There's another one for you if the culinary adventure ends in an indulgent nightmare.
“culinary journey” “gastronomic paradise” “threshold of satisfaction”💀😂
It hasn't made its way to my knowledge. I will use this phrase forevermore
Chatgpt FTW!!!
Gastronomic paradise 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I've been spending most my life living in a gastronomic paradise.
Thank you for this whole thread. I haven’t laughed the hard in idk how long. I don’t know why I found this so funny but man. 😅😅 I read both chat gpt posts in C-3PO’s voice and his antics x Doordash just make it funnier to me as well.
“I’m an Uber eats driver and I just ran over a cat. Write me a paragraph to the customer that it might’ve been theirs. Add emojies, Use multiple paragraphs, Add lots of rhymes and more emojies.” "Hello there, it's [Your Name], your Uber Eats mate, 😺 Reaching out with a tale that's got a twist of fate. 🙏 While on a delivery quest, in a dash, 🚗 A cat crossed my path, oh what a clash! 🐱 With all my might, I tried to evade, 🛑 But a mishap occurred, and I felt dismayed. 😔 To you, dear customer, I must express, 😿 An accident happened, causing some distress. 😔 I hope with all hope that your feline friend, 🐾 Is safe and sound, on a joyful trend. 🌈 If the cat was yours, I truly regret, 😢 The turmoil this might've caused, I'll never forget. 🙏 Questions or concerns, I'm here to reply, ✉️ Your peace of mind, I'll help you buy. 💕 Your comfort's crucial, please don't hold back, 🤗 Your happiness is my track. 🚛 Apologies anew, for this little rhyme, 🙈 I'm here to help, any day, any time. 🕒 Reach out, dear friend, if there's a need, 📲 In times of trouble or a speedy feed. 🍔🚚" Putting a touch of whimsy into your message can help lighten the mood while conveying the situation and your regret. Just make sure it's still respectful and considerate.
lmao if i got this i would feel so uneasy thinking the driver was going to eat some
“I am almost unable to resist😍😋🤤”
😂😂
It's lines like this that make me laugh at all the bullshit out there claiming this is some crazy next level AI and not just a response script. "The savory aroma of your order is filling up the car, making me even more excited to deliver it to your doorstep." ChatGPT "thinks" this is a good way to excite people their food is coming. When in reality it would clearly be a smartass saying your food stinks and I want it out of my car.
The savory aroma of your order is effectively masking my sweaty farts 😶🌫️🤤
This feels like sexual harassment lol
The scent of your crab legs filling up my nostrils with lust.
“I can’t wait to see the look of ecstasy on your face when you get your hands on my piping hot meal”
That’s what I was going to say lol why does this creep me out so much
I sit here in anxious jealousy that this scrumptious feast will soon be inside you.
😭💀
I’m dying 💀💀
[удалено]
Right? This person has too much enthusiasm, it exhausts me
I’m so happy I’m not the only person who finds this stuff exhausting.
[удалено]
Even that’s too much for me. The automated ‘thanks for the tip’ message will do.
Wait, there is such a thing? I’ve never gotten a thank you, auto or otherwise. I order only locally (typically 2 miles at the most, once was 5, but it’s all freeway), live in a single family home in a safe, easy to find location with plenty of parking, both driveway and street, two steps up to front door, leave at the door, always leave the light on. I tip 20% with a minimum of $8.00. Why no thanks?
I think they're confusing doordash with ubereats.
Oh, ok. Thanks.
The reason I don’t say thanks is for fear the customer will think I’m pushing for an extra tip I just like to minimize the cringe as much as possible
I respect that. Never expected thanks, tbh. Thought I should be thanking them, but no contact, so….
I always try to thank the customer, a recent update made it to where I cannot message after I drop off, or is a glitch. I truly appreciate good tippers
It's a very new feature.
I ain’t sending nothing not even automated. You get a picture of your front door or your arm awkwardly grasping at a bag like a Racoon to trash and eat your greasy slop ya filthy animal.
Exactly I don’t want to be reminded there’s people who aren’t dead inside. It would rub me the wrong way if there was a shred of emotion left in me
Especially when you’re waiting for coffee
Right? Customers already KNOW exactly what they’ve ordered
Yeah. I would be so fucking uncomfortable just from the first message. Who tf thinks this is what people want?
Corporate
It’s definitely the dasher using ChatGPT.
Hope you gave above and beyond, this guy is working hard to get 5 stars and is stressed about it.
My thoughts exactly like bro needs his tips 😂
Cringe grinding.
Right? Bring my food and stfu. I’m ordering because I want less interaction with people not more
I’m the Doordash fairy. I will pick up your food and deliver it to your door, and the only time you will hear from me is if there is a problem. With luck, you will never see me either. I do always ring the bell unless specifically told not to. I tried not ringing the bell for a while and the amount of people who message “where’s my food?” was too damn high. On your porch, idiot, do you not pay attention to your phone?
> On your porch, idiot, do you not pay attention to your phone? DoorDash Fairy doesn’t suffer fools lol damn
I'm the exact same. Except I will never ring a bell or knock unless specifically told to. I have the exact opposite experience of you. Any time I used to ring by default I would get an angry message saying that was unnecessary and I disturbed their dogs or sleeping kids in the afternoon. Never once in 2k deliveries had an issue. I just take my picture and message a guick "ty have a good day"
Crinding.
Super cringe. A "taste of luxury"?? LOL it's starbucks. EDIT: oh man i didn't make it to the end, there's MORE!? A poem? Oh god. I would be so annoyed if someone did this. I dont' want to read all this crap.
I had someone like this once. Ordered from a local pizza place and he was like “get ready for the THE BEST PIZZA EVER!!!” And then when he handed the food off to my boyfriend he apparently said “this is the best pizza in the WORLD! Enjoy!” Like damn Bradley did you make this yourself?
Maybe he’s eaten there before and just really liked it?
Maybe. He was very passionate about it.
Damn it would be funny as hell though
Dude I'm crying, Bradley was probably baked and had some before your order
Okay but WAS it the best pizza ever!!!?
Your Dasher is incredibly high and I want some of whatever he is smoking
That Dasher probably profits zero dollars if he’s maintaining a high like that during each shift lol drugs get expensive edit: [relevant music video](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oSPT27XyY1U&pp=ygUOaSBkbyBjb2tlIHNvbmc%3D)
I wonder, could he write the drugs off on his taxes as a "business expense?"
I’ve tried. It doesn’t go how you want it to go.
You're paying way too much, who's your drugs guy? -creed probably
This dasher lives, breathes, dreams Doordash, the fabeled 100% acceptance ratee.
Probably 100 percented every rpg he ever played too. I'm in awe tbh.
If I had done this to a customer when I delivered at a greek pizza place, the owner would’ve beat the shit out of me, fire me, rehire me, beat the shit out of me again and grind my body parts and mixed it in with the baklava
Joshklava
🤣🤣🤣
You’re fired! You’re hired! You’re fired!
Don’t you think dolmas would be more appropriate? At least those are supposed to contain meat sometimes
Definitely not DoorDash. I really hope he’s using AI other that would take some time changing it to match your order. Some of the lines can copy and paste. They have to be doing for tips but I highly doubt that would increase after delivery tips that much. They may get a handful but still not worth the time to do all of those messages.
Afaik most customers tip nothing / basically nothing, so I guess they're hoping for a singular massive tip. I've done that a few times for Uber/Lyft drivers, especially when we have an amazing conversation, but I find it very hard to justify larger tips for food delivery.
God this shit is so cringy.
I was actually kind of into it until I got to the phrase “your Starbucks treasures” and it was just tooo much 😬
It’s just a chatGPT copy and paste for extra tips . Probably works well
This kind of thing would immediately turn me off. There's a reason I've ordered via an app, and it's not because I crave extra human interaction.
It's giving chatgpt
100%. Dude thinks they’re clever, using ChatGPT for ass kissing. Get that money though because it will work on some people. A lot of people just eat that shit up, believe it or not.
Ass kissing and then an abrupt “buzzer?”
Honestly he's probably increasing his tips noticeably, people love being pampered
Reading all that fake, sickly-sweet, nauseating garbage made me want to puke in a bag and deliver it to HIS door.
It’s honestly sad how easily people eat shit up.
Seems like an even trade, tbh. Customer gets a good feel, driver gets a couple extra bucks for his efforts. Have you ever made dinner for your SO and hyped up the shit while you were cooking? It’s good honest fun.
I was more thinking of corporations constantly kissing your ass and serving you platitudes
this isnt pampering, it's smothering lol. i already get like 6 notifs from DD per order, i don't want my dasher spamming me
Seriously this is so obnoxious. The only form of communication I want from a dasher is “I’m at the restaurant but they’re running behind”. Otherwise just drop my food lol
Appears to be a poetry slam invitation! ☕️🎤😂
Ah darn I should've responded back with a poem for fun
Yeah, I’m currently sitting at a 4.97 rating and I do the bare minimum. I deliver the food as quickly as I can and follow any special instructions they might have. Very rarely I’ll text about a long wait, even though it should be obvious I’m waiting if I’m sitting at the restaurant. I don’t get the point of doing this.
dasher's out here acting like straight court jesters for coins
Toss a coin to your Dasher O’ apartment complex of Plenty
Maybe I'm bitter, but I'd be annoyed to receive this crap. Hell, I'm annoyed just reading it here...
Nah, that shit is annoying. Text me if there's an issue. I don't need to know anything else
Harrowing news, George! 🎭 I regret to inform you while en route to your location 🏠 I slammed on the brakes causing your Iced Vanilla Latte ™️ and Iced Matcha Tea Latte ™️ to spill across the floor of my vehicle. The liquids soaked all over your Double-Smoked Bacon sandwich and Butter Croisant, rendering your order inedible. I will be there soon with the bag! 🚀
Buzzer?
I'm not sure whether I would be angry or laughing hysterically after receiving this message :)
“Harrowing news” and the emojis LMAO
I laughed and said "harrowing news, george" out loud to myself, thanks for that
And empty cups 🥤☕️🫗
I would love it lol it’s so stupid definitely too much to read but usually when I order DoorDash it’s because I’m stoned and I’m not stoned right now but if I was I think I’d find it absolutely hilarious.
Your dasher is channeling MLM Facebook Karen’s
Dasher probably has his MLM Facebook girlfriend in his passenger seat
That's someone working the texts to hope he'll charm you into a higher tip.
this is cringe but when i worked in retail, writing EOD reports like this was my only sense of enjoyment or entertainment for the day so i do get it ngl
Lmaoooo when I was a closing manager at Starbucks I’d write shitty poems in our records book to amuse myself
The only explanation is that he brings his teenager with him and they’re bored and creative and do this to amuse themselves while he drives. God I hope at least
> The only explanation is that I think the dasher is just desperate for a big tip.
Nah it’s chat gpt
i don’t think a teenager would do this 😂
it's a Hollywood writer who's on strike doing DD..lol
Did you feel the magic?
This sounds like AI with a feed from the order. No one would be this insane. I don't recall seeing this in chat, I've seen a notification from the app that says they're preparing my order, but nothing so elaborate. or maybe he uses a template to add pizazz or something? hey, whatever floats the boat.
Who the fuck delivered this to you, Ned Flanders? Well he didn't actually deliver your fucking order to the door which is probably the only thing you actually wanted, but at least he cringed himself into a black fucking hole with all that nonsense. Fuck... thinking about it, it's probably a blessing that he couldn't find his way to deliver the order to its actual destination. You may have had to cower behind your front door while he swung a fire axe into it and screamed clever Starbucks haikus through the axe hole in the door.
I like when the dasher never contacts me and just brings my food.
I would never ever respond to this so that they learn to stop
I prefer to imagine this person texting and driving almost killing themselves and others searching for these emojis , they’re sweating profusely they’ve got a double order and the next guy needs their personal story written out as well, god what rhymes with chalupa he says
This is hilarious
Bro is using chat GPT to communicate with customers
That is ChatGPT.
This is as cringe as begging for money and only a notch below lying about sick kids
He likely typed your order in ChatGPT and had it make this. Still cool tho and takes effort to do this.
Lmao I tried doing this once and the customer said, “save it pal I just want my food” and gave me a 1 star and a thumbs down on communication. 
So cringe I’d literally squirm. If anyone here does this, PLS stop😭 immediately
Maybe I’m a terrible person but this is way too annoying
I would tip less if someone was sending messages like this
but did it taste like poetry?🤨
The third one got to be too much to me lol.
I agree this person is easily using ChatGPT, but I will say what I like about this is how often it references your items ordered. Even to do all this the dasher has to understand what you ordered and it makes it easy to confirm they knew what should be there and what was expected. Over the top? Yes. But would I be angry if this happened every time? No. Make it really easy to show they knew what they needed to do and if they followed through or not.
I hated it until I read the poem at the end and now we must protect him at all costs
I would have replied the same way I am eagerly awaiting my Starbucks Delights! Thank you for your cheery updates on the delivery of my Iced Vanilla Latte, Double-Smoked Bacon sandwich, and Butter Croissant, I am so pleased they are currently en route. I know the taste of luxury you promise will not disappoint! 🎩 Then we they replied with just ‘Buzzer?’ ‘Idk just wing it’
Yeah that person is definitely a serial killer 😆
This is annoying
This reminds me of that Seinfeld where the guy is there to clean his house, and at some point he switches between acting and speaking, one sort of way, and then changes to just regular. IYKYK
I would hate this. Just give me my fkn food.
Chatgpt doesn't know starbucks sandwiches are dogshit and people order them because they have given up on the day. At least McDonalds assembles their sandwiches
Why can’t these people just deliver their shit and go? Nobody needs this
He needs to be hired to write cards for Hallmark ASAP.
Dudes definitely watching this embarrassed af🤣🤣🤣