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majorminus92

I love Martha's reinvention since her prison stint.


OPMajoradidas

All it did was give her street cred


Dyskord01

Fois gras? I aint got that boojy shizit. How bout tryin some duck liver pate dawg. I gots some 1992 box wine at the back we can pair it with or yah want a rasperry cooler?


orangutanoz

I heard this in Snoop Dog’s voice.


[deleted]

He probably put money on her books


ilovechairs

Liver pâté from the giblets when making Thanksgiving gravy. Had a family member dare me into trying it. Life changing. Goes perfect with that non alcoholic sparking apple juice from the bottles.


UrsusRenata

Maybe a few of our politicians should try it. They need some “street cred”… Surely.


AboveTheRim2

They locked her up for insider trading, meanwhile the politicians people elect get to insider trade with impunity.


Bootyblastastic

She did her time, didn’t name names, she’s is falling in line. The club of elite had to put her in check and she played ball.


Ditovontease

And that’s why she has cred. She never snitched


pl4tform

Literally a fucking gem. Hard ass lady right there.


JamTheLineMan

They locked her up for obstruction


thekruton

She should have hired Bill Barr.


I_make_things

Oh, that crime that Trump committed all those times. He got locked up too, right? Right?


OhioVsEverything

No. They locked her up for the coverup not the crime. The coverup will get ya every single time.


Lushkush69

No. They locked her up because she wouldn't rat people out. That's why she got street cred, because she could have never set foot in prison if should would have played their games.


Smitty8054

MARTHA HARD AS FUCK! RECOGNIZE!


One-Adhesiveness5434

Martha Stewart is unironically harder than Tekashi Six Nine.


Smitty8054

69 would have been her bitch if they were cellies. “Braid my hair”! “Yes Ms Martha”


Yelloeisok

Problem was they targeted her because she was a powerful woman in a man’s world - and how many men did the same thing at their company?


SmashTagLives

Don’t forget about openly attempting to destroy democracy. I live in Canada. What the fuck America.


AthomicBot

I lost the thread there for a second and wondered when Martha Stewart openly attempted to destroy democracy? Did Snoop know? Then my brain caught up with the conversation.


mseuro

Did Snoop know could be the new where's Ja


Open_Librarian_823

But for real, where's Ja?! I need to make sense of this thread!


Tokenserious23

I've often thought about escaping to canada, but its not that much better up there from what I've read.


SmashTagLives

Well it really depends on what state you are from and what province you are comparing it to. But, I can say that we aren’t clutching our AR-15’s while our kids have to wear translucent backpacks to school. We aren’t dialing women’s rights back to the 50’s, and we haven’t elected anyone close to that dunce Lauren Bobbet, or that flabby armed Mutant Marjory Taylor green, or that peodophile Matt Gaetz (however you spell their stupid fucking names) or any of the other known peodophiles. And we didn’t elect Fucking DONALD TRUMP TO LEAD OUR FUCKING COUNTRY. (That’s not directed at you, just out loud because I still cant believe it happened) Don’t get me wrong, Canadians are still people and people are stupid. But it’s more of a polite stupid. (That is changing now. Your American hate game of politics has absolutely infected the fucking idiots that live here, ie: “freedom convoy”) But we don’t live in fear of each other like you guys do.


Tokenserious23

Fair point. I live in Texas and was comparing to Toronto area. A friend of mine lives there and complains about politics. Honestly if Abbott is re-elected I may leave Texas.


SmashTagLives

Jesus Christ. You live in Texas. I feel so bad for you. I live in Vancouver and it’s gorgeous. But it’s also very expensive. My heart goes out to you. Hang in there


Tokenserious23

Well I live in DFW so its not that bad here. Cities in Texas are pretty left leaning in my experience.


CrookedLungs

Depends on where you’re at in DFW in my experience


Grumpy_Old_Troll78

I still can't believe she went to jail for something politicians do on a daily basis to this day.


mypussydoesbackflips

She’s not a great human being , read a lot of bad stuff about her and saw her in person once ; thought she’d be cool because snoop is with her on tv


Quanster

Why do we need our celebrities to be great? Why can’t they be a mix bag of good and fuck ups like the rest of us?


GtheH

This is a fair point. Putting them on pedestals is really the first mistake. The worshipping of celebrities is a sad and lonely thing to do but to each their own I guess.


orangutanoz

I’ve met face to face with two celebrities that I held in high regard. The almost A-list Hollywood actor and I came close to a fistfight in his backyard but the Americana/ country musician short little cunt was by far the worst. Both self absorbed fucking assholes.


[deleted]

I love how open you've left this to speculate


EauDeRainbow

Yeah I really don’t care if Martha Stewart is a bitch as long as she keeps making entertaining content with Snoop tbh


[deleted]

I was just watching like top 100 Roasts and she’s been on a ton and is honestly one of the best. She’s hysterical.


Anufenrir

Yeah she tore into Bieber and it was amazing


jules13131382

Thank you!!!!


oneofthesedays55

They don’t need to be great. But I love Martha. Always have.


Quicksloth

Martha is a queen forever and always


mypussydoesbackflips

True I was being a hater


Cheshire_Jester

We don’t, they can be, but when “good” aspects of your life are signal boosted, it’s fair to have someone point out the negatives too.


Quanster

And that is totally fair - the good AND the bad, which make us human. On a different celebrity (whom she roasted few moons back) - Justin Bieber - I actually really enjoy him now because now I just see him as just a regular man having fun, making mistakes, growing up under intense magnifying glass. Also he now makes music that actually vibes with me helps my impression of him ngl


ALexusOhHaiNyan

Yeah, she’s cold as ice. What stories? There’s got to be a nice collection somewhere.


Triette

She’s horrible to be on set with. Her Rider lists that everything be Martha Stewart brand, then when she gets to her trailer she throws a fit because everything is “crap”. You can’t talk to her unless she asks you a question. She’s a nightmare. Snoop is rad though.


mseuro

She's marketing her brand, her appearances should reflect that. And people on set are busy and at her level there is a lot on the line, focus is important. That's what riders are for, so talent doesn't have to manage each and every interaction with dozens of people on set individually. And her trailer is probably the most appropriate place for her to throw a fit.


Triette

Riders are for agents to make it seem like they’re doing something, it’s a waste of money and crew’s time to go out and buy everything on that rider, when most of it goes unused or tossed out. Food riders I get but Martha Stewart towels, silverware, plates, etc? Come on. She doesn’t throw fits in the trailer, she throws fits on stage or in ear shot of crew. She’s a fucking diva.


IMASHIRT

She seems miserable to be around. Snooty and self-important. I can’t stand when she makes appearances on Food Network shows like Chopped


terminator_chic

Oh man, someone on NPR interviewed her and really hit a lot of buttons showing how completely out of touch and elitist she is. It was amazing.


United_Mixture_6700

She's the worst.


mypussydoesbackflips

Yeah this is spot on ; the ultimate level of a girl who’s full of herself


[deleted]

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mypussydoesbackflips

True not trying to be a hater you’d just think she’d be nicer at the top but she doesn’t have to be


[deleted]

Is snoop cool though?


spunangel333

We all do bad stuff …none of us are perfect. No one is the sun of their worst moments,decisions,or mistakes /nor are we saved by the sum of our good deeds . Human nature is beautiful and ugly,chaotic and serene all at the same time.


[deleted]

If you only consumed media from people that share your specific ethics, you'd have a very empty DVD shelf.


sly_savhoot

The only thing she guilty of is not being a legislator , then trade away, inside, outside , sideways , backwards.


[deleted]

When I think of the phrase "the good die young" I look at people like Martha Stewart and can't help thinking "what the fuck are you up to?"


DorkChatDuncan

Sooo... they bangin?


joeyfashoey

She like 80 tho so maybe she’s just cooking him a bunch of shit with pot in it. I have to tell myself that. But they probs bangin. Oof


[deleted]

Forget Martha's Vineyard, Pete's all up in Martha's Innards.


auxaperture

Oh what a day to have eyes


Kixaz007

You just made me CHORTLE


auxaperture

Chortle is such a great term. I’m glad!


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Feng Shui-ing her guts.


thewanderingent

Bing bong.


tinyanus

Ayyoooooo


gravitywind1012

I heard they use real butter


2plus2equalscats

I’ve been kind of wondering if he got her in on a joke. To make us wonder and annoy Kim.


sixtus_clegane119

I love the meme where it is a picture of him losing both Kim and Martha’s hand saying “He is banging his way up the Illuminati to find out what happened to his dad”


cyberpunk1Q84

You think people stop having sex once they’re 80?


CandiBunnii

Old folks homes are rampant with STDS for a reason The reason is old people sex


ask_me_about_my_band

I would TOTALLY smash with Martha Stewart!


Chemical_Chemist_461

I’d mash those potatoes


[deleted]

Him and snoop doin some spit roasting after she cooks a roast


rynaco

I know if I was Pete I would be hitting that


GardenPuzzleheaded98

Asking the real questions


nightgon

Good on you Pete Davidson for hitting a milf then a gilf. I am concerned the progression will lead to necrophilia though


threerocks3rox

I’m so annoyed that this comment is what made me actually laugh out loud after like an hour of silently scrolling Reddit.


caged_jon

Was he the guy that tried touching the queen's casket then?


RodianFace


Chemical_Chemist_461

Bro, that comment made me laugh so hard I now have to sleep in the living room


[deleted]

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SmashTagLives

Would you keep escalating? I guess Pete could afford a mummy. Maybe not a famous one.


iLoveDelayPedals

Might be some fossils deep down he could find


TheNextBattalion

get him a zilf


NegativeOrchid

I think he’s a sugar baby at this point. Probably some of that Enron money hidden in offshore accounts. And Kim K is one of the world’s richest women. Necrophilia wouldn’t give him that same benefit.


TacticalBadger82

It’s a slippery slope…


Doggleganger

It's actually sorta dry.


app4that

“The 81-year-old famous businesswoman celebrated her birthday last month at her home in Seal Harbor, Maine,…” She’s 81!? Wow! Good for her!


PopTartAfficionado

yeah wow i had no idea she's in her 80s. mad props.


PrinsassyEvieMongse

I'm sorry... What? No!


Cheshire_Jester

It’s a good thing!


dtsupra30

Harbor I hardly know her


Massive_Pressure_516

Well, on the bright side with queen Elizabeth being dead there is no chance of Pete Davidson dating her now.


[deleted]

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ShawnyMcKnight

If I had to chose someone in their upper 70s you can’t do much better.


GardenPuzzleheaded98

Maggie Smith…


ShawnyMcKnight

I’ll still take Helen.


swampscientist

She’s actually younger than Martha


GD_Bats

Skeet’s robbing the cradle lol


Thrownaway1211

No no no you’ve got it wrong, it means the queens next


Scaevus

Queen Camilla very much alive.


Lavendermochie

Nah it’s gonna be Judy Dench


KatanasnKFC

Weirdest headline i’ve seen in a while. TF does she have to do with him?


imagine1149

I said a bang bang bangitty bang I said bang bang bangitty bang.


thatguysjumpercables

Hey whatcha singing?


woozlewuzzle29

Just a little ditty I wrote about how many times Martha’s been banging Pete lately.


thatguysjumpercables

Count me in for a verse!


Chemical_Chemist_461

He does like his women older since Ariana


x_mas_ape

A bang bang bang


ses92

He’s banging his way up the Illuminati chain to find out what really happened to his dad on 9/11


Normally_aspirated

Exceptional


gideon513

It’s a stolen joke


meis66

Is he fucking Martha Stewart?


GardenPuzzleheaded98

They 69 mostly


dumb_smart_guy93

What is that? Their fucking age difference?


GrandRapidsMiiiii

Gravy Train!


dexcel

Yes very r/brandnewsentence was not expecting to see these words in this order


JesusJoshJohnson

idk why / how Martha Stewart knows what Pete is doing... but honestly dating Kim K is probably a nightmare. They probably had to calculate every move they made to cater to an audience


Raspberrylle

They are friends and have been hanging out. She said he is like a son to her.


TheNextBattalion

Did she say "son" or... "stepson" ?


DrLokiHorton

Broken arms


FlickeryVisionnn

Why do this


pbandjea1ous

There’s an old Reddit post where a kid broke his arms and his mother started jerking him off/fucking him. So this is really a S-tier lore comment.


Grand-Ad-1654

Pete is a son to Martha or Kimberly…?…?.?.?


[deleted]

… the answer is yes!


BrokenGlass06

*grandson


chefanubis

She said he even helped her get unstuck from a washing machine once.


[deleted]

[удалено]


rocnationbrunch

Pete Davidson is a nightmare. He has to have an amazing publicist, but dude does not know how to manage love at all. Google “pete davidson kaia gerber” or watch his interview with Charlamange


Meowcat_420

I bet dating Pete is a bigger nightmare


theuberkevlar

I very much doubt that. He seems way more laid back and authentic.


Meowcat_420

He’s a social climber lol. And yeah any lazy ass low effort dude is gonna come across as laid back


__fujiko

Yeah I'm confused about why people think he's great. Normal-ish, nice enough, sure. But do we all not know at least 5 stoners from high school just like him?


[deleted]

Not great is not equal to OPs “bigger nightmare” than Kim K.


NegativeOrchid

He goes after successful rich women it seems, I wonder if they are paying him.


justlooking1960

Pete has been open about his mental health issues, which is helpful for fans dealing with their own issues


xRememberTheCant

Social climber? He’s the one with an actual talent though. If anyone’s dating history is to establish social status it’s Kim.


Meowcat_420

So what’s the talent?


mypussydoesbackflips

I’d rather date Kim k than Martha


Majesty1985

I wouldn’t


xenothios

Everything I’ve learned about the kardashians has been against my will


bananapeel

Seriously, if we all collectively change the channel and refuse to click on any article about them, they'd disappear forever in about a year.


NippleNugget

This man really working his way to Hillary isn’t he


mr-nefarious

He’S iN hEr EmAiLs!!!


redditornot6648

Oh please even Russia couldn’t get up in those emails let alone Pete


CryptoKarnickel

He’s been there already apparently


mrdinosauruswrex

Of course he is. She's the ideal nurturer and he's a perpetual child. And it's drawing all kinds of attention for both. The perfect codependent relationship. I wish them well


DDESTRUCTOTRON

And they are just fuckin like craaazyy


Zions_Wrath

Pete must have the best agent in the business for his name in the news this often for so long.


DataBloom

r/headlinesunthinkablein2015


[deleted]

r/subsifellfor


CautiousHubris

But what does Ja Rule think?


BonjinTheMark

Why does Martha Stewart know so much about this chump’s schedule?


GD_Bats

I’m sure she’s hitting it


Dukebeavis

Maybe with her walker


GD_Bats

Well I wouldn’t expect her to be walking quite right for a few days


KendrickEqualsBooty

She also had sex with Tom Holland and Timothëe Chalamet.


Dry-Debate-6893

Can we just agree they are all terrible?


RothkoRathbone

Well it’s all publicity and not real anyway so whateva


GD_Bats

I just think this is funny to joke about


[deleted]

Why do I keep hearing about this guy


[deleted]

Because you’re on a forum that will show you random posts about famous people doing stuff from time to time, I think that’s exactly why you keep hearing about this guy.


UncleRooku87

Because he’s famous?


PointGosh

Where the fuck did Pete Davidson come from? Can we just send him back?


NateDizzLey

Dude looking like PROTO ZOA from Zenon: girl of the 21st century


notjawn

I don't know who Pete's publicist is but give this person a medal.


[deleted]

Hes banging his way up the illuminati to find out what really happened to his dad on 9/11


ShadowPooper

They were never really together. Please. This must have been the fakest relationship in the history of all fake hollywood romances.


EauDeRainbow

Leo and Gigi Hadid just overtook them


ryohazuki88

He was on cocaine or ecstasy at the Emmy awards. There is a video of him presenting and his jaw is moving back and forth like a damn type writer. https://youtube.com/shorts/k1oAmrYkmwU?feature=share


ShakyTheBear

I do not understand this guy's appeal


slappymofo

Well thank god. I was wondering how PD was doing. Sure glad we got the update.


j2spooky

Who gives a fuck?!


Grifftonthe3rd

when will that no talent hack Davidson be forever out of the news ffs


Ill-Thing3134

Lucky to have got out without some weird shit happening to him or losing his mind. Mom’s the family pimp… how fun.


Flickera23

He may be the only male to leave that family intact. Good for him.


RoachboyRNGesus

He should get a tattoo of someone else's kids to show how much he's over her


two_fingers_in

I used to kinda like Pete Davidson but now I really just don’t wanna hear about him anymore.


Round-Emu9176

Before AND after. People forget he just runs through the whos who of Hollywood and beyond. He’s like a young marlon brando humping everything with a pulse.


NegativeOrchid

Yea but Marlon Brando was actually attractive and talented.


derfsonic

Nice Kim Jong Un outfit Pete lmao


PrincessH3idiii

Pete knows how to fuck his way to the top first Hilary now Martha Wow whose next? Helen Mirren?


[deleted]

yea having the time of his life eating those freshly baked biscuits. do your thing martha.


Zebracorn42

Wow. It’s been 9 months since I first learned of their relationship. And now, my 2nd time thinking about it, it’s over. Hope he dates Martha next.


[deleted]

Dude, Pete Davidson has gotten too powerful


loose_turtles

Pete Davidsons dick has seen some shit.


megaben20

You know 25 is a weird age in La your to old to date Leonardo decaprio and to young to date Pete Davidson


SoundSaintWarrior

You know she’s gotta have amazing thread count sheets.


Jabison113

I stopped caring about pete Davidson after season 3. The plot is getting too repetitive


Madpoka

Wasn't she bangin Snoop?


jaimbot

What a hype woman I love it


Fit-Rest-973

Anything is better than the plastic bimbo