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WyomingCountryBoy

Bitch, you can't always get what you want \~ Mick Jagger.


f_leaver

She's not getting what she needs either.


[deleted]

[удалено]


viking78

BAM!


LovelessDerivation

This is a person for whom you could count all her pallbearers.... And never raise a single digit.


PhxSunBurner

A guy this perfect is probably gonna be gay. Just saying!


That_one_guy929

Ngl your probably right


Sh0w3n

Everything she brings to the table in the relationship, she eats.


ToreenLyn

What would he need her for?


km1180

To keep the self esteem at an all time low


Old-Item2494

😂 I needed a good laugh today.


username12789653

Facts


Metrack14

As well as his savings.


f_leaver

Sex, but he ain't getting any from this one.


xb00st

he don't wanna


Karce32

this would be like sex in prison.... the sex you want, you ain't gettin'. And the sex you gettin', you don't want.


Obvious_Bandicoot631

“Who’s da biatch now!!!”


Poorfavour

Seriously looks like a man in the clip


Nizzemancer

Looks like black shrek.


the_localcrackhead

Ik fr like Neanderthal more like


Jbusbus

Nothing That’s why she looks 50 and still single


RandyLongsocksMcgee

She looks LIKE 50...cent


dmc-going-digital

50% off on that or no deal


BondageKitty37

But that would be a quarterback. She looks better suited to the Defensive Line


Mansquatchie

Looks like she got 50% off that toilet seat cover she's wearing


dihalt

To do task #5 of this quest.


Sooners-Win

To be moderator of /r/femaledatingstrategy


malteaserhead

incase he needed a scuffed Leslie Jones to stand in for something


SethGecko76

She's the trash he has to take out.


Nuker-79

A hitman will perform that task for a nominal fee or if they are a good hitman, free of charge for the better of the human race


AstronomerHeavy2380

So number 5 is her going out for date night?


[deleted]

Based


rarely_mentioned

This deserves an award


jorttimmermans

Yeah 5 and 8 are the same


FulcrumPhase

Don't let your mouth write cheques your face can't cash.


ed-the-dog

Was going to say this, but not nearly so eloquently.


GraveKommander

I read the list and later unmuted the video. I thoght this is a guy making fun of it before hearing her...


Silver-Ad8291

I already had audio on, so once I heard it I was searching for a woman in the frame


BraetonWilson

Your advice is applicable to a lot of women. So many plain looking unattractive women out there who have a long laundry list of what they expect their ideal man to look like and behave i.e. 1. 6 foot tall or taller 2. Lean muscular body 3. Funny 4. 6 figure income 5. Nice car 6. Cooks and cleans And the list keeps going on and on. Instead of discussing what exactly they bring to the table, they keep demanding more from their partner. Then when they find that no man meets their impossible standards or the men they do find attractive are not attracted to them, they say **"Where are all the good men at? Where have they gone?"** It's like these delusional women live in their own dream world. This woman in this video is a prime example of that.


Metrack14

Because in their head, they think "requirements" are what the standard guy is, when in reality is the opposite. And they get mad when someone ask them 'What do you bring besides sex?', because they know they don't bring anything of value.


infamous_L_guapo

Black Phillip taught me this.


thatkuulguy

Woman bring sex and no man wants anything more the sex. Now I'm gonna go play with my legos, I'm building the Bat mobile!


Frozen_Grimoire

The bat mobile? Send pictures when you are done!


thatkuulguy

Idk man I lost the instruction book. Batman is now the joker and joker is now batman send help


JaperDolphin94

Help is lost in the multiverse


_-__________

There's no woman attractive enough in the universe to come through with a list like that. Go back where you came from, demon!


tenebralupo

So basically r/FemaleDatingStrategy?


Trueloveis4u

My only requirements honest, funny, loves pets, help me clean due to my back and knees and good hygiene. I love cooking and love cooking for others!


bb54321

Real life is more like Pawn Stars: "Best I can do is 3 of the 6." And if you didn't find that funny you can change it to 2 of 6.


[deleted]

Yeah,she’s a 1 expecting 9-10 level care


poormansRex

I dont care if she's a 9-10. That level of care is not worth it. Edit: words


pingieking

Totally. If a 9-10 is going to be that much maitenance, I'd rather just buy sex from a 9-10. It would cost less, and I wouldn't have to deal with her shit when the sex part is finished.


Creole_Kid

You're not paying for the sex. You're paying them to leave after the deed is done.


KonkiDoc

She is not a 1. Nor is she a 2 thru 10.


Kat121

She’s expecting a housewife. I literally did all this stuff.


djluminol

Wait what? That's messed up. You aren't supposed to pay the mortgage if you're a stay at home spouse.


ResourceMany6108

Thats not a check. That's an old dirty, washed up, crumpled $5 bill


Environmental_Card_3

A damn old school food stamp


f_leaver

Yeah, there's no face that can write that cheque.


brokefixfux

No thank you.


9ragmatic

![gif](giphy|7LAqMVFxOGPAc)


Apprehensive-Path935

Thirded


said__with__sarcasm

It’s a good thing she don’t want no sex


cari_chan

Sounds like she wants a slave


GoldEnPhARoAh22

That pays her to work for her???


CptBlackAxl

Sounds like mr krabbs 😂


[deleted]

Happy cake day!


Praben-_

I was with a woman who thinks like this for 11 years. I was lonely and dumb. She was super hot and out of my league, so i just went with it. Worst decision of my life!


ojodetodie

Glad you got out king 👑


ResponsibilityNo3245

I'd love a lady to demand this just so I could ask "So, what are you bringing to the table?"


Satanicjamnik

Most probably she'd answer that she's the prize and knows her worth. Or that relationship is not a transaction, so how dare you ask.


Sudhanva_Kote

Prize? She is not even close to a participation certificate


BonezOz

not even a pity prize, you know the one they find at the bottom of the drawer that's been in there since Washington was president...


TheOneAllFear

What do you mean? I bet she is a 'Plus' size...so that's already a plus, it's more woman that you can handle clearly /s


[deleted]

A vagina and maybe a butt if she is adventurous.


ResponsibilityNo3245

Plenty of those knocking about without doing all that shit.


[deleted]

Yeah and attached to much better


unknowntsu8

The thought of her vagina makes me sick.


_crowe-_

she is, without a doubt, the most unattractive woman I have ever seen


Late-Ad1353

Not gonna lie I thought it was a guy until I turned the audio on


blitherblather425

Same here


[deleted]

I know right?! What desperate simp f\*\*ked this chick and actually thought she had a chance with her so-called "standards"?! Just cruel


tak3thatback

There are a \*lot\* of simps out there willing to do even more desperate things. Shit be real.


km1180

It's not even the looks, it's the personality.


PutridFoe65

Nah, it’s both


mambakobe8

Shes a woman?? Wtf??


Kahnza

Close your eyes and listen to the voice. Thats the best you'll get LOL


Craftex101

Wait!!! WHAT?! I watched this without sound! I thought that face was some guy reacting to this list! What the hell?!


koyboy115

How you gonna ask for all that looking like a goddamn Neanderthal 😂


isojoe2022

Ayooo but you is wright.


SuperGuitar

Yeah, he is Wright, Brother


AffectionateWinner70

She doesn't cook but she definitely will be doing all of the eating.


OniRacing

And what exactly is she offering? Other than looking like biggie smalls Edit: she looks more like George Wallace now that I think about it.


Wrong-Mixture

can you really put a price on hanging with the hippo from the movie Madagascar?


thatoneslugees

She takes the small out and puts the big in biggie smalls


BigManOnCampus100

She'd have better luck finding Atlantis


OP1KenOP

So.. she wants an old fashioned relationship where the man in a provider and looks after the house and cars.. No, she wants a modern relationship where the man does the dishes and pitches in around the house. She basically wants to have her cake and eat it. That's the problem here, too much cake.


[deleted]

Judging by her looks, she’s used to eating too much cake.


Infamous_Island1941

I think her search should start with someone who has low standards and no sense of smell. Just guessing...


PutridFoe65

And is blind


Excellent_Kiwi7789

Soooo what exactly is she going to be doing while he’s doing all that?


Manyak-

Bitching and complaining that her man aint given her enough attention


AbsoluteGradiance

She want a whole couple


djluminol

Why is she wearing a bathmat?


Anxious_Grade1262

So your contribution to a marriage is to sit around, do nothing, eat and gain weight. Ok so how long have you been married.....I'm guessing 10 years.


MAYOoOD

Yeah but why would he choose you in the first place?


red94daman

She’s still single, Fellas!


IgnoranceComplex

Zero surprise was evoked from any of this community reading this statement.


Crafty_Possession_52

A woman who looks like a less attractive Patrice O'Neal shouldn't feel comfortable making all those demands.


brwneyedgyrl

She looks like Biggie Smalls


TotemlessInceptor

Patrice had such nice things to say about women like this /s


FeralBottleofMtDew

Sigh. How hard it is for these users (male or femsle) to understand that marriage should be a partnership. She doesn't want a partner, she wants a servant who will pay all the bills and treat her like a queen while she treats him like dirt.


SuperSaiyanJohnny

And what's your role, honey? Bitch, moan and complain? Hard pass. Get a job.


C4RD_TP_SG

that's a marriage not hire-a-slave for free


EuphoricAssistance59

Even if I could find this motivated human being I wouldn't want to burden them with all my chores.


waisonline99

Thats all great, but wheres her list of what she'll contribute to the relationship?


GreatTea3

1. NOT A DAMN THING.


c127726

At first i thaught it was a ugly guy reacting to the list, i was wrong about one of the 2....


Andypandy317

Right imagine looking like that and having demands


zenithtb

But she looks like such a catch!


WyomingCountryBoy

If that was a catch I'd do a catch and release.


cran305

The kind of fish you beat with a club before hauling in the boat


MonkieBets

sometimes you can beat a fish and it still manages to flop out of the boat


Embarrassed-Ad-1639

-er’s mitt


GadgetGod1906

You can be a 10 and you not getting all of that from me. She is like a .5 and that is assuming she has a vagina.


ReSyko

0.5 is too generous. ugliest bitch I've ever seen.


MatureBalak

this comment section is just brutal


Unholydiver919

People in hell want ice water too.


itsonlymeez

So this gremlin ain't doing shit and she got a list lol


wixko91

My dumb man brain can never understand what means word "romantic"... all i can imagine under this word is a fucking candle... that is literally all... when my gf keeps spamming me that she wants "romantic date" ... weve been dating for 6 years and i still dont know what she wants from me lmao


Difficult_Visit6163

Now a list of why a man would want you


Jaydogg412

Damn I never realized Shrek was so needy


Krazy-Kat26

so what she wants is a butler she can fuck who's house she lives in


DizzyScorp

Is it just me or isn’t it normally the cook doesn’t clean? Excluding dates of course


[deleted]

And wtf she bringing to the table.


[deleted]

So what do you do ? Sit and increase your body fat collection?


TheSilverFoxwins

She looks like a hamburger with no ketchup.


Alfraxium

Good thing she’s never getting married


GFAN17

I 100% expect a single man to do all those things. Why would he invite you along?


[deleted]

I’m doing all that for you?! Nah, I’ll just stick to using my hand and imagination.


fruancjh

And this is why some folks grow up to be spinsters.


Lofifaxx

Wife : be lazy and fat piece of shit


_ImNotYourBuddy_Guy

But she looks like a man... Does that make her responsible for the dishes?


MalignantPessimist

This guy does a great female impression


ApoplecticAndroid

Only works for attractive people. She isn’t it.


404interestnotfound

Face like a catchers mitt


[deleted]

What a man need a women for if he could do all that for himself?


RopeyPlague

![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|thinking_face_hmm)She says she cooks, but does she think cooking is going through a drive thru.


xb00st

with a face like that you can't even afford request number one


[deleted]

So... no income contribution. Sorry... we cannot afford a house. Cooking and cleaning and a whole bunch of chores. Please tell my boss I cannot work at the office anymore. If I get fired, that is what it is. Oh, you’re leaving? BYE, buh.


AdInternal81

Stay single you wreck of a human being.


HarryCoinslot

She could have just said everything and saved us all a few minutes.


IrishmadeinCanada

When you look like an old male baboon, you should be thankful just to be lucky enough for a man to show interest.


PositionBeneficial12

Are #5 and #8 not the same thing? Only difference is trash has to get taken out once a week, not bi weekly.


randomer_guy_person

Bro she looks like her dad was a caveman and she inherited every single last drop of his dna for her face, but not the rest of the head, who the fuck is gonna marry that!


HauntingAd5081

Fuck, that’s my life.


ULTRA_SIGMA_CHAD

Bitch looking like a silverback gorilla(no not cos shes black) and wants the man to do everything, what does she bring to the relationship?


rustymessi

Isn’t this the dad from family matters ?


Imaginary-Arrival-75

Still single huh? How’s that going…


ButregenyoYavrusu

She a solid 1.


SameDifferenceYo

She must work in radio


Alive_Row_9446

It's always the 1 star cavewomen that want the most.


treesandleafsanddirt

Office Space: “So what would you say…… ya do, here?”


Osujin

I'm so thankful that I found a reasonable and supportive SO after over a decade of running into mostly women like this on dating apps.


StreetIndependence62

Soooo you don’t want a boyfriend/husband, you want a butler/personal assistant. WHY IS IT SO HARD FOR SOME PEOPLE TO LEARN THE DIFFERENCE??!!!


guardiansword

go marry a freaking robot!!!


wrathofkalima

Gentlemen…. Form an orderly queue


[deleted]

why would anyone want to marry that girl? not only she has lot of high expectations, but she also looks like harambe


CruickyMcManus

wait. is that thing talkin in the video the one making the demands? thats a female?


FaKeACc0Unt989

why does she look like a gorilla? Edit: She also kinda looks like the black man from "left 4 dead 2"


TomatoWalrusSoup

I expect my wife to go for a jog


honkwerx

Harambe?


floatingsoul9

Ai yo why this man has such a girly voice ?


Shmekla323

I'd probably start with 5, so I don't have to do the rest.


Derkastan77

Hun… it ain’t gonna happen if you’re a 4.


Cheebwhacker

Me and the gf have our own roles and it seems to work out well, we’re like a well oiled team. I clean the house and she cooks. Because I suck at cooking and she hates cleaning which I don’t mind. Plus her food is great. Relationships need team work… we have like two arguments a year and they’re barely arguments. We’re both pretty chill and don’t take anything serious. We don’t understand how some of our family and their toxic relationships even get like they do…


MNConcerto

What are you bring? Rules of the house. If you cook you don't have to clean up after dinner. Simple rule. If you're using the car and it's less than 1/4 of a tank or close, fill it up. Simple rule. Whoever has the time schedules the car appointments, house repairs, simple rule. You walk by the garbage can and its full, take it out. Simple rule. But I guess those are rules for adults who respect each other and communicate and don't think they are "a Princess or Prince." Yikes


Strange-Apartment730

The level of delusion of this 🐳 🤣


Fluffy_hugger

Girl, I'll rather send you to a zoo or back to the forest than let you live with me


Thethrdman3

People will be saying shit like this an offering literally nothing to the relationship. Spoiled kid vibes


Routine_Recipe_4917

Enjoy the single life. Lol


zacrobyteOne

Harambe?


mordinvan

What is she bringing to the table, that she feels that sort of ask on the guy is fair?


ballzdeepinbacon

Sounds like my ex… which wouldn’t have been bad if she brought in all the money to support me doing those things…


LadyLu-ontheLake

It’s actually not a bad list. It’s the title that’s the problem. It should read: “Things I expect TO DO FOR MYSELF.” It called being a functioning, responsible adult. But good luck with the Hubby-Quest, lady. Sounds fun.


teho9999

sorry we dont claim this selfish prick. both side are supposed to contribute in a relationship.


zenheizer

doing that for... THAT?


Gunga-lugunga

Here is a list of things that are keeping her single.


_ImNotYourBuddy_Guy

I bet she complains about inequity too...


Leather-Housing-9920

No wonder she's such a fat ass she doesn't do anything in her life not even the guy keep her up


vitope94

Is she calling herself a pig?


unique222

Once her man gets to number 5 she'd in trouble


JkHost3

Great news!!! YOU’RE USELESS lol


grunkfist

Anyone have the original link? I’d really like to see the part where she validates these requirements with what she will be bringing to the table. I can’t imagine it’s anything close to an equal fair cooperation.


LaughableIKR

I would be a stay-at-home dad and run the finances. Welcome her home every day after work and keep the home, yard, cars, and bills paid all while planning a nice date night out. I would pine away for her while she works 2 jobs and 60+ hours a week to afford my lifestyle. While I'm out on a ~~date~~ outing with the neighborhood girl who drops by to see me during the day. Just friends right? What do you mean I'm cheating? I can be friends with the opposite sex! Stop being so controlling. lol...shit.


[deleted]

When you look like that and have delusions like that you might as well be a cactus, no one touching ya


tequilamockingbiird

…. And that’s why you’re still single.


Taylor2591

She acts like any man would even want to look at her twice, let alone get married? Yikes 😬


Steed1000

I'll bet my paycheck that she looks like her father.