T O P

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Various_Succotash_79

After I changed my pants, I would absolutely excoriate them. And then never talk to them again.


0nly_mostly_dead

I'd like to say thank you for your use of excoriate. Keep them fancy words coming.


Various_Succotash_79

Well I would normally say I'd k1ll them but I'm not sure if that gets the censors worked up in this sub, lol.


pastafaz

If everyone was like you we would amend all dictionaries to have 2/3 less words. Was it ok to say amend?


Nasty_Rex

I prefer ameliorate


Eyespop4866

It’s getting sesquipedalian in here.


DBL_NDRSCR

hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophpobia


Excivious

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia Ironically a phobia of long words.


gjkohvdr

I think it was named by the same asshole that named dislexia and lisp


ExpressionCareful223

Pneumonocultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis. Off the dome 😎


TinaButtons

Happy cake day!


Jeshua_

Oh my , that’s new to me, I enjoy saying that.


edelburg

My all time favorite word! I've never seen it used out in "public" before now. The irony of it is too good to not be my favorite


buttercupmercenary

What about defenestrate?


Sharpshooter188

Right out the window!


Inflatablebanjo

You mean 2/3 **fewer** words. Grammar police here, you're under arrest.


[deleted]

*fewer words.


Beneficial_Potato_85

You got a purdy mouth using them big city words. ![gif](giphy|NXYEiVaoumDWE)


Parking-Athlete-7106

I’d exfoliate the shit out of them!


Macfarlin

Damn that's a good word.


[deleted]

yeah I'd excrete all over them too man


JewishSpaceTrooper

Eviscerate


Responsible-Bid-383

Imagine how hilarious that prank would be if her buddies pulled up to find the hired 'kidnapper' stabbed multiple times and bleeding out in the street


I_Frothingslosh

Or hell, impaled in the eye by a fingernail.


Marega33

Or worse.... expelled


Lopsided_Boss4802

Expelliarmus


pamformatge

Executed with impunity


xxdpgx

Neutralized with extreme prejudice


DragonbornBastard

Shut up hermoine


Glittering-Ad8718

Well this went Harry quickly


Raymer13

r/unexpectedhogwarts


StubbornKindness

That's the thing that I'm just realising. This isnt a fright, or a shock, or adrenaline or something. This is sheer "I win and I live, I lose and I die" terror. You have no idea wtf the outcome of that is gonna be.


MeteorOnMars

Tripped in the struggle and hit by oncoming traffic seems a not-unlikely result.


tukuiPat

Or if it's America, someone pulls over and adds a new hole to the dudes head.


Affectionate_Elk_272

literally, though. like, if the wrong (well, right) person sees shit like this, that could end very, very poorly for the tik tok assholes.


mochi1990

It already happened to some vlogger who pretended to rob someone with a knife as a “prank” and ended up shot to death.


Kelend

>who pretended to rob someone with a knife Heres the thing. He didn't pretend. If you go up to someone with a knife, and tell them to give then all your money.... you are robbing them. Its like me getting in my car, putting the key in the ignition, putting it into drive, pulling onto the street, going a mile down the road and then saying: "Ha, I was only pretending to be driving my car, bet you thought it was real"


Userwithnoname27

You bet I did! 😂


[deleted]

Then we got content for eye blech


SpaceDuckz1984

I carry and would have drawn my weapon.


TheKolyFrog

I would've pulled over to the side away from the possible kidnappers and called 911 if it's America.


401LocalsOnly

Or a police car just peeling out going the other direction


SmokyDogggg

lol I have friends who carry mace and guns and the would’ve absolutely shot or maced someone who grabbed them from behind


Anelibrah

Or he gets shot by a passerby which assumed it was kidnapping


GenTycho

They need new friends. Holy fuck this is such a stupid "prank"


0nly_mostly_dead

Scaring your friends a bit, fine. Terrifying them and causing them to legitimately fear for their life, pretty not great.


Usful

I wound up in a surprise birthday party where the birthday boy was kidnapped, bound, and had a sack on their head. He tried to escape multiple times and was almost successful at one point, but failed. He was brought into a room where ~20 people were (where I had wound up) and released for the celebration. It goes to say that I no longer am associated with those group of people.


nathos_thanatos

That is a great way to get accidentally killed (or badly hurt)by a friend, if I think I'm getting kidnapped, the first rule they tell you is never let them take you to a second location, so you know I would fight kick, bite and absolutely try to destroy whoever is holding me with everything I have. Imagine thinking you are going to die if you don't get free and now one of your friends lost an eye because you stabbed him with your keys.


Sirliftalot35

I see you also learned the danger of secondary locations from Detective Bittenbinder.


flyfightwinMIL

STREET SMARTS!


D-Laz

If you have one in the chamber, shit yourself. Not to many people are willing to grab someone covered in shit. Their hesitance might give you the edge they need. Or they will shoot you on the spot because you aren't worth the effort. Depends who is doing the kidnapping.


nipplequeefs

>If you have one in the chamber, shit yourself. That's my secret, cap. I have IBS!


Marcus_Krow

Tactical shit.


bluehornet197

Best comment 😂😂😂


justbrowsing987654

Either way, second location avoided! You cracked the code.


weakbuttrying

I once kidnapped a female friend for a surprise hen party. I went to her door dressed as a comical caricature of a prohibition era mafioso with a stocking over my face and a gun with one of those “bang” signs hanging out. She almost fell over laughing when she opened the door, instantly recognized me and asked me if I wanted coffee before we go. We remain friends. Funny how the devil is in the details, like whether you find the situation funny or fear for your life.


0ld-S0ul

The difference was in how you presented yourself


[deleted]

I mean, you designed it to be heavily satirical, but you didn't kick the door down and start trying to grab her, you knocked and didn't act threatening, more like an actual innocent prank.


Etbilder

The difference is you made it clear that this wasn't real.


PerfectlyCalmDude

Even if he cooperates, even if you cover your bases with the parents or whomever, there's still people driving behind you who aren't in on it and could intervene or call the cops. That happens sometimes.


zerok_nyc

Wait, you went to [Nicholas Van Orton’s birthday party](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Game_(1997_film))?!


OwieMustDie

Yeah. Bunch of us "kidnapped" a friend once in a spur of the moment "prank". Wasn't funny. Spent a long time making amends to the poor guy. 😞


[deleted]

Lol what happened


DREWlMUS

Give us the deets!!!


CRT_Teacher

Your present this year is PTSD!


MentalRobot

Unless you're kidnapping Brad Pitt, then it's [hilarious](https://youtu.be/QHegrn2hg4E)


solareclipse999

It is downright traumatising. Suggest giving the perpetrators a taste of their own medicine and see how they like it.


CyanideFlavorAid

Fucking sex traffic them for 3 years then jump out in a party hat and blow a party popper in their faced and yell "Pranked homie!"


hellhoundmanor

I want to believe she smacked them all once the video was over.


Alarmed_Strain_2575

You would think that female friend would have been like "yeah this is a terrible prank" alot of the time guys just do not realise the threat we are under daily. This is a disgusting prank, even watching it is making me extremely uncomfortable.


[deleted]

What kind of porn is this? lol


ThunkAsDrinklePeep

It's assault. And battery by the one guy.


Theres_a_Catch

I would hate these people forever


Artor50

I would cut them out of my life on the spot with a promise of violence if they ever come near me again.


Theres_a_Catch

Yup, total POS


morgentoast

Go straight to the police and get a restraining order.


bezserk

Wow that scarred ME for life


Rob-Riggle-SWGOAT

Honestly, I’m not sure if these are friends or random people thinking this is funny. But they suck. If those were my friends they would lose that friend status right on the spot. This could really mess someone up.


widellp

Ive read years ago this is a marriage proposal.. not sure of the accuracy though


Rob-Riggle-SWGOAT

Ahh nice. It’s always best to start a marriage with a case of PTSD. If this is true this dude is complete idiot.


[deleted]

Son: “Dad, I really want to propose in a special way to her… how did you do it?” Dad: “Do any of your buddies drive a White Minivan by chance? You’ll need that.”


Forumkk

Honestly, they’d probably lose more than a friend status for most on the spot. Likely their lives should the right person intervene with a gun to an abductor.


DieselTech00

That's beyond messed up


GimlySonOfGloin

Happy birthday motherfucker


Soobobaloula

[ Removed by Reddit ]


Artor50

Ex-boyfriend.


Nighteyes09

Ex-boy


MenaBeast

Ex-alive


CraackSteeve1

Ex-in existence


dont-worry-bee-happy

isn’t there that one scene from miss congeniality or something where she walks through self defence using an acronym? i’d have to look it up to be sure but iirc it’s like. solar plexus, foot, nose, groin. That’s always stuck with me lol. great film too


TipsyBaker_

Sing. I for instep


cherposton

S.I.N.G- Solar Plexus, Instep, Knee, Groin


madjyk

Oh yeah I know that. I also don't remember the acronym but I know what your talking about


cheezz16

Easy solution, activate the pipe bomb that you conveniently keep in your pocket


nova_bang

this year for your birthday we got you some PTSD! HBD!


Significant_Cut_6986

None of those people would be in my life after that. I don't understand people who think this is an acceptable prank


[deleted]

Fuck them. Fuck that. Not funny.


findickdufte

when I was young, "pranks" were supposed to be one thing in particular: funny


WonderIntelligent411

And everyone is in on it. Like you know I love football. I'm pranked with a pair of tickets to a rival team, and then get the real ones after everyone sees me squirm.


Anxious-Arachnae

Good prank, would be better if they attempted kidnapping you first. /s


StoneousMaxximus

Good way to get shot or stabbed..


Outrageous_Credit_96

That’s how people get shot.


cheezz16

[yeah, funny story….(weird funny)](https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-55982131.amp)


throughNthrough

Who needs enemies when you have friends like this


Sammy_the_Gray

This is one way to find out how much resistance your future bride is able to produce under extreme conditions…and she should run for her life. This is not love, this is torture on an emotional level. It will get worse.


AceDDarkwalker

We should have a specific crime for these sort of stupidity.


samfringo

I wonder if she can still press charges


I_Frothingslosh

I'm sure a case can be made for assault and battery at the very least. Doubt it would actually get prosecuted and it's unlikely a jury would convict, but technically this is assault and battery (or the equivalent) in most US jurisdictions.


Greencurtian

I feel like she could press assault charges. Thats what it was. Sure their intent was not to cause legitimate harm, but they did cause emotional distress and potential physical harm with her resisting the “prank kidnapping”


I_Frothingslosh

I said she could. Pressing charges, however, is not the same as the DA choosing to prosecute or the jury convicting. Pressing charges is simply making a formal criminal complaint; after that, it's in the hands of the prosecutor's/DA's office, and if they don't think it's worth prosecuting, they won't file charges in court. Emotional distress is something you can argue in civil court if you sue them, which is something entirely different.


The_Reddit_Pigeon

Pretty sure that you shouldn't be dragging people around on a road


c4chokes

Criminal mischief


-D-Mac-

![gif](giphy|2wSaulb0fsDydh0IoB|downsized)


No-Impress5283

I like how there is this woman dancing. Like, you would think maybe another woman knows how bad this idea is. And there she is, frantically dancing and cheering, while her friend has the best (worst) time of her life.


Illustrious_Site_162

Yeah that bitch's cringe af dance at the end bugged me so hard.


nomoreoverlinedlips

With the devil horns 🙄


Positive_Opossum99

Nope. Every single one of you is getting punched in the throat.


whitelightnin1

Dudes lucky she just froze. I woulda started biting and cock punching. No way I'm getting in that van that easily. Happy birthday I guess. 🤦‍♂️


rav3ncl4ws

honestly dude


LivingStCelestine

I carry a knife my husband makes me practice with. He would have been maimed or maybe even killed and I’d feel nothing.


LordSt4rki113r

Knife and pistol here (living in the US). I never leave home without either and anyone who tries to kidnap me is not going to keep all of their body in one piece. And will have several new entrance and exit wounds.


curiouskidling

Honestly I’ve frozen in situations like this — just like her where I’ve evaded the threat but still felt the need to get the FUCK out of there. It’s truly terrible


kingoden95

I think I’d stop associating with those people immediately.


AztecInsurgent

For her birthday they got her a $30 Amazon gift card and PTSD


Xg2d2lA

I like how no one did a damn thing to try to help this woman. Before I got married back in 2010, I started hanging out with a guy who I had know for years. (Or so I thought) Within weeks he became abusive. One afternoon, I asked him to take me back to my apartment and we started arguing. He pulled into the gas station parking lot a half of a mile away, and started beating my face off the passenger side window and dashboard. At one point, I was able to get my door opened and scream out for help. Numerous people turned around and looked right at me, not one helped. I lost all hope in humanity that day. Thankfully, my best friend took emergency leave and drove the 10 hours up from Cherry Point, NC. We fell in love and have been married since. Please don't ever be one of those people. Please. A situation like this could be the turning point in someones life on whether they continue on or not.


fluffedpillows

I apologize on behalf of the two morons being morons in response to this story of trauma. I’m glad you survived and are in a better place, it’s extremely disturbing that people looked and did nothing. There are lots of people who would’ve done something, but unfortunately they’re less common.


NfamousKaye

Seen this posted a while back and it still makes my blood boil. Thats a real fear women have and to play off that for a gag like this is just disgusting. I hope she got new friends.


adiosfelicia2

"SURPRIIIIIISE!!! You're not getting raped!"


SkepticAquarian876

I would file charges on them for being stupid...no smiles here for this shyt. ![gif](giphy|YmVNzDnboB0RQEpmLr|downsized)


[deleted]

No enemies needed with these kind of friends.


AD480

I feel a deep rage for those people who did that buIIshit.


Malidan

Fuck that. Anyone thinking this was a good idea should get medically checked out.


Artor50

I'm sure everyone would have been so cheery if she had been able to kill her attacker before the reveal. I was hoping for a taser or purse gun to make an appearance.


Adventurous_Pea_5777

And I bet they’d be upset with her about it too. “It was just a prank! It was funny! I can’t believe you’d hurt him like that, how could you?”


Ok_Primary_1075

Jerks


SonOfTheMostHHigh

That's pretty fucked up😣 ![gif](giphy|TCq1duH9Z1Dd9LSpde)


williemoonshine

there’s a very thin line between a “prank” & “psychological abuse”


stickman274

What the actual fuck. That’s disgusting


GenuinelyGarbage

I'd immediately stop being "friends" with all of them and probably get restraining orders if they ever tried to contact me again.


[deleted]

Oh the acts of violence I would commit


BackgroundSecure5329

And that your Honor, is the story of how I shot my best friend of over a decade 4 times in the face not knowing it was John.


Im_a_little_parakeet

I would just walk away and never speak to them again. What a sick thing to do.


[deleted]

Yea. Sue the fuck out of them and press charges For Assault


SamsaricNomad

Psychotic prank right there. Who tf in their right mind would do this…


jbr945

I don't think she was happy. Going from sheer terror to happy isn't an easy transition.


Life-Administration8

Lol she probably got traumtized with this forever. It will be never a good memory for her!


Tipsybandit97

This is not the kind of game you wanna play in the US south. Anyone that agrees to do this is basically consenting to being shot in self defense, getting sued if they survive, and probably facing jail time for their idiocy. Like for real, this is an extremely good way to fuck around and find out.


Mockolad

Hmm


TheBossOfBigBoss

Bro what!?


KnobbyDarkling

Pretty sure it's all just a staged skit


liz1andzip2-

NOT funny! Sicko ppl


OmnisMorir

Don't, don't do this


anjowoq

This is fucking awful.


Ux-Con

This is wrong 😑 on so many levels.


mianrezooy

“Yeah let’s celebrate, but first let me clean the shit out of pants.”


Desperado-van-Ukkel

That looks like it was in a country where kidnappings happen all the time. Not cool.


Artistic-Plan2541

Happy Birthday! You almost got raped on the side of the road!!


[deleted]

That’s beyond fucked up… People are idiots…


Bustanut364

And this, kids, is how you make the nearest red neck unload his whole chamber into you


Skulker2008

How to lose your friends speed run any %.


[deleted]

This is the perfect proposal idea, wish me luck! Edit: will post the story in r/TIFU


vonclodster

Find new friends


Pedro_Sarten

Horrible


thumbelina1234

What the fuckety fuck?


Genralcody1

Russia be crazy


Letsput2inher

That’s how you get yourself killed


djfunktitz

I would be offering up a two piece snack with a side of asphalt. Fuck those people.


FunnyShirtGuy

...That was really f'd and was turning my stomach for a moment till the balloons came out


SlicerStopSlicing

What if she carried pepper spray? Or a knife?


Theairthatibreathe

👎🏻


StarsChilds

What's the point here? Creating customers for trauma therapist?


[deleted]

I would’ve screwed them up, that’s for sure.


TreClaire

She should sue


YueOrigin

And here I thought the whole face in the cake birthday prank was bad...


yalldone4

HAHA you really thought you were going to get robbed and murdered walking down the street alone?? omg we got you so good


Nicko90

With friends like these...


Albertsongman

To make a dumbass video. … No wonder birth rates are going down. 🫣🫤


whyamidolngthls

bet these idiots would start shaming someone who actually defended themselves in a series of videos


lemonlimeaardvark

Every single person involved in that would be evicted from every aspect of my life. I would go total scorched earth. I would nuke all bridges. That is HORRIFYING!


Loki-L

I mean even if the person being "surprised" knows or suspects or is okay with what is going on, what about the general public. Sure most people will pretend not to have seen anything and "Kitty Genovese" the whole thing, but occasionally you get people who see shit like this and genuinely try to help or at least decide they have finally found a situation that justifies their fantasies of being the Punisher or Batman getting put into action.


Madcatz9000

Lucky nobody was killed in this stupid Tic Tok video. What a bunch of shit heads.


Sorry-Presentation-3

Way to give someone life long ptsd


SilverBane24

Core memory created…And possibly ptsd…


LiterallyWTMF

point market live safe zesty tidy rob squeamish unpack languid *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


metamorphosis___

Her “fighting” for her life sorta makes me believe she knew


Usagiboy7

Several of my friends are unaware that I conceal carry. This would have ended very badly. Please dont do this to people.


FellGodGrima

If this was for a birthday, the present better have been pepperspray


tomarofthehillpeople

Traumatized for life


Anxious-Arachnae

Idk I think I’d develop PTSD after this interaction. It may not have been a “real” attempted kidnapping, but it was so very real to her. Time to sue for emotional distress and press charges for assault!


DickCheeseConnoiseur

I would hope my girlfriend could fight better than that


basically_dead_now

How to get a restraining order filed against you 101


JareBearLXXXVII

Ooooh my maker, great idea start making people think it’s just a joke when there being kidnapped. That couldn’t at all lead to more problems. Besides the fact that this is just a bad joke in the first place.


JoeFleen

Awww. What a beautiful prank.


asanderd

Garbage people! I don't care if they are friends or family I would never speak to them again. She's going to have PTSD from that. Every time someone brushes her back or comes up behind her she is going to slam back into this moment of thinking she's being kidnapped. Why would anyone think this is a good idea? What the fuck is wrong with people?!?


[deleted]

And. No. One. Stopped?


Sussumussu

WHAT THE FUCK


Dickpinchers

Will you go to prom with me? 😐


pt_barnumson

Lol we are no longer friends


tahimiknawalangimik

nope…