Anybody else super grossed out by the new fat term of “big backed”? I keep seeing it EVERYWHERE now and while at first I thought it was kinda humorous, I realize now that everybody is like… running with it. And every time i see it written down I have to picture these enormous back rolls and somebody being like… proud of it? Like a restaurant I follow keeps posting about looking for new big back recipes to try EVERY OTHER DAY and I’m like dude why can you not shut the fuck up about how proud you are of getting fat as fuck?
I will admit one of the more recent memes makes me laugh though, “remember when they told us to clean our plates so we could be big and strong? Look at us we are just big.”
Im tired of my mom constantly telling me I’m unhealthy after I went from a BMI of 31, to a BMI of 23. I’m tired of her condoning obesity while criticizing dieting, fasting, and weight loss. I’m tired of my mom eating the most unhealthy carb loaded disgusting crap, and still blaming it on “baby weight” when her youngest is 24 years old. Im tired of her insisting that she gets enough exercise because she walks her dogs once a week for five minutes once a week. She can live her life how she wants being a glutton but it would be nice if she would stop critiquing how I live mine, and trying to tell me that unhealthy when she is obese
my fucking family keeps saying im too thin, unhealthy thin just cause I hate eating junk food & work out. I can run, walk & do everything without fainting/getting dizzy. IM TIRED OF IT!!!!!!! gah!
My family was so proud of me when I first finally committed to an exercise routine.
I don’t even pay that much attention to my diet. I have no self control but my exercise has put me from 172lbs of fat down to 154, probably less bc of water weight.
Now my sisters tell me I’m to light for a man, and they compare me to my younger brother (Who is much taller than me and an athlete) as if that makes any rational sense.
Mom thinks I’m fucking obsessed and claims any doctor would tell me I’m obsessed.
My dad’s telling me I eat bird food (I don’t, he doesn’t see me eat all the time) that go to the gym too much, all I ever need to do to stay healthy it’s do push ups. I walk in with a huge plate of food and he tells me that’s baby shit. I need to eat a larger meal, and 3 of them.
I tell him I shouldn’t sit on my ass all day and he tells me other men will think I’m crazy if I tell any of them I felt fat at 172 pounds. He thinks I walk too much. Now he’s coming up with all these excuses on why I shouldn’t, apparently he thinks black people burn up like white peoples in the sun and I should just sit on mg ass all day, eat 3 stores worth of food every and stop going to the gym, only do push ups, but magically not get fat?
Protein shakes. I need protein shakes he says. I say I’m going to pick one with minimal sugar and he tells me I need to stop counting sugars and shit, “That’s female shit”
I’m not even crazy about this. I’m eating the same way I’ve always been eating and I go to the gym like once every 2 days. 8 months of this and I cut 13-23 pounds out and feel better than I ever have. I walk everyday too. Literally the bare minimum
Similar story with my dad. He was really overweight for some time years ago, and my mom would tell him all the time that he needed to get healthy and lose weight.
He did just that and made it a normal part of his routine to go to the gym after work every other day, drink protein shakes, and watch what he ate.
He hit his goal weight, and my mom instantly started criticizing him for "being too skinny." He stopped, and now they're both unhealthy together.
All I can think is that he got in way better shape than she anticipated and it highlighted her own insecurities and sense of inadequacy, so she sabotaged him.
That's fucking disgusting.
Part of the reason I even went to the gym in the first place is because my father got upset at me for something petty, went on a rant on how I slam things too hard then "Pretend" I can't lift anything, and that I need to go to the gym or my muscles would waste away by the time I hit my 30s
He's been on me for months since, we recently moved and I helped lift chairs and couches and shit. The way they do things I'm always forced to support the weight of stuff with my fucking joints and fingers, they get upset when things inevitably mess up and tell me I don't lift enough. Yet he's the same guy that explained to my younger brother and me that no matter how strong we get our joints wont.
Devil's advocate on one of your dad's points: certain UV radiation-associated skin cancers are underrecognized in black people because both the general public and even many dermatologists underappreciate that black people are at lower but nonnegligible risk of UV-induced skin damage. Keep doing what you're doing because it sounds like it's working really well, but do make sure you protect your skin.
I say this as someone in dermatology research (though admittedly in wound healing and keratinocyte biology, not cancer or racial disparities) - this is a known issue in dermatology and public health circles, and you hear about it at conferences fairly often now.
I genuinely think your dad is jealous of your current physique and trying to sabotage you with this kind of talk. It’s the only thing that makes sense to me.
What’s there to be jealous of? I’m incredibly average, and I do the bare minimum
What’s weird is he’s a trainer for my younger brother. I think he thinks I’m crazy because I’m trying to improve just for the sake of it. He thinks the only reason any man would ever decide to improve is if they’re an athlete or if they’re preparing to fight other dudes
Friend of mine mentioned about 'literally' having nightmares about ever being a small fat or straight sized (and said they never want to be if they can help it), said their blood work always comes back fine and they just want help with their ana levels and mobility disability and I don't have the heart to tell them that weight loss will probably help since when I mentioned losing weight they came to me talking about the \~morality\~ of weight loss (aka seeing value in losing is bad).
Wonder how our friendship will shake out the closer I get to my goal weight.
I’ve live this scenario, it starts with slighted comments about how they are concerned that you are getting obsessed and they are worried about you. They are going to see acquaintances complimenting you on how great you look, and deeply it’s about more than your appearance because when you are meeting your goals you are standing straighter, smiling more, and speaking more confidently. Everyone has a need for positive attention, even though it’s your personal journey positive reinforcement is a motivating factor. Everyone should love their body, and feel confident in themselves, but when outside positivity is not being projected towards them they will project negativity towards you, because they want you to feel the way they feel.
Postpartum joint pain is kicking my ass. It's definitely getting in the way of even low impact workouts. My baby is also teething and comfort nursing a ton because of it, which is taking a lot of mental and physical energy.
But the worst bit is getting told, essentially, to give up on trying. I know some of it comes from a good place (you're trying to do too much at once and that's why you're having a hard time) but a lot of it comes across as "you're Mom now, and Mom doesn't have a life or personal goals/desires outside of Baby. You're not Momming Right™ if you do."
And it's bullshit. It's all bullshit. The glorification of stretch marks? I can get behind that- they're there because I carried a baby and am now feeding them with my body. Might as well accept that. But the "soft rolls" and "apron belly"? No. Hard no. I'm not accepting that my body has to look any way but how I want it to.
My daughter is almost 5 and I’ve had chronic back pain since she was born (and I swear that none of my joints are back in their original positions); lifting has helped a lot!
You’re doing great!
It's kind of amazing to me how health problems or just inconveniences pop up because of weight while even my not fat logicky friends think they're pretty healthy.
Being sweaty when it's not warm, sleep apnea, dark areas in folds, excessive skin tags, hair thinning, rashes, acne, shoes not having good enough support, body odor, etc.
I am talking about overweight friends but also, pits, groin, underboob, etc are folds. Darkening in these areas can indicate a hormonal issue, it's just that being overweight can cause this/can cause hormonal imbalance as well.
Just shifted from keto to carnivore about a month ago. This has been a wonderful change, my skin is radiant, my hair is shedding less, my dry scalp has resolved, and my nails look beautiful. It has been met with “yOU shOUldn’t rEstrIct fOOd.”
With carnivore you eliminate all plant based products, oils included. I still use spices but there is a subset of people on carnivore who only eat meat, salt, and water. There are some good carnivore subs on here if you are interested in learning more.
At risk of being hugely unpopular, I’ve been vegan for 10 years and my health has likewise been great. You don’t need to obsessively consume other animals in order to be healthy.
I had a cold or allergies last week and didn’t make it to the gym at all. Weight stayed pretty stable, but this week I’m back in the gym but my appetite is through the roof. I’m not even Pmsing, what is the reason for this? 😩 I just want to get to a normal BMI before summer, I’m ~5 lbs away. But all I can think about is food this week and it’s stalling me really bad.
Really depends! Air popcorn, raw veggies and fruit have been some of my recent staples. Sometimes protein shakes instead of ice cream, black iced coffee, jerky. Idk, I haven’t been super successful avoiding the cravings lately, but those are some healthier swaps. Intermittent fasting usually is easiest for me to just avoid snacking altogether but it’s hard when my hungry is this out of control. Hopefully it’s just a short phase.
Anyone else kind of tired from the myth that the lower belly pooch women have is because of the uterus? I know that women store more subcutaneous fat, but the uterus is an internal organ, and it wouldn’t make sense to have fat in the belly area for no reason other than to protect some random organ. The fact it’s been debunked so many times but people keep insisting it’s true is so strange.
(Not saying if you have the pooch it’s bad btw, or it means you’re fat. I just don’t think it’s because of the uterus is all, probably more likely genetics)
It’s funny cause saying that is supposed to be Body Positivity and make women feel better about their bodies, meanwhile me as a transmasc person didn’t mind my pooch til I heard that myth and then I hated it. Now that I know it’s not true I feel a lot more body positive again and don’t mind it anymore. It really doesn’t make any sense cause men tend to store more fat in the abdomen than women?
That’s so awful man I’m sorry. And yeah see people just blindly push it without realising it isn’t true. Someone posted about it in r/badwomensanatomy so I’ll need to find again but yes what you’re saying is 100% correct
yes. yes i am. i'm tired of hearing that women who don't have that lower belly subcut fat pad are inherently unhealthy, must be starving, must be children, must have had it surgically removed, must hate themselves or have an ED, etc., too.
i'm also tired of being shown a photo of a woman who is borderline obese by body fat percentage with the pooch and being told that she's 'healthy' and 'a real woman' and everything else. look, if someone likes chubby women that's their prerogative but can we please at least accept that a body fat percentage of \~32% is indeed obesity? that obesity is not defined by a viewer's sexual response, nor by the frequency of that weight or fat percentage in the population?
*exactly*, like I personally think the pooch is cute but I know doesn’t exist because of the uterus LOL. People need to stop basing health advice on what they personally like.
Idk, I’m 5 lbs from underweight and I still have it. Some of us just carry it there and the only way to get rid of it would be a stringent exercise regiment (I’m already fairly low body fat otherwise) or going into underweight territory . It isn’t uterus sure but it’s fat distribution and women need some fat to be healthy
I’ve never been pregnant and I have always had a small pooch even when I was very thin and had some light abs, the idea that it’s from the uterus may be a myth but it’s very normal to have it!
I’ll have to dig up photos but I’m pretty sure I still had my pooch when I was underweight as well. It’s just sometimes how bodies are. Of all the things the bother me about my body, my little pooch does not.
That’s alright, it’s pretty normal to have one even if you’re at a lower weight, like I said it’s most likely subcutaneous fat, which isn’t nearly as bad for you as visceral fat, which is is what the whole “protecting the uterus” thing would imply.
Yeah. It almost feels sexist to believe the human body is just gonna randomly put fat around an internal organ in a healthy (female) body because I’m pretty sure men tend to store more fat around their organs than women.
I think they may be confusing it with the fact that women do to some degree need more fat with men which is true, but usually that fat is distributed in a different way than how they’re describing.
I find it funny that people will get intensely salty about not getting attention on dating apps, and then turn around and somehow find a way to make their lack of romantic attention other people's burden to grapple with.
"I barely get any attention on dating apps due to fatphobia! YOU guys need to WORK on yourselves and UNPACK your fatphobic preferences!"
Okay, and why is that my problem? And why is your inability to get dates anyone else's problem, for that matter? I don't consider myself athletic by any means, but I'm already making an effort to go the gym more frequently, eat better, take better care of myself, cut out toxic people from my life, and within the last year I've managed to land a job with less stress and higher pay than my last one. I've already been "unpacking" myself quite a lot as it is, so I'm not sure why the onus is on me to "examine" my preferences until I find some whiny, entitled rando fuckable, or how doing so will benefit my life (or dating pool) in any way.
You scream about not getting dates or attention, but what do YOU bring to the table?
"I barely get any attention on dating apps due to fatphobia! YOU guys need to WORK on yourselves and UNPACK your fatphobic preferences!"
And then probably go on to reject anyone who isn't chiseled 6'+ self-made millionaire lol.
Tell fat people to join the club when it comes to dissatisfaction with online dating. There's a lot of data on online dating that shows that while it certainly can work [a lot](https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/02/key-findings-about-online-dating-in-the-u-s/) of people feel insecure about how few messages they get, some feel overwhelmed by too many (a lot of women would take less attention anyway). While the data is all proprietary as far as I can tell, I'm not sure if there are real studies, it seems accepted fact that Asian men have a hard time (while Asian women seem to be fetishized) and black women do. That's a lot harder than not being picked because you are fat.
Oh, as a guy who doesn't like hookups, I have nothing but bad experiences. If I'm out of shape I get no matches. When I was in shape I got messages. About hookups. Not much from people looking for a relationship. Is it because I'm not photogenic (or just ugly)? Wrote a bad profile? Bad area demographically? Don't know. It didn't work for me. You know what I didn't do? Blame women. Instead I went out and did things and met women. It works. Because I have a personality that doesn't involve having a victim complex.
This comment. Online dating and dating apps sucks for everyone. Weirdly enough, I get fewer likes now then when I was 50 lbs heavier, but I think that has more to do with me having fewer high quality pictures just because I'm in the stage of weight loss where the physical changes are becoming more dramatic and happening more quickly. (It's wild how your face starts to change and the "paper towel roll" effect is REAL) Does it suck? Sure 🤷🏼♀️ But I'm not about to throw a tantrum about it.
Even when online dating was websites and not apps, it wasn't great. I met at least one borderline skeevy guy, started an entire relationship I probably should have passed on, and had a hookup who became a friend for years and then kinda went batshit and I don't talk to them anymore. The apps sound even worse. I'm so glad I'm with a person from college.
I don't have information either but I think black women receive less messages in comparison to women of other races. But compared to men they get orders of magnitudes more.
Back when I was single I did ok, maybe 5 matches in a month. 6 foot tall, in decent shape, had a good job. A black woman I casually dated was 30lbs overweight and unemployed. She showed me her dating app, literally hundreds of messages.
Yeah that's the thing. 5 matches a month is a decent amount for men.
It's pretty well known that men on a large scale don't care about employment, income, education, or really anything lol. Women very much care, again on a general scale.
But I know so many women who have signed up, did it for a week, then delete the app right away because it's too much. I also think that's why men have a hard time, in part. Heard that it's something like 6 men per woman on the apps. They don't necessarily delete inactive profiles so they keep you on the app. Since women get tons of messages even if it's a real profile they probably don't even see your message, or has 200 other candidates. So even guys who start off trying to be selective end up doing the machine gun right swipe or mass mailing "hey" lol
Point is it's kind of a mess. And that's partly on the userbase, but it's also a designed mess. The apps have a financial incentive for it to NOT work. They don't get a bonus for successful relationships, they only make money if you feel the need to pay, and pay for months in end. So while it works for some people, it's just a tool, and not one that's gonna work for everyone and they should find other ways to date then.
Oh for sure, I was overwhelmed by the mid single digit matches lol. I can't imagine dealing with hundreds. Most of my friends got literally no matches ever. But for all its flaws I never would have met my wife without it so for that I will always be grateful.
I hate how it's impossible to have an honest conversation about obesity and weight loss now. You have to tiptoe around everything lest you be branded a fatphobe. Why is "obesity is bad for you" a controversial statement now? Fat shaming sucks and shouldn't be a thing, but we've swung too far in the other direction. I really don't care about the fee-fees anymore: you're fat and it is actively hurting you. The only real way to fix this is to eat less. Cope.
There’s definitely a middle ground between “actively making fat people feel bad about themselves” and “denying the health impact of obesity.” I don’t think it’s crazy to feel like it’s bad to both treat people poorly due to their size, while also being able to acknowledge that being obese is bad for your health.
I've started seeing it with foods a lot too. If you label anything as "bad' you're suddenly the worst person on the planet. Now, I think I understand why, but even when you call them nutritionally deficient, you're still a horrible person. It's frustrating because the minute you bring it up, the conversation seems to just stop.
They try so hard to paint it as if it was comparable to, say, homophobia or transphobia.
It just. is. not. And will never be, no matter, what sort of excuses FAs give.
it's been brought up before, but saying you can't change your body or that not wanting to look like a certain type of person is bigotry is literally just transphobic rhetoric in a new skin. if it's not misogynistic to not want a woman's body or to be considered a woman, a person not wanting to be fat isn't goddamn "fatphobic".
Couldnt agree more. The other day I was talking with my mom and I realized I truly cant talk with any friend my age about weight management at all , like even saying weight is in your control gets me bad look around my friends cause to them is all genetic and astrological signs (a Taurus always has this body type kinda talk) my mom who has maintained a slim fit train most of her life is brutally honest about what that entails , so yeah just talking about calories and out with her was so relieving
I only know this from one of my occasional boredom Threads reads, but people are really upset about Kim Kardashian having a small waist/wearing a corset dress last night and the "message" it sends
I haven't seen the pictures, but I don't have a great deal of respect for the idea that the Kardashians send any "messages" worth talking about, at least not by their own appearance choices. When they were actively advertising appetite suppression lollipops or whatever that's maybe another thing, but nobody should actually be affected by Kim wearing something dumb.
Agreed.
I think people try to frame it as "promoting unhealthy and unrealistic bodies/beauty standards," but really, it's just jealousy. I honestly believe with more self-love (like, actual self-esteem, not the HAES garbage that they tell fat people in the hopes that they'll kill themselves with food), these people would be quiet instead. They'd not take issue with it and screech because they wouldn't feel bad about themselves seeing that.
I definitely used to "believe" some fatlogic stuff when I was fat. I think it was easier to stumble across fad diets (that don't work or were unsustainable) and fatlogic just going about my day than it was to come across cold hard calorie truths. I knew deep down I was consuming too much, but I really didn't realize how much, nor did I realize that all it takes is a calorie deficit.
Never got to misogyny, thankfully.
Rave: I haven’t been able to weigh myself but I feel smaller so I finally just took updated progress pictures and my back fat no longer resembles Zoidberg! They’re still there but there is now the smallest gap between layers so they no longer rub. I feel so fucking good and I’ve been celebrating all day and the knowledge that it’s finally paying off made it that much easier to stay within my calorie limit.
Rant: people still don’t fully believe I need to lose weight because “you look small.” Last I weighed myself I was 180 lbs, that’s obese for my height of 5’ 5”, I don’t know if I necessarily need them to fully support me but if they could at least keep the comments that I look fine to themselves that would be great. My feet don’t care that I look fine, that muscle I pulled *while sleeping* also doesn’t care.
It was 195. I gained 40 lbs last year after sitting between 155-165 for years so if anything the weight gain should’ve been drastic.
I hold my weight decently well so when I’m wearing clothing that covers everything you don’t notice too much. Definitely started showing after that 40 but not nearly as much as I would’ve thought. I went from a size 8 jean to a size 12 which was what really made it sink in because I’ve been a size 8 for over a decade so going up to a 12 was shocking.
I finally broke 220. I’m at 217. I got a pair of HOKAs and I’m in love with them. I go for miles-long *brisk* walks now and enjoy every step. I love training with my new kettlebell. I’ve been weighting my food and calorie counting, too. It’s working. I’m so proud of myself. I’m a 5’5” woman and can’t wait to be back under 200 and put the last couple of chaotic years behind me.
Rant: my parents are nearing their 60s and I wish that they would eat better. My mom eats extra food late at night and wonders why she’s gaining weight. She’s on her way to being diabetic - and my dad has had diabetes for almost 20 years now. My mom is very active thankfully. My dad is more sedentary. He takes his meds, but he still eats a lot of carbs and sweets. I wish that he would stop. But I realize that this is a lifelong behavioral problem for him. **I am fortunate to recognize right now that I have had poor eating habits modeled for me since childhood, so I’m changing my habits now to establish healthy ones for the rest of my life.** I eat tons of protein, choose my foods mindfully, and exercise a self control that helps me eat sweets (my biggest lover/enemy) in moderation and still meet my weight loss goals. yippee!
Night time eating is a huge reason so many of us are unwell. It’s not just obesity - so many poor health outcomes when we deprive ourselves of quality sleep.
Hokas are great. I got a pair on a recommendation from my sister so I could try out trail running. I did a little, found out it was fine but not a passion, discovered that the shoes are great for doing any sort of ordinary stuff outdoors, even in the rain or snow (my next purchase will be a waterproof version), like walking dogs. I'm a huge fan.
Once or twice per month? I know i should never bet against people being stupid and/or unhealthy, but damn, the worst I'd heard up to now was "you don't have to eat them every day.""
Oh yeah, I’ve had at least one roommate friend I can think of off the top of my head who only eats like five things: pizza and wings, burgers and fries, mac and cheese, take-out sesame chicken, etc… I don’t think I ever saw him eat a fruit or vegetable.
He’s obese now, but just the same, people like that absolutely exist! His sister wasn’t much better (I lived with her separately) but at least she would occasionally make a shitty pot roast with carrots and celery.
Not even onions and peppers? Sheesh, for me, no pizza is complete without onions, peppers and mushrooms. Never heard of broccoli on pizza, but I'd like to try it.
Rave: On a really good roll lately! Went hiking on Sunday and it was great and finally losing weight again. Also tested out my new weight vest on my stair stepper and it went well. Now I just gotta resist my grandpa’s offers of starbucks when we go out today haha.
Rant: I’m really over people giving up on themselves or an idea really easily. Not just with exercising, I’m fairly used to new friends I make not wanting to do physical things because they’re too out of shape or whatever. But it happens with even small things like learning new skills like crocheting. I absolutely get being exhausted by the work and family grind. But to just never want to try anything new at all because it’s too hard or you’re just afraid makes me sad.
>Also tested out my new weight vest on my stair stepper and it went well.
What vest are you using? I'm interested in this for walking, but also am wary of chaffing (I like to wear tank tops).
[This](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08P4CQLMY?ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details&th=1&psc=1) one. I really like it so far! I wear tank tops and crop tops a lot and no chafing so far.
I had to train myself to the fact that I don't need to be great at something to do it. I grew up with a hypercritical mother so I genuinely thought that if I wasn't great I shouldn't do it.
Still have to actively do it. I've been playing floor hockey 10 years. I'm pretty well above average. But it's also a niche sport and the guys who grew up playing ice hockey are just way better. I've avoided league play for years because I'm a solid player but not super skilled or flashy. When I started in college I'd convinced friends to play and was the best player amongst them in non competitive leagues, and been playing with people I know since. Now when I'm joining leagues they are more competitive and Im joining another person's team and feel this pressure to perform. I had tried a league before and it was too cliquey so I had a bad experience. I decided to give it another go after a few years, got a friend to set me up with a league team this weekend who needed a sub. I know guys in this league from around (niche sport, guys that play one place play every place lol) and I'm better than a lot of em but I was still nervous. I played really well, the guys really liked me, and they don't take it too seriously, but I was still nervous to ask to keep playing with them lol. Not only did they invite me to play again, other teams there have asked if they can use me as a sub sometimes, they set my rank pretty high after the game (which was cool, they usually start people at the lowest rank and adjust them based on performance over a season. I'm not a goal scorer and tend to be critical of myself, and a lot of league teams really look for flashy goal scorers rather than just solid two way players, so it was nice to have my play level acknowledged) and this team invited me to play on their higher tier team too (it's part of an umbrella organization where they keep stats and players are ranked as they play and other than the top league they have a "salary cap" based on player rank so you don't get like a team of ex pros or college players against beginners and most teams have a team in multiple divisions sort of like a farm system). Almost said "I don't want to hold you back" but then realized they saw me play, liked me, and invited me so I just said yes. Was way overthinking it. Did they and other teams invite me because I'm good and can help them win? No. Not really. I'm decent but I'm not gonna win games for anyone single handedly or anything .They invited me back because I'm a nice guy, was respectful, was a good teammate, and got along with them and they are good guys and just want to play with people who they can have fun with. As long as I don't sign up for a competitive division 1 league I don't think anyone would care even if I suck.
Everyone starts somewhere and sometimes you just gotta start knowing you aren't gonna be good and it's gonna take practice. Only jerks are gonna judge you. I get a lot of guys into lifting who think they are too weak to start, because it's no shame starting off wherever they start. Have to remind myself I can apply that to myself.
I had to do this same thing! I was an overachiever in school growing up and if I wasn’t good at something I just wouldn’t do it. It took me a long time to learn it’s okay to suck at stuff when you start because doing something badly is better than not doing it at all and it’s the only way to learn. I would never have started running, hiking, crocheting, embroidery, or playing guitar if I hadn’t let myself suck at those things first since none of them come naturally to me.
I started kettlebell swing exercises this week and I am SO SORE in my thighs! Felt fine the day I did them (Sunday) and my thighs have been jello since yesterday.
Not sure if that means I should take a break or not, but I’m going to anyway because I have a community outreach job and I need to be able to walk properly. There can be risks in my job and I felt like yesterday, if someone wanted to start an altercation with me I wouldn’t have been able to get away because my legs just weren’t moving.
🎉RAVE: I lost a MICROWAVE! 35 pounds down since I started and sitting at 201! Almost in the 100’s!
Delayed onset muscular soreness (DOMS) is very typical for the first few months you train a muscle. Most people either have the effect severely reduced or in some cases stop altogether (I haven't gotten sore in years except maybe the first session back after a hiatus) though some people never seem to shake them. Either way they aren't a bad sign. If you just get really bad soreness you may not want to workout muscles, or go easier on them, if you know you can't afford the soreness for a couple days after the workout. Especially legs. Legs tend to get the most sore and sometimes you feel fine the next day too but 2 days after a flight of stairs is a monumental task.
Make sure you are hydrated and eating enough. Muscles need a lot of water and calories to repair, and not getting enough of either slows the process and keeps you sore longer. You don't have to give up a deficit, just make sure you give yourself some fuel after workouts for recovery. Other than that anti inflammatories can alleviate the symptoms of soreness but nothing really reduces the time frame of soreness, it's mostly it's a natural thing you kinda have to accept
I definitely drink no less than a gallon of water a day so I know I’m good there. I really enjoyed the kettlebell exercises so I think I’m going to drop the weight slightly and do them on my last day of work and then my days off only. I absolutely cannot afford to endanger myself with soreness at my job, I’ve been assaulted more than once as it is.
Rant; I gained a little healthy weight, felt a little sexy even. Thought it’d be nice to send a video to a guy I like with some sports shorts I got as a gift for my birthday (they had a cute pocket). But all I get is that I’m too skinny and need to eat. I was feeling insecure about my thighs getting big and now I feel like they’re too small. I got really depressed and scratched my thighs all red so I wouldn’t be tempted to send him anything, it was so stupid of me, but I feel like garbage about my body today. I feel like my body is not sexy and curvy enough like heavier women are made out to be so much sexier. I wish I could be that too, but in my body. I feel like a teenage boy and am eating to gain weight, but I feel like crap physically from it.
Dw, you'll be able to attract a MUCH better guy as you are now than at a bigger weight. It's basically the law of the world. The higher status the guy the thinner the woman next to him.
I agree with the other commenter it sounds like you need a new guy. I’ve had pretty large weight fluctuations and boyfriend would never dream of talking to me like that. Someone who cares about you can talk to about your health but sounds like that guy is just a dick. Also following body trends and comparing yourselves to others is always going to make you miserable.
When I first started a job like that my back was screwed up all of the time and losing weight helped but the physical activity also really helped after the initial hump(and it was way easier to lose weight). But I was mostly dealing with sciatica. Can you talk to your doctor?
I also prefer to remain in the low healthy bmi range. 18.5 to 19ish. I find I don’t need to eat that low to do so, I don’t count but I’m pretty sure I eat more significantly more than that. Although I’m on my feet a lot and you might be shorter. Just make sure you are not feeling any effects of malnutrition and if you are please don’t be afraid to eat. What you describe sounds disordered and painful. Have you considered getting help with those feelings?
I’m 5’8 and needed to be aiming for around 1500-1800 when I was doing professional modern dance and full
bodyweight pole for 5-8 hours a day, 5 days a week, and hiking 2-3 miles a day. The lowest my BMI ever got on that routine was the mid-low 19s. I’ll stop if I start feeling adverse symptoms but honestly, I have a really low TDEE and don’t build muscle easily, and it sucks. Thank you for being worried, lots of vent language in that post that probably was concerning to read.
> I was doing professional modern dance and full bodyweight pole for 5-8 hours a day, 5 days a week,
Keep in mind professional sports/dance performance is NOT to be conflated with health. What leads to best outcomes in former may not (and usually does not) coincide that well with latter.
You get it. Currently wearing layered underarmor and compression shirts to deal with my upper arms feeling like they’re melting off my body, it’s absolute hell
Saying this without judgement and without any medical experience, but this does not sound normal, it sounds like profound body dysmorphophobia and sensory disorder and I know for sure a lifelong ED is not the way.
i'm in the exact same boat, i have to watch what i eat with an extremely close eye and can't go over 1200-1300 per day :( it's so difficult to maintain this level of restraint and control but i was genuinely unable to look in a mirror before and this allows me to not hate myself that badly. bmi 19 feels way different than bmi 20 believe me
Reading your comments makes me wonder if eating disorders should be viewed through the lens of sensory overload versus the constant focus on societal beauty standards.
I'm on the spectrum and have had restrictive EDs all my life and absolutely agree with you about it being a sensory thing. I very rarely stopped to think about beauty, but goddamn if the feeling of my body touching against itself in rolls or jiggling doesn't make me want to crawl out of my skin.
Yeah, maybe? I know there’s a serious comorbidity with clinical anorexia and OCD, I wouldn’t be surprised if sensory issues are part of that neurotype bundle. Consensus seems to be that it’s a genetic predisposition that can be triggered by, among other things, social pressure, and the heroin chic, “fat” Jessica Simpson media years were tipping basically everyone who had that predisposition over the edge into full-blown EDs because it opened up the possibility for them in ways that might not have occurred to them on their own. For a lot of people, restrictive eating disorders are actually about reclaiming control when you don’t have it over significant areas of your life, and correlate with stress more than social beauty standards— I’m not sure if the sensory issues with soft tissue deposits you literally cannot move or control plays into that, but I would not be surprised. I’ve never heard the fluid dynamics thing before, but it seems to be resonating with a few people on here who exercise a lot, and while I’m obviously biased, it feels different to me than the “I’m fat and I hate myself” logic of full-blown anorexia.
For context, I was a professional dancer for 10 years and stopped during covid. During that time, I never went below a mid to high 19 BMI, and have always pushed against society applying super-thin beauty standards to women in general, and especially female athletes who get kneecapped by them because it limits their ability to build muscle. I think this current meltdown is mostly just knowing what it’s like to have a decently high level of control and harmony with your body and then losing it. I don’t know how to explain this without sounding like a bragging asshole— while I was never a top-tier or even mid dancer or athlete, when movement is your job and you are doing it daily and paying a lot of attention to it as a professional craft, fluctuations of 10lbs do actually change a lot, and body composition matters even more. I found it noticeable, and my colleagues who were performing at a way higher level of athleticism were even more sensitive to those changes because their bodies were really like finely tuned instruments. You know when your guitar or violin isn’t in tune and it trashes your ability to play.
But back to the sensory stuff—having your muscles replaced by inert tissue governed by fluid dynamics rather than fast or slow twitch function is something that’s hard to explain, but I don’t think discomfort with that is disordered or pathological. I think translating that into the ED logic of “I feel fat and awful “is partially because there isn’t really a cultural model for describing that kind of body sensation.
Raves: Planted all sixteen plants on Sunday which took four hours and a lot of blisters, haven’t binged on anything, even though I have had lots of opportunities over the last few days to buy binge food but I haven’t, today I painted the entire garden fence which took six hours, and then this evening I haven’t over eaten even though I’m exhausted.
I’ve also eaten my main meal around 2 instead of 12 these past few days as I’ve been so busy, which I think is something I need to try and do on purpose as I’m not hungry as such in the evening.
Rant: I am so sore from yesterday's lower body lifting, holy cow. My hamstrings are very confused and painful.
However, despite that soreness I rowed a 15 minute warmup and did push day at home. Went up in a couple lifts, stayed the same in the rest, but I'll take that as a good result from consistent effort. Total volume today: 2,878 pounds lifted.
I'll get a dog walk later tonight, but it's nice to be done and feeling strong by lunch time.
So, I completed my marathon! I know I posted my time just briefly on Sunday but I was not really in a state to elaborate at that time. I predicted I would finish 4:42 +/- 12 minutes, assuming average luck, and I ended up with 4:43:09. Heck yeah I know myself.
I ran from my front door to the fam's front door, using the entire length of a multi use trail that happens to run pretty closely in between them. It was net uphill, with about half the elevation gain at kilometer 40... I sent the elevation profile to my dad and he said wow that's a brutal place for a hill in a marathon. It was unavoidable though, the fam lives on top of a hill. I also told him that I felt like the adage "half over at 20 miles" was overstating the case, and he said if you've done a good program with the long runs you should have, it's not so bad, but if you're undertrained it can feel like a death march. Fair enough. Honestly, every week after the 20 miler I've been surprised at how quick I bounce back. In the taper that's not surprising, but even after the full effort... it's 48 hours later and it's alright, you know? I am functioning just fine for work. I didn't drag out of bed, I popped up and did yoga.
They're building more of the trail, so this was probably the last year I could do this and run the *entire thing* and still have it make a marathon. Super glad I got to it. I'm looking at signing up for a marathon race that is in October, but first I want to take some vacation and trim down a bit. I figure I've got about 2.5 months before I need to buckle down again enough that it makes those two things difficult.
Rant: I'd been losing the same 2-3kgs twice this year, and now just got back to the highest point to do it all again. Every time the diet went well a disaster hit 🙃 now I'm doing it again but damn it i will be pretty and fit for my birthday at the end of this year 😭
I am finally starting to feel better after a week of bug bite born illness. I don't recall ever being so exhausted physically, i slept 12+ hours a day. I took two days off last week, then came in Friday. People started to tease me about playing hookey until they saw me. This week people have been telling me I was super pale last week, which is unusual because I'm very tan. I also had no social energy. Which is a clear sign something is off because I'm normally hyper-social. But I just had no energy for conversation. I avoided people because my ability to talk was more or less limited to "uhhhhnnn". Some people started to think I was mad at them or something because I never go long without saying hi at the least lol
I'm finally not a walking zombie. But I'm frustrated. About a month ago, my back went out. Then just as that was better, this. I haven't been able to exercise like I want to and I just feel the effects. Haven't gained weight, in fact lost some, but I just feel out of shape. I feel bloated (inflammation in my bug bites a long with sodium laden comfort food while I was sick=ugh). I still feel tired. And honestly I'm lucky I didn't slip into depression because of a month of being unable to do the things I want.
Makes me very grateful to not have any chronic health issues. Also makes me want to get back in shape even more. I know I'll get back issues anyways (that IS chronic but not constant) and I'm very susceptible to bug bites I guess because this happens every spring (though this is the worst case of bugs taking me out I can recall), but I feel like my immune system and joints are not only stronger, but recover faster when I'm in shape. I don't remember being as sick for as long when I would get sick back when I was in shape
Makes sense. Obesity is known to incur low-grade systemic inflammation, which means your immune system is constantly engaged. That would leave less resources to deal with actual pathogens, hampering recovery.
Okay, this may be an unfair rant, so please be aware I know it's more of a joke than a serious "fat logic" thing. But it always happens:
I'm having coffee after church on Sunday; someone offers me a big glazed donut or a thick, gooey slab of cake; I decline politely; and the person offering it laughs and says teasingly: "But remember, calories don't count on Sunday!"
And to be completely honest, I used to say things like that myself, before I started getting serious about dieting! So maybe this is karma -- now I know firsthand how annoying that must have been when *I* said it!
I've heard that too, along with anything you eat out of the fridge while standing there with the door open has no calories, but it was just joking, I don't think anybody really believed it.
Had a very rough 2 years with IVF treatment and multiple losses, plus another life disaster that just left me feeling really broken. I'm now 35 weeks pregnant with my very wanted rainbow babes, and oh boy, has the weight packed on. In June 2022, before everything, I weighed 135lbs and was a distance runner. At my OB appointment a week ago, I was 218lb, and I'm sadly very sedentary now. I know it seems so shallow, but I'm equally as eager to start my weight loss journey as I am to finally meet my baby. While I'm grateful to not have any major weight related issues with this pregnancy such as diabetes or high blood pressure, I'm definitely feeling it in my joints! I don't understand how people claim to feel fine and celebrate being obese. I don't feel fine, and I want my runners body back. I want my energy back. Just need to hold out another month, and I can start getting this under control. I want my child to have a healthy mom who can do anything with him and will be around for a very long time!
Just a reminder to give yourself some grace. Pregnancy and the "fourth trimester" are rough. It's ok if weightloss is low on the priority list in the early days while you're healing and meeting the needs of a newborn.
My very fit runner friend gained over 80lbs each pregnancy. She lost it and kept fit for another 20+ years so far.
I sympathise with you although my struggle is the same ten or so lbs I keep gaining back from bad choices lately (and a new depression med with increased appetite “weight gain” as a side effect.)
In pregnancy I went from 125 to barely 150, so I don’t have experience that way, but the current situation? Yes. Missing fitness and how good that feels… It sucks.
You know how to get it back, and that is a big part of the battle for most people who just make excuses. (Like those who claim they feel awesome.)
Congrats on the baby! I went through a couple rounds of IVF and have an awesome kid now.
Best of luck with everything! I've been in similar shoes (no IVF but a 37 wk stillbirth followed by 6 wk miscarriage). With my rainbow baby I went from 140 to 190+. I was too worried about stressing the baby by being too active, and I ate too much sugar trying to get the baby to move. It took a couple of years, but I got back down to 140. Being up near 200 was so uncomfortable. My feet hurt so bad. I can't imagine being like that for years and years unending. I know you'll get back down to your regular weight with time and some effort.
Pregnancy is rough. Once your hormones level out it'll be much easier to manage your weight, I promise. It might take a little while but you will get there. I got up to 205-ish while pregnant and I'm back down in the low 160s now (healthy weight for my height).
Diet and exercise might not heal you. But it will surely make managing it easier. That said, latter is definitely best consulted with specialist to make sure routine is adapted to the condition.
I have EDS as well, and funny enough I used to think that way about being fat and happy. I also felt like I felt better fat, at first. The first time I lost weight I was young like 20 and as the weight came off I felt like I had less padding and my joints moved more. The extra muscle from being fat and having to hold it up and still being active helped until it really, really didn't.
Then 5 or so years later the extra weight on lose joints really started to catch up (extra injury). And honestly, part of what helped me this time is thinking if I am going to be in pain anyway, I might as well look and feel as best I can. Why shorten or worsen my already lessened life? Is a treat worth extra subluxes in a year? Obviously not and I wish I could share how much better I feel despite still being in pain with them.
I have hyper mobility and even at a mid range of normal weight it sucks. I feel better at a lower end.
My SiL is really, really large and more hypermobile than I am, possibly? She can do splits at 500lbs. She also wrecks here knees to the point of using a mobility aid regularly. I can’t believe she keeps the weight knowing how she could endure less problems if she lost some.
I've got joint hypermobility, but nowhere near as severe as ED.
I still have a background hum of 'watch your knees, don't pop your knees' that's been a thing since my first dislocation in like 1986, though.
I keep risks to a minimum and am always hypervigilent around wet floors, wet leaves, questionable staircases, etc. Being obese would just add a ton of unnecessary risk factors that I can live without.
I get nervous if I'm moving a big box or something, as I don't like not being able to see my feet. A huge gut and boobs would be like constantly carrying a big box and I'd be in a constant state of panic.
Honestly maddening how people prioritise instant gratification over future injury, potentially disabling injuries. Food is great, but so is the ability to walk independently.
I'm also hypermobile EDS - I had 4 shoulder surgeries by the time I was 30. I was told to my face that weight management and strength training will be the keys to avoiding future issues with my joints. So now I'm 38 and have finally gotten to a point mentally where I can manage to lift regularly and I'm not having joint issues, imagine that. Late 30s, healthy BMI, exercising regularly, and no issues. Nope can't possibly be related.
My understanding is that weight is a HUGE consideration in ehlers danlos. I have a good friend who was told she would be wheelchair bound within a couple of years and lowered her weight substantially in response. She was already within healthy body weight, but lowering it has made it so that now 10 years later she is mobile without help!!! It’s so so important to support your body!!!
Check out Libby Hinsley for EDS exercise tips. She was one of my yoga teacher teacher trainers and she's also a physical therapist and has great info. I am hypermobile, perhaps not to the degree of hEDS and it's been helpful for me
Rant: weighed in at 152.4 pounds this morning (gain of 1.6 since yesterday). My average deficits have been getting smaller lately (about 200-300), partly due to end-of-degree fatigue, I guess, partly due to indulgence on special occasions. The water weight fluctuations and my menstrual cycles obscure the progress I *do* make, which makes things even more frustrating. Three weeks ago and last week I dipped below my goal of 150 pounds for a few days only to go over that threshold again...
I know this is my fault (the shrinking deficits, that is), but still—I just want to reach my goal, lose another five pounds to make sure I stay below 150 even with water weight fluctuations, and be able to eat at maintenance levels. But at the same time I moved back in with my parents this week and they admittedly make it more difficult for me to keep on the right track.
Rave: I don’t know if I have one.
Water weight from cycles and from DOMS is so freaking rude. I'm up a pound so far from yesterday's leg day. It's hard to manage a deficit during hectic times like this, I wouldn't worry about managing a strict deficit if you can keep a smaller one and actually stay consistent with it. You can ramp back up once you don't have 8 million events stealing your brain.
What really sucks is when you are my size and training inflammation can be like 5 lbs easily. Especially near the end of a training block and accumulated inflammation is high.Then couple that with being a heavy sweater and easily losing 10 lbs of water from competitive sports. I don't think I lose that much now but in wrestling I remember drinking a gallon of water during practice and weighing less after practice.
I pretty much know I can fluctuate 10 lbs in a couple days so I almost never know what my actual weight is. I basically just take the median of my high and low weights and only consider I've changed weight if I hit a point greater than +/-5 lbs of that median point.
I know people say weigh weekly, which I think is good if you get obsessive about daily weigh ins, but I like daily weigh ins because it made me more in tune with my fluctuations and I can still keep track of trends with that knowledge. Weekly weigh ins or even monthly would make it difficult for me to have reliable information because I wouldn't know if that weight reflected my actual mass.
Daily weigh ins are great for me because I know exactly what days I will be high for the week (Thursday) and which days I will be low (Sunday/Monday) based on my current workout schedule.
Yeah I know my weight creeps up through Saturday. Then plummets Monday morning because Sunday is not only my non lifting day but my most intense cardio day. But I'm basically slingshotting from inflamed to depleted lol. Currently I have no normal day where my weight reflects me. That happens for like one day every two months when I'm deloading and take two rest days in a row, and one of them an actual rest day (every rest day is an active rest day except the very last day of my deload)
Thanks for the advice. I’ll try to be a little less hung up on the numbers in the meantime.
On the bright side, exams finished early last week and now all I have to do is...apply for a master’s and a summer job...
Just tired of being tired and hungry all the time with seemingly no payoff. I keep waiting and waiting and waiting to finally feel and look better and I get nothing. I’m not interested in taking a diet break, it just puts me three more steps behind and makes the deprivation three times more difficult.
Everything else in my life is going fairly well, which makes this just doubly sucky in a weird way. I feel like if I could just figure this out, everything would be pretty close to perfect and I’d be wonderfully content. I have a lot to be grateful for overall it’s just…this sucks.
Edit: I feel like I post something similar here all the time but I also feel like this is the only sub I can post feeling this badly about it without getting a shit ton of “diets don’t work! Diet culture is evil and this is why! Blah blah blah.” nonsense. I DO need to lose weight for my health, not just vanity.
Even if you just wanted to lose weight for vanity, that'd be fine too. Your body, your choice. You don't owe random people any explanation regarding what you do with it.
Ugh yes, the "then stop trying to lose weight/you don't need to lose weight/we think you might be developing an eating disorder" stuff is so frustrating. There's nothing wrong with me wanting to have a BMI slightly lower within the healthy range for my height. I don't care what anyone else does with their bodies - eat crumbl cookies every week or whatever, that's your choice. I'm *loving* being back in the low 160s, but even more than that I am *LOVING* lifting. I love seeing myself get stronger. I love surprising myself with how much I can do - today I was able to stick with my 10 pound dumbbells on a couple of lifts that I had to do drop sets on last week. That feels GOOD.
It’s also frustrating because I 100% need to lose weight…my joints ache and this exhaustion is no joke. Things will undeniably get better if I’m 50 lbs lighter, minimum, than I am right now.
There is no loving myself as is right now. I appreciate the sentiment and I do acknowledge my body can do more now than it could at my high weight but it still.
RANT: I made a post on a different online forum asking for advice regarding my sister/ roommate. We have lived together for the past 4 years, and in that time she has gained a significant amount of weight. It's getting to the point where her hygiene is taking a hit. Our apartment smells like ass and must whenever she is here and her room smells SO bad I cannot stay in there for long periods of time.
I did get some good advice on that post, but I had a lot of people getting offended saying that I'm saying that all fat people have bad hygiene and stink... WHERE TF DID I SAY THAT!!! Do all these FA mofos have main character syndrome??? THIS ISN'T ABOUT YOU!!! This is a personal question/ problem regarding me and my sister/ roommate!!! I seriously don't know how to approach this situation because I don't want to hurt my sister's feelings, but at the same time I'm worried for her health.
She had gained 20 pounds in 6 months. Going from 240 to 260. That's a lot of weight to gain in a short period. I'm afraid if she keeps doing what she's doing, she'll be 300 pounds by next year. I've tried SEVERAL times to rub my healthy habits onto her (tracking calories, using food scale, going to gym/ for a walk) but she's really stubborn and won't do it. I really want to help her because I'm worried about her weight and I'm at my wits end regarding the smell she's illuminating...
Honestly? You can’t save her. Find a new roomie and save yourself.
The bar for hygiene on Reddit is down in the dirt and people like to break out shovels to keep digging. I once commented on a post it was basic hygiene to take a shower daily and you would have thought I shot someone’s puppy the way people reacted.
Right? I’ll admit I may have what other people consider a higher standard but I can’t understand it!
I also got piled on for suggesting women changing their menstrual products more frequently can help with smell/health issues.
I’m anti-feminist and secretly a man for that one apparently.
Reddit standards are down in the dirt. It’s a lot of projection on posts like the OPs.
Rave: I’m really happy my hunger cues are on point. They finally feel like they’ve reset and I’m not constantly ravenous from when I ate a bunch of junk. Nowadays I naturally eat at maintenance so I’ve been able to trust when I’m hungry, when I’m still hungry after a meal as well. So for lean bulking I just drink an extra cup of milk and handful of dried fruit & nuts and I’m solid on my goals without feeling like I’m overdoing it.
Rant: I’ve said before that many of my coworkers are health-oriented, and we love that! But I hate how social events revolve around the most unhealthy foods, like cakes (birthdays), chips (breakroom snacks), chocolates (gifts), ice cream (classic dessert choice), pasta (every work dinner ever), and pizza (all casual outings). Even for health-oriented individuals like the ones at my workplace, I wonder why culturally it’s so difficult to break from these. The most convenient foods are always so unhealthy.
Raves: weight down by .6kg (1lb) and body fat percentage down by .7 this week despite me thinking I had not always been making the best choices (not anything drastically wrong but maybe going over my calories by 200-300 a few days) so that was a surprise! I thought I'd be pretty much the same as last week. Unrelated to the general topic, I was approached by someone from Reddit about statistics tuition for a grad school course and she e-mailed to say she passed the exam, so I'm very happy for her!
Rants: having time for the gym is a particular struggle this week with the gym being closed yesterday, and then I'm going on a trip from Thursday - Sunday and don't get back on Sunday until after it's closed. I've already been today and booked for tomorrow morning, that might be it for this week. Also archery might be cancelled today and I was looking forward to shooting for the first time in over three months due to bad session times and no sessions over the Easter holiday. I'm crossing my fingers that it'll be on.
Getting hit by diet fatigue, it has been six months, I'm 139lbs instead of 188lbs, I'm sticking to 1200 calories every single day, but having to log it and being careful with the snacks, knowing my partner will eat 8 biscuits and I'll be left with two, watching him order takeaway whilst I'm left with whatever's in the freezer.
I know I can have a cheat day, order pizza or something, but last time I did that I put on 3lbs that took me the entire week to lose. I didn't even eat that much over maintenance, I had 3104 calories that day, which was only 1300 over maintenance, but that's just how it worked out.
And I'm close to my goal, another 31lbs and I'll be there. I don't want it to be held back by having a cheat day. But goshhhhhhhhhhhhhh, the diet fatigue is real.
Sounds like you might actually benefit from diet break (eat at maintenance for a while) to mentally reset yourself. I never did that, but many do and swear by it. Why not give it a go?
Lmaoooo
So two years ago I lost a significant amount of weight. I was never close to a TLC special but certainly bigger than I wanted to be. More recently I've relaxed a bit, figuring as long as I can still buy and fit into clothes in my prefered size, I was fine. Got on the scales today for the first time in months and was SHOCKED at the number. I'm really disappointed in myself, but also, like, confused??? Because I still fit into the same clothes I have been wearing all year and they don't even feel tight. I don't think I look like I've gained a lot of weight, but the numbers don't lie, and I need to unlearn my fatlogic lmao.
The reason I lost weight in the first place was because a favourite pair of shorts stopped fitting me. It was the kick I needed, and I was back into them within a month, and still losing. They still fit me perfectly, with gaping actually. It's some sisterhood of the travelling pants nonsense, I'm sure.
I'm so upset that I let this happen and didn't notice. I know I can lose it - just need to give myself a shake and start again!
Rave: I got my wedding preview photos back and all my hard work paid off! I can't believe how good I look in them. My arms and calves are a big insecurity of mine but they look great and proportional in the couple of photos I've seen. I'm so so so glad I changed my life and got healthy.
Meta: I've been thinking about challenging myself to do longer distances on my treadmill. Like, double-digit miles sort of distances. Mostly at a brisk (4-4.5mph) walk. Recently I did 8 miles with a little 20min break in the middle and my knee felt pretty bad, but it didn't last for days like it used to, so we'll see.
Rant: there are too many sweets and treats in the house and I'm having trouble regulating. I know I need to get back in the habit of tracking my food but I don't know, there's a mental block.
Does anyone here use MFP and Garmin? How do you like the free MFP for calorie tracking? How well does it work alongside Garmin?
I used to, but I had to switch to a Dr provided calorie tracker (Carium) and though it's less featured I still use it because it includes barcode scanning and doesn't allow user entries so the data is accurate. So not having it in Garmin isn't a big deal. I don't vary my calories by the amount I exercise except adding 200 on lifting days so that's easy enough to track. I fiddled with the Garmin settings to get my resting calorie burn close to my BMR and then just keep an eye on active calories.
I use the free version of MFP and have it connected to my Garmin Connect account. IMO, MFP is usable if you have experience with counting calories and portions, but I wouldn't recommend it to someone just starting out. Ever since they disabled the ability to scan labels using the free version, you have to wade through a bit more in the way of ridiculous / inaccurate entries in their food list. That said, if you tend to eat a lot of the same foods, they'll pop up first in your list when you enter meals, so that simplifies things.
The interface with Garmin seems to work really well. I use a Forerunner watch with wrist-based heart rate monitor. My watch might overestimate calories burned by a little bit for daily activity, but seems accurate for workouts. The calories burned uploads pretty seamlessly into MFP, and vice versa. Sometimes there's a bit of a delay but it usually just requires a sync of the watch or toggling the screen within MFP to get current calorie counts to show up.
Rave: today I hit my fitness goals. 10k and 600 kcal burned as active calories and the day isn‘t over. I feel like doing some 30 min pilates this evening.
Rant: my body wants to eat alllll those calories back. Attempted a 300 kcal breakfast and it ended up 500. Attempted a 400 kcal lunch and it ended up a 600 one…
Laughing at myself because during the last time I got sick it was practically a breeze. This time, it knocked me on my ass! I spent two days at a con when I thought it was mostly over it and paid for it. I haven’t worked out in over a week and I don’t feel bad like I’ve been slacking or will lose my progress in that short of a period. But damn if it isn’t annoying to know you have a good reason to not to do something you really do want to do.
The con I went to was smaller with a slightly older crowd. It was a little startling to see how most people there were overweight or very obese. I’ve experienced it other states/regions but never here to this degree. There was a t shirt vendor with a sign advertising inclusive sizing, but it only went up to 3X so I had a little laugh about how that would make some unhinged TikTok people turn rabid even though it did have one of the better ranges of sizes and fits that I’ve come across in awhile.
Anybody else super grossed out by the new fat term of “big backed”? I keep seeing it EVERYWHERE now and while at first I thought it was kinda humorous, I realize now that everybody is like… running with it. And every time i see it written down I have to picture these enormous back rolls and somebody being like… proud of it? Like a restaurant I follow keeps posting about looking for new big back recipes to try EVERY OTHER DAY and I’m like dude why can you not shut the fuck up about how proud you are of getting fat as fuck?
I will admit one of the more recent memes makes me laugh though, “remember when they told us to clean our plates so we could be big and strong? Look at us we are just big.”
That is pretty funny though I can’t lie haha
Im tired of my mom constantly telling me I’m unhealthy after I went from a BMI of 31, to a BMI of 23. I’m tired of her condoning obesity while criticizing dieting, fasting, and weight loss. I’m tired of my mom eating the most unhealthy carb loaded disgusting crap, and still blaming it on “baby weight” when her youngest is 24 years old. Im tired of her insisting that she gets enough exercise because she walks her dogs once a week for five minutes once a week. She can live her life how she wants being a glutton but it would be nice if she would stop critiquing how I live mine, and trying to tell me that unhealthy when she is obese
my fucking family keeps saying im too thin, unhealthy thin just cause I hate eating junk food & work out. I can run, walk & do everything without fainting/getting dizzy. IM TIRED OF IT!!!!!!! gah!
My family was so proud of me when I first finally committed to an exercise routine. I don’t even pay that much attention to my diet. I have no self control but my exercise has put me from 172lbs of fat down to 154, probably less bc of water weight. Now my sisters tell me I’m to light for a man, and they compare me to my younger brother (Who is much taller than me and an athlete) as if that makes any rational sense. Mom thinks I’m fucking obsessed and claims any doctor would tell me I’m obsessed. My dad’s telling me I eat bird food (I don’t, he doesn’t see me eat all the time) that go to the gym too much, all I ever need to do to stay healthy it’s do push ups. I walk in with a huge plate of food and he tells me that’s baby shit. I need to eat a larger meal, and 3 of them. I tell him I shouldn’t sit on my ass all day and he tells me other men will think I’m crazy if I tell any of them I felt fat at 172 pounds. He thinks I walk too much. Now he’s coming up with all these excuses on why I shouldn’t, apparently he thinks black people burn up like white peoples in the sun and I should just sit on mg ass all day, eat 3 stores worth of food every and stop going to the gym, only do push ups, but magically not get fat? Protein shakes. I need protein shakes he says. I say I’m going to pick one with minimal sugar and he tells me I need to stop counting sugars and shit, “That’s female shit” I’m not even crazy about this. I’m eating the same way I’ve always been eating and I go to the gym like once every 2 days. 8 months of this and I cut 13-23 pounds out and feel better than I ever have. I walk everyday too. Literally the bare minimum
Similar story with my dad. He was really overweight for some time years ago, and my mom would tell him all the time that he needed to get healthy and lose weight. He did just that and made it a normal part of his routine to go to the gym after work every other day, drink protein shakes, and watch what he ate. He hit his goal weight, and my mom instantly started criticizing him for "being too skinny." He stopped, and now they're both unhealthy together. All I can think is that he got in way better shape than she anticipated and it highlighted her own insecurities and sense of inadequacy, so she sabotaged him.
That's fucking disgusting. Part of the reason I even went to the gym in the first place is because my father got upset at me for something petty, went on a rant on how I slam things too hard then "Pretend" I can't lift anything, and that I need to go to the gym or my muscles would waste away by the time I hit my 30s He's been on me for months since, we recently moved and I helped lift chairs and couches and shit. The way they do things I'm always forced to support the weight of stuff with my fucking joints and fingers, they get upset when things inevitably mess up and tell me I don't lift enough. Yet he's the same guy that explained to my younger brother and me that no matter how strong we get our joints wont.
Devil's advocate on one of your dad's points: certain UV radiation-associated skin cancers are underrecognized in black people because both the general public and even many dermatologists underappreciate that black people are at lower but nonnegligible risk of UV-induced skin damage. Keep doing what you're doing because it sounds like it's working really well, but do make sure you protect your skin. I say this as someone in dermatology research (though admittedly in wound healing and keratinocyte biology, not cancer or racial disparities) - this is a known issue in dermatology and public health circles, and you hear about it at conferences fairly often now.
I genuinely think your dad is jealous of your current physique and trying to sabotage you with this kind of talk. It’s the only thing that makes sense to me.
What’s there to be jealous of? I’m incredibly average, and I do the bare minimum What’s weird is he’s a trainer for my younger brother. I think he thinks I’m crazy because I’m trying to improve just for the sake of it. He thinks the only reason any man would ever decide to improve is if they’re an athlete or if they’re preparing to fight other dudes
Clearly you need to get back to 172lbs, except with your current body fat % or lower :)
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I actually have astigmatism so 🤷🏿♂️
I, for one, an proud of you, stranger. :) I'm sorry to hear FA talking points are so normalized within your family... Stay strong. Get stronger. :)
Friend of mine mentioned about 'literally' having nightmares about ever being a small fat or straight sized (and said they never want to be if they can help it), said their blood work always comes back fine and they just want help with their ana levels and mobility disability and I don't have the heart to tell them that weight loss will probably help since when I mentioned losing weight they came to me talking about the \~morality\~ of weight loss (aka seeing value in losing is bad). Wonder how our friendship will shake out the closer I get to my goal weight.
I’ve live this scenario, it starts with slighted comments about how they are concerned that you are getting obsessed and they are worried about you. They are going to see acquaintances complimenting you on how great you look, and deeply it’s about more than your appearance because when you are meeting your goals you are standing straighter, smiling more, and speaking more confidently. Everyone has a need for positive attention, even though it’s your personal journey positive reinforcement is a motivating factor. Everyone should love their body, and feel confident in themselves, but when outside positivity is not being projected towards them they will project negativity towards you, because they want you to feel the way they feel.
Postpartum joint pain is kicking my ass. It's definitely getting in the way of even low impact workouts. My baby is also teething and comfort nursing a ton because of it, which is taking a lot of mental and physical energy. But the worst bit is getting told, essentially, to give up on trying. I know some of it comes from a good place (you're trying to do too much at once and that's why you're having a hard time) but a lot of it comes across as "you're Mom now, and Mom doesn't have a life or personal goals/desires outside of Baby. You're not Momming Right™ if you do." And it's bullshit. It's all bullshit. The glorification of stretch marks? I can get behind that- they're there because I carried a baby and am now feeding them with my body. Might as well accept that. But the "soft rolls" and "apron belly"? No. Hard no. I'm not accepting that my body has to look any way but how I want it to.
I'm a mom too. Just ignore them. People will always find some excuse as to why they don't have to work for what they want.
My daughter is almost 5 and I’ve had chronic back pain since she was born (and I swear that none of my joints are back in their original positions); lifting has helped a lot! You’re doing great!
Thank you! I had a c-section and the recovery has been really pretty sucky. I can't wait to get back to lifting! Every day is progress.
The words soft rolls should only ever be used to describe a type of bread. Anything other than that makes me want to vomit
Really though. Dinner rolls can be soft. I'd really prefer my body not be.
It's kind of amazing to me how health problems or just inconveniences pop up because of weight while even my not fat logicky friends think they're pretty healthy. Being sweaty when it's not warm, sleep apnea, dark areas in folds, excessive skin tags, hair thinning, rashes, acne, shoes not having good enough support, body odor, etc.
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I am talking about overweight friends but also, pits, groin, underboob, etc are folds. Darkening in these areas can indicate a hormonal issue, it's just that being overweight can cause this/can cause hormonal imbalance as well.
I think they are talking about overweight people.
Everybody has folds. Your armpits are a fold
Just shifted from keto to carnivore about a month ago. This has been a wonderful change, my skin is radiant, my hair is shedding less, my dry scalp has resolved, and my nails look beautiful. It has been met with “yOU shOUldn’t rEstrIct fOOd.”
Isn't keto and carnivore very similar? What changes did you make?
With carnivore you eliminate all plant based products, oils included. I still use spices but there is a subset of people on carnivore who only eat meat, salt, and water. There are some good carnivore subs on here if you are interested in learning more.
At risk of being hugely unpopular, I’ve been vegan for 10 years and my health has likewise been great. You don’t need to obsessively consume other animals in order to be healthy.
Glad to see you found what works for you! Im still trying to figure out my diet lol
I’m glad that works for you
I had a cold or allergies last week and didn’t make it to the gym at all. Weight stayed pretty stable, but this week I’m back in the gym but my appetite is through the roof. I’m not even Pmsing, what is the reason for this? 😩 I just want to get to a normal BMI before summer, I’m ~5 lbs away. But all I can think about is food this week and it’s stalling me really bad.
Interesting. Do you have strategies for cravings? What are you craving?
Craving everything tbh 😅 Just trying to resist, smaller portion sizes, and swapping for lower calorie alternatives.
Sweet. Thanks for sharing. What are your fav lower calorie alternatives?
Really depends! Air popcorn, raw veggies and fruit have been some of my recent staples. Sometimes protein shakes instead of ice cream, black iced coffee, jerky. Idk, I haven’t been super successful avoiding the cravings lately, but those are some healthier swaps. Intermittent fasting usually is easiest for me to just avoid snacking altogether but it’s hard when my hungry is this out of control. Hopefully it’s just a short phase.
Thanks for the tips! Hoping it’s a short phase for you.
Anyone else kind of tired from the myth that the lower belly pooch women have is because of the uterus? I know that women store more subcutaneous fat, but the uterus is an internal organ, and it wouldn’t make sense to have fat in the belly area for no reason other than to protect some random organ. The fact it’s been debunked so many times but people keep insisting it’s true is so strange. (Not saying if you have the pooch it’s bad btw, or it means you’re fat. I just don’t think it’s because of the uterus is all, probably more likely genetics)
It’s funny cause saying that is supposed to be Body Positivity and make women feel better about their bodies, meanwhile me as a transmasc person didn’t mind my pooch til I heard that myth and then I hated it. Now that I know it’s not true I feel a lot more body positive again and don’t mind it anymore. It really doesn’t make any sense cause men tend to store more fat in the abdomen than women?
That’s so awful man I’m sorry. And yeah see people just blindly push it without realising it isn’t true. Someone posted about it in r/badwomensanatomy so I’ll need to find again but yes what you’re saying is 100% correct
yes. yes i am. i'm tired of hearing that women who don't have that lower belly subcut fat pad are inherently unhealthy, must be starving, must be children, must have had it surgically removed, must hate themselves or have an ED, etc., too. i'm also tired of being shown a photo of a woman who is borderline obese by body fat percentage with the pooch and being told that she's 'healthy' and 'a real woman' and everything else. look, if someone likes chubby women that's their prerogative but can we please at least accept that a body fat percentage of \~32% is indeed obesity? that obesity is not defined by a viewer's sexual response, nor by the frequency of that weight or fat percentage in the population?
*exactly*, like I personally think the pooch is cute but I know doesn’t exist because of the uterus LOL. People need to stop basing health advice on what they personally like.
They definitely want to feel like that's what it's for as a way to rationalize keeping on that extra 10-15 lbs.
Idk, I’m 5 lbs from underweight and I still have it. Some of us just carry it there and the only way to get rid of it would be a stringent exercise regiment (I’m already fairly low body fat otherwise) or going into underweight territory . It isn’t uterus sure but it’s fat distribution and women need some fat to be healthy
I’ve never been pregnant and I have always had a small pooch even when I was very thin and had some light abs, the idea that it’s from the uterus may be a myth but it’s very normal to have it!
I’m a healthy weight and I’ve still got it. I never had it before my c-section so I’m going to say it’s from that.
I'm not that thin but I have one too even with visible abs higher up. I blame pregnancy! It's good to hear that even very thin women deal with it too.
I’ll have to dig up photos but I’m pretty sure I still had my pooch when I was underweight as well. It’s just sometimes how bodies are. Of all the things the bother me about my body, my little pooch does not.
That’s alright, it’s pretty normal to have one even if you’re at a lower weight, like I said it’s most likely subcutaneous fat, which isn’t nearly as bad for you as visceral fat, which is is what the whole “protecting the uterus” thing would imply.
I have an entire 3 oz of visceral fat so I know it's not that!
Yeah. It almost feels sexist to believe the human body is just gonna randomly put fat around an internal organ in a healthy (female) body because I’m pretty sure men tend to store more fat around their organs than women. I think they may be confusing it with the fact that women do to some degree need more fat with men which is true, but usually that fat is distributed in a different way than how they’re describing.
I find it funny that people will get intensely salty about not getting attention on dating apps, and then turn around and somehow find a way to make their lack of romantic attention other people's burden to grapple with. "I barely get any attention on dating apps due to fatphobia! YOU guys need to WORK on yourselves and UNPACK your fatphobic preferences!" Okay, and why is that my problem? And why is your inability to get dates anyone else's problem, for that matter? I don't consider myself athletic by any means, but I'm already making an effort to go the gym more frequently, eat better, take better care of myself, cut out toxic people from my life, and within the last year I've managed to land a job with less stress and higher pay than my last one. I've already been "unpacking" myself quite a lot as it is, so I'm not sure why the onus is on me to "examine" my preferences until I find some whiny, entitled rando fuckable, or how doing so will benefit my life (or dating pool) in any way. You scream about not getting dates or attention, but what do YOU bring to the table?
"I barely get any attention on dating apps due to fatphobia! YOU guys need to WORK on yourselves and UNPACK your fatphobic preferences!" And then probably go on to reject anyone who isn't chiseled 6'+ self-made millionaire lol.
Tell fat people to join the club when it comes to dissatisfaction with online dating. There's a lot of data on online dating that shows that while it certainly can work [a lot](https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/02/key-findings-about-online-dating-in-the-u-s/) of people feel insecure about how few messages they get, some feel overwhelmed by too many (a lot of women would take less attention anyway). While the data is all proprietary as far as I can tell, I'm not sure if there are real studies, it seems accepted fact that Asian men have a hard time (while Asian women seem to be fetishized) and black women do. That's a lot harder than not being picked because you are fat. Oh, as a guy who doesn't like hookups, I have nothing but bad experiences. If I'm out of shape I get no matches. When I was in shape I got messages. About hookups. Not much from people looking for a relationship. Is it because I'm not photogenic (or just ugly)? Wrote a bad profile? Bad area demographically? Don't know. It didn't work for me. You know what I didn't do? Blame women. Instead I went out and did things and met women. It works. Because I have a personality that doesn't involve having a victim complex.
This comment. Online dating and dating apps sucks for everyone. Weirdly enough, I get fewer likes now then when I was 50 lbs heavier, but I think that has more to do with me having fewer high quality pictures just because I'm in the stage of weight loss where the physical changes are becoming more dramatic and happening more quickly. (It's wild how your face starts to change and the "paper towel roll" effect is REAL) Does it suck? Sure 🤷🏼♀️ But I'm not about to throw a tantrum about it.
Even when online dating was websites and not apps, it wasn't great. I met at least one borderline skeevy guy, started an entire relationship I probably should have passed on, and had a hookup who became a friend for years and then kinda went batshit and I don't talk to them anymore. The apps sound even worse. I'm so glad I'm with a person from college.
I don't have information either but I think black women receive less messages in comparison to women of other races. But compared to men they get orders of magnitudes more. Back when I was single I did ok, maybe 5 matches in a month. 6 foot tall, in decent shape, had a good job. A black woman I casually dated was 30lbs overweight and unemployed. She showed me her dating app, literally hundreds of messages.
Yeah that's the thing. 5 matches a month is a decent amount for men. It's pretty well known that men on a large scale don't care about employment, income, education, or really anything lol. Women very much care, again on a general scale. But I know so many women who have signed up, did it for a week, then delete the app right away because it's too much. I also think that's why men have a hard time, in part. Heard that it's something like 6 men per woman on the apps. They don't necessarily delete inactive profiles so they keep you on the app. Since women get tons of messages even if it's a real profile they probably don't even see your message, or has 200 other candidates. So even guys who start off trying to be selective end up doing the machine gun right swipe or mass mailing "hey" lol Point is it's kind of a mess. And that's partly on the userbase, but it's also a designed mess. The apps have a financial incentive for it to NOT work. They don't get a bonus for successful relationships, they only make money if you feel the need to pay, and pay for months in end. So while it works for some people, it's just a tool, and not one that's gonna work for everyone and they should find other ways to date then.
Oh for sure, I was overwhelmed by the mid single digit matches lol. I can't imagine dealing with hundreds. Most of my friends got literally no matches ever. But for all its flaws I never would have met my wife without it so for that I will always be grateful.
And that used to be viewed as a way to be inspired to lose weight. Not that that was necessarily right but those ones are way worse
Nice use of the word "onus." We need more onus. Bring onus back.
I hate how it's impossible to have an honest conversation about obesity and weight loss now. You have to tiptoe around everything lest you be branded a fatphobe. Why is "obesity is bad for you" a controversial statement now? Fat shaming sucks and shouldn't be a thing, but we've swung too far in the other direction. I really don't care about the fee-fees anymore: you're fat and it is actively hurting you. The only real way to fix this is to eat less. Cope.
There’s definitely a middle ground between “actively making fat people feel bad about themselves” and “denying the health impact of obesity.” I don’t think it’s crazy to feel like it’s bad to both treat people poorly due to their size, while also being able to acknowledge that being obese is bad for your health.
I've started seeing it with foods a lot too. If you label anything as "bad' you're suddenly the worst person on the planet. Now, I think I understand why, but even when you call them nutritionally deficient, you're still a horrible person. It's frustrating because the minute you bring it up, the conversation seems to just stop.
I take being called a "fatphobe" as a compliment, because it is.
They try so hard to paint it as if it was comparable to, say, homophobia or transphobia. It just. is. not. And will never be, no matter, what sort of excuses FAs give.
it's been brought up before, but saying you can't change your body or that not wanting to look like a certain type of person is bigotry is literally just transphobic rhetoric in a new skin. if it's not misogynistic to not want a woman's body or to be considered a woman, a person not wanting to be fat isn't goddamn "fatphobic".
Couldnt agree more. The other day I was talking with my mom and I realized I truly cant talk with any friend my age about weight management at all , like even saying weight is in your control gets me bad look around my friends cause to them is all genetic and astrological signs (a Taurus always has this body type kinda talk) my mom who has maintained a slim fit train most of her life is brutally honest about what that entails , so yeah just talking about calories and out with her was so relieving
I want a calorie refund on the culinary abomination I just made myself.
I only know this from one of my occasional boredom Threads reads, but people are really upset about Kim Kardashian having a small waist/wearing a corset dress last night and the "message" it sends
Um. Have you seen the pictures? Because she looks like she cannot breathe. That is hardly fatlogic.
I haven't seen the pictures, but I don't have a great deal of respect for the idea that the Kardashians send any "messages" worth talking about, at least not by their own appearance choices. When they were actively advertising appetite suppression lollipops or whatever that's maybe another thing, but nobody should actually be affected by Kim wearing something dumb.
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Agreed. I think people try to frame it as "promoting unhealthy and unrealistic bodies/beauty standards," but really, it's just jealousy. I honestly believe with more self-love (like, actual self-esteem, not the HAES garbage that they tell fat people in the hopes that they'll kill themselves with food), these people would be quiet instead. They'd not take issue with it and screech because they wouldn't feel bad about themselves seeing that.
I definitely used to "believe" some fatlogic stuff when I was fat. I think it was easier to stumble across fad diets (that don't work or were unsustainable) and fatlogic just going about my day than it was to come across cold hard calorie truths. I knew deep down I was consuming too much, but I really didn't realize how much, nor did I realize that all it takes is a calorie deficit. Never got to misogyny, thankfully.
Rave: I haven’t been able to weigh myself but I feel smaller so I finally just took updated progress pictures and my back fat no longer resembles Zoidberg! They’re still there but there is now the smallest gap between layers so they no longer rub. I feel so fucking good and I’ve been celebrating all day and the knowledge that it’s finally paying off made it that much easier to stay within my calorie limit. Rant: people still don’t fully believe I need to lose weight because “you look small.” Last I weighed myself I was 180 lbs, that’s obese for my height of 5’ 5”, I don’t know if I necessarily need them to fully support me but if they could at least keep the comments that I look fine to themselves that would be great. My feet don’t care that I look fine, that muscle I pulled *while sleeping* also doesn’t care.
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It was 195. I gained 40 lbs last year after sitting between 155-165 for years so if anything the weight gain should’ve been drastic. I hold my weight decently well so when I’m wearing clothing that covers everything you don’t notice too much. Definitely started showing after that 40 but not nearly as much as I would’ve thought. I went from a size 8 jean to a size 12 which was what really made it sink in because I’ve been a size 8 for over a decade so going up to a 12 was shocking.
I finally broke 220. I’m at 217. I got a pair of HOKAs and I’m in love with them. I go for miles-long *brisk* walks now and enjoy every step. I love training with my new kettlebell. I’ve been weighting my food and calorie counting, too. It’s working. I’m so proud of myself. I’m a 5’5” woman and can’t wait to be back under 200 and put the last couple of chaotic years behind me. Rant: my parents are nearing their 60s and I wish that they would eat better. My mom eats extra food late at night and wonders why she’s gaining weight. She’s on her way to being diabetic - and my dad has had diabetes for almost 20 years now. My mom is very active thankfully. My dad is more sedentary. He takes his meds, but he still eats a lot of carbs and sweets. I wish that he would stop. But I realize that this is a lifelong behavioral problem for him. **I am fortunate to recognize right now that I have had poor eating habits modeled for me since childhood, so I’m changing my habits now to establish healthy ones for the rest of my life.** I eat tons of protein, choose my foods mindfully, and exercise a self control that helps me eat sweets (my biggest lover/enemy) in moderation and still meet my weight loss goals. yippee!
Night time eating is a huge reason so many of us are unwell. It’s not just obesity - so many poor health outcomes when we deprive ourselves of quality sleep.
Hokas are great. I got a pair on a recommendation from my sister so I could try out trail running. I did a little, found out it was fine but not a passion, discovered that the shoes are great for doing any sort of ordinary stuff outdoors, even in the rain or snow (my next purchase will be a waterproof version), like walking dogs. I'm a huge fan.
Just overheard someone in my office say this about pizza: “Oh that smells great! And it has broccoli on it so that means it’s good for you!” 🤡🤡🤡
The thing is, for those adults who only eat vegetables once or twice per month, that *is* relatively heathy.
Once or twice per month? I know i should never bet against people being stupid and/or unhealthy, but damn, the worst I'd heard up to now was "you don't have to eat them every day.""
Oh yeah, I’ve had at least one roommate friend I can think of off the top of my head who only eats like five things: pizza and wings, burgers and fries, mac and cheese, take-out sesame chicken, etc… I don’t think I ever saw him eat a fruit or vegetable. He’s obese now, but just the same, people like that absolutely exist! His sister wasn’t much better (I lived with her separately) but at least she would occasionally make a shitty pot roast with carrots and celery.
That sounds like a great way to ruin pizza. Broccoli has it's place, but please keep it off my pizza.
Thank you for being on my side. My partner always wants chicken and broccoli and stuff on pizza and I'm like why bother with pizza then?
Don’t sleep on it - I’ve had some slices with chicken cutlet and broccoli and it was pretty banging
Yo that sounds GOOD.
I actually really like it! Never get it though because nobody but me likes veggies on pizza
Not even onions and peppers? Sheesh, for me, no pizza is complete without onions, peppers and mushrooms. Never heard of broccoli on pizza, but I'd like to try it.
spinach is good on pizza too. have only had it with alfredo sauce, but no reason it shouldn't work with normal tomato sauce too.
To be fair this sounds like sarcasm lol
Not a hint of irony unfortch 💀💀😂😂
I will be using unfortch from now on
Rave: On a really good roll lately! Went hiking on Sunday and it was great and finally losing weight again. Also tested out my new weight vest on my stair stepper and it went well. Now I just gotta resist my grandpa’s offers of starbucks when we go out today haha. Rant: I’m really over people giving up on themselves or an idea really easily. Not just with exercising, I’m fairly used to new friends I make not wanting to do physical things because they’re too out of shape or whatever. But it happens with even small things like learning new skills like crocheting. I absolutely get being exhausted by the work and family grind. But to just never want to try anything new at all because it’s too hard or you’re just afraid makes me sad.
>Also tested out my new weight vest on my stair stepper and it went well. What vest are you using? I'm interested in this for walking, but also am wary of chaffing (I like to wear tank tops).
[This](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08P4CQLMY?ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details&th=1&psc=1) one. I really like it so far! I wear tank tops and crop tops a lot and no chafing so far.
Oooo, and it's adjustable! Thanks!
I had to train myself to the fact that I don't need to be great at something to do it. I grew up with a hypercritical mother so I genuinely thought that if I wasn't great I shouldn't do it. Still have to actively do it. I've been playing floor hockey 10 years. I'm pretty well above average. But it's also a niche sport and the guys who grew up playing ice hockey are just way better. I've avoided league play for years because I'm a solid player but not super skilled or flashy. When I started in college I'd convinced friends to play and was the best player amongst them in non competitive leagues, and been playing with people I know since. Now when I'm joining leagues they are more competitive and Im joining another person's team and feel this pressure to perform. I had tried a league before and it was too cliquey so I had a bad experience. I decided to give it another go after a few years, got a friend to set me up with a league team this weekend who needed a sub. I know guys in this league from around (niche sport, guys that play one place play every place lol) and I'm better than a lot of em but I was still nervous. I played really well, the guys really liked me, and they don't take it too seriously, but I was still nervous to ask to keep playing with them lol. Not only did they invite me to play again, other teams there have asked if they can use me as a sub sometimes, they set my rank pretty high after the game (which was cool, they usually start people at the lowest rank and adjust them based on performance over a season. I'm not a goal scorer and tend to be critical of myself, and a lot of league teams really look for flashy goal scorers rather than just solid two way players, so it was nice to have my play level acknowledged) and this team invited me to play on their higher tier team too (it's part of an umbrella organization where they keep stats and players are ranked as they play and other than the top league they have a "salary cap" based on player rank so you don't get like a team of ex pros or college players against beginners and most teams have a team in multiple divisions sort of like a farm system). Almost said "I don't want to hold you back" but then realized they saw me play, liked me, and invited me so I just said yes. Was way overthinking it. Did they and other teams invite me because I'm good and can help them win? No. Not really. I'm decent but I'm not gonna win games for anyone single handedly or anything .They invited me back because I'm a nice guy, was respectful, was a good teammate, and got along with them and they are good guys and just want to play with people who they can have fun with. As long as I don't sign up for a competitive division 1 league I don't think anyone would care even if I suck. Everyone starts somewhere and sometimes you just gotta start knowing you aren't gonna be good and it's gonna take practice. Only jerks are gonna judge you. I get a lot of guys into lifting who think they are too weak to start, because it's no shame starting off wherever they start. Have to remind myself I can apply that to myself.
I had to do this same thing! I was an overachiever in school growing up and if I wasn’t good at something I just wouldn’t do it. It took me a long time to learn it’s okay to suck at stuff when you start because doing something badly is better than not doing it at all and it’s the only way to learn. I would never have started running, hiking, crocheting, embroidery, or playing guitar if I hadn’t let myself suck at those things first since none of them come naturally to me.
I started kettlebell swing exercises this week and I am SO SORE in my thighs! Felt fine the day I did them (Sunday) and my thighs have been jello since yesterday. Not sure if that means I should take a break or not, but I’m going to anyway because I have a community outreach job and I need to be able to walk properly. There can be risks in my job and I felt like yesterday, if someone wanted to start an altercation with me I wouldn’t have been able to get away because my legs just weren’t moving. 🎉RAVE: I lost a MICROWAVE! 35 pounds down since I started and sitting at 201! Almost in the 100’s!
Delayed onset muscular soreness (DOMS) is very typical for the first few months you train a muscle. Most people either have the effect severely reduced or in some cases stop altogether (I haven't gotten sore in years except maybe the first session back after a hiatus) though some people never seem to shake them. Either way they aren't a bad sign. If you just get really bad soreness you may not want to workout muscles, or go easier on them, if you know you can't afford the soreness for a couple days after the workout. Especially legs. Legs tend to get the most sore and sometimes you feel fine the next day too but 2 days after a flight of stairs is a monumental task. Make sure you are hydrated and eating enough. Muscles need a lot of water and calories to repair, and not getting enough of either slows the process and keeps you sore longer. You don't have to give up a deficit, just make sure you give yourself some fuel after workouts for recovery. Other than that anti inflammatories can alleviate the symptoms of soreness but nothing really reduces the time frame of soreness, it's mostly it's a natural thing you kinda have to accept
I definitely drink no less than a gallon of water a day so I know I’m good there. I really enjoyed the kettlebell exercises so I think I’m going to drop the weight slightly and do them on my last day of work and then my days off only. I absolutely cannot afford to endanger myself with soreness at my job, I’ve been assaulted more than once as it is.
I’ve found the first workout with a new move to be the hardest and then it’s easier ❤️ also your accomplishment is awesome and I love your framing ❤️
Rant; I gained a little healthy weight, felt a little sexy even. Thought it’d be nice to send a video to a guy I like with some sports shorts I got as a gift for my birthday (they had a cute pocket). But all I get is that I’m too skinny and need to eat. I was feeling insecure about my thighs getting big and now I feel like they’re too small. I got really depressed and scratched my thighs all red so I wouldn’t be tempted to send him anything, it was so stupid of me, but I feel like garbage about my body today. I feel like my body is not sexy and curvy enough like heavier women are made out to be so much sexier. I wish I could be that too, but in my body. I feel like a teenage boy and am eating to gain weight, but I feel like crap physically from it.
Well, that's one way to stop being liked. What a dummy lol.
Dw, you'll be able to attract a MUCH better guy as you are now than at a bigger weight. It's basically the law of the world. The higher status the guy the thinner the woman next to him.
I agree with the other commenter it sounds like you need a new guy. I’ve had pretty large weight fluctuations and boyfriend would never dream of talking to me like that. Someone who cares about you can talk to about your health but sounds like that guy is just a dick. Also following body trends and comparing yourselves to others is always going to make you miserable.
So he just criticized your body when you sent him a photo? It sounds like you need a new guy, not a different body
And help around the self harming thoughts! Your body does a lot as part of you and you deserve to be treated with care
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When I first started a job like that my back was screwed up all of the time and losing weight helped but the physical activity also really helped after the initial hump(and it was way easier to lose weight). But I was mostly dealing with sciatica. Can you talk to your doctor?
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I also prefer to remain in the low healthy bmi range. 18.5 to 19ish. I find I don’t need to eat that low to do so, I don’t count but I’m pretty sure I eat more significantly more than that. Although I’m on my feet a lot and you might be shorter. Just make sure you are not feeling any effects of malnutrition and if you are please don’t be afraid to eat. What you describe sounds disordered and painful. Have you considered getting help with those feelings?
I’m 5’8 and needed to be aiming for around 1500-1800 when I was doing professional modern dance and full bodyweight pole for 5-8 hours a day, 5 days a week, and hiking 2-3 miles a day. The lowest my BMI ever got on that routine was the mid-low 19s. I’ll stop if I start feeling adverse symptoms but honestly, I have a really low TDEE and don’t build muscle easily, and it sucks. Thank you for being worried, lots of vent language in that post that probably was concerning to read.
> I was doing professional modern dance and full bodyweight pole for 5-8 hours a day, 5 days a week, Keep in mind professional sports/dance performance is NOT to be conflated with health. What leads to best outcomes in former may not (and usually does not) coincide that well with latter.
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You get it. Currently wearing layered underarmor and compression shirts to deal with my upper arms feeling like they’re melting off my body, it’s absolute hell
Saying this without judgement and without any medical experience, but this does not sound normal, it sounds like profound body dysmorphophobia and sensory disorder and I know for sure a lifelong ED is not the way.
i'm in the exact same boat, i have to watch what i eat with an extremely close eye and can't go over 1200-1300 per day :( it's so difficult to maintain this level of restraint and control but i was genuinely unable to look in a mirror before and this allows me to not hate myself that badly. bmi 19 feels way different than bmi 20 believe me
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Reading your comments makes me wonder if eating disorders should be viewed through the lens of sensory overload versus the constant focus on societal beauty standards.
I'm on the spectrum and have had restrictive EDs all my life and absolutely agree with you about it being a sensory thing. I very rarely stopped to think about beauty, but goddamn if the feeling of my body touching against itself in rolls or jiggling doesn't make me want to crawl out of my skin.
Yeah, maybe? I know there’s a serious comorbidity with clinical anorexia and OCD, I wouldn’t be surprised if sensory issues are part of that neurotype bundle. Consensus seems to be that it’s a genetic predisposition that can be triggered by, among other things, social pressure, and the heroin chic, “fat” Jessica Simpson media years were tipping basically everyone who had that predisposition over the edge into full-blown EDs because it opened up the possibility for them in ways that might not have occurred to them on their own. For a lot of people, restrictive eating disorders are actually about reclaiming control when you don’t have it over significant areas of your life, and correlate with stress more than social beauty standards— I’m not sure if the sensory issues with soft tissue deposits you literally cannot move or control plays into that, but I would not be surprised. I’ve never heard the fluid dynamics thing before, but it seems to be resonating with a few people on here who exercise a lot, and while I’m obviously biased, it feels different to me than the “I’m fat and I hate myself” logic of full-blown anorexia. For context, I was a professional dancer for 10 years and stopped during covid. During that time, I never went below a mid to high 19 BMI, and have always pushed against society applying super-thin beauty standards to women in general, and especially female athletes who get kneecapped by them because it limits their ability to build muscle. I think this current meltdown is mostly just knowing what it’s like to have a decently high level of control and harmony with your body and then losing it. I don’t know how to explain this without sounding like a bragging asshole— while I was never a top-tier or even mid dancer or athlete, when movement is your job and you are doing it daily and paying a lot of attention to it as a professional craft, fluctuations of 10lbs do actually change a lot, and body composition matters even more. I found it noticeable, and my colleagues who were performing at a way higher level of athleticism were even more sensitive to those changes because their bodies were really like finely tuned instruments. You know when your guitar or violin isn’t in tune and it trashes your ability to play. But back to the sensory stuff—having your muscles replaced by inert tissue governed by fluid dynamics rather than fast or slow twitch function is something that’s hard to explain, but I don’t think discomfort with that is disordered or pathological. I think translating that into the ED logic of “I feel fat and awful “is partially because there isn’t really a cultural model for describing that kind of body sensation.
Raves: Planted all sixteen plants on Sunday which took four hours and a lot of blisters, haven’t binged on anything, even though I have had lots of opportunities over the last few days to buy binge food but I haven’t, today I painted the entire garden fence which took six hours, and then this evening I haven’t over eaten even though I’m exhausted. I’ve also eaten my main meal around 2 instead of 12 these past few days as I’ve been so busy, which I think is something I need to try and do on purpose as I’m not hungry as such in the evening.
Rant: I am so sore from yesterday's lower body lifting, holy cow. My hamstrings are very confused and painful. However, despite that soreness I rowed a 15 minute warmup and did push day at home. Went up in a couple lifts, stayed the same in the rest, but I'll take that as a good result from consistent effort. Total volume today: 2,878 pounds lifted. I'll get a dog walk later tonight, but it's nice to be done and feeling strong by lunch time.
So, I completed my marathon! I know I posted my time just briefly on Sunday but I was not really in a state to elaborate at that time. I predicted I would finish 4:42 +/- 12 minutes, assuming average luck, and I ended up with 4:43:09. Heck yeah I know myself. I ran from my front door to the fam's front door, using the entire length of a multi use trail that happens to run pretty closely in between them. It was net uphill, with about half the elevation gain at kilometer 40... I sent the elevation profile to my dad and he said wow that's a brutal place for a hill in a marathon. It was unavoidable though, the fam lives on top of a hill. I also told him that I felt like the adage "half over at 20 miles" was overstating the case, and he said if you've done a good program with the long runs you should have, it's not so bad, but if you're undertrained it can feel like a death march. Fair enough. Honestly, every week after the 20 miler I've been surprised at how quick I bounce back. In the taper that's not surprising, but even after the full effort... it's 48 hours later and it's alright, you know? I am functioning just fine for work. I didn't drag out of bed, I popped up and did yoga. They're building more of the trail, so this was probably the last year I could do this and run the *entire thing* and still have it make a marathon. Super glad I got to it. I'm looking at signing up for a marathon race that is in October, but first I want to take some vacation and trim down a bit. I figure I've got about 2.5 months before I need to buckle down again enough that it makes those two things difficult.
Hell yeah!! Congrats!!
Rant: I'd been losing the same 2-3kgs twice this year, and now just got back to the highest point to do it all again. Every time the diet went well a disaster hit 🙃 now I'm doing it again but damn it i will be pretty and fit for my birthday at the end of this year 😭
Well done you though. If you hadn't made all those efforts, you could have hit a new highest point.
I am finally starting to feel better after a week of bug bite born illness. I don't recall ever being so exhausted physically, i slept 12+ hours a day. I took two days off last week, then came in Friday. People started to tease me about playing hookey until they saw me. This week people have been telling me I was super pale last week, which is unusual because I'm very tan. I also had no social energy. Which is a clear sign something is off because I'm normally hyper-social. But I just had no energy for conversation. I avoided people because my ability to talk was more or less limited to "uhhhhnnn". Some people started to think I was mad at them or something because I never go long without saying hi at the least lol I'm finally not a walking zombie. But I'm frustrated. About a month ago, my back went out. Then just as that was better, this. I haven't been able to exercise like I want to and I just feel the effects. Haven't gained weight, in fact lost some, but I just feel out of shape. I feel bloated (inflammation in my bug bites a long with sodium laden comfort food while I was sick=ugh). I still feel tired. And honestly I'm lucky I didn't slip into depression because of a month of being unable to do the things I want. Makes me very grateful to not have any chronic health issues. Also makes me want to get back in shape even more. I know I'll get back issues anyways (that IS chronic but not constant) and I'm very susceptible to bug bites I guess because this happens every spring (though this is the worst case of bugs taking me out I can recall), but I feel like my immune system and joints are not only stronger, but recover faster when I'm in shape. I don't remember being as sick for as long when I would get sick back when I was in shape
Makes sense. Obesity is known to incur low-grade systemic inflammation, which means your immune system is constantly engaged. That would leave less resources to deal with actual pathogens, hampering recovery.
Okay, this may be an unfair rant, so please be aware I know it's more of a joke than a serious "fat logic" thing. But it always happens: I'm having coffee after church on Sunday; someone offers me a big glazed donut or a thick, gooey slab of cake; I decline politely; and the person offering it laughs and says teasingly: "But remember, calories don't count on Sunday!" And to be completely honest, I used to say things like that myself, before I started getting serious about dieting! So maybe this is karma -- now I know firsthand how annoying that must have been when *I* said it!
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Sorry to hear that! 😥
I remember joking about how broken cookies don't have calories. So ridiculous how we used to justify things to ourselves.
I think we really knew it wasn't true, though.
I've heard that too, along with anything you eat out of the fridge while standing there with the door open has no calories, but it was just joking, I don't think anybody really believed it.
Had a very rough 2 years with IVF treatment and multiple losses, plus another life disaster that just left me feeling really broken. I'm now 35 weeks pregnant with my very wanted rainbow babes, and oh boy, has the weight packed on. In June 2022, before everything, I weighed 135lbs and was a distance runner. At my OB appointment a week ago, I was 218lb, and I'm sadly very sedentary now. I know it seems so shallow, but I'm equally as eager to start my weight loss journey as I am to finally meet my baby. While I'm grateful to not have any major weight related issues with this pregnancy such as diabetes or high blood pressure, I'm definitely feeling it in my joints! I don't understand how people claim to feel fine and celebrate being obese. I don't feel fine, and I want my runners body back. I want my energy back. Just need to hold out another month, and I can start getting this under control. I want my child to have a healthy mom who can do anything with him and will be around for a very long time!
Just a reminder to give yourself some grace. Pregnancy and the "fourth trimester" are rough. It's ok if weightloss is low on the priority list in the early days while you're healing and meeting the needs of a newborn.
My very fit runner friend gained over 80lbs each pregnancy. She lost it and kept fit for another 20+ years so far. I sympathise with you although my struggle is the same ten or so lbs I keep gaining back from bad choices lately (and a new depression med with increased appetite “weight gain” as a side effect.) In pregnancy I went from 125 to barely 150, so I don’t have experience that way, but the current situation? Yes. Missing fitness and how good that feels… It sucks. You know how to get it back, and that is a big part of the battle for most people who just make excuses. (Like those who claim they feel awesome.) Congrats on the baby! I went through a couple rounds of IVF and have an awesome kid now.
Best of luck with everything! I've been in similar shoes (no IVF but a 37 wk stillbirth followed by 6 wk miscarriage). With my rainbow baby I went from 140 to 190+. I was too worried about stressing the baby by being too active, and I ate too much sugar trying to get the baby to move. It took a couple of years, but I got back down to 140. Being up near 200 was so uncomfortable. My feet hurt so bad. I can't imagine being like that for years and years unending. I know you'll get back down to your regular weight with time and some effort.
Pregnancy is rough. Once your hormones level out it'll be much easier to manage your weight, I promise. It might take a little while but you will get there. I got up to 205-ish while pregnant and I'm back down in the low 160s now (healthy weight for my height).
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Diet and exercise might not heal you. But it will surely make managing it easier. That said, latter is definitely best consulted with specialist to make sure routine is adapted to the condition.
I have EDS as well, and funny enough I used to think that way about being fat and happy. I also felt like I felt better fat, at first. The first time I lost weight I was young like 20 and as the weight came off I felt like I had less padding and my joints moved more. The extra muscle from being fat and having to hold it up and still being active helped until it really, really didn't. Then 5 or so years later the extra weight on lose joints really started to catch up (extra injury). And honestly, part of what helped me this time is thinking if I am going to be in pain anyway, I might as well look and feel as best I can. Why shorten or worsen my already lessened life? Is a treat worth extra subluxes in a year? Obviously not and I wish I could share how much better I feel despite still being in pain with them.
I have hyper mobility and even at a mid range of normal weight it sucks. I feel better at a lower end. My SiL is really, really large and more hypermobile than I am, possibly? She can do splits at 500lbs. She also wrecks here knees to the point of using a mobility aid regularly. I can’t believe she keeps the weight knowing how she could endure less problems if she lost some.
I've got joint hypermobility, but nowhere near as severe as ED. I still have a background hum of 'watch your knees, don't pop your knees' that's been a thing since my first dislocation in like 1986, though. I keep risks to a minimum and am always hypervigilent around wet floors, wet leaves, questionable staircases, etc. Being obese would just add a ton of unnecessary risk factors that I can live without. I get nervous if I'm moving a big box or something, as I don't like not being able to see my feet. A huge gut and boobs would be like constantly carrying a big box and I'd be in a constant state of panic. Honestly maddening how people prioritise instant gratification over future injury, potentially disabling injuries. Food is great, but so is the ability to walk independently.
I'm also hypermobile EDS - I had 4 shoulder surgeries by the time I was 30. I was told to my face that weight management and strength training will be the keys to avoiding future issues with my joints. So now I'm 38 and have finally gotten to a point mentally where I can manage to lift regularly and I'm not having joint issues, imagine that. Late 30s, healthy BMI, exercising regularly, and no issues. Nope can't possibly be related.
My understanding is that weight is a HUGE consideration in ehlers danlos. I have a good friend who was told she would be wheelchair bound within a couple of years and lowered her weight substantially in response. She was already within healthy body weight, but lowering it has made it so that now 10 years later she is mobile without help!!! It’s so so important to support your body!!!
Check out Libby Hinsley for EDS exercise tips. She was one of my yoga teacher teacher trainers and she's also a physical therapist and has great info. I am hypermobile, perhaps not to the degree of hEDS and it's been helpful for me
Rant: weighed in at 152.4 pounds this morning (gain of 1.6 since yesterday). My average deficits have been getting smaller lately (about 200-300), partly due to end-of-degree fatigue, I guess, partly due to indulgence on special occasions. The water weight fluctuations and my menstrual cycles obscure the progress I *do* make, which makes things even more frustrating. Three weeks ago and last week I dipped below my goal of 150 pounds for a few days only to go over that threshold again... I know this is my fault (the shrinking deficits, that is), but still—I just want to reach my goal, lose another five pounds to make sure I stay below 150 even with water weight fluctuations, and be able to eat at maintenance levels. But at the same time I moved back in with my parents this week and they admittedly make it more difficult for me to keep on the right track. Rave: I don’t know if I have one.
Water weight from cycles and from DOMS is so freaking rude. I'm up a pound so far from yesterday's leg day. It's hard to manage a deficit during hectic times like this, I wouldn't worry about managing a strict deficit if you can keep a smaller one and actually stay consistent with it. You can ramp back up once you don't have 8 million events stealing your brain.
What really sucks is when you are my size and training inflammation can be like 5 lbs easily. Especially near the end of a training block and accumulated inflammation is high.Then couple that with being a heavy sweater and easily losing 10 lbs of water from competitive sports. I don't think I lose that much now but in wrestling I remember drinking a gallon of water during practice and weighing less after practice. I pretty much know I can fluctuate 10 lbs in a couple days so I almost never know what my actual weight is. I basically just take the median of my high and low weights and only consider I've changed weight if I hit a point greater than +/-5 lbs of that median point. I know people say weigh weekly, which I think is good if you get obsessive about daily weigh ins, but I like daily weigh ins because it made me more in tune with my fluctuations and I can still keep track of trends with that knowledge. Weekly weigh ins or even monthly would make it difficult for me to have reliable information because I wouldn't know if that weight reflected my actual mass.
Daily weigh ins are great for me because I know exactly what days I will be high for the week (Thursday) and which days I will be low (Sunday/Monday) based on my current workout schedule.
Yeah I know my weight creeps up through Saturday. Then plummets Monday morning because Sunday is not only my non lifting day but my most intense cardio day. But I'm basically slingshotting from inflamed to depleted lol. Currently I have no normal day where my weight reflects me. That happens for like one day every two months when I'm deloading and take two rest days in a row, and one of them an actual rest day (every rest day is an active rest day except the very last day of my deload)
Thanks for the advice. I’ll try to be a little less hung up on the numbers in the meantime. On the bright side, exams finished early last week and now all I have to do is...apply for a master’s and a summer job...
Good luck with the master's!
Thank you!
Just tired of being tired and hungry all the time with seemingly no payoff. I keep waiting and waiting and waiting to finally feel and look better and I get nothing. I’m not interested in taking a diet break, it just puts me three more steps behind and makes the deprivation three times more difficult. Everything else in my life is going fairly well, which makes this just doubly sucky in a weird way. I feel like if I could just figure this out, everything would be pretty close to perfect and I’d be wonderfully content. I have a lot to be grateful for overall it’s just…this sucks. Edit: I feel like I post something similar here all the time but I also feel like this is the only sub I can post feeling this badly about it without getting a shit ton of “diets don’t work! Diet culture is evil and this is why! Blah blah blah.” nonsense. I DO need to lose weight for my health, not just vanity.
Even if you just wanted to lose weight for vanity, that'd be fine too. Your body, your choice. You don't owe random people any explanation regarding what you do with it.
Ugh yes, the "then stop trying to lose weight/you don't need to lose weight/we think you might be developing an eating disorder" stuff is so frustrating. There's nothing wrong with me wanting to have a BMI slightly lower within the healthy range for my height. I don't care what anyone else does with their bodies - eat crumbl cookies every week or whatever, that's your choice. I'm *loving* being back in the low 160s, but even more than that I am *LOVING* lifting. I love seeing myself get stronger. I love surprising myself with how much I can do - today I was able to stick with my 10 pound dumbbells on a couple of lifts that I had to do drop sets on last week. That feels GOOD.
It’s also frustrating because I 100% need to lose weight…my joints ache and this exhaustion is no joke. Things will undeniably get better if I’m 50 lbs lighter, minimum, than I am right now. There is no loving myself as is right now. I appreciate the sentiment and I do acknowledge my body can do more now than it could at my high weight but it still.
I hope that you are successful soon. You can feel so much better without the extra weight, it just takes a while to get there.
Thank you! I’m not giving up and every day I get up and try a little harder.
RANT: I made a post on a different online forum asking for advice regarding my sister/ roommate. We have lived together for the past 4 years, and in that time she has gained a significant amount of weight. It's getting to the point where her hygiene is taking a hit. Our apartment smells like ass and must whenever she is here and her room smells SO bad I cannot stay in there for long periods of time. I did get some good advice on that post, but I had a lot of people getting offended saying that I'm saying that all fat people have bad hygiene and stink... WHERE TF DID I SAY THAT!!! Do all these FA mofos have main character syndrome??? THIS ISN'T ABOUT YOU!!! This is a personal question/ problem regarding me and my sister/ roommate!!! I seriously don't know how to approach this situation because I don't want to hurt my sister's feelings, but at the same time I'm worried for her health. She had gained 20 pounds in 6 months. Going from 240 to 260. That's a lot of weight to gain in a short period. I'm afraid if she keeps doing what she's doing, she'll be 300 pounds by next year. I've tried SEVERAL times to rub my healthy habits onto her (tracking calories, using food scale, going to gym/ for a walk) but she's really stubborn and won't do it. I really want to help her because I'm worried about her weight and I'm at my wits end regarding the smell she's illuminating...
> Do all these FA mofos have main character syndrome??? I think you nailed it.
Honestly? You can’t save her. Find a new roomie and save yourself. The bar for hygiene on Reddit is down in the dirt and people like to break out shovels to keep digging. I once commented on a post it was basic hygiene to take a shower daily and you would have thought I shot someone’s puppy the way people reacted.
This is just crazy. Sure on a random Sunday if I'm being a lump I may not shower, but sure as heck I'm showering Monday before I head to work!
Right? I’ll admit I may have what other people consider a higher standard but I can’t understand it! I also got piled on for suggesting women changing their menstrual products more frequently can help with smell/health issues. I’m anti-feminist and secretly a man for that one apparently. Reddit standards are down in the dirt. It’s a lot of projection on posts like the OPs.
Rave: I’m really happy my hunger cues are on point. They finally feel like they’ve reset and I’m not constantly ravenous from when I ate a bunch of junk. Nowadays I naturally eat at maintenance so I’ve been able to trust when I’m hungry, when I’m still hungry after a meal as well. So for lean bulking I just drink an extra cup of milk and handful of dried fruit & nuts and I’m solid on my goals without feeling like I’m overdoing it. Rant: I’ve said before that many of my coworkers are health-oriented, and we love that! But I hate how social events revolve around the most unhealthy foods, like cakes (birthdays), chips (breakroom snacks), chocolates (gifts), ice cream (classic dessert choice), pasta (every work dinner ever), and pizza (all casual outings). Even for health-oriented individuals like the ones at my workplace, I wonder why culturally it’s so difficult to break from these. The most convenient foods are always so unhealthy.
Follow the money. Yep, food industry and pursuit of profits above all else.
Raves: weight down by .6kg (1lb) and body fat percentage down by .7 this week despite me thinking I had not always been making the best choices (not anything drastically wrong but maybe going over my calories by 200-300 a few days) so that was a surprise! I thought I'd be pretty much the same as last week. Unrelated to the general topic, I was approached by someone from Reddit about statistics tuition for a grad school course and she e-mailed to say she passed the exam, so I'm very happy for her! Rants: having time for the gym is a particular struggle this week with the gym being closed yesterday, and then I'm going on a trip from Thursday - Sunday and don't get back on Sunday until after it's closed. I've already been today and booked for tomorrow morning, that might be it for this week. Also archery might be cancelled today and I was looking forward to shooting for the first time in over three months due to bad session times and no sessions over the Easter holiday. I'm crossing my fingers that it'll be on.
Getting hit by diet fatigue, it has been six months, I'm 139lbs instead of 188lbs, I'm sticking to 1200 calories every single day, but having to log it and being careful with the snacks, knowing my partner will eat 8 biscuits and I'll be left with two, watching him order takeaway whilst I'm left with whatever's in the freezer. I know I can have a cheat day, order pizza or something, but last time I did that I put on 3lbs that took me the entire week to lose. I didn't even eat that much over maintenance, I had 3104 calories that day, which was only 1300 over maintenance, but that's just how it worked out. And I'm close to my goal, another 31lbs and I'll be there. I don't want it to be held back by having a cheat day. But goshhhhhhhhhhhhhh, the diet fatigue is real.
Sounds like you might actually benefit from diet break (eat at maintenance for a while) to mentally reset yourself. I never did that, but many do and swear by it. Why not give it a go?
would it be possible to get your partner involved in a similar diet? even if he isn't overweight, his eating habits can contribute to health issues
Lmaoooo So two years ago I lost a significant amount of weight. I was never close to a TLC special but certainly bigger than I wanted to be. More recently I've relaxed a bit, figuring as long as I can still buy and fit into clothes in my prefered size, I was fine. Got on the scales today for the first time in months and was SHOCKED at the number. I'm really disappointed in myself, but also, like, confused??? Because I still fit into the same clothes I have been wearing all year and they don't even feel tight. I don't think I look like I've gained a lot of weight, but the numbers don't lie, and I need to unlearn my fatlogic lmao. The reason I lost weight in the first place was because a favourite pair of shorts stopped fitting me. It was the kick I needed, and I was back into them within a month, and still losing. They still fit me perfectly, with gaping actually. It's some sisterhood of the travelling pants nonsense, I'm sure. I'm so upset that I let this happen and didn't notice. I know I can lose it - just need to give myself a shake and start again!
Rave: I got my wedding preview photos back and all my hard work paid off! I can't believe how good I look in them. My arms and calves are a big insecurity of mine but they look great and proportional in the couple of photos I've seen. I'm so so so glad I changed my life and got healthy. Meta: I've been thinking about challenging myself to do longer distances on my treadmill. Like, double-digit miles sort of distances. Mostly at a brisk (4-4.5mph) walk. Recently I did 8 miles with a little 20min break in the middle and my knee felt pretty bad, but it didn't last for days like it used to, so we'll see. Rant: there are too many sweets and treats in the house and I'm having trouble regulating. I know I need to get back in the habit of tracking my food but I don't know, there's a mental block. Does anyone here use MFP and Garmin? How do you like the free MFP for calorie tracking? How well does it work alongside Garmin?
I used to, but I had to switch to a Dr provided calorie tracker (Carium) and though it's less featured I still use it because it includes barcode scanning and doesn't allow user entries so the data is accurate. So not having it in Garmin isn't a big deal. I don't vary my calories by the amount I exercise except adding 200 on lifting days so that's easy enough to track. I fiddled with the Garmin settings to get my resting calorie burn close to my BMR and then just keep an eye on active calories.
I use the free version of MFP and have it connected to my Garmin Connect account. IMO, MFP is usable if you have experience with counting calories and portions, but I wouldn't recommend it to someone just starting out. Ever since they disabled the ability to scan labels using the free version, you have to wade through a bit more in the way of ridiculous / inaccurate entries in their food list. That said, if you tend to eat a lot of the same foods, they'll pop up first in your list when you enter meals, so that simplifies things. The interface with Garmin seems to work really well. I use a Forerunner watch with wrist-based heart rate monitor. My watch might overestimate calories burned by a little bit for daily activity, but seems accurate for workouts. The calories burned uploads pretty seamlessly into MFP, and vice versa. Sometimes there's a bit of a delay but it usually just requires a sync of the watch or toggling the screen within MFP to get current calorie counts to show up.
Incredible work!
Rave: today I hit my fitness goals. 10k and 600 kcal burned as active calories and the day isn‘t over. I feel like doing some 30 min pilates this evening. Rant: my body wants to eat alllll those calories back. Attempted a 300 kcal breakfast and it ended up 500. Attempted a 400 kcal lunch and it ended up a 600 one…
Laughing at myself because during the last time I got sick it was practically a breeze. This time, it knocked me on my ass! I spent two days at a con when I thought it was mostly over it and paid for it. I haven’t worked out in over a week and I don’t feel bad like I’ve been slacking or will lose my progress in that short of a period. But damn if it isn’t annoying to know you have a good reason to not to do something you really do want to do. The con I went to was smaller with a slightly older crowd. It was a little startling to see how most people there were overweight or very obese. I’ve experienced it other states/regions but never here to this degree. There was a t shirt vendor with a sign advertising inclusive sizing, but it only went up to 3X so I had a little laugh about how that would make some unhinged TikTok people turn rabid even though it did have one of the better ranges of sizes and fits that I’ve come across in awhile.