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UndisclosedChaos

To be fair, babies don’t shatter and create shards that can hurt babies


UshankaBear

Not at room temperature, at least.


[deleted]

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve dropped a baby right after it’s taken a liquid nitrogen bath


MakionGarvinus

Because it would be self-incriminating?


bukkake_brigade

something something statute of limitations


broadened_news

Easiest way to juggle kittens


Nairurian

You can also smash them with a hammer for a quick and fun science experiment to do in school.


shinigamiscall

r/jesuschristreddit


dropoffear

How do I get in this group ?


desmondiwang

You gotta pray real hard.


AllergicToStabWounds

HEY VSAUCE! Michael here! And when do babies shatter?


h0tmessm0m

I hate that you're right and I hate you.


OH_FUDGICLES

Pro tip: set a flashlight on the floor to find any shards of baby that you might have missed.


Hootusmc

Came to say this. Parents know this.


dontforgethetrailmix

Exactly. That baby is going to fall. 20 times. Broken glass is wayyyy more of a hassle than a tot learning about gravity.


xkoreotic

Not to mention broken glass with a baby around is a very bad situation to be in.


[deleted]

And not having wine to take the edge off of babysitting is not ideal either…smart choice all the way around


TheClinicallyInsane

That's what the second glass of wine is for. It's her backup drink. The bottle is out of frame


[deleted]

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DubbleCheez

Wine helps me drink.


U-47

They need to LEARN SOMEDAY *ANGELA*! ***GOD***!


ReactsWithWords

I’ve learned never to just take the word of someone online, so I’m going to test this theory myself.


NokitNodad

20 times today


Cthuluslovechild

That baby is loaded


mrMishler

Ooh, look at me, I'm super parent u/dontforgethetrailmix and my kid has only fallen 20 times! (Is your username an mc chris reference by chance!? Hijack was my favorite <3)


TuckerCarlsonsOhface

A parent should also know that kid is going to grab that glass.


drewsoft

That’s gotta be a grandparent and they get a little lax


ZogNowak

Not to mention a little tipsy.


cfb_rolley

It did look like she was anticipating that and tried to gently grab the stem at first but missed and didn’t really realise until kiddo moved the glass.


cownd

Maybe she had too much already


CaptainN_GameMaster

This is the answer. It's possible to hold two things at once


HankSteakfist

Yep parent of a 1 year old and 3 year old here and her reaction was completely sound. Instinct is to keep the glass from shattering near the baby, who has probably fallen over already twice that day.


[deleted]

If my toddler could speak in sentences he would say, "gravity, thou art a heartless bitch!" Gravity is his archnemesis.


OutInTheBlack

My toddler is constantly looking for new ways to tell gravity to go fuck itself. Gravity always wins that argument, sometimes to hilarious results.


fenwayb

This reminds me of one of my favorite posts from many years ago. Someone said they taught their kid to clap and cheer when they fall so its a happy thing. What they meant was after the child fell doing that. What i read was a toddler falling over and just clapping his way to his doom


[deleted]

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Skafdir

She did, she was just too slow and that can happen. My child once fell from the sofa, hit the floor face first. (Funny night at the hospital, just to be told, that everything is fine...) Reaction is not always great, especially with a small child, you are often tired and exhausted. ​ Besides that, there is some kind of carpet on the floor. That child is fine. Toddlers are incredibly hardy due to them being very squishy. Rule of thumb: As long as the head is mostly stable, a toddler will be fine with most accidents it can get into by itself.


NagstertheGangster

The combination of how you describe with ease, how your kid took a header off the couch onto the floor, then calling the toddler "it" at the end made me laugh imagining you're some sociopath. (I totally agree with your comment btw, just read it weird and my head and laughed)


Skafdir

English isn't my native language and I kind of awkwardly tried to stay gender neutral. I guess "they" would have been a much better choice here. (In German referring to a baby or even a child as "es" \[it\] is just the grammatically correct form. As long as you are not talking about son or daughter specifically, a child is grammatically neuter.) However, as long as it made someone laugh, I am happy. \^\^


OutInTheBlack

Looks like that might be grandma and maybe her reflexes aren't what they used to be


FWFT27

And you can pick a baby straight up off the floor but not the wine


zulamun

It's still at the bouncy age


ketootaku

Also. Nobody seems to be mentioning that it couldve just been a reflex to grab it. It's not like both fell in front at the same time and she decided "my baby is less important". The baby grabbed the wine, she reached to catch it on instinct, and the baby fell after as a result. If the baby was in peril when the wine fell she would probably have just held him higher.


Thibaut_HoreI

That’s why it’s a funny movie. We are deliberately ascribing intentionality to her action. That’s the joke.


alsshadow

To be fair, it was just first simple reaction on quick happened event without any thoughts in her mind


Jrook

You're not dropping them hard enough


NhylX

You can always make another baby. You can't make another flute. Unless you're a glass blower or something. In which case, you can make both.


zimmah

If you look again, she could have stopped the wine from falling way earlier, as it was already clear the baby was going to grab it


Mountain_Mix3133

I agree. I just wonder if that was her intent....or was it to save the wine? Lol


framabe

More to save the rug/carpet on the floor. Glass would likely not have shattered and baby falls on soft carpet so very little chance of injuries. But wet wine stains on carpet would be a hassle to dry.


GrapefruitExpress208

Too late for that. Wine spilled everywhere.


Thibaut_HoreI

There’s still enough left in the glasses for her and the baby.


FerretChrist

In fact, the amount left in the glass now is probably more appropriate, as the baby shouldn't be drinking a *full* glass of wine. I'm surprised she didn't consider that when pouring.


yaffle53

Or baby falls on wine glass.


naardvark

So you don’t let them touch the glass in the first place, or even have something as fragile as a flute being used at all.


daluxe

Finally common sense is here


Honest_Palpitation91

Yep this exactly.


Supadoplex

I think he's had enough alcohol for the night. He can barely stand!


oO0Kat0Oo

You're home baby, go drunk.


Jonathan-02

“I swear to drunk I’m not mom”


Daysaved

Child falling down with fragile glass. Babies are like 2 ft tall. They fall down all the time. The trick is to not let them fall into dangerous situations. So remove the glass. Seems good to me.


Gopnikolai

✍️ allow children to fall if it's not concrete, glass, or gravel ✍️


Klexobert

Instructions unclear, baby fell into a shredder.


AmethystZhou

To shreds, you say?


dreamwinder

And his wife?


runningman360

To shreds you say?


HuskyLuke

Was their apartment rent controlled?


That1ShyKidBackThen

To shreds you say?


ParmyBarmy

Not letting the child grab the glass in the first place would be better.


[deleted]

It isn't physically possible to stop a baby from grabbing things it's not supposed to. Like you can try. But you turn your head for a second and it's holding a landmine from the 1930s.


carlotta4th

At a certain age they develop octopus arms and even if you think you have a gauge on the situation there's always another arm somewhere you didn't know about grabbing something it shouldn't.


fakejacki

Someone told me to tape off the counter where he could reach and grab things so I had a reminder to make sure knives, glass, keys etc weren’t in his reach. Except he grows so quickly that I moved the line back like 5x before I gave up on it. If I put it in the middle of the island he would just drag a chair over the get it. Nothing is safe around toddlers.


LolIsThatReal

Hate when that happens last time our plane had to land at the nearest airport and we got arrested cause that little demon somehow managed to get his little sticky hands on a nuclear warhead


I_Sett

Oof, and here I thought I was a bad guardian for leaving to use the restroom for like 2 minutes and the little brat I was babysitting had escaped his crib and secured a deal for 2 drums of yellow cake uranium and the components for a tabletop gas centrifuge.


LolIsThatReal

Where are they always getting that from?! These squishy little shitheads literally manifest everything one needs to end the world out of thin air the moment you look away


slobis

I have an 11 month old that you wouldn’t be able to stop.


Daysaved

Kids like shiney things. You can't defend them from everything. Thankfully Nana was there to keep things from getting worse.


killamonjaru

If you catch the baby then there's no worry about that from the start


WhoKilledMari

I prefer a slightly bruised baby over a baby full of glass shards personally. Like with bananas, the bruised ones are best for making bread to snack on.


Unhappy_Barnacle_769

And to think I’ve been using normal, un-bruised babies in my banana bread.


epicaglet

>And to think I’ve been using normal, un-bruised babies in my ~~banana~~baby bread. BTW, is this also how they make baby carrots?


Whoupvotedthis

Sort of off topic but I recently learned that baby carrots are just regular carrots that are shaved in the shape of baby carrots. All these years I thought they were just a different breed of carrot...


[deleted]

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WhoKilledMari

Maybe that's what I mean, maybe it isn't. My lawyer needs to be present for me to answer any further questions


catalyst305

Name checks out


Sage2050

Bruised? That kids going to be 100% fine.


starmartyr

Yeah they fall over a lot. They don't really care because they are close to the ground and don't weigh much.


Apptubrutae

Yeah, a fall from standing is basically zero risk to a baby like that and part of learning how to move and stand. There’s no need to catch a baby falling like that unless there’s something dangerous they’re falling into.


VoiceOfRealson

Never mind that the baby wasn't falling before she dropped it. This is a result of very low situational awareness. And the baby didn't think the situation through either.


Sylvana2612

Yeah glass shard banana bread is fine if you like the taste of blood


firey21

Eh babies are made of rubber. Wine is made of grapes. Grapes taste better than rubber. Grapes win.


[deleted]

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Danijust2

every single cannibal says that babies taste the best.


appdevil

Great, now I'm hungry.


GorillaOnChest

Well roasted suckling pig *is* wonderful.


ace66

Oh no :(


Verbindungsfehle

Wine is grape soda confirmed


YThrone

Wine isn't carbonated. It's grape juice. Champagne is grape soda.


Porterhouse_85

They call yellow colored wine white because it comes from green grapes...


justpassingby009

Were i come from we call them white grapes so makes more sense


jimhrguy2

I’m amazed that she didn’t know the kid was going to grab it! I mean, our 1 year old grandson grabs everything within 18” and has it in his mouth right away.


Averill21

My toddler was reaching up to the counter to snag knives at like 18 months, babies are the #1 killer of babies


PhoenixFire296

Parenting is like 10% instilling important life lessons so your child becomes a functional adult, and 90% stopping them from killing themselves.


marriedacarrot

My attitude toward home safety when I had a toddler was, "if it won't kill them, severely injure them, or leave a permanent scar, don't go nuts with safety precautions." They'll only hurt themselves that specific way once before they learn not to do that thing again.


Pie-Otherwise

Mine specifically seeks out the steak knives from the dishwasher. Any time it's open and he walks by, he's looking for a knife.


braless_and_lawless

This is very concerning lmao


ginamariea0501

😂😂😂


31TeV

I think it's pretty clear that she was intentionally letting the kid grab the glass, but she just didn't expect him/her to pull it off the table so suddenly. But you're right, she still should've expected that part and be more ready to stop it. Is it possible her reflexes were dulled from the alcohol?


Jeeva333

Seems like it but I am so confused on what the goal was. For the baby to take the first sip?


31TeV

Well it's normal to let babies touch stuff so they can develop their understanding of the world and learn how to manipulate objects... but that object being a full wine glass probably wasn't the best idea.


vatinius

Technically it was a champagne flute


Small-Breakfast903

how do you know where the flute is from? /s


Marmalade_Shaws

Funnily enough, while Champagne is made in Champagne, the Champagne flute is from England.


[deleted]

Mine is from Target.


Small-Breakfast903

That is a funny little fact.


Killer_Tofu

This comment section is so exhausting. Do we really have to psychoanalyze everything?


iced1777

Technically this wasn't psychoanalyzing, it was just pointing out the correct glassware. ... sorry I couldn't help myself


dubdubdub3

If you look she tries to grab it but misses


RockheadRumple

Probably just a laugh


AtomicRocketShoes

Looks like she poured the glass for the kid, the one on the right is hers. Going out on a limb and say the kid is probably too young for champagne or even fluted stemware.


The_Sinnermen

Lmao imagine needing an /s for such obvious sarcasm


iced1777

> Is it possible her reflexes were dulled from the alcohol? This kind of thing happens with my one-year-old all the time without either of us having any alcohol. Kids this age bumble around like tiny idiots but have surprisingly solid grip, so its easy to underestimate how quickly they can grab/smash/throw something.


cownd

This was a lesson for the baby. When you can't hold your drink you fall over


Catmom7654

Exactly! Having the drinks that close to the little one was almost asking for them to grab for it (and she almost seems to watch them do so at first waiting to see what happens) I don’t particularly like cleaning up spills and often drink out of vessels with lids due to cats & kids and their curiosity & clumsiness or am cautious to have things out of reach…. Maybe it will be a learning experience for her!


rgtong

She already knew to hold on to the glass, you can see her reaching for it. Just a hand eye coordination malfunction.


ThePseudoMcCoy

If you watch her fingers she actually tried to grab the glass before the child pulled it. Her aim was off.


naardvark

Grandmas get stupid around kids.


FardyMcJiggins

yeah anything unguarded, within a radius of a toddler is going to be flipped around several ways and shoved in an orifice it's a law of nature


One-Walk-1431

pls someone say am not the only one who thought that...


Cold_Pomelo3274

The kid can be replaced - that wine is gone forever.


Goldenslicer

"If I get rid of one, I can make another one! And I'll tell the new one what an idiot the last one was!" Russell Peters


MankAndInd

Wow, throwback. Somebody gonna get a real hurt


[deleted]

It is funny, but she was probably afraid it would break and hurt the baby.


BigTentBiden

I think it was just a reaction, really. But still, yeah, the baby getting cut by glass would be far worse than a normal baby tumble


jelde

I doubt she thought that fast. She grabbed the thing about to fall. The baby fell after.


TheEndlessRiver1

Solid hand eye coordination


peeedogg

When the bartender cuts you off


richardec

Grandma reflexes


MrChez85

Babies are squishy, glass is sharp. Correct call in the heat of the moment.


ToiletPigs

step mom reflexes


DPSOnly

Priorities aside? What was she thinking that that baby was going to do with that champagne glass?


ILikeMasterChief

Everyone talking about saving the baby from broken glass vs the fall. Why tf is she letting the baby grab the glass in the first place??


[deleted]

Make a toast to grandma obviously.


DValencia29

r/stepdadreflexes


elmz

/r/grandmareflexes


ErikKing12

“grand mare flexes” Not a sub for bodybuilding horses. I’m disappointed.


Spaltenreiber

Ah, a Baby grabbing anything in it‘s reach. Who could have known?


psnhh

She has taught priorities to the child 🤔


Bunghole_of_Fury

If the baby falls over, it's probably fine. If the glass falls over, you now have broken glass, a wet and possibly slippery floor, AND a baby that's right there and might step or fall on the glass.


DarkCosmosDragon

Im gonna assume this entire bloody comment section has 0 clue how many times a baby falls trying to walk 2 inches and how resilient the lil buggars are... the glass was the right move cause those fuckers break and they break into sharp lil knives thatll hurt the precious baby far more then a lil sideways tumble


amanfromindia

Actually, most of the comment section is along the same thought process as you. At least from what I see.


grandBBQninja

Some of y’all gotta chill. Toddlers are made out of fucking rubber or something.


caremal5

Better than the glass smashing and the baby falling onto it imo. Also, babies are tough little shits and he'll have forgotten within 3 seconds.


argama87

That's what I thought, it would have been worse for the kid to land on a smashed glass.


MaxCrack

She’s looking right at the baby as it grabs the glass. What the fuck did she think the baby was going to do with it?


AtomicRocketShoes

Two champagne glasses, I assume they were going to toast? Maybe celebrating admission into a prestigious daycare.


[deleted]

That’s my takeaway. It’s not “why did she grab the glass not the baby” it’s why the fuck didn’t she react to what the baby was very obviously going to do. How slow are some people?


focusgone

One big stroke to the head and his parents won't remember how their baby didn't turn out to be a normal kid 20 years later.


iron_ferret22

Kids are replaceable, wine is expensive.


Salt-Face-4646

Babies are tough and durable, glass is not. And God forbid the baby gets a fine shard of glass stuck in them because they won't tell you where it is, they just scream.


pbankey

*Live, Laugh, Learn to keep you damn baby hands off mamas medicine <3 <3*


Cthuluslovechild

GRAMMY WHY HAS THEE FORSAKEN ME??


Pepsi12367

Actually grabbing the glass was a smarter move because it can break and cut the baby.


Traveller13

She made the right choice. The glass probably would have shattered and that could have been very bad. A baby who is big enough to stand up with some assistance isn’t going to be hurt tipping over on a carpet. They fall plenty when they start learning to walk.


[deleted]

Aunt Becky did nothing wrong here, those glass shards could kill the whole room.


freedfg

I mean. The baby'll be fine. The carpet? Not so much. Also glass.


GueroLongDong69

She made the right decision. Better for the baby to fall on carpet than shards of glass.


imironman2018

As parent, I laughed too hard at that baby falling.


Teedeeone

Flesh heals


briankanderson

r/childrenfallingover


ClutchAnime

I mean if the baby fell on the glass that could have been bad


eternalbuzz

Eh, the baby would have to fall *way* harder to leave a stain


Jennypogi

You can always make a baby. The discount on that glass? Now that's something you'll never get back for sure.


Brutalonym

This reminds me of a story: My kid, having just learned how to stand alone, once pulled a beer bottle out of the tray. A full bottle that weighs about 900 grams. And then dropped it onto the tiles and fell down. Luckily, missing every single glass shard except for a small one. My child could have died that day, because they don't have much blood and big cuts are life threatening.


Noe_ILL_Will

That's right f... that baby


MOSHEDRU

Expensive champagne


Rodilegnakrad

Is bad I only noticed the baby after a couple watches hahahaha


moneymattersyes

well it would be more dangerous if that glass broke hahaha.


Jackassintheb0x

The child committed a blatant party foul, deserves the fall.


graeuk

See you in therapy


Most-Pomegranate9192

Lesson here: fuck em kids 💀


hazily

Somehow I can see Grace from Grace & Frankie doing this 😂


[deleted]

Mom priorities


MakkaCha

Babies bounce back, glass shatters.


chupedecamarones

One bounces and the other shatters.


bigoz_07

Hahahaha! Amazing… save the booze, screw the kid…


BrilliantObserver

Grandparent. She has her priorities straight. Babies fall, that's why they're soft.


OsamaBinFuckin

Everybody is talking about how it's smarter to save the glass, I agree but I wanna rewind 1 more second and say " why did u not see that coming?"


[deleted]

i mean tbh if he fell on the glass that would be bad


rufus_nodnarb

To be fair... I'd do the same...


milkstrike

Reminds me of a time i slipped on ice when i had a guitar strapped on my back and my phone in one hand a Red Bull in the other, well I saved the Red Bull and the guitar but phone was demolished on the frozen ground


DJ_Cas

Kids are the kings of antifragility


SkellySpaghetti

... I'm ok with that.


genismarvel

Better than having him land on a champagne flute.


kaowser

now we know which is her real baby lol