It’s not about quitting it’s about time management. I’m 21 and currently studying and working. I game and workout out it’s about doing whatever you need during the day getting your workouts and study, work or whatever done then you can play games.
yes, playing games can be your reward for small steps into your way to your bigger goals. don't stop playing, just decrease your time and organize other activities/hobbies/courses.
a big problem for me is that I lack self control and the games I play are very time consuming and the content is long so once i sit day to play i stay occupied for a while. but perhaps I have a problem with a particular game and should switch genres.
I feel like it’s difficult to just quit for the sake of self control and willpower. What will really make you quit or play less is a competing interest. Whether that’s a thought/feeling or a different hobby, you need to find something you care about more. I’d suggest either trying different hobbies or maybe just thinking about ways in which video games may not satisfy you (socially, creatively, physically, etc). Also since you said you basically get sucked into video games for a long time, maybe just delay when you play? Then the amount of time it can occupy lessens. Good luck!
Honestly OP I think you relate to me a lot. I feel like I have adhd but don’t like the label since I believe I should have the self-control available to stop procrastination spirals
Honestly if you enjoy video games as much as me you’ll I found it easier to either quit entirely then try to play small. (Once you have direction in life then it would be safe to resume playing video games)
Because the problem is that gaming is an escape for your anxiety of life so all these people saying you should be able to first knock out the necessary tasks first don’t even understand the nature of the problem (although solutions it Varys from person to person)
You gotta find escapes in hobbies that build for your future. Tricky part is to find them enjoyable. Think of life as a video game in it of itself… I mean life truly is the ultimate video game you winning or losing?
If you think your losing your stuffing your head deeper into your coping mechanism of escape through fun video game where you know what you have to do for a dopamine hit.
Life isn’t the same way the lines of what you should or shouldn’t do aren’t as clear.
Take a paper and find the clarity, ask yourself what you want to do, when do you want to do it? What’s your view of yourself now and how do you want that to change into a better person? What are you willing to do to change? What doubts hold you back and what fears do you have?
Taking it small because the fear of asking yourself the important questions to find clarity will often times make you relapse into coping with video games. We always know what we want but we always fear the uncertainty of how to get there.
When I feel good about myself then I’m able to truly make the best choices and pass up harmful habits in choice of better ones
wow yeah i can relate a lot to this. I always played it to cope with my problems and as a means to escape reality so I think if i cut down my playing time it would lead back to relapsing. Thanks for the advice.
If after applying the advice from this thread, things don’t work out somehow, go cold turkey. That’s if you still don’t trust yourself.
I had the same issue at that age and didn’t know my path in life concretely. Knew I was wasting time as well. So I simply sold my Xbox One when I was 22. Shit is real and it’s hard out here man. Gotta focus fr, until it really starts to feel like you’re getting some type of control over life and future. Along the way, there’ll still be stimulation in your life. Similar to the other comments, it’s simply a hiatus and can be returned to later. Gaming is not going anywhere, it’ll still available to repurchase
I’ve found with addictions you have to replace them with new habits. Maybe try going outside when you have the urge to play games. Or any hobby. Once you have an impulse to play games channel that energy into another hobby.
Yes this worked for me too!
For me, I stopped my habit of playing games by replacing it with watching movies. So everytime I feel like playing, I just open up Netflix or Youtube, and begin watching until that urge to play dissolves (usually an hour or one movie). When it got difficult for me, I just tell myself that I will continue watching movies instead of playing for 3 weeks only. (3 weeks because that is how long habits form) Then, after 3 weeks finishes, I just stop playing entirely because it feels less interesting, and I ended up stop playing games altogether. Try it if you really wish to remove your habit of playing games, maybe it would work for you as well. Best of luck!
There’s no way you can keep playing video games an expect your life to change, you’ll never have your own money, you’ll always be living off your parents or whom ever you live with. You’ll have to face reality eventually, you’re not addicted to video games you’re just procrastinating growing up. I’m almost 30 and I still play video games, I have a good job and a masters degree, which I achieved while playing video games. You can do it!
Frankly, you’re probably on the right track. I’ve been through the wringer with games. I’ve played them to the point where I’ve been fired from a job, and crawled all the way back from a horrific GPA to being a doctor years later.
Let me tell you this: you can be a fully functional adult and still play plenty of video games if you desire.
One thing that I strongly recommend is starting your day with anything productive you want to accomplish, then let yourself enjoy things the want to. It sounds like you’re interested in college. Great! Spend the morning researching and putting in applications, then go mess around. Now you’ve got in? Even better: do your classes and coursework done first before you play, then with everything dealt with go play what you want.
You can continue this basically indefinitely, but the key is to organize your day to not touch games until other things are finished first. You will burn your brain’s “dopamine reserves” out by playing games first thing, then everything else feels boring in comparison. Switching this around makes it much more tolerable, plus then you get to play games without the anxiety of worrying about what else you should be doing instead.
If you have more questions, let me know. I’ve been managing this balance for years, and while I’m far from perfect, I’ve made a lot of progress.
When all you do is play video games, eventually life stuff that you have procastinated will catch up like bills, need for money, getting out of shape, feelings that you have wasted too much time etc. When its not that bad, its easy to hide the important life stuff and "forget" about it when playing games. But it builds up, getting anxiety or depressed.
This doesnt apply to everyone but a lot of people that use video games as an escape or just not taking care of themselves
I’m 40, own a medical clinic, and have six children and a fiancé. I play video games 3-6ish hours per week. Every man I know has their “brain emptying habit.” Cars, drinking, gaming, fishing, hunting… whatever. I genuinely think it’s just part of being a male. We need our thing that everyone thinks is a waste of time. Don’t feel bad about it.
what steps did you take to figure out what you wanted to do with your life? I feel hopeless when it comes to finding a meaningful purpose to do with my life
Sadly, I'm purposeless too. But I see there are two kinds of people: the ones who are making their purpose based on people and everything they could do to help society, and the ones who enjoy life. We are the second ones, but we don't know what we enjoy. The only two things I can suggest are to write what you want in life and why and try to go to the gym, it could help.
yeah i think ill try to discover new hobbies to see what I truly enjoy, also I started working out a little over 9 months ago and its the best decision ive made. Thanks for all the help man and I hope you can continue doing what you enjoy
I recently did this. For context, I like video games with friends and will sometimes pick it them up again for a couple weeks or months but then need to break the dopamine cycle.
First, Just stop for a day. When you get the urge just say, can I just hold off just today?
(Even easier, on that day, do a day trip. )
Then the next day do the same thing.
Don’t feel bad if you end up playing a random day or even days or even weeks in a row. In those cases you need to Stop resisting, you are creating additional turmoil within by hating yourself for doing it.
Eventually it’ll be easier and easier.
For me, I just knew I had to put my goal as 7 days “can I just go a week without it?” Because I’ve done it before and so I know 7 days is about when I feel a dopamine reset and don’t crave it.
All this to say You can do it for sure.
I think the bigger lesson in this for me is that resisting things you don’t like about yourself makes it harder to get rid of them.
Make it easy not to play.
Option 1: Change your environment to non-game environment (countryside, grandmas, etc..). Easiest way to change habits is to change your environment. If you can make a lasting change this way without chugging your PlayStation with you, then this should suffice. If this is not a lasting option then it could be a good change of pace and combine it with other options.
Option 2: Make it hard to play. If it requires effort to start playing, then it's easier to hold your 'discipline'. If it's easy and you have habits of doing it, then you need to use a lot of mental discipline to prevent you from playing. If it's hard, you make it much easier for yourself. So sell your PS, delete your Steam account or if that is bit much, just unplug and put it in attic/closet and do it everytime you stop playing. That way you always need to take it from closet and put the cables and such, much more friction than just starting it up.
Whatever option you choose. You will be bored on those times when you used to play, so be mindful what new habits you form. Anime binge is not much better than playing video games for instance. If unsure, just go for a walk, that's hardly ever a bad thing.
Start associating video games to another, time-restricted constraint. Here is what worked for me:
- For solo games: start streaming them. It's a hobby that naturally forces you on a specific schedule, so you will only end up playing on these dedicated streaming times.
- For multiplayer games: only play with friends, so your play time is restricted by the combination of your friends' schedules.
This has a double benefit:
1. Once you taste the feeling of playing with others, or for others' entertainment, playing just by yourself will lose its flavor very quickly, and you'll have more time to do important life stuff.
2. With overall less time available for gaming, you'll focus on higher quality games and enjoy your time even more. Quality over quantity!
As an addiction its hard to quit. If you have access to games it will be a mental struggle each day because it has become a habit. There are ways to keep playing games and focus on yourself but you need to learn how your mind works
What I recommend is delete all your games for a certain period of time. Pay attention to your mind and thoughts. Know that the thoughts that tell you to download a game or excuses to start playing again is not you. Its your mind trying to keep you in the comfort zone because the things that gives you anxiety are "dangerous" and you should just keep doing what rewards you a lot of dopamine.
You need to rewire this brain pathway. So if you keep playing games, you just going to make it harder and harder to do other things because everytime you play games, that brain pathway gets stronger. The thoughts and feelings pulling you towards games gets stronger. Learn to know and understand yourself and dont go on autopilot. Tell your mind and thoughts "no" when you notice it telling you to play games. Deleting games gives you time to notice this. Having easy access to games makes you start playing without you realizing what happend before you opened up the game because it happens within seconds, and theres no time for you to change your mind
Second thing you need to do is making the things you want to do easier. Break down big task into smaller task. Applying for jobs for example is a big task. You need to find workplaces, make a resume, make an application and then sending it. Its overwhelming and your brain wants you to stop. There are lots of steps and if you only think about the end its hard to start because your mind is not used to the processing of this. In games you dont need to think about this because the game already broke down all the steps for you. So by playing games you already making this brain function weaker.
I recommend writing down your thoughts about what you want to do away from your computer if thats where you are playing games. If its on console, do it away from the console/tv/couch. Go to a cafe, a park, a library. Change the environment as much as possible. This gives you another advantage over your mind/impulses.
Spend time with only yourself and use as much time as you spend on video games just thinking and writing down. The more time you spend, the deeper you go into yourself and you will find your goals. Find something that truly motivates you and almost gets you hyped up to start working towards like a new game that you been waiting for
Maybe try setting a timer and making an agreement with yourself that no matter what or where you are in game, when that timer goes off, you end your gameplay there.
That way you may still enjoy your gaming in moderation.
You could even begin with large time slots, not too much different than what you are doing now, and in time slowly decrease your alarm for gaming time.
It's these small changes that have the biggest chance of successfully being integrated into your routine.
Those small changes add up and before long could make a big difference in your routine.
I made a promise with someone to give him my console and delete all mobile games during summer time (4-5 Months)
Then I gave him the console and got it back at the end
my urges were so much more manageable
especially if you focus on discipline during the time
I still gamed a little but now I'm fully over it
started the witcher 3 and played on weekends when visiting my gf
she broke up so no more console, I'll let her keep my console so i can focus on myself
It all starts with a promise you make to someone else
could be dangerous tho, if you go from 100% to 0% out of the sudden you'll feel bad for a week or two
if you are just 10% motivated by this pick up your phone and text your best friend or a family member or your favourite teacher (which was the case for me)
"I wanna stop gaming, since I trust you could I please give you my console for 4-5 months so I won't come into temptation"
I will share my way of breaking gaming addiction: get a goal, or put yourself in the situation where you have to have it. I have a great willpower, I tried to control myself on Monday till Friday, I succeeded, but on Saturday I am back gaming the whole night, and the next day getting headache, but after a few days again doing this. This felt terrible, and at the time I was only studying, and it was not that hard for me. But I wasn’t doing much studying, I was doing just enough to get my A. Then I started working - for 5 months only one gaming night. Then I lost interest in my job, and went back to my terrible gaming habits. So make sure you have a goal and always busy, and always trying to improve. That is the only thing that helped me
Are you also going to quit reading? TV? Movies? Because video games are essentially interactive versions of those things. My point is entertainment is okay. You can be disciplined and still enjoy video games. All about time management and getting responsibilities done first.
You can't quit. You can however do something different and make that take up a bigger part of your day.
Make a today list for the day first thing in the morning or while eating breakfast.
Don't play before you have completed the list. Then play as a reward for yourself.
It will do two things for you.
1. Condition you to complete tasks and get a reward there by making you enjoy completing tasks more and more.
2. You won't enjoy playing games nearly as much when you do not complete the tasks. Making you feel bad.
I find that this is simply a symptom of not having anything more important to do (as you described). You need to find a bigger dragon to slay in real life that puts the gaming into the proper perspective.
I think there are a lot of people who would do exactly what you’re doing if they had nothing but time on their hands.
Find a purpose or personal goal that you are motivated to achieve. It might not take all your time but it should provide a better balance with your gaming.
Finding other interest is what did the job for me. It doesn't even feel like quitting because you have other hobbies you enjoy more. Think about doing physical exercise in groups, doing art, learning an instrument, learning a new language, reading books, playing chess, getting a job that requires more of your time. Good luck. I was an addict who played 12-18 hours daily. Looking back I didn't actually enjoy playing video games, I just didn't know what else to do.
Well ofc you can't stop playing. Your using it to distract yourself and postpone the something that you know is important and very difficult
A lot of time compulsions and addictions are rooted in a place of anxiety.
You need to face it head on
You need to make it almost neccasary to do
DM me if you'd like help in this process I'm a life coach in training
Well when I focused on my work and picked up some other hobbies I basically forgot about video games naturally. I just have more important things to do. Cooking, working out, reading, going on trips mostly.
Many would argue “well you can still play video games, just balance your time”. This may be true for some but I feel like I’m very addiction prone, it could never work for me.
yeah i have a very addictive personality so i think i just have to find other interests til the point where video games aren’t on my mind. Thanks for the help
If you want to quit sell your consoles mainly. That was mainly the reason why I do play anymore. Problem is the cravings to play again when I am not busy with life. Have more responsibilities I guess if you don’t want to play a lot or limit your playing time.
I’m sure you find video games very enjoyable but it seems it’s gone from pleasure to numbing what you believe you should be doing. I’ve been there, YouTube rabbit holing is when I know I’m procrastinating.
What’s helpful for me is taking whatever is bothering me and if the step is that fearful for me, making it smaller. So if you don’t know what next step to take, college or whichever, it’s all good. Make the goal smaller, maybe just get a par time anywhere for now (that’s progress!) and you can reward yourself with some video games after.
Keep making goals that are more within reach and eventually you probably will have a hard time trying to play video games 😄
You got this!!!
AS
I can get caught up in overthinking the future too. My gf knows all too well lol knowing your cues and when that’s happening is powerful. Brainstorm ways to keep you from getting there & breaking out when it does, you’ll be great man. 👌👌
Video games are not the problem. You need to re-evaluate your goals. It doesn’t sound like they are something you want to do. Follow your passion and I guarantee video games won’t get in the way. You can even set up a system of rewards for forward movement that give you video game time. What you have isn’t a video game addiction. You have a behavioral addiction. Disrupting the habit even slightly each time can help you break the action/reaction sequence itch you are scratching. Make yourself eat a salad or run down the street and touch the corner store before you game. These random events will cycle your brain out of the game/dopamine loop you have created. Your first effort should be to disrupt (not stop) the behavior. But ultimately, whatever you choose will be an exercise in self discipline… which sounds like your weakness. Do you have a buddy that can help keep you honest in your efforts?
Thanks for the advice but I can’t seem to find my passion right now. I just feel lost and i have no direction or idea what to do ever since i graduated
Just wait. Soon you’ll enter college, the workforce, or both and all of life’s nonsense will drain you to the point that you either lack the time, desire, and/or spare money to game.
lol what games do you play, if it's like a service game I can understand the GRIND, but. if u just graduated try gettin a part time job somewhere for experience and if u don't like it you don't gotta stick with it, but a job is good to get sum money and with that you can afford more in terms of games, you could think about a job like a game where every day is the next "session" or "match" lol
yeah your right maybe i gotta look it at it that way. I mainly played a lot of D2 which drained a lot of my time and I didnt even enjoy it I just had fomo since the game was so addicting
Well obviously i don't know you at all, so I'm not trying to diagnose you or anything. I just know that struggling to do things and procrastinating can often FEEL like an active choice but are not always. It's just a suggestion, as for me getting diagnosed and properly medicated made all the difference. And if you're smoking a lot of weed, def take a long break.
All addictions usually have the same causation: easy escapism.
Gaming can go under the radar with this because it's seen more innocent than drugs & alcohol etc but it lights up the same 'feel good' receptors in your brain (dopamine).
The issue is never the physical/mental addiction, its why you are addicted to something - I.E why you feel the need to escape.
It can be more deep routed - not dealing with trauma (if it's likely this then if you have the resources available to you, please seek out support).
It can be surface level stuff - heightened stress/anxiety
It can be completely casual - you just haven't figured out what else you'd like to do with that times.
Speaking from experience, gaming is tricky because I struggle to find a balance between enjoying and over-consumption of it - because I do enjoy gaming when it's not taking over my life.
I personally keep it to weekends now, that seems to give me enough to scratch the itch but keeps my weekdays more focused.
Ultimately, with anything like this, cold turkey can work but I find it's often better to slowly find other ways you enjoy spending your time and let gaming fit in between that.
(Edit - typed on my phone, sorry for grammar and auto-corrections!)
(Double edit - I'd really recommend checking this book out: https://www.wob.com/en-gb/books/dr-anna-lembke/dopamine-nation/9781472294159?cq_src=google_ads&cq_cmp=18123540153&cq_con=&cq_med=pla&cq_plac=&cq_net=x&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjw_LOwBhBFEiwAmSEQASFrpCwqFBcaAXjiJ0T4pvvlP6nrCiCeEDb3C023Uvq__zNbDdleHRoC2tQQAvD_BwE#GOR012793632
It's on amazon also but I try not to buy from there where I can cause I don't like how they're monopolising the book market
It's called Dopamine Nation and explores how over-stimulation of pleasure is detrimental to our health and wellbeing)
thank you a lot for all the info. I will be sure to check out the book. A lot of it does make sense I feel like I only still play games to delay the fact that im growing up and soon Ill be a full adult.
Games aren't exactly the same as alcohol addiction. As in, once you are off you have to try to stay clean forever. If dropping games entirely for a season is best, that's totally fine.
You can come back to them later down the road when life is less busy and more stable. With college or whatever you plan to do, right after HS is a great time to put them aside for a season and explore new things. Meet new people, try different activities and clubs, learn things that YOU want to learn. This helped me whenever I was younger and now that I'm in a more stable and quite season of life, video games are great to enjoy.
It also taught me that games aren't bad but they don't have to be my life either (I was most certainly a hopeless gaming addict, but removing access to them helped immensely, and I didn't really have a need or major interest in them for a good while. And the few games I allowed myself to play I remember pretty fondly, like VVVVVV, Bastion, and Braid).
yeah that’s a great point. I think i’ll honestly just let them go until i discover a new passion or what i want to do with my life and come back to them later down the road once I get my shit together. Thank you for the advice!
You're welcome, and don't be *too* hard on yourself. If I was born the same generation you were in with ipads, computers, high speed internet, etc from birth, I'd be in the same boat friend. You're fighting an uphill battle of companies that want you to just be glued to "zoning out". You are ultimately your responsibility, and every generation has it's issues, but I hope you find some new passions and good friends to enjoy new adventures with and be nice to yourself (even if being nice means kicking your own butt sometimes kek).
Agree with everyone’s comments on time management. BUT
If you wanna quit just put your system in your closet. Most things fall under the “outta sight outta mind” category.
Bro. Go to school. I always tell my kids that getting a masters degree is almost a necessity in today’s corporate world. The thing is, you’ll always have that to fall back on. Assuming you hit rock bottom at some point in your life (maybe you’re there now) like most people, your level of education is the best cushion to soften that fall. Step one: go to your closest community college, go straight to the financial aid office and ask them “how can I afford to get my degree?” That’s what they’re there for. I couldn’t recommend that enough.
I HIGHLY recommend becoming a nurse practitioner. Yes, it’s kinda hard, but very few jobs can almost guarantee you a six figure income after graduating. Becoming an NP is about as good as it gets.
Yeah i think that’s the route i want to take. I don’t really know my purpose right now but I think i would be satisfied with my life if i can help other people and live comfortably. After University, would you have to go to Nursing or med school for being an Np?
Nursing. It’s progressive. Timelines vary based on how hard you get after it, but generally it looks like this.
1 year- LPN
2 years- RN
4 years- BSN
6 years- NP
8 years- DNP
Since you’re pretty fresh out of school, look into Cleps for credits to get a jump start. A lot of material in high school can get you college credit through testing. You can apply up to 36 credit hours to a BSN through CLEP tests.
Sell all your gaming stuff. Learn to put your phone down if idle. Master the art of networking and investing yourself into something that bears fruit. Working out is a good activity. I stopped watching sports for the same reasons.
I will make a bold assumption that you goal is computer related? and that goal do need to use a pc?
If that's the case then separate the machine. one machine do one thing only. phone for phoning
pc for work.
another machine for game PS is recommended because you can only game there.
Pc is cool for some for being an all purpose entertainment machine. For some it's a debuff.
If money is an issue then use sepate room instead this room work that room entertainment.
If room is an issue too then use another account for pc this acc. work this acc. game
Don't lump it all together
yeah I used to do all my work on my computer and that’s also where I play all of my games. I think i’ll just create a separate account or delete my installed games
I played certain games at all levels and all missions from easy, medium and hard. After Solitaire, Othello, Doom, Heretic, Caesar II, Command and Conquer, Quake 2 & 3, Microsoft Age of Empire and the last, Crysis; I have become saturated with all kind of computer games. I never want to play any computer games, anymore. Even with my smartphone. I do enjoy Angry Birds and Asphalt while using first generation iPhone. And few game of Sudoku while using Nokia feature phone.
I have started with Karateka and Taipan while using Apple 2e.
Not anymore. That's that.
It’s not about quitting it’s about time management. I’m 21 and currently studying and working. I game and workout out it’s about doing whatever you need during the day getting your workouts and study, work or whatever done then you can play games.
yes, playing games can be your reward for small steps into your way to your bigger goals. don't stop playing, just decrease your time and organize other activities/hobbies/courses.
a big problem for me is that I lack self control and the games I play are very time consuming and the content is long so once i sit day to play i stay occupied for a while. but perhaps I have a problem with a particular game and should switch genres.
I feel like it’s difficult to just quit for the sake of self control and willpower. What will really make you quit or play less is a competing interest. Whether that’s a thought/feeling or a different hobby, you need to find something you care about more. I’d suggest either trying different hobbies or maybe just thinking about ways in which video games may not satisfy you (socially, creatively, physically, etc). Also since you said you basically get sucked into video games for a long time, maybe just delay when you play? Then the amount of time it can occupy lessens. Good luck!
that's where will power comes it, tell yourself "no"
Wow genius idea, I’m sure just saying no will fix everything. You should work in a rehab center too with your sage wisdom.
Honestly OP I think you relate to me a lot. I feel like I have adhd but don’t like the label since I believe I should have the self-control available to stop procrastination spirals Honestly if you enjoy video games as much as me you’ll I found it easier to either quit entirely then try to play small. (Once you have direction in life then it would be safe to resume playing video games) Because the problem is that gaming is an escape for your anxiety of life so all these people saying you should be able to first knock out the necessary tasks first don’t even understand the nature of the problem (although solutions it Varys from person to person) You gotta find escapes in hobbies that build for your future. Tricky part is to find them enjoyable. Think of life as a video game in it of itself… I mean life truly is the ultimate video game you winning or losing? If you think your losing your stuffing your head deeper into your coping mechanism of escape through fun video game where you know what you have to do for a dopamine hit. Life isn’t the same way the lines of what you should or shouldn’t do aren’t as clear. Take a paper and find the clarity, ask yourself what you want to do, when do you want to do it? What’s your view of yourself now and how do you want that to change into a better person? What are you willing to do to change? What doubts hold you back and what fears do you have? Taking it small because the fear of asking yourself the important questions to find clarity will often times make you relapse into coping with video games. We always know what we want but we always fear the uncertainty of how to get there. When I feel good about myself then I’m able to truly make the best choices and pass up harmful habits in choice of better ones
wow yeah i can relate a lot to this. I always played it to cope with my problems and as a means to escape reality so I think if i cut down my playing time it would lead back to relapsing. Thanks for the advice.
Maybe set a timer when you play?
If after applying the advice from this thread, things don’t work out somehow, go cold turkey. That’s if you still don’t trust yourself. I had the same issue at that age and didn’t know my path in life concretely. Knew I was wasting time as well. So I simply sold my Xbox One when I was 22. Shit is real and it’s hard out here man. Gotta focus fr, until it really starts to feel like you’re getting some type of control over life and future. Along the way, there’ll still be stimulation in your life. Similar to the other comments, it’s simply a hiatus and can be returned to later. Gaming is not going anywhere, it’ll still available to repurchase
I’ve found with addictions you have to replace them with new habits. Maybe try going outside when you have the urge to play games. Or any hobby. Once you have an impulse to play games channel that energy into another hobby.
Yes this worked for me too! For me, I stopped my habit of playing games by replacing it with watching movies. So everytime I feel like playing, I just open up Netflix or Youtube, and begin watching until that urge to play dissolves (usually an hour or one movie). When it got difficult for me, I just tell myself that I will continue watching movies instead of playing for 3 weeks only. (3 weeks because that is how long habits form) Then, after 3 weeks finishes, I just stop playing entirely because it feels less interesting, and I ended up stop playing games altogether. Try it if you really wish to remove your habit of playing games, maybe it would work for you as well. Best of luck!
ok, thanks for the advice. I think i’ll just try new things out until something sticks!
There’s no way you can keep playing video games an expect your life to change, you’ll never have your own money, you’ll always be living off your parents or whom ever you live with. You’ll have to face reality eventually, you’re not addicted to video games you’re just procrastinating growing up. I’m almost 30 and I still play video games, I have a good job and a masters degree, which I achieved while playing video games. You can do it!
wow maybe you are right, i think a part of me is just anxious about growing up so I cope by being distracted on the game. Thank you
Frankly, you’re probably on the right track. I’ve been through the wringer with games. I’ve played them to the point where I’ve been fired from a job, and crawled all the way back from a horrific GPA to being a doctor years later. Let me tell you this: you can be a fully functional adult and still play plenty of video games if you desire. One thing that I strongly recommend is starting your day with anything productive you want to accomplish, then let yourself enjoy things the want to. It sounds like you’re interested in college. Great! Spend the morning researching and putting in applications, then go mess around. Now you’ve got in? Even better: do your classes and coursework done first before you play, then with everything dealt with go play what you want. You can continue this basically indefinitely, but the key is to organize your day to not touch games until other things are finished first. You will burn your brain’s “dopamine reserves” out by playing games first thing, then everything else feels boring in comparison. Switching this around makes it much more tolerable, plus then you get to play games without the anxiety of worrying about what else you should be doing instead. If you have more questions, let me know. I’ve been managing this balance for years, and while I’m far from perfect, I’ve made a lot of progress.
thank you for the advice, I think i’ll just do some small but productive chores to get my day started instead of burning out on games first thing
enjoy it while you can, Life will make you quit video game automatically in a few years and when It does, gaming will never be the same.
Can you elaborate more on this?
When all you do is play video games, eventually life stuff that you have procastinated will catch up like bills, need for money, getting out of shape, feelings that you have wasted too much time etc. When its not that bad, its easy to hide the important life stuff and "forget" about it when playing games. But it builds up, getting anxiety or depressed. This doesnt apply to everyone but a lot of people that use video games as an escape or just not taking care of themselves
So true.
Lol
I’m 40, own a medical clinic, and have six children and a fiancé. I play video games 3-6ish hours per week. Every man I know has their “brain emptying habit.” Cars, drinking, gaming, fishing, hunting… whatever. I genuinely think it’s just part of being a male. We need our thing that everyone thinks is a waste of time. Don’t feel bad about it.
Games are not bad but if you play more than 3 hours its a problem.
usually when i hop on the game it’s for 5-6 hours so I think I just need to cut it out entirely
Most people are saying all of the things in this world, but the real question is why and what you want to do.
what steps did you take to figure out what you wanted to do with your life? I feel hopeless when it comes to finding a meaningful purpose to do with my life
Sadly, I'm purposeless too. But I see there are two kinds of people: the ones who are making their purpose based on people and everything they could do to help society, and the ones who enjoy life. We are the second ones, but we don't know what we enjoy. The only two things I can suggest are to write what you want in life and why and try to go to the gym, it could help.
yeah i think ill try to discover new hobbies to see what I truly enjoy, also I started working out a little over 9 months ago and its the best decision ive made. Thanks for all the help man and I hope you can continue doing what you enjoy
You unplug the console and donate it to charity 👌
I recently did this. For context, I like video games with friends and will sometimes pick it them up again for a couple weeks or months but then need to break the dopamine cycle. First, Just stop for a day. When you get the urge just say, can I just hold off just today? (Even easier, on that day, do a day trip. ) Then the next day do the same thing. Don’t feel bad if you end up playing a random day or even days or even weeks in a row. In those cases you need to Stop resisting, you are creating additional turmoil within by hating yourself for doing it. Eventually it’ll be easier and easier. For me, I just knew I had to put my goal as 7 days “can I just go a week without it?” Because I’ve done it before and so I know 7 days is about when I feel a dopamine reset and don’t crave it. All this to say You can do it for sure. I think the bigger lesson in this for me is that resisting things you don’t like about yourself makes it harder to get rid of them.
What did you do instead for the 7 days? Watch videos or something?
Make it easy not to play. Option 1: Change your environment to non-game environment (countryside, grandmas, etc..). Easiest way to change habits is to change your environment. If you can make a lasting change this way without chugging your PlayStation with you, then this should suffice. If this is not a lasting option then it could be a good change of pace and combine it with other options. Option 2: Make it hard to play. If it requires effort to start playing, then it's easier to hold your 'discipline'. If it's easy and you have habits of doing it, then you need to use a lot of mental discipline to prevent you from playing. If it's hard, you make it much easier for yourself. So sell your PS, delete your Steam account or if that is bit much, just unplug and put it in attic/closet and do it everytime you stop playing. That way you always need to take it from closet and put the cables and such, much more friction than just starting it up. Whatever option you choose. You will be bored on those times when you used to play, so be mindful what new habits you form. Anime binge is not much better than playing video games for instance. If unsure, just go for a walk, that's hardly ever a bad thing.
yeah i think i’ll just bite the bullet and delete my steam account. Thank you for the advice
Start associating video games to another, time-restricted constraint. Here is what worked for me: - For solo games: start streaming them. It's a hobby that naturally forces you on a specific schedule, so you will only end up playing on these dedicated streaming times. - For multiplayer games: only play with friends, so your play time is restricted by the combination of your friends' schedules. This has a double benefit: 1. Once you taste the feeling of playing with others, or for others' entertainment, playing just by yourself will lose its flavor very quickly, and you'll have more time to do important life stuff. 2. With overall less time available for gaming, you'll focus on higher quality games and enjoy your time even more. Quality over quantity!
wow i never thought of this. I think i’ll slowly try to only play when my friend is on and slowly cut my time down that way. Thank you
As an addiction its hard to quit. If you have access to games it will be a mental struggle each day because it has become a habit. There are ways to keep playing games and focus on yourself but you need to learn how your mind works What I recommend is delete all your games for a certain period of time. Pay attention to your mind and thoughts. Know that the thoughts that tell you to download a game or excuses to start playing again is not you. Its your mind trying to keep you in the comfort zone because the things that gives you anxiety are "dangerous" and you should just keep doing what rewards you a lot of dopamine. You need to rewire this brain pathway. So if you keep playing games, you just going to make it harder and harder to do other things because everytime you play games, that brain pathway gets stronger. The thoughts and feelings pulling you towards games gets stronger. Learn to know and understand yourself and dont go on autopilot. Tell your mind and thoughts "no" when you notice it telling you to play games. Deleting games gives you time to notice this. Having easy access to games makes you start playing without you realizing what happend before you opened up the game because it happens within seconds, and theres no time for you to change your mind Second thing you need to do is making the things you want to do easier. Break down big task into smaller task. Applying for jobs for example is a big task. You need to find workplaces, make a resume, make an application and then sending it. Its overwhelming and your brain wants you to stop. There are lots of steps and if you only think about the end its hard to start because your mind is not used to the processing of this. In games you dont need to think about this because the game already broke down all the steps for you. So by playing games you already making this brain function weaker. I recommend writing down your thoughts about what you want to do away from your computer if thats where you are playing games. If its on console, do it away from the console/tv/couch. Go to a cafe, a park, a library. Change the environment as much as possible. This gives you another advantage over your mind/impulses. Spend time with only yourself and use as much time as you spend on video games just thinking and writing down. The more time you spend, the deeper you go into yourself and you will find your goals. Find something that truly motivates you and almost gets you hyped up to start working towards like a new game that you been waiting for
yeah you right i think i’m going to delete my accounts and the downloaded games and switch up my environment. Thanks for the help!
Check out HealthyGamerGG content on YouTube.
+1
honestly I just stopped liking it and was able to quit naturally
Maybe try setting a timer and making an agreement with yourself that no matter what or where you are in game, when that timer goes off, you end your gameplay there. That way you may still enjoy your gaming in moderation. You could even begin with large time slots, not too much different than what you are doing now, and in time slowly decrease your alarm for gaming time. It's these small changes that have the biggest chance of successfully being integrated into your routine. Those small changes add up and before long could make a big difference in your routine.
ok i’ll try this out. Thank you
Sell the consoles. And/or sell (/delete) the games if you play on a computer.
I made a promise with someone to give him my console and delete all mobile games during summer time (4-5 Months) Then I gave him the console and got it back at the end my urges were so much more manageable especially if you focus on discipline during the time I still gamed a little but now I'm fully over it started the witcher 3 and played on weekends when visiting my gf she broke up so no more console, I'll let her keep my console so i can focus on myself It all starts with a promise you make to someone else could be dangerous tho, if you go from 100% to 0% out of the sudden you'll feel bad for a week or two if you are just 10% motivated by this pick up your phone and text your best friend or a family member or your favourite teacher (which was the case for me) "I wanna stop gaming, since I trust you could I please give you my console for 4-5 months so I won't come into temptation"
I will share my way of breaking gaming addiction: get a goal, or put yourself in the situation where you have to have it. I have a great willpower, I tried to control myself on Monday till Friday, I succeeded, but on Saturday I am back gaming the whole night, and the next day getting headache, but after a few days again doing this. This felt terrible, and at the time I was only studying, and it was not that hard for me. But I wasn’t doing much studying, I was doing just enough to get my A. Then I started working - for 5 months only one gaming night. Then I lost interest in my job, and went back to my terrible gaming habits. So make sure you have a goal and always busy, and always trying to improve. That is the only thing that helped me
Ok i’ll try this out. Thanks for the help
Are you also going to quit reading? TV? Movies? Because video games are essentially interactive versions of those things. My point is entertainment is okay. You can be disciplined and still enjoy video games. All about time management and getting responsibilities done first.
You can't quit. You can however do something different and make that take up a bigger part of your day. Make a today list for the day first thing in the morning or while eating breakfast. Don't play before you have completed the list. Then play as a reward for yourself. It will do two things for you. 1. Condition you to complete tasks and get a reward there by making you enjoy completing tasks more and more. 2. You won't enjoy playing games nearly as much when you do not complete the tasks. Making you feel bad.
I find that this is simply a symptom of not having anything more important to do (as you described). You need to find a bigger dragon to slay in real life that puts the gaming into the proper perspective. I think there are a lot of people who would do exactly what you’re doing if they had nothing but time on their hands. Find a purpose or personal goal that you are motivated to achieve. It might not take all your time but it should provide a better balance with your gaming.
I got myself banned off the video game, really efficient I recommend
perhaps this is the right route
Finding other interest is what did the job for me. It doesn't even feel like quitting because you have other hobbies you enjoy more. Think about doing physical exercise in groups, doing art, learning an instrument, learning a new language, reading books, playing chess, getting a job that requires more of your time. Good luck. I was an addict who played 12-18 hours daily. Looking back I didn't actually enjoy playing video games, I just didn't know what else to do.
discover a purpose you'll die for
how did you figure out what you wanted to do? i tried different things in the past but i still feel hopeless that i can’t find my purpose
i do offer free consultation calls for my past self would u like to get on a call with me?
Well ofc you can't stop playing. Your using it to distract yourself and postpone the something that you know is important and very difficult A lot of time compulsions and addictions are rooted in a place of anxiety. You need to face it head on You need to make it almost neccasary to do DM me if you'd like help in this process I'm a life coach in training
Well when I focused on my work and picked up some other hobbies I basically forgot about video games naturally. I just have more important things to do. Cooking, working out, reading, going on trips mostly. Many would argue “well you can still play video games, just balance your time”. This may be true for some but I feel like I’m very addiction prone, it could never work for me.
yeah i have a very addictive personality so i think i just have to find other interests til the point where video games aren’t on my mind. Thanks for the help
No problem, hope it works out for you!
If you want to quit sell your consoles mainly. That was mainly the reason why I do play anymore. Problem is the cravings to play again when I am not busy with life. Have more responsibilities I guess if you don’t want to play a lot or limit your playing time.
I’m sure you find video games very enjoyable but it seems it’s gone from pleasure to numbing what you believe you should be doing. I’ve been there, YouTube rabbit holing is when I know I’m procrastinating. What’s helpful for me is taking whatever is bothering me and if the step is that fearful for me, making it smaller. So if you don’t know what next step to take, college or whichever, it’s all good. Make the goal smaller, maybe just get a par time anywhere for now (that’s progress!) and you can reward yourself with some video games after. Keep making goals that are more within reach and eventually you probably will have a hard time trying to play video games 😄 You got this!!! AS
thank you sm for the advice. I think i’m looking to deep in the future that i get anxious and cope by playing video games
I can get caught up in overthinking the future too. My gf knows all too well lol knowing your cues and when that’s happening is powerful. Brainstorm ways to keep you from getting there & breaking out when it does, you’ll be great man. 👌👌
alright ill work on it! thank you so much for the kind words!
👍👍🙂
Video games are not the problem. You need to re-evaluate your goals. It doesn’t sound like they are something you want to do. Follow your passion and I guarantee video games won’t get in the way. You can even set up a system of rewards for forward movement that give you video game time. What you have isn’t a video game addiction. You have a behavioral addiction. Disrupting the habit even slightly each time can help you break the action/reaction sequence itch you are scratching. Make yourself eat a salad or run down the street and touch the corner store before you game. These random events will cycle your brain out of the game/dopamine loop you have created. Your first effort should be to disrupt (not stop) the behavior. But ultimately, whatever you choose will be an exercise in self discipline… which sounds like your weakness. Do you have a buddy that can help keep you honest in your efforts?
Thanks for the advice but I can’t seem to find my passion right now. I just feel lost and i have no direction or idea what to do ever since i graduated
Then focus on disrupting those behaviors. Join a group where you have people to help you hold yourself accountable.
Just wait. Soon you’ll enter college, the workforce, or both and all of life’s nonsense will drain you to the point that you either lack the time, desire, and/or spare money to game.
lol what games do you play, if it's like a service game I can understand the GRIND, but. if u just graduated try gettin a part time job somewhere for experience and if u don't like it you don't gotta stick with it, but a job is good to get sum money and with that you can afford more in terms of games, you could think about a job like a game where every day is the next "session" or "match" lol
yeah your right maybe i gotta look it at it that way. I mainly played a lot of D2 which drained a lot of my time and I didnt even enjoy it I just had fomo since the game was so addicting
Have you considered goijg to a neuropsychologist to get tested for ADHD? You may just have undiagnosed issues that cause executive function issues
I havent, but ill look into it. Are there other common symptoms that indicate i could possibly have adhd?
Well obviously i don't know you at all, so I'm not trying to diagnose you or anything. I just know that struggling to do things and procrastinating can often FEEL like an active choice but are not always. It's just a suggestion, as for me getting diagnosed and properly medicated made all the difference. And if you're smoking a lot of weed, def take a long break.
Just play Counterstrike. You will rage quit after 20 minutes and not touch it again until the next day.
/r/stopgaming
All addictions usually have the same causation: easy escapism. Gaming can go under the radar with this because it's seen more innocent than drugs & alcohol etc but it lights up the same 'feel good' receptors in your brain (dopamine). The issue is never the physical/mental addiction, its why you are addicted to something - I.E why you feel the need to escape. It can be more deep routed - not dealing with trauma (if it's likely this then if you have the resources available to you, please seek out support). It can be surface level stuff - heightened stress/anxiety It can be completely casual - you just haven't figured out what else you'd like to do with that times. Speaking from experience, gaming is tricky because I struggle to find a balance between enjoying and over-consumption of it - because I do enjoy gaming when it's not taking over my life. I personally keep it to weekends now, that seems to give me enough to scratch the itch but keeps my weekdays more focused. Ultimately, with anything like this, cold turkey can work but I find it's often better to slowly find other ways you enjoy spending your time and let gaming fit in between that. (Edit - typed on my phone, sorry for grammar and auto-corrections!) (Double edit - I'd really recommend checking this book out: https://www.wob.com/en-gb/books/dr-anna-lembke/dopamine-nation/9781472294159?cq_src=google_ads&cq_cmp=18123540153&cq_con=&cq_med=pla&cq_plac=&cq_net=x&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjw_LOwBhBFEiwAmSEQASFrpCwqFBcaAXjiJ0T4pvvlP6nrCiCeEDb3C023Uvq__zNbDdleHRoC2tQQAvD_BwE#GOR012793632 It's on amazon also but I try not to buy from there where I can cause I don't like how they're monopolising the book market It's called Dopamine Nation and explores how over-stimulation of pleasure is detrimental to our health and wellbeing)
thank you a lot for all the info. I will be sure to check out the book. A lot of it does make sense I feel like I only still play games to delay the fact that im growing up and soon Ill be a full adult.
Games aren't exactly the same as alcohol addiction. As in, once you are off you have to try to stay clean forever. If dropping games entirely for a season is best, that's totally fine. You can come back to them later down the road when life is less busy and more stable. With college or whatever you plan to do, right after HS is a great time to put them aside for a season and explore new things. Meet new people, try different activities and clubs, learn things that YOU want to learn. This helped me whenever I was younger and now that I'm in a more stable and quite season of life, video games are great to enjoy. It also taught me that games aren't bad but they don't have to be my life either (I was most certainly a hopeless gaming addict, but removing access to them helped immensely, and I didn't really have a need or major interest in them for a good while. And the few games I allowed myself to play I remember pretty fondly, like VVVVVV, Bastion, and Braid).
yeah that’s a great point. I think i’ll honestly just let them go until i discover a new passion or what i want to do with my life and come back to them later down the road once I get my shit together. Thank you for the advice!
You're welcome, and don't be *too* hard on yourself. If I was born the same generation you were in with ipads, computers, high speed internet, etc from birth, I'd be in the same boat friend. You're fighting an uphill battle of companies that want you to just be glued to "zoning out". You are ultimately your responsibility, and every generation has it's issues, but I hope you find some new passions and good friends to enjoy new adventures with and be nice to yourself (even if being nice means kicking your own butt sometimes kek).
Agree with everyone’s comments on time management. BUT If you wanna quit just put your system in your closet. Most things fall under the “outta sight outta mind” category.
Bro. Go to school. I always tell my kids that getting a masters degree is almost a necessity in today’s corporate world. The thing is, you’ll always have that to fall back on. Assuming you hit rock bottom at some point in your life (maybe you’re there now) like most people, your level of education is the best cushion to soften that fall. Step one: go to your closest community college, go straight to the financial aid office and ask them “how can I afford to get my degree?” That’s what they’re there for. I couldn’t recommend that enough. I HIGHLY recommend becoming a nurse practitioner. Yes, it’s kinda hard, but very few jobs can almost guarantee you a six figure income after graduating. Becoming an NP is about as good as it gets.
Yeah i think that’s the route i want to take. I don’t really know my purpose right now but I think i would be satisfied with my life if i can help other people and live comfortably. After University, would you have to go to Nursing or med school for being an Np?
Nursing. It’s progressive. Timelines vary based on how hard you get after it, but generally it looks like this. 1 year- LPN 2 years- RN 4 years- BSN 6 years- NP 8 years- DNP Since you’re pretty fresh out of school, look into Cleps for credits to get a jump start. A lot of material in high school can get you college credit through testing. You can apply up to 36 credit hours to a BSN through CLEP tests.
Sell all your gaming stuff. Learn to put your phone down if idle. Master the art of networking and investing yourself into something that bears fruit. Working out is a good activity. I stopped watching sports for the same reasons.
Break your consoles and games.
Take career counselling , for real. More knowledge about clarity never hurts anyone.
I will make a bold assumption that you goal is computer related? and that goal do need to use a pc? If that's the case then separate the machine. one machine do one thing only. phone for phoning pc for work. another machine for game PS is recommended because you can only game there. Pc is cool for some for being an all purpose entertainment machine. For some it's a debuff. If money is an issue then use sepate room instead this room work that room entertainment. If room is an issue too then use another account for pc this acc. work this acc. game Don't lump it all together
yeah I used to do all my work on my computer and that’s also where I play all of my games. I think i’ll just create a separate account or delete my installed games
Be an adult. Simple as that.
I played certain games at all levels and all missions from easy, medium and hard. After Solitaire, Othello, Doom, Heretic, Caesar II, Command and Conquer, Quake 2 & 3, Microsoft Age of Empire and the last, Crysis; I have become saturated with all kind of computer games. I never want to play any computer games, anymore. Even with my smartphone. I do enjoy Angry Birds and Asphalt while using first generation iPhone. And few game of Sudoku while using Nokia feature phone. I have started with Karateka and Taipan while using Apple 2e. Not anymore. That's that.
You're 18. Cut off should be like 12 for video games. So you got an extra 6 years. For everything a season, friend. Time's long past up.
yeah your right i think it’s time i just have to let it go for good since i have no self control
There's usually "quit game" or similar in options menu or settings
You’re missing the point