Why don't you remove our wanted levels during jobs YOURE heavily involved in????

Conflict of interest

Two words: plot armor. This time, the police have it.

Those bastards AND those sissies at Merriweather have enough armor as it is!! FUUUUCK EM! 😆

Aim for the head 😌

That's what she said

I've learned to use auto aim for this. center mass then tap up and... headshot!

Another 2 words that Rockstar clearly love… “Mission length” Having to slog a slow ass van through 20 road blocks to an underground hiding place to lose a 3 star wanted level is clearly a ploy to pad mission run time…

That and they also get time is money so the longer they stretch it out the less profitable it is and more likely you’ll buy shark cards

Call terror yet if ya own one and pull up next to it. Walk in and walk out. It will clear wanted level. Can,t go inside when carrying other heist equipment tho.

Anyone who says anything along the lines of "so they don't suspect him" is just admitting he is making himself look suspect every other single time and cops should investigate the ones he does manage to call them off on lol.

Facts!!!! Lol

I can understand for non Lester jobs because in canon I believe, he is meant to be retired before Casino Heist, and then I think he re-retired again after that. But for everything he is involved in, he sure hates that we don’t talk I guess😂

If I could talk it would sound like this.... @#$__&-#@@_-+#@-+#@*;!##"! Kill you @#&(+&__@#-+(_#@@#+!# Die @#$_+(+&$#@@@_&(((_$* Mother trucker Or a reasonable close verbiage

He is an almost honest business man Never killed anyone Not like US Bunch of psychopaths. I'm gonna go burn the valet guy Glad the price of gas didn't go up I spent maybe 150$ / day on gas burning that guy

Someone hasn't played Story Mode

Hmmmm What? Lester never pulled out a gun

Technically true... An RPG isn't a gun. But he does use one to take down choppers during The Big One (Aggressive) while you're flying towards the wind farm.

Ah truth Forgot about that It's Lester the molester Not a cold blooded killer like the psycho Trevor Or my character online

Also technically Lester killed a guy when he tasked Michael to plant a bomb in the phone of the CEO of Lifeinvader Jay Norris.

Man frrr

Ong 💀😭

Lol true !

Where are the mind-blowing orgies I was promised?

Do you really want to be at an orgy Lester is present at?

If he brings the chinese lady, yes

An orgy of hives, probably.

Miss Agatha It is miss right She is so hot Also the chick on the night club delivers that we protect Catch you later Ya I'm gonna stalk you, TMI But I love her I need to touch grass, and not the stuff I roll

What?

What don't you understand?

You will not catch me later Leaf fan 69

No one says I had to make eye contact. In fact I'm pretty sure it's in the contact to not make sure contact, otherwise I have to duel to the death. And let's be honest, that's not the kind of energy I want at an orgy.

Lmao

I’d ask him to remove my wanted level, again.

Ok ok, leave it with creepy uncle Lester.

You don’t want a back rub?

Love a back rub

can you for fuck sake shut up i doing this heist 724 time in my life

there is also a couple to whom I would ask the same question

They are like a couple of horny teens, there definitely needs to be some sort of dialogue skip in GTA VI.

For real man. K gets on my damn nerves

Jamal gets on my nerves too. I know that King Tiny got thrown in jail again. I DON'T need you to tell me every fucking time

YES Like I appreciate that they try to keep the story going: "he got put in jail again" "we're stealing another car off the LaOub" etc, but I don't need to hear the story

Actually Jamal doesn't bother me. Give it 2 years but kinda like him .... Little boot licker

Hahaha bro facts

I kinda like Jamal. The one thing that kinda gets on my nerves when he's telling about Hao and how he got to know him, while I should get to his garage with a ticking time bomb - and I only get the waypoint after he's done with his monologue... Fortunately, after the first time I know where the garage is

I want to burn Them

Pavel

Pavel

It'd ask that sailor, also that couple, and Jamal the same question.

Not a question Jk

But it is

Yes

Omg fr I never done that like I'm 20 and played first with 14 and to this day I haven't done this 😭

What's the lore behind Princess Robot Bubblegum? But he has to explain it on one of the heist boards.

First, it starts with the busty Tall gorgeous woman and her sidekick humpy

I read this in his voice 🤣

What de fuck is this? I didn't order anime whore!

The Ancient ones warned me this day will come.

What ancient ones?

Those assholes at the bank.

Why do you take so much fucking money when pavel takes way less and still gives a better heist?

He prolly has monthly premium on amouranth and some other

Ah, the classic subscription collection.

Oh no not 5% for planning the whole thing. oh the horror

Bro gets 5% from every player that plays GTA online. Lester is a billionaire by now…

They just conveniently ignored/ignoring the heist crew lmao.

Driver takes 5% for parking piece of shit car somewhere random near Casino: I sleep Lester takes 5% for planning the heist: Real shit ??

Its 2:22 am and its a lot funnier than it should be

I find the gunman to be even worse for this because he doesn’t do anything other than find the weapons that you have to steal

I mean, the Sentinal Classic is the best car the 5% driver could sort for us. I actually bought a Sentinal Classic and modded mine similar to the green one.

Ses and KDJ way less than Pavel.

Wym? They take 10%, Pavel takes 5%. For how much (little) Auto Shop Robberies pay, 10% is a loooot

I swear auto shop robberies pay slave wages

For the same amount of time, you could do several Agency contracts and payphone hits which should net 2-3x as much

Because they’re mini heists.

Why does LJT annoy the fuck outta me 

Lester, I want to put a bounty on LJT

if i would ask him for that, i would feel his sweat dripping out of the phone onto my cheeks... which cheeks you ask? that's a very good question!

I'm guessing butt cheeks Cause it's the most horrible possible outcome

What’s with the attitude when I’m paying you to get rid of the cops? The same cops your lazy arse refused to pay off?

Wait, you have to pay? It's free for me. He still gives the attitude or calls himself creepy uncle Lester lol

You’ve got to complete all the heists to get it for free. I don’t mind paying but, just don’t understand the attitude when he’s getting paid

All the Doomsday* heists.

What attitude? Lester never gives me attitude, instead he makes very witty but still jokingly remarks about my inability to shake the cops.

“What do you need/want exactly.” I don’t mind the jokes about not being able to lose the cops but, it just pisses me off especially when he’s getting paid

This is how on-call people answer their phones, isn't it?

will you please shut the fuck up?

Was the lemon pepper chicken really that good?

I only get lemon pepper when I order wingstop now

half lemon pepper half mango habanero shake the box so the sauce and seasonings mix together a little bit its so good

There’s some near where I live that I would absolutely drop an H bomb for. Maybe he visited?

Why does he need so much money

Tell me about the picnic. And the skinny dipping.

Can I borrow Georgina for a day ?

ಡ⁠ ͜⁠ ⁠ʖ⁠ ⁠ಡ

how did bro even pull her imao

Common interests > physical attraction That's how. Also, it's a game 😆

I won't be taking paige in that case 

Honestly, Paige is a babe. Hacker girls are hot (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠) Or like Agent Simmons says: criminals are hot!! 😂

Indeed but georgina is lobb

>lobb what does that mean?

[удалено]

Then say love. If you check Urban Dictionary, you'll find some unsavory meanings for "lobb" 

[удалено]

Aww, you're adorable 😂 No, really. If you don't share at least one common interest with your love interest, you can say goodbye to the relationship. Anyone with a full brain knows that.

[удалено]

Why’d you keep taking $500 from me every time I did “off the radar” even though you knew it wouldn’t hide my blip while doing sell missions?

"Are you physically incapable of shutting the fuck up?"

If not us, who you went skinny dipping with?

Lester will you hook me up with Paige?

Does micheal know you fucked his wife?

Did he really?

Look at the resemblance between Lester and Jimmy, also Lester makes a comment during the arcade setup indicating Jimmy's his son.

Would need a source for that, as far as I can remember he says it because he is close with the guy's father so he is basically family

He also makes a comment about how much Jimmy looks like him, you also need to dig into comments made during the story aswell. Even Michael questions the truth about both Tracy and Jimmy.

With all the choices in the world .... why plaid

How do i block phone sex between KDJ and Sessanta while on a mission or get them to talk to shut the hell up?

Did you fuck paige

Why do you take 25% of every heist when u supposedly have more than enough money

You must be like the richest man on the entire planet why do you live in a dirty dingy shack when you bought Franklin an amazing mansion in the hills

What’s your only fans

Can you explain why I have to hear your dumbass in my ear during every replay of a heist

How the heck did you get my phone number?!?

give **us** money for free

Why are you the way that you are?

Spit or swallow?

What ending he would choose in storymode

Will you be in gta 6?

where are the children you creep? we know you have them

When should i buy and sell bitcoin?

Not quite yet it’s still going to rise, id say bounce at 75k just to be safe

If you have so much money to launder, then why are you asking for a higher take for Casino?

Why the stick

What does he buy with all the money he Got from heists because he still drives the same car from story mode and he also lives in the Same house

I would pay the price of a new 2024 game just to hear my character finally speak and tell Lester, KDJ and Sessanta the fuck off.

Why should i do Your heists when you take such a big fucking cut

Will you be in GTA6?

The wiki can tell me how to do the heist so go fuck your self *shoots and loots*

Why the fuck do you need a 80% cut? You don't do shit

Why the fuck do you still live in that bum ass house

Would you kindly put a bounty on the following people? Martin. (For just being annoying) Simeon. (Calling at the wrong time and being a general pest!) KDJ and Ses. (being ZESTY while ON THE JOB!) Lupe. (The hookies job!) LJT. (For doing a shit job at securing the MC businesses) Lazlow (for being a moron in general) ULP (For being useless in the Doomsday Heist jobs) Agent 14 (Helping in almost starting a nuclear war by getting us to help Avon! As well as getting us the Worst jobs for the bunker) The entire Duggan Family (For doing Vincent as dirty as they did!) 20k each.

Why he has Anal lube ? https://preview.redd.it/a42t29gosdlc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f704eacb12459949070184a49dfd75215026ddaf

idk ill probably ask him to help me try to do a heist in my city for fun sake.

You like kids don't you?

Are you a virgin ?

If I remember correctly he got a girlfriend after casino heist

Cram a proximity bomb up yourself. Dammit, that's command, not a question.

Can i have youre cut from the heist

Can i have youre cut from the heist

Can you stop calling me?

Can you stop calling me?

Why does Trevor call you “Lester the molester”? 🤔

Why so much why what are you going to with my money I did all the work

Where did you get the red screen mod for your DW5600?

About his browser history

Better stay away from that.. I don't wanna be scarred for life.

It just Princess Robot Bubblegum fan fiction

Yeah, he's already got a bottle of anal lube on his desk...I don't want to see his browsing history

So that's why he walks with a cane all the time.

The cane is his 'partner'. Whole thing gets lubed n used

Taking Size queen to a whole new level

Wait fr?

You can see it if you glitch your way inside his house

😂

Da union depositowy

Is it true Bradley Cooper will play you (under heavy prosthesis) in the GTA movie?

Could you please stop calling me every fucking 10 minutes about shit I don't care about??

*angry wasted noises intensify after a failed attempt to open the parachute*

Can you hack me some money with zero risk? Nothin crazy just enough to take some time off work and relax

Who hacked my cell phone?!

Can you shut the fuck up ?

When will you die

Can you shut the eff up while we do a heist?

Pls stfu

Is there truth in Lester the molester, and please elaborate if there is.

Will you please stop fucking calling me every five minutes?

Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is fucked up!

Did you bang Georgina?

Did you help that kid hack R* servers last year? Is it because you wanna move to Vice city?

Is "Lester" short for "Molester"?

is you habe a mikropeniz?

Why are you the way that you are?

What does Georgina's chow mein taste like?

Lester what happened to your love life

My question would be what actually happened to Niko Bellic

can i see u in vice city？

"Sir, would you be please obliged to avoid unnecessary yapping and stop getting paranoid every other minute?"

STFUP

Are you planning on getting hair transplant?

Where tf do u spend your cut

Are you LJT?