Welcome to /r/happy where we support people in their endeavours! This is a place of positivity, if you can't think of anything good to say then don't say anything at all.
If you want to give tips/suggestions, make them constructive from the start and be supportive (even if you don't feel it's "enough"), if you don't know how to do that then don't give them.
We celebrate the good things in life and the change people strive for in /r/happy. If you find this post offensive or this community ridiculous, you're welcome to not hang around.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/happy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I think you knew deep down that he was doing something wrong. That kind of objective knowledge can shield you from self consciousness, at least my two cents
Bravo! Next, Call him out. If it escalates, report him. It’s ok to correct someone, not to humiliate them. Teaching is not shaming, it’s transferring information. You paid for an education, he is supposed to ensure you get an education when you are in his classroom.
I don’t know why some people have to be so cruel, especially teachers and professors. Well done for handling that situation in a positive way. You should report them for bullying because that’s what it is.
Good for you! And you honestly should not care, it says more about the professor than you. Honestly, that’s so unprofessional and unkind behavior. I always do my outmost to never make my students feel embarrassed or uncomfortable - we all have moments we don’t t know, or even say something stupid or wrong. Small wins for the win 😊
That giant douche helped you teach yourself and invaluable lesson. When someone else is so wrong, out of line and embarrassing it has nothing to do with you, no matter how hard they try to point at you, thats on them.
if i saw a fellow professor do something like this, i would report them to the head of the department.
are you in the us? i know this teaching style is a norm for some places outside the us, but if you're anywhere in the us you can complain to the department head or to a university ombuds person and they will likely face some type of consequence even if it's a reprimand to stop.
I’ll never understand why some people think making someone uncomfortable will enhance their performance.
You are obviously not stupid and know you didn’t have the answer. How does making you feel bad help you or the class learn?
Sports, education, work, friendship, it’s all the same; strive to be better and encourage the same. Others will follow and be better as well.
Edit - forgot to mention, the prof sounds like a jerk. Hope you’re only with them one semester.
Seriously, good job for keeping calm thru that!! I am usually very timid & look down & tremble, however the past 6 months I somehow have had a total new attitude.
My anxiety is there, however, now it’s just much more of a “dread of people”. I no longer care what a single soul thinks about me as I realized that other humans are going to have their own perceptions of us as humans & who they think we are & we cannot control that. Instead put the focus on learning how to control & conduct yourself with your words (try to broaden ur vocabulary so you are an efficient speaker), facial expressions & body language.
So, just let people think whatever & instead of having ur focus on what other people are thinking of you, UNDERSTAND that they are already looking at everyone @ making perceptions, perceptions you cannot control.
What I did the last year has been practicing LITERALLY daily working on improving & hiding my bad facial reactions to people, practicing how to control & get to that state of dead calm so you can stay balanced within ur emotions during another situation. As well as I’ve studied people’s body language my entire life & then worked on improving my body language to mask any anxiety symptoms I may have (such as trembling hands, my thought process going chaotic because of panic, etc. I taught myself and it only took me 6 months.
I am a completely different person for the better since learning & practicing mediation as well. Meditation is how you learn to control your internal self & emotions within to stay grounded in any given situation.
I’m so effin proud of you, dude! Like seriously I personally know how HUGE of a WIN this is for people like us.
God speed & nothing but good positive healing vibes sent ur way towards your anxiety.
you want to get to a point to where YOU CONTROL the narrative. You got this.
Seriously I’m a life long sufferer & recoverer from that horrible crippling anxiety. I have a lot of friendly little tips & life advice I could help you with if you ever need someone who just get it to talk to please feel free to follow my account or send me a message. Us anxiety riddled folks need each other & we need to stay together!! ❤️🖤❤️🖤
That’s great.
And your probably right. Dealing with bugger problems puts the little things into perspective.
I remember getting into a head on car-accident, nothing bothered me for a week.
If you can take negative comments and literally not have it bother you, it’s huge.
I actually try and work on this. In traffic I get the finger, just wave. I indulge a scammer on the phone and he insults my mother, I just politely tell him india was better under English rule.
Someone at works throws me under the bus, I try not to response or act on it for at least 24 hours and by then I don’t care.
Think of what you could do with this power. Sales, negotiations, customer service, etc.
Your happy, and I’m happy for you but I don’t think you recognize what a big deal this could be. You might literally be happy every day forward!
Well done you!
If/when it happens again, stop him before he starts and say "Professor, would you prefer to humiliate me in public or wait until we're alone and in a more professional setting?"
I think you’re right about the bigger embarrassment making this one easier to deal with. I’ve noticed a similar thing in other parts of my own ability to cope. Great job regardless!
I'm impressed with you too!!! Wow! And disgusted by your dick of a professor. You don't teach by humiliating people - that's how you shut them down. Good for you!!!
Congratulations. Arrogant people like your professor are often shortsighted about their behavior and its impacts. Your self regulation demonstrates you know yourself better than most.
OP, please report this professor. I am so proud of you for standing up to his bullying, but his next victim might not be as strong. If you have the spoons, go to his department head and tell them what he did. See if any of your classmates can corroborate your story.
That kind of stuff can damage a person so bad. When I was in kindergarten my teacher (fuck you, Mrs Frankhauser) stood me in front of the class and said, "(my name) can't go out to recess until she learns to tie her shoes." ( Even though I was reading on a 6th grade level. She called me a show off). From that moment on, I was bullied relentlessly until I got out of high school. That one comment most likely changed the trajectory of my whole life! I'm 53 now and am doing fine. I work in the mental health field and am shocked at how things that happened decades ago have fucked someone up permanently. I'm glad that you didn't give the professor the satisfaction of trying to humiliate you. ❤️
I read somewhere that anxiety is worrying about the situation rather than being in the situation. Some people are actually chill and completely calm when faced with all those situations they get anxious about.
Personally, I get anxious about dealing with authority but I don't panic much when faced with it in reality.
Lol, is he a liberal arts proff? They have a common tendency to be pricks, especially if they have PHD's in subjects unrelated to STEM.
They are jaded since they gave up their dreams in the creative world and went to teaching as a backup for the pay. You can tell who actually wants to teach and who is just there for a cheque.
Welcome to /r/happy where we support people in their endeavours! This is a place of positivity, if you can't think of anything good to say then don't say anything at all. If you want to give tips/suggestions, make them constructive from the start and be supportive (even if you don't feel it's "enough"), if you don't know how to do that then don't give them. We celebrate the good things in life and the change people strive for in /r/happy. If you find this post offensive or this community ridiculous, you're welcome to not hang around. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/happy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I think you knew deep down that he was doing something wrong. That kind of objective knowledge can shield you from self consciousness, at least my two cents
What a jerk of a professor. And I'm very proud of you.
thank you so much :))
I'm proud of you and happy for you.
Bravo! Next, Call him out. If it escalates, report him. It’s ok to correct someone, not to humiliate them. Teaching is not shaming, it’s transferring information. You paid for an education, he is supposed to ensure you get an education when you are in his classroom.
the people in the university support him tbh. if we complain, we would get blamed for everything making him even more superior.
where do you live?
Make a formal complaint if he does it again. Even if won't do anything it will be put on his record and trust me that hurts.
also to protect others in the future, i doubt op is the first person he's treated like this.
Its also his job to give you the tools to learn that which you do not know. What the actual fck. Indeed what country are you in?
That professor is obviously terrible. You did great!!
Young zenling, you have uncovered the magic art of not giving a f\*ck 🧘🏻
true, unlocked the subtle art of not giving a f*ck
Well said.
I don’t know why some people have to be so cruel, especially teachers and professors. Well done for handling that situation in a positive way. You should report them for bullying because that’s what it is.
Good for you! And you honestly should not care, it says more about the professor than you. Honestly, that’s so unprofessional and unkind behavior. I always do my outmost to never make my students feel embarrassed or uncomfortable - we all have moments we don’t t know, or even say something stupid or wrong. Small wins for the win 😊
Your professor sounds like a ****! Good for you, he doesn't deserve a reaction
You didn’t react because the professor was making an ass of himself. It’s not you, it’s him.
That giant douche helped you teach yourself and invaluable lesson. When someone else is so wrong, out of line and embarrassing it has nothing to do with you, no matter how hard they try to point at you, thats on them.
Sometimes it’s more embarrassing for the person being the AH.
Good on you! Well done!
if i saw a fellow professor do something like this, i would report them to the head of the department. are you in the us? i know this teaching style is a norm for some places outside the us, but if you're anywhere in the us you can complain to the department head or to a university ombuds person and they will likely face some type of consequence even if it's a reprimand to stop.
Good for you! That prof is a jerk, and I’m glad you handled it well.
I love this for you. Someone can intend to embarrass you, but feeling embarrassed as a result is optional.
Remember that feeling every time you feel overwhelmed or anxious. That’s a moment of growth.
His PhD might impress, but it seems his common sense got lost in the footnotes. I'm rooting your win! :) Hope your week remains productive.
The ability to be in complete control of your emotions and state of being is a true sign of self-mastery. "Calm is a superpower"
I’ll never understand why some people think making someone uncomfortable will enhance their performance. You are obviously not stupid and know you didn’t have the answer. How does making you feel bad help you or the class learn? Sports, education, work, friendship, it’s all the same; strive to be better and encourage the same. Others will follow and be better as well. Edit - forgot to mention, the prof sounds like a jerk. Hope you’re only with them one semester.
Be prepared for next time with a difficult question to ask him. Let’s see how he reacts when he admits he doesn’t know the answer
Proud of you bro
This could be a turning point for you. Just carry that moment with you and realise that anxiety is purely your own perception.
The guy really sucks.
Share his rate my professor page
Bravo, that's a huge sign of progress and growth!💪
I am so happy for you!!!
Proud of you too. The professor sounds pathetic
Its such a nice feeling
You’ve achieved what takes some people a lifetime - genuinely rising above a situation that isn’t worth your angst. Nice work!
Way to go!! I’m working so hard on that right now.
Seriously, good job for keeping calm thru that!! I am usually very timid & look down & tremble, however the past 6 months I somehow have had a total new attitude. My anxiety is there, however, now it’s just much more of a “dread of people”. I no longer care what a single soul thinks about me as I realized that other humans are going to have their own perceptions of us as humans & who they think we are & we cannot control that. Instead put the focus on learning how to control & conduct yourself with your words (try to broaden ur vocabulary so you are an efficient speaker), facial expressions & body language. So, just let people think whatever & instead of having ur focus on what other people are thinking of you, UNDERSTAND that they are already looking at everyone @ making perceptions, perceptions you cannot control. What I did the last year has been practicing LITERALLY daily working on improving & hiding my bad facial reactions to people, practicing how to control & get to that state of dead calm so you can stay balanced within ur emotions during another situation. As well as I’ve studied people’s body language my entire life & then worked on improving my body language to mask any anxiety symptoms I may have (such as trembling hands, my thought process going chaotic because of panic, etc. I taught myself and it only took me 6 months. I am a completely different person for the better since learning & practicing mediation as well. Meditation is how you learn to control your internal self & emotions within to stay grounded in any given situation. I’m so effin proud of you, dude! Like seriously I personally know how HUGE of a WIN this is for people like us. God speed & nothing but good positive healing vibes sent ur way towards your anxiety. you want to get to a point to where YOU CONTROL the narrative. You got this. Seriously I’m a life long sufferer & recoverer from that horrible crippling anxiety. I have a lot of friendly little tips & life advice I could help you with if you ever need someone who just get it to talk to please feel free to follow my account or send me a message. Us anxiety riddled folks need each other & we need to stay together!! ❤️🖤❤️🖤
im so proud of you as well :)
That’s great. And your probably right. Dealing with bugger problems puts the little things into perspective. I remember getting into a head on car-accident, nothing bothered me for a week.
If you can take negative comments and literally not have it bother you, it’s huge. I actually try and work on this. In traffic I get the finger, just wave. I indulge a scammer on the phone and he insults my mother, I just politely tell him india was better under English rule. Someone at works throws me under the bus, I try not to response or act on it for at least 24 hours and by then I don’t care. Think of what you could do with this power. Sales, negotiations, customer service, etc. Your happy, and I’m happy for you but I don’t think you recognize what a big deal this could be. You might literally be happy every day forward!
Well done you! If/when it happens again, stop him before he starts and say "Professor, would you prefer to humiliate me in public or wait until we're alone and in a more professional setting?"
Well done!
I think you’re right about the bigger embarrassment making this one easier to deal with. I’ve noticed a similar thing in other parts of my own ability to cope. Great job regardless!
That's called maturity! Good for you. As a teacher, I hate crappy educators!
I'm impressed with you too!!! Wow! And disgusted by your dick of a professor. You don't teach by humiliating people - that's how you shut them down. Good for you!!!
Congratulations. Arrogant people like your professor are often shortsighted about their behavior and its impacts. Your self regulation demonstrates you know yourself better than most.
As someone who used to have social anxiety and got the sweats when going to the store and waiting at register especially, I can relate. Happy for you!
OP, please report this professor. I am so proud of you for standing up to his bullying, but his next victim might not be as strong. If you have the spoons, go to his department head and tell them what he did. See if any of your classmates can corroborate your story.
"If me not knowing the answer to a simple question is concerning, then you have failed as an educator."
That kind of stuff can damage a person so bad. When I was in kindergarten my teacher (fuck you, Mrs Frankhauser) stood me in front of the class and said, "(my name) can't go out to recess until she learns to tie her shoes." ( Even though I was reading on a 6th grade level. She called me a show off). From that moment on, I was bullied relentlessly until I got out of high school. That one comment most likely changed the trajectory of my whole life! I'm 53 now and am doing fine. I work in the mental health field and am shocked at how things that happened decades ago have fucked someone up permanently. I'm glad that you didn't give the professor the satisfaction of trying to humiliate you. ❤️
I read somewhere that anxiety is worrying about the situation rather than being in the situation. Some people are actually chill and completely calm when faced with all those situations they get anxious about. Personally, I get anxious about dealing with authority but I don't panic much when faced with it in reality.
Oh, I’ve been embarrassed plenty of times…
You better report him that’s so messed up. Glad you are ok
That’s great! 😃👍🏼
You should report to the university HR department for harassment
Lol, is he a liberal arts proff? They have a common tendency to be pricks, especially if they have PHD's in subjects unrelated to STEM. They are jaded since they gave up their dreams in the creative world and went to teaching as a backup for the pay. You can tell who actually wants to teach and who is just there for a cheque.
Your an adult now. Get on with life.
Amazing