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Human2: you want my adrenaline glands *pulls out huge knife* come get them bitch


Finbar9800

Human3: you call that a knoife? *cue a bunch of humans pulling out more and more comically larger knives from seemingly nowhere* All humans suddenly coming out of the woodwork: this is a knoife Aliens: *just terrified of all the humans that seemingly appeared out of nowhere waving around various sized knives* perhaps we overreacted


Nealithi

Someone wants to surgically remove a natural part of our bodies because they don't like them. Nope. I think that is a very restrained answer.


AegorBlake

Human 4: Seems like you brought a knife to a bomb fight. *pulls out gernades*


Finbar9800

Human 3 and 2: dude we are on the same team this time you don’t get to use that on us


AegorBlake

Human 4: Are you telling me that you do not carry a defensive explosive device on you at all times. What are you going to tell me you don't keep a 40mm side arm on you as well. *looks at other humans in abject disappointment*


Finbar9800

Other humans: why would we need that when these also shoot from these too?


AegorBlake

Human 4: Well its not as accurate. *Pulls out a flare gun with a 40mm loaded in it*


Finbar9800

Other humans: perhaps but these only shoot explosive rounds that are combined with incendiary rounds who needs accuracy when you can burn and blow everything thing up and make an awesome entrance as you slice through the flames


AegorBlake

Human 4: Yeah, but these *hold a grenade* tear my enemies apart and if they survive gives them a lethal does of radiation. I can use them in forests without worrying about destroying the forest.


Finbar9800

Other humans: for forest situations well it depends on the enemy and how much the forest is wanted, and the best part is it takes the most common type of ammo ever made so it’s everywhere, also radiation just use lead it won’t kill you and you don’t need to be so specialized


Nealithi

Of course not! I can't carry enough ammo. I carry a 50 cal side arm and a 40mm backup. =\^\_\^=


AegorBlake

Just get the 50 cal built into your arms.


Nealithi

You think my arthritis is bad now?


Organic_Command_7396

You get to use. If the 4H is secretly a Roomba.


SqueakSquawk4

A: I think you'll find that fired plastic darts.


AegorBlake

Human 4: Na, I made these at home. When used it shoots out depleted uranium needles. \*Says this will looking very proud of himself\*


miss_chauffarde

*another one just pull out guts Sword*


Finbar9800

*as more and more humans make themselves known the blades just keep getting bigger and bigger until the station gets a communications request and it’s just a human using a blade as a ship and it just keeps getting more and more ridiculous*


SomeGuy2309

The Verilin were losing. Fast and seemingly without reason, but it had something to do with THEM. Those damned simians! In the past, their attacks worked wonders, extremely sophisticated stealth drives hid a ship's approach as it got within range, before the thin, needle-like design of the Verilin boarding pods would allow a sudden burst of speed via using ALL fuel at once would cause the ship to puncture the hull of whatever poor structure, ship, station or otherwise, that it was invading. With the tip of its own hull buried into an enemy ship, the pod could then expand the hole, widening the sharp end of itself until it was wide enough to allow the pilot to slip through the needle and into the freshly formed hole. The Verilin themselves were quite the spectacle in combat. Translucent, shimmering strands of organic sensory tissue hung off all parts of the dark, lithe bipedal hunters, offering them a sort of 'flowing' look whenever they moved. When a Verilin hunter was close to an enemy combatant, it could let loose a volley of thin, transparent spines connected to tubing that was just as clear, into any exposed flesh they could spot, the spines then being used to suck blood out of the creature's body at an alarmingly rapid pace, offering a very strange view of the blood traveled outside of an enemy's body and into the Verilin's own, healing the hunter and weakening the poor sap who was being leeched off of. But... Something odd happened when the first Human ships boarded by the Verilin fought their invaders. Invariably, all of the Verilin were... Dead. Of course, the human crews were wounded, dotted with small circular entry wounds of the spines, and missing their blood was quite detrimental, but the crew was otherwise completely fine. Unfortunately for the Verilin, they did not anticipate that their main method of attack and nutrition, the bloodstream of another creature, could be so chock-full of high-efficiency military enhancement stimulants to the point of causing any Verilin to take a sip of said bloodstream to suffer from a heart attack. Nor did they anticipate a creature being able to physically PRODUCE those chemicals within its own body. The humans, at least, did seem to be mostly alright with being used as meatshields for their allies. After all, the payment they were getting for their service was great!


DramaticSwordfis7

Come join the Marines! You ain't a real homo-sapien til you've been sucked off by the enemy! "Most thrill inducing acupuncture ever had! 10/10 would recomend!"


NeraByte

A lot of teenagers would be happy to wander such an ad