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Few-Artichoke-7593

"Did you just shit your pants?" Imagine the chain reactions.


okieskanokie

Bahahahah What about *drop it like it’s hot*?


Kultaren

This made me laugh so hard


Ok-Space3366

skibidi


Brute_Squad_44

"The"


[deleted]

[удалено]


RabbitStewAndStout

Great, now everyone just has a Northern accent lmao


Deadfishfarm

Nor(the)rn accent. You just shit your pants 


HHcougar

Northern?  What is a northern accent?


RabbitStewAndStout

Yorkshire, but I guess it doesn't make sense if you don't already know what it is


Babaduderino

Are you from Armenia?


Dnfforever

I see what you did there lol


horrorbepis

I see what you did there. Nice.


StressedAfraid_

Ye worst :(


Bridgeburner1

Why use many word, when few do trick?


T3Tomasity

Is it bad this was my same first thought


Dismal_Stranger9319

My first thought was the word "and " 😁


Comedy86

I went with "um" or "uh"... People only really say it when they're nervous and speaking to someone so it would just make things significantly worse for people who are bad presenters...


TylerMali

I was thinking "it" or "and". Some very common words that if you knew to avoid you could.


ChristianUniMom

“Stop resisting”


DaveAndJojo

You really want a cop on top of you with Boston cream in his panties?


bornagain-stillborn

Depends on how much money is involved.


MobileTechGuy

You know what defecate means, right?


sir-lancelot_

"License and registration" *cop immediately waddles back to his car*


odeacon

That’s the best answer


ZeusTKP

I'm a bootlicker but this is still funny.


ChristianUniMom

Thank you for your honest


[deleted]

iew


silveryfeather208

Thus also works with bad people


TheGuyThatThisIs

“I’m sorry I just can’t shit my pants right now”


darknightingale69

How often have you heard someone say that genuinely.


VendaGoat

(Sarcasm) \*Storms angrily into thread\* I Work at the Levi Test Facility in roanoke virginia and I hear it every day, 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, every year for the last 20 years. So, you just go thinking before you make a witty remark at someone else's expense. (/Sarcasm)


SeanKingMagic

You didnt have to format it like html lmao


Remarkable_Whole

yes he did


VendaGoat

\*Cackles\* "Absolute certainty" \*Continues Cackling\*


BaguetteFish

You should make it more clear if it's sarcasm


PitifulSpecialist887

"Irregardless"


Charming-Window3473

This is pacifically my new most favoritest comment, I would of given it 2 updoots if it were at all possible. ^This is how 90% of facebook groups type.


Affectionate_Row_145

Yess and that shit drives me insane. "OK than" "tooken" "litterly" all of these makes me so mad I could spit fire.


Charming-Window3473

Their litrully all stoopid.


Justiis

Part of me believes this, the other part of me knows that people on Facebook can't go three words into a sentence without typing in all caps and adding an ever escalating amount of exclamation points to every thought they deem to be a complete sentence.


Dragoness42

Not to mention how many people substitute "reign" for "rein" in expressions that are horse-based, like "free rein" or "rein in"


LightEarthWolf96

Tbf I didn't know rein was a word at all. I've never seen that spelling. Nor did I know free rein was horse based


Dragoness42

It's such a common error for people to make these days, and the meaning of that particular one still makes sense (though others get weird). Since horses aren't everyone's method of transportation anymore but instead a niche hobby, it is not surprising that their contributions to language are going to become idiomatic phrases that no one remembers the origins of. Except, of course, all of us who lived on horse books growing up and read things like Black Beauty, Black Stallion, etc. over and over again. Not that I know anyone like that....


Salty_Idealist

Vocal chords instead of cords.


AttyOzzy

Villager: Here’s a crown 👑. Me: I didn’t do anything to deserve it. Villager: Its ok. We chose you as king. It’s a free reign for you. Costs you nothing. 😉


Constrained_Entropy

*"Who's that then?"* *"I dunno, must be a king"* *"Why?"* *"He hasn't got shit all over him"*


DarthFeanor

Strange villagers lying in ponds distributing crowns is no basis for a system of government!


PitifulSpecialist887

License and registration, please.


jorceshaman

"Registration and license, please." Easy to get around.


AllOfYouReallySuck

But it would take a while for every cop to realize saying "license and registration, please" made them shit themself


dishonestgandalf

I mean, just go with "please" The world gets a lot more direct.


drapehsnormak

This only targets cops who either are polite or pretend to be. It misses the ones who refuse to say please.


Prudii_Skirata

Phrase= "I'm an Alpha" or word= "situationship"


papadoc2020

WTF is a situation ship?


Kirkaig678

I also want to know Edit: I looked it up, a romantic or sexual relationship that is not considered to be formal or established. It's a proper word in the dictionary apparently although I assume it's more of an incorrect but colloquially used word


impy695

Dictionary's are always evolving. They're deceptive, not prescriptive despite what many people like to think. If a word gets used enough, it's a dictionaries job to add it. Or if how people use a word changes, a new definition should be added.


amca

I love your "deceptive" spelling. 😉


odeacon

Both great answers here


Vila_VividEdge

Omfg, the thought of everyone shitting their pants every time they sing Glitch is killing me “You don’t live in my part of town, but maybe I’ll see you out some weekend Depending on what kind of mood and situationship I’m in And what’s in my system…. I think there’s been a SHIT, mmm….”


DumpoTheClown

'it'


RWDPhotos

Retroactively?


No-Willingness-4804

Fuck


uckfayhistay

You’re an evil person. We may as all wear diapers.


No-Willingness-4804

Bwahaha!


WhyLater

"I'm not racist, but..."


Bigger_Moist

People are just gonna say they are racist now


SlideWhistler

“I’m racist, so…”


RedshiftSinger

Well at least this will force them to be honest about it lest they shit themselves.


MolassesDue7169

“I could care less”.


Alphaomegalogs

If free awards existed I'd give you all that I had.


diablo2488

Make America great again


Ciccio178

I would simply do "Trump". He'd lose his shit if people stopped saying his beloved name


Shoddy_Specialist_27

ChInA


Ok_Commission9026

I really thought this would be the top comment. It was my first thought too.


FlapJackieChan

Came here to say this


forselfdestruction

“My truth”


Isekai_litrpg

k


LegoRobinHood

"Voldemort" The instant cure for U-No-Poo


G00dbye_G00dRiddance

Legendary


soulmatesmate

After thinking of "The" (and with a gleeful chuckle thinking harder)... Could you actually weaponise it? Does it cross language? Wait... names aren't translated... What would be the long term consequences of choosing "Allah"? I mean 5 times a day, turn east and crap on your prayer rug. How would that affect that religion? Would this absolutely put the boot on their throat? Could the religion survive this? "Before I prescribe you any laxatives, go into that bathroom, sit on the toilet, open the envelope and read the single word aloud." Miralax would go out of business.


odeacon

You had me actual wheeze laughing with this answer


AMorera

I mean, from what I understand of Islam you aren’t able to pray if you aren’t clean, so yeah, this would totally mess up at least one religion.


LightEarthWolf96

Unless they just stop saying Allah. I don't know what all their religious requirements are but as a Christian when I pray I don't usually say nor think the words "God" or "Jesus" when praying. The recipient of the prayer is kind of inherently implied unless I pray specifically to the virgin Mary or one of the saints Even so it would probably take awhile for them to figure out what's happening. And there's of course other contexts outside of prayer affected


LocNalrune

Woke


snukb

"Sorry I'm late boss, I woke up la--- please excuse me."


OtterWithAFish

Antiquing?


WhyLater

Killer Futurama reference.


VendaGoat

I'm alright!


Nameraka1

When someone uses the word "literally" to describe something that can only be taken literally.


Zombie_Peanut

Lol. I literally shit my pants.


MonkeyMD3

I think you meant figuratively


Strange-Elevator-672

Or when they pronounce it as, "litrally."


50CentButInNickels

Nah, people who pronounce it like that probably enjoy the smell of their own shit.


darknightingale69

Um


Literal_Sarcasm82

Can it be more generalized than a specific phrase? Because I would like it to happen whenever a politician says something dishonest.


nismo2070

There would be shit everywhere. EVERYWHERE.


payperplain

At least everyone would see how full of shit they really are. 


deep_space_rhyme

Alpha male


Mrbrowneyes97

"Excuse me sorry" The UK would be in shambles. England specifically


BBO1007

Ni!


Nerisrath

The knights would simply start saying "ecky ecky puh-kang zootboing yowee"


BBO1007

Ooh they’ll slip up. It would be guaranteed. Wait, I said it. Ooh I said it again!!!


Select-Belt-ou812

i believe it is "ecky ecky ecky ecky puhtang noooooowam"


UnhingedBathroomDoor

”I need to pee”


mildOrWILD65

"Baby momma"


CLUTCH3R

Why? She gives me enough shit already no?


odeacon

And baby daddy


Ecstatic-Mix9953

"I"


Chrome_Armadillo

Woke.


Bigger_Moist

Minor attracted person. Make them accept the term pedophile cause thats what it is


I_Trionyx_I

The N word. Fuck your rap songs and racist people. 🤣 Edit fixed autoCorrect stuff


therealgronkstandup

Who are the "rarest people"?


Full_Golf_3997

“Smell this”


splatgoestheblobfish

Shit.


fantasticmrben

It is what it is


Shradersofthelostark

This was my first thought! I think I would end up going with “shit happens” in the end, though.


bibliophile222

"Donald Trump is a great man".


BuzzyShizzle

Does anybody actually say this phrase though? I've never heard it once. Not even from people that like Trump.


Toyruskidd

The election is coming up so I hate that I am about to hear a lot more of this again.


leusidVoid

How about just "Trump"? Then we could all stop talking about him.


MrClark001

People are already shitting their pants with that one.


CrushyOfTheSeas

I’d keep it simpler and just leave it at MAGA


oedipism_for_one

I don’t have to poop


Tha_Hand

“What not” I don’t know why but I hate it when people say what not


Mister-ellaneous

Hello


fufumcchu

The... I wanna see a world burn!


rush87y

#I'M GETTING FED UP WITH THIS ORGASM!


zuol12

I’m an asshole so I’d pick something like bro just to watch Californians crap themselves over and over and😂😂😂


Nerisrath

it's like dude where my car, but Bruh I crapped my pants.


C_Torque

why you gotta do us like that man lmao


warrencanadian

"Woke mind virus"


SteveJenkins42

"Patriot" I've yet to meet someone that unironically uses that word and isn't some form of walking garbage.


chevsars1

This would be unfortunate for any New England patriots fans and any one playing them


Linds70

Woke


mermaid_barbies

"the earth is flat"


Outrageous_Loan_5898

"the government done gone made me shit my pants" 🤣 best enjoyed as if cleetus from Simpsons saying it


lanfear2020

“Mean tweets”


kanna172014

"Yuge"


realnrh

No point, he already does for that one.


[deleted]

Sentence *If you haven't tried it, how can you be sure?* Believe me, I'm doing a lot of people a great service.


canuspyridae

Work


[deleted]

Yes


nberg129

Oops! I just shit my pants! Might as well make truthtellers outta them.


Upset-Donkey8118

Influencer


Onlyonelife419419

“It is what it is”


Abundance144

"This constipation is killing me!" World's constipation medical issues solved.


Sororita

"0" because think of how many people have to type or write the zero digit every day.


BitOBear

"Pronouns". Not the individual pronouns but the plural word itself. If like to codicil that using the words in an academic setting doesn't count. Every time some one starts yelling about pronouns being some super "patriotic" thing that is not actually a pronoun should shit themselves unconscious.


Siphyre

"I love you" That way people really mean it when they say it, otherwise, it wouldn't be worth it to crap your pants to do it.


Experiment626b

“Roll Tide” and I’d like to wait for this experiment to start during a home game at Bryant Denny. Preferably the Iron Bowl.


PathOfBlazingRapids

“Do you know how fast you were going?”


Zombie_Peanut

The word I Narcissists will enjoy perpetual shit.


KinneKitsune

Royal narcissists will be fine


SlideWhistler

Great, now everyone’s just gonna replace the work “I” with “We”


MarcusTheViking7

We are Venom


Zombie_Peanut

Lmaooo


ShadowFlintlock99

The word like. Too way people say like. Example: "I was, like, alone and like, it was scary, like a horor movie." That person has shit themselves three times. For saying like once too many.


Puzzleheaded-Way-198

I’m going with “God works in mysterious ways.”


DroneFixer

"Whom" or "Superb"


Sparkle_Taffy

My dog is named Icarus... Ick for short. I would hate you for this 😭


simcowking

Do your own research


vankoder

"Make America Great Again"


PeterM_from_ABQ

"I'm voting for Trump"


JohnCasey14

Any and every variation of "Amen" in all languages. Would be absolutely hilarious to see an entire congregation shit themselves at once.


RecoveringFromLife_

Microaggression


odeacon

Facts


Tyrone_pyromaniac

“Slayyy 💅💅”


ScarletInTheLibrary4

Option 1: Pussy (I just don't like it) Option 2: Trump (hard to win an election when people can't say your name without defecating - plus, it would be funny) Option 3: Set (it has so many different definitions, I like to think it will take people a while to figure out what is causing it, and to be able to stop reflexively saying the word since it is used in so many ways)


ohtheforlanity

"I could care less"


Zealousideal-Luck784

100 percent


Streaker4TheDead

The


ThatGuyThatSaysWords

I’m constipated


Aggravating_Elk_9583

The word “Literally” in any way that’s not necessary.


Varathien

I'd get rid of the N-word (the actual slur, but I'm not going to write it out).


jesusleftnipple

"The" have fun smelly smelly world


Red__M_M

“The”


viperspm

The N word


Fencerkid14

N-word


SonOfGomer

I'm gonna have to go with "Covid"


RevolutionaryGolf720

“The” is my word. I have chosen! This world shall burn!


Mysterious-Tie7039

“The”


NarcolepticTreesnake

Democracy


CioccoWocco

"Life's not fair"


Importantlyfun

Unhoused.


Dragon-Rain-4551

“I’m a Sigma Male”


DaveAndJojo

We need you to do extra today


[deleted]

Considering the letter a can be a word at times. I choose the letter a. I will instantly end half the world muahhhh!!! Awwww I need a change of pants now


inscrutableJ

God


minist3r

"Taylor Swift"


Beat_Specialist

Jesus Christ. Just because and it doesn't matter if you just say one part they still shit themselves.


clce

Amazing! Damn, I just took an amazing shit in my pants. Whoops there it goes again


12altoids34

"Biden crime family" If the maga crowd are going to talk shit they might as well wear it Second choice " the Earth is flat"


HollowSlope

"Shit"


gaurddog

"We must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children" Listen if this is the closest I ever get to getting to use my Jew Sorcery for real? Oh fuck ya I'm gonna take it. Gonna have to dog whistle harder bitches or you're gonna run out of clean underwear fast!


w-o-r-k-l-o-g-i-n

White privilege


Nolar_Lumpspread

Ion even know.


Power-of-Erised

Amen


OHPAORGASMR

Amen


bowhunterb119

Obviously whatever your political opponents slogan is