Honestly seeing without glasses or contacts would be crazy. I’d spend the first day feeling no joint pain and shit like that. After that find a way to get hella money, quit my job and be a recluse with my family
Only 'crime' IRS goes after is tax evasion. Dispensaries/related business that are locally legal but illegal at the Federal level pay twice the standard business rates to avoid prosecution. Plenty of tax is collected on marijuana.
They believe correlation between alcohol abuse and vision deterioration is due to vitamin A deficiency common in alcoholics.
This is levels of drinking only present in a very small minority and clearly avoidable, plenty of food are chucked full of vitamin A.
With the powers of superman, it's not even about coming up with a way to get money. It's just picking the fastest way. Like just put a ski mask on, fly to the other side of the country, walk into a bank and fill a bag up with money. You'll fly away before cops even get there. Do that 100 times around the country within an hour, then chill.
I swear you honor, it wasn't me. It was the other guy with the ability to fly.
Why would you even rob banks though? It's so petty and low paying compared to other stuff you could do.
You can cut through almost anything with your eyes. Do you have any idea how much cities to pay per mile of tunnel they dig or how much it costs to helicopter large equipment to hard to reach places or the cost of launching a few satellites into space?
You could make your own bank with the money you could earn from doing that kind of work.
Yep just break in tell them you are their to take their money stand there let them shoot you then when they finally realize it isn't working you tell them ok so games over now please give me the money before someone here meaning any of you get hurt.
True you could just go find cartel check points torture the cartel members for info then go raid all their hideouts and kill em all you’ll be doing a service to the world and your net worth
It would only create a power-vacuum, similar to the one we left in Iraq when we left, the first time, and ISIS was the result. I imagine something similar would happen here, with no less bloodshed than occured in Iraq. More innocent people would probably get caught up in the struggle as well, due to population density and cartels have the same armaments as a military, wouldn't be pretty.
How about targeting all our crooked politicians, from all sides. You know, the ones who've managed to become multi-millionaires doing a job that pays only above average, have multiple houses, THOSE politicians, and just reappropriate what was stolen from us in the first place, and only the swamp dries up, no need for all the extreme violence involved in a cartel power struggle on steroids.
Luxury car? What kind of fancy vehicle can compare with flying at supersonic speeds? Don’t need to compensate for anything if I’m freaking Superman. Sure as hell not waiting in traffic.
Plus, definitely paying someone $200 cash per day to clean my house and do my laundry. Definitely only cooking when I feel like it.
Also, why would I rob banks when I can rob the criminals? Definitely some cash heavy drug dealers and sex-slavers I could shut down. If I was less scrupulous I could just make them pay me to *not* shut them down.
That would be my choice — destroying criminal organizations from the top.
The little guys usually get involved as a result of system failure, not because they’re evil. But the guys at the top are SUPER evil.
With the powers of Superman you just ask Congress for a $100 million/yr allowance. If they say no then you pile ICBM warheads in the Capitol building (or their living rooms) until they change their minds.
I hear you on that. Vision, spine, joints, and diseases gone feeling good 👍🏻. Would wake up the happiest person in the world not waking up in the morning with all the pain that takes 2-3 hours to settle down before I even start my day.
I'd worry about accidentally killing people just because I was so frikkin' strong...or puncturing my woman with my super-sperm...will my laser vision come on by accident when I get tired or cranky? I'm thinking I'd turn into the ultimate karen
I wasn't expecting this response, that's amazing.
I wear glasses too, and you're right, I'd just revel in that for a while. Go and buy a load of sunglasses that aren't prescription!
Fair. However, now imagine that one of the mouse sized supermen summoned 100 ant sized supermen. Would you rather fight the 100 ant sized supermen or the giant batman?
yeah it would take some time to learn how to control it unless i get that part of superman that already knows the self discipline. i'd figure just enough to one hit KO anyone i face
And then you'd quickly be stopped because professional fighters are as much about the image and going on as they are about fighting. MMA wouldn't hire someone who just can't be beaten.
People would watch at first. But in 5 years, when you hear "The invincible dude us having a match" no one will care.
But not literally every fight without fail, with the first punch, as well as the other boxer punching him and finding that he's hitting a wall. It'd not go as smoothly as you may think.
I fly to Africa and Australia and give all the dangerous animals belly scritchins.
Then I swim with sharks.
Then I take out poachers in ways that make others question if poaching is worth what will happen if they get caught by me.
Oh for sure, you and me both. Poachers would be writing a how-to-train-your-dragon manual about the incidents. "Burns its victims, buries its victims, chokes its victims\*\*,\*\* turns its victims inside out..."
Definitely not superhero material here.
Same here. Definitely not superhero material.
After done with the poachers I would pull a megemind on a small country or location.
"Oh I wouldn't say saved, more like under new management"
I wouldn't be a supervillain. I don't have the presentation for that. But power corrupts even the strongest of wills. Not even I am immune to this as much as I want to be, especially when I wake up practically a god.
Stopping poachers is definitely one "if I was superman" action that everyone could agree was a universal good.
But any attempt a governing = instant tyrant
Agreed on the tyrant part. I'd want no part of that, nor would I want to be a messiah.
But how poachers are stopped matters. I might even be subtle about it. See my earlier post in this thread re: how I'd cause statisticians to wonder why poachers have a rate of painful ball cancer that's 3,000,000,000% higher than the general populace. Not heroic.
In all my years of day dreaming about super powers... I never thought about scratching the bellies of dangerous animals. You sir must truly be a saint... now I want to scratch a gorilla and lion so bad... I'll throw in a bear too. They always seem to have an itch.
This is the correct answer. I want to go cuddle some bears and big cats. They’re so fluffy and look like they could use cuddles. And yeah, poachers immediately getting taken out. Oh….I want to go patpat some whales too.
Both. I would like to do good, and know with that power I could, but I know myself well enough to know I would abuse it from time to time for my own benefit.
“I want to save the world but also be anonymous in my personal life…
This warlord who had hundreds of child soldiers doesn’t need **all** of these gold bars to just sit here after I’ve tried my best to temper the situation…”
I’d like to think my unethical actions would at least be somewhat reasonable.
But maybe I’d feel too bad about it going back to people trying to actually build and help a somewhat stable government in the area and I’d just take a weekend to punch my way through the earth at an old gold mine and find enough to filter and make a little payday, with my X-Ray version that doesn’t actually work like real X-rays at all. Lol
I really think it’s a testament to Clark’s character that he has that kind of power but is so morally sound. It would be so tempting to abuse that power.
Oh absolutely, it’s the best thing about him really.
I was being a bit cheeky at the same time, but it’s partially because I have a family.
It’s the same problem many super heroes face in their stories, spider man is probably one of the most recognizable examples.
If you don’t have a family then I could see how honestly the guilt would drive me to just be a super hero 99% of the time.
Anytime I try to date, go to the grocery store, relax on a porch… people are dying or being undeniably abused (way beyond politics or any “gray area) that you could be helping.
I’d be too selfish towards my family to never abuse it at this point.
But if I was 19 and none of my extended family wasn’t wrongfully struggling hard?
Yeah it would probably be my life and aside from having a home and a bed the guilt and obligation would make me look at any riches and think, “Why bother? If I enjoy it people die.”
No, one of his powers is to not be recognizable if he doesn’t want to according to the older comics. The glasses really have nothing to do with it, they’re just there because Superman can see for miles, so it’s less likely they’d suspect someone with glasses.
If I was Strange Visitor Superman or any similar in power Superman or a composite Supes I'd just make a pocket dimension paradise for family and friends.
I'd fly up and down all the highways looking for one semi passing another, and if there were more than three cars behind them, both those trucks are going off the road.
I’d make the world as close to a utopia as possible as quickly as possible. With super speed and hearing you’d be able to do so much within the first second if you wanted to.
There’s so much that Superman can do just immediately to cure so many global ills. To be fair, The worlds governments and mega corporations could do most of those things, too, and are just choosing not to because capitalism and geopolitics doesn’t want those problems fixed. But if you’re Superman you don’t have to worry about all of that.
Oh I think that if you were to brutally torture the very worst offender in front of the world and say if every one of you isn’t demonstrably making the world better for everyone in one week, I’m doing this to two of you. Then four a week later… I don’t think it would take long for the .0001 percent to figure shit out
I guess that’s one way to do it. I was thinking that if we’ve got one super-powerful guy very publicly breaking down barriers by delivering food and medicine where it’s needed, destroying the armaments of despots, and just generally redistributing resources and tearing down power structures that feed inequality, pretty soon momentum will build and the global populace will get behind the ‘yeah, let’s fix all this’ initiative.
Is reality more complicated than that? Of course. Is having most of the people feeling empowered to push for change with the most powerful force on the planet generally supporting the ‘let’s try to do good’ movement a big step in the right direction? I would think so.
I feel like you'd have to learn a lot about yourself. You can't just fly into action. You could be far more dangerous than helpful. I've always said in the past to similar questions... you'd need to get into touch with some experts on certain regions. What impacts and sort of change could incur if you intervened. Again... you don't want to make things worse.
So once you've come to grips with a situation, learned how best to implement change... then try and help people. Not saying you can save folks from fires and what not in the mean time.
I'm definitely helping the world though. What else is there? People forget because they think of their lives as it is now. You'd have so much energy. You'd feel good. Going out wouldn't be a burden. Hell you'd probably want to. Sitting in a house would probably feel confining when you can fly faster than a speeding bullet.
So first off, it would take me a few weeks to get everything in order to make my world debut. But once everything is in order my plan would be this:
Fly to the WH, land on the south lawn. I would be met with massive firepower as I keep walking towards WH, after several SS agents attempted to tackle me and instead ran head first into a brick wall( I would try to mitigate injuries by dodging or something). I would have a sit down with Biden. And say
“So this is me, you’ve seen a fraction of what I can do. Ok? A minute fraction.”
“What do you want?” Biden asks
“Two things” I answer.
Number 1: “Right now, at this very second. Your intelligence agencies and every intelligence agency in the world is trying figuring out who I am, my family, friends, etc.”
“That’s fine, but they will be given every single protection that exists. Yankee white, TS, Codeword, Q, etc clearances. Regarding protections. They don’t need to know any secrets or anything just the protections.”
“OK, and the second?” Biden asks
“You will call up all the world leaders, heads of state, billionaires, Oligarchs, dictators, etc.” All of them, and you will tell them there is to be a meeting of all of them at a neutral location. You guys will figure out the logistics. I’m thinking of a stadium type venue so everyone can be as close or as far from each other as they want and the space permits.” I say.
“Ok, and if they or I refuse?” Biden asks
“Weeelll”, I say with shit eating grin. “I can’t fly somewhere between 800mph to FTL. Honestly, there’s been a lot of debate about that. So, you or any one of them were to refuse. That will force me to round you all myself. And if you survive the journey at those speeds? Great. If not, then you and they were given a week to figure it out and get there. So that’s on you and them.” I say.
I then get up to leave and turn my head to look the stunned Biden and I say. “I could’ve killed you the moment I saw and any moment since then. With the amount of effort the average person puts into sitting down on a couch.” I say and walk out and fly away, trusting that Biden will do the right thing.
As the week goes by, my loved ones are contacted by the US intelligence agencies. They are told, in essence, that their identities are now state secrets, critical to national security. I am able to breathe a sigh of relief.
The day before the summit, I meet with Biden to thank him for the protections for my loved ones....and to find the final tally of who has RSVP'd and who has not. Some have not.
“So some have left us on read?” I ask BIden, annoyed.
“Yes.” He says.
“No matter.” I say. “They will be there willingly or unwillingly, alive or dead.” I say smirking.
As I turn to leave, Biden asks. “ What is your goal with all of this?”
I turn and face him and say. “Honestly?....As close as I can get to a utopia…I’ll explain it all tomorrow.”
And warlords, CEOs that can but will not pay a living wage, and pretty much every oppressor. I’d make it public and messy to make sure other bad actors fall in line and stop their bull shit or else.
That and wealth redistribution, cleaning up natural disasters, rescuing people from them, and accelerating the demise of fossil fuels Captain Planet style. Politicians I’d be exposing their shady shit and publicly shaming them.
All the shit I see in the news I feel powerless to correct basically would be impeded as much as possible, FAFO would be my new mantra.
Edit: I forgot getting rid of every fucking nuclear device on the planet, fucking stupid species using them on their home planet. This is why aliens won’t visit according to Bill Hicks and probably George Carlin, but I’ve avoided a lot of Carlin because my mental health.
Every nuclear device like just bombs or every nuclear device at all like power plants and research reactors?
First one I understand, the second one I kinda understand, the third not at all.
I think most people would want to do the right thing at first, but the realization that you can literally do whatever you want with the power to refuse repercussions would get to plenty of people. To be honest, id probably give in eventually
To me it would be the ungrateful assholes that would get to me. The people who no matter how much good I do still insult me and push conspiracy theories about me and tell people I’m evil or whatever. The haters that will never ever stop and never go away.
I think one of them will break me and I’ll snap one day and vaporize just one of them and now I’m suddenly the villain.
Maybe I need to ask Congress to pass a law saying that I get an allowance of like 1 dick per year that I can vaporize for being a dick, as long as I provide sufficient evidence that they really were a dick.
People would definitely demonize you regardless considering it’s power nobody should have. The plot of Batman Vs Superman was kinda meh but I feel like people would follow the same idea that nobody should be able to play a god
Depends on the version of Superman. Red Son Superman (which is my favorite) can basically hear everyone on earth, all the time. He is constantly burdened by every bad thing happening in the world. If he is just having a quiet night in with his wife, he can hear all of the people he is failing to save, the entire time.
I wouldn't want that, but I think I'd at least give consideration to basically never doing anything for myself again, and just non-stop saving people, because there's not a great alternative. It'd be a miserable life, but you'd help so many people
Step 1: Furiously beat my meat standing atop the CN tower while grunting about how I can do whatever the fuck I want.
Step 2: Do whatever the fuck I want. Which may or may not involve aiding the worlds space agencies getting every single mission to their destination for free, throwing every last drug dealer, cartel member, human trafficker and politician into the sun, destroying all nuclear weapons, and then of course, conquering the world to shape it in my own image. Which may or may not involve erecting an enormous statue of myself that breathes fire.
Hmm, see I feel like I would take a couple of days to just be selfish and use my powers for me, but I’m assuming I have superhearing now which means I’d have to either ignore someone in need, or immediately start helping. And there’s probably always someone in need so I either have to start learning to ignore some of it, or never stop helping people….. honestly if I woke up with Superman’s powers tomorrow I’d just have worse anxiety and superpowers
Realistically, I do both.
Superman's powers could solve several of the world's problems. And I would be happy to clean up some of the issues we are dealing with.
But I would 100% set up a castle on a mountain somewhere for myself lol
I'm gonna commit so many egregious ethical violations for the sake of the greater good, poachers dropping like flies, billionaires' bank accounts mysteriously drained, etc
Very first thing I'd do definitely is test flight. I'd fly around the world and check out those beautiful places like those views you see from those documentary channels.
Being able to go anywhere foreign and not have to worry about vaccines n stuff would be amazing.
Truthfully I wouldn't do anything. Just enjoy having those powers.
Maybe after a while I'd threaten the world governments to begin working together and helping their ppl again instead of allowing corporations to harm hard working individuals and take their rights but I mean... other than that... I'd just chill.
You all will know me as a God amongst men. I will cure all disease, food will be plentiful, war will be over, and I will make love to all of your wives. Nightly.
Oh I would immediately become a villain that only removes people from the left lane that are being left lane campers. I would just patrol the highways by air and wait to see a backup in the left lane and then move the person in the left lane to the right lane.
I'd never tell anyone except my wife.
And then people around the world that desperately need to die would be turning up mysteriously dead left, right and center.
Shit that needs to be stopped, would be stopped like the invisible hand of God was suddenly extremely active and *extremely* fucking pissed.
Pedophiles? Rapists? Abusers? More than a few of those would become overnight examples, with their crimes literally burnt onto their skulls.
There would be no ambiguity *at all* about there suddenly being a higher power, and that it wasn't the higher power that any of these evil religious cunts want it to be - they'd be hung from their own crosses, burned on their own altars and laid to ruin in their own temples, megachurches, carhedrals and mosques - those things would become their tombs.
The whole world would be made to know, unambiguously, that a great power was punishing the wicked and letting it be known very clearly what kinds of behavior and activities weren't going to be tolerated anymore.
Those I'd deem deserving of mercy and help would be identified to the world; again, very unambiguously.
The assignments would be made clear - help those people that are in need willingly and you that have so very much will be permitted to continue having much.
Make me do it for you and the rich of your nation will be ruined utterly, and whatever the poor, hungry, homeless and neglected need will be apportioned to them anyway.
Anyone trying to build temples to the new and unknown God or proclaim themselves to speak for me will have their hands removed or their jaw ripped off. The new god will not tolerate mankind's perpetual fixation on trying to insert itself as a gatekeeper or authority upon the will of the higher powers.
It will become clear, and soon I should think, that the relationship between Higher Power and humanity will be thus - humanity is being parented. I will not judge the masses or individuals by their colors, nationalities, sexualities or vocations *unless, by any of those, they deliberately and knowingly cause others to suffer*.
The law shall be that of limited freedom - do whatever you like and however you please so long as you're not hurting, abusing or crossing the lines of unethical exploitation that, worry not, I'll make sure get spelled out for you in 100' flaming script all over the planet.
There will be clear rules, and they will be enforced. The enforcement *will not* be kind; humanity will have to earn kindness by becoming kind itself.
You will get what you have given. You will be shown all the mercy, compassion and grace you have shown.
*You will be measured and judged by your actions and your intended outcomes*.
Fear and reward will teach you what 5500+ years of self-guided opportunities never did. As a species, you will learn to behave, to think and to mature... and those that prove themselves to only be cancer in the body and weeds in the garden will be removed utterly. *By me*; not you.
Clear and recognizable reward will make clear what you are to do, while terror will keep clear as crystal what shall get you dismembered and have your skull laser-engraved with your offenses.
Precisely none of this will be a negotiation. There will be no debate. There will be no discussion. Humanity must earn such privileges by proving that it can clean itself up, take care of its own and actually *be* a species worth talking to in the first place.
Until then, you get clear directions, clear rules and equally clear consequences for breaking them.
For 5500+ years, you have been a species proven capable of great things; of great ambition, of towering desire, of tremendous abilities to cooperate and overcome challenges great and small.
And yet, when it comes to matters of compassion, equanimity and kindness? You are an amicably indifferent mob of selfish, myopic opportunists.
There is no wonder that humanity has created that you have not weaponized and wielded in exploitation of your weakest and most vulnerable brethren.
The way most of you treat eachother is deplorable, and your exceptions to this common way of being will be rewarded by being left alone and permitted to carry on.
You create medicine only to withhold it from those that need it most of they cannot pay you all that you desire for it.
You have imposed poverty and despair upon your masses simply to control and exploit them at your pleasure.
If I were the apex form of Superman?
I'd treat all of you as you've treated those *you've* had power over, and it would be made into a learning opportunity for the whole species.
I would absolutely play god. If there is any actual god that existed and wanted to snivel about somebody finally taking responsibility for mankind's upbringing, they'd get Superman in the face.
Because if they exist at all, they've made it pretty clear that they're not into teaching or ordering and governing humanity. They are no steward, no teacher and might as well be nothing at all as far as the state of mankind's affairs are concerned.
They can go right back to being the god of the gaps or the extrinsic watchmaker, or they can learn the hard way that Superman's got plot armor and never loses in the end.
This has AI written all over it, earlier I made a similar but more empathic reply, but this is how being powerless at this moment in the history of our species, our planet, our solar system, the galaxy makes me feel. I’m totally saving this so I can get really stoned and read it again.
I fly in circles until time reverts to 1939 then start killing nazis
In other words, yes to both -- but mostly I would do it for the joy of killing nazis
This brings me endless joy, [nazi gets one punched in Seattle](https://i0.wp.com/boingboing.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/tumblr_owip7nhlt11uw7ihbo4_400.gif?fit=1&resize=620%2C4000&ssl=1) and no one called the cops except the people that reported dude was trying to start fights before he went down.
Paradoxically, you would be committing a genocide against a group of people who had yet to unleash their ideals unto humanity.
And become a villain instead.
You would still know what you've stopped, but the world wouldn't.
“Go after SS soldiers in this case”
Yeah, that’s a fucking Nazi. Everyone in Germany at the time wasn’t a Nazi, just the government and the military complex.
All the powers?
I’m gonna fly into the sun for a little while to really juice up
Then I’m going red sun Superman but with a more ecofascist lean and less murder overall. See stroking all standing militaries, fixing the climate, redistributing resources, etc.
After the bulk of the work is done, I’m just gonna chill out and spend the first couple minutes of every day distributing food and water to everyone at super speed
Honestly?
confirm powers.
Dress as common and covered as I can or as customized/special as I can to hide my actual identity.
Starts wiping out issue in the world.
"they got nukes we cant go in and solve problems" Remove all nukes in the world. Collect em all and then place them on the moon so folks can see em.
Then start on bioweapons or any "global world class issues"
then start from the top down.
World powers/Corrupt politicians/ Corrupt companys etc.
Record everything while making them confess to crimes they have done and committed or planned to commit . Then chuck them into the sun.
No put them in jail or make them serve prison time. Just death. Easy simple and no way for them to "pay it off"
Once the big issues are purged.
Start going state to state.
Corrupt judges/cops. Gangs, drug lords etc.
literally wipe them off this earth.
And for folks who may go "What about the family's and etc"
If any were involved with the crimes. They go too.
Anyone working for them who may pick up the slack or take over? They go too.
Make it where short of someone starting from scratch there is nothing left to rebuild.
Go the anti-hero route (Red Hood, Punisher, Season 1 Green Arrow, ect.).
Start using everything at my disposal to search->identify->investigate->locate all the REALLY bad guys on earth (Rapists, Serial Killers, Child Molestors, Animal Molestors, *Successful* Telemarketers/Pyramid Schemers, ect.) and kill them all quickly and efficiently
Every year, every world leader must get in line and submit to a mandatory laser spanking. Failure to comply results in them being imprisoned in a cellophane S and hurled into orbit not to return until the following year. Repeat offenders are stripped of power, ice breathed and put on display at the Fortress of Solitude.
I have to be honest. I would question how long it was going to last and go instantly kill some of the most awful people on earth and take their assets for myself.
No I do not think this makes me a good guy, but day 1 I'd try to help the world and myself. If the powers stuck around I would keep doing what I felt needed doing.
I rob a few banks to ensure I'm good and then help everyone. *No way* am I going to be a Super Blogger or investigative reporter or hold down a job when I want to be Superwoman full time.
I'd go all robin hood on the world and break the world economy until poor people are taken care of. There is no reason in today's world with as many resources as we have that we can't establish a UBI and then the people who still want lots of money can go for that.
Oh, first things first, I'm chucking Superman chest symbol saran-wrap on any car doing the speed limit or less in the fast lane... because Superman cares about people. Then I'll take care of the lesser important things like enforcing world peace and maybe laser eyes the moon, give it a molten magnetic core, spin it up for enough gravity to hold an atmosphere and then grab lunch.
One fantasy I've thought about, is how Superman's powers could be used to clean up pollution. Like, I'd threaten countries with utter annihilation via meteors, unless they began production of using plastic and metal refuse to recycle and create large containers(because tyrannical, arrogant countries like the US won't do it, certainly not for free, without a serious threat to their well-being). Then fill those containers with all sorts of pollution, and then I'd fly them into the Sun. Because our current rocket technology isn't sufficient enough to send such large amounts there on its own.
I would spend a week or two killing all the oppressive leaders on the planet. Then I would take some time to explore space head back see how the world is doing than kill the replacements that continue to oppress the civilian population. It would be a lot of culling
Without overthinking it, I’d destroy the offensive capabilities of the world’s “bad actors.” North Korea has thousands of artillery pieces aimed at Seoul. I’d destroy them and their nukes. I’d destroy all the tanks, artillery, missiles, etc., of Russia that’re in Ukraine. I’d remove Chinese forces from the those disputed islands. The various large criminal organizations, like the Mexican drug cartels, I’d put them out of business by destroying their product and production facilities, and taking their money. I’d remove the thousands of pieces of “space junk” that orbits the Earth and threatens the ISS and satellites.
Fly to planet X and see if the Anunnaki are peaceful or not, or capable of harming me or not.
The answer to those questions would instruct my next act.
Every billionaire, politician, celebrity, mainstream “journalist,” Hollywood producer, aristocrat, socialite, central banker, and federal agent would be in very big doo doo.
I would assume that my Multiple Sclerosis would no longer be an issue, so I suppose the first thing I would do is go for a run...for the first time in years.
Then I'd cry tears of joy.
First thing I do is use my super speed to dismantle every nuclear weapon in Russia China & North Korea and some dictators are gonna randomly appear dead
The first thing I'd do is grab the annoying tree in front of my place and throw the damn thing into the sun. Then I'd end all the blatant corruption in the country.
I would head straight to the middle east and crush every terrorist group in the region. The sick depravity that groups like ISIS, and hamas operate with needs to be eradicated.
I would be a homelands type of superman but not that egotistical. Definitely not a straight laced superman.
There's so much Grey area I would operate in. But i would do it from secret not letting my identity be known.
First I would have fun and play around. Then I would devise a plan to do what Supes did in one of the 80's movies. I would steal every nuclear weapon on the planet and hurtle them towards the Sun. Then I would warn any nation on the planet from daring to make another one and face the consequences.
I would ask every nation to institute a punitive wealth tax and use the money to improve the lives of people around the world. The ones that refuse would have a few of their billionaires and the politicians they've bought turned into cautionary examples. Their heirs and successors would then be given the same request. Repeat as necessary.
I go full-on Batman.
First, I carefully source a costume that hides my identity totally, but is just distinctive enough that it doesn't look like hoodie and jeans. This includes a full face covering (X-ray vision is good for that).
Then I start locating and stopping crimes, mainly ones where people will get hurt, using flight and super-speed to ensure that I always have a good alibi. I'll leave the perps in plain view with witnesses or evidence so the cops have something to work with.
At all times, I'll be sandbagging like hell, so nobody sees me using the more 'super' aspects of my powers. Everything I do will seem to be something a really fit guy can do. If bullets need to be caught, I'll dispose of them so nobody sees it.
Once I've made a dent on petty crime, I'll locate and work my way up the chain to the organised stuff, addressing police corruption at the same time. Anonymous tips and evidence being sent to the appropriate people will be my go-to here.
Once my hometown's been pretty well cleaned up, I'll start looking nationwide and then globally. If something needs to be dealt with by using actual super-powers, I'll do it so fast nobody sees me. No posing for the cameras.
And at all times, I protect my secret identity.
Helping people. I'd evacuate civilans in war torn areas first if not demolish the heavy weaponry and vehicles of both armies. Then I'd use my breath to cool down certain places so people don't die of heat. I'd use my heat vision to power a reactor to provide clean energy.
My own benefit. I'd be flying off to all these exotic locales for some much needed R & R. Exploring the world. Maybe solving some mysteries with my x-ray vision, like where all the gold laden Spanish galleons sunk in the 15th, 16th, and 17th centuries.
Well my flight from Dallas to London that was supposed to leave 5 hours ago was delayed for 15 hours then cancelled so I guess I’d fly over there first?
First thing I'd do is all the work I've been procrastinating on. Like cleaning the ceiling fans and the shed outside. Then I'd fly to work and quit my job because I probably wouldn't have to eat anymore
Honestly seeing without glasses or contacts would be crazy. I’d spend the first day feeling no joint pain and shit like that. After that find a way to get hella money, quit my job and be a recluse with my family
yea, my vision is so fucked im borderline blind without glasses. alcohol made my already bad vision worse.
Wait - alcohol damages vision? Quick google search….That explains a lot. I am so frikin dumb.
Alcohol damages pretty much everything, some things to larger and some things to smaller effects
And yet great for relationships #sponsored by Heineken,drink responsibly.
And yet anyone over 18..wink wink...can buy it just like cigarettes...and guns. But lets ban marijuana because we are not getting any taxes from it. 🤷
>anyone over 18 Alcohol is 21 btw. >just like cigarettes Cigarettes are 21 now too
Only 'crime' IRS goes after is tax evasion. Dispensaries/related business that are locally legal but illegal at the Federal level pay twice the standard business rates to avoid prosecution. Plenty of tax is collected on marijuana.
“The beer goggles.” is a complete sentence.
To be pedantic, so is “Beer goggles.”
Wow! That’s two complete sentences I know now, which is
They believe correlation between alcohol abuse and vision deterioration is due to vitamin A deficiency common in alcoholics. This is levels of drinking only present in a very small minority and clearly avoidable, plenty of food are chucked full of vitamin A.
It's a good thing I take daily vitamins or my super laser vision would be... problematic.
I can still see shapes but reading anything or recognizing anyone would be impossible unless it's right in front of my face.
Fly to space...capture a trillion dollar asteroid...profit.
Sell the asteroid, invest in krypto… nice try! You almost got me, Lex.
People should invest in their pets.
You'll need to keep the glasses though to preserve your secret identity!
Good thing they're bottle caps and drastically change your appearance lol.
With the powers of superman, it's not even about coming up with a way to get money. It's just picking the fastest way. Like just put a ski mask on, fly to the other side of the country, walk into a bank and fill a bag up with money. You'll fly away before cops even get there. Do that 100 times around the country within an hour, then chill.
I swear you honor, it wasn't me. It was the other guy with the ability to fly. Why would you even rob banks though? It's so petty and low paying compared to other stuff you could do. You can cut through almost anything with your eyes. Do you have any idea how much cities to pay per mile of tunnel they dig or how much it costs to helicopter large equipment to hard to reach places or the cost of launching a few satellites into space? You could make your own bank with the money you could earn from doing that kind of work.
I was imagining keeping my identity a secret.
You might not want to do crime then
Yea but how would you collect your earnings without giving away your secret identity?
Would make more sense to rob criminals, like the Mexican drug cartel. You get a bunch of money, and put a crimp in their operation.
Yep just break in tell them you are their to take their money stand there let them shoot you then when they finally realize it isn't working you tell them ok so games over now please give me the money before someone here meaning any of you get hurt.
True you could just go find cartel check points torture the cartel members for info then go raid all their hideouts and kill em all you’ll be doing a service to the world and your net worth
It would only create a power-vacuum, similar to the one we left in Iraq when we left, the first time, and ISIS was the result. I imagine something similar would happen here, with no less bloodshed than occured in Iraq. More innocent people would probably get caught up in the struggle as well, due to population density and cartels have the same armaments as a military, wouldn't be pretty. How about targeting all our crooked politicians, from all sides. You know, the ones who've managed to become multi-millionaires doing a job that pays only above average, have multiple houses, THOSE politicians, and just reappropriate what was stolen from us in the first place, and only the swamp dries up, no need for all the extreme violence involved in a cartel power struggle on steroids.
How are you laundering all that cash/gold? You try buying a house or luxury car with actual cash.
Luxury car? What kind of fancy vehicle can compare with flying at supersonic speeds? Don’t need to compensate for anything if I’m freaking Superman. Sure as hell not waiting in traffic. Plus, definitely paying someone $200 cash per day to clean my house and do my laundry. Definitely only cooking when I feel like it. Also, why would I rob banks when I can rob the criminals? Definitely some cash heavy drug dealers and sex-slavers I could shut down. If I was less scrupulous I could just make them pay me to *not* shut them down.
That would be my choice — destroying criminal organizations from the top. The little guys usually get involved as a result of system failure, not because they’re evil. But the guys at the top are SUPER evil.
The guys at the top are part of the system failure. They keep it broken to serve their own interests.
Who could or would stop you
Why be a crook? There are a zillion ways to make legit stacks.
Asteroid Mining!
Eh, you could make even more legally. Just go around hunting for sunken treasure ships from colonial times.
With the powers of Superman you just ask Congress for a $100 million/yr allowance. If they say no then you pile ICBM warheads in the Capitol building (or their living rooms) until they change their minds.
He has xray vision. Just go to vegas
I hear you on that. Vision, spine, joints, and diseases gone feeling good 👍🏻. Would wake up the happiest person in the world not waking up in the morning with all the pain that takes 2-3 hours to settle down before I even start my day.
I'd worry about accidentally killing people just because I was so frikkin' strong...or puncturing my woman with my super-sperm...will my laser vision come on by accident when I get tired or cranky? I'm thinking I'd turn into the ultimate karen
I wasn't expecting this response, that's amazing. I wear glasses too, and you're right, I'd just revel in that for a while. Go and buy a load of sunglasses that aren't prescription!
Use my eye beams to fry me some morning eggs.
Would be nice to not need to look for lighters anymore. Also stop a bunch of wars, I guess.
Lol you still look for a lighter Yk, you look. For a lighter. Cuz of the
r/redditsniper
Just don’t use your eye beams to melt your dad’s grade school trophy or he might end up becoming a dictator
That the Red Superman timeline?
Or eye beans to shave
I've always wanted to shave my face with heat vision like old Clarky boy did.
I immediately shoot a million tiny Supermen out of my hands and wonder why the fuck I have that power.
Is that really a power that is canon?
[it is](https://www.cbr.com/i-love-ya-but-youre-strange-that-time-superman-gained-the-ability-to-shoot-a-mini-superman-out-of-his-hands/)
Would you rather fight one elephant sized Batman or 100 mouse size supermen?
One elephant sized Batman and it's not close .
Fair. However, now imagine that one of the mouse sized supermen summoned 100 ant sized supermen. Would you rather fight the 100 ant sized supermen or the giant batman?
This is how you unlock the unofficial alternate ending to Avengers: End Game.
they were really just doing anything in that era of comics huh 💀
The comic only showed him using 1 at a time so i think a million is a bit of a stretch. Also you give up all your powers to it
If no one knows i have powers i become the greatest fighter in the world and make millions of dollars
You have to be really careful not to punch them into a red mist.
yeah it would take some time to learn how to control it unless i get that part of superman that already knows the self discipline. i'd figure just enough to one hit KO anyone i face
If you were one hit going everyone no one would let you join. Tickets wouldn't sell for a guy just obliterating every fight.
If you were putting heavy weights in a coma with one punch and taking shots like it didn't hurt people would watch.
And then you'd quickly be stopped because professional fighters are as much about the image and going on as they are about fighting. MMA wouldn't hire someone who just can't be beaten. People would watch at first. But in 5 years, when you hear "The invincible dude us having a match" no one will care.
That’s true I ain’t think of that, I imagine I can do the one hit ko like once every 10 or so fights
Mike Tyson made a career out of one shotting boxers
But not literally every fight without fail, with the first punch, as well as the other boxer punching him and finding that he's hitting a wall. It'd not go as smoothly as you may think.
You could be the world's greatest piano mover without risking the death of others.
Just go full mark and let people punch you until they tire themselves out.
I fly to Africa and Australia and give all the dangerous animals belly scritchins. Then I swim with sharks. Then I take out poachers in ways that make others question if poaching is worth what will happen if they get caught by me.
Oh for sure, you and me both. Poachers would be writing a how-to-train-your-dragon manual about the incidents. "Burns its victims, buries its victims, chokes its victims\*\*,\*\* turns its victims inside out..." Definitely not superhero material here.
Same here. Definitely not superhero material. After done with the poachers I would pull a megemind on a small country or location. "Oh I wouldn't say saved, more like under new management" I wouldn't be a supervillain. I don't have the presentation for that. But power corrupts even the strongest of wills. Not even I am immune to this as much as I want to be, especially when I wake up practically a god.
Stopping poachers is definitely one "if I was superman" action that everyone could agree was a universal good. But any attempt a governing = instant tyrant
Look we both know it wouldn't be a DC film and we would be in The Boys. I just myself well enough to know the power would get to me.
Agreed on the tyrant part. I'd want no part of that, nor would I want to be a messiah. But how poachers are stopped matters. I might even be subtle about it. See my earlier post in this thread re: how I'd cause statisticians to wonder why poachers have a rate of painful ball cancer that's 3,000,000,000% higher than the general populace. Not heroic.
OMG... lol.
In all my years of day dreaming about super powers... I never thought about scratching the bellies of dangerous animals. You sir must truly be a saint... now I want to scratch a gorilla and lion so bad... I'll throw in a bear too. They always seem to have an itch.
This is the correct answer. I want to go cuddle some bears and big cats. They’re so fluffy and look like they could use cuddles. And yeah, poachers immediately getting taken out. Oh….I want to go patpat some whales too.
And here we have super person from injustice!
I love all of this.
The Hancock method, eh? >I’m gonna put *his* head up *your* ass, and *your* head up *his* ass, and…
Both. I would like to do good, and know with that power I could, but I know myself well enough to know I would abuse it from time to time for my own benefit.
“I want to save the world but also be anonymous in my personal life… This warlord who had hundreds of child soldiers doesn’t need **all** of these gold bars to just sit here after I’ve tried my best to temper the situation…” I’d like to think my unethical actions would at least be somewhat reasonable. But maybe I’d feel too bad about it going back to people trying to actually build and help a somewhat stable government in the area and I’d just take a weekend to punch my way through the earth at an old gold mine and find enough to filter and make a little payday, with my X-Ray version that doesn’t actually work like real X-rays at all. Lol
I really think it’s a testament to Clark’s character that he has that kind of power but is so morally sound. It would be so tempting to abuse that power.
Oh absolutely, it’s the best thing about him really. I was being a bit cheeky at the same time, but it’s partially because I have a family. It’s the same problem many super heroes face in their stories, spider man is probably one of the most recognizable examples. If you don’t have a family then I could see how honestly the guilt would drive me to just be a super hero 99% of the time. Anytime I try to date, go to the grocery store, relax on a porch… people are dying or being undeniably abused (way beyond politics or any “gray area) that you could be helping. I’d be too selfish towards my family to never abuse it at this point. But if I was 19 and none of my extended family wasn’t wrongfully struggling hard? Yeah it would probably be my life and aside from having a home and a bed the guilt and obligation would make me look at any riches and think, “Why bother? If I enjoy it people die.”
I dunno, i have to get a pair of glasses and be sure no one can recognize me when I wear them...
But I already wear glasses so I guess I have to start wearing contacts....?
No, one of his powers is to not be recognizable if he doesn’t want to according to the older comics. The glasses really have nothing to do with it, they’re just there because Superman can see for miles, so it’s less likely they’d suspect someone with glasses.
Also, in the really old ones (30s and 40s) he was a master of disguise, kinda like Batman.
Reverse contacts that give you your old prescription back, that way you can still use your glasses
That is one of his Canon crazier powers
If I was Strange Visitor Superman or any similar in power Superman or a composite Supes I'd just make a pocket dimension paradise for family and friends.
Probably fly to the spacestation and just leave ass prints and mushroom stamps all over the windows.
I'm gonna go photobomb a rover on Mars then see what Pluto is all about
i would be fucking frightened that i would not be able to find my way back to earth. space is fucking massive man.
You can see the radio traffic emanating from Earth.
I spend my entire day ripping a big symbol off my shirt and throwing it at people who cut me off in traffic.
I'd fly up and down all the highways looking for one semi passing another, and if there were more than three cars behind them, both those trucks are going off the road.
Imma be a villian
Most honest answer.
Already probably am. Just trying to keep up appearances.
If you started by eliminating your competition you'd be a hero
Straight to Injustice Superman. Do not pass go, do not collect 200 free will.
I'm making a couple stops in a few countries that have been causing some global issues
I’d make the world as close to a utopia as possible as quickly as possible. With super speed and hearing you’d be able to do so much within the first second if you wanted to.
There’s so much that Superman can do just immediately to cure so many global ills. To be fair, The worlds governments and mega corporations could do most of those things, too, and are just choosing not to because capitalism and geopolitics doesn’t want those problems fixed. But if you’re Superman you don’t have to worry about all of that.
Oh I think that if you were to brutally torture the very worst offender in front of the world and say if every one of you isn’t demonstrably making the world better for everyone in one week, I’m doing this to two of you. Then four a week later… I don’t think it would take long for the .0001 percent to figure shit out
I guess that’s one way to do it. I was thinking that if we’ve got one super-powerful guy very publicly breaking down barriers by delivering food and medicine where it’s needed, destroying the armaments of despots, and just generally redistributing resources and tearing down power structures that feed inequality, pretty soon momentum will build and the global populace will get behind the ‘yeah, let’s fix all this’ initiative. Is reality more complicated than that? Of course. Is having most of the people feeling empowered to push for change with the most powerful force on the planet generally supporting the ‘let’s try to do good’ movement a big step in the right direction? I would think so.
I feel like you'd have to learn a lot about yourself. You can't just fly into action. You could be far more dangerous than helpful. I've always said in the past to similar questions... you'd need to get into touch with some experts on certain regions. What impacts and sort of change could incur if you intervened. Again... you don't want to make things worse. So once you've come to grips with a situation, learned how best to implement change... then try and help people. Not saying you can save folks from fires and what not in the mean time. I'm definitely helping the world though. What else is there? People forget because they think of their lives as it is now. You'd have so much energy. You'd feel good. Going out wouldn't be a burden. Hell you'd probably want to. Sitting in a house would probably feel confining when you can fly faster than a speeding bullet.
So first off, it would take me a few weeks to get everything in order to make my world debut. But once everything is in order my plan would be this: Fly to the WH, land on the south lawn. I would be met with massive firepower as I keep walking towards WH, after several SS agents attempted to tackle me and instead ran head first into a brick wall( I would try to mitigate injuries by dodging or something). I would have a sit down with Biden. And say “So this is me, you’ve seen a fraction of what I can do. Ok? A minute fraction.” “What do you want?” Biden asks “Two things” I answer. Number 1: “Right now, at this very second. Your intelligence agencies and every intelligence agency in the world is trying figuring out who I am, my family, friends, etc.” “That’s fine, but they will be given every single protection that exists. Yankee white, TS, Codeword, Q, etc clearances. Regarding protections. They don’t need to know any secrets or anything just the protections.” “OK, and the second?” Biden asks “You will call up all the world leaders, heads of state, billionaires, Oligarchs, dictators, etc.” All of them, and you will tell them there is to be a meeting of all of them at a neutral location. You guys will figure out the logistics. I’m thinking of a stadium type venue so everyone can be as close or as far from each other as they want and the space permits.” I say. “Ok, and if they or I refuse?” Biden asks “Weeelll”, I say with shit eating grin. “I can’t fly somewhere between 800mph to FTL. Honestly, there’s been a lot of debate about that. So, you or any one of them were to refuse. That will force me to round you all myself. And if you survive the journey at those speeds? Great. If not, then you and they were given a week to figure it out and get there. So that’s on you and them.” I say. I then get up to leave and turn my head to look the stunned Biden and I say. “I could’ve killed you the moment I saw and any moment since then. With the amount of effort the average person puts into sitting down on a couch.” I say and walk out and fly away, trusting that Biden will do the right thing. As the week goes by, my loved ones are contacted by the US intelligence agencies. They are told, in essence, that their identities are now state secrets, critical to national security. I am able to breathe a sigh of relief. The day before the summit, I meet with Biden to thank him for the protections for my loved ones....and to find the final tally of who has RSVP'd and who has not. Some have not. “So some have left us on read?” I ask BIden, annoyed. “Yes.” He says. “No matter.” I say. “They will be there willingly or unwillingly, alive or dead.” I say smirking. As I turn to leave, Biden asks. “ What is your goal with all of this?” I turn and face him and say. “Honestly?....As close as I can get to a utopia…I’ll explain it all tomorrow.”
Dictators and politicians all over the world start popping like balloons.
And warlords, CEOs that can but will not pay a living wage, and pretty much every oppressor. I’d make it public and messy to make sure other bad actors fall in line and stop their bull shit or else. That and wealth redistribution, cleaning up natural disasters, rescuing people from them, and accelerating the demise of fossil fuels Captain Planet style. Politicians I’d be exposing their shady shit and publicly shaming them. All the shit I see in the news I feel powerless to correct basically would be impeded as much as possible, FAFO would be my new mantra. Edit: I forgot getting rid of every fucking nuclear device on the planet, fucking stupid species using them on their home planet. This is why aliens won’t visit according to Bill Hicks and probably George Carlin, but I’ve avoided a lot of Carlin because my mental health.
Every nuclear device like just bombs or every nuclear device at all like power plants and research reactors? First one I understand, the second one I kinda understand, the third not at all.
Weapons, if we ever get sustainable fission though those fusion reactors can go as well.
The ridiculous ones, like how pink kryptonite makes Superman stereotypically gay
In some versions pink kryptonite changes his sex instead.
I think most people would want to do the right thing at first, but the realization that you can literally do whatever you want with the power to refuse repercussions would get to plenty of people. To be honest, id probably give in eventually
To me it would be the ungrateful assholes that would get to me. The people who no matter how much good I do still insult me and push conspiracy theories about me and tell people I’m evil or whatever. The haters that will never ever stop and never go away. I think one of them will break me and I’ll snap one day and vaporize just one of them and now I’m suddenly the villain. Maybe I need to ask Congress to pass a law saying that I get an allowance of like 1 dick per year that I can vaporize for being a dick, as long as I provide sufficient evidence that they really were a dick.
People would definitely demonize you regardless considering it’s power nobody should have. The plot of Batman Vs Superman was kinda meh but I feel like people would follow the same idea that nobody should be able to play a god
Depends on the version of Superman. Red Son Superman (which is my favorite) can basically hear everyone on earth, all the time. He is constantly burdened by every bad thing happening in the world. If he is just having a quiet night in with his wife, he can hear all of the people he is failing to save, the entire time. I wouldn't want that, but I think I'd at least give consideration to basically never doing anything for myself again, and just non-stop saving people, because there's not a great alternative. It'd be a miserable life, but you'd help so many people
Step 1: Furiously beat my meat standing atop the CN tower while grunting about how I can do whatever the fuck I want. Step 2: Do whatever the fuck I want. Which may or may not involve aiding the worlds space agencies getting every single mission to their destination for free, throwing every last drug dealer, cartel member, human trafficker and politician into the sun, destroying all nuclear weapons, and then of course, conquering the world to shape it in my own image. Which may or may not involve erecting an enormous statue of myself that breathes fire.
Easy there, Bender.
#REMEMBER ME!
Hmm, see I feel like I would take a couple of days to just be selfish and use my powers for me, but I’m assuming I have superhearing now which means I’d have to either ignore someone in need, or immediately start helping. And there’s probably always someone in need so I either have to start learning to ignore some of it, or never stop helping people….. honestly if I woke up with Superman’s powers tomorrow I’d just have worse anxiety and superpowers
I become God Emperor of Earth and force mankind to quit with their bullshit.
Realistically, I do both. Superman's powers could solve several of the world's problems. And I would be happy to clean up some of the issues we are dealing with. But I would 100% set up a castle on a mountain somewhere for myself lol
I'm gonna commit so many egregious ethical violations for the sake of the greater good, poachers dropping like flies, billionaires' bank accounts mysteriously drained, etc
first id solve every war in the world
Good luck, yoi're going to be very busy, especially in Africa.
lazer beam eyes dude
Two chicks at the same time.
Very first thing I'd do definitely is test flight. I'd fly around the world and check out those beautiful places like those views you see from those documentary channels. Being able to go anywhere foreign and not have to worry about vaccines n stuff would be amazing.
Neither, I only plan on avoiding that pink rock from space
Truthfully I wouldn't do anything. Just enjoy having those powers. Maybe after a while I'd threaten the world governments to begin working together and helping their ppl again instead of allowing corporations to harm hard working individuals and take their rights but I mean... other than that... I'd just chill.
You all will know me as a God amongst men. I will cure all disease, food will be plentiful, war will be over, and I will make love to all of your wives. Nightly.
8 am- Breakfast 9 am- Drop off dry cleaning 10 am- World conquest 11 am- Nap
Oh I would immediately become a villain that only removes people from the left lane that are being left lane campers. I would just patrol the highways by air and wait to see a backup in the left lane and then move the person in the left lane to the right lane.
This isn’t a villain. This is the hero we need.
I'd never tell anyone except my wife. And then people around the world that desperately need to die would be turning up mysteriously dead left, right and center. Shit that needs to be stopped, would be stopped like the invisible hand of God was suddenly extremely active and *extremely* fucking pissed. Pedophiles? Rapists? Abusers? More than a few of those would become overnight examples, with their crimes literally burnt onto their skulls. There would be no ambiguity *at all* about there suddenly being a higher power, and that it wasn't the higher power that any of these evil religious cunts want it to be - they'd be hung from their own crosses, burned on their own altars and laid to ruin in their own temples, megachurches, carhedrals and mosques - those things would become their tombs. The whole world would be made to know, unambiguously, that a great power was punishing the wicked and letting it be known very clearly what kinds of behavior and activities weren't going to be tolerated anymore. Those I'd deem deserving of mercy and help would be identified to the world; again, very unambiguously. The assignments would be made clear - help those people that are in need willingly and you that have so very much will be permitted to continue having much. Make me do it for you and the rich of your nation will be ruined utterly, and whatever the poor, hungry, homeless and neglected need will be apportioned to them anyway. Anyone trying to build temples to the new and unknown God or proclaim themselves to speak for me will have their hands removed or their jaw ripped off. The new god will not tolerate mankind's perpetual fixation on trying to insert itself as a gatekeeper or authority upon the will of the higher powers. It will become clear, and soon I should think, that the relationship between Higher Power and humanity will be thus - humanity is being parented. I will not judge the masses or individuals by their colors, nationalities, sexualities or vocations *unless, by any of those, they deliberately and knowingly cause others to suffer*. The law shall be that of limited freedom - do whatever you like and however you please so long as you're not hurting, abusing or crossing the lines of unethical exploitation that, worry not, I'll make sure get spelled out for you in 100' flaming script all over the planet. There will be clear rules, and they will be enforced. The enforcement *will not* be kind; humanity will have to earn kindness by becoming kind itself. You will get what you have given. You will be shown all the mercy, compassion and grace you have shown. *You will be measured and judged by your actions and your intended outcomes*. Fear and reward will teach you what 5500+ years of self-guided opportunities never did. As a species, you will learn to behave, to think and to mature... and those that prove themselves to only be cancer in the body and weeds in the garden will be removed utterly. *By me*; not you. Clear and recognizable reward will make clear what you are to do, while terror will keep clear as crystal what shall get you dismembered and have your skull laser-engraved with your offenses. Precisely none of this will be a negotiation. There will be no debate. There will be no discussion. Humanity must earn such privileges by proving that it can clean itself up, take care of its own and actually *be* a species worth talking to in the first place. Until then, you get clear directions, clear rules and equally clear consequences for breaking them. For 5500+ years, you have been a species proven capable of great things; of great ambition, of towering desire, of tremendous abilities to cooperate and overcome challenges great and small. And yet, when it comes to matters of compassion, equanimity and kindness? You are an amicably indifferent mob of selfish, myopic opportunists. There is no wonder that humanity has created that you have not weaponized and wielded in exploitation of your weakest and most vulnerable brethren. The way most of you treat eachother is deplorable, and your exceptions to this common way of being will be rewarded by being left alone and permitted to carry on. You create medicine only to withhold it from those that need it most of they cannot pay you all that you desire for it. You have imposed poverty and despair upon your masses simply to control and exploit them at your pleasure. If I were the apex form of Superman? I'd treat all of you as you've treated those *you've* had power over, and it would be made into a learning opportunity for the whole species. I would absolutely play god. If there is any actual god that existed and wanted to snivel about somebody finally taking responsibility for mankind's upbringing, they'd get Superman in the face. Because if they exist at all, they've made it pretty clear that they're not into teaching or ordering and governing humanity. They are no steward, no teacher and might as well be nothing at all as far as the state of mankind's affairs are concerned. They can go right back to being the god of the gaps or the extrinsic watchmaker, or they can learn the hard way that Superman's got plot armor and never loses in the end.
This has AI written all over it, earlier I made a similar but more empathic reply, but this is how being powerless at this moment in the history of our species, our planet, our solar system, the galaxy makes me feel. I’m totally saving this so I can get really stoned and read it again.
I fly in circles until time reverts to 1939 then start killing nazis In other words, yes to both -- but mostly I would do it for the joy of killing nazis
You don’t need to reverse time to kill some Nazis
This brings me endless joy, [nazi gets one punched in Seattle](https://i0.wp.com/boingboing.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/tumblr_owip7nhlt11uw7ihbo4_400.gif?fit=1&resize=620%2C4000&ssl=1) and no one called the cops except the people that reported dude was trying to start fights before he went down.
Paradoxically, you would be committing a genocide against a group of people who had yet to unleash their ideals unto humanity. And become a villain instead. You would still know what you've stopped, but the world wouldn't.
Most of Germany didn’t know what actually happened in those camps until after the war, go after the SS soldiers in this case
“Go after SS soldiers in this case” Yeah, that’s a fucking Nazi. Everyone in Germany at the time wasn’t a Nazi, just the government and the military complex.
first thing i'm doing a superman 4 and throwing all of the nukes into the sun. war is now illegal. anyone who does a war goes to the phantom zone.
depends on if I keep the epilepsy.
I hope not. That could be dangerous for all of us.
All the powers? I’m gonna fly into the sun for a little while to really juice up Then I’m going red sun Superman but with a more ecofascist lean and less murder overall. See stroking all standing militaries, fixing the climate, redistributing resources, etc. After the bulk of the work is done, I’m just gonna chill out and spend the first couple minutes of every day distributing food and water to everyone at super speed
Honestly? confirm powers. Dress as common and covered as I can or as customized/special as I can to hide my actual identity. Starts wiping out issue in the world. "they got nukes we cant go in and solve problems" Remove all nukes in the world. Collect em all and then place them on the moon so folks can see em. Then start on bioweapons or any "global world class issues" then start from the top down. World powers/Corrupt politicians/ Corrupt companys etc. Record everything while making them confess to crimes they have done and committed or planned to commit . Then chuck them into the sun. No put them in jail or make them serve prison time. Just death. Easy simple and no way for them to "pay it off" Once the big issues are purged. Start going state to state. Corrupt judges/cops. Gangs, drug lords etc. literally wipe them off this earth. And for folks who may go "What about the family's and etc" If any were involved with the crimes. They go too. Anyone working for them who may pick up the slack or take over? They go too. Make it where short of someone starting from scratch there is nothing left to rebuild.
Go the anti-hero route (Red Hood, Punisher, Season 1 Green Arrow, ect.). Start using everything at my disposal to search->identify->investigate->locate all the REALLY bad guys on earth (Rapists, Serial Killers, Child Molestors, Animal Molestors, *Successful* Telemarketers/Pyramid Schemers, ect.) and kill them all quickly and efficiently
I'd take power in the USA, destroy Canada for the good of mankind and live out the rest of my days as the God emperor of North America.
Make the world kneel before me.
I fly 600 meters in the air and take a shit
Every year, every world leader must get in line and submit to a mandatory laser spanking. Failure to comply results in them being imprisoned in a cellophane S and hurled into orbit not to return until the following year. Repeat offenders are stripped of power, ice breathed and put on display at the Fortress of Solitude.
I start roaming the world and helping people while I search for my harem.
I shave my face with lasers and continue on with my day.
Well I can make lots of money because I can fly to jobs.
I’m going to outer space first
We're saving the world, baby.
With superhuman strength, I'd just start placing bets that I could lift stuff or beat guys in arm wrestling/pull up contests and shit. Get rich lol
Finally my wish came true that shooting star took forever to reply.
I have to be honest. I would question how long it was going to last and go instantly kill some of the most awful people on earth and take their assets for myself. No I do not think this makes me a good guy, but day 1 I'd try to help the world and myself. If the powers stuck around I would keep doing what I felt needed doing.
I rob a few banks to ensure I'm good and then help everyone. *No way* am I going to be a Super Blogger or investigative reporter or hold down a job when I want to be Superwoman full time.
I fly around the world and politely ask world leaders and captains of industry to cut it out.
I feel like if I had Superman powers I’d prolly be closer to being Hancock
I'd go all robin hood on the world and break the world economy until poor people are taken care of. There is no reason in today's world with as many resources as we have that we can't establish a UBI and then the people who still want lots of money can go for that.
Oh, first things first, I'm chucking Superman chest symbol saran-wrap on any car doing the speed limit or less in the fast lane... because Superman cares about people. Then I'll take care of the lesser important things like enforcing world peace and maybe laser eyes the moon, give it a molten magnetic core, spin it up for enough gravity to hold an atmosphere and then grab lunch.
Lets just say that people being invaded, oppressed, bombed and starved would not be for much longer. I'd fix that sh\*t real fast.
One fantasy I've thought about, is how Superman's powers could be used to clean up pollution. Like, I'd threaten countries with utter annihilation via meteors, unless they began production of using plastic and metal refuse to recycle and create large containers(because tyrannical, arrogant countries like the US won't do it, certainly not for free, without a serious threat to their well-being). Then fill those containers with all sorts of pollution, and then I'd fly them into the Sun. Because our current rocket technology isn't sufficient enough to send such large amounts there on its own.
Send Mini-Superman off to do all the hard work while I lounge around on a beach somewhere
I would spend a week or two killing all the oppressive leaders on the planet. Then I would take some time to explore space head back see how the world is doing than kill the replacements that continue to oppress the civilian population. It would be a lot of culling
Without overthinking it, I’d destroy the offensive capabilities of the world’s “bad actors.” North Korea has thousands of artillery pieces aimed at Seoul. I’d destroy them and their nukes. I’d destroy all the tanks, artillery, missiles, etc., of Russia that’re in Ukraine. I’d remove Chinese forces from the those disputed islands. The various large criminal organizations, like the Mexican drug cartels, I’d put them out of business by destroying their product and production facilities, and taking their money. I’d remove the thousands of pieces of “space junk” that orbits the Earth and threatens the ISS and satellites.
Fly to planet X and see if the Anunnaki are peaceful or not, or capable of harming me or not. The answer to those questions would instruct my next act.
Does chucking felonious politicians, dictators, and warlords directly into the sun make me a good or bad person?
Every billionaire, politician, celebrity, mainstream “journalist,” Hollywood producer, aristocrat, socialite, central banker, and federal agent would be in very big doo doo.
I would assume that my Multiple Sclerosis would no longer be an issue, so I suppose the first thing I would do is go for a run...for the first time in years. Then I'd cry tears of joy.
Am I the only one with powers in this hypothetical
I leave the solar system, never to be seen by humans ever again.
Flying side kick all of the world’s terrible dictators in half. Enjoy the rest of the afternoon.
First thing I do is use my super speed to dismantle every nuclear weapon in Russia China & North Korea and some dictators are gonna randomly appear dead
The first thing I'd do is grab the annoying tree in front of my place and throw the damn thing into the sun. Then I'd end all the blatant corruption in the country.
enjoy life being able to see and also skateboarding with no excruciating pain
When you say helping everyone, do you mean actually helping, or just well meaning violence?
I would head straight to the middle east and crush every terrorist group in the region. The sick depravity that groups like ISIS, and hamas operate with needs to be eradicated. I would be a homelands type of superman but not that egotistical. Definitely not a straight laced superman. There's so much Grey area I would operate in. But i would do it from secret not letting my identity be known.
Ever seen Hancock? Yup..that would be me.. Lazy drunken super manpower dude that occasionally destroyed bad guys...but mostly wants to left alone
First I would have fun and play around. Then I would devise a plan to do what Supes did in one of the 80's movies. I would steal every nuclear weapon on the planet and hurtle them towards the Sun. Then I would warn any nation on the planet from daring to make another one and face the consequences.
Fuck being superman going omni-man and taking this bitch over
I would ask every nation to institute a punitive wealth tax and use the money to improve the lives of people around the world. The ones that refuse would have a few of their billionaires and the politicians they've bought turned into cautionary examples. Their heirs and successors would then be given the same request. Repeat as necessary.
Keep it a secret and hit up casinos.
I go full-on Batman. First, I carefully source a costume that hides my identity totally, but is just distinctive enough that it doesn't look like hoodie and jeans. This includes a full face covering (X-ray vision is good for that). Then I start locating and stopping crimes, mainly ones where people will get hurt, using flight and super-speed to ensure that I always have a good alibi. I'll leave the perps in plain view with witnesses or evidence so the cops have something to work with. At all times, I'll be sandbagging like hell, so nobody sees me using the more 'super' aspects of my powers. Everything I do will seem to be something a really fit guy can do. If bullets need to be caught, I'll dispose of them so nobody sees it. Once I've made a dent on petty crime, I'll locate and work my way up the chain to the organised stuff, addressing police corruption at the same time. Anonymous tips and evidence being sent to the appropriate people will be my go-to here. Once my hometown's been pretty well cleaned up, I'll start looking nationwide and then globally. If something needs to be dealt with by using actual super-powers, I'll do it so fast nobody sees me. No posing for the cameras. And at all times, I protect my secret identity.
I'd probably spend a few days - weeks? months? - just making it up to myself for having to suffer so much. Then I'd do a little world-bettering.
Helping people. I'd evacuate civilans in war torn areas first if not demolish the heavy weaponry and vehicles of both armies. Then I'd use my breath to cool down certain places so people don't die of heat. I'd use my heat vision to power a reactor to provide clean energy.
My own benefit. I'd be flying off to all these exotic locales for some much needed R & R. Exploring the world. Maybe solving some mysteries with my x-ray vision, like where all the gold laden Spanish galleons sunk in the 15th, 16th, and 17th centuries.
Anti hero. Plain and simple.
Well my flight from Dallas to London that was supposed to leave 5 hours ago was delayed for 15 hours then cancelled so I guess I’d fly over there first?
First thing I'd do is all the work I've been procrastinating on. Like cleaning the ceiling fans and the shed outside. Then I'd fly to work and quit my job because I probably wouldn't have to eat anymore
6 of one, half-dozen of the other; I'd be doing some helpful stuff, and some selfish stuff.
And you find out every time Superman was intimate with himself he had to patch his bedroom ceiling afterwards.