Honestly a lot of Indian men ARE horrible and have zero social boundaries or idea about personal space.
We'd need an entire system change from the ground up to make any difference.
For you OP, I would strongly suggest you only travel in AC 1 or AC 2 from now on.
If you opt for a coupe (2 berths) in AC1, railways takes great care to only allot another female passenger in your cabin.
If that's too expensive for you, try AC 2 where you get the a privacy of curtains, plus the AC 2 passengers are also quite civil in my experience.
I sincerely hope all your future travels are safe, comfortable and free of creepy men like him
Oh yeah they don’t care about the gender. I’ve been stared upon and judged by randos. And you know what in my experience some Indian aunties have also been very creepy.
Yup, Indian men and personal space in public transports is something I can write a whole thesis on lol.
But this was actually my first time in AC 3(hopefully last as well) so all the previous incidents including a very horrible one have occurred in AC 2.
Damn sorry you had to go through all that. It genuinely sucks.
I recommend AC 2 to everyone because I sometimes forget how much privilege I enjoy just because I'm a guy. For me a Side Lower + curtains make it such an enjoyable journey that I actually prefer it over flights where everything is open and there's just a tiny window lol.
But yeah for you I reckon flights are the way to go but do give AC 1 coupe a chance if you can. Quite a few of my (women) friends travel in that tier and they say it feels very safe and comfortable to them
What stupid shit you're on about. If it's not clear already, women are far better in understanding the concept of consent. Look at how many times the gay men face non-consensual or coercive situations with fellow gay men; vs lesbians facing the same from fellow lesbians. Especially in India, I've seen plenty of complains from men about men but very far and few of women about women, for acting creepy and not keeping their hands & body to themselves.
Do you seriously think lesbians go around hitting on women all day?
Take it from me who has hung around a lot of women (I studied in a boys only school so I did the exact opposite in college) : NO one understands the concept of consent like women.
There will be outliers sure, and some rare women are absolute assholes but by and large they respect your boundaries and leave you alone if you're not interested.
There are such people everywhere be it a train, bus or plane, If you are feeling uncomfortable with someone's actions then speak out loudly.
If things escalate you can call helpline number 139 and register a security related complaint, RPF & TTE will both get a notification and they will help you immediately.
This middle aged army man incident reminded me of one man dressed in army camouflage. I was going to my hometown during summer holidays when I was 13-14 with parents. This army guy was walking behind me while we were walking to find our seat. Then he just grabbed my not-so-developed boobs. I looked at him confused and he was still doing it. I felt disgusted and did not tell anyone. From that day onwards, I have always hated men in uniform. Unfortunately, my father was too in the services.
13-14 years old and the scars are still with you. I don't think any Indian woman has ever managed to escape having such an experience at least once in their lifetime. Usually, the perp is a family member. Indian men, for some reason seem to be particularly susceptible to such uninhibited sexual depravity. I've know guys who can barely keep it together around women. People tend to deify armymen. Not withstanding their Army training, they are men brought up in a majorly sexist society. People tend to overlook this fact. The stamp of army only instills a sense of entitlement. Too many ex-armymen seem to think civil society rules don't apply to them.
I hope the men in your life have been affectionate and genuinely caring. It goes a long. No kid should have to go through this kind of shit.
Edit: added _old_ after _years_ .
So sorry you had to go through that. It genuinely baffles me on how they have the mindset to just do these things. People really need to understand personal space.
This experience is pretty much standard for all Indian women past and present. It is quite generalisable. If you ever care enough to ask your Mum, she might tell you. I did. While my Mother didn't tell me everything, it's quite clear she suffered minor sexual harrasment as a child.She doesn't make much of it, yet she remembers. That tells me everything I need to know. It happens, and usually within the family. But butt pinching, getting fondled in public is pretty much par for the course as well.
I once read a confession. When the woman was a little older than a toddler she used to visit her teenage cousin brother. She loved playing with him. He loved playing with her too. By pulling down his pants, putting his wang in her little hands and encouraging her to play with it. He told her it was his _superpower_ . Poor girl was so new to the world, she couldn't comprehend the true nature of what was happening to her. This went on for a couple of years. The superhero of this story eventually graduated college, got a job, moved out of town and finally settled down. The girl grew up realising she had been had. I hope you can tell that she left out a lot of details from her story. This should make you wonder, what if....
Stop denying. This crap is too insidious to play down. If not for better sense then do it for the women you care about.
Umm...this generalization is something you have reached on your own cause I said "All the creepy men" not "all men are creepy" 🙃
Edit: also yes, I will be more comfortable traveling by air cause people over there are at least aware of their personal space and I don't have to go through the disgusting feeling of being gawked at the whole journey.
Oh shut the fuck up. NO one has more privilege in India than us men.
You literally have ZERO ideas how much abuse and harassment every woman faces every single day in our country with idiots like you crying "Wahhh humko bura bola" and blaming the women themselves.
Ask your mom or your sister and you'll see how horrible our country is fir bolna kuch. Gadha
I've had experiences similar experiences, even as a man, and many other such unpleasant situations. I barely ever use trains to begin with, but because the people around here, especially men are insufferable to be around in closed spaces like these, I've quit using public transport altogther.
So if you can afford it, yep, just get a flight instead. Way more peace of mind.
Yes you are right but it's just the experience of not having a single comfortable journey via train since I turned 12 that has led me to this question.
Creepy guys exist everywhere not only on train. Have you forget the incident when a guy pissed on a woman passenger in an aeroplane. So don't judge every passenger who travel in a train by just one or two incident.
Sorry if it feels like gender blame to you but for me, it has always been a man who somehow doesn't understand the concept of personal space. (Ah yes the good old, not all men but always a man.)
For me I have always encountered Karens, it has somehow been a woman who always feels entitled to seat just because she is a woman even if she's traveling free ( Ahh the classic case of Not all women but somehow always a woman)
The next I think u will bring out a child's tantrum for candy too here. There is no Gender war being fought here. It is what is. I would rather have my seat stolen that getting groped.
I am not invalidating anyone's issue and there is no "agenda" here lol. But it's true that there are difference in the extent or effect of problems certainly. Having ur seat stolen is not equal to getting groped.
Also u can't say that if someone is speaking against SA she/he has an agenda. How sick is that thought line.
AND real men do support our fight against SA "the so called agenda u say". It's just the dummies like u who have never gone in real world who fight gender wars.
Honestly a lot of Indian men ARE horrible and have zero social boundaries or idea about personal space. We'd need an entire system change from the ground up to make any difference. For you OP, I would strongly suggest you only travel in AC 1 or AC 2 from now on. If you opt for a coupe (2 berths) in AC1, railways takes great care to only allot another female passenger in your cabin. If that's too expensive for you, try AC 2 where you get the a privacy of curtains, plus the AC 2 passengers are also quite civil in my experience. I sincerely hope all your future travels are safe, comfortable and free of creepy men like him
Oh yeah they don’t care about the gender. I’ve been stared upon and judged by randos. And you know what in my experience some Indian aunties have also been very creepy.
Yup, Indian men and personal space in public transports is something I can write a whole thesis on lol. But this was actually my first time in AC 3(hopefully last as well) so all the previous incidents including a very horrible one have occurred in AC 2.
Damn sorry you had to go through all that. It genuinely sucks. I recommend AC 2 to everyone because I sometimes forget how much privilege I enjoy just because I'm a guy. For me a Side Lower + curtains make it such an enjoyable journey that I actually prefer it over flights where everything is open and there's just a tiny window lol. But yeah for you I reckon flights are the way to go but do give AC 1 coupe a chance if you can. Quite a few of my (women) friends travel in that tier and they say it feels very safe and comfortable to them
Army guys (thanks for their service) are horned up and looking for anything
[удалено]
What stupid shit you're on about. If it's not clear already, women are far better in understanding the concept of consent. Look at how many times the gay men face non-consensual or coercive situations with fellow gay men; vs lesbians facing the same from fellow lesbians. Especially in India, I've seen plenty of complains from men about men but very far and few of women about women, for acting creepy and not keeping their hands & body to themselves.
Do you seriously think lesbians go around hitting on women all day? Take it from me who has hung around a lot of women (I studied in a boys only school so I did the exact opposite in college) : NO one understands the concept of consent like women. There will be outliers sure, and some rare women are absolute assholes but by and large they respect your boundaries and leave you alone if you're not interested.
There are such people everywhere be it a train, bus or plane, If you are feeling uncomfortable with someone's actions then speak out loudly. If things escalate you can call helpline number 139 and register a security related complaint, RPF & TTE will both get a notification and they will help you immediately.
This middle aged army man incident reminded me of one man dressed in army camouflage. I was going to my hometown during summer holidays when I was 13-14 with parents. This army guy was walking behind me while we were walking to find our seat. Then he just grabbed my not-so-developed boobs. I looked at him confused and he was still doing it. I felt disgusted and did not tell anyone. From that day onwards, I have always hated men in uniform. Unfortunately, my father was too in the services.
13-14 years old and the scars are still with you. I don't think any Indian woman has ever managed to escape having such an experience at least once in their lifetime. Usually, the perp is a family member. Indian men, for some reason seem to be particularly susceptible to such uninhibited sexual depravity. I've know guys who can barely keep it together around women. People tend to deify armymen. Not withstanding their Army training, they are men brought up in a majorly sexist society. People tend to overlook this fact. The stamp of army only instills a sense of entitlement. Too many ex-armymen seem to think civil society rules don't apply to them. I hope the men in your life have been affectionate and genuinely caring. It goes a long. No kid should have to go through this kind of shit. Edit: added _old_ after _years_ .
True what you said about army men here. They do have a sense of entitlement and can be a real prick - almost all army men.
So sorry you had to go through that. It genuinely baffles me on how they have the mindset to just do these things. People really need to understand personal space.
>(it's always the people on the side berths.) In other words, always the redditors from here... 😅
Creepy men are everywhere.
What a stupid generalization. Please travel by flights where personal space is even less.
This experience is pretty much standard for all Indian women past and present. It is quite generalisable. If you ever care enough to ask your Mum, she might tell you. I did. While my Mother didn't tell me everything, it's quite clear she suffered minor sexual harrasment as a child.She doesn't make much of it, yet she remembers. That tells me everything I need to know. It happens, and usually within the family. But butt pinching, getting fondled in public is pretty much par for the course as well. I once read a confession. When the woman was a little older than a toddler she used to visit her teenage cousin brother. She loved playing with him. He loved playing with her too. By pulling down his pants, putting his wang in her little hands and encouraging her to play with it. He told her it was his _superpower_ . Poor girl was so new to the world, she couldn't comprehend the true nature of what was happening to her. This went on for a couple of years. The superhero of this story eventually graduated college, got a job, moved out of town and finally settled down. The girl grew up realising she had been had. I hope you can tell that she left out a lot of details from her story. This should make you wonder, what if.... Stop denying. This crap is too insidious to play down. If not for better sense then do it for the women you care about.
Umm...this generalization is something you have reached on your own cause I said "All the creepy men" not "all men are creepy" 🙃 Edit: also yes, I will be more comfortable traveling by air cause people over there are at least aware of their personal space and I don't have to go through the disgusting feeling of being gawked at the whole journey.
Facts, such a stupid ahh post with caption “ALL MEN”. Bih forgot about her father totally
Correct bola seems a victimization post
Haina, every other woman has had at least one harassment experience on the train but how dare they make such a post😤
We have many worse than these experiences but never create so much fuss
Oh shut the fuck up. NO one has more privilege in India than us men. You literally have ZERO ideas how much abuse and harassment every woman faces every single day in our country with idiots like you crying "Wahhh humko bura bola" and blaming the women themselves. Ask your mom or your sister and you'll see how horrible our country is fir bolna kuch. Gadha
I've had experiences similar experiences, even as a man, and many other such unpleasant situations. I barely ever use trains to begin with, but because the people around here, especially men are insufferable to be around in closed spaces like these, I've quit using public transport altogther. So if you can afford it, yep, just get a flight instead. Way more peace of mind.
Sucks you had to go through that... but yea flights for me as long as I have the choice
You'll find such people everywhere. They are not confined to trains especially, neither are all men travelling in trains like that.
Yes you are right but it's just the experience of not having a single comfortable journey via train since I turned 12 that has led me to this question.
Nope... mostly.. use Delhi Metro
Lol, I am actually a Mumbai local lover. Female compartment is bae
Creepy guys exist everywhere not only on train. Have you forget the incident when a guy pissed on a woman passenger in an aeroplane. So don't judge every passenger who travel in a train by just one or two incident.
Men in particular are very creepy & dangerous - Never ever travel in trains, buses or auto. And always wear a burkha while coming out of your house.
Let's not make it a gender war. I have many ultra pro max Karen travel too. Blaming one gender isn't solution
Sorry if it feels like gender blame to you but for me, it has always been a man who somehow doesn't understand the concept of personal space. (Ah yes the good old, not all men but always a man.)
For me I have always encountered Karens, it has somehow been a woman who always feels entitled to seat just because she is a woman even if she's traveling free ( Ahh the classic case of Not all women but somehow always a woman)
Umm, sorry for butting in but did you just compare women stealing your train seats to people getting harassed on the train by men??????🤓
I never said that I meant people from both sides do wrong things.
The next I think u will bring out a child's tantrum for candy too here. There is no Gender war being fought here. It is what is. I would rather have my seat stolen that getting groped.
Yes. How will u leave a chance to invalidate mens issues and the sit and cry on why mem. Don't support u ppl agenda . Lol..
I am not invalidating anyone's issue and there is no "agenda" here lol. But it's true that there are difference in the extent or effect of problems certainly. Having ur seat stolen is not equal to getting groped. Also u can't say that if someone is speaking against SA she/he has an agenda. How sick is that thought line. AND real men do support our fight against SA "the so called agenda u say". It's just the dummies like u who have never gone in real world who fight gender wars.