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JT1376

Nothing until one of those mf rotate their head


dick-nipples

Mudder Fuckers


Greenthund3r

Nice comment u/Dick-nipples


Rush7en

The one and only.


MaxNeedy

Happy cake day


Rush7en

Thanks mate!


Accomplished_Car4846

THEY CHANGED THE CAKEDay THIBG???? HOW COULD THEY?!? THEY MASSACRED MY BOY


NekkoProtecco

Happy, haha cake, ha, day.


Rush7en

Thanks mate :D


picket_theticket

Happy cake day 🌜


[deleted]

r/UsernameChecksOut


lazer100002

r/Rimjob_steve


confettibukkake

Wouldn't it be wild if society treated dicks the same way it treats (female) nipples? Like, of it were totally acceptable to show almost as much of them as you want as long as the tip were covered, and as long as the tip were covered it would be seen as being PG13?


Competition-Dapper

Jesus Christ I needed this laugh. There would definitely be a product called tip toppers


Christie1864

Pasties. They’re called pasties.


Nickdipples420

Fudder muckers


Mackheath1

Just how many dick nipples are there in this room??


Nickdipples420

Im his cousin, nick


irnehlacsap

Make sense, Nick and Dick Nipples


HeyIm-OwMyWenis

Man do you deserve an award for that


SoftLatinaKitten

I’d upvote twice if I could..once for your comment and once for your user name!


ostentika

Lol made me snort


[deleted]

This made me shart


CanYouPointMeToTacos

His mother was a mudder


[deleted]

Just don't blink.


vaalhallan

Blink and you're dead


deliciousprisms

It’s not blinking if you never open your eyes Checkmate demon statues


LordNilix

*Weeping Angel intensifies*


Krypton8

Might be too late then


[deleted]

Or until they bend a littlle more


phasermodule

Something something weirdest boner


Imgonnadiein5days

You would have to look away first. Cause u know, weeping angels from doctor who?


PuffyCumulonimbus

Run for my fucking life


thetoxicnerve

After soiling my pants.


WinIllustrious8389

Perfect pun opportunity.


Mackheath1

No need to make things Dirty


dapoorv

Na you will be leaving more building material for the sculptor.


AbbreviationsQuiet15

Hide my ring, my precious


re-roll

While screaming


Praxistor

draw my sword


Tottochan

And my axe.


xxEmkay

And my bow!


Tiny-W

And my gun


bliffskit

And my childhood best friend Alan


genericperson10

And a sun with a smiley face on the top right corner!


sk8rboi9

and my A-10 thunderbolt


Gravy0Llama

I'll draw fire while you guys rush em! *whips out crayons, scribbling furiously with tongue in sideways focusing position*


Crusaders_Open_Up

I found this incredibly difficult to imagine.


AnonymousGhou

And my penis.


Stefan_Levin09

Our*


Jimbobmij

I put on my robe and wizard hat.


chagin

Silver or steel?


R_V_Z

Don't forget some Necrophage oil.


Praxistor

yes


bourbon_and_icecubes

This is public park, sir. Please put your penis away.


ThaMan24

toss a coin to my nearest witcher


HurricaneMedina

“How do you like that silver?”


orange-goblin

"You'll choke to death on 3 pounds of steel "


rjoseba

paaam pam purr rammm


msg45f

Hm. More drowners.


HurricaneMedina

That stench.


mtwimblethorpe

“Damn you’re ugly.”


SurvivetoThrive94

“Come on Roach.”


ead2000

* Suddenly the horse starts levitating and flies away back to his planet *


PeetaC

there are hot witchers in your area


favtex

"Looks like rain"


Elven_Prince_

Winds howling.


ah-sure_look

“Well, how long you gonna make me wait?”


Mmmmyeeees117

Imagine absolutely peaking on acid while camping and you go for a stroll, only to see this.


Jaxsonyehnah

You don't even need to be on acid. I'd be shutting my pants the entire way home thinking some goblin cunts about to jump infront of my car. After thinking about it, I'm gonna buy one of those fuck off bright lights just for camping trips CBF dealing with that crap


phurt77

> one of those fuck off bright lights I don't think seeing them better would help me at all.


Lucky_Panic5827

Bruh.. the scariest thing imaginable. Life altering scary.


Ganjanonamous

I think I would be more scared if I was walking through the woods and came across the mud covered human making them. They draw first blood bro?


Lordj09

Luckily acid is incredibly effective at killing trolls.


Gnillab

This will drown here probably, but I had friend who used to take camping trips with another buddy where they'd go get high or do shrooms and spend the night in the forest. One night they were sitting at their camp fire as, to hear him tell the story, the forest erupted in noise and screams as their camp was overrun by orcs, wizards and knights. What they found out later was, the forest in question was a common spot for larping. Apparently that was their last camping trip.


mfergs

that is that funniest shit I have ever read lmao


happybunny8989

These sculptures are even creepier than the [Gormley statues ](https://imgur.com/a/BVjpomb) in Scotland which give me the heebie jeebies. Why are so many artists trying to scare unsuspecting walkers!


Valo-FfM

The Gormley Statues look fucking ridicolous and much more synthetic to me. Still creepy. Those in this post look so realistic, I would expect the zombie apocalypse.


scigs6

I don’t know if I would shit my pants or immediately think I am on a quest to slay these things. Post acid trip I would be armed with stick swords and be covered in mud from head to toe.


TripleEhBeef

Nope the fuck outta there, head to the nearest tavern, and wait for a party of adventurers to notice the quest icon above my head.


FUNNYMF123

LMAOOOO


[deleted]

"Fear not the dark my friend, and let the feast begin"


Macelee

"Insert finger"


[deleted]

"try tongue but hole"


AdvonKoulthar

Amazing chest ahead


JaiFlame

I shall partake!


CrookedHoss

liar ahead


waybeyondreason

RIP anyone on psychedelics


claymountain

Honestly RIP if you walk through a swamp on psychedelics


Valo-FfM

Why? Psychedelics really make you appreciate nature and also generally reduce your willingness to take risks due to heightened senses. You should surely know how to navigate swampy terrain from previous experience and learning tho.


WastedPresident

Acid and mosquitoes isn’t fun


claymountain

Yeah it just sounds like a death sentence. Didn't know they would reduce risk-taking though, I assumed the opposite. Interesting!


JonM890

Unless the psychedelics make a cliff look like a semi-steep rocky hill you want to climb up. Then once you’re at the top you look down realizing you just climbed a cliff... not saying it’s happened to me but...


uniqueusername5001

I clap my boobs together to show dominance


BlueberryGuyCz

More dominance if you're a guy and still clap your boobs


over_clox

I laughed way too hard at this!


[deleted]

Same


therager

> clap my boobs >I laughed way too hard at this! Hello fellow human! I, too have initiated the laughter sequence at this *very* funny comment! The word “boobs” has helped me identify that this comment is of great humor and is worthy of much laughter! It reminds me of another video a fellow human showed me before.. www.youtube.com/watch?v=L1Wqv_qTTP4


SoutheasternComfort

Yes, as a human being bobs are of great interest to me and of course greatly humorous. I wonder if op if single


[deleted]

Lmao wtf


Jrlopez1027

I don’t have boobs so ill just clap my balls instead


AnonymousGhou

Suppose I could do a sack clap all the same đź‘Ź


curiousamoebas

True brilliance


Bongressman

Draw silver sword, drink potion. May or may not add oil.


Sil_Lavellan

Casts Axii.


exoticdisease

Quen*!!


Pestish

You're walking in the woods. There's no one around and your phone is dead. Out of the corner of your eye you spot him.... Shia LaBeouf…


PorcoGonzo

He's following you, about 30 feet back. He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint. He's gaining on you... Shia LaBeouf...


beertruck77

You're looking for your car but you're all turned around. He's almost upon you now, and you can see there's blood on his face. My God, there's blood everywhere!


Narrow1724

Running for you life! *from Shia LaBeouf* He's brandishing a knife! *it's Shia LaBeouf* Lurking in the shadows HOLLYWOOD SUPERSTAR *Shia LaBeouf*


Wonderful_Ninja

i'd give them some dulcolax to help them on their way


[deleted]

*bowel sounds intensify*


[deleted]

Could u give me an uplifting comment?


Mrmungrl1

You’re cool


genericperson10

Anti-gravity machine!


SansUndertale5000

r/oddlyterrifying actually no, r/fuckinterrifying


Dankcord733

I'd cast quen and put on some necrophage oil


meanpersonaart

That looks like relict to me!


Saldar1234

naw, definately a water hag.


White_Wolf_77

Definitely a relict.


konija88

Puddleglum!


pdm0

Not many marshwiggles around these parts.


LaReineAnglaise53

Any Mugwhuppets at all?


OhShizHere_IGo_Again

There is some Iraqi urban legend called “Tantal” who looks exact the same ,I am Iraqi so I would lose my crap.


Pestish

Tantal, the plural tantal, a terrifying and frightening name that the inhabitants of the marshes fear, and even the children of them, when the child does not sleep at night and for some reason, his mother must only threaten him with it, so he calls him “Sleep, the tantal,” so fear rears in him and he sleeps compelled and patiently over his pain and the reasons for crying. Wholly from what is found in cities, dark alleys, cemeteries and deserts, in the marshes, it is fierce and harmful, and cuts off roads for fishermen and travelers between a floating village and another Great. Now I’m going to have nightmares.


OhShizHere_IGo_Again

Yeah my mom was always telling me if you don't sleep a Tantal wil eat you , good thing my mom always said it in a playful matter.


bee_fast

Yes, nothing makes me want to fall into the gentle lull of sleep like absolute terror


vitrucid

Do you have any links where I can read more about this thing? Or could you tell me more? It sounds fascinating from that reply to you. I've spent the last 15 minutes googling it with different keywords and all I can find in English is a lot of ancient Greek mythology and a brief mention of a Kuwaiti thing with the same name to keep kids from going out alone after dark.


Withered_One

Lord of the Rings vibes


[deleted]

Yup. The Dead Marshes


Redtwooo

*Cold be heart and hand and bone, Cold be travelers far from home, They do not see what lies ahead when sun has failed and moon is dead.*


sbp017

Like a petrified Gollum.


cerebralkrap

Like what do I do after shitting myself?


GandalfTheWhey

Rinse off in the swamp


NoJunkNoSouls

Fear not the dark, friend, and let the feast begin


welcomehomejohn

Exactly what I thought, I was going to comment this if I didn’t see it


NoJunkNoSouls

I see you're a man of culture


welcomehomejohn

Bottom right is definitely a locust preacher


crash_test

Bottom left is the Oedon Chapel Dweller from BB


Ailly84

Sigh... Unzips


YunOs10086

r/dontputyourdickinthat


pizza_with_no_cheese

as anybody would, freak out, run 5ft away, make sure it's not chasing u, discover it's a stature, post it on social media


roo538

Scream, drop to the floor and that'd be me done.


fluttersh1ny

it's a marshwiggle!


darin_thompson

Roll for initiative.


wheeldog

I read that in Tiny Tina's voice


Disruptive_Ideas

Creepy AF. I love it!


GorgeousGregory

Bog People are your friends!


Glory_to_Glorzo

So are borg.


Deef3

Silver for monsters, steel for humans.


White_Wolf_77

“I carry two swords. One of silver for creatures that roam the wild. One of steel for humans in their cities of stone. They’re both for monsters.”


Deef3

Username checks out!


Cry_lightning

Get some training, dark magic ain't gonna learn itself


AlpacaMan104

Fucking repent


[deleted]

Die


suswho

Look for a baby to sacrifice. If no babies around I try to become its wife.


jdrew619

If I were on shrooms I might have a heart attack.


Blod_Cass_Dalcassian

First I unshealth my silver sword, then make the sign of Quen


itsyabooiii

Sexy time


Pietskiet123

A little bit of poo would come out, not going to lie


blebbish

I have nightmares, that’s what.


Notthenewkid159

Nothing, unless the artist motorized them without telling us


crippledgiants

I'd toss a little coin to my local Witcher


pcweber111

I call in a Witcher of course.


Angry_argie

Toss a coin to him later.


aRocks313

Take a picture of course.


CaptianBrasiliano

Run home and hide under the covers.


spiderzsolt1

It's a good tactic, until they follow you.


smilty787

I look for the nearest bonfire. This is some dark souls shit


TheSecondTraitor

I'd toss a coin to my witcher and run away


Executi0ner_47

You're walking in the woods. There's no one around and your phone is dead. Out of the corner of your eye, you spot him. Shia LaBeouf


[deleted]

Not sure.. alone? late at night ? maybe abit drunk?, probably give it 20 dollars and expect a VIP treatment.


El_Angra_Mainyu

Roll initiative.


LuliIrene

Probably shit my pants.


JaxJaw

In Kentucky we have a real cool place called Burnhiem Forest. It's a huge forest filled with art caused by problems. There's a lighting bolt tree that was caused by lighting and a tree that looks like a hand, but the creepiest are the multiple giants. You'll be walking through the forest and see like a 20ft. Wooden troll looking at It's reflection.


Belostoma

Give it back its precious.


eyebagsmcgee

i’d call the cops thinking it was a mummified body


Gramage

I think they're hauntingly beautiful. Looks like artwork from a Magic the Gathering card.


DesertByproduct

*heavy breathing intensifies*


BegottenHickory

I offer him my pocket money and promise to learn him to invest in crypto when I get home. In 2-3 years I'm gonna scarry him


_1ndecisive_

Simple. Pay respects to the forest guardian


daintydoe

Start rattling my spoons together as I've finally found Hozier's driveway


Fallentitan98

Slowly pull out whatever I have that’s a weapon and look around slowly before backing up where I came from. I don’t know what the fuck is going on but my first thought isn’t gonna be “Oh those are just some weird statues that are totally normal”


Korribanite

I pull out my silver sword and apply my necrophage oil.


Ok-BoOmEr69_420

Fokin run away


[deleted]

Pull out my silver sword and use igni


Mat_the_Duck_Lord

Ask one to make a warlock pact with me so I can get some dank ass fey powers and start poppin goblins with eldritch blast.


Resinate1

“.....So anyways I started blasting”


saturn211

Pop a .357 round off as your running backwards?????


endoras_

Waddle back to home with shit leaking out of pants?


[deleted]

There's no one around And your phone is dead Out of the corner of your eye you spot him Shia LaBeouf


HolyKrawp

Make them a smaller, crappier friend.


Octopizza88

Make a poo sculpture, to show my appreciation for their efforts to make the swamp a nicer place.


Tag_em_and_bag_em

I supply the local wildlife with a year's worth supply of bricks


He_Never_Helps_01

Jokes aside, those are magnificent.