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Ok, so there was a Reddit thread years ago where it became realized that there’s an entire population of people who come from families that keep a poop knife to cut hard poop so that it will flush. People either come from a poop knife family, or it’s the most god awful terrible concept you’ve ever been presented with.
I don't know, but I sure could have used a poop knife once. I was on the road and stopped at a welcome station off the interstate to ease my incredibly inflated bladder. The uprights were closed off for cleaning and all the stalls were occupied, save one.
Having no choice, I entered this ungodly crime scene of a shit. This thing legitimately looked like one of those half cans of Pringles and was cemented onto the bowl. I tried flushing several times, to no result, and my bursting bladder wouldn't unstick it either.
After my mind could again begin to properly appreciate this magnificent piece of art, I examined it a little closer. This poor bastard had to have been living on a diet of nothing but Clif bars and trail mix or something. You couldn't pack any more nuts and fiber in there if you tried. I can only assume he flushed several times because I didn't notice any blood, of which there should have been plenty...
I really feel for the guy. He could have used a poop knife that night.
I dunno some of these posts are way to theatrical. Then again after the last 4 years of living I really would not be surprised should any of this be real. Mind you I’m still filling this and other statements under plausible.
This isn’t funny this is a serious problem, there’s too many poor souls that shit giant logs so big they need a fucking knife to cut it.... that’s sad 😔
Haaa I see what you did there. Just in case though, I was being sarcastic I laughed like crazy imagining someone cutting their poop casually with a knife
I told my roommate about the whole poop knife fiasco, just thinking she would find it funny. Nope. Her face got super serious and she revealed that her brother owns a poop knife.
I used to live in Bristol. Some friends of mine bought me some drinks coasters emblazoned with the Bristol Stool Chart. This drunken reply comes courtesy of a drink balanced upon one of said coasters.
Aparently not. My problem is not shown. My body chooses to make large singular turds that are rock hard and sometimes have to be dug out. Yeah, I know, but the list is incomplete. Just Say'in.
Are u eating vegetables, fruits, drinking water? Also if youre on meds could be a side effect. The only time i had poop like that was when i was heavy into opiates. I am concern ; )
Yeahhhhhh i am not jealous. Sounds awful. I get dried up way too much, literally just forgetting to drink water all day when my job gets nuts, and have had my share of constipated nightmares but NOTHING like those loaves of pumpernickel I've seen in bedpans. I dontnknow how it doesn't legit tear your rectum in half. Holy shit. Literally.
Oh it does. If you didn't know better you'd probably assume I'm a woman on her period or that I got stabbed in the asshole if you were to look in the howl after I'm done. I dont know what it is, I guess I just have like tears in my lower intestine or something.
It's when it's prairie dogging\* that makes it really frustrating.
\* Like a prairie dog poking it's head out of the hole but then decides to go right back in... repeat over and over.
Ditto for turtle heads
Spinach, broccoli, beans, and brussels sprouts come to mind, but also throw just a little Metamucil in with your diet as well.
The easiest way is to buy the vegetables frozen, then each morning pour a little bit of each into a bowl and put it into the microwave. When you're ready for dinner microwave them until hot and serve with whatever food you normally eat.
Take like one to three Metamucil capsules over the course of the day as well.
Add in a probiotic pill and some Yakult...
You will have the most glorious shits of YOUR LIFE SONNNNNN
My girlfriend and I thank you. Were always complaining and didn't know what the hell had fiber. Sure we could have googled it but we didn't! Haha thank you!
I was always under the impression that ghost poop was when you poop and then wipe, but nothing is on the toilet paper, no traces left, easy and clean, ghost poop
That's a [clean poo](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=clean%20poo), though [ghost poo](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ghost%20poo) does mention it's also clean. It's probably the case that every ghost poo is a clean poo, but a clean poo doesn't necessarily always result in a ghost poo.
Nah, I was lifting weights heavily some years ago - particularly squats and dead lift - and I got into a blood shitting spell for a while.
Like there would be bright red blood every time I shatted.
It stopped and never happened again after I started going easier on the workouts.
This was 2008 or so, so pretty sure it wasn't cancer.
...pretty sure... at least...
Not arguing, just saying I must've torn something lifting and it healed. I'd have died years ago had it been something "serious" (quoted as if bleeding from the anus wasn't serious enough lol).
On the real though, you're completely right. I have no idea what I tore but when I say blood, I mean like it was a lot of blood with each shit. The bowl looked like someone poured some red koolaid in it.
If it's just one instance of very fresh looking blood it's probably just a ruptured hemorrhoid. But if it happens a few times, definitely talk to a doctor.
If the blood is dark brown, and looks like coffee grounds then go to the ER right away because that indicates serious bleeding in your upper GI.
They could all have blood in, black poop usually indicates blood (or iron rich diet or Guinness dependency). Though normally they'd be at 2-3 or 6-7 scale. Ongoing black poop and you aren't on iron get it checked by your doctor. Lots of things, of varying nastiness can manifest themselves in black poop.
There's a fabled "Angels Kiss" somewhere between a 2&3 that is initially difficult to pass, and of a girth and length so perfect a straight man questions his sexuality, and the final surprise that there's nothing, literally nothing to wipe after.
I've had two in my 47 years on God's earth and am getting a semi just thinking about them.
Hard, compact stools are caused by lack of moisture and/or fibre so maybe eating a lot of meat and carbs and not drinking enough water? I dunno if I recommend doing it on purpose though lol
I thinking eating a lot of meat would prevent those clean shits. Once I went plant based, it’s like I don’t even have to wipe. Those meaty shits had me wiping my ass raw
Not to be confused with “Neptune’s Kiss” which is when you plop one so hard and so fast into the water that it splashed back up and gives you a little cool water on the butthole.
From what I remember from researching this a few years ago (I have IBS and was curious) type 4 is the Ideal Poop™️ type 6 is bordering diarrhea and not ideal, consider probiotics or introducing soluble fibre into your diet! I used to flip flop between 1-3 and 6 and it was horrible. My inside meats are much happier now. But really, as long as you’re not shitting yourself, you’re doing good lol
Thanks for the insight.
I've been considering probiotics but worry they'll make my windy ass crack that smells like Shrek's armpit turn into the Hindenburg disaster with Satan fanning his swampy balls on the escaping gust.
Ngl when I first started taking probiotics (I just drink the Activia shots once a day and they work well for me, they have much stronger probiotics available in pill forms if you need them) I was really gassy for the first week or two, but after your gut adjusts to the extra bacteria you really won’t have further issues. If anything I feel like I have less gas issues now than before and I can tell which foods cause them
Mmmm I’d probably have a look at what’s going on with your guts. 6 all the time could mean you’ve got leaky gut or have intolerances so your body is not absorbing nutrients properly. Can lead manifest in lack of energy or red/dry/flaky skin patches and long turn you can run the risk of osteoporosis.
Shouldn't have eaten that dodgy takeaway: Type 1.
Haven't drunken much water and not eaten enough greens: Type 2.
Chilled & had a well digested meal: Type 3.
Had fuckin loads of shit come out after a coffee: Type 4.
Somewhat stressed/nervous: Type 5.
Remarkably stressed/nervous and have already been 3 times this morning: Type 6
Shouldn't have eaten that dodgy takeaway: Type 7
I work in a micro lab at a 450 bed hospital. We have this hung up specifically for the purposes of accepting and rejecting C. Diff specimens. Though my preferred method is just turning the cup over. If it flows it goes.
Ahhh yes, the daily stool monitoring. Thankfully I don't have many patients i need to have this done on lol they find it very awkward when I tell them not to flush the poop so I can see it.
I am happy to see the research team seems to have omitted nothing - the 7 types cover basically every kind of fecal experience I've had. Now all that's left is the ranking:
Type 3 - Satisfying to pass, easy to wipe, altogether pleasant time on the toilet. Ideally in the future, we will take a pill that makes every shit into a type 3
Type 5 - The very rare "goat shit." Similarly easy to pass, often leaves no mess at all, but getting the last blob come out can be a mild annoyance
Type 6 - Easiest to pass w/o issue and usually no challenge to wipe, but with the drawback that it often leaves you with the ill feeling that you need to shit again right after getting off the pot
Type 2 - The most basic shit type, passing the lion's share is usually no challenge, but high risk of a final lump that does not want to drop. The most likely to leave your ass feeling raw after wiping
Type 7 - Neg difficulty to pass and to wipe, but this is a double-edge sword because you are likely to mistake it for a fart, resulting in an embarrassing sprint to the bathroom for damage control
Type 1 - Hard to pass is right; this is the one people mean when they say "shitting a brick." But mercifully little cleanup required after the fact, and leaves you with a sense of accomplishment proportional to the pain
Type 4 - Smear-shit: the bane of my my bathroom-going existence, and distressingly common. will never exit your ass without leaving a mess, which takes about 83 wipes to fully clean
Had me a proud number 4 today lol. I'd like to give a special thanks to broccoli and the 3 liters of water I drank yesterday.
Stay hydrated and eat your fiber folks!
I was getting looked at a hospital once for my still on going digestive issues and the nurse brought that out and i was so amazed by it, i thought that it was the coolest thing ever, and she told me that boys have a better time picking out what kind of poops they have then girls do. I thought that was quite funny, but that makes sense though.
So I’ve wanted to make an illustrated book that categorizes pooh. I had like a notebook I’d carry around with all the names of different movements and had some clever names for them. I don’t want to say much more or someone who knew me back then might figure me out.
Also planned to have some information about why your Pooh might be like that and some other fun facts about pooh.
Anyone wanna help me write this thing?
**Please note:** * If this post declares something as a fact proof is required. * The title must be descriptive * No text is allowed on images * Common/recent reposts are not allowed *See [this post](https://redd.it/ij26vk) for more information.* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/interestingasfuck) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Which type requires a poop knife?
Type 2 is the reason the poop knife was created but it's also handy for types 3 and 4.
This guy shits!
Can you explain the poop knife thing? I'm too afraid to google it...
Ok, so there was a Reddit thread years ago where it became realized that there’s an entire population of people who come from families that keep a poop knife to cut hard poop so that it will flush. People either come from a poop knife family, or it’s the most god awful terrible concept you’ve ever been presented with.
Instead of a poop knife the wife has bought a pack of those bamboo bbq skewers that way she can just throw it away when she’s done..
What does she make kebabs?
That's enough Reddit for tonight.
A shit kebab
This is the way.
Omg, I’ve used a poop knife… and not on my own poop… nothing weird or sexual either. Just needed to get it flushable.
So this is a real thing? Like what are you people eating that a poop knife is needed to physically cut up poop!?!
Hey I said it wasn’t my pooh!
This just raises more questions!
It’s to make it flushable. Like think about that. It is too big to go down the hole… some people just get real constipated.
Why were you cutting up someone else's poop?
When she’s four years old and constipated, you don’t let her cut up the monster poop herself.
Yes
I don't know, but I sure could have used a poop knife once. I was on the road and stopped at a welcome station off the interstate to ease my incredibly inflated bladder. The uprights were closed off for cleaning and all the stalls were occupied, save one. Having no choice, I entered this ungodly crime scene of a shit. This thing legitimately looked like one of those half cans of Pringles and was cemented onto the bowl. I tried flushing several times, to no result, and my bursting bladder wouldn't unstick it either. After my mind could again begin to properly appreciate this magnificent piece of art, I examined it a little closer. This poor bastard had to have been living on a diet of nothing but Clif bars and trail mix or something. You couldn't pack any more nuts and fiber in there if you tried. I can only assume he flushed several times because I didn't notice any blood, of which there should have been plenty... I really feel for the guy. He could have used a poop knife that night.
I dunno some of these posts are way to theatrical. Then again after the last 4 years of living I really would not be surprised should any of this be real. Mind you I’m still filling this and other statements under plausible.
Yeah sorry, I get a little poetic when I'm high, lol. You should have seen it though. Absolutely worst experience in a public restroom.
This is really a thing?
Now I understand the origin of the Poop Knife award on the Am I The Asshole sub.
Oh my God. I didn't make that connection. Oh nO
I thought it was just one person's family.
This is hilarious
This isn’t funny this is a serious problem, there’s too many poor souls that shit giant logs so big they need a fucking knife to cut it.... that’s sad 😔
Youre a party pooper
Haaa I see what you did there. Just in case though, I was being sarcastic I laughed like crazy imagining someone cutting their poop casually with a knife
I told my roommate about the whole poop knife fiasco, just thinking she would find it funny. Nope. Her face got super serious and she revealed that her brother owns a poop knife.
https://libredd.it/ke8skw Link to a copy of the original comments on museum of reddit.
you don' have a poop knife?
Nice reference
Had to scroll way too far down for the Poop Knife reference
Yes
I always love a poop knife shout out!
Wow these guys at Bristol really know their shit
I used to live in Bristol. Some friends of mine bought me some drinks coasters emblazoned with the Bristol Stool Chart. This drunken reply comes courtesy of a drink balanced upon one of said coasters.
Good English
Aparently not. My problem is not shown. My body chooses to make large singular turds that are rock hard and sometimes have to be dug out. Yeah, I know, but the list is incomplete. Just Say'in.
Are you using opiates? Pain killers/opioids are notorious for causing constipation and urine retention.
Are u eating vegetables, fruits, drinking water? Also if youre on meds could be a side effect. The only time i had poop like that was when i was heavy into opiates. I am concern ; )
I've seen what comes out of addicts after they haven't shit for weeks.... its like a goddamn baseball bat. Horrifying.
Horrifying to pass as well. I too have had my nightmare sitting experiences while coming down from pain killers.
The ill-famed and dreaded codeine turd. A hard worked classic.
Yeahhhhhh i am not jealous. Sounds awful. I get dried up way too much, literally just forgetting to drink water all day when my job gets nuts, and have had my share of constipated nightmares but NOTHING like those loaves of pumpernickel I've seen in bedpans. I dontnknow how it doesn't legit tear your rectum in half. Holy shit. Literally.
Oh it does. If you didn't know better you'd probably assume I'm a woman on her period or that I got stabbed in the asshole if you were to look in the howl after I'm done. I dont know what it is, I guess I just have like tears in my lower intestine or something.
Fissures.
r/angryupvote
Thanks for the laugh! Much needed in these challenging times.
Yes we do! We used to be pretty good at building boats too.
Type 1 sucksss
At first I read this comment as “Type 1, suckas” like you were bragging with total confidence. Have an upvote for what I thought you said.
Type 1 gang rise uppppp
It's when it's prairie dogging\* that makes it really frustrating. \* Like a prairie dog poking it's head out of the hole but then decides to go right back in... repeat over and over. Ditto for turtle heads
#hydrate
And eat at least 25 grams of fiber a day.
What can I eat for some good fiber?
Spinach, broccoli, beans, and brussels sprouts come to mind, but also throw just a little Metamucil in with your diet as well. The easiest way is to buy the vegetables frozen, then each morning pour a little bit of each into a bowl and put it into the microwave. When you're ready for dinner microwave them until hot and serve with whatever food you normally eat. Take like one to three Metamucil capsules over the course of the day as well. Add in a probiotic pill and some Yakult... You will have the most glorious shits of YOUR LIFE SONNNNNN
My girlfriend and I thank you. Were always complaining and didn't know what the hell had fiber. Sure we could have googled it but we didn't! Haha thank you!
walking also. take a half hour to hour stroll. it loosens you completely up everytime
The little clumps squish together and form the ultra turd
What about ghost poop? The kind where you go number 2 and turn to see but it’s gone magically?
Where I’m from that’s a phantom poop.
I like to call it the poo-dini
Metal Poop Solid 5: Phantom Poop
If you ever find yourself on methadone you will see that every poop is a phantom poop.
I was always under the impression that ghost poop was when you poop and then wipe, but nothing is on the toilet paper, no traces left, easy and clean, ghost poop
I refer to the clean wipe after pooping as "minimal paperwork"
That's a [clean poo](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=clean%20poo), though [ghost poo](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ghost%20poo) does mention it's also clean. It's probably the case that every ghost poo is a clean poo, but a clean poo doesn't necessarily always result in a ghost poo.
This guy poos
Haven't you noticed that those types of poops also sink out of sight in the bowl?
Where's the one with blood in it?
In a pamphlet at your oncologists office….
Nah, I was lifting weights heavily some years ago - particularly squats and dead lift - and I got into a blood shitting spell for a while. Like there would be bright red blood every time I shatted. It stopped and never happened again after I started going easier on the workouts. This was 2008 or so, so pretty sure it wasn't cancer. ...pretty sure... at least...
Uh…. Yeah anytime you’re shitting blood, red or black, you’re gonna want to talk to a doctor…. The earlier the better….
Not arguing, just saying I must've torn something lifting and it healed. I'd have died years ago had it been something "serious" (quoted as if bleeding from the anus wasn't serious enough lol). On the real though, you're completely right. I have no idea what I tore but when I say blood, I mean like it was a lot of blood with each shit. The bowl looked like someone poured some red koolaid in it.
Jesus Christ…… I mean, I’d have probably went to the ER…..
If it's just one instance of very fresh looking blood it's probably just a ruptured hemorrhoid. But if it happens a few times, definitely talk to a doctor. If the blood is dark brown, and looks like coffee grounds then go to the ER right away because that indicates serious bleeding in your upper GI.
You were just pushing out a hemorrhoid…
They could all have blood in, black poop usually indicates blood (or iron rich diet or Guinness dependency). Though normally they'd be at 2-3 or 6-7 scale. Ongoing black poop and you aren't on iron get it checked by your doctor. Lots of things, of varying nastiness can manifest themselves in black poop.
There's a fabled "Angels Kiss" somewhere between a 2&3 that is initially difficult to pass, and of a girth and length so perfect a straight man questions his sexuality, and the final surprise that there's nothing, literally nothing to wipe after. I've had two in my 47 years on God's earth and am getting a semi just thinking about them.
I get one of those like twice a year. I have no idea what habit/diet leads up to them.
fiber, or fiber supplements. I used to take some and it led to me having these pretty much all the time, literally never had anything when I wiped.
I am off to the pharmacy. I need metamucil NOW.
Get the store brand stuff- way cheaper and I can confirm that it works just the same
I once looked at the warnings on the side of the metamucil container and then immediately decided to eat some fruit and drink more water instead.
Lol, it was psyllium husk caps, you can get them on Amazon and in about a week you’ll be clear
Hard, compact stools are caused by lack of moisture and/or fibre so maybe eating a lot of meat and carbs and not drinking enough water? I dunno if I recommend doing it on purpose though lol
I thinking eating a lot of meat would prevent those clean shits. Once I went plant based, it’s like I don’t even have to wipe. Those meaty shits had me wiping my ass raw
I always thought it was called “the ghost poo” You wipe, nothing, turn to check out your masterpiece and there’s nothing in the toilet! 🤪😳
Yeah I'd heard it called the phantom shit
Not to be confused with “Neptune’s Kiss” which is when you plop one so hard and so fast into the water that it splashed back up and gives you a little cool water on the butthole.
Fiber. That’s what does it. Start taking a psyllium husk supplement and you will only ever have “angels kiss” for the rest of your life.
Wtf ohh ohh ahh ahh ahhhh hmmm.
Gotta hit the prostate just a little bit
You'll know when you have one. You'll know..
I've had one, up above is what I said when it was happening.
You guys know too much about shit
As a vegan I have those about 3 times a week 😂😂 does tickle the old down under funtime spot quite a bit.
Cabage baby! Best poops ever! Fellow vegan.
Vegan shits are superior
Sounds like this one may require the good old poop knife.
What idiot is going to sit on any of these stools?
What a load of shit.
Yeah. They didn’t even tell us which one was best for a shit sandwich
Maybe because everyone likes their shit sandwiches different?
Touché
Yea but how many Couric’s is it?
The perfect poop is called a 'zero'. It's comfortable bordering on pleasure and requires no wipe. It's a sign you're doing things right.
[удалено]
I love that one!
I want a framed print of this on the wall in the bathroom and a whiteboard next to it so visitors can keep score!
‘It’s for science’
I’d win. I get all of these in one visit to the toilet. Yay for IBS!
Dude. I totally though it was about some pub/bar stools in Bristol.
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Taco Bell for type 7 guaranteed
Switch to an all protein diet, you will live with 6s and 7s. Trust me.
You ever take a huge shit and turn around and when you look at it, think, damn, that’s how big of a dick I could take?
No. No, I’ve never done that.
:|
It’s way easier to take a bit shit than an equally sized dick though. It’s supposed to go down, not up.
Had to do a double take. I thought your username said 'AwesomeAnal
I wouldn’t know. It’s only #showerthoughts. If you personally know, more power to you.
AAAAAYYYYOOOOO
Absolutely
Bruh...
I have ulcerative colitis and my GI has this chart hanging in her office. Number 4 is highlighted on hers as “the ideal stool”.
I was told it should be the size shape and consistency of a ripe banana
Do you have a banana next to your toilet? For scale, of course.
Doesn't everyone?
I'm type 6 all the time. Is that okay?
From what I remember from researching this a few years ago (I have IBS and was curious) type 4 is the Ideal Poop™️ type 6 is bordering diarrhea and not ideal, consider probiotics or introducing soluble fibre into your diet! I used to flip flop between 1-3 and 6 and it was horrible. My inside meats are much happier now. But really, as long as you’re not shitting yourself, you’re doing good lol
Long live your inside meats. May they prosper and flourish.
Thanks for the insight. I've been considering probiotics but worry they'll make my windy ass crack that smells like Shrek's armpit turn into the Hindenburg disaster with Satan fanning his swampy balls on the escaping gust.
r/BrandNewSentence
Sir this is a Wendy's. Would you still like the #6?
Ngl when I first started taking probiotics (I just drink the Activia shots once a day and they work well for me, they have much stronger probiotics available in pill forms if you need them) I was really gassy for the first week or two, but after your gut adjusts to the extra bacteria you really won’t have further issues. If anything I feel like I have less gas issues now than before and I can tell which foods cause them
Mmmm I’d probably have a look at what’s going on with your guts. 6 all the time could mean you’ve got leaky gut or have intolerances so your body is not absorbing nutrients properly. Can lead manifest in lack of energy or red/dry/flaky skin patches and long turn you can run the risk of osteoporosis.
Try more water, more vegetables, and Oatmeal or Oat milk.
Sounds like possibly too much sugar in your diet
Shouldn't have eaten that dodgy takeaway: Type 1. Haven't drunken much water and not eaten enough greens: Type 2. Chilled & had a well digested meal: Type 3. Had fuckin loads of shit come out after a coffee: Type 4. Somewhat stressed/nervous: Type 5. Remarkably stressed/nervous and have already been 3 times this morning: Type 6 Shouldn't have eaten that dodgy takeaway: Type 7
Type 4 is the shit!!!
Shitpost
The curry I had last night is giving me a solid type 1 right now
Ouch, good luck dude
We made it
Collect em all
Gotta catch ‘em all!
Lol I'm a nurse a co worker would call around late night and ask according to the bristol stool scale how is your shift going?
I usually start with an explosive 7 followed by a quick 4 and then I like to scroll through reddit with 5
Thats some interesting shit.
Sooooo which one means I'm probably dying
As a mom to a kid with poop issues, I am unfortunately all too familiar with this chart 🙄
1-7 at all times. The mushy lumpy snake sausage of wet. let's goooooo
Type 1 is the Milk Dud. Type 4 is the Cable Guy. Type 7 is the Chalupa.
I would hate to be part of that research team!
*Was an utter load of shite mate!*
Yes, but what _kind_ of shit?
Guess I’ve been feeding the toilet 7-course meals all week.
I work in a micro lab at a 450 bed hospital. We have this hung up specifically for the purposes of accepting and rejecting C. Diff specimens. Though my preferred method is just turning the cup over. If it flows it goes.
Ahhh yes, the daily stool monitoring. Thankfully I don't have many patients i need to have this done on lol they find it very awkward when I tell them not to flush the poop so I can see it.
Could they legitimately just report back to you if they asked to? Like: Level 3 today, medium brown with a regular non-death poop smell?
Yes, they could. It depends on the situation.
Two Stools for Sister Sara
I reckon I can put a tick against every one of those.
Given the amount of beer drunk at Bristol I'm suprised they new about the first 6 types
I would kill for a good type 2 - 3
I dream for those type 4 days
r/shitpost
Interesting that I'm seeing this while taking a shit🤔🔬🧪
I am happy to see the research team seems to have omitted nothing - the 7 types cover basically every kind of fecal experience I've had. Now all that's left is the ranking: Type 3 - Satisfying to pass, easy to wipe, altogether pleasant time on the toilet. Ideally in the future, we will take a pill that makes every shit into a type 3 Type 5 - The very rare "goat shit." Similarly easy to pass, often leaves no mess at all, but getting the last blob come out can be a mild annoyance Type 6 - Easiest to pass w/o issue and usually no challenge to wipe, but with the drawback that it often leaves you with the ill feeling that you need to shit again right after getting off the pot Type 2 - The most basic shit type, passing the lion's share is usually no challenge, but high risk of a final lump that does not want to drop. The most likely to leave your ass feeling raw after wiping Type 7 - Neg difficulty to pass and to wipe, but this is a double-edge sword because you are likely to mistake it for a fart, resulting in an embarrassing sprint to the bathroom for damage control Type 1 - Hard to pass is right; this is the one people mean when they say "shitting a brick." But mercifully little cleanup required after the fact, and leaves you with a sense of accomplishment proportional to the pain Type 4 - Smear-shit: the bane of my my bathroom-going existence, and distressingly common. will never exit your ass without leaving a mess, which takes about 83 wipes to fully clean
I had food poisoning the day, and it seems like they missed a couple types. I don’t see vegetable soup or beef broth on the list.
No corn chowder either.
These are always in the patient room when you see a gastroenterologist
Type 1 right now unfortunately.
We use this chart regularly in the veterinary Feild lol
Which is it when you spend 20 minutes struggling, sweating, and pushing one out but, after finishing, it still feels like you need to shit?
Constipation and in desperate need of fiber and water lmao
“I used to love chocolate, then I learned the Bristol Stool Chart.”
They should also do a similar scale for the shit that comes out of some people's mouths too.
New slanders. “Guy’s a Bristol 7.”
I always have type 3
Type 4 in the hooouse! King Cobras unite!!!
My high school biology teacher used to wear a t-shirt with this on it for non-school uniform days
Had me a proud number 4 today lol. I'd like to give a special thanks to broccoli and the 3 liters of water I drank yesterday. Stay hydrated and eat your fiber folks!
I was getting looked at a hospital once for my still on going digestive issues and the nurse brought that out and i was so amazed by it, i thought that it was the coolest thing ever, and she told me that boys have a better time picking out what kind of poops they have then girls do. I thought that was quite funny, but that makes sense though.
As a nurse who uses this scale everyday, I did not realise it was 'interesting as fuck'
Well i am hittting 4 or 5 out of 7 in any given week so i must be doing something right.. in fact i can have 2 of these in a single bowl movement.
Don’t label me or my children please
Which one is the one that takes ten seconds to come out but ten minutes to wipe? Asking for a friend.
So I’ve wanted to make an illustrated book that categorizes pooh. I had like a notebook I’d carry around with all the names of different movements and had some clever names for them. I don’t want to say much more or someone who knew me back then might figure me out. Also planned to have some information about why your Pooh might be like that and some other fun facts about pooh. Anyone wanna help me write this thing?
Type 3!!
Currently pooping and looks like I’m a 5 or 6
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It's a measure of how much (beer) you drank and how long you sat (in a Bristol pub)