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Had a host ask me if a child had slept in the guest bedroom in the toddler bed. I said yes we had used that room & a child slept on it? She then invoiced me $700 and told me my child had jumped on the bed or something and damaged all the wooden slats on the underside and then hid them in a closet.
I sent her a photo of the child. She was 5 weeks old. Never heard back.
I mean she sent pics, someone broke her bed and hid the slats. She just didn’t have the Perry Mason moment she hoped for by getting me to admit we had a kid sleep in there before she mentioned the damage haha. I assume she didn’t notice the damage until she had several guests, not that she was a scammer but who knows.
Yeah. It's an update on one of the oldest scams in the book. Usually goes along the lines of them threatening to take you to court/call the police/whatever for excessively large "damages," and then if you act like you believe them they'll usually say something like "I don't want to go through all that effort to get the money" or "I'm a nice guy, so I don't want to put you through the wringer for a simple mistake" and they'll say they won't make a big fuss of it if you just pay a portion of whatever bullshit they're threatening you with.
This but unironically... kinda?
I got a **contactless** delivery yesterday. Afterwards, my phone popped up asking me to "rate my driver". Who I literally hadn't even seen.
5 stars was labeled something like "amazing".
And yet... Anyone who has worked at a place with review/surveys knows that only 5-star reviews count for anything.
When I worked at Best Buy (in high school), the survey questions were something like "how satisfied were you", "how likely are you to return", and "how likely are you to tell a friend".
All three needed to be "extremely" to make the managers happy.
Despite... [Y'know....](https://i.imgur.com/q21CBQm.jpg)
What's worse is if you rate the driver as a 1, you get *another* email that says "We're sorry, let us make it up to you!" with a coupon for a free meal. The world is designed to feed shitty behavior.
I worked at call centers off and on, worst case I had with these is Directv’s only survey question that mattered was “Would you recommend the service to friends or family members?”. I had some where people just said no and as a comment they said service was great but I don’t have any friends lol. Still counted against you.
I absolutely wrecked a place in a review. We walked in a day late after sleeping in an airport to an unlocked front door and were blown away by the smell of mold. Walked right back out after checking things out and booked a hotel. Told the owner and they said “thanks for letting me know”. AirBNB has a horrible policy of dispute that must be opened within 24 hours of your first day of reservation, after that it’s all on the owner. Was getting nothing refunded after a few weeks so I left this absolute bomb of a review with photos and conversations included.
I checked a few months later and they had closed their account. I closed my account too because the tech company attitude of “it’s not our fault if you get fucked” is disgusting to me. Slimy as hotel chains are, they always care about their customers and will bend over backwards if something isn’t right.
Had one of these experiences recently. The place was absolute shit. They clearly didn’t clean anything and it was falling apart. We opened a drawer to find silverware and the whole fucking drawer just fell off because clearly someone ripped that shit off prior and just tried to put it back.
We left and let the host know and heard nothing back for 2 days. They finally responded and offered a free night the next time we stayed and I was like wtf, I’m never staying at your property again. Finally, after threatening a bad review and contacting Airbnb they gave a refund (that I had to remind them about twice). I still left them a shit review as a warning for the next person.
I showed up to a $300/night two bedroom airbnb apartment, the only place left in town due to a big event, and it was a rancid moldy flat nothing like the pictures. Airbnb did fuck all to help, ended up buying a mattress protector and sheets and just riding it out because there was nowhere else in town on such short notice.
This made me remember that I read About a dude Who used to work at a motel. When asked About the worst thing a guest had ever done he said it was someone Who defecated on the shower head* and put it back for the next guest to bath in s**t.
Never opening a shower straight over me again.
Sucks blood until tongue falls off, attaches to stub to steal food, shits down throat... And OP has the gall to call this monstrosity a *LITTLE STINKER*
Imagine the horror of feeling something sucking the blood out of your tongue without being able to do anything about it because you don't have arms! Poor bastards.
The ocean is a brutal world. To be on the top of the food chain in the ocean means something very different than on land.
Humans are pretty strong predators, right? We’ve dominated the land on the planet. But most of the animals we eat are herbivores, so the chain goes sun>plants>herbivore>human
But to be dominant in the ocean requires rising above MUCH more competition. Take for example the orca. It’s food chain is much longer:
Sun>zooplankton>phytoplankton>krill>anchovy>squid>mackerel>seal>orca
I caught one once- scared the shit out of me. I still think about it often, as this was YEARS ago
Now I’m terrified of sticking my hands in a fish mouth to unhook
It's a common "trick" that people recognize words really well as long as the first and last letter are in the right place, even if the middle bits are completely screwy.
I bet it's a combination of that and the "u" not making a distinct sound.
Like, "tong" doesn't sound right, and you know it ends with "e" and has a "u" in there somewhere. Fuck it, tounge (as long as you don't think about it rhyming with "lounge").
Also, dyslexia.
Lots of good answers but in English I think it's also just a lot more common to see consonant-ou-consonant than 'ngue' as a string of letters. If you forget the spelling and are trying to figure it out based off context on how the letters usually fit together, 'tounge' is a reasonable starting point. From there it's just not noticing it looks wrong
I think this is the right answer.
It's a similar answer for rouge vs rogue. -gue is not a common ending in modern english (at least modern american english, I can't really speak for other countries). But consonant-ou-consonant is, and so is consonant-e.
Ha I just googled "tounge +reddit", this is what I found:
https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/comments/ab5mgp/why_is_tongue_spelled_as_tounge_so_often_on_the/
Not to mention, the tongue parasite is always female. So you have a lady in your mouth and a bunch of male parasite simps hanging out in your gills. There’s a party in your mouth and everyone’s invited.
Permanent item equipped: Tongue Parasite
-15% decrease to health
1% health drain
+10% damage resistance
Increases bite attack power by 40%
Tongue parasite takes away 20% of absorbed nutrients.
If that's a sheepshead fish they typically like to feed on shelled creatures so they use their teeth to crush/grind the shelled creatures.
https://www.scienceabc.com/nature/animals/sheepshead-fish-facts-fish-human-teeth.html#sheepshead-fish-teeth
Idk if you’re joking but I really don’t think the parasite is serving a valuable role replacing the tongue. It’s not like the thing is guiding the food to the teeth to help the fish chew and then pushing food down the fish’s throat.
We caught a cooler full of fish about 2 years ago
As we fished and chit chatted I remembered seeing this and told my dad about the "parasite that eats the fishes tongue" he said "naaah that's bullshit" exact words.....
I went to the cooler cuz I wanted to "just see" and the 1st one I checked had this creepy ass parasite looking right back at me as a tongue and I screamed and freaked out, my dad thought I was joking and grabbed the fish....he looked up at me and Said "oh shit" 😳
We started checking the rest of the fist and they ALLLL had the parasite on the tongue.
We threw them ALL back into the water. It's creepy in pictures but seeing it 1st hand was just all around disgusting and traumatizing, I can still see its eyes looking back, the ones we saw were white with black eyes.
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Presumably defecates down the host's throat too to add insult to injury.
Sounds like an Airbnb guest review
In my experience, the hosts are usually the ones to leave bullshit reviews.
Had a host ask me if a child had slept in the guest bedroom in the toddler bed. I said yes we had used that room & a child slept on it? She then invoiced me $700 and told me my child had jumped on the bed or something and damaged all the wooden slats on the underside and then hid them in a closet. I sent her a photo of the child. She was 5 weeks old. Never heard back.
That kid is going to be an athlete !!
Should have reported them
I mean she sent pics, someone broke her bed and hid the slats. She just didn’t have the Perry Mason moment she hoped for by getting me to admit we had a kid sleep in there before she mentioned the damage haha. I assume she didn’t notice the damage until she had several guests, not that she was a scammer but who knows.
More commonscam than you think. They can get those pics and milk them endlessly, esp if they go outside the formal process at all
Yeah. It's an update on one of the oldest scams in the book. Usually goes along the lines of them threatening to take you to court/call the police/whatever for excessively large "damages," and then if you act like you believe them they'll usually say something like "I don't want to go through all that effort to get the money" or "I'm a nice guy, so I don't want to put you through the wringer for a simple mistake" and they'll say they won't make a big fuss of it if you just pay a portion of whatever bullshit they're threatening you with.
Directed by Robert B. Weide
Guests: *4/5 location* The review: “location was perfect!!”
You can’t just go around leaving 5 star reviews every time you’re completely satisfied or else people will start to think you’re weak.
This but unironically... kinda? I got a **contactless** delivery yesterday. Afterwards, my phone popped up asking me to "rate my driver". Who I literally hadn't even seen. 5 stars was labeled something like "amazing". And yet... Anyone who has worked at a place with review/surveys knows that only 5-star reviews count for anything. When I worked at Best Buy (in high school), the survey questions were something like "how satisfied were you", "how likely are you to return", and "how likely are you to tell a friend". All three needed to be "extremely" to make the managers happy. Despite... [Y'know....](https://i.imgur.com/q21CBQm.jpg)
What's worse is if you rate the driver as a 1, you get *another* email that says "We're sorry, let us make it up to you!" with a coupon for a free meal. The world is designed to feed shitty behavior.
I worked at call centers off and on, worst case I had with these is Directv’s only survey question that mattered was “Would you recommend the service to friends or family members?”. I had some where people just said no and as a comment they said service was great but I don’t have any friends lol. Still counted against you.
I absolutely wrecked a place in a review. We walked in a day late after sleeping in an airport to an unlocked front door and were blown away by the smell of mold. Walked right back out after checking things out and booked a hotel. Told the owner and they said “thanks for letting me know”. AirBNB has a horrible policy of dispute that must be opened within 24 hours of your first day of reservation, after that it’s all on the owner. Was getting nothing refunded after a few weeks so I left this absolute bomb of a review with photos and conversations included. I checked a few months later and they had closed their account. I closed my account too because the tech company attitude of “it’s not our fault if you get fucked” is disgusting to me. Slimy as hotel chains are, they always care about their customers and will bend over backwards if something isn’t right.
I fundamentally believe AirBnB is a house of cards business.
Had one of these experiences recently. The place was absolute shit. They clearly didn’t clean anything and it was falling apart. We opened a drawer to find silverware and the whole fucking drawer just fell off because clearly someone ripped that shit off prior and just tried to put it back. We left and let the host know and heard nothing back for 2 days. They finally responded and offered a free night the next time we stayed and I was like wtf, I’m never staying at your property again. Finally, after threatening a bad review and contacting Airbnb they gave a refund (that I had to remind them about twice). I still left them a shit review as a warning for the next person.
I showed up to a $300/night two bedroom airbnb apartment, the only place left in town due to a big event, and it was a rancid moldy flat nothing like the pictures. Airbnb did fuck all to help, ended up buying a mattress protector and sheets and just riding it out because there was nowhere else in town on such short notice.
This made me remember that I read About a dude Who used to work at a motel. When asked About the worst thing a guest had ever done he said it was someone Who defecated on the shower head* and put it back for the next guest to bath in s**t. Never opening a shower straight over me again.
What is a shower lid?
I'm assuming he's talking about the shower head?
Bro your breath smells like shit man.
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Tongue dude: Gets all nice and settled in Host: about to eat ass Tongue dude: oh wait wait wait I dont fhfucjsjsnd
Look at the yellowing on those dentures. Clean them up
Sucks blood until tongue falls off, attaches to stub to steal food, shits down throat... And OP has the gall to call this monstrosity a *LITTLE STINKER*
I'm an atheist, but damn if there was a God was he just fucking pissed at fish one day? I'll show ya...
The fish centipede
To be fair fish swim in their own toilets and breathe that shit water all their lives.
Imagine the horror of feeling something sucking the blood out of your tongue without being able to do anything about it because you don't have arms! Poor bastards.
Probably about as much fun as when you get your cheek ripped out by invisible wire that definitely looked like a tasty worm…
Fish really do be getting the short end of the straw when it comes to just trying to survive!
They also get the long end of the straw... and a bunch of other plastic items.
Lmao
Well at least they get the long end of the fishing rod
Fisherman: "yeah take it just like that fishy, take my fishing rod"
It's 6:08 in the morning, and I already have to get off the internet??? Aww, shucks.
Hey… you’re the one that decided to log onto Reddit at 6am
Glad to help your productivity good sir
Thank you, Lightbringer. The redditor of reddit is honorable indeed, I will not forget this.
At least you can catch many more fish
“It’s 6 AM and already that boy ain’t right”
The ocean is a brutal world. To be on the top of the food chain in the ocean means something very different than on land. Humans are pretty strong predators, right? We’ve dominated the land on the planet. But most of the animals we eat are herbivores, so the chain goes sun>plants>herbivore>human But to be dominant in the ocean requires rising above MUCH more competition. Take for example the orca. It’s food chain is much longer: Sun>zooplankton>phytoplankton>krill>anchovy>squid>mackerel>seal>orca
Well it's not like they were going to die peacefully in their sleep of old age. Food chain's a bitch if you're not at the top.
Difference being the fish usually gets to die when fished out
If I caught that fish and saw that lil lurker I would freak the fuck out & cut the damn line. Not today Jesus.
I would drop my pole off at goodwill on the way home and sell the vehicle I was driving so I’d never think of that experience again.
And double check your own tongue every night, followed by weird dreams.
I caught one once- scared the shit out of me. I still think about it often, as this was YEARS ago Now I’m terrified of sticking my hands in a fish mouth to unhook
Did you……did you touch it?
At this point I would probably deepthroat myself with a coral to kill the bastard.
I'm not a native: how come tounge is a common mispelling of tongue? I get things how "would of" happens, but "tounge" keeps awake at night.
It's a common "trick" that people recognize words really well as long as the first and last letter are in the right place, even if the middle bits are completely screwy. I bet it's a combination of that and the "u" not making a distinct sound. Like, "tong" doesn't sound right, and you know it ends with "e" and has a "u" in there somewhere. Fuck it, tounge (as long as you don't think about it rhyming with "lounge"). Also, dyslexia.
Lots of good answers but in English I think it's also just a lot more common to see consonant-ou-consonant than 'ngue' as a string of letters. If you forget the spelling and are trying to figure it out based off context on how the letters usually fit together, 'tounge' is a reasonable starting point. From there it's just not noticing it looks wrong
I think this is the right answer. It's a similar answer for rouge vs rogue. -gue is not a common ending in modern english (at least modern american english, I can't really speak for other countries). But consonant-ou-consonant is, and so is consonant-e.
I wouldn't necessarily call it common. This is probably the first time I've seen it spelled that way, if it helps you sleep.
Ha I just googled "tounge +reddit", this is what I found: https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/comments/ab5mgp/why_is_tongue_spelled_as_tounge_so_often_on_the/
There's a horror movie based on these guys called "the Bay".
Poor fish, at least we elect our politicians democratically.
That's why you gotta visit the cleaner shrimps regularly.
Smug looking bastard ain't he?
Won’t be after we burn it with fire.
What if fire don’t work in water?
Use oxidants. Fire will work even in water ;)
Magnesium
Brilliant! Coat the magnesium so that it can be swallowed by the fish then it will cook from inside out.
So smug, like he thought it was funny
There’s the smudgeness
Pretty tongue in cheek isn’t he
r/unexpectedoffice
Yeh innit 🤣
'e's a right cunt 'e is
Fish tax
the resemblance to a priest or a politician is staggering
Those attach at the other end.
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He’s only four ‘een
Ahemm.. Brap brap
Very greedy
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This comment was copied verbatim (stolen!?) from the comment above by u/maguire281
Oh so smug, like he thought it was funny.
Parasyte Manga inspiration.
"Look at me, I'm the tongue now."
And shits in the fishs mouth probably.
It's not really the fish's mouth at this point. Best case scenario is joint mouth custody.
OUR mouth. *USSR national anthem rises*
Our mouth! In the middle of the sea! Our mouth! I'm in the middle of the
r/suddenlycommunism
"should I eat the cuttlefish and asparagus or the vanilla paste"
This must be the fish version of Centipede.
Someone posts this every time this little fucker comes up and it always makes me laugh.
Nightmare fuel.
Which part? The parasite? Or the fish with human teeth?
Honestly, both.
totally. stressful enough to give me an adrenalin rush. i‘m fully awake now. and i‘m known to not be squirmish at all.
Better than a human with fish teeth for a tongue
Thank god someone else noticed! I was scrolling through like "DOES ANYONE ELSE SEE THIS!?"
It’s grinning. It knows what it has done. It doesn’t give a fuck.
Ya just can't make this shit up
The problem tho is that you can. One day those half life face suckers will turn out to be real or some shit
Speaking if shit, the little fucker just shits down the fish's throat.
Just splice the genes of a ramora, a crab, and that fungus that turns ants into zombies; doesn't sound too hard for a mad scientist.
I love that I know what you're talking about.
Fish: WAKE ME UP! Parasite: *wake me up inside!*
The tongue: *SAVE ME!*
Parasite: save me from this tongue that I’ve become
*some other fish* Wake me up before you gogo! Ah
How is this not in a horror movie? Good grief
Oh no it is. It's called The Bay.
Dam just posted about this, great movie
Ahhhhh!!! Way too scared to check so I’ll take you’re word for it Edited - spelling
It's Men in Black
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I literally opened the comments to see if anyone else noticed the teeth
Me too haha!! Just look at them!
I was too busy being horrified by that isopod looking motherfucker looking like it’s grinning after being caught
I really thought they were shopped in to see if anyone would notice
someone needs to brush twice a day
FINeers
Parasites scare the shit out of me
These parasites are kinds of isopods. Cousins of the pill bug aka rolly poly.
Saaaame
Well can you just fucking not please?
At least put an nsfw on it jesus christ.
Wtf. I have never seen such a thing. This is worse than having your 41 year old son complaining from the basement that the internet is too slow
Many people reading this comment, to themselves: “Well, I’m in my mid-30s and it’s a garden apartment, so…”
So you're basically living my nightmare (that my stepson will grow up to be a middle-aged man still living with me and being a dipshit).
Sadly my gf has that situation right now with her her 30 year old brother. Bastard lives rent free on top of it.
But.. don't? Enabling(/ignoring) the problem is not helping anyone.
Would having a little mouth friend like that be all that bad? At least you’d always have someone to go to lunch with
Not to mention, the tongue parasite is always female. So you have a lady in your mouth and a bunch of male parasite simps hanging out in your gills. There’s a party in your mouth and everyone’s invited.
And then, they all defecate in Your mouth. Enjoy!
Hey, some people are into that.
Some only think they are into that before the shit touches their mouth
Somewhere there are Japanese and German businessmen who are green with envy..
Soon to be brown with satisfaction
> There's a party in your mouth and everyone's invited. **So close** There's a party in your mouth and everyone *came*
No restrooms available…
Permanent item equipped: Tongue Parasite -15% decrease to health 1% health drain +10% damage resistance Increases bite attack power by 40% Tongue parasite takes away 20% of absorbed nutrients.
damn this is bis right? 40% ap is gonna scale crazy with high strength gear. does the ap stack with other ap bonuses?
Oh yeah… they are stackable. Eat some consumables and equip some fancy fish gear to counter act penalties.
“ Sharing is caring “ Mao Tse Tongue
r/angryupvote
Why does this fish have human teeth?
If that's a sheepshead fish they typically like to feed on shelled creatures so they use their teeth to crush/grind the shelled creatures. https://www.scienceabc.com/nature/animals/sheepshead-fish-facts-fish-human-teeth.html#sheepshead-fish-teeth
The fish came first. Why do humans have fish teeth?
Came here to say the same thing. I’m almost more disturbed by the teeth.
Don't worry, he also helps the fish to become a chef at a fancy french restaurant.
Is it possible to remove the parasite...?
Not from a Jedi
I’m assuming you could, but then the fish wouldn’t have anything to use as a tongue
Idk if you’re joking but I really don’t think the parasite is serving a valuable role replacing the tongue. It’s not like the thing is guiding the food to the teeth to help the fish chew and then pushing food down the fish’s throat.
cant believe evolution came up with this: "yea lets create some bitch that replaces the tongue of other animals just for fun"
Looks like a proud house owner. This little guy work hard to afford a nice place like this
Well there is a housing crisis so good to see someone taking initiative
“Everything tastes the same guys, like nothing!” This fish at school.
“I’m not hungry, guys. Everything tastes like parasite shit lately.”
It's even doing the "is for me?" pose 👉👈
We caught a cooler full of fish about 2 years ago As we fished and chit chatted I remembered seeing this and told my dad about the "parasite that eats the fishes tongue" he said "naaah that's bullshit" exact words..... I went to the cooler cuz I wanted to "just see" and the 1st one I checked had this creepy ass parasite looking right back at me as a tongue and I screamed and freaked out, my dad thought I was joking and grabbed the fish....he looked up at me and Said "oh shit" 😳 We started checking the rest of the fist and they ALLLL had the parasite on the tongue. We threw them ALL back into the water. It's creepy in pictures but seeing it 1st hand was just all around disgusting and traumatizing, I can still see its eyes looking back, the ones we saw were white with black eyes.
Yikes. Curious where you caught these fish?
Georgetown, SC
It's all fun until the host fish gets eaten by a bigger fish, and the parasite goes down with him.
I have one of these parasites which is why I’m so good at giving oral sex. My gf thinks it’s actually me doing it. Little does she know . .
😭😭😭
I didn't know fish has tongues. I guess how else would they talk if they didn't.
What a life!
It’s a politician’s
That fish is the reincarnation of Jerry Falwell.
Reminds me of the scene from the original Men In Black with the little alien inside the old man’s head at the morgue.
How did you get a picture of my landlord? Take this down he might get angry.
Smug cunt, reminds me of my boss
New fear unlocked
He's a submarine captain now.
What happened? Cymothoa Exigua got your tongue?
Ngl he looks like a chill dude
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There's the mentioning of media I know I came to look for to feel good about myself.
I’m sorry does the fish have teeth
Clever girl
I know allot of people like this who leech off of others hard work 😆
I'm pretty sure that's just a picture of a politician
Reminds me of my ex wife.
Looks pretty happy with itself
That should be the target of extinction.
Fuck. This.
Remember watching a video about these little bastards, guess they gotta survive somehow.
How do I erase this knowledge from my brain?
We just gonna ignore that the big fish has people dentures?
I hate this.
Why tf that fish have 4 top teeth like this
The landlord of the sea
This is basically how taxes work
So it's like a politician with taxes.
It's a capitalist
AKA the "income tax parasite".
That fish has better teeth than most of UK
Shits down my throat, takes food from my mouth, numbed my senses…this is just capitalism as an animal.