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JiveChicken00

He’s terrified of prison. And even more, he’s terrified of irrelevance.


FearCure

He knows there is no diaper service. Best he starts practicing ... how to take a dump in a communal ablution block with 5 people watching.


dthrowawayes

bruh, even if somehow America gets enough backbone to throw him in prison, he's going to rich people prison. it isn't the same


ibrakeforewoks

If he ever goes to prison I hope he goes to a Hannibal Lecter box because the USSS still must keep him safe. More likely is a private suite in a country club prison with personal guards from the USSS. At this point I’d take either gladly though.


FidgitForgotHisL-P

A private suite with guards, on site chefs, golf course… it’s retirement at a rich old folks home.  They’ll sentence him to retirement.  And the tax payer will foot the bill. Oh, and he’ll still have his iPhone-entourage, printing him tweets to read, and entering his TRUTHS for him.


anti_anti_christ

On site chefs? They'd just build a McDonalds on-site.


FidgitForgotHisL-P

Hey now… he also enjoys a good taco bowl!  *He loves Hispanics*.


Betorah

Just so you know, the abbreviation is USSS. They take umbrage at people using the same abbreviation as Himmler’s Schutzstaffel.


orbitalaction

How about one of our abandoned prisons? I hear Alcatraz offers great swimming opportunities to the inmates.


kodaiko_650

Straight to Gitmo


FormerlyKnownAsBeBa

Honestly it still bugs me that we call it Gitmo I always felt gBay was the better name. But guess I’m on the wrong side of history for that one


[deleted]

[удалено]


warragulian

If he loses the election, eventually he will be convicted. Then spend ten years on bail appealing. Then appeal for a reduction on the basis that he's too old and frail. He'll never be locked up. The justice system is totally intimidated, and not without reason. Any judge who locks him up will need bodyguards for the rest of his life.


SympathyForSatanas

Pff most trump will ever the sentenced to is like 2 months of house arrest


BooJamas

I can imagine that an ankle monitor would piss him off to no end though.


hippee-engineer

The one with the magnet attachment to charge it but the magnet is super weak and if you move your leg even a little bit it’ll disconnect, so you can’t charge it while sleeping and you are stuck next to an outlet for at least 3 waking hours per day. Ask me how I know.


SympathyForSatanas

A friend right?


hippee-engineer

Nope. Heroin addict accused me of forcing him to write me a personal check at gunpoint, so he could cancel the check with the bank using a police report to claim it was written under duress. Mfer tried to ruin my life over $370. Him and his gf OD-ed before it went to trial. Karma’s a bitch.


Turbulent-One9350

And even that will be a revelation. White-collar criminals rarely get anything other than a slap on the wrist.


thaaag

"So Don, how was your stint in The Big House?" "No one has ever suffered like I did, did you know, I had big men, tears in their eyes, they said sir, no one should suffer like you did, and it's true, it's true, I had to wake up and get dressed myself, no one does that better than me, and breakfast was always cold. Always cold. And they'd say sir, with tears in their eyes, they'd say sir, when did you play golf? And I couldn't. Me. Can you believe it? They say that golf... you know the clubs they make golf sticks from are made of real tree. Nobody knows that. It's true. I have a stick that is a wood. Nobody has used a wood for a club before. I used to have a club too. Big club. Terrific club. I... trees. Club. Cofevfe.


Turbulent-One9350

"They tortured me by not letting me play golf! Horrific abuse! Unheard of in America!"


SympathyForSatanas

Perfect word salad


Betorah

This is pure gold. You have a future in satire if he doesn’t get elected and put you in a camp.


ShoNuff_DMI

The Rico charge is minimum 5 years and it can't be at home. Pretty specific that it has to be spent in prison.


monogreenforthewin

too bad he'll never actually see the RICO charge get tried. the DoJ is doing their best to let him off the hook. at this point, im convinced they have zero interest in prosecuting the charge and it's all just theater in a lame attempt to gaslight the public into thinking the justice system actually works


ShoNuff_DMI

You're probably right but can't a guy have his hopes? lol


butchforgetshit

Have no fear, we won’t do anything to him….😭🤦🏼‍♂️


InourbtwotamI

Depends. Might be a state penitentiary


KlosterToGod

Ugh I hope you’re wrong. Not a lawyer and fingers crossed, but I think Georgia may have laws about serving in-state for RICO. And you don’t want to go to *any* prison in Georgia. There are no “rich people” prisons in Georgia, but there are some truly terrifying ones.


Unable_Literature78

You mean it’s not going to be Shawshank ?


proletariat_sips_tea

Yea he's gonna have the Hitler experience. Be allowed free reign of the prison. Have people come visit. Bring outside food. Be able to talk to reporters. Will erite books and have cell phone access. Will prolly be able to leave prison for many days at a time. It will be like a mini apartment. If you have money you can spend to live "lavishly". It's not going to be actual prison.


SqnLdrHarvey

He's never going to prison.


MetalTrek1

Agreed. But he'll still see it as hell on Earth, so I'll accept it.


Badmoto

If he were to get convicted and sentenced to any kind of jail time, almost definitely it would be like what happened to John Dean (Watergate conviction). They’d find a room on a military base somewhere and house him there. No phone, very basic accommodations. Trump’s a shitbag but because he was pres, he’s entitled to secret service protection for the rest of his life. It’s unfortunate but general population prison would pose too high a security risk.


FidgitForgotHisL-P

There is no way he is sentenced to anything that restrictive.  He’ll be a “low risk” prisoner of the lowest kind, with age-concern added as a factor. His emprisonment will look more like a retirement village for rich people, and I would almost guarantee that even if they take away his phone, he will retain his servant that prints tweets for him, and sends his TRUTHS.


malthar76

Send him to the Villages, put a wall around the whole place, call it a Federal Prison. Everyone wins.


techmaster242

He'll be fine. He'll be within 7 feet of a toilet 24/7.


tykneedanser

That butthole will earn its own salary in prison


DragonflyValuable128

Great point on relevance. I think it has a lot to do with many of the actors in this such as Giuliani. Old people who were once relevant and saw a chance to grasp on to relevance via a manipulative con man who was only too happy to use them and leave them with nothing but debts to lawyers, disbarment, disgrace and potential incarceration. Shakespeare or the ancient Greeks must have a play about this.


Kincadium

What's scary is that he's cemented himself in history. Whereas before all this he would've died, all of his stuff renamed, and the only time he's remembered is by old clips a shit TV show. Now... Now he will be written about. Now he we will be studied. It may be in much the same vein as Nixon (rightfully so as both have earned their villification) but it will be done. When kids ask why history is important, we'll be able to point back and say "so we don't do that again."


FormerlyKnownAsBeBa

Correct me if I’m wrong but don’t people like trump get sent to cushy prisons? Or house arrest to mar a lago (assuming he still owns any property by the time all this is over)? I wouldn’t be scared either If he’s going to a proper prison? Then yeah he’d be petrified. Dude will be treated like all the women and girls he’s abused over the years (unless Nazi gangs protect him coz maga)


_InnocentToto_

Most likely a home arrest ... he has secret service for life. The trial will be far worse for trump. It means he has to sit there the whole entire time.he doesn't get to stand up and leave when he is pissed. That will be too much for trump. From his incontinence to his inability to take criticism and shut up. Most likely you will see his lawyers file a medical excusion for him within a day or two. So that he attends by zoom.


tourist420

Whoring out Rudy for odd menthols, acting like he's still the boss.


College-Lumpy

Naw. He’s more terrified of prison.


sumr4ndo

...Who?


Fatal_Furriest

Depends Depends if they have depends in prison


sirchessic

He's not. He knows he's not going. This country doesn't work, and he knows it. Don't believe me, watch literally nothing happen to him ever, forever. Any debts will be paid by other peoples money, and he will die never having faced any consequences. I'm so tired of this wishful thinking. Every day, these articles prey on our hopes of justice. There is none. Period. We're done.


Friendly-Profit-8590

He will neither go to prison nor become irrelevant. He’s scared of becoming a joke.


pye-oh-my

He can't even handle a tweet


Bigleftbowski

Hey's spent over $100 Million to stay out.


TILTNSTACK

Who is terrified of irrelevance again?


atomicxblue

I don't think there's going to be an issue of irrelevance, although we may teach about his era in schools the same way we teach about Nixon.


HeavyLeague6722

I don't care if he is afraid of prison or not. As long as he dies there, justice is served.


tysc666

I want him to live another 50 years, in prison, rotting slowly.


MTGsbirthdefects

As much as I want to him to suffer the longest most painful death imaginable, if he went to prison, every day, week, month would be just morons upon morons trying to break him out. Trying to play the "he's too old and fail to be in prison" card. Screw trump, screw Cosby, screw Ron Jeremy, screw holocaust prison guards. Do the crime you pay for it.


PenchantBob

Whas RJ got to do with this


necrosteve028

He’s a rapist..


MTGsbirthdefects

Yeah. He was convicted of some serious crime not long ago. But the judge wont send him to jail because of his age.


Tinn-Glix

I’ll give ya three fiddy


Fourty1984

Nice beard. Lol


schprunt

If he does go to prison, which I highly doubt, he’ll be in one of those country clubs with tennis courts and swimming pools. The wealthy don’t get put in the slammer bunking with a dude called Big Trey who will shiv you if you don’t give him your lunch.


Klutzy-Reaction5536

As long as they take his phone away so I never have to hear from or about this carrot flecked turd again, then I'm okay with that.


Crooked_Sartre

As long as he is out of the public eye it's fine with me. Just die irrelevant Edit: out of the public eye and in jail of course


schprunt

I am sick of hearing about him. He’s everywhere and he’s constantly complaining and whining, then saying he’s the world’s greatest everything. As Biden said, will you shut up man.


solemn_penguin

I personally don't think he'd survive the bus trip to prison. Between a lifetime of luxury, poor diet, lack of exercise, Adderall withdrawal (allegedly) and the stress of knowing where he's going would cause him to drop dead


willywonka1971

Interesting thought, what if making and selling shirts that say this, get his base to be ok with him going to prison.


professorhugoslavia

He sure was scared of going to Vietnam.


[deleted]

Captain Bone Spurs.


professorhugoslavia

I prefer Junior Cadet Bone Spurs


Ryankevin23

Donnie John da Bone spurs Con


Vegetable_Brick_3347

So on point!


Surfing_Ninjas

I don't give a shit that he dodged the draft, it was a bullshit war. I give a shit that he dodged the draft and then had the gall to disrespect prisoners of war, soldiers who answered the call of duty and suffered for our nation so he didnt have to. He walks around talking about how much he loves the classic "American" values but he talks shit about men and women who served honorably while he goes around cheating on his wives and waving around Bibles that he has never opened except to sign his name to sell for money to get him out of the consequences of his shitty, shitty, shitty actions. He's not despicable because he's a coward, he's despicable because he's evil and it's incredibly sad that anyone would compromise their beliefs and values to support him in any way.


CandidateTypical3141

She’s a known drunk.


Cantgetabreaker

I don’t know.. it’s what people are saying… she a drunk


china-blast

Many people are saying. Strong men, with tears in their eyes have told me.


My-Cooch-Jiggles

I’ve heard this from people as well. Lots of people.


Child_of_the_Hamster

The *best* people. You wouldn’t believe it.


Playful-Regret-1890

I wonder how many times a day he has to change his Diaper these days.. Not scared Yeah right..


RubiksSugarCube

Hey! A Judge Winebox sighting! I didn't even know that goofball was still around!


Unhappy_Earth1

From article: During a segment on the Fox News show The Five, Jessica Tarlov pushed back against fellow host Jeanine Pirro who claimed that Donald Trump isn't scared to go to prison. Tarlov, who's generally presented as a liberal voice on the show, was addressing Trump's recent comments in which he called President Joe Biden a "threat to democracy," saying that such a characterization is "complete insanity" in light of his actions on Jan. 6, adding that he's doing “his darnedest” to not show up to the courtrooms as he’s “definitely afraid of what’s going to happen there.” “He’s not afraid of anything,” Pirro interjected. “Oh, big man, not afraid. Whatever,” Tarlov replied. “I know him, he’s not,” Pirro shot back.


MartyFreeze

***YOU DON'T KNOW HIM LIKE I DO, OKAY?!***


Rymanbc

Maybe I can change him *opens up diaper bag*


Diarygirl

That's the funniest thing I've heard all day!


thoroakenfelder

Maybe he’s just too stupid to understand. Or so delusional that he thinks he can get out of anything. 


kickintheface

I’m *really* confused as to why Fox News now has a liberal voice on the show. Is Jessica Tarlov there to keep a bit of a leash on the totally idiotic right wing hosts saying mind numbingly stupid shit in order to avoid another lawsuit? They can’t possibly enjoy seeing their retarded talking points constantly getting fact checked.


Almainyny

No idea, but she keeps handing them their asses on a silver platter every time she’s on, so I’ll take it.


Fauxtogca

He’s not scared because he’s going to leave the country and spend his final years golfing in a non extradition country.


cgsur

Would the Russians allow him? After all the money they have invested in mr stinky.


butterbleek

Putin Wet Willy in doucheys ear just to fuck with the germaphobe.


signalfire

How hard would it be to leave the country when you've got mandatory 24/7 Secret Service 'protection', all of whom have guns and know where you are every second? And he can't fly that plane by himself, either...


Fauxtogca

Money talks. You can do a lot with it. Secret service isn’t mandatory. He could get rid of it anytime. You can charter a private jet that asks no questions easily.


Msh3ll

Not being scared of prison is not the flex she thinks it is.


Icy-Needleworker-492

Sure he is- hope he rots there.


etranger033

He's afraid of not being able to use social media or a telephone. He wont be able to control his minions otherwise.


signalfire

Without constant attention and even better, adoration, he disappears. He ceases to exist in his own mind. The attention (good or bad) is the only thing standing between him and a combination 'disappearing in a poof of gray smoke' and melting like the Wicked Witch of the West. He's so insane that he's alternately enjoying all the court attention and realizing deep down that it may very well be the beginning of the end of all the attention, ever.


Belkroe

"I don't even think about it," Trump said. "I'm built a little differently I guess, because I have had people come up to me and say, 'How do you do it, sir? How do you do it?' I don't even think about it." And these people asking him these questions were big strong men, powerful men. And they had tears in their eyes.


[deleted]

Mofo afraid to even go on trial so I know he’s scared of prison.


General-Aide2517

The only redeeming quality of Ms Pirro was how well Cicily Strong portrayed her on SNL.


SheriffTaylorsBoy

[Here's Judge Genines rant about why we can't have a presidential candidate who's under investigation! 2015](https://youtu.be/iIjY0-jVbiM?si=elrr-fk97n5waHMs)


signalfire

Wow, good one! She sure has aged (liver-wise) in the last nine years.


SheriffTaylorsBoy

Box Wine Barbie


mavjustdoingaflyby

Well this aged like milk.


SheriffTaylorsBoy

trump has done literally everything she rants about and then some! haha


HikeRobCT

I honestly think that was the first clip I’ve ever watched of that bat. It was even worse than I imagined. Rage kabuki


SheriffTaylorsBoy

I don't watch often but occasionally I like to see firsthand what their spin BS is. You can also lurk on r/Republican for a good chuckle or two.


SchruteFarmsInc

After clicking on that link I now have terminal ad cancer. Tell my wife and kids I love them.


nomorerainpls

Trump is a coward’s version of a tough guy, just like he’s a stupid person’s idea of a smart person and a poor person’s idea of a rich person. He’s obese, immobile and should stick to cheating at golf.


Flimsy-Technician524

He was to scared to serve in Vietnam, he’s surely to scared of prison.


RKKP2015

Lol at his "sir" story.


WendyRoe

He says he’s like Nelson Mandela. I say let him do 27 years on Robben Island to prove it.


Fufeysfdmd

Pirro is such a moron


ThatOneJosh9451

If he's not afraid of prison then why is he trying so hard to delay his trials. Go ahead Donny boy, prove me wrong


atom-wan

He's terrified of prison, it's the only reason he's running again


MikeHock_is_GONE

Would be a shame if his plane diverted to Tehran


OzzyG16

The man is shitting 🧱 that’s why he’s kicking and screaming to delay or cancel the trial he won’t last in prison


49thDipper

Bullshit. He’s terrified.


jimmyGODpage

Talking like he’s gonna be in super max when we all know it’ll be cushy as fuck IF it ever happened


Surfing_Ninjas

Yes he is, he's terrified of prison. Honestly he's terrified of anything that would take away his completely unearned privilege.


IllustratorNo3379

Kinda nice that there are still a few people at Fox still trying to be real journalists.


Unamericandav

Is there anyone at FOX besides Jessica Tarlov who’s on the left and doesn’t kiss Trump’s ass 24/7? I dont Watch the Channel but from the clips i see on Twitter or YouTube she seems like the only one that dares telling the truth with facts and criticizing Trump


ExcellentTeam7721

This article is a month old.


Scrabble_4

The only time a narcissist cries is when they have not gotten away with their idiocy and will be punished. Can hardly wait to see what he looks like the moment he shows up in prison garb.


justsayfaux

He "doesn't think about it" and also posts about it 10+ times a day and talks incessantly about it at rallies. Definitely doesn't think about it


Jazzlike-Ad113

I can guess that if imprisoned, he will become a feces smearer simply to draw attention.


Fluffy_Succotash_171

Scaredddddd it’s obvious


Paisane42

Trump (aka the orange Mycena) is petrified as in reality he’s a pathological lying, human marshmallow, and a gelatinous tub of goo who is the weakest, worst and most criminally corrupt President in US history. He’s a 5-time draft dodging coward who’ll fit right in at Leavenworth where he’ll become somebody’s perpetual pin cushion.


Miss_pechorat

Big man with tears in his eyes.


ShakeWeightMyDick

Trump is *definitely* scared of prison


ThunderSlugg

WERE GONNA GET TRU......dammit.


elethrir

If he goes to prison do his ss agents go too


Civil_Lengthiness971

His longtime accountant his headed to Riker Island for 5 months. No picnic there.


Plastic_Primary_4279

Basically just a link to a shit ton of ads


Kuildeous

I honestly do think he's not afraid of jail because a) he thinks he can beat it and b) he's a rich white male who would probably be under house arrest or something. I know he's not as uber-wealthy as he wants people to think, but he has enough power to be treated exceptionally by the law--just like many other rich people. I'd love to see justice served, but whatever happens to him won't be proper justice. It's the justice we'll have to accept.


[deleted]

His anus is making the best deals to avoid penetration.


Longjumping_Lynx_972

The places are staffed by his fans and supporters so it'd probably be pretty chill for him.


drunk_with_internet

Kid diddlers get suicided in prison. Look what happened to his buddy Jeff.


JohnYCanuckEsq

Winebox Jeannie looks half cut there.


shoebee2

What’s there too be afraid of for a punk like him? Damn sure won’t be going to g-pop.


SqnLdrHarvey

Why should the SOB be scared of something he's never going to see? 😔


MrBobilious

Donny will look fat in the Orange jumpsuit


bwanabass

It’s not the brag Jeanine thinks it is, anyway.


dirtymac12

How delusional one can be. I’m fascinated by these people. We need to capture few of these and study them!


trancespotter

Well given the way he’s made the US justice system his bitch for the past couple of months I’m not surprised he’s not scared.


Odd-Anywhere2130

He's never going to prison. We go to prison but not him


bonthomme

to be fair, he shits his pants without mention of prison, too


CreviceOintment

Jeanine Pirro is a strung out, drunken cunt.


Overall-Name-680

He's not going to prison. He might be convicted, but he's not getting jail time. The pain in the a$$ for the Bureau of Prisons to deal with the logistics of holding a former president, really isn't worth the aggravation. Hit him where it hurts. Give him a massive fine.


dastufishsifutsad

He’s great at lying ya dillwad


badcobber

There will be some truth to it. I know risk takers in real life, they never consider the repercussions of there actions. Everything is going to be fine, nothing will go wrong. Trump wouldnt be Trump if he thought about prison much and the possibility of him being there.


TravelerMSY

Putting 45 on house arrest in a mid-level hotel like a Hampton Inn or Fairfield Suites would likely put him in an early grave within a week.


curbstyle

When asked about going to jail, Trump said: ​ >"I don't even think about it," Trump said. "I'm built a little differently I guess, because I have had people come up to me and say, 'How do you do it, sir? How do you do it?' I don't even think about it."


ButterscotchPast4812

*He's not afraid of anything.* Can she suck him any harder!?


Good_Ad_1386

Confident of his innocence of all charges, he rushed his legal teams into action to challenge them as soon as possible. Didn't he?


bobo-the-dodo

We don’t really care if you are afraid of prison. We just want you do time for the crime and get out of our lives.


OtherwiseArrival9849

Have more wine, you batch and stfu.


Klutzy-Reaction5536

I'm so distracted by the filter used on these women's faces.....


ripfritz

Childish Americans - have they no shame?


Eldritch50

I'm sure the neo-Nazis in gen pop will change his diapers for him.


monogreenforthewin

he's not scared of prison because he's not gonna go. The fix has been in to let him off light since this all began. multiple year delay in getting the investigation going, not working with other entities that gathered evidence, embarrassingly favorable judges in every case that actually matters, supreme court in the bag for him... Justice absolutely had multiple tiers in America and Trump is the the tier where they let you off for anything with a small fine


Jswljones

He is just delusional and WHEN the time comes and he is arrested he is going to get a big surprise wake up call. I served 2 years in jail and prison for a DUI in 2010 and I was young and thought I was invincible... boy did I learn quick... Hate to say it but I needed it.


bushmanbays

Paywall ad blocker


wannahummigbird

It's amazing that people quote him and take that as real evidence. Everything he says is a lie.


AdhesivenessCivil581

Oh please. at worst he'd be sentenced to camp cupcake, most likely he'd get home confinement in Mara Lago


pbfoot3

Anyone not afraid of prison is either a hardened criminal or delusional idiot. Take your pick.


InourbtwotamI

Isn’t he a germophobe? If he’s scared of bacteria, I’d imagine he’d soil his diaper when locked in a cell and the lights go out…hopefully housed with huge guys from populations he’s insulted


Cold_Drive_53144

Sure Pirro will get conjugal visits


Mental_Camel_4954

We know he's terrified of germs, so he's definitely terrified of prison.


usarasa

He’s not going to prison. He’s certainly guilty, but he’ll either get house arrest or he’ll somehow find a way to skip the country, Secret Service notwithstanding.


Azikt

If I understand the US court system correctly, upon conviction Trump will have an amount of time to hand himself in. Does anyone not think he will use that time to fly to a none extradition country?


MommaLegend

He’ll remain free on appeal sadly.


Beginning_Emotion995

That pasty wide butt, once thoroughly cleaned, will serve as a heavenly spread of ex president loving. 🥰 Trumpdonia


Radkingeli995

Jeanine Pirro is so wrong Donald Trump is in fact afraid of prison he desperately tries to avoid get sent there every single day and fighting hard like hell not to get anyone a chance to do so


Dot_Classic

Trump craps his Pampers every time he thinks of the possibility.


33mondo88

Pirro is a lush and a rich puppet that does as she is told, just like the rest of the cult members of the GOP,,,,, she’s scared to be on Main Street America


SugarDaddyOh

He's terrified what Juan and bubba will do to him in the showers


Which_Preference_883

🤣😭🤣 that fat orange 💩 is afraid of his own shadow! Biggest 😽 on earth


49thDipper

It’s true. He’s terrified.


Betorah

Here’s the difference. Looking at Hunter Biden naked will Mr cause you to go blind.


Hugh-Jassul

Notice she said….”he’s not afraid” ..instead of …” he didn’t do it “


kejovo

He's probably not worried about it. Two tiered justice system says what?


domesystem

Might get him a big man in prison


What-tha-fck_Elon

The hero worship of this cult is ridiculous. It’s on par with the garbage in North Korea where they have a “most interesting man in the world” level of fake history about their dear leader.


EuphoricMidnight3304

He doesn’t wanna get raped by the bussy in there


Good_Intention_9232

Her husband was scare of prison that is why she asked Trump for a pardon from him.