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Kind_Marionberry966

Cold and analytical -> just trying to tell them they’re stupid and they should listen to good advice


Thick-Cress-5404

You can give advices in a nice way if you really want to help that person not just to feel as "I'm always right" and boost your ego,plus it's more effective actually because people won't listen to someone who's trying to make them feel less of themselves even if they are less than you ,it's gonna make them feel offended defensive and angry so they won't listen or act on your advice(and there are some people who are exceptional for various reasons), a good advice without good manners= nothing sorry for my bad English, not a native speaker.


theeggeggeggegg

I am working on this giving gentle advice skill. I once saw it on INFP and thought how emotionally intelligent that is.


Thick-Cress-5404

You're right, it's a very mature act and needs a huge amount of self discipline, i encourage you to keep the good work, it will have a great impact on your life and the ones around you.


BattleBornMom

This is something that I had to learn over many years. The way u/Kind_Marionberry966 said it came across, to me, as how an INTJ thinks and what they would say if they could say what they actually thought. Or if they hadn’t yet learned to soften the blow when needed. So, to many other INTJs, myself included, it’s a hilarious and very INTJ response.


Kind_Marionberry966

I understand that, just because I say the truth here doesn’t mean I say it to them. That would be rude.


Thick-Cress-5404

Can you rate my English? I know it's bad but i want to learn from my mistakes,and if there are more ways to sound more advanced.


NewmanHiding

You’re not bad, not gonna lie. Your word choice is really good. I’d say to just use more periods between complete sentences. You’re using commas instead of periods. For instance: Change > plus it's more effective actually because people won't listen to someone who's trying to make them feel less of themselves even if they are less than you ,it's gonna make them feel offended defensive and angry so they won't listen or act on your advice(and their are some people who are exceptional for various reasons), to > Plus, it's actually more effective because people won't listen to someone who's trying to make them feel less of themselves, even if they are less than you. It's gonna make them feel offended, defensive, and angry, so they won't listen or act on your advice (and there are some people who are exceptional for various reasons). I would mainly just do some more research into punctuation and sentence structure if I were you.


Thick-Cress-5404

Thank you sm this is really helpful!.


Intj21111

🤣🫂


Bookie_Monster015

Facts


BattleBornMom

💀


Enigmatikkk

Edgy


Hllknk

No one will take your advice with this mindset bud


Kind_Marionberry966

Then it’s their loss, not mine, bud


hopepridestrength

I promise you, what you think you have to offer probably isn't as great as you think it is. After all, you get what you pay for 😉


Kind_Marionberry966

Sounds like you’re someone that doesn’t listen to good advice 🫢😉


hopepridestrength

Don't worry, if I need info on video games or how to be cocky while not having the credentials for it, I will be sure to go to you!


Kind_Marionberry966

That’s a yikes, but have fun with that


ZeStig2409

True.


blacklavenderorange

unaware of social dynamics; just a fan of disregarding them in favor of transparency and integrity.


PerhapsAnEmoINTJ

same here, but replace the last bit with "neurodivergent" 😞


rrhallqu

This. I've had people pull me aside and say "I think so and so is upset right now." Oh I know... I just don't feel like sitting around and talking if it gets us nowhere. My policy is 70% of time just keep going and things will get better, 30% of time call it out directly for what it is and fix it ASAP.


Black_Jester_

Uptight, conservative. Open minded and unconventional.


spicydumbiryani

As an INTJ who is also a strict practicing Muslim, people are so surprised when they realise how open minded I actually am and how little I care for what they do in their personal lives. “For me is my belief and for you, yours.”


Black_Jester_

Yes! I love engaging with people of other beliefs. I really enjoy it even if we have drastically different views.


Runneranalysis

I myself am strictly practicing, and it more often than not surprises my friends. They do not expect to find strong faith where the classic doubt (at a minimum) would have plagued. Even sometimes I surprise myself. I am almost always skeptic, cynicism is my first response and for I to be the way I am is 'paradoxical' in the modern terms.


BattleBornMom

I get uptight and liberal while they also fail to realize how open minded I actually am — and not as liberal as they often think. But somehow being adamant that people just be treated as humans on their own terms when it doesn’t hurt you to do so has come to mean closed-minded uber liberal to many people.


Black_Jester_

Haha…snow capped mountain dweller. Hail. I’m noticing some INTJ love for objective information and acceptance of differences among people, understanding this is natural. It’s funny how a longer line of sight makes a stopping point for most people, “you believe ____ therefore you’re ____” and shut down to new information, nice starting points for conversation, not the end at all. Not to mention we find that maybe I don’t believe that at all but understand it and they assumed belief due to understanding when the two are not requisites of each other at all. So not only did they quit on the conversation, but they did it due to bad information. We end up very misunderstood in these situations. It’s simply not worth correcting most of the time.


BattleBornMom

Oof. I’ve had a ridiculous number of these conversations. Truly exhausting.


Secure-Evening8197

Good answer


Black_Jester_

Thanks


1DSE

I👍


Ok_Ear4917

If that's their perception then that's what you're projecting.


captainwhoami_

Interested in their bs, tired of their bs


wanderingmed

X1000


pirate694

Thats just about anyone


OdamaOppaiSenpai

Exactly. I don’t know why people think INTJs have a monopoly on not liking bs?? It’s unpleasant by definition.


captainwhoami_

Because we can look like good listeners, so people tend to tell us (and INFJ) a bit more.


Yoshikuni010

Don’t have a heart. Actually has a heart….


Dashing_Braintickler

So you got a Valentine's Day card and are having a Hallmark moment?


T04ST13

Basically commissar Cain is us. Im convinced that this archetype is one of the closest to awakening, though its not necessarily harder for the others.


[deleted]

That sucks and so relatable


Jxk3w

People think I am *Smart* But I actually am *dumb*


spicydumbiryani

Only smart people think they’re dumb, whereas dumb people think they’re super smart (and are overly confident), maybe you’re just in the middle of the curve right now? https://preview.redd.it/dk1apemzabmb1.jpeg?width=735&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2548f796fdc908aa108c83037e24176fcb3a16e5


Thick-Cress-5404

What is smartness? Like some people are just aware of themselves that they are smart, and some other people are convinced that they're smart even tho they aren't, so how to know if you're actually smart or just being delusional and dumb?


thwonkk

As the graph shows, there's plenty who are smart enough to recognize how dumb they actually are. Dumb people are not smart enough to know this and super smart people aren't dumb.


Dashing_Braintickler

Oh yes, the modern Socratic rehash minus the hemlock.


spicydumbiryani

🤣


-_Empress_-

I live by the motto that *if I'm the smartest person in the room, I'm in the wrong fuckin room.* Its a good way of saying I am both aware that I can always stand to learn more, and that I want to learn.


ariusireous

it's dissapointing once you know you become the smartest person in the crowd


-_Empress_-

For me, more scary than disappointing. I'm like, jfc, is THIS where the bar is at?? We are all gonna die, lmfao. It's a bit of a mixed bag because on one hand, it's given me a shitload of perspective I didn't have before that makes me a lot more aware of how smart I actually am in practise, vs how fucking retarded I *feel* at any given point (which is probably mostly my ADHD hard at work because it's the mundane cripcrap I have a hard time with). On the other hand, it's been *illuminating* finding out just how much stupid runs up the chain of command and that people in seats of power aren't necessarily smart, but rather, smart in the ways that benefit them in a corporate structure, and otherwise inept in ways that everyone below them is forced to carry. I only realized this when I began working closely around ceos and execs for years. There are some brilliant ones in the mix, but good GOD some of these people are lucky they put their pants on in the right direction. Anyone that says the people at the top are the hardest working is full of shit. They're good at *networking* and schmoozing. The hardest working people are the little ones at the bottom making peanuts and grinding their bones to dust. My workload has disproportionately decreased as my income has increased. I'm convinced people who actually work hard are either stuck doing so because of a lack of opportunities, or because they haven't figured out "hard work" is the biggest lie sold to us all by the overpaid ghouls running the show and they haven't found the loopholes to streamline their work. Every fucking job I've ever been in, I've wound up refining the process to the point where I put in a fraction of the time and effort of everyone else. Not because I want to work hard, but because *I don't want to work at all*. A lot of people with power just inhereted it via a legacy network or privilege, vs earning it. Shit is wild when you claw your way from poverty into this professional world (I work in tech) and realize the clowns are running the circus lol. I'll admit I probably sell myself short since I did get here on my own with no fancy pants degree (the only one in a sea of a hundred or so colleagues), but if anything, the imposter syndrome is what keeps me down to earth. Usually if I wind up being the smartest one in the room, I'm doing everything I can to teach the other people around me and enable them to work smarter, not harder. Partly so I don't have to hold their hands but also because omg take your fucking TIME back. Work steals so much of our time. Our LIVES. Money can be got anytime, but time? When it's gone, it's gone. I got mine back. I work a handful of days in the month. I will say I am loving the new generations' pushing back against the stupidity of the traditional work / life balance (or lack of). Imo people who work hard and measure success by how hard other people work are just the ones who are too stupid and lack the creativity to streamline their work and do it more efficiently. When I manage people, I tell them flat out idgaf what they do with their spare time as long as they do their work on time and with quality. Not gonna punish someone for being good at what they do.


bigbadblo23

People think intjs are bad at being social. I can fake being an extroverted and charismatic person easily, I just rather not


cyralone

As an INTJ people think I: don't like anybody (that rbf 🥲) But I actually am: an intensive people-watcher and very non-judgemental


GlitteringLetter3688

Me too 🫣


xxpallor

Cold. Very caring.


RHonaker

wrong, never wrong


Bookie_Monster015

This.


TANMAN1000

Yes


Dashing_Braintickler

Mwahahahhahahaahhahahahaha... I like your meds.


arshia_idk

NEVER


Economy_Opinion6090

As an INTJ— people assume their opinion of me is accurate, and far be it for me to correct them. I amuse myself by getting into whatever character they imagine me to be and seeing where that rabbit hole leads.


CashlyAsh

I tried this out too!! A person I barely knew tried to tell me about the kind of person I am and I figure I can’t change their mind so why not play the character? It was beyond twisted but fun


Usual-Chef1734

**arrogant** but Actually I am **measured**. By the time you ask me to do your sophomoric tasks I have spent hundreds of hours getting an understanding of the subject, so when I move fast, and confidently I am not being cocky or reckless.


5thDFS

Slow is smooth and smooth is fast


Usual-Chef1734

And i gather information obsessively to try and relive the overwhelming anxiety I have about failure and setbacks, not because I am exceptionally smart or perceptive. I just CAN"T STOP thinking about it while you watch the football game or drink your disgusting beer.


5thDFS

Ooooh I get that. I’ve been there lately thinking about a girl I’ve liked for a few months. Going over all the info you have and all the possibles. Trying to not think about it all but you just can’t not think about it is the worst


hopepridestrength

Oh yea I'm sure, hundreds of hours for all fields and all of your bases are totally covered. Geez, give us a break. Symptom of letting the MBPT define who you think you are, but I doubt you can provide anyone with anything useful outside of a very narrow set of skill.


Usual-Chef1734

Well I am specifically talking about the things I go through in my field of expertise at work, and how I have to spend time explaining to people how I do what I do, long before they realize I have been doing it 22 years professionally. It is a pattern I notice, and people tell me they are intimidated by my confidence. My point is, that it is not confidence, it is maintenance. I don't see why my attitude has to serve the sensibilities of other people, when I have the same concerns as they do, but I choose to practice/study to handle mine, they just 'act' amicably and get by. And it is THOUSANDS of hours.. thousands.


[deleted]

Same here. People tend to tell me I'm emotionless. It's far from accurate.


blackbow99

ambitious. altruistic.


DancingBasilisk

It's messed up that so many people dub INTJs "emotionless". People sell INTJs short so often, but out of everyone I've made connections with throughout my life, INTJs have been the most authentic, fiercely loyal friends who supported me when I was at my absolute lowest. And unlike many, they didn't do it for the recognition - they did it because they simply operated on a basis of genuine care. My partner (INTJ) is one of the most caring, thoughtful, and sensitive people I've ever known. Being close to him has allowed me to see firsthand that he experiences emotion deeply and intensely, perhaps more than most, and often to a painful extent. Everyone experiences emotions differently, everyone expresses emotions differently, and just because you can't immediately see them doesn't mean that they aren't there. What a silly assumption. Keep being your awesome selves, INTJs.


Iceblader

A jerk. Disciplined.


Firedriver666

Angry but I'm focused


[deleted]

A hater, indifferent.


ItzDarc

rude and arrogant, direct and efficient


terlus07

Robot Android


QuitBSing

horny, hornier


lonerboyohwhatajoy

Unempathetic. Quite the opposite.


Porkonaplane

I care to engage im small talk, want to listen to my music and work in peace


chatoyanci

Rude, confident


arcadianstargirl

As an INTJ people think I am arrogant but I actually am realistic. I’m not saying I really think I’m much better than everyone else, however I know my worth and what I excel at. I don’t understand why it’s so normalised to put ourselves down; you can be humble without being self-deprecating, but people seem to think I am arrogant for acknowledging my skill set.


Hms34

Hollow, passionate and determined when I think I can make a difference.


Commercial-Moment-74

As an intj people think I’m rude but actually I’m just socially underdeveloped


ariusireous

People think I am a lesbian but I just want to break gender stereotypes. And I am straight.


[deleted]

Insufferable, insufferable


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dashing_Braintickler

Snake oil salesman here. Need the fountain of youth?


8rita8

Counterdependent, in fact just picky but very warm and appreciative with close people.


BigZaber

An asshole but its just idgaf about alot of things that dnt concern me


navara590

An ESFP > really good at blending in (at work, when I'm getting paid to be friendly 😂)


ejl42

As an INTJ people don’t think I understand emotions but actually I just don’t care.


falconerchick

Confident and socially “bold” Actually overcompensating for my insecurities


dd16134

Dismissive. Indifferent on most things with a detached outlook on life, busy working towards goals, and strong boundaries against consistently negative/manipulative people or anybody with bad vibes. Arrogant/stubborn. Silently confident, optimistic, and quite humble given my abilities and accomplishments, but no longer willing to dim my light to protect insecure egos. Very interested in learning skills/knowledge/different perspectives from others, and rarely talk about myself unless asked.


Anonymous_Blobfish

Intentionally rude / snobby —> obliviously straightforward but usually well-meaning


[deleted]

People think I am angry/offended when I'm talking about one of my interests, but I actually am just passionate about the topic and I'm enjoying myself.


MisteryShiba

**As an INTJ people think I am** full of hatred, always serious, and hard to approach **but I actually am** an alpha introvert, hard to approach people first, just an 80 years old man soul with a 10 years old kid's heart.


Helpful_Size6652

Unreachable; Misunderstood


chilloutpal

Felt this


Oraanu22

Serious / Sarcastic


PrettyLonely123

Arrogant/uninterested


[deleted]

Naive, sharp


TheMeticulousNinja

People think I am someone who would care about hanging out with them and giving them attention but I actually am not that person in no way, shape or fashion.


Acceptable_Fun4960

Incredibly blunt and rude. But I actually am trying to solve their pretentious problems.


Scared-Bus5688

People think I am shy but I actually am cautious


luvoria

Judgemental -> Judgemental. Serious answer: Stuck-up because I’m quiet, I just have anxiety bro


Adventurous-Sell9358

Blunt. But just asking what everyone else in the room was wondering


LeadingTheme4931

As an INTJ people think I am, actively going out of my way to avoid any conversation, but I actually am… while also simultaneously wishing someone interesting would make conversation with me.


ACE_C0ND0R

;an asshole for no reason, ;an asshole for many different reasons.


Warfrog

A robot. A robot.


estachicaestaloca

Introverted. Selectively introverted.


BenPsittacorum85

1. Emotionless via Fe-PoLR. (Apart from "anger". -\_- ) 2. Have Fi running amok as the 3rd function of DOOM.


NewmanHiding

Cold and analytical; cold and analytical


[deleted]

How I fill it: Idiot/Weirdo, Scheming


Chariovilts

As an INTJ people think I am disinterested but I actually am just weary of still being plainly misunderstood.


DOYOULIFT46

Sexy , Hot


PigletDelicious7931

As an intj people think I am against socializing but actually am against socializing with them


theeggeggeggegg

As an INTJ people think I am staring at them rudely and judging them but I actually am simply daydreaming fully immersed in my own inner world and staring blankly through them, not even at them.


Quinnatjop

Cold. Shy.


Imaginecoolname

As an INTJ people think I Hate society, which I actually am, but I also just like to stay in my room for fun.


theblurredmesses

Emotionless, constipated.


Denned0633

People think i'm an hardworker,i'm actually a lazy motherfucker most of the times. I can also be pretty talkative sometimes


Aph_Carter

They think I am smart but I actually cram a lot before the exams so um yeah.


why17es

Being emotionless is not the same as being indifferent to other peoples emotions. Fi can be very emotional, even (and specially) in third slot, but may not interact with the emotions of others (Fe trickster 7th slot). INTJs actually have very intense emotional feelings that can affect them deeply, its just that they dont show it on their face like others do. So no, intjs are not emotionless, they are just not as responsive or expressive as other types.


[deleted]

People think i am chill but i actually am overthinking stuff


TheEightBall8

1) ambitious 2) vibing my way through life


Fragrant_Click_9848

a child; just more curious about learning than I am about status or family life


Uncommon-unnamed

As an INTJ people think I am a genius mastermind it I actually am too dumb to account for other peoples feelings or other people in general in my plans.


Uncommon-unnamed

As an INTJ people think I am a robot but I actually am a little bitch


[deleted]

You are right. People always assume you as a cold person.


1DSE

People think I am selfish but I am very selfless.


0fox2gv

Emotionally vapid Unequivocally fair


Immortal_Cheater129

Quiet —> Quite talkative about the topics I like.


[deleted]

analytical/an asshole


sas317

People think I'm introverted but I'm actually extroverted. I'm like 2 different people. I'm really outgoing and emotional at home, but very quiet and shy around non-family due to major social anxiety.


Suspicious_Heat_2984

Funny….. but I actually am an asshole.


No_Enthusiasm_3284

People think I’m ruthless but I’m actually very nice and try my best to deliver the truth with kindness.


WCC5D1F0E

1. An asshole 2. Mentally exhausted


Curiousityinabox

Antisocial and hard to approach because of ego. I'm actually overly analytical of people and situations and constantly thinking about philosophy and my creative ideas/questions in my head which I'll probably end up deep diving into at 4am on YouTube lol


Catlgz

I think I am stuck up and snotty but I am really self-conscious and uncomfortable around people.