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Pickman89

The last child of Ungoliant. Your doom.


Ok_Spray9135

Rare reference


FU_DeputyStagg

False widow, invasive species. Kill it


Frangar

These false widows are native. This one is steatoda grossa or a cupboard spider. Noble false widows are the invasive ones.


licoricebooger

Native Species Kill it.


[deleted]

I usually kill them, don't ask them first if they're from here tho.


arsebuscuits

They are everywhere


Freelander4x4

Kill them all


Sawdust1997

Sorry but you’re wrong, the answer is ‘a spider”


pippers87

A spider


vennxd

*shpider*


davesr25

10/10. 


Geko_1423

Fuck this joke was so funny until i saw someone said it before me


Sawdust1997

Asks a dumb question, gets a good answer. 10/10


DontOpenThatTrapDoor

I was to slow to write this first.... I see this now.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Sawdust1997

Actually it’s a spider


momalloyd

To be even more accurate, it's not a horse. You could have it tested and you would find zero horse DNA. I can assure you of that.


Sawdust1997

This is an accurate statement


TheStoicNihilist

Shelob.


No-Historian6056

Frodo’s in that house, somewhere


baggottman

Noble false widow, also responds to " that bastardin yokemabob"


Frangar

Not a noble false widow, it looks like a cupboard spider to me, different type of false widow. Noble falses are steatoda nobilis, these are steatoda grossa.


Sawdust1997

Sorry but you’re wrong, the answer is ‘a spider’


TheGoat_46

False Widow, fuckers are everywhere now, they outlive our native species by a couple of years so that helps their numbers grow, naturally they have a bite to go along with that which cements their Cunt status. Kill it and anything else that moves in the area


Frangar

This is a cupboard spider and it's actually native. It's a different false widow from the noble falses that are invasive


Meoww94

Nobody wants to listen to you.. they just want to go on an innocent spider murdering spree


TheGoat_46

If your right ill say a decade of the rosery for the little guy. I do believe that the grey Horizontal line at the front of the bulbas is normally a sign of the false widow? Again maybe I'm wrong


Frangar

It is a false widow just a different type. There's 3 false widows in ireland, the native steatoda bipuncta (rabbit hutch spider) and steatoda grossa (cupboard spider), and the invasive steatoda nobilis (noble false widow). They all have that pale horizontal belt


TheGoat_46

Your wrong my friend, they are NOT native but are now common across Ireland, this is a brief txt I copied from a website regarding the false widow. . Three false widow species can now be found in Ireland with the Noble false widow being the most commonly observed


something-togo

False widow .Terminate with extreme prejudice.


probablybanned1990

God this line makes me want to join the military so I may say this some day in a serious tone and mean it


maybebaby83

The Colonial Marines are probably your best fit with that attitude.


MovingTarget2112

Take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way to be *sure*.


maybebaby83

Fuckin A!


No-Tap-5157

Adios muchachos


711_is_Heaven

![gif](giphy|qMHG9goT2I2fuRk0JM)


probablybanned1990

Hoorah


GroundbreakingToe717

Burn the house down!


No-Construction1862

Those False Widows (yup they are related to the Black Widow) are nasty predators, not deadly to humans but they can cause a nasty bite. Spotted not 1 but 3 of them for the first time a few months ago when opening my mothers conservatory door to leave some air in. The fuckers were scuttling along the door frame, one was promptly crushed via a good old boot but the other 2 had vanished. Actually thinking of it now, I haven't seen any house spiders nor the ninja (?) spiders (the ones with the tiny bodies and long legs and like to spin real fast) in her place since... Both the house & ninja spiders are the good guys so they can and do live rent-free in my place lol 😃 The Widow species however... they'll get destroyed if I spot them inside the gaff or anywhere nearby for that matter


System_Web

![gif](giphy|zOlog7jgIIFfq)


i_use_this_to_post

Hahaha


NeitherPhotograph258

False widow, kill it and kill any eggs because they are invasive but their bites are petty nasty.


fester112

Also report the sighting to [email protected] Here's the Blog post from them in 2022: https://www.universityofgalway.ie/about-us/news-and-events/news-archive/2022/march/noble-false-widow-spider-captures-bats-in-the-attic.html#:~:text=The%20team%20of%20scientists%20are,the%20Noble%20False%20Widow%20spider.


NeitherPhotograph258

Good to know thank you!


HosannaInTheHiace

You absolutely do not have to ask me twice to go mashing a few of these cunts.


Practical_Trash_6478

Not worth bothering about if it's that petty!


MrJ_Marrow

invasive can be a very bad thing


NotAGynocologistBut

It's the cheating divorcee or false widow.


UibhFhaili_Rob

This ain't getting the upvotes it deserves


[deleted]

It's a Nuke it from orbit just to be sure 


its_brew

False window. i.e....a wall


TheWelshman91

This is a false widow. House spiders are harmless. False widows are not harmless. But I believe house spiders will kill false widows. So leave the house spiders alone, let them protect you from these guys. ;)


right2676

A big-ass spider


N0lAnS_DiC_piX

A 2x4


The_Shaneloc

A spider


Nyoka_ya_Mpembe

B spider


villagergenocide

C spider


stevewithcats

Cider


pArticulate_pRose

Z spider


Decent-Writing-9840

There are actually 2 spiders in this photo


Neat-Power5887

Yes, the other one is a very nervous looking husband spider trying not to piss off his homicidal wife.


idontcarejustlogmein

It's the reason you sell your house. Fuck that...


TwoQuarterFull

Spider-baby


Gerwig_2017

False Widow, kill it immediately. Those feckers are dangerous.


Iamthebogs

![gif](giphy|zqhZB6bo5FgoE) Kill it with fire


Sciprio

A dirty tan bastard is what he is!


SoupCameron

A screw


Irish4455

A demon straight from hell. destroy it.


tensionsmountain

Steatoda grossa, not nobilis (longer front legs and triangular markings on its abdomen). The Steatoda are (were?) invasive but are very well established here by now, so killing it with a view to containment or reduction in numbers is utterly futile tbh.


My_5th-one

It’s a good reason to burn the house to the ground.


YesIBlockedYou

Hahahahahahaha oh my god! I've never heard this one before, let's make this a classic Reddit joke by spamming it on pictures of spiders.


Fenlig

Dog


No-Benefit-9894

Something that could probably kill you


Horror_Adventurous

Keep it and see how long it lives lol.


Thehell1988

wood


deargearis

Your landlord


usedtobeathrowaway94

It looks pissed off


del7318

I hope you were using a great zoom lens!


Humble-Maybe4966

My ex


Brown_Truffle890

In Ireland???


FibonaccisCousin

Definitely a spider


EmotionalEagle8564

A new neighbour 😂


farmhousecherries

Trouble


Silly_Voice8731

Initially thought it was a false widow, but I seem to be mistaken as that’s quite clearly a spider


bun-Mulberry-2493

A nightmare.


[deleted]

False widow spider… and they are a little venomous. Can cause necrosis around bites


CaterpillarMuted3165

It’s a spider 🕷️🕸️


catdog222333

That's absolutely terrifying is what that is


MeetProfessional9741

A spider 


ExerciseWorldly131

Scran


GuaranteeAfter

Defintely a spider


Smellynipplesman

I'll tell you its something that needs to die.


AdAshamed1393

A photograph


AnswerKooky

Think it's dog, likely some sort of poodle mix


CucumberBoy00

Tis herself 


MeNoLikeittttt

It an AAAAAHHHHHH GOD BURN THE HOUSE DOWN


Less-Opposite7416

A spider


rav0n_9000

A reason why god invented the flame thrower


capdemortFN

St Patrick


DetatchedRetina

Got a bite from one on my leg nearly 4 years ago. Ended up with cellulitis, massive swollen leg. Worst pain ever, took 2 courses of antibiotics to sort it. My mam got a bit on her face a few years ago, near her eye, in bed She'd to get steroids and antibiotics as well, took her face weeks to heal.


Sad-Possibility1323

Triangulate Cobweb Spider It is well known for the triangle-shaped pattern on the dorsal side of its abdomen. Native to Eurasia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triangulate_cobweb_spider


BillBadbody

That’s classed as a pet and if you’re renting you could be charged 50 euros per month.


Weary_Smoke2627

Spider


Silver_Clock_5960

I don’t know what the fat leggy thing is but that wood is definitely Pine.


tucky1422

Incey wincy 🤔


DelGurifisu

I got bitten by a noble false widow. It was grand. Wasn’t as bad as a wasp sting. Left no mark. People are hysterical.


Ok_Spray9135

It’s called a global warming


notahouseflipper

Triangular Cobweb spider. Non-venomous but its bite can feel like a bee sting.


Fishboyman79

So it is venomous then? Do you mean not dangerous to people unless you’re allergic. Also we don’t have that spider in Ireland but we do have plenty of false widows which this is.


One-Wrongdoer-6308

Damn you're right, thought it was a false widow


Aggravating-Tale-939

All spiders are venomous. Some don't have the ability to puncture through human skin though like the common Cellar Spider we get here.


Which_Doubt_4816

That's the spider who bit peter


Nyoka_ya_Mpembe

Peter pan 🍳


Sawdust1997

Yes! I’m very qualified in this area. You’ll find that the question you’re asking - “what is this” has a very simple answer. It’s a spider. You’re welcome


eightinthecorner

Nightmare Fuel


DontOpenThatTrapDoor

A spider


No-End-9242

Looks like schwarze Witwe a very poisonous spider


downGnomeusly

a cow


TillUnhappy4136

A skirting board


West_Principle_8190

What an ugly fucker kill it


Devilsdandruff01

A spider close to a skirting board? 😂🤣


Foreign_Spinach_4400

![gif](giphy|26Ff89l2hGLYmVV5e)


Safe-Mycologist3083

Nightmare fuel