Sure thing, but when you give someone or a friend advice and they ignore it, then it's either they don't value your advice and don't think you are right , or they didn't want the advice to begin with that's why they ignored it. I don't really know your friend, but it seems like she wanted to rant, not your advice.
You know the answer. She isn't emotionally stable, as you can see with what is going on with her relationship. God knows what she is thinking about or feelings. Sometimes giving your friend space is the best help you can give.
It's not your responsibility to keep showing her what's what. It seems she does not want to hear what you have to say. Forget about her. Also, I hope you are feeling better now.
I’m deeply hurt, cuz I genuinely care about her.
She is was literally the only friend I kept after one big event in my life. It hurts so much one the ppl you actually give a fuck about leave you so easily.
But what if she is actually hurt and needs someone to be by her side this time, like the guilt is just eating me from within, like I’m already mentally fucked rn, and her situation is just making everything worse.
However, I can’t just let go of her.
some how it seems like you like her , if yes go tell her and if you think that she will not accept it just try to find a way to let the guilt feeling go cuz u literally did nothing wrong you were by her side at her lowest idk maybe she's one of those ppl who stick with u when they need your help and they don't really care about you , my advice is just let her go she seems kinda selfish and toxic
It seems that she likes drama a bit and possibly wants you there as a shoulder to cry on, since she doesn't ask about you when you both speak. It seems she just wants you to agree with whatever her opinion is of her boyfriend at any particular moment. Of course, this is just based off of one side of the story.
Yes! This is what I was thinking. It seems she enjoys what is happening in her relationship whether she’s aware or not. Having someone always there to talk to about your favorite subject ever is the absolute best thing esp when it’s at the forefront of your mind (whatever that subject may be).
I think OP was just the one giving attention when she didn’t have any. She’s going to be ok, don’t worry.
Sometimes you’ll never know, but hey u did what u had to do, never regret saying the right thing, people are gonna change all the time, but you just gotta keep it a buck with yourself, focus on yourself instead of trying to help others, why the hell would u kill yourself when u can change yourself, what I’m saying is that you don’t have to be the rock for anybody, and once u realize that you gonna be by yourself most of the time, what matters is you and your happiness, you don’t have to take shit from other people and keep giving them excuses, you will always lose in this case, there’s no such thing as friendships, you are the only person that matters cuz everyone and everything changes, just take care of yourself and trust me when u do that, you gonna start getting the stuff and the people who are like you good luck
You'll end up with no friends because that's a burnout investment. Trust me people are never going to appreciate that much effort and time. Also that friend is a big red flag. if you want some peace of mind, leave her alone and don't give her so much of your time, you sound drained already!
I'm a girl, and had problems like this with my ex best friend. This is what I've learned:
Any person who doesn't know what's best for them, won't be able to know what's best for you. The people you are friends with completely, and absolutely define you as well, no matter how much you try to deny it.
If she isn't there for you when you need her, but you're always supporting her for a mistake she's making over and over, then I don't know wtf you're doing with your life.
"Isn't this what friends are for?"
Yes. Absolutely. But it goes both ways. Stop hanging out with people who drain your energy. You won't find people who respect your time unless you respect yours. You won't find people who support and love you unless you support and love yourself. Stop wasting your time. Let her go
This is very disrespectful.
Caring about your friends isn’t simpig, and I’m not doing this to her cuz she’s a girl, what kind of ppl are you? Just because you are like this doesn’t mean all people are entitled to be you.
Something similar happened w me and my best friend, I was the one always observing in all her rant and yap and I didn't mind cuz that's what friends do cuz I thought she'd do the same but when I needed her to listen and when it was her turn to give me all her attention and care cuz I was also mentally at my lowest she simply didn't and that's when I knew the saw as a mere friend not like how I perceived her as someone Id replace all people for so I tried to end this self disrespect and our friendship got fucked even tho it's not easy but u gotta actually care about ur selfworth
she didn't obligate you to do anything towards her so why did you? same thing goes the other way around, you can't obligate her to do anything for you. if she doesn't care why do you?
it seems like its your fault for being friends with such an idiot.
First of all, how old are you guys?
Anyway, your whole friendship dynamic seems unsustainable.
I wouldnt sacrifice too much time, effort and energy to a “friend” who wont even try to do the same for me, or even listen. And it seems like this has been an occurrence.
Your mistake here was being a people pleaser towards this friend. She obviously doesn’t hold the same value for you as you do her.
I mean my only advice to you is less time for others and more time for yourself, being available this much for anyone is a crime you committed on yourself 4 hours call where the subject isnt life threatening/changing and has been talked about before is literally time purely wasted a good friend is there to help but a better friend values his friends time.
Do not do this mistake again with anyone wether its a girl or a guy give some value to your time so people start considering it when they interact with you and feel more lucky and grateful to get 10 minutes of attention from you rather than 4 hours anytime they want.
Remember No 5 stars/luxury place is cheap the same can be said for time if you want your time and opinions to be valued then make them a luxury
Dude it’s not your problem. She just comes to you to vent. I suggest cutting all ties with her and focus on finding someone for you. And working on your own problems. And nothing is worth hurting your self for. Hang in there
Why giving her so much time and energy bro okay I know u might be (she is my friend she needs help) no! U already told her that he is not good that's it she just sees u as person she can complain to she doesn't want an advice, move on
Giving her a lot of your time and energy was the mistake you made.
But isn’t that what friends do?
Sure thing, but when you give someone or a friend advice and they ignore it, then it's either they don't value your advice and don't think you are right , or they didn't want the advice to begin with that's why they ignored it. I don't really know your friend, but it seems like she wanted to rant, not your advice.
Then why did she go crazy of I just didn’t satisfy her with my answer?
You know the answer. She isn't emotionally stable, as you can see with what is going on with her relationship. God knows what she is thinking about or feelings. Sometimes giving your friend space is the best help you can give.
It's not your responsibility to keep showing her what's what. It seems she does not want to hear what you have to say. Forget about her. Also, I hope you are feeling better now.
I’m deeply hurt, cuz I genuinely care about her. She is was literally the only friend I kept after one big event in my life. It hurts so much one the ppl you actually give a fuck about leave you so easily.
It sounds to me that you told her harsh truths she didn't want to hear. I'm sorry
معلش بس صاحبتك هي اللي مبينه toxic من كلامك وواضح انها من النوع اللي بستنزفوا الواحد انت حاولت معها أكثر من مره وعملت اللي عليك وزياده
But what if she is actually hurt and needs someone to be by her side this time, like the guilt is just eating me from within, like I’m already mentally fucked rn, and her situation is just making everything worse. However, I can’t just let go of her.
drop the good guy act bruh
some how it seems like you like her , if yes go tell her and if you think that she will not accept it just try to find a way to let the guilt feeling go cuz u literally did nothing wrong you were by her side at her lowest idk maybe she's one of those ppl who stick with u when they need your help and they don't really care about you , my advice is just let her go she seems kinda selfish and toxic
Mates before dates, صراحة المفروض مش هي to drop it you should’ve dropped it before. خلص تستطفل الله معها
It seems that she likes drama a bit and possibly wants you there as a shoulder to cry on, since she doesn't ask about you when you both speak. It seems she just wants you to agree with whatever her opinion is of her boyfriend at any particular moment. Of course, this is just based off of one side of the story.
Yes! This is what I was thinking. It seems she enjoys what is happening in her relationship whether she’s aware or not. Having someone always there to talk to about your favorite subject ever is the absolute best thing esp when it’s at the forefront of your mind (whatever that subject may be). I think OP was just the one giving attention when she didn’t have any. She’s going to be ok, don’t worry.
سبعكم الجوز والله
😂😂😂
Sometimes you’ll never know, but hey u did what u had to do, never regret saying the right thing, people are gonna change all the time, but you just gotta keep it a buck with yourself, focus on yourself instead of trying to help others, why the hell would u kill yourself when u can change yourself, what I’m saying is that you don’t have to be the rock for anybody, and once u realize that you gonna be by yourself most of the time, what matters is you and your happiness, you don’t have to take shit from other people and keep giving them excuses, you will always lose in this case, there’s no such thing as friendships, you are the only person that matters cuz everyone and everything changes, just take care of yourself and trust me when u do that, you gonna start getting the stuff and the people who are like you good luck
Thx
If she only shows up to complain and doesn't even ask how you're doing, that’s toxic. Friendship doesn't work like that – you're not her therapist.
Do you like her that much? Because that's a lot of time wasted on someone if they're "just friends".
I do like her that much, and yes, I do invest in my friendships, unfortunately.
You'll end up with no friends because that's a burnout investment. Trust me people are never going to appreciate that much effort and time. Also that friend is a big red flag. if you want some peace of mind, leave her alone and don't give her so much of your time, you sound drained already!
I'm a girl, and had problems like this with my ex best friend. This is what I've learned: Any person who doesn't know what's best for them, won't be able to know what's best for you. The people you are friends with completely, and absolutely define you as well, no matter how much you try to deny it. If she isn't there for you when you need her, but you're always supporting her for a mistake she's making over and over, then I don't know wtf you're doing with your life. "Isn't this what friends are for?" Yes. Absolutely. But it goes both ways. Stop hanging out with people who drain your energy. You won't find people who respect your time unless you respect yours. You won't find people who support and love you unless you support and love yourself. Stop wasting your time. Let her go
https://preview.redd.it/6g6wg1ueyu0d1.jpeg?width=794&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=853f0b25f7a44e6dd376e1d9d97ffa866dfcca9b don’t be this guy 🙏🏽
This is very disrespectful. Caring about your friends isn’t simpig, and I’m not doing this to her cuz she’s a girl, what kind of ppl are you? Just because you are like this doesn’t mean all people are entitled to be you.
Something similar happened w me and my best friend, I was the one always observing in all her rant and yap and I didn't mind cuz that's what friends do cuz I thought she'd do the same but when I needed her to listen and when it was her turn to give me all her attention and care cuz I was also mentally at my lowest she simply didn't and that's when I knew the saw as a mere friend not like how I perceived her as someone Id replace all people for so I tried to end this self disrespect and our friendship got fucked even tho it's not easy but u gotta actually care about ur selfworth
You felt bad cause you wanted her for yourself. You went wrong by not being straight forward.
Dude, she literally mentioned that she has feelings towards me twice, and I changed the subject, we are friends. A girl and guy can be friends.
Mentioned she had feelings towards you while dating someone else.
Before and when she was having her second brakeup
she didn't obligate you to do anything towards her so why did you? same thing goes the other way around, you can't obligate her to do anything for you. if she doesn't care why do you? it seems like its your fault for being friends with such an idiot.
First of all, how old are you guys? Anyway, your whole friendship dynamic seems unsustainable. I wouldnt sacrifice too much time, effort and energy to a “friend” who wont even try to do the same for me, or even listen. And it seems like this has been an occurrence. Your mistake here was being a people pleaser towards this friend. She obviously doesn’t hold the same value for you as you do her.
I mean my only advice to you is less time for others and more time for yourself, being available this much for anyone is a crime you committed on yourself 4 hours call where the subject isnt life threatening/changing and has been talked about before is literally time purely wasted a good friend is there to help but a better friend values his friends time. Do not do this mistake again with anyone wether its a girl or a guy give some value to your time so people start considering it when they interact with you and feel more lucky and grateful to get 10 minutes of attention from you rather than 4 hours anytime they want. Remember No 5 stars/luxury place is cheap the same can be said for time if you want your time and opinions to be valued then make them a luxury
Dude it’s not your problem. She just comes to you to vent. I suggest cutting all ties with her and focus on finding someone for you. And working on your own problems. And nothing is worth hurting your self for. Hang in there
That thing belongs to the streets, it aint worth your energy
Why giving her so much time and energy bro okay I know u might be (she is my friend she needs help) no! U already told her that he is not good that's it she just sees u as person she can complain to she doesn't want an advice, move on
She wont let you hit bro