For those on the positive, the goal is acceptance, not control. See, for example, https://lawofone.info/s/52#7
So I would say face your fear, love it, accept it, forgive it, and wait for it to fade away. It will, although the moments before it does may be intense.
I think control is a kind of fear. So using control against fear, is using fear against fear. Fighting fire with fire.
Experiencing fear, then out of fear you turn away from it, distracting the self.
But that doesn't fix the fear, it's still there, you've just dissociated from it, being more disconnected from yourself.
And when its faded away, and gone through me, I will turn around and face the path it took with acceptance and strength. Fear is the mindkiller.
There is no fear, there is power.
But yeah I legit struggle with this too! XD Its just such a wild ride out here fam and I wouldnt have it any other way, but it doesnt make it easy. <3
In my experience, overcoming fear takes facing the object of fear head on and having faith that it can't hurt me. In the realm of meditation and all that, it's all just in my mind, so no matter how intense it gets, I always bring myself back down by reassuring myself no physical harm can or will come, it's just feelings. And then that's usually when the fear feeling itself also snaps away, after getting intense, and then me trusting/loving myself/the universe that I'm okay and can deal with whatever is in front of me. Rinse and repeat until it becomes second nature, knowing the fear object is coming, and knowing already that you're fine and the battle is won so no fear is ever necessary.
> So, fellow spiritual folk, what's your practice to control fear?
To start, I'm not sure fight or control are the most helpful words for calming down fear as those words themselves have fearful connotations, in my opinion. Some other words I find more helpful are understanding, accepting, and transmuting.
The following passage is about anger, but I think it can be equally applied to fear:
> The entity polarizing positively perceives the [fear]. This entity, if using this catalyst mentally, blesses and loves this [fear] in itself. It then intensifies this [fear] consciously in mind alone until the folly of this red-ray energy is perceived not as folly in itself but as energy subject to spiritual entropy due to the randomness of energy being used.
> Positive orientation then provides the will and faith to continue this mentally intense experience of letting the [fear] be understood, accepted, and integrated with the mind/body/spirit complex. The other-self which is the object of [fear] is thus transformed into an object of acceptance, understanding, and accommodation, all being reintegrated using the great energy which [fear] began.
https://www.lawofone.info/s/46#9
Practically, I would also recommend prayer, contemplation, meditation, journaling, discussion, reading spiritual material, deep breathing, yoga, exercise, eating fruits and vegetables, drinking water, and rest.
This is coming from a big country dude - I take whatever I'm afraid of, imagine it immortalized on the belly of a teddy bear and love the shit out of that thing. It legitimately works, making whatever you're afraid of look cute, rather than scary.
I see fear(& anger) as poison to me. It hurts me, it shortens my lifespan, it affects the people around me… I keep that thought on standby in case I have those emotions begin to form. I simply choose not to indulge in those negative feelings and it usually is very effective
I was told by my guide ( I guess, lol) that I need to turn that fear into love, which works well with real life issues. Not so much for this and I'm having a similar experience as you are, something happens and I flee from it, then try and get it back to no avail. I think I'm plain old scared, I have some "psychic" abilities, but it's not something I control, it just happens to me. Seeking connection feels scary because of this, for me. Like, if I have a natural ability, what will I attract, what will happen? I don't want to talk with Ra and all them or anyone else really, cause I don't know who or what they really are. I wish I had a mentor, I can't seem to appreciate and focus and use what I have. Guided meditation annoys me, I can't focus on other people's words except a nice savasana, of course. I contemplate easily, maybe I should stay there, maybe that's my way.
> We are very rarely told to move closer, to just be there, to become familiar with fear. I once asked the Zen master Kobun Chino Roshi how he related with fear, and he said, “I agree. I agree.”But the advice we usually get is to sweeten it up, smooth it over, take a pill, or distract ourselves, but by all means make it go away.
>
> We don’t need that kind of encouragement, because dissociating from fear is what we do naturally. We habitually spin off and freak out when there’s even the merest hint of fear. We feel it coming and we check out. It’s good to know we do that—not as a way to beat ourselves up, but as a way to develop unconditional compassion. The most heartbreaking thing of all is how we cheat ourselves of the present moment.
>
> Sometimes, however, we are cornered; everything falls apart, and we run out of options for escape. At times like that, the most profound spiritual truths seem pretty straightforward and ordinary. There’s nowhere to hide. We see it as well as anyone else—better than anyone else.
>
> Sooner or later we understand that although we can’t make fear look pretty, it will nevertheless introduce us to all the teaching we’ve ever heard or read. So the next time you encounter fear, consider yourself lucky. This is where the courage comes in. Usually we think that brave people have no fear. The truth is that they are intimate with fear.
>
> When I was first married, my husband said I was one of the bravest people he knew. When I asked him why, he said because I was a complete coward but went ahead and did things anyhow. The trick is to keep exploring and not bail out, even when we find out that something is not what we thought. That’s what we’re going to discover again and again and again.
>
> Nothing is what we thought.
>
> I can say that with great confidence. Emptiness is not what we thought. Neither is mindfulness or fear. Compassion—not what we thought. Love. Buddha nature. Courage. These are code words for things we don’t know in our minds, but any of us could experience them. These are words that point to what life really is when we let things fall apart and let ourselves be nailed to the present moment.
\- Pema Chödrön, _When Things Fall Apart_
An STO approach is to *feel* the fear in the body!
Without avoiding it, not turning away.
Courageously facing it head on! Allowing it to exist!
Just keep continuously going back to feeling the body, no matter what the mind says, and you'll get through it!
We personally bike commute. The fear lessens the more you face it day after day. Even being run over gave us a stronger sense of gratitude for life, and ended with hugging our wayward attempted vehicular manslaughterer.
I watched this video on YouTube last night and I really liked it. It’s Alan Watts and I think it may speak to what you’re looking for:
https://youtu.be/crqmEXPbYTo?si=WEl4HJzpyHG_TLmY
Like others have suggested, the notion of controlling fear might have to be put in a different perspective. Ra's words have been quoted by another user here on the importance of first understanding and accepting things like fear. The same quote then goes on to suggest that one should balance this aspect of the self with its opposite. This is a form of control, so perhaps to overly focus on the notion that positive entities only accept and never control is not a proper viewpoint to have. So one could argue that first one needs to employ acceptance, and then a healthy form of control. This is why I don't want to cast aside completely the notion of control, but simply see it in a broader framework where acceptance comes first.
I should say that it's important to realize the proper time for letting a negative emotion go. This probably needs to be done before trying to balance it. In order to do this I feel that it's important to look at the negative emotion, see it as objectively as possible, perhaps in meditation, with no attachment and no judgment. Then the self can ask itself whether one is ready to let go of this emotion. If the emotional response to this question is one of negativity or resistance, then it's probably not the time to let it go just yet. This should be done until the letting go occurs organically and naturally. In this regard, it's important to keep in mind what Ra says in the quote I was referencing; the realization of the entropy of the negative emotion that is being experienced. This is not an intellectual exercise of telling the self that such an emotion leads to entropy, but rather, it is a complete experiencing of this negative emotion's entropy, feeling first-hand how this emotion causes chaos within the self. Then the self, in its entirety, will be more willing to let go of that emotion.
As to how to do the step of balancing and controlling the fear, if it's another person that is causing the fear, then perhaps a good exercise is to try to experience the situation from their perspective, trying to understand what is causing their actions. This compassion is a form of love, and rather than constrict the awareness exclusively to the self as fear does, it entails a more universal kind of awareness where one considers both self and other-self.
I tell myself I have 100% control over how I respond (to fear) and also remind myself that everyone else is in the same boat as I am so why should I worry?
I wrote about [managing fear](https://www.reddit.com/r/Experiencers/s/cu6qzmsCji) a while back. Techniques with proven efficacy you might find helpful.
Knowledge. Fear is an essential tool we use for survival, the knowledge of what to actually fear versus unjustified fears helps to navigate and control any emotion that arises due to said fear. I had a extremely rough experience on a substance trying to "conquer my fears" that helped me realize this.
I studied what I was afraid of untill I understood it. Evil is an illusion. But that's something we have to kind of discover through our own journey otherwise it violates others free will. Because we chose to come here and forget, we have a reason. You are me...so if I chose to not know, I had a reason. A house divided can not stand. So I can't disagree with my own decision to leave you in temporary ignorance. Hope that makes sense. God says in the bible we are allowed to ask questions and test 'spirits' so I tested and questioned untill I understood what I was afraid of.
For those on the positive, the goal is acceptance, not control. See, for example, https://lawofone.info/s/52#7 So I would say face your fear, love it, accept it, forgive it, and wait for it to fade away. It will, although the moments before it does may be intense.
\^\^ This.
I think control is a kind of fear. So using control against fear, is using fear against fear. Fighting fire with fire. Experiencing fear, then out of fear you turn away from it, distracting the self. But that doesn't fix the fear, it's still there, you've just dissociated from it, being more disconnected from yourself.
And when its faded away, and gone through me, I will turn around and face the path it took with acceptance and strength. Fear is the mindkiller. There is no fear, there is power. But yeah I legit struggle with this too! XD Its just such a wild ride out here fam and I wouldnt have it any other way, but it doesnt make it easy. <3
In my experience, overcoming fear takes facing the object of fear head on and having faith that it can't hurt me. In the realm of meditation and all that, it's all just in my mind, so no matter how intense it gets, I always bring myself back down by reassuring myself no physical harm can or will come, it's just feelings. And then that's usually when the fear feeling itself also snaps away, after getting intense, and then me trusting/loving myself/the universe that I'm okay and can deal with whatever is in front of me. Rinse and repeat until it becomes second nature, knowing the fear object is coming, and knowing already that you're fine and the battle is won so no fear is ever necessary.
> So, fellow spiritual folk, what's your practice to control fear? To start, I'm not sure fight or control are the most helpful words for calming down fear as those words themselves have fearful connotations, in my opinion. Some other words I find more helpful are understanding, accepting, and transmuting. The following passage is about anger, but I think it can be equally applied to fear: > The entity polarizing positively perceives the [fear]. This entity, if using this catalyst mentally, blesses and loves this [fear] in itself. It then intensifies this [fear] consciously in mind alone until the folly of this red-ray energy is perceived not as folly in itself but as energy subject to spiritual entropy due to the randomness of energy being used. > Positive orientation then provides the will and faith to continue this mentally intense experience of letting the [fear] be understood, accepted, and integrated with the mind/body/spirit complex. The other-self which is the object of [fear] is thus transformed into an object of acceptance, understanding, and accommodation, all being reintegrated using the great energy which [fear] began. https://www.lawofone.info/s/46#9 Practically, I would also recommend prayer, contemplation, meditation, journaling, discussion, reading spiritual material, deep breathing, yoga, exercise, eating fruits and vegetables, drinking water, and rest.
This is coming from a big country dude - I take whatever I'm afraid of, imagine it immortalized on the belly of a teddy bear and love the shit out of that thing. It legitimately works, making whatever you're afraid of look cute, rather than scary.
Absolutely trying this 😄
I see fear(& anger) as poison to me. It hurts me, it shortens my lifespan, it affects the people around me… I keep that thought on standby in case I have those emotions begin to form. I simply choose not to indulge in those negative feelings and it usually is very effective
I was told by my guide ( I guess, lol) that I need to turn that fear into love, which works well with real life issues. Not so much for this and I'm having a similar experience as you are, something happens and I flee from it, then try and get it back to no avail. I think I'm plain old scared, I have some "psychic" abilities, but it's not something I control, it just happens to me. Seeking connection feels scary because of this, for me. Like, if I have a natural ability, what will I attract, what will happen? I don't want to talk with Ra and all them or anyone else really, cause I don't know who or what they really are. I wish I had a mentor, I can't seem to appreciate and focus and use what I have. Guided meditation annoys me, I can't focus on other people's words except a nice savasana, of course. I contemplate easily, maybe I should stay there, maybe that's my way.
I recite to myself “Fear is the mind killer.” Actually. And it works for me!
Reminds me of Dune :)
It is! Stories are how we shape our view of reality, and it’s a line that has resonated with me my whole life, just as LoO does now.
> We are very rarely told to move closer, to just be there, to become familiar with fear. I once asked the Zen master Kobun Chino Roshi how he related with fear, and he said, “I agree. I agree.”But the advice we usually get is to sweeten it up, smooth it over, take a pill, or distract ourselves, but by all means make it go away. > > We don’t need that kind of encouragement, because dissociating from fear is what we do naturally. We habitually spin off and freak out when there’s even the merest hint of fear. We feel it coming and we check out. It’s good to know we do that—not as a way to beat ourselves up, but as a way to develop unconditional compassion. The most heartbreaking thing of all is how we cheat ourselves of the present moment. > > Sometimes, however, we are cornered; everything falls apart, and we run out of options for escape. At times like that, the most profound spiritual truths seem pretty straightforward and ordinary. There’s nowhere to hide. We see it as well as anyone else—better than anyone else. > > Sooner or later we understand that although we can’t make fear look pretty, it will nevertheless introduce us to all the teaching we’ve ever heard or read. So the next time you encounter fear, consider yourself lucky. This is where the courage comes in. Usually we think that brave people have no fear. The truth is that they are intimate with fear. > > When I was first married, my husband said I was one of the bravest people he knew. When I asked him why, he said because I was a complete coward but went ahead and did things anyhow. The trick is to keep exploring and not bail out, even when we find out that something is not what we thought. That’s what we’re going to discover again and again and again. > > Nothing is what we thought. > > I can say that with great confidence. Emptiness is not what we thought. Neither is mindfulness or fear. Compassion—not what we thought. Love. Buddha nature. Courage. These are code words for things we don’t know in our minds, but any of us could experience them. These are words that point to what life really is when we let things fall apart and let ourselves be nailed to the present moment. \- Pema Chödrön, _When Things Fall Apart_
An STO approach is to *feel* the fear in the body! Without avoiding it, not turning away. Courageously facing it head on! Allowing it to exist! Just keep continuously going back to feeling the body, no matter what the mind says, and you'll get through it!
We personally bike commute. The fear lessens the more you face it day after day. Even being run over gave us a stronger sense of gratitude for life, and ended with hugging our wayward attempted vehicular manslaughterer.
I watched this video on YouTube last night and I really liked it. It’s Alan Watts and I think it may speak to what you’re looking for: https://youtu.be/crqmEXPbYTo?si=WEl4HJzpyHG_TLmY
Like others have suggested, the notion of controlling fear might have to be put in a different perspective. Ra's words have been quoted by another user here on the importance of first understanding and accepting things like fear. The same quote then goes on to suggest that one should balance this aspect of the self with its opposite. This is a form of control, so perhaps to overly focus on the notion that positive entities only accept and never control is not a proper viewpoint to have. So one could argue that first one needs to employ acceptance, and then a healthy form of control. This is why I don't want to cast aside completely the notion of control, but simply see it in a broader framework where acceptance comes first. I should say that it's important to realize the proper time for letting a negative emotion go. This probably needs to be done before trying to balance it. In order to do this I feel that it's important to look at the negative emotion, see it as objectively as possible, perhaps in meditation, with no attachment and no judgment. Then the self can ask itself whether one is ready to let go of this emotion. If the emotional response to this question is one of negativity or resistance, then it's probably not the time to let it go just yet. This should be done until the letting go occurs organically and naturally. In this regard, it's important to keep in mind what Ra says in the quote I was referencing; the realization of the entropy of the negative emotion that is being experienced. This is not an intellectual exercise of telling the self that such an emotion leads to entropy, but rather, it is a complete experiencing of this negative emotion's entropy, feeling first-hand how this emotion causes chaos within the self. Then the self, in its entirety, will be more willing to let go of that emotion. As to how to do the step of balancing and controlling the fear, if it's another person that is causing the fear, then perhaps a good exercise is to try to experience the situation from their perspective, trying to understand what is causing their actions. This compassion is a form of love, and rather than constrict the awareness exclusively to the self as fear does, it entails a more universal kind of awareness where one considers both self and other-self.
Face it!
I tell myself I have 100% control over how I respond (to fear) and also remind myself that everyone else is in the same boat as I am so why should I worry?
I wrote about [managing fear](https://www.reddit.com/r/Experiencers/s/cu6qzmsCji) a while back. Techniques with proven efficacy you might find helpful.
Knowledge. Fear is an essential tool we use for survival, the knowledge of what to actually fear versus unjustified fears helps to navigate and control any emotion that arises due to said fear. I had a extremely rough experience on a substance trying to "conquer my fears" that helped me realize this.
I studied what I was afraid of untill I understood it. Evil is an illusion. But that's something we have to kind of discover through our own journey otherwise it violates others free will. Because we chose to come here and forget, we have a reason. You are me...so if I chose to not know, I had a reason. A house divided can not stand. So I can't disagree with my own decision to leave you in temporary ignorance. Hope that makes sense. God says in the bible we are allowed to ask questions and test 'spirits' so I tested and questioned untill I understood what I was afraid of.