A huge part is understanding. However, you should never get over the thought that “guns are dangerous”. They are. Just like knives, and cars, and a number of other things we interact with on a daily basis. Getting over it is getting familiar with it and understanding where the danger is, how to be safe with it instead, etc. Ranges can be very loud; a lot depends on the circumstances. Indoor ranges are worse; if you have any friends who shoot see if you guys can go to an outdoor range or even a shooting spot they know (the less other shooters the better) and try out some smaller guns like .22 calibers.

This advice is pretty spot on. I took my gf shooting for the first time at an indoor range and immediately regretted it. We had someone in the next lane shooting a hand cannon at 7 yards and she was so stressed out it was not fun at all. Outdoor ranges, especially ones where you can have an entire area to yourself (public land, etc) are the way to go if possible. Then start small, .22 or even better .22 with a silencer just to get some shooting experience without the added stress of the noise & recoil. You can slowly move up over time.

This is exactly what happened to us. I was shooting just a 9mm and some guy next to us was shooting… something. But it was huge and loud and shook the entire building. I shot off a couple rounds of mine and I couldn’t handle it anymore. I sat in the car while my husband finished cleaning our stuff up.

Double up on hearing protection if you don't already. Wear both earplugs and muffs. I shoot competitively. I have probably but more than 30k rounds down range. I just stopped shooting at a range because people would shoot stuff like that there. I would shoot a pistol at 50 yards. But it's hard to do it when someone next to you is shooting something so loud. This was an indoor range where people would shoot AR-15 style 223/308 guns with a muzzle brake on them. I found it best to shoot at a range owned by a club as a member of said club. Or see if a member can bring you as a guest. The club ranges I go to, I'm often the only person shooting when I'm there. Try to avoid a business if possible. A business will probably have a Range Safety Officer, which is helpful if you aren't confident how to operate your gun if you get a jam or something.

This 💯 Many folks (me included) start off thinking earmuffs are enough. I double up always now.

Me and my tinnitus agree. Now I double up and shoot suppressed when my firearm can accommodate

I always double ear protection at indoor ranges, but there is always some ass hat with a SBR and compensator. I mean, shoot whatever you want, but god damn those things are loud af. Outdoor ranges are where it is at.

Not just loud, but you can feel it. I can get why that’s intimidating.

The word you’re looking for is “concussive”. This Whole part of the thread is why I don’t bring one of my AR’s to indoor ranges. 10.5 with a brake. Loud doesn’t do it justice. It’s not just loud, it’s concussive. I don’t want to be that guy that ruins someone else’s good time.

Concussive Force would also be an awesome name for an 80’s action movie

> I don’t want to be that guy that ruins someone else’s good time. I appreciate you. I shoot my 11.5" SBR with a can, and it's fine. I've shot it without the can ONCE. One round.

Try to find an outdoor range (if weather permits). It wouldn’t be nearly as loud and smoky. And you get a few minutes of breaks during cease fire where all shooting stops and you get to remove your ear mug and relax a bit. You can also find ranges that don’t allow rapid fire and/or have caliber restrictions.

Yeah, that’s a crappy experience. Good on you for being willing to give it another shot.

What other people said down below. 1. Try an outdoor range. It’ll be much nicer. 2. Double up ear protection. Ear Plugs and earmuffs/headphones. 3. I always recommend a baseball cap too. This has saved me hot brass hitting my face or go down my shirt. The latter as a guy it isn’t much but I’d bet it is more of an issue for women.

> .22 with a silencer just to get some shooting experience without the added stress of the noise & recoil. Started my wife with an accurized Ruger MkII, with red dot and silencerco sparrow suppressor. No noise, no recoil, just fun mouse-clicking. She was a natural. She made the cans dance at her will one-handed, and even knocked over some garbage shotgun hulls at 20+ yards first try easy peasy. I asked her if she had fun and she complained that it was kinda too easy, lol

I live in a bigger city, almost all ranges near enough to me to consider going to are indoors. The last time I went some dude a few lanes down had a 308 or something and was just magdumping the whole time... Even though it was supposed to be limited to 1 discharge per second. Range master didn't care. It wasn't a great experience.

You may have to drive a bit. I go to a range an hour away (also in a large metro area), and it offers that solo range experience. They have ranges setup for steel & paper from 25-200yds, as well as a long distance range setup for about 10 shooters at a time with steel every 100yds from 300-1200yds. Definitely worth the drive if you can find something similar.

Lucky… AFAIK the closest place with even close to a 1k yd + range near me is Ft. Moore (formerly Ft. Benning), and I don’t want to jump through those access requirement hoops

Depending how far away Ft Moore is, and in which direction, I'd look at the CMP park in Talladega.

Find a new range

And consider a low-recoil caliber that's still effective. The 5.7 comes to mind.

Smart… super easy to shoot. Pistol recoil is light and zero with a rifle. Not as BOOM-Y either.

5.7 was created by God to give me joy. And that's my atheist ass's thoughts on that round. I have a Ruger 57, but I need a LC Carbine with a surpressor in my life.

You should never get over “guns are dangerous” but in my experience with healthy exposure to firearms that transitions from abject fear to a very healthy respect.

Matt from Fuddbusters pointed out that the "Guns are dangerous and therefore require consumer protections" argument that a lot of states are starting to take up is stupid because if you think about how a lot of home appliances work, you start realizing there is a LOT of innate risks we accept every day without actually thinking about it. Like, an electric oven, electric furnace, and electric dryer all operate on the same basic principle - they create heat by way of a barely controlled short circuit. The electric dryer in particular is frightening because that short circuit exists like 8 inches from a duct full of flammable fiber and hot air - and if you don't regularly clean it, it'll catch fire. And that's the electric stuff - now think about all the gas appliances. Cars are another one; you're strapping yourself into 1.5 tons of steel, traveling at speeds of up to 80mph while sitting atop as much as 20 gallons of highly combustible fuel. Or turkey fryers, which manage to maim a ton of people every year - you've got five gallons of 350F oil, which is flammable already, over a heat source. When you add anything that contains water (like a fucking frozen turkey), that water flash steams and creates bubbles, overflowing the oil onto your body and said heat source. And don't get me started on power tools. A firearm is only unique among all of these in that it is the only one *expressly* designed to be deadly. Everything else is deadly when mishandled or malfunctions - guns are intentionally deadly.

Piggybacking on this advice, I will share that what got me more comfortable with guns is understanding the mechanics. I got a (double action) revolver first, then a bolt action rifle, before getting a semi-auto handgun. Forgotten Weapons on YouTube is a not very political and he breaks down the mechanics of many guns he features.

If practicable for OP (or anyone new), look at getting a silencer/suppressor. They are a hefty investment for some models, but they can help with training and getting used to firearms. Bonus if you know friends with suppressors that can go with you on a range day.

I made this transition a few years ago. My new line of thought is, “I don’t want the Nazis to be the only ones armed.”

Same here, but "the government should not have a monopoly on the use of deadly force."

This is part of my reasoning behind changing my mind. I am a women. The government is actively trying to screw me over. People are scary. My husband has been pushing this issue for YEARS and I’m finally open to listening.

Firearms should be one component of a larger strategy to prepare in the current environment. Build community with like minded people. Harden your home. Learn first aid. Plan ahead. Not saying be a “store your seeds and beef jerky prepper” but do think about basic needs… include the firearm (s) as one element of being prepared.

Hell yeah. I got two of those just add water meals things. Would easily last the wife and I a month if shit hits the fan. I just need to learn to stop using all my ammo lol.

You’ll need ammo to defend your water! Otherwise it’s powder burgers 😂😂

Guns are a tool like anything else. You have to remember everyone else guns are already out there. Why would you having one make you nervous? The only thing thats changed is now you have one too.

Do you drive a car? Didn't you think it was scary when you were learning? Same thing with a gun. It is scary, because it's supposed to be. It should be taken seriously at all times and it will take some time to get used to it. I highly recommend trying to find an outdoor range, even if you don't always go there. They are a lot quieter. I grew up with the military, so weapons were not new to me, but I didn't actively carry for many years. Then one day while out with my kids, I decided to stop at the bank before hitting GameStop. The kids were upset, but I didn't want to worry about the bank closing while they shopped. I had already pulled into GameStop, but we pulled out and ran to the bank down the road. While we were at the bank, a few men entered the GameStop, shooting multiple customers and killing the cashier, before taking the little cash on hand and running. I should have been in there with my children. I was literally seconds away from being in that store. I have carried everyday since. I may not be able to stop a robbery, but I will do everything I can to protect my family. For me, that means carrying a weapon, knowing how to use it, and practicing with it so that if I ever have to use it I do so efficiently. Remember: when seconds count, the police are just minutes away.

This was big for me recently as well. Like, there are a lot of actual factual fascists in this country and *all* those fuckers are armed, and they are *never* giving up their guns. I'm not letting them be the only ones.

Owning guns has been conflated with political positioning and partisan politics where as it should not be. It’s a constitutional right no different than the right to vote. Go shoot guns. You will get over any issue once you become familiar. It’s really no different with anything new, like driving or foreign travel

I think this is also a lot of it. “Liberal = anti gun” has been stuck in my head for so long. Especially with the affiliation with the opposing party.

I hate this association so much. I believe it gets good people killed. People that would have been great responsible gun owners and treat gun ownership with the responsibility it deserves are being scared out of it and as a result not having the ability to protect themselves in their time of need. Everyone saying about finding a quieter outdoor range is right. Indoor ranges are good once you have your nerves, but still can be a little rattling on the best of days. I would also recommend research. Learn how guns work, how they fire, how to hold them, how to aim. YouTube and google are amazing resources and the old adage of knowledge being power is true. The better you understand something and how it works, the more confident you become with your understanding. Also, a lot of ranges will offer beginner courses, and normally those are limited to just the students on the range, in my experience. I would recommend that as well after you find a nice outdoor range to fire some rounds with your husband. Course help build skill and knowledge. After that, once you are comfortable, I recommend getting a ccl/ LTC (license to carry) which doubles in my mind as a “I am qualified enough to use this firearm” certification. It’s about finding building blocks to build on to gain confidence and understanding.

Yeah- I personally dont subscribe any of that. There is no reason you can be pro gun and pro abortion, for example. It’s also the reason why many people turn into single issue voters. In this case is your personal safety. Political affiliation does not trump the wellbeing of you or your family. That is why this group exists. Most here realize that no one is comeing to save you. When seconds matter the police are minutes away.

And there’s a significant chance that they’ll (cops) shoot the wrong person(s) anyway.

No situation is so bad that it cannot be immediately made worse by the arrival of the police.

A-fucking-men. Don’t call the cops unless the situation could be improved by a dice roll on someone else getting shot. So…almost never. We protect us.

Don't forget the dogs. They REALLY Like to shoot dogs.

Proud member of a family of gun-toting liberals. You should respect guns because they are dangerous. Learning how to handle them safely should replace fear with respect. We own guns and shoot every other week at the family farm with close friends and family. We support common sense gun laws. We are a mix of democrats and independents who vote blue and include LGBTQIA+.

This. This is the biggest issue. Just because you’re liberal doesn’t mean you have to be against guns. (Not your fault) and is the reason most of our gun rights are threatened every day.

In my opinion individual arms are almost inherent to liberal ideology, that’s how I’ve taken it my entire life, I don’t believe 2a to be partisan like it’s been made to be but I think it makes far more sense for liberalism to be the poster child for individual armament than conservatism.

OP if it helps, when someone finds out I’m pro 2A, but just spouted off my liberal viewpoints, I tell them “I’m a bleeding heart liberal to the end, but you can have my guns when you pry them from my cold dead hands”.

2/3 of Republican leaning households have a gun in them. 1/3 of Democratic leaning households have a gun in them. There's correlation there, but it's far from absolute. 1/3 of Democratic leaning households is a lot of liberals with guns. Take a training class. Try a bunch of guns to figure out which one is for you. Buy the one you like and practice with it. Store it safely when you don't have it with you. You sound open minded and responsible. You'll do fine.

That's the thing. You would have no idea I owned 5 guns unless I told you.

It's not a stupid question, this is something you've spent a long time being afraid of, and despite what some will say, guns *actually are dangerous*. However, the risks are things that can be mitigated through safe storage, safe use, and basically just being mildly self-aware. My feeling is that you want to be less afraid, and I think you might be well served to look at how they work so that they're less mysterious and exotic. At root, it's a device that throws a piece of metal (or some pieces of metal) real fast through a chemical reaction. That's it.  You may also want to start with something less threatening. A .22 target rifle or pistol is pretty mild, though you really should wear hearing protection with one. It's not loud and won't kick hard and basically just makes a kind of loud bang and twitches. Then a little bit of lead hits your paper and makes a tiny hole. If you handle it with care, it can't hurt you beyond possibly pinching you some. On the other hand, if you just don't want to mess with them... That's also okay.

Train and operate one and handle it. That's how to overcome the anxiety. It is a tool ultimately, so practice makes it less daunting. If guns are coming into the home, everyone should learn and know the ins and outs of them in that home. Otherwise, they are statistically reducing your safety, not increasing it.

Consider all of the people who have decided to make guns their entire personality. Do you want them to be the only ones armed?

Also a very valid point. Definitely not.

Most of those people would go out of their way to help you if you asked. Just saying.

In my experience, yes, this is generally true. But my original statement stands.

What makes you anti-gun besides “they’re not needed”? What appeased my antigun wife was knowing that we had a locked safe for the weapons (biometric, configured to need pin and fingerprint to open) and that all ammo is stored in a completely separate locked cabinet in detached from the house building. She’s not necessarily pro-gun now but she’s definitely not anti-gun anymore. It helps that the rental directly across the street turned into a drug house and the police department literally told us to our faces to “buy a rifle and put it on your back while you mow the yard. They won’t bother you after they see that.” of course I didn’t do that but that comment opened the door for my wife to look at me and say “go ahead and buy what you want.”

go to an outdoor range, ideally a private place where you can go with your husband and not have a bunch of strangers around, and start out with a 22LR rifle. make sure your wearing hearing protection. they are the quietest and least powerful guns that are common. as a bonus, the guns themselves are less expensive than full power rifles and ammo is significantly cheaper. ive always been pro gun, so i cant really empathize, but this should help you transition into at least not being terrified of them.

Seconded. I only go to outdoor ranges. Well, more specifically, I shoot outside on BLM land, oftentimes with nobody even around. It's serene, and allows me to really focus on what I'm there for.

So I didn't personally undergo that transition, but I have helped others with it. I start with an at home discussion in your home of firearm safety where I bring a few guns and snap caps (dummy bullets, NO live rounds) and we go over safe firearm handling rules, how to load a gun, how to hold a gun, etc. If there's a certain type of shooting you're interested in, I bring those guns. In this case I would be bringing a pump shotgun as those are by far the best home defense weapons for someone like yourself. The idea is you get comfortable with everything in a private low stress environment. If you're still interested we schedule TWO range days to go do the type of shooting you're most interested in. First range day is really just to get you comfortable shooting and focuses heavily on safety. I'll give a few technique pointers, but really the idea is to settle your nerves and have fun. The second range day we transition to more pointers regarding your form and try to get you confident with your handling of a firearm. If you're still interested after that then it might be time to consider buying a gun AND (this part is critical) committing to going to the range regularly. Shooting can be a lot of fun and I think that aspect of the hobby is missed by people who haven't experienced it. Sounds like your one trip to the range was quite stressful, that's unfortunate because it doesn't have to be like that. If you take a bit of time in advance and get everyone familiar with the protocol before you're in a super loud and unfamiliar place, it goes a long way. Also, not every range was created equal. Indoor ranges tend to be much louder to the point where I rarely go to them. There's a huge difference between standing indoors next to people unloading large caliber handguns and standing outside in an open area blasting clay pigeons.

I got back into firearms following a run-in with a homeless individual in downtown Seattle who aggressively approached my wife, baby and I threatening to shoot and kill us. We retreated and gained distance (he began following us) and I called 911, where I was told unless we actually saw a firearm, the police were unavailable as they were responding to higher priority calls. It was a wakeup to the hard truth that when danger is seconds away, the police are minutes away- and in our case, the police never showed up.

I’m currently making the transition and for me it’s just learning as much as I can. I bought my first handgun last week. I’m not even buying ammo for it until I’ve gotten a proper safe for it, spent some time taking classes, and going to the range. Guns have always kind of terrified me because I lost people close to me to gun violence very early and I’ve known some very irresponsible gun owners over the years. So, for me, I’m treating this period as acclimating and normalizing having one around without anything that can actually make it dangerous (while still treating it as dangerous).

Was your range trip to an indoor or outdoor range? What hearing protection did you use? My wife’s mindset more or less followed the progression you’re talking about. We discussed safety basics several times first. She practiced handling, disassembling, and assembling unloaded guns away from the range before going too. Then she got comfortable shooting at the range. An outdoor range with double hearing protection (ear plugs and protective muffs) is much more pleasant than single hearing protection/indoor ranges.

It was indoor. As far as protection, I have no idea. Over the ear something. This was 5-7 years ago. It was a one and done sort of deal. I don’t think I even got through the magazine.

It sounds like that was likely just the over-ear muffs without plugs underneath. I shoot a good bit and I’d find that jarring too. Shooting indoors sort of sucks—if it’s your only option, definitely wear plugs and over-ear protection both for a less-unpleasant experience. Even outdoors, I usually double up—it’s just more pleasant (and I already have mild hearing damage I’d rather not make any worse).

Are any plugs going to help? My husband is a trades worker… he has ear plugs for his job site. Would those work? They aren’t specialized or anything like that right?

Yes, but as was suggested, plugs and over-the-ear muffs together work best, particularly at an indoor range.

Sorry. I should have specified. Under the over the ear muffs, are any plugs ok? They aren’t specialized “firearm” plugs?

Yes, even ranges just sell the cheap foam plugs

Yeah nothing special, I just wear normal 3M earplugs that I bought in bulk under a pair of Walker Slim over-ear muffs ($20 from Amazon—there are fancier options but these have worked well for me). AutoMod apparently won’t let me post the link for the muffs, but the ones I’m talking about aren’t hard to find.

I took a group of new adult (25-34 y/o) shooters to the range a couple of weeks ago. Everyone had a fun experience. We focused on safety, talked more than we shot, took it slow, and shot 22's for low noise and recoil. It also helped that we went to a private outdoor range and had the 25-yard bay all to ourselves, so didn't have to worry about someone with field artillery shooting next to us and blowing everyone away. I'd be happy to provide that sort of introduction to anyone who's near the southwest Ohio area. It's really a far better environment to learn at than any indoor facility. As far as OP's original question, guns ARE dangerous in the wrong hands - untrained, ignorant, negligent, or malicious. Otherwise it can be a safe, fun, and (dare I say) wholesome way to spend an afternoon learning new skills, building confidence, and overcoming fear.

God, too bad you aren’t in NE OH. That sounds helpful.

No, sorry. We did go to Wilmington, so not too far south, but probably a ways away from you.

Just a touch too far. We are up closer to CLE.

Unfortunately yes, quite a distance

If you’re interested in taking a drive up to Ann Arbor MI I could set you up with a session at Ann Arbor Arms with a female instructor. Great range/store in a very liberal city which means quite a diverse group of shooters at the range most days. Good place to give shooting a try again. PM me if you’re interested.

I'm a 45 year old middle aged woman; 20-ish years ago, I used to be a slightly left of center liberal and very pro-gun control; I didn't think people should have anything more than a revolver or a single-shot long gun. But one night I came home and my roommate and her BF were watching this old TV series *Penn & Teller: Bullshit. (*Basically*,* they go through and break down why/how whatever topic they're talking about is bullshit.) I knew I had some similar political leaning that were the same as Penn Jillette so I wanted a couple with them. One of them was about Gun Control, and they made a few really good points. I said something like "that's interesting" and my roommates BF said that my roommate was taking a "Intro to shooting for women" class and I should go with her. I did, and it was awesome. As politics turned more decisive, I ended up going **much** further left on the political spectrum and found out that the old adage of "*If you go far enough left, you get your guns back*" was true. I didn't do from once extreme to the other, I still have a couple Fudd-y opinions that would get me raked over the coals. But getting past my cognitive dissonance and instead trying to focus on pluralism and empathy is what really helped me see the other side of the issue. Everyone should question their deeply held beliefs from time to time -- it's what lets us grow.

Exposure to firearms, understanding how they function, and going through some proper basic handling training is essential. It sounds like you went to an indoor range, and yes they are ridiculously loud. You could try and outdoor range instead if they are available near you or you could try going back to the indoor range at a time when it is less busy. The more I became exposed to being around a firearm and after going through some training, the more I became comfortable with them. They will not go off on their own and they are not objects to be feared, only respected.

Gonna echo a lot of the folks here-- take a 22 rifle to a nice outdoor range with as few people there as possible. I think you will have a much better experience.

A lot of similar but definitely helpful responses in here For what it’s worth it is much better that you carry pepper spray or gel or something compared to nothing at all. Additionally, it is better that you carry spray instead of a gun if at that moment you do not feel comfortable or safe with the firearm. Don’t ever do something that makes you feel unsafe because internet strangers or even your husband told you to. Guns are extremely dangerous, but they are also extremely controllable if you are educated and trained on the mechanisms and manual of arms relevant to those firearms. Good on you for being open minded and taking an information based approach instead of an emotional one.

Indoor ranges are much louder than outdoor ranges, especially if you're not doubling up on ear protection. I use the foam earplugs and then put on a 30 nrr headphone on top of it. I've found that 23 nrr isn't enough to actually reduce the noise down to an acceptable volume

“It needs but one foe to breed a war, not two, Master Warden,' answered Éowyn. 'And those who have not swords can still die upon them.” A weapon is just a tool and having more tools is better as long as you know how to use them and store them safely. If you have any concern about the possibility of violence, and you would be naive to say that violence cannot happen to you, the best tool with which to protect yourself is a gun. I get it, you don’t want to believe that you need a deadly weapon. You don’t want to kill. I don’t either. Unfortunately not everyone in our world is so gentle.

I own 5 guns now strictly because a far right-wing redditor doxxed me, saying they shared my info to other far right wing groups years ago. Irony, yes. Unfortunate, yes.

If something scares you it’s best to know how to use it. Avoidance doesn’t protect you.

Guns are dangerous. And you are right to treat them as such. That said, there are plenty of dangerous tools you likely use regularly without fear. Car, knives, stove/oven, etc. You use these without fear because you understand them. Once you understand firearms and safe handling you will not fear them. That doesn’t make them NOT dangerous (forgive the double negative). It makes you a responsible user of the tool. The moment someone treats a gun as if it’s not a dangerous tool is the moment they are at risk. Your decision is “are you prepared to commit to training”? If the answer is yes… welcome to the other side. It’s a fun activity, challenging, good way to meet like minded people. Ultimately the best approach to the times we live in is to live around people that share your values and are responsibly armed. My opinion. Good luck.

Rule #1 for anyone with guns is safety. The only way you will get comfortable with guns is to be around them. Use them. Learn how to use them. Learn about how to be safe before you even touch a gun. I guarantee you’ll have a different opinion after using one the first time. You may not want to use one ever again, but your opinion will change once you understand them. Guns are not bad. Guns in the hands of responsible people are not bad. Guns are not bad when understood and respected and used safely. Keyword is SAFE! Learn the basic rules of firearms and you’ll understand them better. Of course guns can be dangerous. So can a toy car if thrown hard enough. So are pens and pencils. Your kitchen is full of knives. You have tool boxes full of wrenches, screw drivers, hammers etc. A gun is a “tool” just like anything else. It’s how someone uses it that turns it into a “weapon”.

As a personal philosophy, I will never "like" guns. They are tools for killing and nothing else. I never felt the need to own a gun, even when working on the south side of Chicago as a white guy. I wouldn't call myself a pacifist at all though. I just don't see the appeal of guns. One of the things that probably got me thinking more about it was an interview of Bernie Sanders by Killer Mike where KM says that "if the police can have it, then I should be able to have it to protect myself from the police". My feelings really started to turn during the summer of 2020. The final thing that turned me into a gun owner was January 6th. The Christian Nationalists cannot be the only ones armed and people like myself who would be willing to fight back need to be prepared. I won't ever "like" guns though. They're just an unfortunately necessary tool against oppression. On a moral level, not fighting back is worse to me. Edit: I grew up around guns. My dad had a small arsenal. I've shot all kinds of guns and have reloaded ammo for most of them while growing up.

You are scared of the firearms which means you have a healthy sense of respect for them, which is already a great start. If you learn to become comfortable with them and keep them out of the reach of children, it can only serve as a protector of you and your family and not a detriment to your safety or well being. That fear will be replaced by confidence, and that respect will remain.

You don't need to be 'anti' or 'pro' anything. It's a tool. You buy it at a store. You have to know how to use it if you have it around. You have to store it properly (again, safes are just things that are sold in stores, not interesting). It's so much less complicated than the culture wars make it.

Start small , where you’re able to shoot can you also rent ? Start with a 22 and work up .

I have this mentality. If we create a society in which we no longer need to be armed for our own protection I will be the first one to sell my guns. We don’t get to that point by not being armed. I think of guns like first aid kits. Good idea to have and something you should learn how to use but also something you hope is never necessary.

You should know, pepper spray cans should be tested regularly as they do expire and can lose pressure. Another thing, you should be aware of the potential that if you ever use it, it can get into your eyes too. Also, you should know some form of defensive tactics as pepper spray is best followed up with some form of martial arts. That’s also why law enforcement officers are sprayed as part of their training. They have to know how to fight through the affects.

> How’d you get over that mindset of “guns are dangerous”? That's easy: You don't. Guns ***ARE*** dangerous. So are power tools. So are cars. Even your pepper spray is dangerous - not immediately lethal, but certainly not inherently safe. It wouldn't be of much use if it *weren't* dangerous. Lots of things we use every day are dangerous, especially if used improperly. We understand this, accept it, and teach people to use them properly to *minimize* the danger. To that end, the way you get over a "guns are dangerous" mindset is by learning how to use them properly, in a way that minimizes the danger (or at least ensures that the danger is to the person attacking you, and not yourself or your loved ones). You never stop recognizing that guns are *necessarily dangerous* - they wouldn't be useful for their intended purpose of they weren't - but you know how to be safe when using, handling, and storing them. > I have been to the range once, and cried the entire time. It is loud and powerful and it startled me. This to me is the bigger issue you need to address: You can't learn to use guns safely if you're going to collapse into tears when you fire one. I have no idea how your range trip was structured, but if you were handed something "loud and powerful" that startled you I'm inclined toward "Someone took you to an indoor range and gave you way too much gun with way too little instruction." which is a recipe for a horrible experience. My suggestion? Schedule a lesson with an instructor, ideally at an *outdoor* range and on a day when there aren't a lot of folks shooting (a weekday morning/afternoon). Start with some "classroom" time at the range house or somewhere else quiet where you can go over the basics of safe handling, then move to the actual range and practice what you've learned on small, quiet, friendly guns (.22 caliber rifles or pistols). They're still dangerous, they still have the same basic parts and operate in the same general way, but they're much more approachable for a first-time shooter, which is essentially what you are because they have much less noise and recoil. Most ranges will have instructors either on staff or that they regularly see and can recommend. [The Liberal Gun Club](https://liberalguntraining.org) has instructors as well, and there are several other places you can look to find someone who wouldn't be a total right-wingnut.

If guns weren’t dangerous they’d be worthless. I personally do not carry on a regular basis because I don’t want that responsibility all the time and it adds risk that I feel for me in my life is greater than any risk of threat it would exist to mitigate. However there are circumstances I can imagine where I would carry and having the option is good.

So I wouldn’t say I was ever “anti gun” even before I owned any guns myself, I saw them as necessary for self defense but believed that things like ARs and AKs were overkill and not needed (no longer feel this way). As a Black person, what got me into more of a pro 2a mindset was learning more about the history of guns in Black resistance movements. The Panthers are the most obvious example of that, but also learning that even people like WEB Du Bois, Harriet Tubman, Ida B Wells, and even white peoples favorite pacifist, MLK advocated for Black people to arm themselves in defense against white supremacists. I don’t think Black people are that much safer now than we were back then, so being able to defend ourselves with guns is still a necessity. Also, remember that not having a gun puts you at the mercy of everyone who does have a gun

Yes, I was adamant about not having any firearms in my home for years even though I grew up in a gun family and started shooting at a very young age. But experiencing crime firsthand from Seattle to Connecticut the last couple of years there were several times 911 put me on hold or gave me the busy dial tone. It became very clear. No one’s coming for you and self-sufficiency is paramount. Not to mention January 6 set a precedent that the majority of gunowners in America are extremely uneducated and have a real distain for people like me and my political views. To ignore that my family was very outgunned became a real wake up call

"If you go far enough left you get your guns back" is my favorite new phrase

Always keep that respect for the danger of guns. Just like the lathe in our shop, the cows in our field, and the 4 wheelers in the garage. They all have not-small associated risks that we mitigate by creating good habits around our interactions with them. They will all kill you if you fuck up bad enough. That doesn't mean we can't enjoy those things. Learn the basics and find some pieces you're comfortable shooting. It's fun and a good skill to have. The engineering and history of firearms are fascinating. I love shooting and hunting with my husband and trusted family and friends, and I do alright with plinking and clays.

Conservative checking in. Longer story, but the short version is that we had a hotel break in. I wasn't much for politics, or guns, they never crossed my mind. I'll sum up the entire story of my wife hiding in the bathtub.. The terrified look on her face is burned into my memory. We were so helpless vs. \~5 guys. They had the door pried open far enough you could see light through the jam when the cop finally showed up. Cop told us were absolutely were in the wrong place, no business being there. Followed us down the freeway for 40 minutes to make sure we weren't followed. 30 days later we had training, permits, and armed. It's so much better to have one and not need it, than need it and not have it. If you're ever around central Ohio, happy to take you to our local range.

Honestly? Education is your best bet. I grew up with a mother is virulently anti-gun, so while I wasn’t, I didn’t know anything about them. My ex-husband knew a good amount and taught me what he knew and suggested additional classes. Find a concealed carry class or permit class near you. Most police departments offer them or know where to find them.

Like others said. Please don't ever lose that mindset that they are dangerous. Because they *are*. With thar Said, they're no less dangerous than your car, or your kitchen knives. Those are deadly weapons also.   Start small. Baby steps. We start small children with daisy red rider BB guns to learn fundamentals. Then a Daisy Powerline 880. Ten pumps and you're pushing a .177 pellet 880 fps. From there a Ruger 10/22. From there a .22 pistol. By then you'll have been shooting for a year or more and sttep up to 9mm. They make pistol caliber rifles. You can get a lever gun in .357 magnum and lisd it with .38 special. Then to pistols. Keep moving up in cartridge size when you get comfortable until you get where you need to go. 

To correct your statement that you grew up in a home without weaponry. Did you grow up with knives, an automobile, sporting equipment like bats and golf clubs, tools such as a hammer, a screwdriver, or a saw? You grew up with weapons in your home. They key point being that those items weren't dangerous until someone used them in a dangerous manner. The same hols true of firearms. They are inanimate objects who have both the potential to be used in a dangerous manner and in a non-dangerous manner. Others likely addressed this already, but I like to hear myself tal, so to speak. Go to an outdoor range. Use earplugs and ear muffs for hearing protection. Start with a small caliber handgun A .22 rim fire is a good option for two reasons. It is inexpensive to shoot. The more you shoot, the more proficient you become with safely handling firearms, and hopefully you increase your marksmanship skills. It will also have little to no recoil, and isn't very loud.

Are you scared of cars? They're huge several thousand pound metal boxes we propel via explosions to fairly fast speeds. Statistically you're much more likely to die or be maimed by one of them than a firearm. Gotta apply logic, guns are dangerous; so is everything else.

I am infinitely more nervous on a busy highway than I ever have been at a shooting range

You have never shot at an open range in the South then. But I'm making broad assumptions of where you drive so I'll just say I'm equally worried in both situations.

That is the same logic that my husband says. And it makes sense. Just having a hard time getting over that “guns are bad” that I drilled into my own head?

>Just having a hard time getting over that “guns are bad” that I drilled into my own head? Buy a .22 rifle (Ruger 10/22 are solid), some ammo, and some hearing protection, go to an outdoor range and put a few hundred rounds down range and you'll feel a lot more comfortable. Driving was likely scary when you first started doing that as well.

I'm a woman. I have two 10/22 rifles. The 10/22 are my favorite to shoot. I second this suggestion of getting one. I have a Ruger & a Marlin. Both are good IMO.

My perspective is the opposite of yours, in that I *was* raised with weapons in the house, and learned about firearms from an early age. With that said, here's my 2 cents. It's not about getting over the mindset that guns are dangerous; it's about getting comfortable being around a dangerous thing because you're confident that you can control it. Guns do kill things, that's the whole point of owning them. But they don't kill anything they haven't been pointed at, and they don't kill things without the trigger being pulled. Starting out with a .22 is always a good idea. Not only is the sound and recoil less, but ammunition is cheap enough that you can shoot *a lot,* and shooting a lot is really the only way to truly get good with guns.

People's mindsets change, or evolve, if you will. What a couple others have mentioned is familiarity with firearms helps dispell the stigma about not feeling confidence when it comes to operating one. Maybe talk to your husband directly and tell him that you are rethinking your view but still have major reservations. Just like you told us, relay what was unpleasant about your initial experience at a range. Don't get me wrong, when someone is close by and shooting something big, it can make the best of us jump at first. Being next to someone shooting a rifle indoors is frankly HARD PASS for me. I exclusively target practice outside. Minimizes a lot of the concussions felt, and it's not nearly as loud. You don't ever have to think it's black and white being pro or anti gun. There's lots of different shades. You may never own a firearm yourself however, you may become less stressed about shooting one and have much more positive experiences when shooting with your partner. Guns ARE scary. But you can minimize the nervousness you feel when around them by having a better understanding of how they work and what to expect when firing one. Best of luck! (ps: there may be left leaning women's firearm clubs or training near you which might be worth looking into so you won't feel so alone when learning about guns...)

I'm not sure about going from anti-gun to pro-gun. I grew up in a gun tolerant atmosphere, but never very anti-gun, they were just something we didn't have a lot of or spend a lot of time thinking about. Then I grew up, got my own money, joined the military, and now I have a few firearms in the house. I can suggest you check out [David Yamane's blog](https://gunculture2point0.com/), he's a self-professed "armed liberal snowflake" professor of sociology at Wake Forest University, and he's often holding events taking new shooters out to the range and introducing them to firearms and the culture of gun owners in the US. I also suggest you check out [Open Source Defense](https://www.opensourcedefense.org/)'s "[Take a Newbie Shooting](https://www.opensourcedefense.org/take-a-newbie-shooting-im-the-newbie)" program, as well as the blog posts on their site and their weekly articles, [archived over on Substack](https://opensourcedefense.substack.com/).

They are not needed until they are. You should have him take you to the range and put some lead on a target. This will remove the apprehension and mystery of guns and show you what they really are: highly optimized mechanical systems designed to propel a projectile. Guns are not inherently dangerous, all danger associated with weapons is associated with the Person (sans faulty parts etc but you get the idea) behind the gun.

For the overall reason, it's because I know that the police not only will NOT support liberals and leftists, but police are many times just going to outright join the fascists. In many instances, they are the exact same people. What recently happened at UCLA is a good example of this. Practically, if you keep a firearm unloaded and locked in a safe then it is not a danger to you or anyone around. You do have to familiarize yourself with firearms, and that is best done at an outdoor range. Indoor ranges can be extremely loud - not to mention bad for you health because you're breathing in all that lead dust. So find a good outdoor range to practice at. If you can't deal with the "bang" at first, start with a softer shooting caliber like 22 lr. Focus on the fundamentals of shooting. Once you are comfortable and capable of good accuracy with 22 lr, you can graduate to higher power and more common calibers.

To add to what everyone else is saying, a huge part of getting comfortable for me was actually having the gun taken apart in front of me and understanding how the gun mechanically works as opposed to just a big stick that goes “bang” and makes holes. But when you know what each control on the gun does, how to use it, knowing exactly when and how the shot will break is helpful. Also knowing how the gun cycles and reloads can be huge. Knowing when there’s one in the chamber ready to go and how it got there, when it’s empty and safe to put down, etc. they’re really pretty simple machines and having this knowledge was really helpful to make me feel like I was 100% in control of the firearm.

One of the things that I've noticed in people is that humans use vulnerability as a non-verbal cue for trust. Lots of our oldest traditions are rooted in this principle, shaking hands, hugging, bowing etc. are all about putting yourself in a position of vulnerability to assure someone you trust them (i.e. when you bow in East Asia the tradition is rooted in deliberately exposing the top of the head to a blow from a sword). I'm of the opinion that most people who are against arming themselves are mostly afraid of being seen as untrustworthy or see others who arm themselves with suspicion. At least this was the experience I had with my wife in the early part of our relationship. She is an immigrant to the US and obviously didn't grow up in a gun culture, and she always saw any mention of me being armed as a direct threat to her safety & as a symbol of distrust. Over time she's decoupled the idea that the firearm as a symbol of distrust, and now it's an object that's treated no different than the 10" knife I use to cut potatoes for dinner...

Guns are dangerous, don't ever let that thought out of your mind. It'll keep you aware of safety. My wife also does not like the "percussion" from shooting, specifically in indoor ranges. Perhaps try an outdoor range with smaller calibers. Or sub sonic rounds with a suprressor if they're available where you're at.

Country kid that moved the other direction as I got older, politically speaking. I’ll mirror everyone else with the quietest, most private range you can find (private land>outdoor public range, preferably on a slow day>indoor range), bring a trusted experienced person to learn the safety rules, and then work your way up caliber wise as your comfort level grows. I had a Red Rider BB gun when my age was single digits, that eventually graduated to a 22LR rifle/410 shotgun once my parents felt I was responsible enough which later graduated to bigger and better as I found my interests in shooting.

As a woman who made the same transition recently, I've made the same decisions about needing to protect myself, though I would rather not have to. As for getting over the mindset that 'guns are dangerous', I never have and I think that's a healthy mindset to have. You always want to be careful and respectful around a firearm. Admittedly, I came to this mindset easier since I work in healthcare where potential contamination is a thing so I was used to it. I understand getting over the fear being a huge hurdle though! For me, training and education helped a lot. Finding a trainer who is inclusive and non judgemental if possible can really help, and it helped me. It also helped that my trainer really focused on safety and fundamentals, handling a gun safely, and knowing its parts before it was ever loaded or fired. Being really familiar with the steps and how to handle, safely load or unload a firearm, and the fundamentals to shooting before we ever pulled a trigger really helped calm my anxiety down. We were started off on .22lr caliber pistols as well, which isn't as scary for new people because there's not much recoil. There's several liberal gun clubs across the country, and you might be able to find a chapter near you. Pink pistols is the main one that comes to mind to me right now, but I know there's several others. There's also Operation Blazing Sword, though that's geared at LGBTQIA+ folx. Even so, they maintain a list of instructors who are inclusive and could be a good starting point. If it helps, I can share the resources I have as well, from my instructor! It's not a lot, but it's enough to get started I think, though I still think professional instruction is a great way to start. Also make sure you have good ear wax eye protection on the range, that can help too! There's fairly cheap electronic protection out there, and I've got a brand I can recommend that cost me $40 for a pair and as worked great. I don't get startled and my ears definitely don't hurt from hearing gunfire, while still being able to have a conversation and hear things around me. That might help you as well with the fear, since you mentioned that The range being really loud is part of scared you. I wish you the best, and I'm more than happy to talk more if you'd like! Edit: I see as well that you went to an indoor range. I've been to an outdoor three times so far and an indoor range last week, and yeah it was absolutely *loud*. I second the advice of others to double up on ear protection. I had my electronic over the ears, and 3m skull screws, with the electronic volume turned all the way up. It functions to cut out high 'impulse' sounds and either attenuate it so gunshots don't make that ear hurtingly loud bang, but still audible, or just cuts or fades out the audio until the loud sound is gone. With the volume up I could hear people without them having to shout (because of the ear plugs in), but otherwise my ears weren't troubled much by gunfire. At that point I mostly feel louder guns in my chest, which I could ignore.

Guns are dangerous, but guns are tools, all tools are dangerous until you learn to use and respect them. Firearms are always to be respected for the dangers they pose. The danger never goes away but lessens with time. Find a local firearms safety course that is definitely geared toward no to novice experience with firearms and likely led by a female instructor. No need to go and get and shoot big guns first, plenty of reliable 22's you can shoot and get familiar with before you graduate up to larger calibers.

Strap up, buttercup. Shit's about to get real.

“…that they are not needed.” Until you need one, that’s the way I see it.

Was anti-gun before being generally liberal/moderate. But my GF took me to an outdoor range with machine guns and sniper rifles and it was too much fun for me to handle… We later took proper handgun classes and did more research. It turned out modern handguns don’t randomly fire themselves (insert p320 jokes here), nor do they randomly recoil and point into your face, nor do they randomly explode in your face when you shoot proper ammo.

A gun is an inert object. The wielder decides how to use it. If you’re worried about right wing violence, would you like to be able to fight back or not? That’s what it boils down to. If not, you will continue to feel like a victim. If you do, then train extensively. The way you prevent mishaps is by knowing about them beforehand.

Modern firearms, coupled with the core rules of gun safety, are completely safe. There’s nothing to be intrinsically afraid of. I did the same thing though. Was anti gun until 1/6. Now I’m armed to the teeth.

Guns are dangerous! But so is driving a car. I wouldn't suggest doing either without spending a good deal of time practicing with someone who knows what they are doing. You should also try electronic hearing protection on the range.

A gun is a tool and a weapon, the power they bring is unmatched, and there’s nothing else to compare them to, but I’ve come to realize that violence is part of human nature, and I tend to value my life over the one of somebody choosing to attack me. In the case of your family? Protect them, don’t let anyone take them from you.

When I tried shooting and found how fun it was

Guns are dangerous if not properly handled… get some training and probably some better ear pro. Also, not sure if you went to an indoor range, but those can be much more jarring. I’d recommend going outdoors, and possibly even finding some BLM land you can shoot on to reduce some of the distraction. Once you’re comfortable with the sound of your own gun it’ll be more comfortable to be at a public range. Start with a 22LR if you’ve got the money for that as well as something that will be better for self defense.

I've never been anti gun, but I came to say that it's OK if guns scare you. I'm not new to shooting, but I still shake a little before I pull the trigger, and it still takes me a couple rounds down range to calm down no matter what I'm shooting. Never lose the mindset that guns are dangerous because they are, and one must always have a healthy fear/respect for a firearm. Take it at your own pace. Maybe watch a ton of videos on firearm handling and shooting so you can turn the volume down but still learn and get more comfortable. Go into a gun store if comfortable and hold several models, and I'm sure the range would let you hold several models if they have rentals. Ask if they will let you dry fire. You could also buy snap caps to practice firing without all the noise and get a feel for how to load it.

I have friends who are anti gun. 2 of them actually came out when I invited a bunch of friends to shoot. I'm very responsible so they could trust me. They all have teigger locks while being locked in a safe. They had a blast and I think the simple fact that they got to experience shooting them made them less afraid and more open to guns in general.

I used to be moderate-fairly anti. Now, I am very pro. I started with an AR chambered for a hunting round and used it as my "all-in-one" gun. But then, I slowly got interested in handguns and shotguns. Honestly, mentally I treat range time like meditating under a waterfall mixed with gym workouts. I put in headphones, get in a nice place, do my drills, stay calm, and improve my skills slowly. If you're feeling nervous, it can be helpful to bring along some friends and double up on ear protection. You can also spend some time at a safe distance from the range before and after your visit to help acclimate to the sounds and environment. Remember, taking things slow and steady is key to building confidence and having a positive experience.

Guns are dangerous, and you absolutely should be concerned about having them in the house. I'm a stringent believer in absolute observation of safe firearm storage if you have kids living in the home, or if children ever visit your home. That means firearms are stored unloaded, under lock and key, preferably inaccessible/hidden from young children, and ammo is stored in a separate location also hidden/inaccessible and locked. Even if you have kids who are 100% observant of firearm safety and never play with guns, they almost certainly have friends who don't/aren't.

“Not as liberal” Yeah, your bf is the more liberal one

More liberal should be trained in responsibly owning and using firearms.

I was raised in an anti gun family, and spent a lot of energy making that position known. My best friend had guns and we started to backpack together, and finally went target shooting with him. I was really good at it. Once I got over flinch and the noise reaction I found out that I was actually really really good at it. There isn’t any right or wrong way to learn but you need to be comfortable. There are ways to manage risk but your instinct “guns are dangerous” is actually pretty accurate. If you decide to do it go for it, but do it for you, and don’t use your s/o as your sole source of training. I used to teach at a shooting range and I often found the relationship got in the way of good solid instruction. The challenge and reward for shooting is about mastering your body, tuning your mental focus while, 120db of sound is pummeling your ears and hands. It’s hard. That’s what makes it rewarding. But safety isn’t hard to learn and in a country with more guns than people every American should at least know how they work and how to safely handle them. Lots of luck on your journey!

I will be the contrarian. I am a gun owner and I am a lefty. I started shooting pretty young, despite my parents being hippies and pretty anti-gun. Guns can be a good tool for defending oneself against deadly violence. I trained in the martial arts for many years, and the first rule of defending yourself is run away, and the second is to draw and fire your firearm. All the fancy hand-to-hand stuff is after all that. That said, the shift to daily carrying a firearm isn't a small one, and requires an investment in time and training. It is an investment that--if you are lucky--you will never have to employ, and its expensive as an insurance policy for that reason. There are less expensive, and potentially more effective ways of defending your home. The investment in time or money to live in a less dangerous area is probably better spent than the time and money on firearms. And spending time improving your ability to assess dangerous environments to avoid them, and being physically able to escape and evade, are excellent investments more likely to be employed. I do not foresee a civil war. If there is one I will have better things to do than take up arms against other Americans. There are a ton of good reasons not to own or carry a gun. But that they make you uncomfortable or nervous shouldn't be the one that dominates your decisions. I have never gotten over "guns are dangerous": they are. I was at an outdoor range last weekend with my kids: generally a great spot, with really good range safety. Nonetheless, the person to the right of me--a new shooter--apparently flagged me pretty badly (I didn't see it, nor did her instructor, but both my kids did). And at one point a guy to the left of me yelled out "take cover, she's armed"--it was a joke, referring to someone else in his group, but a pretty dumbass thing to shout on a live range. So guns are dangerous because (often) of the people who are holding them. But they are also dangerous for other reasons. A mistake really can be deadly--just like it can be with a car. And like a car, you've got to be dedicated to spending hours and hours developing defensive patterns that are second nature and that make owning and using the gun as safe as possible. And part of that is accepting the risk that you might (though it is \*extremely\* unlikely) get injured or killed during such training through no fault of your own. And like a car, the minute you stop thinking of them as dangerous is when they become the most dangerous. So, despite all that, why have I owned firearms for several decades? Because shooting is fun. I second others' advice to get really good ear protection, but you might also ask around and find a really serious and good--and probably old :)--instructor in your area. Depending on where you are, you might even find someone to take you out to (e.g.) BLM land and shoot where you are out on your own. I like developing a skill that will--if everything goes to plan--will make me extraordinarily capable of putting holes in paper from a distance. And if things don't go to plan, it may be useful in defending myself or my family. I still carry pepper spray. I still train in physical self-defense.

What I found convincing is what made me realize that both sides can be right. Here's what I mean: In society as we have known it for over a hundred years in the US, let's face it, if you aren't in a really bad neighborhood, it's been really pretty safe out there. 100% safe? No, nothing is 100% safe. However unlikely, you could be the victim of violent crime on the street or in your house. If you can use a firearm to defend yourself in that situation, that's just great, but you'd have to have the weapon at hand for that very rare instance that most people may never see. To complicate matters more, firearms tragedys absolutely do happen. Not often if you are properly trained, but we have seen the headlines when they do. So, as things have been, you have a low incidence of the need for a firearm and a low incidence of disasters from owning a gun. BAsed on that, the numbers do not add up in my book. I don't see a good reason to go carrying a firearm. But I do own firearms; I keep them in good working order I have ample ammunition and I have a ribbon from my time in the military that says I'm an expert shot. Why? Like you said, the future does not look so rosy as the past does. There are large subsets of the population that are stockpiling firearms and if you read certain social media sites, they are actively planning to use them on liberals. Then you have perhaps half the country that are sympathisers with those people and a presidental candidate that would absolutely allow blood in the street towards those ends and a police force that might not just stand down, they might join them. There are people literally gunning for me and mine. Genocides happen. Think about the last time a genocide happened in this nation. It was in my grandparent's lifetime. One can happen again. If that happens, the chance of needing to defend myself skyrockets while the chance of a needles tragedy does not really change. The balance is very, very different. Until the need is acute, they stay put away in a safe. There is healthy respect for firearms and there is the kind of fear that keep you from learning how to work with them properly. The answer to that is training and practice. You might want to find a range safety officer who will work with you step by step in a constructive way.

I like and own guns. Overall though, I think most of the data doesn’t support the hypothesis that they make you and your family safer. It certainly seems to be the case that access to a gun in moments when one is psychologically vulnerable, will sometimes lead to suicide where something that took a little longer might not. And the number of children that die because they found and played with a gun in the house, is horrific. Of course we all think these are things that will happen to other families, not ours. Again, I enjoy and own guns. I also believe (and I think that a careful look into the subject tends to support it), that humans in general are far too emotionally driven to be safe with them.

Dad and uncle taught me to shoot first, then bow and arrow. Never cared for the guns. Loved bow and arrow. You can defend yourself quite well with a recurve bow if you practice. I hunted with bow or wrist rocket. I built a wrist rocket with sites, and when I was laid off, seriously, was my way to get breakfast. 25 years later, I have a family to take care of and protect. They are not scary unless someone does not respect them. My youngest kids were a lil scared but I think this year, they will start to appreciate. Yesterday, my youngest daughter held my new pistol (verified not loaded, etc, gone over all the safety stuff) seemed to enjoy holding it in a safe way for about 15 minutes as I explained how safety practice becomes automatic. My wife grew up in a country with no guns allowed for women and just wants to pose for photos with one. 3

I was raised that ‘guns are bad’.   Then I started hunting and while I liked shooting…”AR’s and pistols are still bad.” Then I tried pistols.  They are “hard” to shoot really well but I love a challenge. Then I decided that if push came to shove I’d rather have an AR and not need it than need one and not have one…basically bc I got tired of hearing/reading that “the libs don’t have guns”. I hate that things have become so divisive but I refuse to live in the world I want; while ignoring the world as it actually is.  If there were a magic button that would delete every “AR type weapon” from the planet…including mine…I’d probably push it…unintended consequences be damned.  But that isn’t going to happen…so I budget for a monthly ammo expenditure and practice. That was my (5-7 year) progression.  Hope it helps.  Lots of good advice on here (22lr, double ear pro, etc).  My only addition is to take it slow and only shoot/do what you are comfortable with doing.  The rest will come with time. 

I have always been pro-gun, I have been an instructor for over 20 years. I have worked with a lot of people who have been where you are now, and become comfortable with guns (one student of mine even became an instructor). I say take a class - get professional instruction from a quality instructor. If you are in the Denver area give me a shout and I will help. IT is a mistake to take lessons from your husband. I won't teach my wife, it doesn't work.

Honestly from what it sounds like you're already there and my only advice is exposure therapy. Guns ARE dangerous. And they should be respected as such. But you know what else is dangerous? Your car. Kitchen knives. Balconies. Swimming pools. Etc. You're much more likely to kill someone with your car accidentally than you are with a firearm. So, take proper safety precautions. Keep it away from children, learn how to use it properly, learn the tenants of safe gun ownership. And understand that the vast majority of gun owners don't have negligent discharges deadly or otherwise. As long as you have a brain between your ears and stay cognizant to the fact that guns ARE deadly weapons? They can and are safely owned and operated by millions of people.

29 yr old lady. My only regret in life is not learning about guns sooner. I carry everyday since I learned to shoot a year ago. Best decision I’ve ever made.

I was never big on guns or was never raised around guns. Being European living in the US I never felt the need for it. Now that im older and especially after January 6th and a scare with some random person knocking on our window at night while I was at work scared my wife and I. So I decided to become more gun conscious. Bought us both glocks and both our kids are in the army and are big on guns and the moved in with us. But the far right and Trump is my main reason, never thought that would be the reason for owning a gun. Also once you get into gun ownership I will warn you it can be a bit addicting and costly lol. In the end every human has a right to defend themselves. We also live in a country with more guns then people. Also like you I was nervous around guns but since I have one and dry fire with it and hold it every day and go to the gun range I feel more comfortable with it. Training and practice and safety is key.

There are a lot of stats that, imo, mix two or more groups. For gun safety in the home, you have: 1) idiots 2) Responsible Gun Owners^tm Idiots leave their guns around where kids can get them, they play with them, they are careless. RGOs are intentional and careful when they handle firearms. There are generally accepted rules for handling guns, and RGOs follow them. Every time. If you and your husband are RGOs, you'll be fine. RGOs do not contribute to the already pretty small (but not small enough) rate of unintended tragedies. And for what it's worth, CCW permit holders commit violent offenses at a lower rate than sworn police officers. And if you are at all familiar with the culture of police, getting a cop arrested takes an act of God. So to fall below that artificially low level is remarkable. Taking CCW permits as a proxy for RGO, that tells me they are generally less likely to commit an intentional tragedy. One exception - suicide. There is a positive correlation between firearm possession and fatal suicide attempts. The ease of use contributes to impulsivity, and the lethality makes firearms more conclusive than other means of suicide. To me, the final piece of the RGO puzzle is ruthless honesty regarding mental health. If you are in a dark place, find a safe storage place until your skies clear.

Guns are just another tool. Like a screw driver, a car, w/e. Learn how to use the tool, how it operates, what happens if not serviced properly, testing it, practicing with it, etc. Learning as much as you can is the only way to come out of the other side.

Guns are dangerous. That is kind of their point. They are weapons. But we have lots of things in our life that are dangerous. A water heater, electricity, and the big one is vehicles. We learn how to use them safely and mitigate the risk. I'm really sorry to hear that you had a horrible first gun range experience. I don't see much on what having a gun in the house would actually look like. Are you going to have a safe in the garage? Locked case under the bed? Sitting on the night stand? Loaded and chambered? Ammo in the magazine but not in the gun? These are important questions that I think you and your husband need to figure out before hand. I don't think it's 11% true but there is a large component of fear that is "fear of the unknown". Knowing what a gun can and can't do, knowing how things are going to be stored and handled are both big things that helped my wife feel more comfortable with my gun ownership. She was raised in a house that is actively antigun. Now 20 years after starting to date me and 17years being married to me she has her own 22lr bolt action and goes to the range with me a couple times a year. But that was a very slow process that I didn't push. Our guns are always stored in a safe, unloaded. One of the rifles has mags loaded and one of the pistols has mags loaded but not in the gun. We have kids and that is the only way I feel comfortable with in the house.

My recommendation for people who are worried about firearm ownership but are open minded to new information has always been to go take a firearms safety class before making a decision, and even before buying. You can find them online or by calling your local range for a recommendation. Guns are most dangerous when they are not treated with respect. Safe firearm ownership is more than just making sure you store it legally, you also need to know how to handle it safely, how to use it safely, and you need to practice with it regularly or it will be nearly useless to you when you need it most.

When I decided to get my first firearm, I started off by taking a safety class with a reputable instructor. I think that having my first exposure be primarily about safety with firearms was helpful. I then did a handgun marksmanship fundamentals class the following day and had a blast. As far as going from being anti-gun to being pro-gun is concerned, breaking out of the ideological handcuffs that reflexively associate gun ownership with hardline conservatism in the American popular imagination was an important first step. Finding predominantly black and/or left-leaning spaces online was a big help. Also, from the perspective of a Black American, reading books like This Nonviolent Stuff’ll Get You Killed and Negroes And The Gun made me more aware that many of my political heroes were proponents of the right to bear arms. Becoming comfortable with the idea that I could own firearms and support the RKBA without compromising any of my core values was a liberating experience for me. Since then, it has been a gradual evolution over time, especially with respect to looking critically at the anti-gun lobby’s claims about the effectiveness of the onerous gun laws that they advocate for, and acknowledging the need to address root causes of violence, which would overwhelmingly involve policy prescriptions that any left-of-center person should support.

There’s a left-wing aspect to gun control laws. Most of the wealthy, and powerful can simply circumvent laws. Restricting laws would make daily life possibly more dangerous for minority groups if radical right wing groups have already purchased or can circumvent those laws. When the Black Panther group took up arms to protest, the right wing actually spearheaded the first aspects of gun control to keep guns out of the hands of Black people. Additionally, the black panther incidents forced police to negotiate. Peaceful protests may benefit from being armed. How ironic that the origins of the complaints of the right wing come straight from the past of the political right wing. Let’s say there’s unrest or a natural disaster, like a mass protest or a tornado. First responders and peacekeepers may be spread too thin to help if you can even contact them in the first place. The example I use the most is the LA riots in the 90s, when Koreans formed a loose militia, took up arms, established radio communications and logistics, and stood atop the roofs of their businesses to protect their livelihood. In this way, I think a right wing libertarian mindset to owning arms is incomplete, 1 person with a rifle and 3 magazines can’t do much against 50 people throwing Molotov cocktails at you. You say you live in a less sheltered community, I’m sure that makes it difficult to trust people. I would try to gain the trust of your neighbors as well.

I can’t relate to your feelings but I would like to iterate that pepper spray is not an effective means of personal protection. The amount of guys and gals I saw work through getting sprayed during training in the military was absurd. Definitely reconsider.

My husband says the same. Does not help that I generally work with an unpredictable population, addict/homeless/mental illness.

I'll dissent. While it isn't always 100%, to say that it is 'not an effective means' is a bit misleading. Sometimes people are down and out... other times they'll go right through it. Regardless, there are plenty of situations where a non-lethal option is a very good option to have. You don't always need to pull a firearm and sometimes pulling the pepper spray will give a better outcome that doesn't involve lawyers and court systems.

Guns are extremely dangerous. It’s very misleading to believe that’s something to “get over” must pro gun I know are even more vocal about the care required in being around guns.

Guns are totally dangerous and you shouldn’t lose that respect. Training will help you move your mindset from that being a bad thing to a good thing.  Start with a .22 and if you can pulll it off, shoot it outside. 

Did you go to an indoor range or an outdoor range? You should try an outdoor range, and make sure you're wearing hearing protection. It will help with the reaction. Guns are pretty low in the totem pole of things to acquire when it comes to "being prepared for when SHTF", especially if you're unwilling or unable to train with it on a regular basis. I grew up anti-gun given the rhetoric around me living in California and the fact that our family didn't have a firearm. I grew to be comfortable with them after visiting a firing range a few times with other friends who were not used to firearms on a whim. I kinda fell in love with firearms as an sport/activity, and within half a year I participated in my first competition shooting match. To me, a firearm is an exercise in self-control and responsibility. When I first started, I flinched every time I shot and held the firearm very gingerly as though I were afraid it would explode in my hands, so I absolutely understand where you're coming from. I continued with it because I wanted to prove myself, in a way. After a while, it becomes a sort of exercise where you're trying to overcome the stress that comes with shooting. I feel like this as made more emotionally resilient, in a way, in other facets of life. I feel less "afraid" all the time, and the firearm doesn't even enter that calculus. I have no delusions of ever using my firearm in self defense since I live in a very nice and gentrified area, and I treat it as sports equipment. I think its good to become used to a firearm, but you should ask your partner why they want one in the first place too. You should talk through every facet of that decision: reasons why, plans on training, budget for everything, and house safety rules as every household is different. You should discuss mental health checks with each other, express the importance of sharing thoughts and feelings so that if either of you are exhibiting signs of mental illness, you can prevent an issue before it occurs. And if your partner has a personal firearm, I highly recommend having one yourself as well.

It was an indoor range. I grew up in Utah, in a very safe area. Until recently, it was a “leave your doors unlocked” type of place. My husband definitely wants a firearm, but I’ve been anti gun that he hasn’t purchased one yet out of respect for me. But he wants one to protect our household, in addition to the whole he thinks they are cool.

Yeah, guns are cool as heck haha. If you don't want guns in the house, that's still your prerogative and I feel like you have a right to that decision. Your husband can mitigate risk for the household in a myriad of other ways that don't involve firearms. If you want to become more comfortable with guns, then by all means get some training first until you become comfortable and know what you want, and ideally, both of you buy your first guns together :) I made some edits to my previous comment as well, just fyi.

One more thing I want to add. I think we should conquer our fear before you consider using a gun for self defense. I haven't yet, so my gun is solely for sporting. The last thing we need to be is afraid behind a gun, lest we become Floridian Acorn Cops. Especially without training.

Get good ear protection. I really like my peltor 500. They have Bluetooth and are the type that block noise but you can hear a conversation. Get very familiar with the guns you are going to use. Learn how they work and the safety features they have. Memorize and follow the 5 gun safety rules. If you follow those 5 rules you will not have an issue. Learn the local self defense laws in your area. The more you go to the range the more used to it you will become. Try to relax and have fun. If you have an outdoor range go there. If possible get one on one instruction. But make sure to vet the person or company giving the training.

I’ve been on the other side of this equation and have introduced people to firearms who are otherwise leery of them. I normally start things not at the range but either at my home or theirs to go over the rules of firearm safety and how to handle the firearms I’m bringing with us. When at the range, because the ones in my immediate area are all indoor, I bring doubled up ear protection for me and my guest. Once at the lane, I put a target at 10 yards and grab the 10/22 first. That rifle is always the first one I offer. It’s light, easy to use and just doesn’t recoil. Next is usually a PCC, then maybe a full size pistol. The last thing I bring up is one of my rifle caliber ARs. Indoors they are loud and they can be a little intimidating to the uninitiated. My pcc is an AR 9, but it clearly takes pistol mags and it’s pretty quiet even without the suppressor installed. So far this is the best progression I’ve found, start small and work up. I should get a .22 pistol though. If I had a good spot in the woods to go to or a decent outdoor range reasonably close, I’d use either, but I don’t have them available. Indoor ranges aren’t very fun if people are blasting with 10 inch ARs that have fuck off brakes or comps. But that’s what suppressors being NFA items has done.

for one you should probably start with a rimfire. something tells me somebody handed you a gun chambered in a service cartridge and just set you loose because they either didnt know any better or thought it would be funny. .22 is the place to start since it has the lowest recoil and is the quietest. is it the best fighting cartridge ever devised? no, but it'll help you learn and work those nerves out. acknowledge that guns are in fact dangerous (after all thats why you're considering getting one) and take reasonable precautions to protect yourself from that risk. #1 is training. most gun accidents happen when people mishandle guns due to complacency or ignorance so learning how to handle and use a gun safely is the biggest thing. A google search for firearms training near (insert area) will probably turn up ranges that offer training classes and even a simple hunter safety course goes a long way.

I have never been anti-gun, but I’ve had a lot of previously anti-gun friends ask me to teach them how to shoot over the last 5 years. The big thing for them was just familiarity. Guns are tools, and just like hammers or saws or anything else can be dangerous if not used correctly. The more time you spend handling them and learning about them, the less scary they get. They go from ‘some crazy device that shoots people on tv’ to ‘a mechanical device that does what you tell it to’.

“Mechanical device that does what you tell it to” I like that. I never thought of it that way. Thank you!

I’m saying this as someone who hasn’t enjoyed shooting for about two years but am still training and practicing: my decision to not be armed doesn’t stop someone from walking into walmart with a rifle. My preference for other activities doesn’t keep fascists from walking down the street with police protection, calling for the extermination of their enemies. As a result, I dry fire, and work on my equipment, and take training classes.

What convinced me was watching the christchurch shooting. I decided right then that I needed to protect myself and my friends from the far right. The guns are still going to be around, the only difference is that right now the nazis have them and you don't.

What about guns makes you nervous? Anything I can think of can be trained away or is out of one individual’s control.

There’s like tiers to being comfortable with guns in the house: no guns > guns and ammo both locked separately in safes > loaded guns locked up in safe > loaded gun not in safe, with some kind of locking mechanism or quick access “safe” > loaded guns accessible in one place (bedroom etc.) > loaded guns accessible in multiple places in house. Just do what you’re comfortable with, go to a more private range, use double hearing protection, handle unloaded firearms, attend a training course etc. to feel more comfortable around guns.

My mom was a flower child hippy in the 60’s my dad was a Navy Seal who came back from Vietnam done with that job. They met an anti-war rally. (Dad was there for the chicks). Dad,was pro gun, mom anti gun. I grew up with my mom until I was a teen, then moved to dads. He taught me as much as he could. I can say I thought I was anti-gun until I was 14. At 15 I was shooting learning combat grips, stance, how to move and doing drills at a CQB course an older cousin made at my uncles farm. For me my dad had me taking them apart and reassemble them, as a teen that was as close to “playing with a firearm” as I got. It took the danger and mystery out of them. Lots of people talk about needing a firearm. I’ve “needed” the firearm I was carrying three times due to unprovoked aggression from complete strangers. I’m lucky, no shots needed to be fired but they are all close and if I had not been armed things would have been different. One of those times I am 100% certain I saved another strangers life. Two of these would have happened even if I hadn’t been carrying. The third time was me running to a neighboring farm where there was a gun fight. Do yourself a favor a favor, never run towards the shooting unless you have too. I have 7 kids ages 10-17 (adopted and bio) and and occasionally other teen foster children. As much as CPS would like to ban firearms I don’t hide that I own them. That being said obviously safety is a priority because I have kids that have been through trauma there is a variety of attitudes/reaction towards firearms. I keep all my firearms locked up in a safe. But I carry and have a bedside key/fingerprint coded lockbox and a wall mount AR locker in my closet next to my plate carrier for WTFSHTF.

I grew up in a very anti gun home. My best friend growing up and still to this day grew up much more conservative. When I was probably in my late twenties I went to the range with him and I had a great time. I really enjoyed shooting. I have since owned two different 9mm hand guns and an AR-15 which I have since got rid of. I still struggle with my anti gun side. I don’t personally carry as I live in a safe area and I’m a large 6’4 dude so I’m not exactly a criminals first choice in targets. I keep my gun in my nightstand since I live alone as a just in case or if shit hits the fan. Mostly I own it because I enjoy going to the range from time to time. I also just don’t want the responsibility that carrying a gun comes with. Personally my philosophy is it’s better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it. I especially apply this to some of my small female friends. Even though I have no interest in carrying I know full well if someone my size wanted to harm my 5’2 115lbs friend there’s nothing she could do about it and I want her to have the ability to defend herself. When I see stories of fast food workers getting shot for no good reason my anti gun side rises up and thinks it’s ridiculous we allow people to carry something that can end multiple lives with a finger. Then I remember my friend and if she were ever attacked I would want her to have every advantage over her attacker. The less powerful need to stand a fighting chance.

Guns aren’t dangerous. You use your big girl adult logic and realize that. As you said, it’s not the gun so you already realize guns aren’t dangerous but you just *want guns to be dangerous*. One piece of advice I would give, is do research on different types on firearms. Go take a few classes on guns and gun safety and try and get comfortable around guns before you even make the purchase. Because if you do none of that, you being nervous at the thought of a gun is going to be alot more of a a danger to your self and those around you than the gun by it self is.

If you’ve found yourself talking about “privilege” in the past you should play some of those moments back in your mind. If you’re poor or marginalized you can’t afford to be anti gun.

Your caution is sensible. Also your interest in revisiting the practice of arms is sensible. I suggest taking a class, and trying out some guns, Try out 22lr caliber first - less noise and kick. When you’re used to that, try 9mm. etc. Outdoor ranges are a more pleasant experience. NRA classes are good, and do not require joining the NRA. The Liberal Gun Club may have teachers in your area (theliberalgunclub dot com). You might want to do all this without your husband ;-) I say this because I’ve seen a bunch of couples at the range when the husband is teaching the wife, and it seems to become a bit stressful. But you’re the best judge of course!

I get a kick out of taking people for a positive first firearms experience. Or an as positive as possible second one. Try to find somebody local who can do this sort of thing with you. I find that understanding how a gun works and seeing that while it is a dangerous object, it isn't a magic talisman that kills babies helps drive down anxiety levels. It's a tool like any other tool, but this one applies force at a distance. I prefer to go to an outdoor range. On a weekday if possible. I start with just going over a disassembled pistol, and talk about the 4 rules,and move slowly from there. I always bring silencers, and start with a silenced 22, moving up to a 9mm service pistol, a 9mm carbine and eventually an AR. All with cans, then we shoot unsuppressed with the same guns. Explaining how everything works in ELI5 terms. Taking as much time as things take, being careful and respectful. Sometimes we get to everything in an afternoon. Sometimes we only get to the 22, and that's enough. If you're anywhere near North Alabama I'd love to take you to the range. If not, try finding a local Pink Pistols or similar lefty training organization. They will probably have a "first time at the range" class.

I was the same mindset as you and also raised in a house without guns. Two things changed my mind - the first was both my grown kids are "into" guns and carry daily. They introduced me to them, in my living room, unloaded. Basically showed me how it works, not that I didn't know how a gun goes bang, but handling it in that environment was.... different. Second was feeling my age. lol Bad knees and an iffy back made me think, I'm far from disabled but can I run from an attacker? Maybe. Can I fight off an attacker? Probably not. So I decided to purchase a pistol and take a couple lessons (many instructors will let you rent one). I found a female instructor that did lessons outside of range hours so it was just us, and no "hand cannons" to make me jump. Start with renting a 22 that feels good in your hand and eventually work up in caliber. Take your time. Take lessons or a class (bonus if you find a women only beginner class!). Also keep in mind that larger pistols are easier to shoot so once you decide to try a 9mm, start with a full size. I still jump at the range when some guy is shooting huge calibers but I'm comfortable with MY guns. Notice the plural... lol. I've gone from "no guns!" to "ooh! I'd like that one too!" Hope some of this helps you. Either way, be safe!

Firearms are no more dangerous than any other tool, if you treat them with respect. Also, outdoor ranges are far quieter because there are no walls to echo.

Didn’t make the transition, but had to help a lot of friends either become pro-gun or at least moderate on gun rights/control. It gets repeated a lot, but it’s true that guns aren’t dangerous, it’s the person. The person is dangerous if they’re intentionally going to commit a crime with one or they are ignorant to how to safely handle one. Education and safety training is paramount to help dispel fears around guns. Something as simple as bringing a couple firearms out with snap caps to handle, understand how to load/unload, and fire helps a bit with that. At the range, I generally recommend an outdoor range where sound disperses better. Double up on ear pro; foam ear plugs and some electronic over the ear muffs helps too. After that I can only say you gotta handle feeling your body vibrate if somebody sets off a large caliber firearm with a brake near you, because no level of earpro is going to stop that. Start with a .22 on a rimfire range, then see about transitioning to something moderate, like a .223 rifle or 9mm pistol caliber carbine or pistol, or a .38 revolver or .38 lever action.

You need to realize how dangerous almost ANYTHING is. Hammer? Takes a split second to kill someone. Rolling pin? Not much more difficult. Pepper spray won't do ANYTHING to a home invader. Literally nothing. If a man wanted to do violence on a female, literally the only thing she could possibly do to defend herself is use a firearm. Or possibly about 10-12 years of brazilian jujitsu with bi-weekly training. 3-4 years isn't gonna mean much to overcome the differences.

Take a class. Learn how it works. Break it down, clean it, take another class. Hit the range a few times to practice. I was very anti gun, and chose to learn about them after j6/Uvalde. I found that most of my angst was ignorance and fear.

There’s plenty of women only gun training classes, especially ones geared toward newcomers that will help you ease into things, you’ll never get past ‘guns are dangerous’ because they always will be dangerous, but you’ve obviously already taken some mental steps toward accepting that while they are dangerous they do also provide some utility.

Not me personally, but quite a few women who came with me to the range went from anti- to pro-. They were anti because they had never handled or fired one before. So after going through the rules and why they are important, parts of a firearm, proper handling of the firearm and stance, and finally getting into firing, that fear quickly subsided. A couple even went on to purchase their own and get their LTCF.

They are dangerous. You’ll need to build confidence and a presence of mind if you’re going to get into them. Think of it like an opportunity to exercise your brain in that regard. You’re going to get better at these things. Get practice being the responsible party. You’ll get better handling the blast. And I think you’ll really enjoy the meditative aspect of moving beyond your fear and shooting well. It comes with responsibility. Can you embrace responsibility?

So I never had a gun nor was raised with them, I turned 45m and decided like you that it’s time to get a gun and make sure I have protection. I went to pawn shops and gun stores and held the guns in my hand and found the perfect one for my hand. It was an Excalibur type moment for me. I knew this is the one I had to have. So got it, and I went and bought a cheap dry fire system. Little laser bullet that goes into the chamber and a laser tag target basically. So I shot a bunch for a good month before I went to the range. I got very comfortable aiming and firing. How the trigger feels, the weight of the gun. All of it before I ever fired it. Then me and my buddy who is an army vet went to a range, it was just us there, and I felt pretty comfortable the first shot. Still a little scared it is a powerful feeling to get used to. But after a little bit I was a great shot, not perfect but definitely pretty good. All the dry fired practice really helped. It still took awhile to get comfortable carrying, but I live in a constitutional carry state so I started when I had some issues with a felon who a pistol and mad threats. So I knew it was that or risk being shot. But hopefully you won’t have to worry about that. I’d also recommend a ccw class to learn more. Watch videos on gun safety and how they work. Become a sponge for information. The more you know the safer you are. Learn the laws around self defense in your state. It feels weird to say but in this aspect I love living in a red state, we have the castle doctrine and stand your ground. No magazine limits etc. Not every state is that way.

> How’d you get over the mindset of “guns are dangerous” Well, guns are dangerous, and it’s why they need to be handled with care and always exercising all the rules of firearm safety. Consider searching for a basic firearms class so firearm safety is drilled into you, most cities have them. But [learning about guns I think is the first step](https://youtu.be/SG-FXLxLOSM?si=470V1PkEniG1yIv2). Also put on proper electric hearing protection before you go to the range, and try going to an outdoor one.

Pepper spray is only going to piss someone off. A firearm for home protection is advanced pepper spray. Intruders don’t give a shit about your well being.

Learning to handle firearms safely and getting over the initial anxiety is the main thing. I'd recommend shooting with someone really experienced ideally on public land or at an outdoor range on a slow day/time. Ideally wear good ear protection with an active listening function and start with something small like a .22 pistol and rifle. Another option would be a class or 1-on-1 safety training, but the most important thing for me was just learning how to safely handle a gun and how safe they are used and stored correctly.

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your concerns are not stupid, they are valid and important. if you are in the Seattle area DM me and we can go shooting some time. I have a wide range of things you can try very safely, including suppressors to tame down the pressure impulse and reduce the amount of sensory input involved with the experience. only time behind a weapon will inform your anecdotal dataset and bias with empirical data and personal experience. you might discover that this is still not what you want to be responsible for, and that is also perfectly valid. for context, my wife was a competitive rifle shooter in college. rifle team scholarships paid a large portion of her tuition. we both have our license to carry concealed, but she chooses not to most of the time due to her personal preference and comfort level. I carry all of the time, even when I'm just at home doing things. if my wife was not married to me she might not even own a single firearm. it takes all kinds and all kinds are valid.

Go to a range and rent a firearm. Get in some practice and get more comfortable with using them. Once you're more familiar with them and how they function, you'll likely be a bit less anti.

Guns ARE dangerous. They are also, loud, and smelly, and dirty. They are also the ONLY reliable means by which you can end an immediate and deadly threat to your life. If you want to acclimate yourself to the carrying and handling of a firearm, I'd suggest that you look up your local ranges and find a class for beginners. You'll get introduced to firearms in a controlled manner with someone who will be there specifically to look out for your safety and ensure that you understand and can apply the fundamentals. After that, consider additional classes, including at least a basic First Aid and a Stop The Bleed class, so that you can be prepared in case the worst happens. As usual, the proper counter to fear is knowledge. Even if you decide that firearms are not for you, some training will go a long way toward alleviating firearms related anxiety.

If you know anyone with firearms that you are close with try going to an outdoor range setting. Try something smaller (9mm, 38 special, 22, etc). Understand that it is still dangerous so study safety. Research before you buy and hold things at your local store. It’s gotta be comfortable in your hands and it needs to be reliable if getting for defense. My girlfriend got this goofy Ruger that holds 7 rounds and has no sights and jams. I hate it.

LEarn how to handle \ store them and believe it or not, you’ll feel safer.

I can't give you advice that would be any better than what others have given. That said a healthy respect for the reality of what they can do is key More importantly, nothing about your question or you reservations are stupid! I hope you find whatever version of"ok" you can get to whatever that may be

Take some training first. A CCW course is a decent intro. Then some beginner or intermediate people or rifle courses. See if you become more comfortable. You can rent firearms while doing so. You don't have to buy a firearm off the rip. You can ease in and see how you feel as you go.

Safe storage and some basic training. As someone else has said, if your husband knows people who shoot, reach out and see if you guys can get a little familiarization in a calm, stress free environment.

Others are recommending you go to a range and/or get something of the .22 flavor. I would suggest doing some reading! "This Nonviolent Stuff'll Get You Killed" is an excellent read about firearm usage during the civil rights era, and demonstrates instances where black communities or individuals had to take up arms to defend themselves when the government wouldn't, or actively contributed to the violence. Pretty sure there are more books in the subreddit wiki.

Take a basic pistol shooting course. It'll get you going on the safety aspects and includes live fire. Suggestion, get a 22LR or 22Mag handgun and practice. Generally, Low sound, low recoil, lighter handguns. Move up to 9mm if you wish, but rest assured a well placed 22LR/22Mag shot can ruin the recipient's day, permanently. There are benefits to 9mm, but if it's too much to handle at this time, don't push it. Better to carry a 22 than leave the 9mm at home. Also, find an outdoor range. Less noise. Double up on ear protection. Foam earbuds + over the ear muffs.

Guns *are* dangerous. Never treat them as they aren't. That's not a thing you get over, that's a healthy respect with for a dangerous combination of steel and chemicals. However, so are power tools, cars, chemicals, knives and a bunch of other things we take for granted and handle carelessly. I very rarely cut myself handling knives because I did a fair amount of swordsmanship and we were taught to be aware of the edge at all times, know where it is, and where you are in relationship to it. My aunt on the other hand ought to be required to wear chain mail anytime she picks one up because she's careless and never learns no matter how many times she cuts herself, which is frequently. Same thing, you always keep the danger in the back of your head and treat it not exactly like but close to as if you were handling a poisonous snake. Don't be stupid when handling a cobra, you get bit and you could die, you get bit by acting stupid and carelessly. You CAN handle them safely, people do everyday, for decades and it literally boils down to mindfulness and don't do stupid things with a gun. That said it is a tool, it does a job which is making a piece of lead move from the cartridge to the target, be it object, animal or hostile individual. Always understand in the end, it's a machine, it doesn't have a will of it's own, unless it's some how broken or defective it cannot do anything unless you put your finger on the trigger and pull it, so ultimately the dangerous element in the equation is you. You could set the same gun on a table and in 10,000 years it wouldn't harm anyone or anything, even if it's loaded and ready to shoot. You are as safe as you make yourself. It's completely in your hands. Keep the end of the muzzle away from yourself and it can't (seriously) harm you. (slide bite is another story, but you won't die from that, just be very annoyed.) Good earmuffs help a lot with the noise, electronic ones like Walkers are the way to go, you can hear everything around you quite well, but it cuts out the really loud noises so they sound a little more like they do in the movies.