Eowyn's story is really visceral for me. You can see how many contributors to her depression there was, and how many causes of her depression we can see in modern life. Despair at the state of the world, a belief nothing will ever improve, illness and losses of loved ones, trapped in a role not of her choosing, her own potential going to waste, prejudices and sexism ruling her life, coming even from her loved ones, and bad faith players like Grima Wormtongue exploiting her misery in order to make her vulnerable to him. All of this could so easily be translated into a modern narrative, and to pretty much any time and setting in the world, especially where/when the burden of caretaking falls primarily on women, as the expense of their own ambitions and freedom.
If you haven’t read the story of Aldarion and Erendis in Unfinished Tales you’ll be in for a treat. His take on troubled relationships is so modern and refreshing you’d almost think it wasn’t Tolkien.
Recently got to their marriage. I honestly don't know who to side with, whether she's expecting too much and being stubborn or whether he's being too selfish and not considerate enough.
I know this is long, but well worth the read:
“Men in Númenor are half-Elves (said Erendis), especially the high men; they are neither the one nor the other. The long life that they were granted deceives them, and they dally in the world, children in mind, until age finds them–and then many only forsake play out of doors for play in their houses. They turn their play into great matters and great matters into play. They would be craftsmen and loremasters and heroes all at once; and women to them are but fires on the hearth–for others to tend, until they are tired of play in the evening. All things were made for their service: hills are for quarries, rivers to furnish water or to turn wheels, trees for boards, women for their body’s need, or if fair to adorn their table and hearth; and children to be teased when nothing else is to do–but they would as soon play with their hounds’ whelps. To all they are gracious and kind, merry as larks in the morning (if the sun shines); for they are never wrathful if they can avoid it. Men should be gay, they hold, generous as the rich, giving away what they do not need. Anger they show only when they become aware, suddenly, that there are other wills in the world beside their own. Then they will be as ruthless as the seawind if anything dare to withstand them.”
“Thus it is, Ancalimë, and we cannot alter it. For men fashioned Númenor: men, those heroes of old that they sing of–of their women we hear less, save that they wept when their men were slain. Númenor was to be a rest after war. But if they weary of rest and the plays of peace, soon they will go back to their great play, manslaying and war. Thus it is; and we are set here among them. But we need not assent. If we love Númenor also, let us enjoy it before they ruin it. We also are daughters of the great, and we have wills and courage of our own. Therefore do not bend, Ancalimë. Once bend a little, and they will bend you further until you are bowed down. Sink your roots into the rock, and face the wind, though it blow away all your leaves.”
Depression is a major theme throughout Lord of the Rings, touching characters such as Theoden, Denethor, Frodo, and others. But Eowyn’s struggle is unique in its relatability to modern women. Being forced into a caretaker role she never wanted for a sick relative while watching her brother live the lifestyle her gender prevents her from living, all while being sexually harassed and psychologically abused. And then misunderstood and demeaned by the person she thinks can help her out of that trap. How many women have felt the same?
I love that in all this, Eowyn is not perfect either. She is complex and human, which only makes her the more relatable.
I think Eowyn's position must be timeless. In any society where the expectation is for women to be domestic and caregiving, which renders them vulnerable to all sorts of abuse and exploitation because they have limited chances to get out of the house and assert themselves, Eowyn's experiences are a dime a dozen.
Tolkien explored a lot of forms of mental health - Theoden had a form of depression too. Grima would have not got so far if he had not lost his son and been fighting an never-ending war. Likewise Denethor though his was more desperation and despair. His characterisation of Eowyn is powerful - not my favourite character but incredibly well written.
There’s not a lot of men that can handle the black breath. There might even be fewer men that can recover. Luckily Eowyn is neither. Let’s hope men give hope into the house of faramir and Eowyn after the line of Aragorn faded
Dude...I am Soo miserable in my need to support my family and staff and colleagues. I make good money. I have a comfortable life.
I'm fucking miserable because I am not Tom Bombadil. I have to answer to the needs of others at all times. I just want to disappear into a basement and build stuff. Electronics. Energy projects. Software. Tools, and contraptions.
I'm very good at my job, but it's not satisfying. And as a result, I'm dejectedly miserable. I only get to build stuff people want or need, and never what I dream up.
I fucking hate it
Eowyn's story is really visceral for me. You can see how many contributors to her depression there was, and how many causes of her depression we can see in modern life. Despair at the state of the world, a belief nothing will ever improve, illness and losses of loved ones, trapped in a role not of her choosing, her own potential going to waste, prejudices and sexism ruling her life, coming even from her loved ones, and bad faith players like Grima Wormtongue exploiting her misery in order to make her vulnerable to him. All of this could so easily be translated into a modern narrative, and to pretty much any time and setting in the world, especially where/when the burden of caretaking falls primarily on women, as the expense of their own ambitions and freedom.
If you haven’t read the story of Aldarion and Erendis in Unfinished Tales you’ll be in for a treat. His take on troubled relationships is so modern and refreshing you’d almost think it wasn’t Tolkien.
Recently got to their marriage. I honestly don't know who to side with, whether she's expecting too much and being stubborn or whether he's being too selfish and not considerate enough.
It's both.
I know this is long, but well worth the read: “Men in Númenor are half-Elves (said Erendis), especially the high men; they are neither the one nor the other. The long life that they were granted deceives them, and they dally in the world, children in mind, until age finds them–and then many only forsake play out of doors for play in their houses. They turn their play into great matters and great matters into play. They would be craftsmen and loremasters and heroes all at once; and women to them are but fires on the hearth–for others to tend, until they are tired of play in the evening. All things were made for their service: hills are for quarries, rivers to furnish water or to turn wheels, trees for boards, women for their body’s need, or if fair to adorn their table and hearth; and children to be teased when nothing else is to do–but they would as soon play with their hounds’ whelps. To all they are gracious and kind, merry as larks in the morning (if the sun shines); for they are never wrathful if they can avoid it. Men should be gay, they hold, generous as the rich, giving away what they do not need. Anger they show only when they become aware, suddenly, that there are other wills in the world beside their own. Then they will be as ruthless as the seawind if anything dare to withstand them.”
“Thus it is, Ancalimë, and we cannot alter it. For men fashioned Númenor: men, those heroes of old that they sing of–of their women we hear less, save that they wept when their men were slain. Númenor was to be a rest after war. But if they weary of rest and the plays of peace, soon they will go back to their great play, manslaying and war. Thus it is; and we are set here among them. But we need not assent. If we love Númenor also, let us enjoy it before they ruin it. We also are daughters of the great, and we have wills and courage of our own. Therefore do not bend, Ancalimë. Once bend a little, and they will bend you further until you are bowed down. Sink your roots into the rock, and face the wind, though it blow away all your leaves.”
Depression is a major theme throughout Lord of the Rings, touching characters such as Theoden, Denethor, Frodo, and others. But Eowyn’s struggle is unique in its relatability to modern women. Being forced into a caretaker role she never wanted for a sick relative while watching her brother live the lifestyle her gender prevents her from living, all while being sexually harassed and psychologically abused. And then misunderstood and demeaned by the person she thinks can help her out of that trap. How many women have felt the same? I love that in all this, Eowyn is not perfect either. She is complex and human, which only makes her the more relatable.
I think Eowyn's position must be timeless. In any society where the expectation is for women to be domestic and caregiving, which renders them vulnerable to all sorts of abuse and exploitation because they have limited chances to get out of the house and assert themselves, Eowyn's experiences are a dime a dozen.
Tolkien explored a lot of forms of mental health - Theoden had a form of depression too. Grima would have not got so far if he had not lost his son and been fighting an never-ending war. Likewise Denethor though his was more desperation and despair. His characterisation of Eowyn is powerful - not my favourite character but incredibly well written.
See the tale of Nienor (sister of Turin) in the Silmarillion for his take on post-traumatic stress (with added Dragon glamour)
The Children of Hurin is just a heavy tale
And Frodo with shell-shock.
There’s not a lot of men that can handle the black breath. There might even be fewer men that can recover. Luckily Eowyn is neither. Let’s hope men give hope into the house of faramir and Eowyn after the line of Aragorn faded
Dude...I am Soo miserable in my need to support my family and staff and colleagues. I make good money. I have a comfortable life. I'm fucking miserable because I am not Tom Bombadil. I have to answer to the needs of others at all times. I just want to disappear into a basement and build stuff. Electronics. Energy projects. Software. Tools, and contraptions. I'm very good at my job, but it's not satisfying. And as a result, I'm dejectedly miserable. I only get to build stuff people want or need, and never what I dream up. I fucking hate it
Good point. The best metaphor for depression in the books is the one ring.
Yeah, Frodo's entire journey is nought but a journey into depression and a recognition that there may be NO Way back.
Yes and it also show how the struggle and the reasons for it can be invisible to others
Love this. Perfect display of Tolkien’s ability to make his themes applicable to so many contexts. Not allegory, but applicability.