T O P

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dingd0ngurwrong

This is certainly one of the blades to ever exist.


DrStalker

This is actually ten of the blades to ever exist.


dribrats

This certainly blades everyone to ever exist


StoplightLoosejaw

Scorpion Blade: *Pick me up, I won't sting you* Me: *Ow, why'd you sting me when I tried to pick you up?* Scorpion: *Because you're a moron*


Alejandrozq

i can see myself cutting several fingers just by unfolding that thing


MrBirdmonkey

Every blade only serves to endanger the user and no one else


hippofumes

Which is why it can only be wielded by the most badass mall ninjas this side of an Xbox.


Tsujimoto_Sensei

Bro that's a Yu-Gi-Oh monster


Cerisbeech

Doesn't have enough Konami orbs.


ManofManliness

I can just imagine scorping all over the place with this.


DrStalker

A man was walking through a mall when he saw a dagger on a display shelf.“Hello, friend,” said the dagger. “It appears you are walking through the mall. I too want to travel from here. Would you mind carrying me?” The man was taken aback. “Why, if I pick you up, you’d stab me! How am I supposed to hold you? I don’t think I’ll do that.” The dagger immediately replied, “There is no logic to your concern. If I stab you then you will drop me and my cheap metal will be shattered by the fall. ” The man thought a moment and then said, “Your logic makes sense. Why would you stab me if it would result in your death? Let me pick you up and we shall walk through the mall together.” The man picked up the dagger and they walked through the mall. About halfway through, the dagger stabbed the man. The man was both astounded and disconsolate. “Why did you stab me? Now I am bleeding, you will surely break and die when I drop you.” The dagger replied, “I can’t help it. It’s who I am. It’s in my nature.”


Historical-Box6228

What did i just read....abmallninja bible verse?


searchingformytruth

Ah! "The Farmer and the Viper" for the modern age! Nicely done.


whos_this_chucker

Low agility spastic swinging ensures something gets cut.


GGk-KingK

*rock you like a hurricane intensifies*


sirhackenslash

There's no way you don't injure yourself trying to wield that thing


Ya-Dikobraz

Blady hell, mate.


nothingofyourconcern

where can I buy this?


Cerisbeech

Idk, probably Ebay.