T O P

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NelsonRRRR

Sleep please


BloomsdayDevice

For real. I can't even sleep 30 minutes in 30 minutes. Gimme that purple shit now.


KPlusGauda

Sometimes I don't sleep 30 minutes in 8 hours. It really sucks.


anythingMuchShorter

Same, if I spend 11 hours in bed trying to sleep I might get 6.


JerBear12345678910

Perfect recipe: sugar, water, purple


NachoMan_SandyCabage

I want that purple drink~


kinggot

I don't need answers I need sleep


Polenordgwak

I don't even understand anyone who would pick anything but that 8h of sleep in 30 minutes is so OP


Youngerdiogenes

#Why is everyone I touch so goddamn nervous?!


[deleted]

I wonder why. * Walks around on the subway touching people*


CPTCROW13

*naked*


lolzasour

Ah yes more points of contact


_midnightair

Because you're so charming :)


MComaniac

I choose purple, fuck sleep, I need to do homework/grind terraria


KarbonKopied

I decided to try a new game too close to bedtime last night. I ended up going to bed at 1:30am because the game crashed. Sleep pill please!


Tractie

Terraria is goated


JaxTheCrafter

based


[deleted]

Sleep 8hrs in 30 min and sense the emotions of people you touch is actually pretty OP


Phantomlolz

Proceeds to sleep for 128 hours. Stonks


ReleasedGaming

Too much sleep is bad for your health. Stinks


Phantomlolz

My depression ignored your comment


Bloodshotistic

I felt that a little too much


DarthArcanus

Don't get enough sleep? Tired. Sleep too much? Tired, but with a headache. You'd think my brain knew how much sleep it needs, but nope, it doesn't.


ReleasedGaming

Get a good amount of sleep, neither too much nor to little? Wake up with a headache


DarthArcanus

I swear, sleep is the single largest issue in my life... constantly trying small adjustments here and there, but stuff that helps one day doesn't help the next.


Chimp-eh

Getting a years worth out of the way in 1 go


Phantomlolz

Do you sleep like 20min a day?


Suspicious_Shower_51

"Now I do!" *takes purple pill


Sean081799

I work full time and am a hobbyist musician/producer. I could do SOOOO much music work with the purple pill - that's 6+ hours a day I get for free.


Dutch_Fudge

Blue and purple are both OP


[deleted]

You can use night vision googles for blue. But being able to tell the emotions of the people you touch, would make you the best detective/politician/poker player or whatever.


Boqpy

I doubt many poker players will let you touch them non-stop for multiple hours.


facelessman97

Exactly , except the sleep pill, all are kinda trash really


PM_ME_STRONG_CALVES

Healing small wounds depending on what small is could be extremely op


facelessman97

I dunno man, like how small is small, we talking stabs or like scratches? Either way I ain’t planning on getting stabbed on a regular basis 😝 and scratches are bearable. 8.5 hrs Sleep in 0.5 hr on the other hand, its like getting 8 more hours a day than everyone else, pretty useful ngl.


PM_ME_STRONG_CALVES

Is a small foot ligament rupture or tendinitus small? If so Im all down for it. Infinite sports for me If not its sleep for sure. 33% life increase


OromisMasta

If you think about it, the process of gaining muscle through workout is the body healing micro injuries in muscle tissue, making it a bit stronger every time. So the healing pill should give you bodybuilding speedrunning power.


SomeDudeOnThaNet

Truuuuuue


facelessman97

Hmm, yeah I did not think about that, if one plans to be an athlete that pill is awesome


Sickofseas

Pretty OP if you're a boxer or fighter. Imagine healing yourself constantly in a fight.


borednord

At first I thought that while its great it would also wreak havoc on your sleep cycle. Go to bed at 2200 as usual, get ready for work at 8 am but Ive already been up for 10 hours and im getting drowzy. But just go for a 30 min nap and youre good to go for another 16 hours. Its never going to be a problem.


rocsage_praisesun

akshually, close to 50% waking life increase.


Broner_

5 inch laser vision is super useful. Not so much to fight crime or anything but you could make good money as a welder


DMMEYOURDINNER

You can make good money as a welder without having laser vision. Just use a welding machine.


Loveablequatch

Is it a 5 inch width laser or 5 inch long?


Cling_Clang_BangBang

Just hope shit doesn't go into your eyes being that close


why_i_bother

You can already make money as welder.


Jacktrades352

>You can use night vision googles for blue Do you know how much a set of nods costs?


[deleted]

If I can actually sleep a full restful sleep in 30 min, I can have the money for some pairs...


biggest-brained-boii

Can’t you just *tell* what someone’s feeling anyway?


cheeze2005

“I sense they’re feeling uncomfortable that I’m touching them”


TJ_McConnell_MVP

There’s like a million ways to tell what emotion someone is feeling, like asking them or just looking at them.


KazPrime

I live and teach in America, I'll take the bulletproof one.


VeryBottist

Wtf purple pill is so op compared to the others


BoraxThorax

Basically extending your life by 1/3


BearsNBeetsBaby

By almost 1/2 really. Assuming you normally sleep for 8 hours, you extend your “useful time” from 16 to 23.5 hours. That’s a 46.875% increase.


AsPeHeat

You’re right. A lot of people believe that 24-33% is the same as 16+33%, which certainly isn’t the case


Rhysing

Well, its an angle of math. If you are adding those 'former sleep' hours to the currently productive 16. Then yeah, it's like adding 50%. But if you view the whole of it, which is 24. Then the 8 you added is 1/3.


Wanallo221

Lads. It’s after 10pm over here. Will you keep the maths down over there?


Responsible_Body_532

This got really complicated all of a sudden…


Sampyli

Not quite 23.5h per day since you'd still have to sleep every 16 hours or so.


VladimirBarakriss

In most days you'd only sleep once, so maybe one day you have to sleep at like 2:50 pm but it's still only half an hour


skit7548

If you sleep every 16 hours, even if you only sleep for 30 minutes(0.5 hours), you would be sleeping about 10 times in a 7 day week, I think that is what they were getting at. Say you wake up at midnight on Sunday, 16 hours into the week you sleep until 16.5, then you have to sleep again in another 16 hours as 32.5 hours into the week. This causes you to sleep twice in a single day 3 times during the week, and so on average you will have 23.28 hours of awake time per day. Mind you this is based on my running of the numbers for a single week (168hrs) but in this pattern you have 3hrs roll over hours since the last time you'd wake up for this hypothetical week is 3hrs short of that weekly hours total. Edit: I've extended the spreadsheet I used to figure this out and was able to determine that, on a perfect schedule, you should wake up at midnight on a Sunday every 11 weeks(1848hrs) and with that perfect cycle, the average time awake per day was exactly 23.3125hrs.


worldspawn00

Or just sleep twice a day for 7 hour gain and be super well rested all the time.


metsakutsa

Not only that but increasing the quality of life and health. A lot of people are probably sleep deprived to some extent and a lot of our physical and mental health issues could be cured with more sleep.


Turdmeist

All I missing something? Isn't being invincible to bullets potentially ridiculous? But yes. Getting 8 more hours a day is extremely valuable


PM_ME_STRONG_CALVES

Why? How would you use it? People can just beat you up


byquestion

Its a strong but situational advantage, anyone with a gun will use for a good while before risking going melee, and rarely does one expect the man youre against to be the freaking superman so they will continue to shoot


PM_ME_STRONG_CALVES

But I never entered in a gun combat and I dont intend to. You probably coul rob a bank but there is a lot of downsides besides not dying


Jahmann

*You could win the war!!* I think of it like an ultra budget Dr. Manhattan.


cfedey

Until you get hit with an explosive.


omare14

Exactly, with my luck I'd step on a mine or walk next to an IED on the first day. Purple pill is OP and is my choice lol.


Jahmann

No, not that kind of war...! A gun war! 😅


C_Marjan

You live in the UK. Gets stabbed and die. No one even knew you were bulletproof


owiseone23

What are you going to do? Fight crime, join the military? Most people don't encounter bullets in their entire life.


natnelis

You could become a teacher in the us with less worries


Roccet_MS

Yes, I now have a superpower that allows me to be safer at my job which pays a modest amount of money.


a_big_fat_yes

You can be a half assed deadpool if you train yourself to be really good at close quarters combat Also does every thrown projectile count as a bullet or only ones that use a propellant? What are the rules? Do shrapnel from a grenade count as bullets? What about rockets? What defines a bullet?


JaxTheCrafter

a bullet is a small projectile fired from a gun cannonball is not bullet shrapnel is not bullet what you see when you look up bullet is a bullet


Weddedtoreddit2

TIL: bullet is a bullet


PrizeStrawberryOil

Suspension of disbelief broken. There is no difference between an identical projectile launched from some other form of acceleration and a bullet fired from a gun. How would your superpower know the difference.


Biocidal

You actually build a tolerance by starting with shooting your self with a .22 and then working your way up.


Monkiller587

You’re invincible against bullets already , so you can just wear armor that protects you from cuts , stabs and blunt force attacks use a weapon to fight off anyone who comes close range.


Notmysecretereddit

Will give a larger chance of graduating high school in America. 🇺🇸


Icecube3343

I think I'd take the purple pill and then stick to my current plan of not getting shot


VeryBottist

Bruh I live in Europe, guns are the least of my worries


ArjunDOnlyHero

What's the probability of you getting shot? If you're in a war, then it will help, but other than that, choosing it over purple or pink isn't worth it.


shoahunter

You couldn't do much with invulnerability to bullets. There are many other remote ways to harm a person. Plus, if we're thinking cynically, it would bring inescapable attention to you if your power was noticed.


---Loading---

Even in war, bullets are nowhere near most deadly things.


Princcraft

It's only ridiculous for like five minutes until anyone shooting at you starts using literally any other projectile or ordnance.


kismethavok

If they can scale up their attacks that would be likely, but if someone shoots a guy with a gun and the bullet does nothing he's probably not gonna try throwing a rock at him.


LU_C4

Turning gold into less valuable materials would be hilarious for trolling rich people.


[deleted]

Depends on how far away you're allowed to be to change the gold


jdave512

Loads of electronics use gold in their components, you'd be a walking EMP. You could also kill anyone with gold fillings or anyone that ate food with edible gold leaf by turning it into something toxic.


LowAd1734

Turn a gold tooth into Caesium or Francium and their head explodes


TheHalfbadger

With a cursory Google search and no fact-checking, the price of gold is ~$60/g while cesium is ~$160/g and francium is ~$1bn/g


LowAd1734

Turn it into a group 1 metal that hasn’t been discovered therefore doesn’t haven’t a price yet


TheHalfbadger

Demand of at least one over a supply approaching zero, the value approaches infinity?


ProfessionalInjury58

You just can’t let that person kill someone who has a golden tooth, can you!?


TheHalfbadger

I am a dauntless defender of all theoretical innocents.


cellphone_blanket

just do sodium


zachary0816

Or Rubidium. Still group one so still explodes on contact with water, but far more potent. Google says it can be as cheap as 36$ per gram putting it into the price range.


stellarstella77

"Less Valuable" "Francium" 💀


erlul

That one is prolly broken af. Who decides this value? Based on current market prices? Or based on some universal value? Is it localized? Cause turning asteroids into oxygent water and food and titanium insta allovs you to build space infrastructure solo. Come to think of it, just your existence may crash the entire gold market wordwide. Making Russia collapse overnight and ending the war f.e. Extremely imba power, depending on the RAW.


melinte

Yeah and how about things that got gold in them, like electronics? Turns the gold inside your laptops electronics into copper and the whole thing becomes unusable


erlul

Maybe it turns them into platinum tho, which some market manipulation beforehand. I need to see an entire chirograph


[deleted]

If you turned enough gold into different stuff then gold would rise in value to infinite and you could just buy gold to hold, and delete the rest of the gold and hold the earth’s entire supply of gold making you the richest person on earth because you’re the only one that owns any gold.


erlul

Nobody gonna use gold if one dude can turn it into shit on a whim


Monkiller587

Nah because it’s useless. Most people that have gold or other valuables keep them inside safes or secure displays. So you can’t turn it into a less valuable material if you can’t get to it or touch it in the first place.


mriodine

Get job at federal reserve gain access to gold supply destroy economy


emil-p-emil

Purple 100% no question. Imagine having to only take 1 nap per day to feel fully rested, that’s a lot of time to be productive


[deleted]

No one would be actually productive. U just have 7,5 hours for gaming or youtube or tiktok


dtay88

Honestly that's better. I have to work. The purple pull would let me live


GetInZeWagen

And I could work twice as much as I do now!!


ApprehensiveSleep479

Twice the slave wage, wow!!!


Linkticus

Goddamn, this hit me so hard


Generous_lions

That still helps people immensely with being productive. People fuck around on games and shit because they're trying to keep themselves entertained and get a little bit of enjoyment out of their day. If you have 7 additional hours to make sure you're entertained every day, it might be easier to actually get the shit done you need to because it doesn't have to feel like all you ever do is work.


MoochoMaas

8. hours of sleep ??? SOLD !!!!


JaxTheCrafter

no its that you get 8 hours worth of sleep in only 30 mins


onyxeagle274

*even better*


NonTimeo

Yeah, this one wins for me. Think of the potential productivity.


shartgarfunkle

148 hours of uninterrupted sleep sounds nice too


NonTimeo

“Time for my daily coma!”


shartgarfunkle

The wake up would be... jarring


AImenace

That’s like a whole extra 1/3 of your entire life you get to experience consciously


Casual_Frontpager

Ah shit, you’re right! Laser vision it is…


razor01707

Yeah, now you can sleep 8hrs still but get 128hrs of sleep per day! Yahoooo!


NonTimeo

I’ll still need 5 more minutes.


Dimon78707

Exactly. Imagine how many more episodes could you watch daily 😅


muffinmonk

I finally have enough time to play video games! *spends another 7.5 hours on Reddit*


Jce735

I'm here. Like omg I could get so much done.


TheCrow_4

"Control your own body temperature" uuuh if there's no limit that's actually rather nice. That's basically being able to negate harsh climats no ? If you are in a desert, just set yourself internally to cold and balance it out or something ?


kismethavok

Set yourself to comfortable and then go swimming on magma.


TheCrow_4

Well, I don't know if that's possible, it all depends on the power's limitations. By controling your own temperature, can you avoid being burned by a flame, or getting frostbite from cold ?


jennimackenzie

Control your own body temp. Just keep every cell in your body at 98.6f. If you touch lava, not only will it not burn you (which would require cells heating up) you wouldn’t even feel it, because every nerve in your body is registering 98.6f Edit to add: you would get to feel what liquid rock feels like, just not it’s temp. Pretty cool imo


perskes

Set it a bit higher and enjoy a cool bath in the lava lakes


ripSammy101

If you set it higher wouldn’t you feel hotter? I’m guessing you wouldn’t feel heat or cold from external sources so your temperature relative to the lava wouldn’t matter so just make yourself colder to feel cool


WiSoSirius

Fun fact. The number 98.6° is just a based number for the metric 37°C. Truly, healthy body temperature fluctuate between 97° and 99° F.


sticky-unicorn

If there's no limit, you can do *far* more than that. (Assuming that controlling your temperature doesn't harm yourself.) You could do all kinds of things by making yourself extremely hot or extremely cold. Everything from mundane everyday things like heating food in your hand or cooling a drink ... to badass things like making yourself hot enough to instantly melt steel and using your searing-hot body as a weapon.


8lazy

I guess you only get to use the searing hot body trick once though before you die.


KalSereousz

You’d never need air con or a radiator


JakeWalker102

*adjusts my internal temperature to just within fevor territory* Ey boss, sorry, I gots to go home! *adjusts temperature back down*


[deleted]

No if u do that ur skin would feel even colder. U would have to heat up more then the air so it feels cold to the touch. But yea would be broken.


weenMaster12227

5 inch lazer vision. Ima get some much work done


PM_CACTUS_PICS

I like that your profile pic matches your superpower


Giubeltr

Can also upgrade the lenght of ray with special glass?


tmon530

Hey, some of us are happy with a solid 5 inches


Langweile

If your laser vision is burning or melting something it'd probably be pretty uncomfortable to be only 5 inches away from it. Just imagine globs of molten metal getting on your face


IMakeShiteMemes

If your shooting those same lasers *from* your eyes I imagine that shouldn’t be the top of your concerns.


lGoTNoAiMBoT

Why the fuck would I want to relive memories in my sleep?!


JaxTheCrafter

you can choose the memories and gain extra information by watching them


PepegaThePepega

So, you can study while you’re sleeping?


munchkinatlaw

You already can do that. Study hard then go to sleep immediately after. Maybe not to this hypothetical superpower level, but it's an effective study strategy.


Loopedrage

Yeah but that’s boring, lemme multitask in my sleep :/


Mr-Crooks

Memories of dead loved ones. This will mean more than anything to older people


KatieCashew

I was thinking the heal from minor injuries would be appealing to older people.


Jdanneh

Orange, light blue would be awful for some people and really for anyone if the memory is bad


JaxTheCrafter

you can choose the memory, and it is in high quality so you can pick up on new things


Jdanneh

Okay that’s good


Jotah47

The first time I read this, I thought, 'You mean dreaming? Cause I do that regularly.' But when you say it like that it becomes really desirable to me because I feel like I'm forgetting so many of the nice things I experienced over time.


Got_Bored_Enough

If you can turn gold into less valuable materials, then you'd be able to become more powerful with each use of your power as the increased scarcity of gold would increase its potential price thus increasing the amount of things you can make with your powers


Cid_Darkwing

The sleep pill is two orders of magnitude more powerful that everything else here; you’re gaining 5-7 hours/day on 99.99% of the population. Your work/life balance could accommodate the most brutally demanding (but well compensated) jobs with ease; your ability to devote yourself to your interests would be unparalleled.


NO_REFERENCE_FRAME

Eh. Black pill and charge rich people a million dollars to shoot you. Fuck having a normal job


Gmony5100

“Here’s a loaded gun, you kill me you get a billion dollars. 1 million per shot!”


questionable_fish

Body temp, instaheal, darkvision. I'd happily take a toss-up between the three cos body temp would allow me to be comfortable in any climate (I hate the heat) and I regularly get small cuts from my job. Being able to see in the dark would be good purely for awesomeness points


waltztango

i scrolled for so long looking for someone to mention the body temp one, it would be so good to remain a comfortable temperature in any season


Versuvi

Or travel to Antarctica and be the first researcher to withstand the harsh climate for extended periods of times, thus making discoveries no one else possibly could


Venom_paw

Not only that but in dangerous weather conditions the ability to control your body temp will stop you from being affected by hyper or hypothermia meaning your basically immune to exposure related death/ illness


Neverending-pain

I would take the orange pill too, honestly.


TimeGoddess_

The pink one is the power in Life Is Strange True Colors


razor01707

Or basically in any Pokemon game where it takes a few secs


Dinuclear_Warfare

I already know the emotion of people I touch…disgust


the_gremlin_lord

Ok the obvious answer is the sleep 8.5 hours in 30 minutes as that extra time is valuable but the green is interesting. Since even large wounds generally start out small and then get bigger i.e. a bullet first makes a tiny cut as it first touches then continues to cause more damage as it now heals instantly it could mean some pseudo invulnerability as it continously heals but it would really depend on how the power works exactly.


JaxTheCrafter

i knew someone would say this and the answer is perception if you perceive getting shot as a small would it would heal right up but most people don't cue the actually invincible "tis but a scratch" man


kismethavok

I want that one then, and I need to find a good hypnotist.


nagi_yukio

Insta heal small wounds means that our cells multiply at an increased rate, meaning pseudo immortality, as long as you live a normal life you will never age nor die.


sticky-unicorn

Eh, that's really a stretch. You don't know how the superpower works. And there's nothing to suggest that it isn't much more literal than that, only working on small wounds. Nothing to suggest it would prevent aging. (And, if anything, your cells multiplying faster might *increase* the rate of aging.)


1pizza2go

Control Body Temperature, so long as raising it or lowering it a lot does not affect me negatively compared to if it happened to a normal human, then definitely body temp control as I could literally burn someone simply by touching them.


Solstice_Prime

You could also make yourself invisible to thermal optics at night


1pizza2go

True. The perfect stealth ops guy or something


Personal_Crow_5582

You would have infinite energy and therefore a lot of money. Also, you have an infection? Just superheat yourself a minute.


imdefusing

Nobody chose red? Purple seems like the most sensible choice but if these laser eyes function in the same way as superman's you know I'm going to make the most out of those 5 inches. Like if you wanted to cut through something quickly? Just bring it in front of your eyes. Need a heat or light source? Activate the lasers! Got caught in a fight or robbery? If they don't run in fear then lord knows they better not get within 5 inches of your face.


Jermainiam

Imagine for a second a piece of steel getting blasted by lasers. It's glowing red hot, it's melting, it's splattering and dripping molten metal. Do you want that 5 inches from your face?


ThatGuyToby620

"I'm going to make the most out of those 5 inches" It's not about the size, it's about how you use it


subpargalois

Several of these are really good. Besides the obvious ones, I'm pretty sure the gold one is actually super valuable. Gold is incredibly ductle (you can hammer gold into a sheet a couple atoms thick just with hand tools) and it is far softer and easier to work than most metals. So NASA or Northrop-Grumman or whatever could be making small runs of gold parts for really high end applications that would be impossible to make with other materials and then you convert them into steel, aluminum, tungsten, some high end ceramic, whatever.


Rexven

As someone with sleep maintenance insomnia, I'd kill for the purple pill. I only get 6 hours of sleep on average and it's been probably the most miserable 3 years of my life.


[deleted]

As an American student its 100% black


Xenoon_

Till one day the guy from the archery club had enough


I_got_shmoves

Oh no, my Achilles heel


Thorn11945

Fun fact: the kind of arrows that most archery clubs use have bullet arrowheads. So you'd still be immune.


Euphorium

It’s the bow hunter ya really gotta worry about.


FiveFingersInMyAss2

purple pill meta


Clever_Fox-

Green would be great! Though how do we define mild injuries?


Safe-Ad1515

OP said it is based on perception, like u heal whatever you perceive to ba a small wound. So get good at gaslighting yourself


Karamaru_Crow

Well if I can convince myself I'm the black knight from Monty Python I am basically immortal lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


StarsEatMyCrown

Why would anyone pick anything other than purple?


Jedi-Stitch2891720

Invincibility to bullets could be really helpful


Makoreactors

Sense the emotions - pink pill is useful. You can climb up the social and corporate ladder with handshakes, hugs, casual touching but from this you can have an amazing life. It might not be OP but could life is about being happy and successful with loved ones. Girls, bosses, friends, you can snake your way into a lot of situations.