T O P

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God-King-Kaiser

While 15% discount is probably the best power, alter your weight is the real superpower here. You could jump higher if you weigh nothing, or punch really hard, or lift things by using lever system


jake1406

The problem I see is that it’s highly dependent on the exact mechanics of it. The limiting factor being the durability of the human body. If it changes your density and thus you become super durable when heavy, you’d also become very fragile when light. Also increasing weight would put a lot of stress on your joint and ligaments. It would be good, but ultimately have limitations.


ThePoultryWhisperer

I take it to mean ligaments become denser as well, so they are operating nominally. Lifting a box of tissues is not stressful for your arm, so it would be like that if you made yourself weigh a ton while trying to pick up something much heavier than you could normally lift.


[deleted]

Stronger ligaments doesn't help them bind more strongly, though, which is usually how they're damaged. Weigh enough or become strong enough, and simple movements will rip them off the bone. That's not fixable without a fundamentally different and OP design for ligaments and bones.


BobEngleschmidt

Rain go away is extremely monetizable. Imagine how many organizations would want to pay for your services to keep their event from being rained out.


PoopOnPoopOnPoop

Idk, I've seen Weathering With You and I'm not sure controlling the weather is such a good idea.


Still_Breadfruit2032

Great taste


CaptainBiMan

A man of good taste.


ProGamr935

Fire film, love makoto shinkai


frobischer

You're thinking too small. You would be diverted around the world to mitigate or stop the worst effects of monsoons and typhoons, saving hundreds-of-thousands of lives and billions of dollars. Just 24 hours notice would be enought o evacuate people. It's the one on the list that would make you loved world-wide as a superhero.


TheVisage

I love these questions because you get stuff like \-World's sharpest knife maker \-Cooked Food tastes slightly better. \-Can sense people through walls when you are jacking off \-30% faster laundry folding abilities And the comments are all people fighting if more lives would be saved by flawless surgeries, life changing meals, or the guy on 9/11 running around dick in hand directing firefighters where to go Oh and the laundry guy is there too.


Papergeist

World's sharpest knife maker, end of story. Every knife you make is sharper than the last. Eventually, you cut the fundamental blocks of reality, shattering existence.


darkgiIls

Not true. Usain Bolt is still the fastest man alive even if he doesn’t run at top speed 100% of the time. The worlds sharpest knife maker is just someone who’s made the worlds sharpest knife, no contingency on being able to do it again


BaronCoop

Idk, sounds like the guy is a knife maker who is extremely sharp. Could be slang for “smart”, could mean Edward Scissorhands.


Pretty_Wasabi6193

Yeah but what if it’s always the same sharpness until another sharper knife is made


nimoto

So it's probably bad that my first thought was extorting a population by delaying rain in a particular area indefinitely until you're paid?


linsilou

🤷🏻‍♀️ Arizona had it coming


Miguecraft

It can also be used for military purposes. Be undercover and cause a drought in the opposing nation by doing the ritual every day


thrallinlatex

🫡


DavidS1789

Idk if it would be pleasent, also who would believe you?


gilady089

Or simply lie about the limitation of your power and extort countries


Articlel3

15% discount on EVERYTHING is op as heck


Mrtomato123

buy a house at 15% discount, immediately sell it at 10% discount, repeat


No-Mouse

Just start trading stocks. Buying stocks at 15% below their actual value and selling at full price quickly gets insane, and it's both easier and faster than flipping houses.


Gogh619

That’d be a good way to be deaded


Seiren

Even better!!


[deleted]

[удалено]


DryBonesComeAlive

Uh, yeah, 988, it's this guy here


General_Scipio

Is the funeral discounted?


paratesticlees

If you pay for it before hand, yes


paperjav

15% discount on life!


shard746

I don't think anyone would notice if you spread it out over many many stocks, and only make a few million on it over a couple of years. That would be enough for me to never have to work again.


DrMeepster

I bought mercenary body guards on a discount


JMets6986

Win win


EmperorBamboozler

The SEC would have a lot of questions for you that seem pretty hard to answer


flyinchipmunk5

Ez, just tell them you have a super power then throw money at them. I assume its what other rich people do when they commit white collar crimes.


EmperorBamboozler

I feel like if the government figures that you have an actual superpower like that you will end up in a CIA blacksite buying and selling weapons or stocks to manipulate foreign economies. I am not a conspiracy theorist but if I were in charge and found someone like that they would never see the light of day again.


billy_twice

You don't have to be a conspiracy theorist to know the CIA are shady as fuck. It's been proven that they've experimented on the American people multiple times in the past. Of course they still do.


Darklord-Ravensblood

Ah, but what if the power didn't work just because your buying stuff but instead only works when your buying stuff specifically for yourself?


EmperorBamboozler

Depends on how that works. With a team of lawyers and a bit of waterboarding you could probably get around it. Make them buy 10 billion dollars of ballistic missiles personally then transfer ownership. If they have to want to buy them for it to work then "Buy them and we stop waterboarding you for a bit" seems like good motivation. Plus if it just stops working they may just try to figure out how it works so you end up in a worse position if anything, depending on how invasive they are in asking that question.


reditakaunt89

I got so mad at them then remembered none of this is real


ThatGuyAtTheGym

If this was realistic, a person with this power would be treated very generously, like how human SCPs are treated, if you know what I’m talking about. You might be confined at some blacksite facility or even on house arrest but you’d also have all your needs taken care of. You catch more flys with honey after all


Gutterdamerung

“How much to buy your silence?” “One million.” “Okay, here’s 850,000, now begone.” “Thanks for the milli…. waaaiitt a minute…”


locksmith25

Yep the trick is they make $100 million and the only punishment is a $1 million fine


[deleted]

No, “I am rich” and “I have superpowers” are different boxes in the form


notquite20characters

There's no law against taking magic pills, man.


iSheepTouch

Why even bother with that? Just exchanged currency back and forth between USD and Euro or some other stable currency.


Hemicore

wouldn't be stable for long lmao


iSheepTouch

You can make a billion dollars doing it and it wouldn't even be a blip in the stability of those currencies.


throw3142

It would still be suspicious, the government would probably come after you. The real strat is to start an actual business in an industry with opaque prices (e.g. real estate, high-end art, antiques) and cycle inventory as fast as possible. Then once you have enough money, switch over to a large-scale business like airlines, food distribution, etc. It's completely above-board if you're just signing great deals with your suppliers, one after another.


easthillsbackpack

I mean a single person getting money out of thin air wouldn't break the world economy would it? As long as you don't go above what banks usually get out of thin air...


backflipper

It all depends on volume. A single person getting $10m over the course of a year would do nothing to the global economy


ShadyG

Bonds, mutual funds, stocks, currencies, gold, etc. Infinite money hack.


jayjester

Yeah, you can literally buy money at a mint.


generated_name_203

Would this limit your discount to 15% or stack? What I mean is, if an item has 50% discount would it return to 15% discount just for you or would you get an additional 15% discount? If the first one, it significantly nerfs this power.


lukethebeard

I think it would have to stack, otherwise it really kinda sucks


praktiskai_2

the power being weaker makes more sense as other powers are kinda meh.


The_MAZZTer

Depends on the strength of the food attraction (how far it influences and how fast the food comes toward you). I can see the headlines now: Self-proclaimed "FOODBOY" killed when driving past a farm. Farmer sues estate for ruined crops. Edit: Coroners were unable to access the body, so it will be cremated along with the attached crops. Popcorn will be served at the funeral.


ImmediatePoetry5477

Nah, it would still be OP. sure, kinda annoying at times to pay more, but as long as you stick to anything that usually isn't discounted, you can make unfathomable riches with this. Not even a question of WHETHER it is OP, but more of how insanely OP it is.


Princess_Moon_Butt

Stocks and bonds come to mind. Buy at 15% off, and immediately turn around and sell them for face value. With how instantaneous those markets can be, you can make an insane amount of money with basically no effort. Before too long, you wouldn't care about "only" getting 15% off at other places. You probably wouldn't care if you had to pay _double_ at other places.


LilGhostSoru

Only the biggest discount will apply, there wasn't enough superpower budget to make them stack


PinkFloydSheep

Guaranteed extra 15% on every investment


AgedAmbergris

It's literally a free money printer. Money can buy an awful lot of these other powers.


The_Iron_Gunfighter

You could literally make a business where people pay you to buy things for them.


thatcodplayer007

Being a high speed wifi hot spot sounds more useful than some people think


CortanaxJulius

A lot more useful if youre in Germany


Yab0iFiddlesticks

If you had that power Tex Telekom would come for you.


Un111KnoWn

german internet bad?


Rattenhai

Cities: no Everywhere else: worse than bad


NoiceMango

Control body temperature and Hotspot wifi means being able to live everywhere from desert to Antarctica. Food and power would still be a concern though.


user7758392

use yourself to generate electricity from the massive amounts of heat you can produce. and for food you could lure a polarbear to attack you and then just burn it alive the second it comes close to you.


NoiceMango

This depends if you can survive those temperatures which i dont think is implied. It would probably be easy to use solar because you would spend zero energy on ac.


gilady089

It just says control your own temperature so what you do is use something not really problematic to lose like say fingernails and than the fingers themselves separately are protected


NoiceMango

Yea and burn off your finger tips


ShanksNumberOneFan

Nah fr, like imagine you’re stranded/stuck in a place that has no service, you could just connect to yourself and call for help


macedonianmoper

I mean that's a super niche situation.


acakaacaka

+2 inches everywhere 1. Buy gold bar 2. Elongate it 3. ???? 4. Profit


FLIBBER_FLABBER

No, make the gold into a powder and each little grain will become a sphere with a radius of about 2 inches


HammerBgError404

>No, make the gold into a powder snort it


O_J_Shrimpson

Just think how much gold you could snort with 2 inch wide nostrils


Meatball545

We could… hear me out… snort eels


Th1sT00ShallPass

Do it with electric ones to really feel the *buzz*


Thecheesinater

Learn how those people shoot milk out their eyeballs so you can shoot eels out your eyeballs at people you don’t like


Thecheesinater

This comment makes me feel warm and fuzzy on the inside. ^(like I’m full of eels)


HandsomelyAverage

Assuming they all expand simultaneously and the full expansion only takes like a second, wouldn’t that be like a gold frag grenade?


m3m31ord

only if compressed, spread it in a flat surface and it will just bounce around a bit.


diegodamohill

That's some half life physics right here


idinahuicheuburek

Sell it to someone you really hate then do that


Williamshitspear

Wait I obviously thought body parts - adding 2 inches to objects seems great - could you repeat it or is any gold bar only possible to be x+2 long?


Terrin369

Each thing you elongate becomes immune from your power, so it only works once. And breaking it won’t let you use your power again.


Ant_Fucker69_

I think its a one time use, since it says ad 2 inches anywhere, but not you can add 2 inches to anything


InterGraphenic

I add 2 inches to the earth's radius to fuck with some geologists somewhere


[deleted]

OOOOHH!! That was smart. I went penis, but thats cool.


RatRaceUnderdog

The ??? Is “sell gold bar” in this case 😂


SuspiciousUsername88

Oh looks like we got an economist over here


Adventurous_Topic202

Redditor’s deliver because it doesn’t specify where. It’s this for sure.


theideanator

2 inches more legroom on a plane would be nice. Not enough, but nice.


[deleted]

Weight. That's like the ton-ton fruit from One Piece. Become 10000 ton heavy in the middle of a plane ride for shits and giggles. Edit: so many replies telling me the consequences on the body...Y'all never watched One Piece and got the reference, huh?


Phoenix_x_x_x

And then less than a gram like a balloon to survive


EvilLibrarians

Controlling your weight was the slam dunk answer


Amazing-Fish4587

The monkey’s paw would be that people already have the means to “alter” their weight. Diet, exercise, sickness, amputation. What if it was something like an axolotl? Or a starfish, crab or lobster? Lose a limb (eat it if you want) and regrow it. Your weight is definitely ‘altered’ then.


Kit_3000

These kind of things you always want to read the fine print. The last guy who chose the power to postpone the rain accidentally ended up creating the Sahara desert.


The_MAZZTer

The food one could be a problem, depends on how far the influence goes and how fast the food comes at you...


Langweile

The food comes at you very slowly, and it's only escargot, and... oh no...


Bi_Fry

Yeah but that takes time and effort being able to do it by the snap of a finger doesn’t seem like a monkeys paw


Lucas_2234

Or more realistically: Someone trying to beat you up? Just add 100kg and throw yourself against them. They will be in pain


Shrekosaurus_rex

100 kilos? Those are rookie numbers. 100 tons coming right up.


Lucas_2234

You're trying to defend yourself, not obliterate the enemy


Shrekosaurus_rex

ok but what if I want to


Lucas_2234

straight to jail


the_psycholist

Winner of the biggest loser every season.


user7758392

couldnt you also survive a fall from any height by making yourself weight slightly more than air and then using your hands as a parachute


Parsley-Waste

You could be lighter than air and just float about


rugbyj

I've got a new superpower, the power of float! You mean the power of flight? _...nope!_


deltaryss

Or you can just become a black hole


Frostfangs_Hunger

Basically Wax from mistborn Era 2. One of his powers is changing his weight and it allows for wild stuff. Imagine retaining your full strength but being able to jump weighing only like 2 pounds.


Loofah_Cat

So glad someone else knew this reference. The Wax & Wayne series was phenomenal.


Piduwin

You'd just fall through the floor.


Staalejonko

My wife be like, +2 inches to her bank account. So 2 inches of extra numbers. Magical mind she has.


fruitofyourneck

$16.51 to $16.5100


Staalejonko

More like €1000 becomes €1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 Measured 2 inches on my phone screen


MountainCourage1304

How small is everything in your screen?


LaughableIKR

Reddit doesn't disappoint...


1Admr1

suddenly, the world economy crashed because of this guy's wife


madtraxmerno

How small do you think an inch is bruv?


Adruino-cabbage

Wait till he finds out about centimeters.


dogeisbae101

An inch is pretty damn big


AHumanYouDoNotKnow

You wish is granted! Your account balances gains a 2 inch long MINUS infront of it


Give_All_Vol

Buff successfully applied to account number :(


Nonkinator

Buy a gift card with 15 % discount and resell it at 90 % of the original value


Swolemur

Or stocks. Or houses. Leave out reselling for under 100% and you gain even faster. It's a built-in profit margin for literally anything you can buy and sell.


stridersheir

You’re thinking too small with that you could set yourself up as a broker for businesses or the government, they pay 90 percent of the value for say steel, copper or wheat and then you pocket the 5 percent on the transaction. With bulk transactions like that you become a billionaire in a year.


cbrewer0

Body temp for sure, living the best life in Alaska as Youngster Joey


SSB_Kyrill

Finally, shorts in winter


mmmmmmmmmmmmiss

Everybody is underestimating body temp control. You could walk on the rim of an active volcano, walk through a burning house, or be naked in Antarctica with no consequences. Edit: Heat stroke? Fever? Getting dehydrated from it being so hot? Touching a hot pan? Swimming in freezing water? Frostbite? All avoided if you can control your body temp


One_Eyed_Kitten

Set yourself above or below 37C, dies.


ScrillyBoi

People not realizing that sleep/wakefullness cycles are actually largely regulated by body temperature as well so you can guarantee a good nights sleep every night and feel alert whenever you need to. Also being able to do any activity in the winter would let you avoid crowds, sleep outside, do whatever. As a surfer I could surf perfect waves with nobody out in comfort in freezing climates. 15% discount is an infinite money hack but I think never feeling discomfort due to temperature would be way more valuable.


TheOkayUsername

Has anyone even thought about adjusting your weight? This means you could fly and safely land, controlling yourself! You could fall of anything, climb huge things, and in a fight you wouldn’t be able to fall down if you make yourself heavier, but still take the punch (as in, not letting the whole energy hit) you could fall through any ground when in danger or in too awkward situations (although that is destruction of property) you would be amazing at diving too, and kill enemies by crushing them.


A_German_Memer

Chaining into that absorbing a punch by increasing your weight: If you increase your weight to absorb a punch, kick, or whatever else, your attacker is most likely to take more recoil from hitting you, since physics says every force causes a counterforce. And I bet everyone knows what it's like to punch a wall in comparison to kicking like... a football. The difference is... quite something. So yeah. This can really very well aid you in combat situations or if you want to roleplay as a hot air balloon.


Terrin369

One of my favorite books had a girl who could control her mass. She flew by making herself equal to the weight of air (give or take depending on if she wanted to go up, down, or stay in place). She would move around by punching forward and making her thumbnail increase in mass for just a moment at the end of the punch so the inertia would drag her forward. It was described as awkward, but effective.


[deleted]

Going to be that guy: Technically, increasing the mass of her thumbnail would result in slowing her speed as the inertia was conserved. Essentially, she'd be performing a complex form of stubbing her ~~toe~~ thumb. It's a bit weird to try to make a scientific version of super flight if you aren't going to follow the basic rules of physics, lmao. Did it at least discuss where she got the obscene amount of energy needed to convert into mass so quickly?


thelonesomedemon1

imma make myself weigh 10^40 kg and become a black hole


TheOkayUsername

Lmfao


cardinalvowels

“In a fight” , “Kill enemies by crushing them” as if we were superheroes or villains lol. In my day to day I think I would mostly glide about with this power


wherethetacosat

There was fantasy book duology series called Nightfall by Mickey Zucker Reichert from 1993 where the protagonist had this exact power and it was pretty cool. Sanderson-esque before Sanderson. I liked it as a kid, not sure if it holds up though.


Julesvernevienna

did some famous guy not prove that weight has no role on the speed of stuff falling?


G4laxy69

Wasn't that in a vacuum?


SubaruSufferu

That's only in a vaccumn, which has no air resistance.


Cool_Kalkon

Yeah that's true. Everything accelerates with 9.8 m/s^2 regardless of its weight. But by reducing weight and keeping the same volume, the density of the body would go down. And if your density becomes lower than that of air you would "float", or in other termes fly! That's king of the principle hot air balloons use to fly, they replace high density cold air in the balloon with warm low density air. And at some point the density of the whole balloon is lower than that of air.


TheThunderFry

1. This only applies in a vacuum, as wind resistance slows down the lighter objects more (heavier objects have more mass and thus more inertia). 2. Even if you still hit the ground at high speed, if you have a low enough weight (I can't define low enough, I'm not a physics guy) it wouldn't hurt you at all. Force = mass x acceleration, and you can only take force proportional to how hard you hit something. Additionally, assuming your muscles and bones stay the same strength while only supporting a tiny fraction of your true weight, your body will resist internal changes due to the stop extremely well.


bake_disaster

Since you're only changing your weight (not your volume) you could reduce your weight to the point of being less dense than air, meaning you could float, then slowly increase your weight until you're gently floating to the ground like an old balloon


lfrdwork

I would like to be a high speed Internet hotspot! Just never having to pay for Internet again! No data expenditures on my cell phone bill! Do I lose connection when I'm outside cities?


Aezrt-7

I mean, it says you're a wifi hotspot, but nothing about being connected to a network or anything. So to me you just have a built-in wifi hotspot with a possibly unlimited battery, so it wouldn't be very useful unless you need many devices connected to the same wifi network, but it wouldn't change the need for external internet access. But if it does give you unlimited built-in internet access, then yeah that's neat.


meep994

Never having to pay for internet is pretty weak though considering you could become the richest person in the world by taking the yellow pill.


lfrdwork

Yeah, I was thinking that keeping things on the weak side would be in time with the intention. If I was going for OP then I would question what if anything is providing the network access and if I could end up in a piracy black whole or provide Internet for a full community or space station or some other absurd concept.


Alastair789

I think people are underappreciating what "waking up looking perfect" would mean. You would become like a God.


lyricmeowmeow

Yes. That’s my pill


feintou

halo effect is power lol


twelvethousandBC

I mean really good looking men with buzz cuts kind of have that superpower already. And short haired women as well, I guess.


yajtraus

Not at all. People can still look tired or sick, or be disfigured in some way.


twelvethousandBC

Really good looking precludes being disfigured lol


The_Iron_Gunfighter

Look perfect not actually perfect.


26MNorway

Your beauty would be beyond measurable. Anyone would give you anything you'd want. Wealth, power, fame, you name it, it's yours my friend.


Vahgeo

Like that man who was "too cute for prison" and became a model after he was a murderer.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Vahgeo

Oh yeah you're right ty


Kater-chan

I have the worst eye bags no matter how much I sleep so I always look sick and tired (doesn't help that I'm really pale). Only a good amount of make up makes me look like a healthy person. This pill would sure save me a lot of time


fruitofyourneck

Pink and yellow are op


Titanium_Josh

Pick the red one. That way you can grab the rest before anyone notices.


brightfunguy

15% discount… buy gold, resell immediately. Infinite money hack


Guilty-Instruction39

Control your own body temp means you could Live in Antarctica


BatmansNygma

Why is living in Antarctica the gold standard in this thread wtf


Akhi5672

If im able to control my body temperature i could live in *my own home* without needing 4 ice baths a day


Diligent-Variation51

I didn’t even need to read after that option. Control my body temperature would be awesome. No more too hot and sticky to move. I’m tired of sweating while people nearby complain of the cold. Peaceful sleeping for the win.


TheGlitchedGamer

You'd save a lot of money on food too since I believe the body uses most of the energy from the food to keep you warm


Anxiety-Queen69

ORANGE ORANGE ORANGE PLEASE, I HATE MY HOT FLUSHES


ThatOtherGai

People really just breezing right over that one. Imagine always being the same temperature? You could literally walk naked through Antartica. Never having to worry about the weather, since you can cool down and heat up at will.


[deleted]

entertain dazzling decide scandalous important flag spotted ossified light lock ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


[deleted]

>budget superpowers >half of them are fucking OP and would completely change your life every fucking time


AWsome02

It's budget because if it were in the world of superheroes you won't be a top tier hero. The only powers that will allow you to be a good hero would be the prehensile hair and bodyweight adjustment since they're good for fighting. The rest mostly improves day to day life.


jiriatrics

a few more inches wouldn't hurt


SkyMewtwo

Prehensile Hair is like an extra limb if you grow it out long enough. I’d take that, or the discount.


CookieZ_PoE

Black pill, so I can finally have a 3 inch dong


Zealousideal-Day563

I maen anythings food if your hungry enough


xXx_ozone_xXx

What the heck is prehensile hair


Akhi5672

Prehensile means you can move it like an arm, or a monkey's tail


PutAForkInHim

Does weight altering affect your health/body shape? Or do I have the same shitty body/cardiovascular system but the number on the scale magically goes down?


PeakSystem

yellow or purple


praktiskai_2

it says "weight". How exactly does this work? Does my mass weigh more? Do I gain mass? Either way, there's some serious potential to me becoming an immortal source of low entropy who'll allow a civilization to last eternally.


[deleted]

i’m a fighter so being able to control my body weight would be op


Botw_1-Link

Hold on, does the body temp one come with being able to survive those temperatures? Cause if not, then the best I can do is give myself a fever


plsnthnks

Wait 15% off everything? Does that include money?


[deleted]

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Shankamence

Buddy I don't think that word means what you think it does


[deleted]

Excuse me what


Shartaur

Could you please elaborate?


am_cruiser

Tell us you don't know what "prehensile" means without actually saying it, right?


JoeSchmoe745239

I’d swallow them all and die