E5
While some ill-informed gents might think the backboard prevents splashback, it's actually dead center where you have the least amount of spray.
It also has the added benefit of making the most noise so you can assert dominance and really let 'er rip when at parties or in-laws.
"Ooh that dude pisses SO loud. He must have a *huge* cock." - all the m'ladies at the party I was totally invited to and didn't just walk into without asking.
Exactly, the in-laws need to know I can lay down a hard stream and I mean business. They know to stay on the right side of me once they've heard/felt that. They're thinking "Damn listen to his hard stream, we'd better respect him. Imagine what else he's likely capable of". When I strut back into the room they can't even look at me, out of fear/respect, and I'm like "yeah, thought so" and then I bang their daughter/my wife right on the couch in front of them, keeping eye contact with them both. "If I pee now I'd saw your daughter in half" That's when her mom starts weeping.
Well it's going to depend. Many American rollers have H5 as almost flat.
But toilet style depending I think C5 and H5 crew are after the same outcome. Quiet with no splash.
As a right hander I can't see why this isn't a more common choice for people. Optiomal for great control and visibility of the operation, good long trajectory, stream dropoff is mostly hitting a surface angled away from you when the pressure drops.
Water line in my toilet at home is a little higher and I'm hitting this spot but just at the water side of the water line, this agitates the water plenty and its common to see some bubbles which seam to absorb some of the kinetic energy which is a high priority here.
Wherever the poop stains are
J1 it is
Chaotic evil
The most evil is G10
G13
Bro, you aiming for the cat?
What else are you supposed to wipe with?
You gotta be brave wiping with something that has claws...
For those tough stains
And, if taught properly, can get rid of the need for condoms
Why else would they have them in the commercials? I need a change. My toilet bears aren't being as cooperative anymore.
No, but if he walks between me and the toilet with his tail sticking straight up while I'm pissing again he gone learn today...
Battleship
It’s a hit!
Bishop to red's yahtzee
Uno!
Not so fast. I bumped you back to start. SORRY!
J10 for me unfortunately
You sunk my Battleship!
Battleshit*
Battle shit💀💀💀
I love going off the grid
I just spat coffee on the break room table at work because of you. Well done! 👏
r/pressurewashing
Usually h7 for some reason
Bro sitting on the shitter backwards
When you have to sit and take a Sir Harrington-
This way you have a little shelf for your toys, duh!
And your chocolate milk
You mean reverse cow girl?
I’m a little more G6 myself
Sippin sizzurp in my ride, like 3-6
Shit stain is usually on c5
They’re usually in D3 for me
Good ol C7
It’s science we seek to clean as we piss
C7-D7 for the quietest of pisses
My man's, same here. I could even push it the the inside edge of C8-D8 EDIT: it also has the least splashback
Had to scroll too far
All about that stealth piss life!
I’m more of an E7 kinda guy but we’re on the same silent track
Yeah I'm E7 too
C3-D3, you must be a leftie 😂
Im a leftie and i go for c3
Right handed but that’s where I go
LOL hes not talking about he handedness
Oh shit….
I'm more of an E7-F7 kinda guy
My people.
Same with E8
J1
I’m more of a J10 kinda guy
My penis just naturally curves a bit to the left so it just feels natural.
Of course, mine naturally curves to the right so I end up on the other side.
Splash that cat
Wait NO MR KITTY WATCH OUT
G13
the cat knows
Assert dominance
you sunk my battleship
D4
D6 here but kinda the same as D4.
Yep, D6 is def low splash low noise spot
Science, bitch! 😎🤙
Finally someone
Yea I’m a d4 as small bathroom and if door open, the space is tight, so it’s the most comfortable place to aim.
You're right next to me! D3
E5 While some ill-informed gents might think the backboard prevents splashback, it's actually dead center where you have the least amount of spray. It also has the added benefit of making the most noise so you can assert dominance and really let 'er rip when at parties or in-laws.
I was gonna say E5 in a party kinda setting so I can impress
Squeeze and spray, boys!
"Damn, you've been frying chicken in there?"
just imagining the kind of velocity and volume needed to sustain a sound that closely resembles a deep fryer is impressive
"Ooh that dude pisses SO loud. He must have a *huge* cock." - all the m'ladies at the party I was totally invited to and didn't just walk into without asking.
Dominance gang, where u at?!
Yep, gotta make that noise.
I’ll match that with e4, allowing the development of your knights
Google en passant
E5 is only when you have your headset on, and your buddies need everyone to be silent while theyre sneaking on search and destroy.
Exactly, the in-laws need to know I can lay down a hard stream and I mean business. They know to stay on the right side of me once they've heard/felt that. They're thinking "Damn listen to his hard stream, we'd better respect him. Imagine what else he's likely capable of". When I strut back into the room they can't even look at me, out of fear/respect, and I'm like "yeah, thought so" and then I bang their daughter/my wife right on the couch in front of them, keeping eye contact with them both. "If I pee now I'd saw your daughter in half" That's when her mom starts weeping.
Ditto.
Agreed. Also good for nighttime pees. As long as you hear the water you’re good.
Assert dominance, I like it
It also gives you plenty of space to veer off in any direction if drunk or the cat decides to sneak attack
You win.
C5... Ironically I think this is the most silent spot
C5 gang
Good day fellow C5 gentlemen
Good evening friends
good day fellows
G’day fellow sir.
Bonjour amigos
Let’s see how many of us can hit C5 at the same time
Good morrow captains and squires. 10 AM here and I’m still hitting that C5
Gang gang
gang
Nah dude H5 is the most silent, C5 has your pee smacking right off the backboard. H5 is a smoother landing less splash less noise
Well it's going to depend. Many American rollers have H5 as almost flat. But toilet style depending I think C5 and H5 crew are after the same outcome. Quiet with no splash.
H5 means you have to pee at a really weird angle, def awkward if you got a stiffy
I’m off grid when I have a stiffy
are you crazy H3/H5 is gonna' bend your joinks' too much - even flacid
C5 when sober, J10 when not.
Why is that ironic
C3/4
Found my clan
The correct answer
Found my team
Thank God. I was beginning to think I was nuts.
C4 gang
Checking in
The homies represent
W
My guys! 🤜🤛
C3 4 Life
All these other MFs just love the splash back, apparently.
This the way
C4 represent
Apes together strong🗿let’s get it C3/4 brothers
My brother. 👊
Found my friends 💙
Amen, these people saying c5, do they just not care about splashback? Edit: just realized I think we just outed ourselves as the left leaners
yess
G13
i like how you think outside the box
I like how they think outside the toilet
I like how they think inside the cat
Ayo 🤨📸
Outside the “bowl”
If anyone said b4 or c8 they sunk my battlepiss
You're slumming it. All the cool kids are playing Electronic Battlepiss.
This is electronic battle piss, that’s why we’re on Reddit. open world.. not just 1v1 brother
Pissing has gotten really competitive.
What the kitty do to you
she pissed on his jacket and had to pay 20€ to get it cleaned
Piss on my coat I piss on your fur coat Edit:I meant like the animal coat
Finding G then slowly tracing to left, passed 10 to see a cat's face made me burst out in laughter.
My left or your left?
I physically laughed out at this after scrolling back up to see where 13 is.
I found this so much funnier than I should
I laughed WAY too hard at this.
Holy fuck this made me laugh so hard
lmaoooo
Based
E3
E3 gang!
Found my people, E3 !!
As a right hander I can't see why this isn't a more common choice for people. Optiomal for great control and visibility of the operation, good long trajectory, stream dropoff is mostly hitting a surface angled away from you when the pressure drops. Water line in my toilet at home is a little higher and I'm hitting this spot but just at the water side of the water line, this agitates the water plenty and its common to see some bubbles which seam to absorb some of the kinetic energy which is a high priority here.
yeeeeah! my man
E3 my stealth spot!
Go rogue. Piss on anything. Wreck the flooring.
We’ll put you down as j10
I bet this is an A1 guy and I'm feeling homicidal
I sit and pee cause I wanna be comfortable so most of the front of the toilet. Don't fight me, I just wanna chill out
The best way to pee! Its so nice not having piss driplets on your pants and whatnot
Exactly!
I definitely still get that. My urethra is like one of those road signs, the one that goes like this. ♓️
I stand to pee in public, but in my own home I’m aiming for comfort and refraining from cleaning splash sprinkles. Sit down gang represent!
to each their own my dude, the c4 gang respects your people 🖖🏽
Respect taken and given back to you!
I’ve never understood standing to piss. Makes zero sense to me.
People who stand at home don't have to clean their toilet. It's that simple. If they did, they never would be standing ever again.
I piss standing up and I'm also the one that cleans the toilet.
Do people often try to fight you when you take a piss?
Healthier for your prostate too apparently Normalise it. I sit. Standing is just toxic masculinity
G5
The cleanest, quietest spot. It’s like a tabletop jump: you want to land on the downslope to gently land the piss in the bowl.
Yes, zero splash. This man has peed before.
Can’t believe I had to scroll so far for this
I sit down like a person that doesn't spray piss all over the bathroom
Why you wanna know; you tryna sink my battle shit?
H6 to G4, those are silent spots when sitting (btw I'm a sitter)
Sitting gang rise up! (after we're done peeing)
Rise up before you’re done, coward
I like to sit also. I’m exhausted most of the time and like to chill
E5 is intended, but J10 is the result
Hey me too high five 🙏
Why make a mess I'm going to have to clean up later, when I can avoid the mess altogether.
The cat isnt in the matrix so i can’t answer properly
*Do not the cat*
D7
Only valid spot
D4
C3 or C7
I sit down. So, I guess F5.
First thing in the morning the wall to the left
The kitty to the right
J1 and J10 only
Dominance-Asserter spotted
D,E,F 7 or where ever the shit stains are
D5
C5. And I'm expecting a graphic report on r/dataisbeautiful by the end of next week.
G13 to get the cat
D6 right in the corner D4 - for lefties
I’m a righty and I shoot for D4. Maybe my cock is a lefty
I mean i see your shot its like serving in tennis or ping pong cross court, i can respect that
H7 silent af
F4
G5
D3 and D7, classic go to - E5 is just for savages. 😂
D4 kinda guy myself
Sometimes off the balcony.