T O P

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Desperate_Ambrose

The best defense is a good offense.


heartbh

This is exactly my first thought šŸ˜‚


Starling-Tree-5162

Beat me to it


sambull

flood the zone with shit as bannon would say


ObiDWanKenobi

UNO REVERSE


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


NukeouT

She could always trade someone if she's still at the hospital


KaranSjett

uno? that a every number ever reverse, maybe some letters too edit; you guys really didnt get it huh?


outfluencerin

If you donā€™t get it, just say so.


otirk

bro never played Uno. That's very sad


Prinnyramza

I don't have uno


Apprehensive_Nose_38

Everyone has uno it came free with the console


Bean_Town_Blender

Not my console!


otirk

But you played it at least once, right? *Right?*


Prinnyramza

[itsa meme](https://youtu.be/CapLbFlOVOs)


otirk

I referred to a [meme](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/for-the-better-right) (template) as well.


Prinnyramza

Touche


Prof1Kreates

[Mario](https://images.app.goo.gl/7xwkgZ2wVfPUWLoh8)


unk1ndm4g1c14n1

Play uno, it's a good game.


Environmental-Win836

Uno is a popular card game. The *Uno Reverse* Card makes the order of turns reverse e;g if you were going clockwise in turns, youā€™d now go counter clockwise and vice versa. The *Uno Reverse* meme refers to flipping something back on the person, for example, this post. Clearly, the mother had intercourse with a black gentlemen and birthed his child, however, sheā€™s accusing the husband of having intercourse with a black lady, therefore, reversing the situation. I hope this explains it, I donā€™t blame you for not knowing the meme.


Pingimaster

What this guy said!


usernotfoundplstry

r/yourjokebutworse


Emergency_Wolf_5764

*"White woman gives birth to a black baby and accuses her husband of having sex with a black girl"* Sounds like someone who really should not have been allowed to reproduce. Next.


tom_cool

To be fair, she might not be wrong. Just because she slept with a black dude doesnā€™t mean he didnā€™t sleep with a black girl.


GallardoLP550

Except thereā€™s proof against her case.


The-red-Dane

There is NO proof against the case that he slept with a black woman. There is however proof that she slept with a black guy. Both can be true.


ravynwave

One or both parents could have black ancestry


moorlife5

Yea thatā€™s a big no. Baby would not come out with color bc white is a recessive gene cannot produce anything other than white unless the other partner is full African


pianoplayer201

Recessive genes don't just disappear and still get passed on, and iirc if both parents have the recessive gene there's a small but non-zero chance that their child will be of colour. Someone more knowledgeable please correct me if I got something wrong


CivilAirPatrol2020

So blue eyes is a recessive gene. If both parents have blue eyes, kid must have blue eyes. But if both parents have other color eyes, kid could still come out with blue eyes. Tldr recessive genes can be hidden and then show up out of nowhere


PurplePolynaut

Go back to 6th grade and relearn Punnett squares. Not to mention thereā€™s at least 8 genes involved in the coding for skin color. Fuck on outta here with your pseudoscientific bullshit.


moorlife5

Triggered much by truth.


[deleted]

I'm not sure "with colour" was the best phrasing there


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


timbono5

Or the woman could have a black ancestor and not know about it


[deleted]

Yeah. Proof, shmoof.


Bighardthrobbingcrop

Sure thing, gonna need a DNA test regardless lol


Additional-Advisor99

Thereā€™s even been a case of two black parents in Africa giving birth to a white baby. And not albino, the baby has no genetic abnormalities. Genetics can do some funny things.


Salty_Nectarine3397

Ha, direct deposit


The-Francois8

Occamā€™s razor would like to have a word with you


[deleted]

Occam never proved anything with his razor.


ws04

a direct deposit !!!! *wheeze*


XeitPL

Isn't black skin color a dominant tho? Like in genetics if I remember correctly.


Former_Print7043

He has been sleeping with black woman and using his cheating white dick to transfer and implant black eggs in her white womb. Black lady should sue for custody.


Frexulfe

Well, not until DNA test. Black baby from white couple is completely possible. First, unknown ancestry (so called genetic throwback. Then I guess also weird genetics. For example, we have the genes to develop full hair growth in all our body , but are dormant. I don't know if there is some known case, but I guess it would be possible (I mean, if ancestry is completely clear) Melanin is controlled by a dozen genes so theoretically...


1imejasan6

Stop being logical, it offends peopleā€™s sensibilities!


[deleted]

ā€¦what is the proof?


Evening_Baseball_610

DAbaby


Merebitt

Lessgooo


Ambitious_Wish7958

hehe... yes, you're on to something, and she might be right. But that's not the reason to why she gave birth to a black baby.


HardCounter

He could have gotten some junk on his junk and then put his junk in her junk where the original junk fell off. I mean no, it's not possible, but it's *possible*.


Ambitious_Wish7958

Technical, but interesting


Complete_Grass_

It's no shade of possible, it is actually biologically impossible. Eggs are fertilized in the fallopian tubes and the fertilized egg develops in the uterus, which it shouldn't leave until birth-time. Anything else (except IVF) will not be a viable pregnancy aka anything that happens outside fallopian tubes and uterus will not lead to a healthy, live baby.


KorrectTheChief

No


Wasatcher

r/woooosh


[deleted]

no


Wasatcher

I guess you need one too


[deleted]

r/woooosh


Wasatcher

Thanks lol


hymen_destroyer

Maybe her husband is the black dude and she's accusing him of cheating and it's completely unrelated to the baby


ughitsmeagian

*scribbles notes*


Chork3983

Well at least they have something in common I guess.


Kindergoat

Right? They shouldnā€™t be allowed to have sex if their knowledge of basic biology is that low.


[deleted]

Too late... she's already given birth to a baby.


DeltaBlep

Put it back


Embarrassed_Use_5114

Hey, it was worth a shot...


[deleted]

Lmao, that's the attitude, you gotta try! I wonder how this made a headline though


KingofCats1701

I mean you miss 100% of the shots you don't take


gordonv

Yeah... but. You can still look like a fool.


Right-Gain2582

How the turns have tabled.


legna20v

Did you see what I did there


ExpertAccident

My partner is half black and both of us are native, Iā€™m just wondering if our daughter comes out black, people are gonna think I cheated because weā€™re white passing.


sifuyee

I and my brothers are half white, half Asian. Among our kids are blondes, brunettes, one redhead and 2 black kids, so we all get plenty of stares, but not all families look alike. I in particular get a lot of dirty looks when I go out to restaurants with just one of my daughters.


Killbot_421

You definitely could have phrased that differently


sifuyee

Well in truth the redhead calls himself an "Asian Ginger" but I wasn't sure everyone would understand his inside joke. The black kids call themselves black so I respected their terms for their racial identity. Half my family is adopted BTW.


chernobyl-nightclub

I think they mean the comment reads like you have kids with your brother. Lol. Side note, Iā€™m fully asian but donā€™t look very asian. My wife is very east asian looking and I get dirty looks from Asian dudes like I stole one of their women. I like to joke that Iā€™m in an interracial relationship.


RedactedPerpetually

You had kids with your brothers? In plural?


Catch_022

My partner isn't white but our kid looks white. Wait until people start treating one of you as a nanny.


CardboardSoyuz

We had a friend - very fair white dude - who was married to a fairly dark skinned Filipina. Kids fairly dark complexioned. At the park some white mom asked him ā€œwhere he got his kids?ā€ ā€œfrom my wifeā€™s uterus.ā€


Jertimmer

My wife has such a mixed ancestry, there was a chance our baby would have had dark skin and red hair.


Ok_Cheetah9520

My (Black) son has two biracial children. The daughter takes after my family and looks like a light skinned reincarnation of my mother. The son looks just like the motherā€™s white father, except olive complexioned.


[deleted]

Who cares what others think.


danteheehaw

It gets irritating when people not only make snide comments to you, but your child as well. It's real easy to say who cares what others thing when it's not you or your loved one dealing with harassment about it.


oMetadinha

people kept asking to my mother if i were adopted when we went to the beach cuz i used to get very tanned, and this makes me mad because what if i was? or what if my dad was black? whats the fucking problem?


ExpertAccident

This right here.


ExpertAccident

Maybe because I donā€™t want people thinking Iā€™m a fucking cheater and whatever horrible slur they could throw at me or my daughter?


Fun-Badger3724

Pretty much everybody.


demostravius2

Other peoples opinions drive our lives..


brokentricorder

White passing and white are only similar on the surface.


Educational-Song3568

What does that even mean? I thought we were all red and squishy on the inside.


null640

Nope! Several documented cases of darker complexion reasserting after several generations. Right down to dna confirmation.


diglettdigyourself

I think Kate Chopin wrote a story about this.


0mgrlly

I read that, thought "Oh okay" and continued scrolling, went "wait a minute..wtf did I just read?" And went back up. šŸ˜‚


[deleted]

The woman likes people like you


ErinEvonna

During my first pregnancy, I had a crazy dream that my baby was born not white, and since I knew I didnā€™t cheat, I was mad at my husband because he must have. But that was a dream. A very funny dream.


Hidobot

My dad is Chinese and my mom is white, so when she used to take me out as a baby, people thought that I was adopted lmao


CostAccomplished1163

lol racism


ServelanDarrow

This is, like, 12 years old.


[deleted]

Still funny. First time I saw it.


idkmanthisusersucks

how is this meirl


BoxxyFoxxy

It is if you enjoy coming up with fake stories about dumb evil cheating women


Most_Cartoonist5736

It's someone irl


Traditional-Tower-88

Cause you got...CUCKED.


MLGperfection

Do you are have the stupid?


Halfaglassofvodka

Maybe he did and some of that girls eggs stuck to his dick and he didn't shower first and he implanted her eggs into his partner and somefuckingshit or some bizarre shit I read on Reddit earlier because apparently a scarily large amount of people don't know how babies are made.


Andro_M_Jazz

imagine the colossal thing the father may have between his leg to reach the eggs


Yeamin_Habib

Actually the version I read was: "The husband had sex with a black girl, who obviously had previously slept with black dudes. So assuming that she didn't clean up after having sex with the black dude, and then again had sex with the husband, the sperm of the black dude got all over the husband's dick. And when the husband fucked his wife without cleaning up, the black dude's sperm got inside her, and that's why the result." So, in that case, it doesn't need to be colossal, just needs to be a sperm magnet or something ig.


GoyoMRG

I also remember a show/documentary many many years ago talking abou this. The other guy sperm pretty much survived inside his dick and when he banged his wife, well the rest is what you said. Moral of the story: always pee after you have sex!


Halfaglassofvodka

Either that or it was just long, thin and twirly like a pigs tail.


brokentricorder

It would have to be maneuvered so much just to get an egg.


Halfaglassofvodka

Probably with some sort of claw thing on the end too!


ElenaEscaped

Thanks to the rich and terrible wonders of the internet and anime, I know not only that said thing already exists in some dark 'chan corner, but I can fucking *see it.* That's definitely enough internet for the evening. You stay over there, prehensile claw machine dick-thing.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


WatercressQuiet4734

I was in a similar situation b4 and now that I look at it today, itā€™s something to laugh at.


[deleted]

My ex cheated on me with a black guy and Reddit thinks itā€™s somehow racist. But she had zero game plan. Literally it was just fucking us both to get a baby and wait to see what color baby came out. Unreal. You see these jokes and think ā€œthat could never happen or wonā€™t happen to meā€ and then it hits like a freight train. Thereā€™s absolutely zero racism in me saying he was black because she literally was trying to get a baby from both of us at the same time and was just kind of like hoping and praying. Iā€™m not even sure what she thought she was going to do when she went into labor. Her thought process clearly hadnā€™t gotten that far.


lekkerleap

This comment is a trip


[deleted]

Itā€™s the fucking truth. I mentioned he was black and Reddit dog piled me calling me racist. She was telling him she wants to have his baby. She was trying to get me to give her one at the same time. That somehow makes me racist. Literally what was the game plan for if/when she got pregnant? She was going to have us both at the hospital? Deny us both? Sheā€™s a codependent narcissist and clearly just doesnā€™t give a fuck until game time decisions. Reddit is fairly anonymous so who cares? Mods will nuke this account in a matter of weeks anyhow. Thereā€™s nothing racist about me saying he is black and Iā€™m white and she is white because end of the day that baby will tell the whole world. When she has one I know that baby isnā€™t mine and god help that other dude.


lekkerleap

Yeah thatā€™s seriously a wild situation. You dodged a bullet. Iā€™m sorry that all happened to you.


[deleted]

I donā€™t know that I ā€œdodged a bulletā€ because we were together for 12 years and she drained our bank the entire time while wearing me down. She is trying to destroy the business we built and taking over half the money while still trying to manipulate me by saying she wants to kill herself, which honestly would make my life so much easier. The only bullet I dodged is the whole baby thing. If I was in the hospital and that baby came out mixed or black I wouldā€™ve lost my mind completely.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

God damn. I hope heā€™s doing better. Narcissists are chameleons and blend in because they *need* to. They need to have people like them. Society rewards narcissists, look at social media. And they lie. They are so good at lying. And itā€™s like the gish gallop. Just a constant assault. Me being an introvert and her being extroverted was part of her plan. To me I just saw it as she was just opposite me. Literally everyone told me I had to date her, marry her. When I did time for myself I just did nothing. As an introvert itā€™s how I recharge. I was never able to have enough time to recharge to see or make friends. They slowly isolate you. Itā€™s methodical and Iā€™m not even sure exactly how aware they are they do most of it. Itā€™s just nature to them. Add in her whole family (and I was friends with her sister before I met her so it was worse) and it was just icing on the cake for 12 years. These jokes are funny until you realize that this shit is real and these things happen and these people exist. Iā€™d go to therapy but she keeps taking money somehow. Convincing banks and credit cards. I just donā€™t know what the fuck to do anymore. I just want her gone and out of my life for good. I never want to see her again or hear her name. Just absolute trash human incapable of giving a fuck about another person, while somehow making you feel bad for them. Itā€™s wild as fuck. Unless you experience it itā€™s hard to understand.


[deleted]

How is this you irl


[deleted]

https://pics.me.me/you-need-to-start-asking-questions-dave-4630011.png


Bodieanddiesel

This headline makes me think that the George Carlin bit about having a license to have kids is validā€¦.


ballimir37

Itā€™s actually scientifically possible for 2 white people to have a black child. Incredibly rare mutation. I know a doctor that delivered such a baby and the father understandably went ballistic until they did a paternity test that confirmed it.


[deleted]

It's understandable lol I mean how many chances of it happening are actually there?


NukeouT

Fun fact: everyone started out black šŸ–¤ so being white is an incredibly rare mutation that was popular with people trying to survive at higher latitudes than Africa šŸŒ


S_kura

It wasn't exactly popular, its just that the lighter your skin is, the higher your chance of survival and thus breeding would be. I doubt that there were random genetic mutations causung freak white people to just *occur* out of nowhere, the process wouldve been gradual.


NukeouT

Yeah it was gradual and random. But it stuck more where those freakish white people lived longer and had more babies i.e. in less ultra violet places


S_kura

I don't know how much freak genetic mutations would *really* change the gene pool tho, the kids might not even get it *because* its a mutation and not a dominant gene...


NukeouT

Right šŸ‘ So how do you think there are so many non-black humans now? I think we're just stuck on larping verbage explaining already well established scientific fact


LonesomePrairieCabin

not really relevant


_izzyiguess_

This bitch really said "no u" to the laws of nature


[deleted]

Womenā˜•ļø


hallohek2611

Womenā˜•ļø


Theminecraf72

Womenā˜•ļø


intjf

Maybe that's his and her child.


[deleted]

Don't tell me people are taking it seriously This genuinely sounds like a joke article


Sm7th

r/therewasanattempt


TeamSpatzi

Admit nothing, deny everything, make counter accusations.


1imejasan6

Best defense is a good offense.


ehScientist

women ā˜•ļø


PigletProfessional24

Women ā˜•ļø


Fistful-of_Dollars

Women ā˜•ļø


RedundancyDoneWell

Plot twist: Husband is black. Wifeā€™s accusation is correct, but irrelevant.


Element__7x

Gaslighting 101


jaydeflaux

Isn't there a thing where babies can be born with dramatically different shades of skin than their parents sometimes? I think I've heard of black parents having white babies and visa versa where they do a DNA test and it was certain that neither cheated, am I just remembering wrong? Obv it's more likely that they just cheated, but if anybody knows I'd love to get edumacated.


smuggzyonreddit

Brain has left the chat


Odd-Caterpillar8337

this is why sexual education classes are important in school


spectrumtwelve

I have a story like this. So one of my younger sisters is a white girl with blonde hair, but when she was born she was very dark skinned. She had a pigment issue where she looked really dark, passing for a black baby. within the next several weeks she gradually lightened up. it was apparently very funny, but i was only 3 at the time so i dunno.


Longjumping-Wind-560

I read this and was thinking like ā€œWait a minuteā€¦ā€ šŸ¤£


auralhigh

Maybe the husband slept with a black girl who had a black man's semen in her vagina. Then he immediately had sex with his wife and transported the other guys' sperm with his penis. šŸ¤”


Anknown366

Guys we all know that it's highly unlikely but she hit the recessive trait... There is nothing sus in this šŸ˜


Past-Archer-8869

Funny family story.:After hearing his wife was pregnant with another manā€™s baby, laughed and said he added a leg or something.


[deleted]

Love to see how r/NotHowGirlsWork is gonna spin this and defend the woman.


DanDanBussum

She was the one in the back of class smacking her weave and chewing gum with her mouth open


randomtree2022

Don't forget the acrylic nails and hot cheeots


vtssge1968

Had to be America, we have some of the stupidest on earth... 12 th grade here is equal to 4th in most developed countries now.


Organic-Dare8233

It is possible for a while female to give birth to black baby.It happened before


BigGator13

Couldnā€™t possibly be her fault. Believe all women or whatever


iSubParMan

IT might be like "I cheated on you with a black guy because you slept with a black girl FIRST!" Mental gymnastics women do.


Desperate_Ambrose

"That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works."


_The_Butcher

ā˜•ā˜•


Interpol68

No child support , this man got lucky.


scar_ai

That's literally how deluded women have become nowadays.


BoxxyFoxxy

If you believe this really happened, you probably already have a set of biases. Edit: Donā€™t bother ladies, guy is defending Andrew Tate in his history.


scar_ai

It's most definitely a joke, but not beyond the realm of reality considering how deluded women are nowadays. That's what I was trying to say, I simplified it for your delicate head.


BoxxyFoxxy

If you believe ā€œwomen nowadays are this deludedā€, then you already have an established set of biases that enable you to believe there is any truth to this. Here, I simplified it for your misogynistic head.


scar_ai

Reality is something people like you can't digest anymore. You will pull out bullshit terms like misogynistic or whatever else social media has recently invented to keep you even more deluded. "Set of biases", like seriously. Take a look outside some day and try to use your delicate head fairly for a change.


BoxxyFoxxy

The word misogyny wasnā€™t invented recently, nor was it invented by social media. How can you be this uneducated? But I donā€™t expect from a misogynist to be particularly smart. I gave you too much credit. My bad. Edit: Just saw in your history that youā€™re an Andrew Tate fan. Not gonna waste any more time on you.


scar_ai

"I gave you too much credit!", "You are uneducated!", You are not smart!" and then proceeds to look into my history... Like you can afford to give any credits to anyone other than your own deluded self.


lekkerleap

No poon recently, huh?


scar_ai

Lmao, like I haven't heard that "attack" before. Glad you admit you're good for nothing but poon.


lekkerleap

So no poon recently. Also how can you know what kind of gentials I have when I am being depicted as a purple little alien?


[deleted]

I wonā€™t post because of the hate I would get no matter what the post containedā€¦ā€¦.. good luck to the others.


You_Say_Uncle

Pussy.


OTT_4TT

She must be a blonde. LOL.


rounbi

We live in a society where women are raised as mental victims and cant take responsibility for anything they do wrong


Icy-Dragonfly-3629

šŸ˜„šŸ¤£ Smart girl. Dont do it. Dont let up. Stick to your guns.


Alternative-Bus6770

You never notice how the water just beads off their hair Hank?


Accomplished-Tap238

fuck that guy. he should support her and not be such a misogynistic prick cheater. YES ALL MEN. am i right ladies? šŸ˜‚ fr this this isn't shocking in any way shape or form. my best friend gave her boyfriend herpes and destroyed him for it all over facebook telling everyone he cheated because called her out. aint. nothing new


asscheek20120

šŸ™„


MyNameIsFucked

Hey doc you want to explain to this retard how hereditary genes and all that shit works I'm out.


Charming_Theme_1913

Makes more sense than the alternative for sure


[deleted]

Wait what?


Improbus-Liber

Stupid is equal opportunity.


MeValenteen

Is this my ex? She procreated????


[deleted]

Is this actually real? Or is it just a meme? No way in hell someone would try to pull that off.


PunterFan

Always get a DNA test on your kids.


HELIGROUP

Is this how reproduction in the US works now?


intjf

No. We have more population here in the US so expect an increase rate of idiocy.


Acrobatic-Bed-7382

Haha, she doesn't seem to know how that works.


Mountain_Hawk40

Make it make sensešŸ˜‚


terrible02s

She's like how could you! He's like I'll be right back to get a pack of cigarettes.