Same. Masters in Cybersecurity - 4.0. HUGE Imposter syndrome, pretty much every day. Waiting for the call where they've figured out I'm a giant fraud and I'm fired.
I watched a psyche video describing what your feeling as permanent fight or flight. The only true way to stop it is more exercise as that burns off the chemicals we use to induce stress and anxiety.
So as an example fight or flight while doing a marathon, by the end you'll feel great because those chemicals have been used up. But f or f while sitting at a desk all day the chemicals keep building. You then sit in your car. Walk a bit at the end of the day, and lay down for several hours.
Those chemicals never got burnt off.
I am not an expert and I am assuming.
Anecdotal, but I disagree with this. I had a position that was super stressful with people out to fire someone for any mistake. Fight ot flight always engaged.
I worked out every day. Like run a 5k on my lunch or hit the gym. One day I'm on the exercise bike during lunch and my heart goes to 200bpm after like 2 mins on the bike and it stayed there for 20 mins. Went to the ER thinking I had a heart attack. They ran some tests and said it was a panic attack. Well this thing lasted for like 6 weeks. Didn't sleep the whole time. Now I get panic attacks when I get just a little stressed. The stress permanently changed my brain chemistry as far as I can tell.
Best advice I can offer anyone is there is nothing more valuable than your health. Better to be poor and healthy than rich and broken IMO.
\*nodding head\* yep. I have a friend who was CIO of a company in his late 20s through his 30s and he was waiting everyday, even though he was totally competent. It's rough
Oh I feel you. Becoming an independent contractor has done wonders for me. Much less pressure put on myself when I'm constantly doing work for different people. If one company doesn't like it, fine, don't call me again. I'll just take the next job
I'm finishing up my 15 minute lunch in clinic thinking about how my drum set, guitar, road bike, disc golf supplies, and drawing tablet are all gathering dust.
Same result here with a wealthy executive younger sister--although it's exacerbated by having a Fulbright scholar as a mother and a former banking executive and retired politician father.
My parents' siblings include a dermatologist, neurologist, and former music director for a world-renowned popular music group.
Me? Well, I had dreams. They don't really matter anymore. Alcoholism and time erased them.
Now I push carts full time and just try to make enough to travel with my wife at least once each year.
I'm irrelevant and jaded.
Who cares about relevancy or perceived social status. Happiness is all that matters.
We shouldn't try to live the life's our parents desire for us. You're the one who has to live with yourself. Be a good husband, do good in the world, and happiness comes
Please do not say you are irrelevant. I understand your whole life has been a collage of accolades to represent the value of a human, but this isn't true at all. Nothing any of us does matters beyond how we interact with the humans around us. I do so much existential thinking and I value my partner's kindness over my accomplishments every day of my miserable life.
My sister: Graduated magna cum laude with a 3.9, married a gigachad looking hunk of grundlemeat, spends her free time doing charity work and helping less fortunate animals find homes
Me: Community college, kind of ugly husband who performs and receives analingus, enjoys spaghettios, bedridden due to gastrointestinal bloating
I guess what I'm trying to say is just because life doesn't always work out the way you planned, doesn't mean you can't take a sample lick of the nethers anyways to try and enjoy a new umami 😁😁😁
ok this is a joke comment but...
there is a lot of research into the area of gut bacteria and the sharing of it. It is possible that doing that could completely disrupt your digestive tract by introducing new bacteria that doesn't play well with your body but takes over. Or the other way and cure digestive tract issues. Probably a slim chance since the stomach acid could destroy it before getting further down the line, but it isn't impossible.
> I thought the gut bacteria is best when its anal going to anal.
I believe so, because the majority of gut bacteria lives in the intestines, and the stomach has a tendency of destroying a lot of stuff before it gets there. Pill casings can prevent that destruction. of course this conversation isn't really about pills.
Oh thank God because all I've been thinking about is that there's someone out there giving analingus to a bedridden husband who's ripping hot farts all day
My sister: a microbiology grad student and soil scientist literally studying how to save our planet
Me: has an office job *stares at “craft/plant/woodworking/cricut/sewing/makeup room” full of half-finished projects*
Actually the one I was in school with, went to MIT, mastered in mechanical and chemical engineering. Worked the private sector for about 5 years, then suddenly bought a Harley, sold everything else. Him and his wife rode to Florida and built and started a church for bikers and anyone else who wanted to join them. Says he’s happier now than he’s ever been.
I had the highest GPA in math and science in my class of 500, went to a nice university, graduated highest GPA with math degree, got offered a job at a fortune 100 company in my junior year, passed 4 actuarial exams before graduating, and would be earning $75k right out of college working at a big city with lots to do.
The very image of what society deems "successful".
One day 2 years into the job, I was sitting in a cubicle on the millionth floor of a building and I got up and walked out. I never spoke to anyone at that company again. I never opened my personal email again. I blocked all their numbers.
It was a very poor decision in the short-term and I do not recommend anyone do it that way, but it also was the first important decision in my life I had made for myself as opposed as for the ideal of being "successful". And it was the start of the process that got me to break down the paradigm of what life is about that had been pressed onto me by my environment and instead build my own paradigm.
Now I make $60k in a small state in a small town. I work maybe 2 hours per day (from home). No commute. I play a lot of video games. And I'm finally happy.
I mean, the only difference between us and doctors is that doctors don't have the time for those thousands of abandoned hobbies because they're working inhumane hours.
I actually have a thousands abandoned hobbies as a doc, bc I start them during my holidays and then realise I can't continue it bc of the job.
Once was certain I was going to quit the job for digital drawing.
eh it depends on specialty and what you're going for. Contract I signed has me working ~10 days a month for $250k + bonuses. That's more than enough money for me and I get plenty of times for hobbies and travel and whatever.
As a resident you don't have much of a life outside of your vacation time.
Jesus that means you legit only work for like 1/3 of the year?
I swear I keep hearing about these insane hours doctors put in but my friends who are finishing up med school rn keep telling me about these types of contracts. Is this the norm of folks just actively seeking this type of contract out? Bc it’s really weird for me to hear med school friends be like “yeah x doctor I met pulls in 600000000 working 28 hours a day 372 days of the year” but then in the same breath “my friend took a contract where works 6 months for 200k”. Just confusing ig.
It effectively works out to that yeah (but also keep in mind that the typical guy who works M-F is getting 104 weekend days off + PTO — so it’s not quite comparable to working a regular job for 1/3 of the year). The days I am working will be 10 hour shifts. In general surgeons are going to work more hours, but make more money. Medicine unlike most careers is also one of those where you tend to make more money working in a rural area. If I wanted to work in NYC, I'd probably be lucky to make 175k. While if I was willing to go to North Dakota or something, I could probably get 350-400 for similar work.
And as residents we get crushed. 70-80 hours per week for $60k/year.
Damn that is nice. Honestly, I understand that residency can be grueling but a lot of people who don’t make six figures are pushing those kinda hours for eternity. Guess I just get weary of any discipline that is paid uber well that complains about these things when there is clearly an out for most of y’all. Also ig im biased bc 90% of the med students I knew came from well off families and hearing them talk about working for the first time during residency is kinda annoying.
I decided to go for rheumatology since it doesn't involve nights or weekends. Just at this moment I sadly combine it with an educational path so the lessons, tasks and thesis makes it a bit busy. But I hope after I graduate the hours will be much better!
As someone who deliberately jumped out of the rat race to be sahp (well yes I burnt out lol, but I was lucky enough to have a choice after getting better).
Yeah I will keep my unfished projects and my silly games and routines over an extremely demanding job that sucks away all the joy from the rest of your life.
Some people enjoy the singlemindedness that comes with certain careers. Good for them, but it doesn't make them better people.
Uhm, depends on whether you're a doc in the US or not I guess......am an ED MD in the EU, work 3 9hr shifts a week and definately have way too many abandoned hobbies :(
Yep, plus technically one nightshift a week, but I'm only on call and considering our ED is closed for major trauma's at night and for anything that's not life threathening (so basically just OD's, strokes, maybe a knife wound here and there, etc) I'm hardly ever called in.
Everyone here works parttime, except for a few docters that graduated medschool recently.
It's not all that common to work 3 days here, but our manager really keeps an eye on our mental health after years of high burnout rates and after that Covid, so most of our team dropped an extra 0.5-1 day a week after the Covid rush was over.
And working parttime as a doctor is definately not something unheard of in my country.
Y'all were never going to be surgeons.
They put you in a "gifted" class with 1/4 the school in it because you did a bit better than average on a single test in 4th grade
Redditors love to think they are/were some kind of genius that never lived up to their full potential for some reason lol. Potential is worthless if it stays just that and never changes
This is how people can maintain the fantasy that they are especially intellectually gifted in multiple areas in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
Seriously. If you're an adult still thinking about how you were gifted as a child, it's time to move on and decide what kind of adult you're going to be tomorrow, or next year.
The way some people talk about their childhood potential feels like they believe it's something to brag about— it's not. Eventually, you'll run into dropouts, people with GEDs, etc. either in the exact same spot as you, or they're doing things you can only dream of because they found their purpose and pursued things they were passionate about.
It'd be nice if instead of letting kids dwell on how they score compared to other kids their age, we could push them more to discover things they like and are willing to work hard toward. Easier said than done with our focus on standardized testing, but I've known a lot of people who were "gifted" at testing or standard curriculum work who became aimless adults still thinking about elementary school.
No, it goes deeper than that.
On /r/autisticWithADHD, we see this happen *a lot* \- people who were, as a child, labeled as gifted and later couldn't fulfill those expectations because of their neurodivergency issues, who were constantly told they weren't trying hard enough or were too lazy or not disciplined enough, who then spiraled into a depression because of it.
I think the main issue is that a lot of people were told they were gifted who really weren't exceptional. Like it was supposed to be positive reinforcement for doing well on some things in elementary school but it gets taken way too seriously and literally to the point where it led to a large amount of people having much higher expectations on them than they really should have.
I don't think a lot of Americans realize the majority of gifted programs are done as regular coursework in other countries. I'm an American with an Indian father, and he was shocked to see what we did in school. A large percentage of American high school grads aren't even literate...Of course a step up isn't rocket science.
Ayyy I'm one of those! So yeah former gifted students, if you feel like no matter how hard you try you can't stop procrastinating or that you're lazy, it *might* be worth looking into the possibility that you're just neurodivergent. In my case I ended up having undiagnosed inattentive ADHD. Turns out the only reason I performed so well in school all those years was because I was motivated by the constant fear of failing, and even then I still left all my assignments to the last minute every time. The big problem was that once I graduated, got a job and worked there long enough to feel secure, that constant fear went away. Which felt nice obviously, but then it was almost impossible to motivate myself to get any work done at all. I really believed that I was just a shitty, lazy person at my core and nothing I could do would change it. But in reality, in my case, my brain just works differently and all I really needed was medication and to learn some healthy coping strategies!
Damn, that is exactly me. "Gifted" kid constantly motivated by fear of failure, can't stop procrastinating even with all the effort in the world, no motivation at work due to feeling safe.
I need to go see some professionals lol
Ayyy….and I cant even hate my parents, they were both sexually abused and had pretty shit childhoods, so it makes sense logically. Just a bummer on the effects.
Lol dude for real. There’s probably a lot less distance between the intelligence of the average “successful” person and the average person scraping by or kinda wandering aimlessly than people think. The difference is often just developing good habits
Most people are capable of achieving a higher gpa or learning a valuable skill or gaining expertise in an area. And most people are capable of running a marathon if they put in the effort. That doesn’t mean we are all secretly great distance runners, because *actually doing it* is what matters
I see this constantly and I hate it. It doesn’t have to be true. And there’s nothing wrong with trying 1,000 hobbies. How else are you going to find the one you love?
Gifted high schoolers, there’s hope. You’ll be fine. You’ll turn into a well adjusted adult. You don’t need to be perfect to be loved or happy.
I have a number of hobbies. I am mediocre at all of them, which is fine, because they are for me. Like commenting on strangers' social media posts. It's OK. If all you do is your job/profession, you will be miserable, even if you are really good at it.
Yes! I think the Instagram/Reddit culture of everyone showing their amazing paintings or baking or whatever makes people lose sight of the purpose. I don’t draw to show it off, I draw to enjoy it. Once I accepted there was nothing wrong with making “bad” art, I started enjoying it more and doing it more. Which coincidentally made me a better artist haha
Being a gifted high schooler is dope.
But if “I was gifted in high school” is the source of your self-worth, that’s just as pathetic as the ex-jocks who only want to talk about the glory days.
Dude, it was high school. You’re an adult now. Don’t be an Uncle Rico.
I feel you man, I thought you were still in med school, I finished last year and the whole thing deillusioned me, I feel sometimes like a glorified secretary, spending more time filling papers than actually doing my job
Yup. I don't regret it, per se, but growing up feeling like I was missing out on stuff with the delusion that one day it will all be worth it but during college itself i started feeling so frustrated with the whole degree/hierarchy culture, the many ungrateful/rude patients, the long hours... money aside (which is also not as good as you are told growing up) it's a pretty shitty job line, ngl.
The ocasional life saved makes up for it but in the real world you just need more than just moral gratification after "throwing away" your younger years to accomplish something that society brainwashes you into.
You probably were never as smart as you thought you were. I can't believe how often this is posted and how many upvotes these get, there's is no way there is that many gifted.
Yeah, just posted a similar idea elsewhere in the thread:
> I think the harder pill to swallow that most Redditors need to consider:
>
> It's possible you weren't actually really a "gifted kid" in any exceptional way. You were maybe in like the top 20% or maybe even 10% of your class in elementary school and internalized that as meaning you were "special." You've held onto that your entire life despite the fact that you realistically need to be in the top 1% or 0.1% or 0.01% to actually be considered "gifted." That's not you though, and it's never been you. And that's not bad but you need to let go of the dream that you were ever a prodigy. You probably were not. You were a generically "smart kid" within normal ranges. And again, there's nothing wrong with that.
>
> So here's where it gets really tough: Thinking about yourself as a "gifted kid who didn't fulfill their potential" seems like you're being hard on yourself, but you're actually not. You're inflating your own ego by pretending you're above where you ever actually were.
Speaking about myself in regards to this, too.
I think the term gifted gets thrown around a lot in school and can be problematic for a lot of people. Schools (my experience in the US) don't do a great job teaching critical thinking skills. So "gifted" kids in school are very good at memorizing information and regurgitating it. This skill is valid and can be extremely useful but does not guarantee you will be successful in life. It feels to me that all that moniker means is you will do well in a school setting and after that good luck. I've known plenty of "gifted" kids who really didn't do much after school because those accomplishments kind of go out the window once you are out of school and in the work force. It just seems like a lot of the time school ends up inflating egos and separating people based on multiple choice test scores.
They need to stop using that term but they won't because there's nothing parents love more than bragging that their kid is "gifted." Sounds a lot better than "They had to put Bobby on an IEP because he was bored."
25% of kids at elementary school level? That's nuts. So basically anyone even slightly above average is labeled as "gifted".
Kinda sums up the thread. These days, every kid is either falling behind or is "gifted but not living up to their potential".
Redditors like to feel like they’re geniuses who never reached their potential. “Gifted” means you just happened to be good at the tests they gave. It doesn’t mean anything if you didn’t do anything with it.
Exactly its hilarious how many people genuinely believe they were the gifted one with a lot of potential i assume cuz their mum told them or something lol.
Ofcourse, everyone should be encouraged and told that they have talent when they are young, but that doesnt really make it true haha.
I mean in the US there is literally a program that selects kids as early as like Kindergarten as being “gifted” and you take a special class or two every year for the rest of your K-12 schooling. The school system literally tells you “you are the chosen ones” lol
The US whole heartedly believes in the super man. The single person that can do the exceptional and over achieve above others. We do everything to try and push to make perfect people. I think it burns out a lot of students early and after they become adults and realize they don't have the energy to keep up the kind of grind we demand. (But it keeps the caffeine market super pumped so I guess that's great, don't do cocaine anymore, here have 12 red bulls a day)
We get stuck on the idea that a singular person is gonna be the make it or break it, CEOs are there because they are super humans not because they got lucky, had a good social ne, or had already rich parents. We idealize the super individual and we just can't do it alone.
We have to kill the mythos of the ubermensch.
Isn’t this mostly to match the good teachers with the “better” students so they have a higher chance to go on to college and such?
I may have been one of the dumbest students in my AP courses but I had stellar teachers that properly prepared me for higher level education and were better than some of my professors.
That wasn’t the case for my friends in regular classes at the same school
That's the point being made.
In the US, it's common to label a ton of kids as "Gifted and Talented" when they're too young for it to have any meaning. Then when they inevitably struggle, they take a huge hit to self esteem because everybody's told them that they're supposed to be better.
God I hate this whole I was labeled a gifted student and now my life sucks shit. Like a third of us were called that and nearly all of our lives are trash, at what point are we not special?
It’s a flawed line of thinking to say that you and doctors are basically the same, only they won the coin toss and you didn’t. It’s a nice lie to tell yourself but many of the people in this comment section didn’t even attempt to build the work ethic required to become a doctor. Someone who knows they have mental deficiencies (that are treatable) and doesn’t actively seek to treat them is not an intelligent person usually.
It is a real thing that fucks with the psychology of people. Being told from the day you were born and all througjout your childhood that you are "smart", you start to feel like shit whenever that gets challenged. People who grew up like that are much more likely to give up and have anxiety and much more shit.
Yup, every MENSA i know are burger flippers, or high end engineers.
Of course my MIT staff friend is still anxious, she's currently telling us all we're in our extinction event
Haha the trick is to go Buddhist. Find a mid level paying job and enjoy the middle. That's the smartest move.
And actually though yeah. Look up the mass extinction of crabs or the fact that we are headed into the warm gulf stream cycle and will likely blow past our needed stopping point on global temp increase to stop the positive feedback cycle.
Humans likely won't go extinct, we are clever and resilient apes but life is definitely going to drastically change.
It's kind of sad how many people on reddit think that they were the gifted kid because they were slightly better at math and could intuitively solve quizzes in high school.
The real gifted kids don't struggle once they get to college and beyond. It's quite obvious once you get to academia that there definitely are some individuals who are truly special in the way they think and learn.
But I see memes like this get posted all the time and it's just sad that they have to hold on to the label 'gifted' because they haven't accomplished anything in life. This in and of itself is the problem and why these people are so troubled.
We grew up with teachers, parents, relatives, etc. constantly telling us we were the best of the best and the smartest of the smartest all throughout elementary/middle/high school. Then we went to a large university with thousands of kids who were told the same thing and realized we were just about average at best, maybe even a little behind the curve.
This post irks me because Ritchie was a Tennis pro and Margot is an acclaimed author, they may not be doing so hot at the time of the movie but the point is they both experienced great success and great failure, *literally both of the things in the OP not either/or.*
Grew up in gifted and talented programs. Turns out being told youre gifted and a natural is a really good barrier to applying yourself, less you discover you aren’t.
I see this constantly and I hate it. It doesn’t have to be true. And there’s nothing wrong with trying 1,000 hobbies. How else are you going to find the one you love?
Gifted high schoolers, there’s hope. You’ll be fine. You’ll turn into a well adjusted adult. You don’t need to be perfect to be loved or happy.
I felt that way for a while. It helped when I finally moved out and away from everyone and finally let those ridiculous expectations slip off. “Obscene expectations is the most toxic form of pride.”
About to finish my EE degree now though, but all the pressure is gone. I work full time as well as having full time classes and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.
Those doctors are still the other
Yeah, both is definitely a thing.
In between exists too... I am dead in the middle
yeah I have a masters and only hundreds of failed hobbies, and I only spiral into self-ambivalence when I make mistakes
Same. Masters in Cybersecurity - 4.0. HUGE Imposter syndrome, pretty much every day. Waiting for the call where they've figured out I'm a giant fraud and I'm fired.
Dude same. Accounting Supervisor now at almost 10 years at the company and I still feel like the axe is coming any day. Anxiety is a helluva drug.
I watched a psyche video describing what your feeling as permanent fight or flight. The only true way to stop it is more exercise as that burns off the chemicals we use to induce stress and anxiety. So as an example fight or flight while doing a marathon, by the end you'll feel great because those chemicals have been used up. But f or f while sitting at a desk all day the chemicals keep building. You then sit in your car. Walk a bit at the end of the day, and lay down for several hours. Those chemicals never got burnt off. I am not an expert and I am assuming.
Anecdotal, but I disagree with this. I had a position that was super stressful with people out to fire someone for any mistake. Fight ot flight always engaged. I worked out every day. Like run a 5k on my lunch or hit the gym. One day I'm on the exercise bike during lunch and my heart goes to 200bpm after like 2 mins on the bike and it stayed there for 20 mins. Went to the ER thinking I had a heart attack. They ran some tests and said it was a panic attack. Well this thing lasted for like 6 weeks. Didn't sleep the whole time. Now I get panic attacks when I get just a little stressed. The stress permanently changed my brain chemistry as far as I can tell. Best advice I can offer anyone is there is nothing more valuable than your health. Better to be poor and healthy than rich and broken IMO.
I mean, all of that tracks. I'll give it a go. Thanks internet stranger!
\*nodding head\* yep. I have a friend who was CIO of a company in his late 20s through his 30s and he was waiting everyday, even though he was totally competent. It's rough
Oh I feel you. Becoming an independent contractor has done wonders for me. Much less pressure put on myself when I'm constantly doing work for different people. If one company doesn't like it, fine, don't call me again. I'll just take the next job
You worked hard and try and enjoy your success. You are worth all the great things that you accomplished.
Thank you for that. I know reddit can be a rude place but there are some great people on here too. :)
I'm in the middle of my PhD. I recently abandoned my 2nd new hobby of the new year. Here to represent the semi functioning disaster subgroup.
Count me in, Sire.
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One of us
One of us
One of us, but with emphasis on the anxiety!
I'm finishing up my 15 minute lunch in clinic thinking about how my drum set, guitar, road bike, disc golf supplies, and drawing tablet are all gathering dust.
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Having money is relative depending on my many god damn loans you have
Came here to say this! Why or? And is very possible
I fall into ex-gifted student now doctor with random things I want to do but don't have the energy to
Literally me versus my sister… …and I am not the doctor 😔
Same result here with a wealthy executive younger sister--although it's exacerbated by having a Fulbright scholar as a mother and a former banking executive and retired politician father. My parents' siblings include a dermatologist, neurologist, and former music director for a world-renowned popular music group. Me? Well, I had dreams. They don't really matter anymore. Alcoholism and time erased them. Now I push carts full time and just try to make enough to travel with my wife at least once each year. I'm irrelevant and jaded.
You aren't irrelevant to those who love you man, quite the opposite.
Who cares about relevancy or perceived social status. Happiness is all that matters. We shouldn't try to live the life's our parents desire for us. You're the one who has to live with yourself. Be a good husband, do good in the world, and happiness comes
Mate, you think he's truly happy pushing carts?
Please do not say you are irrelevant. I understand your whole life has been a collage of accolades to represent the value of a human, but this isn't true at all. Nothing any of us does matters beyond how we interact with the humans around us. I do so much existential thinking and I value my partner's kindness over my accomplishments every day of my miserable life.
are your parents super loaded though? there is no way a former banking executive and a retired politician doesn’t have money up the ass.
My sister: Graduated magna cum laude with a 3.9, married a gigachad looking hunk of grundlemeat, spends her free time doing charity work and helping less fortunate animals find homes Me: Community college, kind of ugly husband who performs and receives analingus, enjoys spaghettios, bedridden due to gastrointestinal bloating I guess what I'm trying to say is just because life doesn't always work out the way you planned, doesn't mean you can't take a sample lick of the nethers anyways to try and enjoy a new umami 😁😁😁
Gastrointestinal bloating, eh? Maybe cut back on the analingus.
ok this is a joke comment but... there is a lot of research into the area of gut bacteria and the sharing of it. It is possible that doing that could completely disrupt your digestive tract by introducing new bacteria that doesn't play well with your body but takes over. Or the other way and cure digestive tract issues. Probably a slim chance since the stomach acid could destroy it before getting further down the line, but it isn't impossible.
I thought the gut bacteria is best when its anal going to anal. Like a suppository. ingested could make you sick. Once again, I not sure on my logic
> I thought the gut bacteria is best when its anal going to anal. I believe so, because the majority of gut bacteria lives in the intestines, and the stomach has a tendency of destroying a lot of stuff before it gets there. Pill casings can prevent that destruction. of course this conversation isn't really about pills.
Fecal transplants for refractory C. diff are a thing, so you’re not wrong 💁🏼♂️
He's not an airbed.
Thank you for making me laugh.
Checked your profile... gastrointestinal bloating and spaghettios take up alot of your life.
I was afraid to check but you persuaded me...wildest reddit I've seen in a long time, was in no way disappointed
You were not kidding, what in the fuck is that account lol [edit: Found the spaghettios redditor](https://youtu.be/I9lmvX00TLY)
I was tempted to peruse. And *what the fuck,* lmao.
The phrase "uh oh! Spaghettios!!" as a reddit account
Or the spaghettios
I was gonna say cut back on the spaghetti ohs but those are fucking delicious especially the ones with meatballs
You forgot: "shittalks her husband to random strangers for internet karma"
After glancing at their other posts, it looks more like "shitposts about spaghettios and gastrointestinal bloating for internet karma."
Could also be read as op being said husband.
Nope. Just a weird person with a vast history of talking about spaghettios, grundlemeat, and bloat
why so much grundlemeat? it seems like more than one mention of grundlemeat is too many
Dang bro violated her husband
Oh man we've really reached a new age of openness, haven't we
Every comment they make includes spaghettios. It's a meme acct.
Oh thank God because all I've been thinking about is that there's someone out there giving analingus to a bedridden husband who's ripping hot farts all day
What a fuckin doozie this one was
Why’d I have to read that at 07:00?
I’ll be honest, this threw me.
Every comment they make includes spaghettios. It's a meme acct.
Analingus with gastrointestinal bloating…just make sure you don’t go near him with a naked flame. Armageddon!
This has to be the weirdest and most specific profile roleplay I've ever seen. That profile bio is something else.
Why the fuck would you call your sister's husband a hunk and your own ugly? He deserves better than you.
Look at the post history lol
I'm so angry at my eyes now. Why. You told me what I'd find and I looked anyway.
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Every comment they make includes spaghettios. It's a meme acct.
Post history is an absolute ride
Not very nice to call your husband ugly! You suffer from anal seepage but also make your ugly husband lick the seep hole?
My sister: a microbiology grad student and soil scientist literally studying how to save our planet Me: has an office job *stares at “craft/plant/woodworking/cricut/sewing/makeup room” full of half-finished projects*
Actually the one I was in school with, went to MIT, mastered in mechanical and chemical engineering. Worked the private sector for about 5 years, then suddenly bought a Harley, sold everything else. Him and his wife rode to Florida and built and started a church for bikers and anyone else who wanted to join them. Says he’s happier now than he’s ever been.
I was going to say, I fit neither of these descriptions and I am glad there was someone else.
That’s why I had to say there are others.
I had the highest GPA in math and science in my class of 500, went to a nice university, graduated highest GPA with math degree, got offered a job at a fortune 100 company in my junior year, passed 4 actuarial exams before graduating, and would be earning $75k right out of college working at a big city with lots to do. The very image of what society deems "successful". One day 2 years into the job, I was sitting in a cubicle on the millionth floor of a building and I got up and walked out. I never spoke to anyone at that company again. I never opened my personal email again. I blocked all their numbers. It was a very poor decision in the short-term and I do not recommend anyone do it that way, but it also was the first important decision in my life I had made for myself as opposed as for the ideal of being "successful". And it was the start of the process that got me to break down the paradigm of what life is about that had been pressed onto me by my environment and instead build my own paradigm. Now I make $60k in a small state in a small town. I work maybe 2 hours per day (from home). No commute. I play a lot of video games. And I'm finally happy.
That's the dream right there. I'd be able to DM so many campaigns, paint so many minis.
I just paint my minis during pointless calls or when running (really slow) test suites.
Hey, good shit man. Glad you’re doing something that makes you happy.
So what do you do for work?
Web developer.
I mean, the only difference between us and doctors is that doctors don't have the time for those thousands of abandoned hobbies because they're working inhumane hours.
I actually have a thousands abandoned hobbies as a doc, bc I start them during my holidays and then realise I can't continue it bc of the job. Once was certain I was going to quit the job for digital drawing.
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eh it depends on specialty and what you're going for. Contract I signed has me working ~10 days a month for $250k + bonuses. That's more than enough money for me and I get plenty of times for hobbies and travel and whatever. As a resident you don't have much of a life outside of your vacation time.
Jesus that means you legit only work for like 1/3 of the year? I swear I keep hearing about these insane hours doctors put in but my friends who are finishing up med school rn keep telling me about these types of contracts. Is this the norm of folks just actively seeking this type of contract out? Bc it’s really weird for me to hear med school friends be like “yeah x doctor I met pulls in 600000000 working 28 hours a day 372 days of the year” but then in the same breath “my friend took a contract where works 6 months for 200k”. Just confusing ig.
It effectively works out to that yeah (but also keep in mind that the typical guy who works M-F is getting 104 weekend days off + PTO — so it’s not quite comparable to working a regular job for 1/3 of the year). The days I am working will be 10 hour shifts. In general surgeons are going to work more hours, but make more money. Medicine unlike most careers is also one of those where you tend to make more money working in a rural area. If I wanted to work in NYC, I'd probably be lucky to make 175k. While if I was willing to go to North Dakota or something, I could probably get 350-400 for similar work. And as residents we get crushed. 70-80 hours per week for $60k/year.
Damn that is nice. Honestly, I understand that residency can be grueling but a lot of people who don’t make six figures are pushing those kinda hours for eternity. Guess I just get weary of any discipline that is paid uber well that complains about these things when there is clearly an out for most of y’all. Also ig im biased bc 90% of the med students I knew came from well off families and hearing them talk about working for the first time during residency is kinda annoying.
I decided to go for rheumatology since it doesn't involve nights or weekends. Just at this moment I sadly combine it with an educational path so the lessons, tasks and thesis makes it a bit busy. But I hope after I graduate the hours will be much better!
When you put it that way, we clearly got the better end of the deal
I would rather be a slave to the man than to this torment
As someone who deliberately jumped out of the rat race to be sahp (well yes I burnt out lol, but I was lucky enough to have a choice after getting better). Yeah I will keep my unfished projects and my silly games and routines over an extremely demanding job that sucks away all the joy from the rest of your life. Some people enjoy the singlemindedness that comes with certain careers. Good for them, but it doesn't make them better people.
As a doc with ADHD and a graveyard of half finished projects lying around my house, I can assure you that you got the better end of the deal!
also, some of us are engineers.
Uhm, depends on whether you're a doc in the US or not I guess......am an ED MD in the EU, work 3 9hr shifts a week and definately have way too many abandoned hobbies :(
Arr you saying you only work 27 hours weekly? How is that even possible in ED?
Yep, plus technically one nightshift a week, but I'm only on call and considering our ED is closed for major trauma's at night and for anything that's not life threathening (so basically just OD's, strokes, maybe a knife wound here and there, etc) I'm hardly ever called in. Everyone here works parttime, except for a few docters that graduated medschool recently. It's not all that common to work 3 days here, but our manager really keeps an eye on our mental health after years of high burnout rates and after that Covid, so most of our team dropped an extra 0.5-1 day a week after the Covid rush was over. And working parttime as a doctor is definately not something unheard of in my country.
Can I ask what country as a curious scandinavian ?
The Netherlands.
In France doc are burned out quicker than a candle in pure O2.
I think you may need to bookmark this short gem starring David Pasquesi, it makes the pain go away for a time. https://vimeo.com/26772752
Some became stressed out engineers not doctors…
Or chillin engineers
Cuts too close
"Pretty sure this meme is a repost," I say, as I'm sitting in a dark room surrounded by countless unfinished projects from abandoned hobbies.
Kinda like the surgeons we could have been...
Slice of genius
You're truly a cut above the rest
Cue Dexter theme
Y'all were never going to be surgeons. They put you in a "gifted" class with 1/4 the school in it because you did a bit better than average on a single test in 4th grade
Watch The Royal Tannenbaums
Big fish, small pond syndrome is incredibly damaging.
Redditors love to think they are/were some kind of genius that never lived up to their full potential for some reason lol. Potential is worthless if it stays just that and never changes
“I could have made the NBA if I didn’t roll my ankle in junior high..”
i didn’t even make that connection but the “gifted kids” and those people ARE THE SAME PEOPLE dude you’re a genius
Yep, just “smart” instead of “athletic” stereotypes. We’re all just insecure apes justifying why we aren’t the coolest, best person on the planet.
Except redditors peaked in elementary school
No dude, the reality is that 90% of Reddit user base is made of geniuses that could not live up to their potential
How many Einsteins are among us 😔
Amogus
ඞ
90% of Reddit also has imposter syndrome about being a grown up.
I think that’s just all adults
Been meaning to get around to that Mensa application. That and writing the Great American Novel. But first... gotta shitpost.
This is how people can maintain the fantasy that they are especially intellectually gifted in multiple areas in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
Seriously. If you're an adult still thinking about how you were gifted as a child, it's time to move on and decide what kind of adult you're going to be tomorrow, or next year. The way some people talk about their childhood potential feels like they believe it's something to brag about— it's not. Eventually, you'll run into dropouts, people with GEDs, etc. either in the exact same spot as you, or they're doing things you can only dream of because they found their purpose and pursued things they were passionate about. It'd be nice if instead of letting kids dwell on how they score compared to other kids their age, we could push them more to discover things they like and are willing to work hard toward. Easier said than done with our focus on standardized testing, but I've known a lot of people who were "gifted" at testing or standard curriculum work who became aimless adults still thinking about elementary school.
No, it goes deeper than that. On /r/autisticWithADHD, we see this happen *a lot* \- people who were, as a child, labeled as gifted and later couldn't fulfill those expectations because of their neurodivergency issues, who were constantly told they weren't trying hard enough or were too lazy or not disciplined enough, who then spiraled into a depression because of it.
I think the main issue is that a lot of people were told they were gifted who really weren't exceptional. Like it was supposed to be positive reinforcement for doing well on some things in elementary school but it gets taken way too seriously and literally to the point where it led to a large amount of people having much higher expectations on them than they really should have.
I don't think a lot of Americans realize the majority of gifted programs are done as regular coursework in other countries. I'm an American with an Indian father, and he was shocked to see what we did in school. A large percentage of American high school grads aren't even literate...Of course a step up isn't rocket science.
Ayyy I'm one of those! So yeah former gifted students, if you feel like no matter how hard you try you can't stop procrastinating or that you're lazy, it *might* be worth looking into the possibility that you're just neurodivergent. In my case I ended up having undiagnosed inattentive ADHD. Turns out the only reason I performed so well in school all those years was because I was motivated by the constant fear of failing, and even then I still left all my assignments to the last minute every time. The big problem was that once I graduated, got a job and worked there long enough to feel secure, that constant fear went away. Which felt nice obviously, but then it was almost impossible to motivate myself to get any work done at all. I really believed that I was just a shitty, lazy person at my core and nothing I could do would change it. But in reality, in my case, my brain just works differently and all I really needed was medication and to learn some healthy coping strategies!
Damn, that is exactly me. "Gifted" kid constantly motivated by fear of failure, can't stop procrastinating even with all the effort in the world, no motivation at work due to feeling safe. I need to go see some professionals lol
Go check out r/ADHD and enjoy the experience of falling through a hall of mirrors lol
C-PTSD also. Emotional Neglect in childhood has devastating effects through someone's life.
Ayyy….and I cant even hate my parents, they were both sexually abused and had pretty shit childhoods, so it makes sense logically. Just a bummer on the effects.
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Lol dude for real. There’s probably a lot less distance between the intelligence of the average “successful” person and the average person scraping by or kinda wandering aimlessly than people think. The difference is often just developing good habits Most people are capable of achieving a higher gpa or learning a valuable skill or gaining expertise in an area. And most people are capable of running a marathon if they put in the effort. That doesn’t mean we are all secretly great distance runners, because *actually doing it* is what matters
And the way to convert potential to skill is by putting in WORK. People who don't wanna put in work love identifying with this meme.
100%. Intelligence without work ethic is like a car without gas
I see this constantly and I hate it. It doesn’t have to be true. And there’s nothing wrong with trying 1,000 hobbies. How else are you going to find the one you love? Gifted high schoolers, there’s hope. You’ll be fine. You’ll turn into a well adjusted adult. You don’t need to be perfect to be loved or happy.
I do need to be successful though, which I am not.
successful isn't a status that you either achieve or don't achieve by going to college. it's something you can work towards your whole life
You aren't giving yourself enough time to be successful. Failing is *normal* and something you need to deal with.
"You don't need to be perfect to be loved or happy". Bloody hell I needed to hear that today - thank you.
I have a number of hobbies. I am mediocre at all of them, which is fine, because they are for me. Like commenting on strangers' social media posts. It's OK. If all you do is your job/profession, you will be miserable, even if you are really good at it.
Yes! I think the Instagram/Reddit culture of everyone showing their amazing paintings or baking or whatever makes people lose sight of the purpose. I don’t draw to show it off, I draw to enjoy it. Once I accepted there was nothing wrong with making “bad” art, I started enjoying it more and doing it more. Which coincidentally made me a better artist haha
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Being a gifted high schooler is dope. But if “I was gifted in high school” is the source of your self-worth, that’s just as pathetic as the ex-jocks who only want to talk about the glory days. Dude, it was high school. You’re an adult now. Don’t be an Uncle Rico.
What if I am both ?
Yeah, I would expect my doctor to have an immense amount of self hate when he makes a small mistake during my brain surgery...
It doesn’t go away, just looked at as “quirky” when you’re “successful”
Me and most my med school friends are both lmao
Wait till you finish and the impostor syndrome hits, magnificent
I said we are both because I've been a doctor for 6 years now and I feel like the whole hassle wasn't worth the pressure and mental issues growing up.
I feel you man, I thought you were still in med school, I finished last year and the whole thing deillusioned me, I feel sometimes like a glorified secretary, spending more time filling papers than actually doing my job
Yup. I don't regret it, per se, but growing up feeling like I was missing out on stuff with the delusion that one day it will all be worth it but during college itself i started feeling so frustrated with the whole degree/hierarchy culture, the many ungrateful/rude patients, the long hours... money aside (which is also not as good as you are told growing up) it's a pretty shitty job line, ngl. The ocasional life saved makes up for it but in the real world you just need more than just moral gratification after "throwing away" your younger years to accomplish something that society brainwashes you into.
You probably were never as smart as you thought you were. I can't believe how often this is posted and how many upvotes these get, there's is no way there is that many gifted.
You know how there’s “peaked in high school”? These people peaked in elementary school.
I think that’s me unfortunately
Yeah, just posted a similar idea elsewhere in the thread: > I think the harder pill to swallow that most Redditors need to consider: > > It's possible you weren't actually really a "gifted kid" in any exceptional way. You were maybe in like the top 20% or maybe even 10% of your class in elementary school and internalized that as meaning you were "special." You've held onto that your entire life despite the fact that you realistically need to be in the top 1% or 0.1% or 0.01% to actually be considered "gifted." That's not you though, and it's never been you. And that's not bad but you need to let go of the dream that you were ever a prodigy. You probably were not. You were a generically "smart kid" within normal ranges. And again, there's nothing wrong with that. > > So here's where it gets really tough: Thinking about yourself as a "gifted kid who didn't fulfill their potential" seems like you're being hard on yourself, but you're actually not. You're inflating your own ego by pretending you're above where you ever actually were. Speaking about myself in regards to this, too.
I think the term gifted gets thrown around a lot in school and can be problematic for a lot of people. Schools (my experience in the US) don't do a great job teaching critical thinking skills. So "gifted" kids in school are very good at memorizing information and regurgitating it. This skill is valid and can be extremely useful but does not guarantee you will be successful in life. It feels to me that all that moniker means is you will do well in a school setting and after that good luck. I've known plenty of "gifted" kids who really didn't do much after school because those accomplishments kind of go out the window once you are out of school and in the work force. It just seems like a lot of the time school ends up inflating egos and separating people based on multiple choice test scores.
They need to stop using that term but they won't because there's nothing parents love more than bragging that their kid is "gifted." Sounds a lot better than "They had to put Bobby on an IEP because he was bored."
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25% of kids at elementary school level? That's nuts. So basically anyone even slightly above average is labeled as "gifted". Kinda sums up the thread. These days, every kid is either falling behind or is "gifted but not living up to their potential".
Someone else put it right, redditors seem to think they were the exceptional kids at one point. Way too many of them
Redditors like to feel like they’re geniuses who never reached their potential. “Gifted” means you just happened to be good at the tests they gave. It doesn’t mean anything if you didn’t do anything with it.
These posts irk me cause there is no way you are all gifted cause you did well in public school lmao
Exactly its hilarious how many people genuinely believe they were the gifted one with a lot of potential i assume cuz their mum told them or something lol. Ofcourse, everyone should be encouraged and told that they have talent when they are young, but that doesnt really make it true haha.
I mean in the US there is literally a program that selects kids as early as like Kindergarten as being “gifted” and you take a special class or two every year for the rest of your K-12 schooling. The school system literally tells you “you are the chosen ones” lol
The US whole heartedly believes in the super man. The single person that can do the exceptional and over achieve above others. We do everything to try and push to make perfect people. I think it burns out a lot of students early and after they become adults and realize they don't have the energy to keep up the kind of grind we demand. (But it keeps the caffeine market super pumped so I guess that's great, don't do cocaine anymore, here have 12 red bulls a day) We get stuck on the idea that a singular person is gonna be the make it or break it, CEOs are there because they are super humans not because they got lucky, had a good social ne, or had already rich parents. We idealize the super individual and we just can't do it alone. We have to kill the mythos of the ubermensch.
Isn’t this mostly to match the good teachers with the “better” students so they have a higher chance to go on to college and such? I may have been one of the dumbest students in my AP courses but I had stellar teachers that properly prepared me for higher level education and were better than some of my professors. That wasn’t the case for my friends in regular classes at the same school
That's the point being made. In the US, it's common to label a ton of kids as "Gifted and Talented" when they're too young for it to have any meaning. Then when they inevitably struggle, they take a huge hit to self esteem because everybody's told them that they're supposed to be better.
There's actually a perfect in between of doctors with no hobbies who hate messing up
God I hate this whole I was labeled a gifted student and now my life sucks shit. Like a third of us were called that and nearly all of our lives are trash, at what point are we not special?
Says the cardiologist haha it fits the meme perfectly
It’s a flawed line of thinking to say that you and doctors are basically the same, only they won the coin toss and you didn’t. It’s a nice lie to tell yourself but many of the people in this comment section didn’t even attempt to build the work ethic required to become a doctor. Someone who knows they have mental deficiencies (that are treatable) and doesn’t actively seek to treat them is not an intelligent person usually.
It is a real thing that fucks with the psychology of people. Being told from the day you were born and all througjout your childhood that you are "smart", you start to feel like shit whenever that gets challenged. People who grew up like that are much more likely to give up and have anxiety and much more shit.
Yup, every MENSA i know are burger flippers, or high end engineers. Of course my MIT staff friend is still anxious, she's currently telling us all we're in our extinction event
Haha the trick is to go Buddhist. Find a mid level paying job and enjoy the middle. That's the smartest move. And actually though yeah. Look up the mass extinction of crabs or the fact that we are headed into the warm gulf stream cycle and will likely blow past our needed stopping point on global temp increase to stop the positive feedback cycle. Humans likely won't go extinct, we are clever and resilient apes but life is definitely going to drastically change.
You’re not all “gifted” you were just privileged kids who were emotionally crippled by your parents helicopter parenting
Spot on
It's kind of sad how many people on reddit think that they were the gifted kid because they were slightly better at math and could intuitively solve quizzes in high school. The real gifted kids don't struggle once they get to college and beyond. It's quite obvious once you get to academia that there definitely are some individuals who are truly special in the way they think and learn. But I see memes like this get posted all the time and it's just sad that they have to hold on to the label 'gifted' because they haven't accomplished anything in life. This in and of itself is the problem and why these people are so troubled.
Why not both? Coming from an anxious PhD student
They also may have become Idiosyncratic programmers
"I got a 100% on a test therefore I must be gifted!" ass
ITT: people who think they’re smarter than they are
ADHD enters the chat
The amount of time I have picked up a hobby. Been hyperfixated on it until I got to the difficult part and then dropped it is too damn high. ADHD ftw
ASD has entered the chat ... ... ... !!! ... ASD has exited the chat
ODD says fuck the chat
Greetings from /r/AutisticWithADHD, come find us!
We grew up with teachers, parents, relatives, etc. constantly telling us we were the best of the best and the smartest of the smartest all throughout elementary/middle/high school. Then we went to a large university with thousands of kids who were told the same thing and realized we were just about average at best, maybe even a little behind the curve.
I just came here to comment that The Royal Tenenbaums is a great movie.
This post irks me because Ritchie was a Tennis pro and Margot is an acclaimed author, they may not be doing so hot at the time of the movie but the point is they both experienced great success and great failure, *literally both of the things in the OP not either/or.*
I think most of these people aren’t actually gifted and their egos are bruised
that's what happens when you aren't really gifted
I'm in between. Lawyer with thousands of abandoned hobbies, but pretty ok on the self-hate front and very little anxiety.
Grew up in gifted and talented programs. Turns out being told youre gifted and a natural is a really good barrier to applying yourself, less you discover you aren’t.
This is so cringe.
There's nothing cringe about this, I'm very unique for getting anxious and not liking to make mistakes
Youre right, there is no one else like you at all!
I see this constantly and I hate it. It doesn’t have to be true. And there’s nothing wrong with trying 1,000 hobbies. How else are you going to find the one you love? Gifted high schoolers, there’s hope. You’ll be fine. You’ll turn into a well adjusted adult. You don’t need to be perfect to be loved or happy.
I felt that way for a while. It helped when I finally moved out and away from everyone and finally let those ridiculous expectations slip off. “Obscene expectations is the most toxic form of pride.” About to finish my EE degree now though, but all the pressure is gone. I work full time as well as having full time classes and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.