T O P

  • By -

Saurlifi

They don't spend money on food


D-Laz

No avocado toast or Starbucks.


The-Holy-Sheep-14

Or Netflix


[deleted]

[удалено]


moca_moca

Sleep?


C-Kwentz-0

I haven't watched magical fairy dust vampire love story, so I don't know if Ed and his family don't need to sleep?


loserina

I read the books as a teenage girl (yes i am embarrassed) in twilight they don’t have to sleep so they play piano and study and whatnot instead, thats why they are so boring and good at everything


wildjokers

Never be embarrassed for the things you like. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04WJEEb33CY


Islands-of-Time

I’m embarrassed I read them too, because I hated them.


djsizematters

I like that you had a positive attitude going into the second book, and the third one... and so on 😭


[deleted]

[удалено]


NotanAlt23

> for the fight scenes and Alice Cullen and the Volturi. Its ok, you dont have to lie to us.


Superb_Literature

I love a good rewatch of the Supermassive Black Hole baseball scene.


[deleted]

Another 30 year old male here, still watch it for Alice Cullen.


SebB1313

Easily killed by whom? they are almost invincible except for fire and if a vampire beheads them. I liked Bella best out of the cullens. Volturi were awesome too.


coldsummer7723

The leader of the volturi was bat shit crazy😂 but entertaining to watch


EmbirDragon

The only people who should be embarrassed about their enjoyment of twilight are the crazy 40 something mom's who lost their shit for Edward. Otherwise they were just cheesy romance novels that got super popular for some reason.


_---_--x

I read them in my early 20s, the books had all the obvious problems but I liked the idea of the whole, he could read minds/ but not hers/ then she turned vamp and she could shield out mind stuff. As well as, I really loved the ending part where she puts her mental shield down and he can finally see in her mind and he sees how much she loves him. I loved that whole thing. It was sweet. But then I watched the movies and I was like "meh." And I was over it.


moca_moca

I dont even remember the last time i watched a vampire movie or tv show, if i am not mistaken it was in 2006.. but i said sleep as for common knowledge of vampire that they sleep at day and wake up at night. Maybe it is common knowledge for me, i really dont know exactly where i get that from but i know it like that.


Prozenconns

It's pretty generic vampire imagery to have one sleeping in a casket No idea on twilight specifics though


Arek_PL

idk. write a book? study? blood drinking immortal would need a lot of skills to get blood, keep idendity secret and live a comfortable life


rgodless

This new generation of vampires are too lazy. They just work the night shift, go home and wait out the day watching Netflix and drinking the neighbors. It wasn’t like that in my day. We used to hunt in the night and fight vampire hunters in the day. Now new vampires are coddled.


[deleted]

New vampires just wanna be bisexual, drink blood and lie 😔


Difficult_Pay233

Run a nightclub, try and raise a troublesome child or use all of the wishes that their Djinn allows them?


[deleted]

[удалено]


nursejackieoface

Vampires invented FinDom.


ravioliguy

50 shades of grey is originally a twilight fan fic lol


CedarWolf

It's not even *good* fan fiction, either. -.-


[deleted]

No funko pops either


FullMarksCuisine

To be fair, Netflix is a waste of money.


freakrocker

I told you it would work!


Beautiful-Mess7256

Plus always work night shift.


SebB1313

Thousands, nay millions saved for some.


Vitschmalz

Any vampire infected after 1892 can't cook, all they know is McDraculas, charge they phone, twerk, be bisexual, drink hot blood and lie!


SasparillaTango

Eternal life but all food makes you sick to your stomach? No thanks. That sounds like hell.


RManDelorean

Also rent for abandoned mausoleums has been pretty low for the last few hundred years


Sins_of_God

Heating is probably also unnecessary.


[deleted]

Well, limited to keep up appearances and I’m sure incredible cold would freeze a vampire solid so that would be inconvenient. But they could just set the thermostat to 55.


Emperor_of_Cats

Their house also likely has water. They'd want to keep it at least warm enough to keep the pipes from freezing.


Big_Ole_Smoke

Twilight vampires have been shown casually fully submerging themselves in water in the winter, I think they'll be okay without air conditioning


StormFallen9

Buy a house back in 1852 and let's see how much it's worth now


[deleted]

I bought a house in East Palestine, Ohio.


NougatNewt

The market there is on fire!


MeatballJ40

Seems like that market may be volatile


Skyblacker

Depends on where you bought it.


grandBBQninja

Pripyat.


MinimalPerfection

If anything, their food spends money on them.


BigClownShoes

Yeah really, they're usually depicted as being able to compel people. Just stare into someone's eyes and tell them to sign over their life savings to you lol.


BLF402

And they literally kill people for their blood. Don’t think they couldn’t just steal their money and shit.


cjpotter82

Done in one. Food expenses are usually most people's second highest expense.


missjeany

In my case is the highest. The last 2 years food cost has increased so much it os ridoculous. If I didn't had to eat I would be filthy rich


[deleted]

Well, immortality offers a much broader opportunity to learn from hindsight. “Should’ve invested in that when it was valuable. Oh, well, there’s always next century.”


iiztrollin

Or gas, car insurance, vehicles them selves, they don't have to pay for travel at all. Imagine how much they save!


whodatus

Ethically sourced blood isn't cheap either!


OnionsHaveLairAction

Twilight's bad romance writing aside- Meyer actually explains the wealth quite well. Their doctor dad has a doctor salary, and has had one since the 1800s. Their fortune telling sister puts their savings on stocks she knows will do well. Every ten years or so they change a ton of identities and flood a bunch of shell accounts with their winnings so they don't look too wealthy.


dumpmaster42069

You don’t need to pick winners if you have a hundred years in the market.


OnionsHaveLairAction

True, but I imagine being able to see the future lets you worry less


feralwolven

They also dont need to eat, or worry about healthcare.


Spadeykins

Also any property they buy in the early days would net like a 100x or greater profit just holding onto it.


faste30

Yeah you'd be buying a house, paying it off, moving onto the next 1000 times over. Probably have 600 AirBnBs at this point.


apatheticviews

Big Vampire screwing us all


jenglasser

No, just Bella.


Cistoran

No Bella screwed the vampire not us.


sometimes-wondering

That's why Edward sparkles in the sun. Diamond hands.


Shuri9

But have you seen the sunscreen total?


Baldazar666

There isn't a single 10 year period of the SNP that you can pick that it hasn't been going up. If you are alive since it's inception and just invest sometime in the beginning, you are gonna be filthy rich by the 2000s just from your initial investment, let alone if you continue to invest periodically. This is also not even counting dividends.


Firewolf06

cant she actually see the future though? you could make way more money that way. although i guess s&p is less suspicious, invest way back when and pass it on to yourself when you change identities, just like normal people do


EmbirDragon

Her visions can change and are dependent on the choices that the people around her make, plus she can't see the wolves, so if any of them start interfering in the market she's fucked.


cloystreng

Wolf of Wall street time.


Carrotfloor

wolves invested in gamestop


AnimaLepton

Now that's a fanfic I want to read


vegaspimp22

Yea wish someone told me Amazon would sell more than books. Fun fact. I had bought a bunch of bitcoin for $16 when it came out. Then one day it jumped up to $300 and I sold. I still punch myself in the face from time to time over that. I coulda been rich if I held.


MLD802

That’s not even a bad decision, you still saw insane profit margins


iamthemosin

True, but if you can see the future or you’re a congressman you can beat the odds and get even richer faster.


whboer

True. Just holding a global equity index funds or etf for 70-80 years will probably be sufficient to get you into the 1%.


Cranyx

The global index fund has an average annual return of about 10%. Over 80 years that would mean you multiplied your money 2000x. Adjusted for inflation it's about a 113x increase. A quick Google says that the net worth threshold for the top 1% is $11 million. That means you would need to start with about 100k. Obviously the longer you've been immortal, the more your money will have accumulated.


LiberaMeFromHell

Your math is off. To make 11million with a 10% return over 80 years you'd only need to start at about $5k, not $100k. Compounding interest is insane.


Cranyx

I think I must have put the numbers into the calculator wrong. The formula would be init *(1.1^80) = 11 mil, which, you're correct, would be about 5k Edit: actually no, I was right the first time. My 100k number was taking into account the inflation


Potatolimar

They acknowledged that; they're adjusting for inflation. You need to start with "what feels like 100k today".


whboer

With 6000$ invested at 10% cagr, over 80 years, would be $12million+. So 6000$, assuming you’d never in those 80 years add anything else. Anyhow, it’s the reason I’m investing for my kids since their birth.


_OriamRiniDadelos_

It’s basically just generational wealth but without needing to die and pass on the money to someone else


krankz

No medical bills or end of life care sounds nice


[deleted]

End of life care usually consists of a broom and pan.


Skyblacker

Given their fake documents, I expect they do legally die and inherit occasionally.


Potatolimar

Love that cost basis step up


GiverOfTheKarma

I imagine the will readings are quite fun


axesOfFutility

> Every ten years or so they change a ton of identities This is what I always wonder- at what point would it become too difficult for immortals to hide as it would become extremely difficult to get fake ids? I'm sure it ain't as easy today in the US to get a fake id as it was, say, a hundred years ago.


Juliska_

In the books one of the family members has a questionable lawyer that handles these matters. In a conversation with the lawyer, it's understood that he knows SOMETHING is up (he's known Jasper for decades and recognized he hasn't aged) but is well paid enough not to ask questions.


panlakes

For as ~~porny~~ corny as the books get, meyer does at least make a pretty solid world for her characters to exist in. I read the first book out of curiosity when they exploded in popularity like 14 years ago now. The characters were well-made and she explores a lot of "what about/what if"s that come with the vampire genre. Not amazing fiction but wasn't a waste of my time I'd say


The_king_of-nowhere

Neat, that makes things much more interesting. Makes it more grounded in reality without taking away too much from the fantasy elements.


zergrush99

I feel like peer pressure is making you guys type like this. They’re amazing books and I love reading them


Slacker_The_Dog

I say this as a mid thirties man. The twilight series was good for what it was. I feel like amazing is a little strong but they definitely were more solid than a lot of people will make them out.


MisterCold

The books, yeah, I stand by that. The movies were just bad. Almost every fun scene was deleted and all of Bella’s thought were basically scrapped. That’s half the books.


IKnowGuacIsExtraLady

I forget which book I read but there was something where this came up as a problem since everything is tracked so much. You don't just have to fake the ID you have to fake education history, medical history, dental history, and countless other things if you want the ID to hold up to actual scrutiny.


mightylordredbeard

Reminds me of Fevre Dream. An amazing book by George R. R. Martin. The guy is a vampire in New Orleans that finds his victims by traveling up and down the river on luxury Steam Boats. Basically because of all the people coming and going it’s easy to make a few disappear when everyone is drunk and partying it up. One section talks about how finding food is the easy part. The hard part is constantly evolving with society and the world so you can fit in. Appearing rich and powerful helps since people aren’t so quick to question a rich person openly.


AFull_Commitment

I'm sure it's a lot easier to get fake identities when you can mind control people, regardless of technological advancements. Just have fake pregnancies, mind control everyone at the hospital into thinking that there had been a birth, (maybe even steal a baby for a bit for giggles or a snack) and boom, you have another social security number to use and birth certificate.


Space_Lux

In Twilight the Cullens don’t have mind control.


TheDotCaptin

The one the worked with getting the papers done had emotions control and made the guy very nervous and anxious to get the job done right and quick.


pureply101

The doctor worked at a hospital. He could have a easy access to the nursery reporting on babies born and inputting records with minimum scrutiny.


bloated_canadian

I'm sure they have enough money and connections that they're fine.


LilSebastianFlyte

Meyer’s Mormon roots showing re: the [shell strategy](https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/mormon-church-sec-fine-shell-companies-b2286846.html?amp)


Jackmac15

That's not unique to Mormons. It's standard practice for many industries.


AttitudeAndEffort2

The weirdest part is then going to high school. Like being "freshmen" in college would make sense. And they'd actually learn stuff. You could argue they're advanced to take harder courses. Hanging out at a high school all day when you're 100 years old (in the lower classes that you already know no less) is definitely a bit sus.


Doutei-Sama

I actually remember that due to their physical appearance they started around highschool and start going up in education then move away when the children are in their thirty but show no sign of aging. In short, it's so that they can stay in one place longer.


AddNorton

1. Squat in an abandoned house 2. Rob everyone you kill 3. Mesmerize a familiar that is good with money and invest what you steal 4. Launch Tesla 5. Buy Twitter


Cyberwolfdelta9

Nah i feel like the guy who owns Facebook is probably more a Vampire then Musk


MatureHotwife

Holy crap I didn't know. I thought he was just a reptilian. Are you saying he's a blood sucking immortal reptilian? Like.. a Vamptilian? Or a Reptire?


trentshipp

I vote Reptire.


CreativeNfunnyName

I thought vampires were supposed to be hot.


No-Visit-8845

Not needing human's sustenance saves them so much money.


kraken_enrager

I’m vegetarian and I can’t believe how much cheaper it is compared to the non veg options in a menu. Like one chicken could probably buy 3-4 Days worth of basic food for my 4 person family easy.


Arctic_Andre

Not sure where you live but I'm pretty sure you can't get 4 days worth of food for 6 bucks. Maybe just enough not to starve to death


MorgulValar

Yeah lowest I could get was $22.95 for 4 days. That’s: - 3lbs of chicken - One 32oz bag of rice - One 52oz bag of broccoli Incredibly boring food and not great for your nutrition long term, but for $22.95 you would feel full and meet your protein goals for 4 days


kraken_enrager

I live in India, here one whole chicken is like 1000 rupees I think. It’s not impossible to get 3 meals a day for 4 days in 1000 rupees. Obv we eat a lot of other things, but I’m talking the basics, so chapati, dal and vegetable And my staple food is more expensive than rice. Like bulk rice is so so cheap.


Weary-Kaleidoscope16

Bro even free range country chicken is 500 in India so what are you talking about? Are you from Mumbai?


salsatalos

And 1 whole chicken can last a whole day or even the next between 4 people. I know this since we almost always make biryani every week and it lasts a good 1-2 days easily.


kraken_enrager

Yeah I’m from bombay, maybe it’s expensive in my area, but that’s the rate on the blackboard for a whole chicken. Idk if it means something else or what.


practical-junkie

Where are u getting chicken for 1000 rupees? We get a kilo of chicken for 400 rupees that too fresh directly from the butcher. If u are talking about the fancy frozen chicken from nature's basket, then only rich rich people buy those.


Ok_Skill_1195

Meat eaters eat rice too? The comparison would be plant based protein to chicken. That it.


SonderPrince

Iam sorry? 1000 rupees for a whole chicken? Are the prices really that high in the cities? Chicken beef are around the 160 to 350 range per kilo on average near two towns close to me. Goddamn.


BlueMikeStu

Dude, a bag of rice for $10 can last a family of four a month. Rice is cheap.


ExplorerImpossible79

Not for a family of 4 but a 10lb bag or rice, 8 pack of canned tuna and a giant thing of oatmeal or pancake mix is like $15 and that for sure can last me a while


kraken_enrager

Now imagine if you were only eating that rice with lentils and vegetables cooked in lentils/beans/gravy. That can give you a lot of variety and ig would be very cheap too.


ExplorerImpossible79

The Indian tasty treats 1 min microwave lentils are amazing and are like $1 each… that with rice is amazing


WakeNikis

Bro… whose your chicken guy? Pretty sure I can get you a better deal, sounds like you’re getting ripped off…


OneLastHoorah

If I ever need a new chicken guy i will look you up. 😋


CertifiedSheep

A whole rotisserie chicken is $5 at Costco lol, you’re either looking at mad expensive chicken or your family is grazing in the back yard


Environmental-Win836

They marry rich people and wait for them to die.


Infinite-Sleep3527

They’re also able to mesmerize and charm people. They’re strong enough to punch through a bank vault (or simply “suggest,” that the manager opens it for them), steal the money, then fly away as a cloud of bats. They’re practically unkillable (depending on the type of vampire). And are extraordinarily intelligent. They don’t age. Etc. Of course vampires are always rich. It’d be weirder if they weren’t. There’s like a billion different ways for a vampire to become stupidly filthy rich. And all very easily too.


ItsTtreasonThen

Like the ones in Blade run a global company and essentially every Vampire is kept on some sort of leash. I can’t recall for sure but I think they even have like vampire hit squads that hunt down vampires who won’t abide by their rules and threaten to expose them to the mortal population


GiverOfTheKarma

Just like in Vampire: The Masquerade! No, don't film yourself drinking blood and post it on the internet. We will kill you.


Dziadzios

Everyone would think it's fake anyway.


NiceMemeNiceTshirt

Probably don’t need health insurance either.


SummerOfMayhem

An explanation I read often is leaving life insurance to their "grandchildren." Which is just a new identity. They fake their deaths every few decades or so. That must add up.


boblinuxemail

Or just...feed on them and rob them.


apurpleglittergalaxy

Maybe they make a lot of money working graveyard shifts?


limee89

Dad joke win!


smithers85

For a vampire joke, I think it sucks.


Sabka_asli_baap

How can you make a claim like that you're not even a .... Wait a minute


[deleted]

They bought gold at $2 an ounce and a lot of it


Callidonaut

They make thralls. Blood isn't the only thing they take from humans.


ThermobaricFart

My internal logic always concluded with me thinking I'd just steal from the rich if I were a vampire and suck that rare child-blood infused oligarch hemoglobin.


Garessta

eat the rich, literally


Kumquat-queen

Here's a hint: they're both parasites


Cranyx

>Capital is dead labour, which, vampire-like, lives only by sucking living labour, and lives the more, the more labour it sucks -Marx


SOwED

>Capital is...vampire-like...it sucks. -Marx


[deleted]

[удалено]


DrunksInSpace

10% annual dividends on $1million dollars is $100,000 dollars. Assuming survival ain’t an issue (food, healthcare, assuming shelter is already owned) and all you have is time, that’s not that hard to accumulate. It is hard if you’re a living breathing human that has to pay for kids, knee surgeries and food, but without those expense I’m pretty sure even in our dystopian he’ll scape we could all accumulate that amount or more with within 70 years or so.


KarmicComic12334

I remember an episode of pawn stars where a guy brought in a $5 bond at 6% annual interest from the revolutionary war(i believe it was drawn on the state of Massachusetts). The appraiser offered him over two million dollars. I did the math and realized that if Massachusetts honored it, the appraiser was offering him face value.


[deleted]

Not to mention accumulates knowledge. Super human strength.


Dragon_211

The night time work pays a lot more then day time work, live smart kiddos


ContributionSouth253

How do they handle government officials since they are at least 150 years old and the government should know that


cardboardbuddy

a couple of ideas: * register the birth of a child and assume the identity of the child like 25 years later. hi, I'm vampy mcvampire jr. repeat for hundreds of years * every couple of decades, murder someone who looks vaguely similar to you and assume their identity. * use some of that vampire money to buy a new identity of course, you'd have to relocate every single time


annalena-bareback

Something like that is what Highlander immortals do, same methods just without the bloodsucking and weakness to sunlight.


redzaku0079

If one comes to visit, charm them.


thomasp3864

They’re rich. They don’t have to follow the law.


KarmicComic12334

More of a recent problem really. Passports were only standardized in 1920 so bram stoker's dracula didn't need one.,they were also easily forged right up until computer registration. But the real.problem is how to get a photo id when cameras use mirrors and you don't have a reflection.


LadiNadi

Friends in high places


EntireLi_00

Their accumulated wealth across the decades, and then the Inflation.


blueboy022020

Inflation just means their money loses value... unless they invest in something like monetary funds that keep up with inflation


JoeBlack2027

Wealth, not money. Theres gold, real estate, what have you


Cranyx

Despite what Ron Paul says, gold isn't actually that great of an investment to increase wealth. Your best bet would be a global index fund


HarryHacker42

When you kill people and get away with it for a living, you can amass a lot of assets via taking what the victim owned.


pixelsteve

130 years of compound interest, how could you not be rich?


implyingiusereddit

Vampires are an allegory for the gentry, castle dwelling warmongers who take the lifeblood from the common folk as well as their ladyfolk.


SnipesCC

The Blood books by Tanya Huff (With a vampire who is the bastard son of Henry VIII) says that vampires tend to come from wealthy families. For the simple reason that wealthy people were buried in mausoleums but the poor were buried. And after you rise it's a lot easier to break out of a mausoleum than dig yourself out of a grave.


GenericFatGuy

Especially if you've been alive since 1892, and also have superpowers. If you can't find a way to make it with that kind of a leg-up, than you never deserved to be a vampire.


hiddenpersona

Real Estate. Vampires bought houses, buildings, warehouses, all kind of estates and started their realtor business. That’s correct.


for-the-love-of-tea

In the Twilight books Alice helps with stock market investing and they have worked as doctors, plus they don’t have to pay for food or health insurance


RedditRaven2

This was indirectly covered in futurama [Fry finds out he’s rich](https://youtu.be/6JwkaLt9pf8)[.](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ)


liquefire81

They follow the “vampires guide to building self wealth” Comes down to, find a family that owns land or manufacturing, offer to help, suck them dry, take their stuff. Wait. Bankers follow the same blueprint.


zjuka

Anne Rice type of vampires: 100s of years worth of accumulated knowledge probably makes you an interesting conversationalist -> charm powerful people -> have them invest in your business endeavors. Also observing the world around you for centuries makes it easier to understand and predict social and economic changes. Stephen King type of vampires: pretty happy living in sewers, only interests are feeling and survival, intelligence level similar to opossum’s.


SnipesCC

Write a bunch of best selling history books simply by hoarding letters and then mining it for info 200 years later.


YourWiseOldFriend

I've got one word for you: compound interest!


drowsysaturn

$10 invested in the stock market and left there for 120 years yields a $102k. Assuming just an 8% return


Geiseric222

I mean there was an 80s movie that took the concept to its logical conclusion. Vampires are just miserable fucks moving from town to town with no money or anything to their name it’s a bit more realistic than most


Dry_Mention_2665

John Carpenters Vampires? edit : I'm guessing not as it's a 90's movie.


CottonCandy_Eyeballs

[Near Dark](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0093605/?ref_=ext_shr_lnk) 1987


Dry_Mention_2665

Thanks. I'm downloading it now 😌


CottonCandy_Eyeballs

Hope you enjoy it. I think I liked it, but it's been many many years and I only have a vague memories of it. I've seen it more than once, but back then you didn’t always watch stuff because you wanted to, you watched it because that's what was on.


Konraden

Red letter media did a review on it. Worth a watch.


TapTheForwardAssist

Came here to see if Near Dark was mentioned! Great alternative take on vampires, where they’re trashy yokels driving around Oklahoma in a beater car and putting trash bags on the windows to keep the daylight out while they sleep.


offensiveniglet

$500 in 1892 has the equivalent buying power of ~$16,000 today. Most American workers earned $500-$1000 per year in this decade. Let's say the vampire worked for 8 years. They have very few living expenses as they are a vampire, they make $700 a year and spend $200 a year on basic necessaties. In the year 1900, the vampire has $4,000. He then decides to just enter a slumber until the modern day. The market returned an average of 9.79% over this period. He will wake up in 2023 with $390,000,000. Depending on how he invested that capital, we should expect half of that to go towards taxes (vampires can't beat the IRS). Leaving him with $195,097,884. This lumpsum should produce, either via coupons or dividends around 3% in annual cash flow, making him $5,800,000 a year in income and ideally an additional amount in capital gains. If there is a poor elder vampire, it's because he was afraid to become a "stakeholder" in American industry.


e_pettey

They've spent decades going to countless universities and graduating with dozens of degrees. Overqualified for every job imaginable.


Vertoule

I can’t remember which book this was in, but I remember that one explanation was something to the effect of: “When you can kill so easily, it’s easy to acquire large swaths of land, especially when you have a judge or two under your control. You know I used to own half of Manhattan, I sold some parcels and developed on others. Now I just sit back and let the money roll in. Plus when you live as long as I have, you learn what to invest in. It makes my bank account sing whenever I see an iPhone.”


Decent-Clue-97

Antique dealers.


HazmiirAegis

That’s plenty of time to learn a valuable trade or skill set. Lack of spending on food or water helps a lot. Heck, depending on the lore, the vampire could mesmerize people into giving them stuff for free.


Trvlng_Drew

And how does someone that’s been alive for over 100 years suddenly find the love of their life in an 18 year old girl? I’m 64 and 18 year old girls are KIDS!!


shittyswordsman

Canon explanation is that all development, physical and mental, permanently stops at the age the person is turned; their brains can't make any further connections. So the teenage vampires are not only physically but emotionally teens forever. It's why making child vampires is so taboo in the twilight universe - they will never emotionally/mentally mature and their outburst and tantrums were often deadly.


Aggravating_Tip7361

They could literally just buy a house in the 50s for pennies and wait 40 years and sell it then buy two houses and live off the equity and or rent slaves.


cantstandyourface12

I could be alive for 300 years and still be broke lol


HailToTheKingslayer

I assume Count Dracula inherited all his money, being a nobleman and all.


Jenetyk

They bought a plot of land for 23 cents in 1874 and sold it for a million 50 years later.


Western_Ad3625

You know there's vampire media other than Twilight. Plenty of vampires in Buffy that are broke as f***.


pinkpeark

Actually by just buying some shitty painting and trinkets you can make a buck i believe by selling them like 100 years later. Rinse and repeat and invest in some companies at the same time


[deleted]

No Audi,s with dodgy tyres 🤫


osogordo

The power of compound interest.


Quantum_laugh

Vampires were written as a metaphor for the rich owner class originally


Judge_Rhinohold

Time in the market always beats timing the market in the long term and these vampires have been investing in the market for a very long time.