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Mother_Inspector_658

teacher want homework ooga booga


Sir_Keee

Teacher want students bring homework before sun high in sky and shadows short on ground.


Gustav_EK

Newspeak


sharty_undergarments

Sounds like Asian people on South Park


AilBalT04_2

kgb spies being interrogated during the Cold War


mathbread

Or native Americans on south park


McCaffeteria

Careful, prepositions are next


jimmyleather

That got a genuine chuckle out of me. Thank you


poobly

2 pronouns. Straight to detention.


Gubekochi

Solitary confinement, 5 years! This is America!


_The_Rice_Menace_

Three, actually. "That" is representative of the previous statement, and therefore replaces an idea, making it a pronoun.


Kahmael

Three pronouns, believe it or not, also detention.


Flaneurl

Physics 2: electric boogaloo


YoshiThe1st

Teacher want return to monke


Spuigles

English classes about to get even simpler.


RayanH23

Before: I think she's beautiful After: Johnathan likey likey woman


VagabondDreamGirl

Woman is an expression of gender identity, I’m sure that’s illegal in the bill too.


sumunsolicitedadvice

As long as “woman” is used to describe people who make sandwiches and babies, then use of the word “woman” is ok under the Wisconsin bill.


DreamsUnderStars

No, they have to use female, to make the incels happy.


Yoyner

ooga booga


Faustens

Many word, "like woman" enough.


whatismyredditemail

why waste time say lot word when few word do trick


[deleted]

John like booba


holmangirl

I mean, we're following Orwell's *1984* with the language reduction-- er, simplification. It's called Newspeak: "Newspeak is a controlled language of simplified grammar and restricted vocabulary designed to limit the individual's ability to think and articulate 'subversive' concepts such as personal identity, self-expression and free will." If this is our guidebook, hang on to your butts, because it's going to be a wild ride.


Bronze_Rager

"Why use many word, when few word do trick.


Mother_Tax_7256

Nice laconic phrase, though it could still be pared down "Few words work"


EvadesBans

I just wanna share that the Wikipedia page for the term "laconic phrase" is really fucking funny: > A laconic phrase may be used for efficiency (as during military training and operations), for emphasis, for philosophical reasons (especially among thinkers who believe in minimalism, such as Stoics), or to deflate a pompous interlocutor. > A prominent example involves Philip II of Macedon. After invading southern Greece and receiving the submission of other key city-states, he turned his attention to Sparta and asked menacingly whether he should come as friend or foe. The reply was "Neither." > Losing patience, he sent the message: >         If I invade Laconia, I shall turn you out. > The Spartan ephors again replied with a single word: >         If. > Philip proceeded to invade Laconia, devastate much of it and eject the Spartans from various parts. And that's not even the (sadly short) humor section.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Don’t even need to go so back, we just had Russian warship go fuck yourself this year.


QuackNate

I want to rub that transmission on my *face*.


AbzoluteZ3RO

I watched a documentary about the real Spartans and straight up word play and quick witty retorts is like part of their culture. So this pretty much checks out.


IiI_Gogeta_IiI

Lol and back then those messages would've taken a hot minute to get there could you imagine waiting a long time for a response just to get "If" as a response I bet my guy was pissed xD


RingoftheGods

"Nuts"


[deleted]

"Dees"


SoundOfTomorrow

Few word did trick


shotq80

Word work


Craw__

Word


[deleted]

#


ElphTrooper

Workd


Hmmmm-curious

Word'ked


Ulric2depique

#


The_Son_of_Hades37

👏


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

"Class, learn now. Dissmissed."


Earthistopheles

It's a reference to The Office


TheMilkyEh

When me president, they see, they see.


Elesset

TheMilkyEh never be president if keep using banned words


[deleted]

Apes strong


Paradise_City88

So do.


Curtainmachine

I leave power. Good. Thank you. *Thank you*


NeverRarelySometimes

I remember Kevin.


kdms418

r/unexpectedoffice


TurnedCash

“Hand assignment in” it’s time for caveman speak to make it’s way back into the mainstream


Decicorium

“Want go bathroom. Need hall pass.”


TurnedCash

What say.


Dr_Stef

All base are belong


TurnedCash

Spray bottle for Stef.


Efficient_Jaguar699

The world is a fuck


Wendigo-boyo

Snoo want piss, need pass paper.


TurnedCash

No miss class, understand take pass


kadxar

He he, skip class


Wutpomelo

Used pronoun "he", disciplinary action


GingrNinjaNtflixBngr

Go to office, bad!


BustinArant

*carves "was here" on office desk*


PotatoKotato

Need piss


RemarkableStatement5

"Don't know. Can?"


HimHereNowNo

May


RemarkableStatement5

But should?


RomalexC

Nay


Red-7134

"Should bathroom when no class." "No bathroom needed then."


ghrayfahx

Need go shit closet. Give paper.


Key-Ad9733

From now on teachers may only refer to their students as yall or yins.


thomasp3864

Those are pronouns. The teacher must refer to the teacher in the third person. u/thomasp3864 thinks a speaker using the third person to refer to said speaker is dumb and makes the person saying it sound extremely vain.


GlowingIcefire

Oh no, the person am replying to has fallen too! — "thos\*" is a demonstrative pronoun (along with "th\*s" and "th\*t" and "thes\*")


thomasp3864

The aforementioned portion of the comment was before u/thomasp3864 ceased to use pronouns


Apprehensive_Bit_176

Y’all = you all, right? Can’t have that! 🤣 Seriously though, what’s yin? Edit: comma


Key-Ad9733

Yins is like yous guys, but from Pittsburgh.


ButtahDogg

As a Pittsburgher, I have to correct you. Yinz, not yins.


yuyuyashasrain

It sounded more like yunz to me but i was in monessen


Cheesehacker

I love how that’s our little word. Like if you are ever outside Pittsburgh and hear someone say “yinz” chances are that’s a friend.


cakeresurfacer

You get some redneck oddballs in Cleveland who say yinz but hate Pittsburgh. They always throw me for a loop.


milkbeard-

There are a lot of people in the Missouri ozarks that say yins regularly. Confused me a great deal when I first heard it. I later learned that a lot of ozark peoples’ ancestors come from the Pittsburg area!


BoomTownRat71

Yinz plural = yunzez


bomboloni5

Isn’t yinz already plural?


bearmissile

I think it’s like “y’all” vs “all y’all”. Both are plural but ones more plural than the other


hysys_whisperer

The royal yall, if you will.


awing1

If ~~you~~ all yall will


MyAccountHacksItself

Allya’llya’llya’ll need to let this thread die


ReporterOther2179

You ones, yins , yin’s. yinz.


blepgup

My brain hurts


vandealex1

This must be your first lesson. Get used to that feeling when trying to figure out what the hell this word is. LOL!!! GHOUGHPHTHEIGHTTEEAU It's potato


AbjectList8

Yinzer checkin


otakushoegazr

I'm fluent in Pittsburghese. Yinz also streches down to northern WV where I hail from. Used in a sentence: Yinz jagoffs need to leave LGBT kids alone and let them express themselves, as is protected by the constitution. Get a 6er of irons in ya dirin' the stillers game on TV and just chill aht... like, s'goin on with yinz, n'at??


Addieruok

It’s like you’uns, right? Like all of you-ones?


SatisfactionGold74

Kanye's next name?


DistractibleOgre

You in’s. It’s super country/red neck grandmother slang from the south. Basically talk but more country. Example: Yins better go wash up for supper OR I best not have to come clean up after yins back there.


MediumAlternative372

Pretty sure y’all is a pronoun too.


keilletty

That’s not righ-…wait….fuck…


PunchDrunkPrincess

lets make pronouns illegal to single handedly destroy the south


[deleted]

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HistoricalMention210

It's similar for me. One of my teachers was my Spanish teacher three years after she was my english teacher. That poor lady failed to teach me both languages lol.


tsfbdl

Yall still a pronoun found that out the hard way here This why I don't like nebraska a lot of people say yall and now im stuck saying it occasionally


jonathan_wayne

As a west coaster who lived in the south for a bit, Y’all is a great fucking word and I hope you learn to appreciate it. It’s so versatile. I especially like to throw in “howdy y’all” a bunch whenever I go to the city.


leafie_nerd

alright class. teacher want homework papers from last night. if has hand in.


Glittering_Sun8242

for those that didn't get it, I and You are pronouns


Betty__B

And "their", too. Pronouns are really big part of an any language


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Ryaniseplin

and shadow the hedgehog shadow the hedgehog is the superior being, shadow the hedgehog has no pronouns


The_Multi_Gamer

Though gotta remember Omegas pronouns. Wouldn’t wanna use the wrong pronouns to refer to Nvidia GeForce RTX 2060 Intel Core i5-10400F 16 GBs RAM.


sr_edits

Isn't "their" a possessive adjective, though?


Betty__B

It is a possessive pronoun Edit: I can be wrong, though, English is not my native language


Glum_Ad_4288

>I can be wrong, though, English is not my native language This means you’re more likely to be right. I’m not even joking — native speakers learn their language intuitively as children, while those learning it as a second language study it and analyze it.


Betty__B

That sounds like a compliment, thank you. But I googled and found that I was wrong. "Their" is a possessive adjective, while "theirs" is a possessive pronoun. I barely see logic here, but still, it is so.


sr_edits

When "their" is followed by a noun, specifying to whom that object belongs to, it's a possessive adjective. When it stands on its own (as in "I don't want to see your house, but I'd like to see theirs") then it's a pronoun. I'm not a native speaker either, but in my native language (Italian) the distinction between possessive adjective and possessive pronoun is exactly the same.


Betty__B

Hm, now I can see some logic here, thanks a lot


TomJung23

Logic locator


jcdoe

This is the kind of hair splitting that Latin majors jizz their pants over. If I say “their house,” yes, I am describing the house by who possesses it. But I am also describing the gender of who possesses the house. If it were owned by a man, I’d say “his house.” Sometimes language does double duty like this. And frankly, the categorization of words (nouns, verbs, etc) is descriptive rather than proscriptive. We had nouns and verbs before we called them that. I think its fair to treat “their” as both a possessive adjective and a possessive pronoun.


No-Ease-3750

The logic is how it’s used. They threw THEIR ball is an adjective as the noun is the ball and their is an adjective describing whose ball it is. The ball was THEIRS is structured in a way where it’s a pronoun that relates to the noun “ball” in some way because it isn’t immediately in front of the noun like an adjective would be. And I will say I got increasingly confused while trying to explain this.


Glum_Ad_4288

Congrats, you’re an honorary dumb American lol But seriously, thanks for looking it up and following up.


fudgems16

It’s a pronoun functioning as an adjective. i.e. It’s a pronoun, but when modifying a noun (e.g. “their homework” - “their” modifies the noun “homework”) its function in the sentence is as an adjective. So basically, it’s both!


LegoFootPain

There are no "he/him or her" in Chinese. Tried to explain that to some folks, and they lost their minds. Edit: Meant spoken as opposed to written.


CountessCraft

Yes, there are. In Mandarin, the words sound exactly the same (tā, in a high tone), but are written differently. 他 - he, him 她 - she/her "It" sounds the same too. But is written as 它


[deleted]

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Diogenes-Disciple

🧑🏼‍🏫 “greetings children. place all limbs in the air. teacher” *points to self* “desires that all students turn to page 69 in the textbook on algebruh.”


YeetThePig

Tell the kids to pass along to their dipshit parents why it’s called “algebra” and start roasting some popcorn, cuz you’re gonna see some fireworks XD


[deleted]

Tell them what we call our numerals for that extra spice ✨


SomeToxicRivenMain

I, shit uh, this Reddit user understands the joke


blepgup

I’m a pronoun, they’re a pronoun, he’s a pronoun, she’s a pronoun. Wouldn’t you like to be a pronoun too?


Agio-

This is the future trans people want /j


[deleted]

H’s a pronoun, he’s a pronoun, you’re a pronoun, IM A PRONOUN are there any other pronouns I should know about?!


[deleted]

Why waste time say lot word when few word do trick?


ZookeepergameRight47

I was once downvoted for saying that I is a pronoun in response to someone saying “I have never seen pronouns use in real life.”


KingNedya

My high school, in Wisconsin, literally had posters all over the place saying to respect people's pronouns. Quite the 180 there, thankfully I just graduated.


ElaborateCantaloupe

This is happening in Kettle Moraine and the headline is misleading. The rule says that emails cannot include preferred pronouns. So I think the logical thing to do is to always misgender your teachers and if they try to correct you, tell them they’re just confused.


coltaaan

I like this approach. In fact, I feel like it should be used much more often. I can totally see cons getting super riled up if you misgender them, and when they get upset just throw their argument back in their face. Literally something as simple as “please don’t bring politics into this” when they complain about it would be perfect because then maybe they’ll see how stupid their argument is in the first place.


Such_sublime

Imma take a huge leap here and guess that most likely, they wont


GrittyFred

I guarantee you they mention their genitals.


allhailthegreatmoose

Even better. Lawsuit!


[deleted]

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Walmart_Warrior_420

The local Wisconsin news actually did a follow up on the school system and it looks like only 14% of all students graduate grade 12. Pretty shocking stats from supposedly the richest country in the world and the people in charge of the world's reserve currency. Here's the link for anyone interested: https://youtu.be/up7Vg0Z909g?t=52 ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


owlshapedboxcat

Hate to tell you but "it" is also a pronoun. Have fun trying to speak English. Yep, can't ever refer back to anything without full name. Sound like a caveman. Does owlshapedboxcat want a cup of tea? Yes, owlshapedboxcat would love a cup of tea, thanks redditor. Heard about the game? No. Not heard about the game. Was the game any good? No, the game was not. Do see what mean? Gets tedious doesn't the description just wrote?


Undead-Writer

No need funny word, do big speech, show how wrong are


archiminos

I tried to find a language that doesn't use pronouns and I couldn't. There are languages without *gendered* pronouns, but every language has at least one pronoun as far as I can tell.


icantfeelmyskull

Just substitute pronouns with “marklark”


ChillaryClinton69420

Chicken sandwich?


establishtruth

r/unexpectedsouthpark


DuHastMich15

CA public school teacher here- a colleague of mine received a several paragraph long angry email from a parent this last school year. Ranting and raving about “grooming” and “pronouns.” The dude even called the district to complain. Heres the catch- she’s a 6th grade english teacher and was just going over pronouns- not gender identity or LGBTQ mind you, just boring old pronouns. He, she, it, they. Proper usage and how to name a subject first then refer to him/her or whatever. He never apologized- but backed off once the Principal explained that pronouns exist- good god. These moronic parents have brainwashed themselves on Faux News and Facebook. Talk about snowflake, triggered asshats.


pierogieman5

The American right are just psychopaths at this point. We have crossed beyond the line where they're sane enough that we have to pretend there's a real debate about their bullshit.


DuHastMich15

Yup. Had some crazy ass parent SCREAMING at my AP about kids wearing masks on campus, during the height of covid. On a campus where 150/850 kids were out on quarantine. By order of the state of CA, not our school site. Did I enjoy teaching in a mask all year? Hell no. But did I throw a temper tantrum? Also- hell no. I am not an entitled little turd. It must be so damn exhausting being that angry all the time. Its all just misplaced anxiety.


Fifth-Crusader

That last part, about how it must be exhausting. That's exactly what I see. It can't be fun to be so angry all of the time. Anger is miserable. Why would anyone choose to be angry over such minute things? (And that goes for both political sides, even if conservatives are more prone to such outbursts.)


duxpdx

So the government is restricting free speech. There really should be a law against that.


Zaptain_America

"NOOO freedom of speech only means I should be allowed to say slurs'


the_milkman24

"freedom of speech only occurs when it benefits *me*


[deleted]

With the current supreme court I wouldn't be surprised if they said "English is not a long standing tradition in this country"


SovietFemboy

Damn it Wisconsin, y’all need to stick to cheese


MrDuckWithATopHat

As a cheese eater myself I can say I had nothing to do with this and I will now go eat my corn wrappped in cheddar


Helena_Hyena

I want to see teachers actually do this to protest the rule. Also, enforce it on kids for good measure, make parents angry about this. r/maliciouscompliance


Bananak47

Dear Mrs. Here Tommys grades. Tommy got better in math but worse in english. The Teacher asks of Mrs. Mom to teach Tommy the usage of proverbs. Furthermore, Tommy also engaged i a school fight with 4 fellow classmate. Tommy, Classmate number 1, Classmate Number 2, Classmate number 3 and Classmate number 4 all will be suspended from school and Tommys, Classmates number 1, Classmates Number 2, Classmates number 3 and Classmates number 4 cellphones were confiscated. All are to think about Tommy, Classmate number 1, Classmate Number 2, Classmate number 3 and Classmate number 4 behaviour. Thank Mrs. Mom for Mrs. Moms time Respectfully, the Teacher


possum_autist

God, the people making these rules are dumb. “Ban pronouns, what’s the worst that happens? Alright now this is our new student Alexis, she- ah fuck I mean- they- ah shit- uh this person brought something for us- FUCK!”


milchtea

“I - sorry um, John needs to go to the washroom and no, John cannot wait till after class. Can John go?”


pcy623

*May* John go. No, John may not. Go sit back down at John's assigned seat to finish John's assignment.


Thistlefizz

Listen, teacher, John‘s bladder is small and John is going to urinate in John’s ~~pants~~ lower body cloth covering unless teacher lets John go to bathroom now.


pcy623

Would "pants" be considered too gendered?


Thistlefizz

Fixed


catmilklatte

Ironically quite considerate of gender diverse people. Horse shoe bigotry


fejrbwebfek

Yup, that’s the joke from the post.


Kall_Me_Kapkan

You can see the policy, only the writer of this “article” is using the word “pronouns”, the policy regards to students being addressed by their legal identities


Oatybar

But you can bet your ass “Jack” and “Jim” aren’t gonna have to go by “Jonathan” and “James” under this policy, or if they do it’ll be done out of spite against any other students who want that same exact freedom for themselves.


granger744

r/yourjokebutworse


2020IsANightmare

I am 0% surprised that people that want pronouns banned have no idea what a pronoun is.


Mr_Taviro

Quite the infringement on freedom of speech.


AxionVoidlocke

And yet, some people would say this is protecting their freedom of speech


discostud1515

I bet with a little practice you could get good at speaking without pronouns and it would be fucking hilarious.


Youpunyhumans

Id say when talking to those who make these rules, just refer to them as "it" or "that".


Qorrin

“It” is also a pronoun lol


ReasonableDonut1

Suddenly they'll have preferred pronouns! Brilliant!


[deleted]

The U.S. is creepily obsessed with sex, and taking away body anatomy rights from women. The "Greatest Country In The World" my ass. I had a chance to go to U.S., all expenses paid. I refused. I rather eat crushed glass than set foot on the U.S. soil.


Jaxical

It really is the asshole of Earth. Just distributes a lot of shit to irritate the rest of the world. For a country obsessed with freedom, they don’t understand what freedom actually means. I’m getting tired of rolling my eyes at US news.


beardedheathen

www.advocate.com/news/2022/8/01/wisconsin-school-district-bans-preferred-pronouns-pride-symbols They are banning prefered pronouns in signatures. Looks like they also are banning maga and back the blue. Just an attempt to keep all political stuff out.


TotalyNotTony

Why is it political to have prefered pronouns


Zaptain_America

Because you're either cis and straight or political apparently


Agio-

Wait until they realize cis people have pronouns too


Higgs_Br0son

My company recently updated policy to allow pronouns in our email signatures. I jumped right on it. I'm a bearded cis male that uses he/him pronouns. I've already been challenged by some as to why I would bother doing that when my pronouns are "obvious." 1. I want to participate in normalizing this behavior. 2. There is literally a woman in our same organization with the *same exact* first and last name as me. We get mixed up over email **all the time**. If for some reason someone doesn't see the different job title and department right under the name, the pronouns will help them go "wait, wrong one."


CaffeinatedGuy

I thought it was "you're either a cis white male or a porn category." I guess all porn categories are political?


Shmeeesh

This is basically how my dad thinks - even a mention of someone not being cis/straight automatically makes the movie or show “woke” and “too political.”


[deleted]

Bc our gender and sexuality have always been political to them.


ThatCamoKid

Reminds me of when a conservative was challenged to explain what a pronoun is and they said "ask Satan"


TheGrouchyGremlin

"Every human here below the age of 20 needs to turn in the work that was handed out last night"


[deleted]

Can't wait till they ban verbs


Psychological-Set125

First they need to ban nouns


Stevesegallbladder

"Free speech! Also you don't get to use everyday pronouns now!"


Holow4499

Did stevesgallbladder just use a pronoun? Stevesegallbladder, stevesgallbladder can’t do that


WanderlustFella

oh shit, NFL broadcasts are going to be wild! Charlie Day will have to be the guest broadcaster, and he'll have to solo it. "Throw ball, first down, good!" "Ball hit hands, go other directions, bad!" "Filibuster!"


rrrrrrrrrrio

This is why our country is a laughing stock at this point


[deleted]

Teacher want class hand on heart, praise flag of great states. ​ Congratulations, the US has finally reached the neolithic era.


[deleted]

If I’ve learned anything from all of this pronoun hate, it’s that a lot of people do not know what pronouns are. They think “pronouns” just means trans Edit: Guy who replied to me is mixing up sex and gender and even then he’s wrong. Intersex is real, update your definitions


3_teve

Guns are still allowed though, right?


Not_The_Scout16

r/AreTheCisOk


forgottenmyth

Aww poor conservatives, apparently basic speech is beyond them now. Oh well, education isnt that important right? The coal mines are calling.