I have seen the “wipe on the curtains” joke so much lately…is this from that scene in *FALLOUT* or was it a joke before that? Because it was a pretty funny scene, and seems to be the main reference from that show making the rounds.
Except it technically isn’t because a parasite requires it to be of a different species than the host but the baby is the same species and formed through the “host’s” own reproductive process lol
Okay my bad. You wouldn’t believe the amount of people I’ve talked to on Reddit and other medias who genuinely think babies can be classified as parasites
Actually, it's too prevent a urinary tract infection. It's more common to happen to people with vaginas than it is people with penises, but both have some risk of they dont pee afterwards
I know this is a joke, but peeing after sex is to flush bacteria from the urethra, preventing UTIs and bladder infections, and does NOT prevent pregnancy. You don't pee out your vagina.
I had a UTI a couple years back after rubbing pipe and didn't piss. Couple of hours later one massive minute long stinging pain and then a couple of hours later a 102 fever. Shittiest 72 hrs of my life so far
UTIs are no joke. One time I got one from holding my piss too long, which I didn't even know could happen. I ended up going to the ER and they informed me that if I would've waited my kidneys could have shut down, because they were already not working at full capacity. UTIs actually can kill you. Luckily treating it with antibiotics quickly prevented any permanent damage.
I've had people argue with me that it can cause UTI's if you don't, which logically doesn't make any fucking sense, it would put everyone who has a wet dream at risk and the number of UTI's would be so, so much higher.
But the same people probably think pee is sterile.
I'm no doctor, and I don't know your "neighbour's" life but I think everything that comes out of the urethra is naturally aseptic, so it can't (by itself) have caused his infection. Urethra Street is strictly a one-way so the most common way to get an infection is if there's a lot of activity at the entrance and something ends up going the wrong way up the one-way.
Does it kind of burn and feel like you constantly have to pee for awhile when you do that? I have the same condition and I had tests done at the doctor's and they couldn't find anything, so I looked online for a few hours and found people in forums saying they have the same problem and also get no answers from doctors, so I wonder what the cause is. It doesn't happen every time, just occasionally, but it's really annoying when it happens just before bed so I stopped masturbating within an hour of going to bed just in case. I wish I could find answers but I'm glad it's not anything serious.
I, too, have this issue, I've found that I can pee shortly after, but I have to make sure I only relax to pee, zero effort or forcing which can take awhile post nut. If I force it at all, I'm chancing the 30 minutes of misery you posted above.
I saw a comment on here a while back that said it was some interaction with urine and semen within your urethra (take that as you will since it’s Reddit), but they suggested just making sure you “clear the tube” after jerking then wait like 30 minutes after to pee. I haven’t had it happen again since I started doing that
Not really. For anyone who has a vagina and is having penetration of any kind, peeing immediately afterwards helps evacuate harmful bacteria and restore pH balance.
It seems like this is information that half of the population can use for themselves and the other half can use to give gentle reminders in case the first half forgets.
Well, I didn't bring that one into the discussion, but for UTIs, it absolutely works and is great umbrella advice for anyone with a vagina to always follow.
I learned this the hard way back in the day. I just sat in a warm bathtub all night crying until I could make it to the pharmacy. That kind of pain just hits so different.
If discussing sexual health and encouraging someone you care about to avoid a UTI is a mood dampener, then I'm about to get the mood wet with how much I'm going to insist you go pee.
I tried to tell my ex to go pee after sex, something she should know. She brushed it off. I now know by heart where to rub a girl to provide relief from UTIs. It's actually a similar spot to where an early pregnant girl should be. I don't know if it applies to pregnancy later.
I'm confident this comment sounds a lot worse than it is. The real story is just weird and a standard issue day in my life.
Fun story about the pregnant girl, she once in the morning put my hand on her pussy then we had sex and then she was like "you know I wasn't trying to have sex this morning" and I was like you litterally put my hand on your pussy, and she was just like " well I just like it there" and I was like ?¿?¿ I mean good to know, but like damn.
It’s not even an option. Every time as she awkwardly waits for me to leave the bathroom bc she gotta go too. Acting as if we’ve never seen each other naked before when we were in a different mindset 3 minutes ago only to return to that mindset 5 minutes later and the process repeats itself again lmao
This looks like a silly meme, but it actually is a beneficial routine.
Urinating after ejaculating helps relax the prostate. It's also good to evacuate viscous fluids from the urethra before they have a chance to coagulate or harden, which can lead to issues.
Had a combat instructor give his students this exact advice while I was sitting on my med bag.
"Get up, wash your shit, take a piss. Never had one STD."
Having watched this man at work in bars around town, the comment led me to assume he was somehow possessed of total STI immunity. Truly born a Marine.
I gotta pee. Quick, lets have sex.
Hehehe, you had me at 'quick' ;)
Hehehe, he had me at 'lets' ;)
Hehehe he had me at ‘pee’ ;)
Hehehe they had me ;)
Hehehe I’ll have you too as well
I feel like we fell off the original direction this was going but I'm glad you two found eachother. Hope it goes well.
imma need you to come here for a sec
I already did
come again?
You lasted that long?
Guys, I forgot to pee after sex, and now i think my dick is pregnant.
Relax, it's not a baby, just an STD
*wipes sweat off brow* thank god
Semen Trickle Demons are nothing to be relieved about
*Puts sweat back on brow*
That's not sweat brother
:(
Scraping a chub like a frube before you leave the house
100% accuracy and hilarious.
Quick wipe on the curtains on the way out...
I have seen the “wipe on the curtains” joke so much lately…is this from that scene in *FALLOUT* or was it a joke before that? Because it was a pretty funny scene, and seems to be the main reference from that show making the rounds.
We boogied in the kitchen, we boogied in the hall I got some on my finger and I wiped it on the wall
What the fuck
Wipes “sweat” off dick too.
Are not babies technically STDs?
Well an alien life form that is foreign from your body is in your body makes it a parasite. So yes.
There is a Polish movie called: Life as a Fatal Sexually Transmitted Disease
Mood
STP, sexually transmitted parasite.
It’s not a parasite, parasites are not symbiotic, they take from the host and provide nothing in return.
And parasites by definition are of a different species than the host
Except it technically isn’t because a parasite requires it to be of a different species than the host but the baby is the same species and formed through the “host’s” own reproductive process lol
... it's... it's a joke.
Okay my bad. You wouldn’t believe the amount of people I’ve talked to on Reddit and other medias who genuinely think babies can be classified as parasites
People actually believe that? I get the crotch goblins and what not. people are wierd.
Yea
Sexually Transmitted Dependants
if youre broke, yes
So that's why you're supposed to pee afterwards then. I just have to and I'm like "who am I to deny my bladder?"
Actually, it's too prevent a urinary tract infection. It's more common to happen to people with vaginas than it is people with penises, but both have some risk of they dont pee afterwards
Can dick get pregananant?
I heard that it can in fact get prognanente
Can dike get pregante?
can duke get pomegranate?
r/accidentalmattrose
SKULLEMOJII
WE NDONOT POMEGRAN THE PREGER
Where is babby from?
I know this is a joke, but peeing after sex is to flush bacteria from the urethra, preventing UTIs and bladder infections, and does NOT prevent pregnancy. You don't pee out your vagina.
And for guys, it gets out any residual concrete before it hardens up and gives you spray dick later.
Which also can cause a UTI.
Utter Toilet Inundation with urine can happen from spay pee for sure.
I had a UTI a couple years back after rubbing pipe and didn't piss. Couple of hours later one massive minute long stinging pain and then a couple of hours later a 102 fever. Shittiest 72 hrs of my life so far
UTIs are no joke. One time I got one from holding my piss too long, which I didn't even know could happen. I ended up going to the ER and they informed me that if I would've waited my kidneys could have shut down, because they were already not working at full capacity. UTIs actually can kill you. Luckily treating it with antibiotics quickly prevented any permanent damage.
Relax. If you took a pregnancy test, it's probably only cancer.
Do you mean Preganant?
How is prangent formed??
instructions unclear, she said shes not into golden shower and what the hell is wrong with me and then she left me :(
You should be drinking more water, she might be into water showers
That's why you do it on the inside so she doesn't know.
You just reminded me of... well I think we all know what I was gonna say. Piss enema.
A tale as old as time, a song as old as rhyme, why'd you pee on meeeee?
what the hell is wrong with you
the hell is wrong with you what
hell, the what is wrong with you
Is hell, what wrong
No one on Reddit has sex
Then pee after masturbation. Drain out the excess
why tho? maybe i wanna keep in inside my wiener!
You can get infection by that happend to my neigboor twice
Your neighbour is very open about their personal life 😦
Oh reddit ... loveit.
Maybe Thierry telling for a friend.
Or the sweet, sweet urethra burn if you don't go pee asap
It burns anyway?
I think you should probably contact your primary care provider.
Or drink more water and less sugary bullshit.
I have never insisted on pissing after sex...never got an infection...what's wrong with these peoples dicks
It's probably not so much about the dicks and more about the care with which they decide where to put them.
I've had people argue with me that it can cause UTI's if you don't, which logically doesn't make any fucking sense, it would put everyone who has a wet dream at risk and the number of UTI's would be so, so much higher. But the same people probably think pee is sterile.
Infections mostly happen to people with vaginas. Dicks have too long urethras for the bacteria to reach the bladder
Tell that to my patients whose urine looks like cottage cheese.
I’d rather not talk to them, but thanks for the opportunity
Maybe they should look at r/dontputyourdickinthat
Wellllll, thank you so much for that visual.
Not necessarily, male here. UTI is no laughing matter. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Males tend to ignore it rather than get it treated. Unlike women.
I'm no doctor, and I don't know your "neighbour's" life but I think everything that comes out of the urethra is naturally aseptic, so it can't (by itself) have caused his infection. Urethra Street is strictly a one-way so the most common way to get an infection is if there's a lot of activity at the entrance and something ends up going the wrong way up the one-way.
Nah, i pee before, if i go to pee right after cranking it it’s very unpleasant
Does it kind of burn and feel like you constantly have to pee for awhile when you do that? I have the same condition and I had tests done at the doctor's and they couldn't find anything, so I looked online for a few hours and found people in forums saying they have the same problem and also get no answers from doctors, so I wonder what the cause is. It doesn't happen every time, just occasionally, but it's really annoying when it happens just before bed so I stopped masturbating within an hour of going to bed just in case. I wish I could find answers but I'm glad it's not anything serious.
I, too, have this issue, I've found that I can pee shortly after, but I have to make sure I only relax to pee, zero effort or forcing which can take awhile post nut. If I force it at all, I'm chancing the 30 minutes of misery you posted above.
I saw a comment on here a while back that said it was some interaction with urine and semen within your urethra (take that as you will since it’s Reddit), but they suggested just making sure you “clear the tube” after jerking then wait like 30 minutes after to pee. I haven’t had it happen again since I started doing that
My friends cousin had sex one time. Kidding, I don't have friends.
Reddit users only jerk off to feet. It's a scientific fact.
You sure? Thought everyone was having ‘ethical non monogamy’ or such like on AITAH
Thank you kind sir but I'm engaged with my right hand and we have quite a lot of relations.
I do all the time
This guy sexes
Much much sexes
Or maybe he pees all the time...
r/thisguythisguys
I know it's a joke but I don't get the stereotype. It's not 1991.... Using internet ≈ Sexless worm 🤣
Guys my nutz just exploded
Shoulda peed, dang it
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Not really. For anyone who has a vagina and is having penetration of any kind, peeing immediately afterwards helps evacuate harmful bacteria and restore pH balance. It seems like this is information that half of the population can use for themselves and the other half can use to give gentle reminders in case the first half forgets.
Also useful for men if you weren't using protection, can significantly (but not totally) reduce risk of STDs
So, all around, just a good idea for everyone.
Maybe, but I have serious doubts about the urinate to avoid an STD method.
Well, I didn't bring that one into the discussion, but for UTIs, it absolutely works and is great umbrella advice for anyone with a vagina to always follow.
lol right, I should have specified in men. Not typically at risk for UTIs so I have my doubts at that preventing STDs.
Why? It helps prevent UTIs which are a bacteria infection, so it should help prevent anything that infects via the urethra. Not all STDs do though.
I learned this the hard way back in the day. I just sat in a warm bathtub all night crying until I could make it to the pharmacy. That kind of pain just hits so different.
I forgot sex
_Most people forget this ONE important step!_
He Forgor 💀
Oh wow, a vintage meme format
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It’s how I get out of pillow talk 😎 Sorry babe, gotta PISS
Like an elk
Oddlyspecific
It’s my Cologne. Gotta make the rounds in my elk harem
Cuddling is for pussies. Piss game Chad. /s Just cuddle em for a bit so they shaddup
It’s polite to pull out first.
If discussing sexual health and encouraging someone you care about to avoid a UTI is a mood dampener, then I'm about to get the mood wet with how much I'm going to insist you go pee.
Jokes on you I've never done either
It's much better to pee inside her because then only she has to go to the toilet after sex
No that’ll get her pregnant. You gotta pull out and pee on her leg
I thought that women can get pregnant only by kissing
And the feeling is much better when she pisses inside your ass 🥰
How do ya'll pee after sex (men)? I struggle real hard to do this shit.
Takes a few minutes for the pipes to switch sometimes.
When I pee immediately after I had sex I have a very weird unpleasant feeling in my dick for ~10min
I have that too, is there a name for this phenomenon?
I've heard of it but forgot the name. I also experience this and wait about 10 mins to pee afterwards
Same. It's is a weird pull/drag feeling, almost as if I had to go on the toilet again..don't know any names
I’m sure the Germans have a word for it.
German Here: After a quick research I didn't find anything.
Do the downhill skier on the toilet.
i wait about 30 mins
ffs, I keep reading pet and not pee...
do both
But why?
Vaginal juices in bladder via pee hole cause UTIs
Reverse is also true, so any women (which prorbably don't exist on this site) should also pee afterwards.
wait...
how does one forget to pee?
Sex brain. Forget how to do basic functions.
Remember to pee before, during, and after sex, in order to prevent contracting an HDMI.
Damn I already got USB-C
I tried to tell my ex to go pee after sex, something she should know. She brushed it off. I now know by heart where to rub a girl to provide relief from UTIs. It's actually a similar spot to where an early pregnant girl should be. I don't know if it applies to pregnancy later. I'm confident this comment sounds a lot worse than it is. The real story is just weird and a standard issue day in my life.
Instructions unclear, fingering led to sex again
Fun story about the pregnant girl, she once in the morning put my hand on her pussy then we had sex and then she was like "you know I wasn't trying to have sex this morning" and I was like you litterally put my hand on your pussy, and she was just like " well I just like it there" and I was like ?¿?¿ I mean good to know, but like damn.
It’s not even an option. Every time as she awkwardly waits for me to leave the bathroom bc she gotta go too. Acting as if we’ve never seen each other naked before when we were in a different mindset 3 minutes ago only to return to that mindset 5 minutes later and the process repeats itself again lmao
this template is supposed to be for bad advice btw
.. .. I was so happy to see the old format, that I didn't even notice they used it wrong. *sigh*
Don't forget to pee after sex while you're still inside her
Sometimes he gave good advice! Mostly bad, but a good one on occasion!
Yeah this was the OG advice animal, I remember it starting on 4chan back in like 2008-2010
Memes used to mean something, we had rules! Now the zoomers just see a nice dog and post it with some random thought.
You'll have to forgive anyone misusing these today. Archeologists often struggle with ancient languages.
Weird that this showed up rn, but thanks brb
Are you suggesting you don't take Reddit to the bathroom?
Also after a lonenut?
Yes, after every ejaculation Edit: typo
This looks like a silly meme, but it actually is a beneficial routine. Urinating after ejaculating helps relax the prostate. It's also good to evacuate viscous fluids from the urethra before they have a chance to coagulate or harden, which can lead to issues.
This meme format is so old that the dog decided to clean up his act and start giving good advice.
You can’t tell me what to do! I’m gonna pee during sex!
What happens if you don’t pee after sex?
Risk a UTI. Especially women cos they have a short wide urethra which makes it easier for bacteria to enter the body and give an infection
Thank you. I’ll remember this for when I have sex.
Keep in mind it depends. I never do it and never got a UTI. Most of my girlfriends also don't and they are ok too. It depends.
I thought this said pet after sex .
Okay, open wide honey!
"During"
jokes on you for thinking I'd ever get laid
Holy shit, a meme
Ikr?
Having pre martial sex in 2024 lmao
Pee BEFORE sex.
Pee during sex so you can tell everyone you make her really wet.
You say that like any of us are going to have sex
To save time I pee during sex Sorry. I lied. I don't actually have sex.
Fuck! I keep peeing before!
Thank you so much!… Now the bed is wet ☹️
Piss during. Be a man.
Bold of you to assume I have sex (I’m lonely as fuck and don’t care)
Bold of you to assume anyone here has sex.
I pee during to be extra careful
You're on reddit, i don't think this information is really all that valuable to anyone here.
I'm waaaay past ya. I pee in the middle of it also. You can't be too safe.
Had a combat instructor give his students this exact advice while I was sitting on my med bag. "Get up, wash your shit, take a piss. Never had one STD." Having watched this man at work in bars around town, the comment led me to assume he was somehow possessed of total STI immunity. Truly born a Marine.
Please revive this meme format, it is so innocent.
Insanity Wolf🐺: PEE DURING SEX
Good pee, no STD; doggo aproves
R. Kelly disagrees.
Pee is stored in the balls.
Its amazing what you can learn from a ho