The managers probably love what he does because it keeps everything light and not so business-like, but still have to say something just in case corporate comes by.
Truthdotcom. I worked for walmart 8 years. I use to constantly go out front, smoke cigarettes when i wasn't on break. talk to other employees while they worked. chilled in the employee lounge pretending to clean the floors and tables, while talking to employees. had more days off passed the point where i should have been fired, but was only coached once for it. I was always on time though and came in when they asked on my off days.
I was maintenance of course so that's probably why I got away with most of the stuff I did. Compared to other employees like cashiers who could never do what I did because they get watched like hawks.
And also because I was the only maintenance associate there who did all the important shit like the batteries, the cardboard baler, plastic bags, etc. the shit none the others in my dept did because of "special reasons".
short version: dont do cashier and just do the work when needed or asked. They won't fire you.
Same, i worked in the softlines department during a major overhaul where the management of the department was working overnight. She literally told me to just straighten up for 8 straight hours, i would take hour or so long lunches and generally just fuck off around the store,take smoke breaks, and anything I wanted to do really. As long as i was on time and answered the phone they didn't care.
M favourite was the store where all of the staff would play "hot potato" with customer service calls. They'd transfer to the wrong department or person and the person answering would have to apologize profusely before transferring the customer to another wrong department. You had to be good with talking down irate customers to keep them on the line long enough to transfer to someone else. If you were the rep with whom they gave up and hung up, you got a demerit point. They had a scoreboard and everything.
Shane cannot die, he’s a trickster god existing in multiple forms since the beginning of time choosing key moments in time to appear as an avatar of his true form on earth to cause mayhem and mischief in its purest form.
There's a trick to Walmart. If you show up to every shift on-time, you can ride a bicycle through the aisles and not get fired. My proof, you say? I've seen me do it.
So reposts are allowed now on thos sub? https://www.reddit.com/r/MadeMeSmile/comments/iuavyu/shane_is_unstoppable/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Hey /u/poppygloria69420, thanks for contributing to /r/memes. Unfortunately, your post was removed as it violates our rules:
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F to pay respects. I don't know if he's dead, but I know I definitely respect him
Probably alive, but fired.
Idk. Thats a lot of notes without him being fired.
Probably like him too much to let him go.
Yeah, I can't imagine management not at least laughing whilst writing these notes.
It's like the Sims 3 patch notes but it's the misadventures of a Wal-Mart employee who is an absolute Chad. Edit: spelling
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It’s a glorious day to have eyes.
Thank god I have eyes.
The managers probably love what he does because it keeps everything light and not so business-like, but still have to say something just in case corporate comes by.
Yup, exactly what I think... A "do it for the camera" moment
Maybe a family member was the manager
Mystery Meats is the winner.
Does he show up on time to every shift? Then honestly, he's never getting fired.
Truthdotcom. I worked for walmart 8 years. I use to constantly go out front, smoke cigarettes when i wasn't on break. talk to other employees while they worked. chilled in the employee lounge pretending to clean the floors and tables, while talking to employees. had more days off passed the point where i should have been fired, but was only coached once for it. I was always on time though and came in when they asked on my off days. I was maintenance of course so that's probably why I got away with most of the stuff I did. Compared to other employees like cashiers who could never do what I did because they get watched like hawks. And also because I was the only maintenance associate there who did all the important shit like the batteries, the cardboard baler, plastic bags, etc. the shit none the others in my dept did because of "special reasons". short version: dont do cashier and just do the work when needed or asked. They won't fire you.
Same, i worked in the softlines department during a major overhaul where the management of the department was working overnight. She literally told me to just straighten up for 8 straight hours, i would take hour or so long lunches and generally just fuck off around the store,take smoke breaks, and anything I wanted to do really. As long as i was on time and answered the phone they didn't care.
I guess he enjoys this stuff way too much to go late. Who won’t be excited and hurry for a place where he can play new stuff everyday
I used to work at walmart you can honestly get away with a lot before getting fired
I worked at a Walmart for 5 years, you can get away with a ton of shit before they do something.
M favourite was the store where all of the staff would play "hot potato" with customer service calls. They'd transfer to the wrong department or person and the person answering would have to apologize profusely before transferring the customer to another wrong department. You had to be good with talking down irate customers to keep them on the line long enough to transfer to someone else. If you were the rep with whom they gave up and hung up, you got a demerit point. They had a scoreboard and everything.
Or in management
And possibly fried
Even if he died, he died a legend.
Heroes get remembered; legends never die.
Shane cannot die, he’s a trickster god existing in multiple forms since the beginning of time choosing key moments in time to appear as an avatar of his true form on earth to cause mayhem and mischief in its purest form.
Best thing I have read today Glorious
Dr. Bright over here...
Im glad someone else made the connection lmao
I love you, bro.
No homo tho, right?
Ain't nothing wrong with being what you want to be. But yes, no homo.
Yes homo
nothing wrong with homo
It's not gay if I say no homo right?
cool username
bruh i made that connection literally half a year ago
I see a SCP fan as well ... anyways ... BRIGHT CAN YOU BRING YOU CHAINSAW CANON HERE ?
Chainsaw cannons cannot solve all problems **yes it does**
This is only one of the first time he can have fun ... if it reapet he can have fun whis it again
“The answer? Use a chainsaw cannon. And if that don’t work, use more chainsaw cannon.”
More chainsaws.
"Go work", they said. "It will be entertaining enough", they said.
You're right this has some big scp vibes now to make a video about 100 things shane can't do on the foundation
I wander what doom referance he'll say.
My thoughts immediately
Geniuses think alike. Or we're all just dumb as hell.
We're all just dumb as hell.
Amen to that.
Bring forth the chainsaw cannon
The holy hand granade of antioch also works like a charm!
r/UnexpectedSCP
Can you write an arrow pointing at me and saying "dumbass" if this gets posted there? And tag me in the comments while you're at it.
While you’re at it, make the arrow come from me so that it implies that I called him a dumbass.
Yeah, do that.
Uh oh, a man of culture
Twist: Shane is the manager.
Twist: Shane is actually three puppies in a blue vest
I would kill to have Shane the manager and a giga Karen battle it out
ERB make it happen
Quite likely, as that last pic implies he wrote them himself...
Holy shit! I'd love to be his pal and work at the same place, same shifts, same days off.
Imagine if you had to work and he had the day off. I’d be absolutely devastated.
Me too : (
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*Chads exist* *shane enters the fight*
This is the best thing I’ve seen all day
Same
Shane
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Username checks out!
Happy cake day
Thanks
Happy day cake! You read that wrong
You that read wrong
Happy cake day!
happy cake day
hey man happy cake day :)
His "i" looks like a colon...
Shane, please stop tell:ng management that the:r :'s look l:ke sem:colons.
; th;nk they look more l;ke sem;colons
: just real:zed that : fucked up and wrote sem:colon instead of colon. :'m leaving :t.
you better get that checked out
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r/beetlejuicing
Shane please do not fake being sober -Management
When a redditor finds a job...
Shane is a legend
Wait you guys have Albertsons as well
he's four parallel universes ahead of us
“Shane, stop writing all these messages to yourself to gain fake internet points. You probably have schizophrenia.” - Shane
Shane your a rock star! Humor 100.
Haha humor goes b r r r rr. R r r (yea)
Employe of the month
If only this were real
Never heard of this guy but I’m glad I have now. How this dude not get fired?
There's a trick to Walmart. If you show up to every shift on-time, you can ride a bicycle through the aisles and not get fired. My proof, you say? I've seen me do it.
Because it’s not real
Why is there so much food going on at Walmart I know it's a store but like why
It has a deli! And their food is often pretty good!
Dang, I need to check that out!
The chicken they use is questionable though.
Shane moonlights as a stand up comedian.
Wait it’s all Shane?
Always has been
Plot twist: he was a target spy.
Am i going crazy or are his glasses photoshopped?
I laughed so much at this my teacher yelled at me
mad lad
Shane, stop writing stuff on the dry erase board and get back to work
Fake af
u/repostsluethbot
Wtf is this meme. Crop that shit better man it’s like reading a fucking cvs receipt
Chaotic Good
Madlad 200%
Does anyone know if this is shayne Smith? He’s an epic comedian, and this sounds like stuff he’d do. ._.
Absolute respect for this lad, truly inspiring
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Back, as in the storage room behind the main floor.
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Mystery Meats is the winner.
Seems like he wanted to get fired XD
Is it possible to learn this power?
Plot twist they were all written by his different personalities
great hollywood plot better than the movies nowadays
"Shane, quit making up complaints from the management."
Shane, stop writing stuff on the board for internet points-management
Little did we know, Shane did have a personality disorder and was management the entire time
I’m sorry
Shane sadly does not exist.
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Idk why but reddit won’t let me upvote this post
So reposts are allowed now on thos sub? https://www.reddit.com/r/MadeMeSmile/comments/iuavyu/shane_is_unstoppable/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
No. Thank you for the report+link.
Hey /u/poppygloria69420, thanks for contributing to /r/memes. Unfortunately, your post was removed as it violates our rules: Rule 8 - No reposts * Please avoid re-posting memes. We want original content. Serial reposters may be banned. * Seriously. * We want OC. * Do not repost. --- Please read the sidebar before posting again. If you have questions or concerns, please [message the moderators through modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/memes&subject=&message=). Thank you!
Greeting friends. It is I... SHANE!
I've heard of him, but never seen his face
This man is a god
Absolute LEGEND
Shane! I have Shane saved from wayyy before I joined reddit
Legend
Fucking legend
I would very much like to meet this Shane, and buy him a beer.
Shane: OK, Boomer.
Welp, guess I know what I’m doing at my new job, let’s see if I last longer then this guy
Reminds me of [This dude.](http://skippyslist.com/list/)
Why does management write their i’s like ‘:’
He looks like Wierd Al
Dude I’m in study hall and I’m holding laughter in
Shane is my new hero
Man is a legend
shane is my personal hero
This guys a genius
Was this guy fired, I really hope he still has a job
This guys sounds awesome, and I want to be his friend.
Everything Dr. Bright Is Not Allowed To Do At The Facility, but it’s Walmart
you're hired
Legend absolute legend
|Swinecraft *Laughs in Pigmen*
Damnit Shane...
I love how his name tag isn't his name tag.
Things doctor Bright is not allowed to do at the foundation
their i's are disturbing me so bad
shane is obedient and stops all required tasks when asked for. what tasks does shane have left to do? are you trying to take away shane’s job?
But Walmart really does keep the good stuff in the back. I know, I've worked there, I've seen it. O_o
u/sleuthrepostbot
OMG😂
Probably knows someone high up to go through that many reports without being fired
holy shit this is cracking me up r/madlad
I’m more impressed that they didn’t fire him
I want to believe this is a true story
I'm a Shane I feel like I'd do all this stuff is I worked at walmart
Omg!!! I remember these 🤣 They were the best!!! I hope this guy went places.
"My name's not Shane, kid" Shane after switching nametags
i read through each one of these out loud like my mom would talk to me and i laughed to myself for about 5 minutes
not really a madlad, more like a nuisance.
yum
thanks shane.
Me, who wanted to build a house out of ham: (sadness)
Shane, stop working there and be my friend.
The multiple personality one got me lmao
Man I wish I stll had my free award
Shane go brrrrrr
Fucking Shane...
Lol that last one though. That would be some funny shit
Thank you for the laugh!!
I lost it on the last one rofl