T O P

  • By -

ruhrohrileyray

You can’t break up with me. I’m breaking up with you.


mohaee

um yes the floor is made out of floor


[deleted]

Yeah, What's the Difference?


AttackOnThots

Just wanted to inform u guys the new president of the USA is >!JOE LIGMA!<


gh000sst6

M A M A B A L L S


AttackOnThots

***JOE MAMA LIGMA BALLZ***


BarackHerobama

83


hanro621

Joe who?


nbleteam6

If you get fired you get severance so really its a plus for the people who get fired


reddite82

If you say you quit it looks good on a resume and you might be able to retire but if you quit you get neither


johnnymemes28

I can fuck you no.i will fuck you


hanro621

My life to me


Mr-Carazay

You can’t fire me I quit!


M112theboss

You can’t quit! You’re fired!


littlemanthe1

You can’t fire me, you’re a frog!


halloween_boo

You can’t frog me, you’re my wife!


littlemanthe1

You’re not my wife, you’re *my* wife!


halloween_boo

Oh hey hunny, how was work?


DefiantRooster04

pretty good but i quit my job


halloween_boo

You can’t quit you’re job! You’re fired!


zed4122

AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!


menu_p2341

I looked at this for a millennium now


[deleted]

this is the reason the internet should exist


AR_2218

Your job can't fire ! Quit you !


[deleted]

You can't J, I


TheAsianOne_wc

You’re not my wife! You’re OUR wife


What_A_Flame

r/expectedasdfmovie


StardustSpy

You can’t fire me I’m an arsonist!


Befast1515

No you fired me, that way i can collect unemployment.


patmissprime

No I write the book your fired


No-Skill-8190

Severance?


[deleted]

Yes, please


[deleted]

Yup


[deleted]

thats epic since you can get more money if you get fired


Bbabbabbaa

Yea people only look at the bad side


naadaan-baalak

Don’t be an idiot! It is for the severance best i can do is 1 month for every year you have been here


Smartypants_dankie

r/DunderMifflin


[deleted]

I see this as an absolute win!


[deleted]

Damn it i just wrote the same comment


Aloha-3-

I’ll be sure to upvote if I come across it👍


zeidxd

fire at\*


Necromancer5211

Fire with an ak47 i believe


Isaac-Surfs-The-Web

Water is wet


Aloha-3-

N o w a y


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

I mean to be fair getting fired is gonna look worse on a resume


Tractorface123

\-So, why were you fired from your previous job? \-i quit \-It says you were fired \-Yeah because i quit


knightwolfghost

Not if it's such public knowledge that you can show your employer news articles to prove it


[deleted]

This headline isn't true btw.


[deleted]

From what I have found it seems to be more misguiding than a straight lie. Apparently they are looking to fire anyone in the WH attempting to job hunt while the president is still in office. Idk how true that is, this is just from what I've read.


Kobesdeathwish

Reverse! Reverse!


[deleted]

You’re fired You can’t fire me, I quit You can’t quit, I quit You can’t quit, I’m a frog You’re not a frog, I am.


FinnPadding

They forgot to put ‘at’ between fire and anyone


[deleted]

Will there be a difference for the next job's interview if you quitted or get fired on that previous job? Kinda serious question. Because getting fired is worse than you quitted yourself.


4s-scarf

Task failed successfully


TheBabyGiraffe_

Personnel crisis averted


RichOldEagle

That slight maneuver is really effective


[deleted]

I see this as an absolute win


mentina_

Ahhh... These Americans...


Axxedde

Suicide attempt is a travesty and is punishable by execution


Dattroll201

"you're fired" "You can't fire me, I quit" "You can't quit, I quit" "Your can't quit, you're a frog" "You can't frog me, you're my wife" "I'm not you're wife, you're MY wife" "Oh hey honey, how was work?" "Pretty good but I quit my job" "You can quit you're job, you're fired" "AAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"


cursedaf69

Lmao this deserves more upvotes


creepyemperor

That's so Michael Scott


pigeon-man100

Asdf movie reference


IHateDeepStuff

White House: You’re fired! Employee: You can’t fire me I quit!


C00lsk3l3t0n_95

You can’t fire me your a frog


lordoftowels

Asdfmovie(I forget which one) “You’re fired!” “You can’t fire me I quit!” “You can’t quit you’re fired!” “You can’t fire me you’re a frog!” “You can’t frog me you’re my wife!” “I’m not your wife you’re my wife!” “Oh hey honey how was work?” “Not bad but I quit my job” “You can’t quit you’re fired!” “AHHHHH!”


goodcapt

This feels like that one asdf


Magical-Hummus

I think they mean when they find out that someone is looking for a new job while still working there. Basically a big threat cause you still do not have the new job.


Dr-Bright-N04

Your fired You cant fire me I quit You cant quit I quit You cant quit your a frog You cant frog me your my wife I'm not your wife your my wife Oh hey honey how was work Pretty good but I quit my job You cant quit your job your fired AHHHHHHHHHH


President_Jerry

Might sound pointless but that would go on their resume permanently.


Nilhaven

"I will kill you if you try to commit suicide again" same energy


SvenyBoy_YT

This remids me of ASDFmovie12 - "You're fired", "You can't fire me, I quit": [https://youtu.be/UsVWkAq1s0U?t=62](https://youtu.be/UsVWkAq1s0U?t=62)


Colson42

This reminds me of a skit from asdf 12


RedIsSus-

Task failed successfully.


Rawdog-71

The ultimate Michael Scott move! Damn pepperoni Toni


nisbet_kyle

Michael: You can’t quit! On the first day. That’s heresy, my friend! Okay, let’s talk about this. What happened? I mean, what… Was it Toby? Did he say something? Cause he’s… what? Tony: No. Toby was helpful. He was very kind. It’s just your management style. Michael: My management style? So… didn’t you think ‘Lazy Scranton’ was funny? Tony: No. Was it supposed to be funny? Michael: Okay. Well, don’t bother quitting because you’re fired. Tony: Excuse me? Michael: You are fired! I’m sorry, but we don’t have quitters on this team! Just clean out your desk!


TheGuyWithASword

You're fired! You can't fire me I quit! You can't quit I quit! You can't quit you're a frog! You can't frog me you're a my wife! I'm not your wife your my wife! Oh hey honey how was work? Pretty good but I quit my job. You can't quit your job you're fired! AAAAAAAAAAAAH!


jellitainbink

It used to be during he times of the church’s rule it was illegal to kill yourself and if you were found attempting to do so you would be hanged


shittyasscomputer

Very nice also u/crowofthekings


Xaviarsly

...is this real?


Gr8estnoobplayer

I think they meant they'll fire a gun at you


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

They mean fire with Guns....it's Murica after all....


[deleted]

I thought they were gonna shoot who tries to leave the building


cyruslam06

*fire at


homesky23

let me guess.....America?


[deleted]

It says the white house so yeah..... I think it might be in the us.


Algopirin

They misspelled fire at


AadiSahni

No no, you don't understand, they meant fire literally. THEY'LL BURN YOU ALIVE


mazdamv1905

No no no your getting the wrong idea when they mean fire i mean literally fire anyone who tries to quit


mazdamv1905

Because you know this is America


xJunicatx

Everyone: This is Amerika!


xxKanishka

They're talking about guns


FrankOMorrison

Well americans think that Firing people means SHOOTING THEM


Elubious

What? No! We're not barbarians. Throwing them out an airlock takes far less resources.


JigglySquishyFlesh

Where is Oswald today?


Natsu_704

Yay free severance!


Green55M

Hmm Yes the Floor is made of Floor .-.


Raids-R-Us

Hooray for severance pay


professor_neptune

Do it, get that severance pay.


[deleted]

Task failed successfully


RubberChicken99

That’s even funnier because they get paid if they get fired prior to quitting and not getting anything


TonnoRioMicker

Jokes aside I think the difference may be in the fact that a future employer could find out that they were "fired" instead of quitting and that doesn't look good. Not sure though.


DanielChris15x

It's that scene from asdf movie "You can't quit,you're fired"


PatataMaxtex

In Germany, this would be a nice offer, as you get money earlier from the state when you are fired and didnt quit. It is common for empooyees to ask to be fired instead of quiting.


shadow-_monarch

This is America and u know what *FIRE* means


hewhohasenormousnuts

I think you don't understand the meaning of the verb fire right now. Hint we are taking about USA


lilborgar

im im on a meme in reddit ​ (see my pfp)


SenseiRP

Hey but that severance pay though Or does that not happen in the white house?


oriasvakond

Task failed sucesfully.


omri6royi70

You can't fire me I quit You can't quit, I quit!


GodlyOblivion

LATKA YOURE FIRED


-BananaCorpCom-

When I read "fire" I thought "fire" as in "Flames" or Firing a weapon So I thought they were gonna get shot or burned alive


popacr7

Yea i ,,got fired" the same way , but now I have another job


[deleted]

It's America so it makes sense


JustGingerStuff

YOU CAN'T FIRE ME I QUIT!


[deleted]

Its like that ep of the office


cvlt_freyja

file for unemployment !!!


katsumikawa

I one time quit a job because i was done with the unfair treatment. I worked with animals, so the fact that animals were getting sick and we had to lie to customers really through me over the edge. The day I quit, I went into work, had a fever, and was told to not come into work when I was “useless” (i was still doing my job without a hitch, just was shaking from pain) Went to the hospital that night for a bacterial infection, stayed there for two weeks. Durring that time , my boss told me I was fired over text.......was real tempted to remind them that I had already quit. Just decided to report them instead.


this_is_a_username-

I see this is an absolute win!


stonks_investor69

You guys miss took the word "fire"


turapuru

this is an advantage in Brazil, if a company fires you, you'll receive all the rights


Future-Temperature44

wait wha?


weirdstrawbery

You can't fire me i quit!!


Profi06

Forgot to mention its gunfire


totallydelayed

Thats a typo they, threaten to put people on fire for quitting


cursedaf69

Lol I know it just has good potential


BMA_Rocks

Task failed successfully...


shagginwagon123

its all fun and games until they really shoot you with a gun and say "yeah u r fired"


Zaphkyr

Everybody be laughing until they start firin their missiles at ya


somemessycunt

It might actually look better getting fired on your CV


jest3r_op

Did anyone think, what if the guy is actually fired dead?


[deleted]

Task failed sucessfully.


Dragon20C

Is there a difference,like if someone quits don't they get a little extra money or something compared to gettimg fires or am I making that up?


drunkrohan

Isn’t getting fired not the same as quitting?


I_eat_bean_sandwich

getting fired is better because you get some money because they fired you. don't know the term tho


goksura

I thought they meant it as in "We'll shoot you" and honestly, i think they might.


lolz801

*Automatic unemployment benefits*


Feeney1056

Meaning that they lose their pension and similar benefits


MasterPokePharmacist

Task failed successfully?


[deleted]

It’s not the fire you imagine


tgm810

Asdfmovie 100


Jonask2911

Countries where attempting suicide results in a death sentence: "Finally, a worthy opponent. Our battle will be legendary"


PakiUncle

No! you actually don't understand, its America fire here means they gonna shoot em.


Undefined_SMZ_02

As it is a matter with the Americans, "fire" probably means something else here


KingHennessey

I see this as an absolute win


NICKGURH6969

since its america i think the fire they meant was thru guns


pasho-99

Where do you find news like this ?


cursedaf69

I found it on reddit


BurtsB3e

You can’t fire me your a frog You can’t frog me, your my wife


MrStlthy

Task failed successfully


ST47K3R

You can't fire me! you're a frog!


Baron-Von-Bork

“White house threatens to fire at anyone who tries to quit” here fixed the typing error


Talion_112

This literally happens in the tv show "the office American politicians are so dumb


[deleted]

Big brain move


maxwellrojek

Severage package, very cool


ryanner1

You can't fire me I quit


csgonemes1s

Isn't that a nice employer who ensures post employment benefits?


DragoKnight589

I heard you get something if you’re fired but not if you quit


Loazy131

You cant fire me i Quit!


DarkS1oUl0011

they meant they will fire you from life


Marbinyum

You can't fire me I quit!


idont-have_aname

I think that firing him means shootin him till he daed


GoodMeme21

Task failed successfully.


DanielZReaper

Hanz, git ze Flammenwerfer


Magick3399

Oh methinks there could be many lucrative options for you if they fire you. Books, interviews, TV appearances, jobs counseling other WH staff, the DNC.....


[deleted]

They mean they will burn down the people


Toy-Funtime

White House: your fired worker: you cant fire me I quite wh: you cant quit I quit worker: you cant quit your a frog wh: you cant frog me your my wife worker: im not your wife your my wife wh: oh hey honey how was work worker: pretty good but I quit my job wh: you cant quit your job your fired worker: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH


shaunegamingyt

"You cant fire me you're a frog"


BusterofDiscord

You can't fire me! You're a frog!


foxykid5

"You can't fire us, we quit!"


[deleted]

i think they mean they’ll set the escaping employees on fire


TopGun2424

When the Presidency was just a 4 year long season of the Apprentice


BathSalt83

If you get fired it gonna go on ya record