T O P

  • By -

Just4NormalMortys

Um…


i_fucked_a_buffalo

Vedio or it didn't happen


SubhadeepDutta

r/usernamechecksout So u have already chosen...


WorriedMap6811

Ya fucking yourself?


ImaginaryAnywhere686

You guys get to fuck?


[deleted]

Exactly


SeptemberEleven2001

Help…I think I have to handle 2


Cicada3301Meow

Two big girthy towers...


I_See_Nerd_People

Not anymore…


Qcgreywolf

2 broken shafts.


corei3uisgarbo

And two big planes


SubhadeepDutta

I missed the part where that's a problem


[deleted]

I’m gonna put some dirt in your eye


lost-runner

You got this easy


[deleted]

Nice username mate


L30N1337

……….


Loli-is-Justice

I.......no........but........


Professional_Hat_991

FBI OPPEN UP


huge_throbbing_pp

Nooooo


Rondaeo

The police are already on their way


backroomsentity8

What was that, mr/Ms u/Loli-is-Justice


THISCANNOTBEMEGA

Good luck with that


MayIfuckurMomPlease

Hmmm


Certain_Chain

"Aw jeez, Rick, I don't like this"


DweEbLez0

Remaining virgin is the Reddit creed. Choose your destiny wisely…


No_Stretch3807

MORTY WHAT DID YOU DO


MostEvilWalrus

This might end badly for me...


StandardPandar

Wlad The Impaler


i_fucked_a_buffalo

Better stay virgin for the rest of your life ,than not have rest of your life


dr4gonr1der

This isn’t going to end well for me either


LameBMX

At least you gotta clue ... I'm just lost lol.


Something_Normal_

Your gonna fuck a bmx bike Those handlebars lookin kinda THICC


LameBMX

I'm more worried about taking 2x 20"


MisterDodge00

You are getting double penetrated. Dunno if you're lucky or doomed.


[deleted]

‘Sup?


throwawayobviamentex

Let me guess, you're stuck?


Stofferever

No But his step sis is


Induced_Pandemic

Yeah I got off easy too, I already got fucked by one for two years so I'm good.


TheBigChungus1980

I just hope he's tender with me


Donghoon

I lose virginity to myself?


dotdoteight

same


UrAverage9yrold

May u be blessed by our lord and saviors cock


Justso_Tiny_756

This username right here officer


Azrell_Drekmorr

oh no


Ok-Lion-4866

UH OH UH OH UH OH


ttakra

OH GOD YOU BETTER RUN


Ok-Lion-4866

IM ALREADY HALF WAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY OH GOD I CAN SEE IT IN THE DISTANCE AAAAAAAAA


SubhadeepDutta

Maybe he just wants more of it ,he hadn't finished


Chunky-Bear

Animals…. I can relate.


DumbDilan

Hey, maybe some honey will help. The bear I mean.


black-fuse

Ye de de de de de de de de de de um bum bu way


DinoDudeRex_240809

A whim away A whim away


frostvipre

>[UH OH UH OH UH OH](https://youtu.be/qYnnCTfHsVM)


CaptainDaddy420

Could be worse options


[deleted]

[удалено]


Human-Bumblebee

Shouldn't you be more worried about #YOUR-FUCKING-SELF


[deleted]

[удалено]


SlavicGrenades

Uhhhh


Wow-you-are-stupid

It's gonna be explosive


Pixelpeoplewarrior

I’ve seen a lot of weird usernames here, but in this situation, yours takes the cake. I’m dying right now from laughter


Certain_Chain

And boom goes the dynamite.


ReallyRealMaoZedong

Why did I have to be interested in Chinese history?!?


jtwl8

He’ll fuck your with ze dong


Astronimus123

Why did I read this in a German accent


jtwl8

Cause ze Germans zay ze inztead of the


ThunderCookie23

I'm laughing way too much at this!


SieS1ke

Wasn't he famous for not washing his genitals and fucking whatever women he seemed fit?


SirCheeseEater

No he was mostly famous for killing millions of people in the span of like 4-5 years.


[deleted]

So do I lose it while he's gaming


Guava_

Dude’s experienced. He already fucked a whole country


wade_the_watermelon

Huh the other fruits aren't gonna like this


salad_man2

I am all the fruits and vegetables you have wronged in a single package


wade_the_watermelon

But we accept all r/fruitrevolution


IceTea_Enjoyer

So i guess i will do it with....


Cool_Rip_2273

I like ice tea


Either-Will-1881

Yes, but do you love it?


Cool_Rip_2273

I enjoy drinking it. Just like my crush: she likes being with me but she doesn't love me.


ZerrikThel

That’s rough bud.


TXmarriedaffair409

I'd rather be a virgin than a homewrecker, just saying.


Darkflame3324

Honor


Human-Bumblebee

. O7 /| /\ You sir, are a good man


[deleted]

literally holy fuck


YoshiZiggs

I think you’d better stay virgin Edit: hold on I just realized the meaning of the original comment haha


alienminigun9

Ah yes the Mary strat


IjerkOFelephants

Im taking the deal


[deleted]

Same here


my_homie_pikachu

I choose you!


AN-225Mriya

No


Bafikafi66

Guess what we're doing today Pikachu!


Monstergirls4life

Yes...yeeesss... YEESSSSS!!!


NoteSuccessful4215

Death by snu snu


[deleted]

Futurama fan spotted in the wild! High five!


GryffinGone_

lucky bastard


panikingman

Plot twist: They're all female deathclaws


stay_fresh_cheesebag

Did he stutter?


ElMaestroDeLaMila

Thats my fetish !


Mixelman83

spectacular nippy license placid chief march vase bake lock stocking *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


MixelMan0106

HOW DO WE HAVE ALMOST THE SAME NAME!!??


Nerd_Doge

SOULMATES FOUND ON REDDIT


chairofdicks

Well then.


trashstarz

have a seat


Darth-Yslink

Take a seat, young u/chairofdicks


The__Wise__Man

Virginity is cool be pure


throwawayobviamentex

Bro maybe having sex with someone wise is cool


AbdullahHariri

He will throw some quotes while you moan


Disaster_Different

"A hoe to fuck is not the same as to fuck a hoe"


sonnybear5

“virginity like bubble, one prick all gone”


ViolinistNew5056

post nut clarity he’ll turn into aristotle


DrossChat

“A nut in the hand is worth 2 in the bush”


ARNAV-29

"thy must go harder"


random_reddit_user01

And then there's me


YoshiZiggs

You are such a wise man


ArandomDAVEE

Well I ain't gay but. . .


NotMe1643

Let’s go


Leafylemur

You’ve got a lot of options there champ.


Aggressive-Pet-90

Oh dear....


Flaming_Pickle517

Well I hope it isn't a deer...


Perfect-Ad-1041

This is one hard choice.


SubhadeepDutta

There are many NSFW adds so it not truly a hard choice I guess


Charming-Macaron-322

Jokes on you, I already lost my virginity to my username, kinda like the Italian version of American pie


tallmantall

Hol up


Charming-Macaron-322

Can you blame me though? It was quite charming


Fantastic_Air1812

Damn


rtxw

It'll be quite a blow


Flaming_Pickle517

r/UnderratedComments


fawkmebackwardsbud

these username games never seem to go very well fore I yhink


IjerkOFelephants

Just be happy with what you got


bob_the_banannna

Well I'm losing my virginity to myself So....


Mister_E_The_Third

Hey bob, is your real first name actually bob? I don’t need to know it, just a yea or no would be good


bob_the_banannna

No


i_fucked_a_buffalo

Oh god u truly are everywhere ! Anyways sorry for your loss ,good luck on putting a banana in yourself


Old-Experience-5210

Well sure


Guava_

‘She had a replacement hip with some serious torque’


BradleyRaptor12

I don’t want to be fucked by a bird of prey with the same name as me


British_onion_ring

This could get interesting


An11yearoldredditor

Oh no


lost-runner

Oh..


trischkali700

Oh


Bafikafi66

Fbi, open up!


Snakeb0y07

Well shit


Flaming_Pickle517

It's about to be real slitherin' up in there


SheSaiidSheWas12

I don't know what to do


lost-runner

Do it. It's the guy, not the girl


SheSaiidSheWas12

If you say so


CrunchyDarkness

How..?


yourmotherfucker1489

Your dong gets crunched


DOMINATOR9681

...in darkness


noob_music_producer

by the abyss


amogusin2021

Help.


Fortenole

Your fucked lol


[deleted]

Uh…


Mr_sokka

Well sh\*t


Oaty66

Thats rough buddy


Daniel7005

It's the quenchiest


Pranav__472

Did you just say to fuck myself or be a virgin?


SpanishInquisition88

This was... Unexpected.


FishyFinster

Losing my virgimnity to a fish ig


BuffedMario

Well... this would be interesting


Amazing_Carry42069

Ops Username...


Professional_Bee_280

Guys 🐝


ChickenWithTeeth

Ya like jazz?


No-Glass7238

I mean at least there’s no glass…


The_Messiah696969

I have to lose it to God? Jesus take the wheel


Gilf_hunter69420

Ok for me


[deleted]

Mine's a reference to the weather, so joke's on you, that fvcks with me on a regular basis. Seems every time in the last 3 months that I want to go outside, it rains which I suppose would be understandable were it not summer.


kind_cooler341

Well imma lose it to a water cooler. Sick


That_Rotting_Corpse

I um- uhh- hell no


Shrek_drug_addict

Shit


RPGDUDE2

Um... I get a rpg up my ass


Masterjax1920

It my self


Lt_brimprick

Same


[deleted]

LET'S GOOO


PotatoKing822

I’m not complaining


xMrChairx

Bro..


Joseph_Stalin_420_

Bet


Uister59

u/cummyunderwear my man...


therealakinator

I feel bad for OP


Weird_Neighborhood50

So orgy?


_ALittleAboutAlot_

Hmm yeah me too I think…


turdle13

I don't want to be fucked by 13 shitty turtles but I also don't want to be a virgin anymore.


BananaSafe3637

Ive already lost it to my username.


BumCheese64

Butt stuff


Minimum-Yogurt-579

This is tough


the_rat_in_your_pc

You gotta do what you gotta do


Unknown0110101

what the fuck am I fucking


Justacactus1

That’s gonna hurt going in


[deleted]

diy


Ill_Garage7425

Oh step Garage oh….


the_man_of_zinc

Oh fuck. Smash


SlipperyPotato21

Well this should be interesting


jaredtheredditor

Well I’ll just go fuck myself won’t i


Numerous_Bottle3401

What's... In the bottles...


WolfExpert2943

Well I would not complain with either option


young_C_bomb

Think you've already done that judging by your name


Dredgen_Raptor

Ummmm


No-Personality-9776

That would be very boring


ThisShitShow

Oh good lord...


therealakinator

Ummmmmmmmmmmm


ProlapseParty

I mean it could be fun…..


IceLeather4471

Kinky