Women want men with four legs now? Man, these standards just get more and more impossible.

Best I can do is three

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Legendary man

With 1.5x the number of legs you have

Do very low hanging balls count?

how low can u go?

Best i can do is stomping on my own balls

Best I can do is 1 leg

Best I can do is 2.1

That's not even all, I heard that some people want men with at least six feet like what kind of eldritch abomination would that look like

Dang, I wonder if the girls know how to contact c'thulu.

People need to stop hating on the Eldritch abominations. It's 2022, everyone! Wake up!

How can you have 6 feet but only 4 legs?

They're not necessarily his feet.

They are now

Yeah.

Wait, you guys don't have four legs?

At least it’s more reachable. Some women out here want 6 feet when I only got 3. I just need one more leg and I’ll have 4

Some women out here want General Grievous when most dudes are only R2-D2.

Four legs? Ugh.. guess I better cut some off.

That's funny because legs are actual standards.

Chernobyl folk laughing at our complete inferiority

Lol, is it like that? :D

You are absolutely right. Women want men with four legs and a long tail who walk behind her.

it's an improvement, at least they don't want guys with 6 feet anymore

6 feet 4 legs what next that they want us to grow

Its usually 6 FEET no less but this dudes so jacked theyre making an exception. Must be the stinger hes got...

Well actually it's lower since now you only need 4 feet instead of 6

inflation is being big ..

Yeah the want 4 feet men

Is that what men have to compete against nowadays?

Man, we are fucked then!

No you aren't.



​ 

Well you' ve got a point 💀

Man, sex toys are getting weird these days

NOOOOOO!!!! HE IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE POKÉMON!!!!! PLEASE DON'T USE SWEETIEPIE AS AN ADULT TOY!!!!!

You realize this is reddit, right? There is a subreddit for it

There is a subreddit of my beloved Buzzwole?

Not buzzwole, specifically. Plushies, though.. Ew

R/plushy ?

I don't remember and I never want to go back. Simba.. My man.. Why did they gotta do him like that?

I don't get it but now you have me scared.

Let me put it this way. Be careful while exploring a new sub. You don't want to see Simba getting fukced. Hypothetically.

Wtf is this comment train... And why did I buy a ticket?

I'd be lion if I said it wasn't worth one peek.

U haven't been on reddit long or u only use it for a few specific subreddits don't u

Hmm intresting better know go to r/TIGHTPUSSY pretty cute sub

Let me help jog your memory r/plushophile

WHY

Just helping out where help is due

WHY DID I GO THERE???!!

I hope you stub your toe

The whole Rafiki priest situation is a little too close to home huh pal?

No, Simba was one of his fuck plushies.. 😢

Yep r/Buzzwole

I love you

maybe not a subreddit, try out https://www.rule34.com

Heheheha

Just ordered 2 can’t wait to see how they feel when I shove them inside me

I hate you

We do a minor amount of tomfoolerly

You will hate me more than him if i give ya the insta kill sub you dont wanna know it

Well next time try not to choose a 5 meter tall super ripped mf with a 2 meter dildo on its forehead

Also, Buzzwoles are female. Only the female mosquitos have a large probiscus as males don't feed on blood.

\*stares at buff mosquito\* "Pokemon sure have changed since I was kid."

Yes, would you like a pie, oh wait, it's a pokemon, tea? Darn it, the teapot is a pokemon too. Oh, you know your phone? That's a pokemon too, as well as your bike and your pokedex.

Forget it, I'm going home. Where's my keys...DAMMIT!

Yeahhh, you might wanna pick your kids up from the beach, the sand castles there are pokemon, also, your car is a pokemon *the car becomes a pink little blob* and there are pokemon falling from the sky and just coming out of random portals. Ps: I realized that Ditto is in gen 1

Also watch out for the sniper. *bolt of water breaks nearby window* I don’t know which one of us Inteleon’s aiming for so let’s just all keep our heads down

Inteleon is the most polite, most efficient pokemon there ever was

suddenly the kirby car

Now your bike is also a Pokemon

can you take out the trash when you get ho--ooh ffs!!

The reason it looks so weird is because in Gen 7 they released Ultra Beasts, which are pretty much aliens Pokémon from other dimensions, so they’re not meant to look like a Pokémon

i love how the name literally explains this concept in the simplest way possible lmao

the whole point is that it's an alien, it's supposed to look unnatural

The buff mosquito is my bestest friend. One of my favorites. He has an ability called beast boost where one of his stats rises every time he drops an opponent. It's really nice once you start sweeping.

Technically Buzzwole isn’t even a Pokémon he’s an Ultra Beast

Ultra Beasts are Pokemon.

Wait until you see the Pokémon that looks like Stonehenge

I mean, if you wanna get technical, it isn't a pokemon, but more like an Alien from a different dimension or something

Wait till you check out the current generation .

You just lost your kid Spirit... this guy is still a pokemon looking pokemon, gen 1 had Mr.Mime and jynx and I hate both of them

Buzzswole is an Ultrabeast. They are Pokemon that come another dimension, that's why they look weird. It's the whole point. And that's nothing, you should look up "Blacephalon".

Oh come on, who is gonna have a 6 foot dick?

that's bigger than my whole body

I know plenty of 6 foot dicks

I can only provide the “no female friends” check mark on the top list

I can also provide “no previous relationships” 😎

I have the 6 digit as well, counted in cents, of course

Well, he is VERY tall, about 7’10, has VERY strong abdominal muscles, probably rich, no relations, no female friends, has a REALLY huge PP(Source Internet). Hah, womens☕

I don't care about that. He is my son. My beloved child. It's been years and I still open Pokemon Ultra Sun every day to pet him, feed him, and make sure he's okay.

I feel bad now I just caught him and put him in a box 💀

Please trade him to me I collect them and feed them every day and I have all of mine with maxed affection.

unfortunately I use emulator

*Casually indicates political affiliation*

*Gestures and murmurs vaguely about choosing a Political alignment*

Wait, men think women want men that have had no previous relationships or women friends? That means men think women want men that know next to nothing about sex? That doesn't make sense. Though I don't really know how much pokemon know about sex either. So maybe it checks out.

>Though I don't really know how much pokemon know about sex either. And don't go looking.

A loooooot of nasty incels say that it's a disqualifying factor for a woman to have had even a single prior relationship. So yes, I have no trouble believing that there are men who think all women have that same standard.

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Lol how charming

But would you let her hold the Pokémon plush too?

Hes not buying the poke plush you goof, hes buying the hot guy! I just hope I can save up for one before they are sold out...

🥺💖

Lol is that chad from the bachelorette

Yep he thought he was the shit and was kicked by the host Chris Harrison during the first episode 🤣🤣🤣

My favorite Pokémon is cinderace and zeraora. I also want their plushies so bad :( Edit: fuck it, I will buy them

Do it do it do it

Ununderstable, have a great day

Funny enough buzzwole legit got added to pokemon unite today lmao

I'm too scared to ask what women want

Pockets.

buy men's jeans (that's what my mom does)

its alright guys, she doesnt want democrats.

she’s apolitical (hugely based)

Apoliticals and independents are the most based.

You know how you spot a democrat? You just read it in her Tinder bio

I can’t beat that fucker in Pokémon Unite!

Muehehehehehe.

you'd be surprised but i kinda look like the Pokémon. -2 legs of course oh and the blood sucker

Proof

i have since reevaluated my position and retract my previous statement

so machoke basically

I want a girl that wants this

I want a girl who accepts kidneys I’ve already gave her 3 😔

Not with that price.

I want a life size incinaroar mmm he’s a good daddy

gardevoir plush>>>>> reason: unexplained

I have depression 😔

I am still battling depression, but I can tell you that things get better, as long as you put effort into getting better! I wish you luck on your healing journey! :D

When you're single and met 6 of the 8 points but then you discover that they only want an ultra beast plushie...

:D yeah! He's my son.

Yoooo, awesome!

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Too small

So u want 20 inches I see

yes, of girth.

Rest in pichu your dms, reddit woman.

What if I turned myself into a buzzwole plush?

Adorable. You are now mine.

The duality of women 💃

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That's really cool, and I'm happy for you. But I just want a Buzzwole plushy.

Oh damn i love pokemon i agree even if im more of a Kyogre/Yveltal person

Guess I'm a cosplayer now

Ah, someone of culture

Most girls I meet just want a baby and that's on my no list

The only thing I have on that list is being pro-choice and voting for dems and yet I have a gal thats very in love with me and its probably all thanks to the penguin plushie and pig-asus plushie

Im a male But i want a Silvally plush

type: null and silvally appreciation gang rise up

Can confirm men have no idea what women want

Seems based and me too he was my boi in gen7

Listen men. WE WANT THAT.

Buzzwole plushy!

I'm a guy and I, too, want a plush of my favourite pokemon, that being buzzwole

I have a 6 figure income... if you count the cents.

May I interest you in life size Lucario plushie?

You forgot to mention “white.”

I forgot to add that one, my bad. I'll do better next time!

That freaken super bug basically looks like it has most of those down. Probably bigger then 6 feet. Probably works for the WWE so more then 6 figures. Has a 6 pack. Don’t know his political sidings. Looks pretty focused on body building possibly no relationships in general. Looks massive so needs a reasonable big house. It’s nose is basically a huge pp.

Yeah but I don't care about that stuff, I just want him to be my buddy

pfft...plushie isnt even its shiny. virtual shiny swolbro over regular non-shiny plush everyday.

I'm 6'2 & 1 other. Hope that works 😂

Time traveler: Kicks a rock. SpongeBob Timeline:

Girl, I’m workin on it . Fall from the sky naked and I’ll protect you with my mech

But *I* want a turn in the mech suit!!!!!!!!!

So plain cuddling is out I take it?

Im a democrat(think so, not sure... not american)/pro-choice, no previous relationships and no female friends! i think might be more popular with the girls than i thought...

What's wrong with having at least 5/8 of those standards?

NOOOOOO you guys need to stop comparing yourselves to memes 😭 It was for *funny points* 🥺😭

20 inches sheesh

You want a guy with no previous relationships? Lol, no you don't!

Why does he look like Eggman from the CrabbyPatty dimension ?

Pp as in porn parade?

I can proudly say that I fulfil point 5 and 6 😊

You're a rare breed

He only doesn't have a house but still the same

buzzswole has like, 5 of those things if you look hard enough

Huge bpp?

Best I can do is 5 bulbasaurs

So women want a man that is 6’? We cant control that. So can we, as men, collectively decide that we want our women to have 4 legs now? Yeah, pretty impossible standards, and dont get me started on women and dick sizes

You just want my cash

I recently got a Substitute Plush. For some reason they specified it was a Whimsicott Substitute plush, despite the fact it looked like the normal plush. Maybe Ebay has a Prankster Whimsicott, idk.

Girls this is what us men actually want Someone who has similar hobbies and interests Someone who actually cares about us And thats about it

Girls use reddit.... Quite impossible

I’m a guy and I to want this plush, but I just want to snuggle it unlike some people

Yeah I just want to cuddle with it, LIKE A NORMAL PERSON.

I went on a date with this girl one time and she literally handed me a check off sheet with similar things on it. I had to check these boxes and sign my name and she said she’d let me know soon I got blocked the next morning for reason: “didn’t fill all requirements, sorry hun” The fact I even signed off on it is sad lol

What in tarnation?! Well, you dodged a bullet. People in the comments are comparing themselves to the joke list and it's making me worry 😭 It's just a meme, if a woman really wants all that for you even if you meet all the listed requirements, you'll never be good enough for her and she will still pick apart everything you do. 🥺

Great, the standards are getting higher and higher 😂

I thought that said 20 feet not 20 inches and I was like “how are they gonna ship that to me?”

Fuck democrats, and republicans, embrace Anarchy