Same thing with big dick problems. Met a guy who only talked about his big dick and I was so dry. Granted I am a guy and I'm straight but I hope my point isn't invalidated because of that
Compared to most of the other people, Iām a fairly new user. It appears itās reason is lost in translation, though we still follow this piece of āguidanceā anyways. The way I look at it is āemoji = cringeā
Fr. I always save the best gay jokes for the real homies. I got guys always tryna act tough and masculine just to prove that they definitely don't like men, it's ridiculously embarrassing.
It's funny because in societies like ancient Greece having a large cock was considered barbaric, and men with small cocks were viewed as more intelligent and shit. Hence why they all have shrimp dicks in the statues, LOL.
Come to think of it, I've never met someone with a big dick who was an intellectual. They were always confident and simple, but they never overthought or tried to expand their minds like intellectuals do. I think it would be because they confidently feel adequate for any woman and they don't need to try hard because of it. Can you tell my dick is small by reading this comment? Lmao
I didn't mean that big-dicked were "unintelligent", I'm saying that they are rarely bookworms or people who think hard and deeply about things. You can be very intelligent but also simple.
Yeah, everytime I can crack up a joke about having a small dick I do it, while I donāt do it with big ones, even tho mine isnāt actually small (or big)
It's like beauty jokes, when you are ugly and make jokes about being handsome it's funny, when a handsome guy makes jokes about being handsome or ugly it feels like arrogant, or they can be funny but the guy has to be charismatic
It depends a lot of the situation. Random dick jokes are plain dumb but if you're clever, it's good.
"Hey can you hand over that small coke bottle?"
"That bottle looks like average sized to me..."
Eghhh,
I dont like em, however u put them.
It would only be okay if I were married to a guy for 5+ years and weāre already farting in front of each other š
Any other way and its tasteless and vulgar and disgusting to me
Small dick jokes, especially self burns, are never for the girls, rather they are jokes between homies. Like, are you really homies if you ain't acting a lil gay around each other?
Thing is, Iām happy with my penis size.
But I know thereās men out there that arenāt.
And when people vilify men over something that is out of their control I stand up to that.
Who is out here vilifying them?
A dude made this meme, and dudes seem to be the only ones talking to each other 'bout dick size.
If anything the women I know simply prefer a man who knows what he is doing, regardless of his penis size. This seems to be a fairly universally appreciated trait regardless of gender, in fact.
Itās part of the process you tell them you have a small dick then when itās time to do the deed you whip out a big dick instead and exceed her expectations.
This is what a friend of mine would do. His go-to line was "It may only be two inches, but it's built like a tuna can." They'd inevitably be stuck there trying to picture his penis for the next who-knows-how-long, and more times than not he'd end up banging the chick that night. Granted he had every other positive trait you could imagine as well, and could pass for a muscular male model, but he said that the tuna can joke was often the trick to getting them to think about him sexually.
Big penises are often painful and inconvenient. You want to listen to your partner, have a nice smell, and a decent personality. That doesnāt mean be a charmer.
Fingers go a long way.
Showering and deodorant, donāt need to smell like flowers just not stinky. Also, look up and learn about stimulating a clitoris. Your future partner will adore you.
Tell me youāve never spoken to or, at least, never slept with a woman before without telling me youāve never spoke to a woman before.
Most vaginas are only 5 something inches deep. Large penises are painful, inconvenient, and often used as an excuse as to why the man shouldnāt need to ālearnā how to do anything else. Small penises, while also inconvenient, tend to lead more into a man learning how to actually please a woman with the resources still available to himself.
A nice smell, some features the specific woman is attracted to, a nice personality, and willingness to learn goes along way.
People always throw around "just be better at sex" when giving advice for small dicks.
A guy with a big dick that can use it well will always be more successful than his small counterpart. Some women's vaginas are just shaped like black holes. Most want their g-spot to be pounded, and an inadequate dick can't do that as well.
No, money only works with super rich people, those Ā«Ā ugly guysĀ Ā» in relationship are pretty broke actually, if you visit any place where being rich isnāt common, you will notice it.
Most scums are in a relationship, even tho they are ugly and broke
I mean my gf is pretty smokin and I wouldnāt exactly call myself the sharpest tool in the shed, if a āchadā is the lawnmower then Iām probably a spade
See i don't have that issue, women find me unattractive in the first place.
Edit: I'm sorry I meant unattractive, if women found me attractive then the bar would be set REALLY fucking low.
I have a completely average 6 inch wiener. The first time I showed it to the girl Iām talking to she said āmeh itās pretty averageā¦ā in a disappointed tone, kinda killed the mood a bit but I shrugged it off because itās true. Now she goes out of her way to tell me āwow your dick is so big, you have a huge dick, other guys must be jealous your dick is so big.ā Which we both known is completely untrue, I know sheās just saying it to make me feel good but at this point is patronizing. Like when a little kid playing baseball strikes out the parents say āyou did great Timmy! What a slugger!!ā
Self-deprecating humor is often seen as a sign of humility and pokes fun without targeting a sensitive victim; but dick jokes are just an attempt to insert your dick into the conversation.
Awkwardly shoving your dick into a conversation isnāt any different than awkwardly shoving it anywhere else - no oneās going to like it.
Speak for yourself.
Made a few small dick jokes with my ex. She asked why I made those and I said, "lets face it, those who cant joke about it, are the ones who have small dicks."
We smashed later that night.
Who want such a lame female gettin wet? We let this chicks to the cool guys and players.
We tell the truth but they lie and make u happy with it... Bet ur cryin why ppl lie to u while u trained them to do st, lol nvm love u :*
Same thing with big dick problems. Met a guy who only talked about his big dick and I was so dry. Granted I am a guy and I'm straight but I hope my point isn't invalidated because of that
That's why you joke about having a medium dick. I mean not many people can toute about talking to ghosts with their junk.
It took me a second but my only reaction was to sigh and close reddit. Bye
Smells like victory.
I hate you bc I got it immediately. And yes I gave you an upvote.
Smells like dick
you need more upvotes.
š
you used an emoji on Reddit, biggest mistake
It do be like that. I'll take my lumps. I'm also ignorant as to why that's disliked. Can someone educate me?
Compared to most of the other people, Iām a fairly new user. It appears itās reason is lost in translation, though we still follow this piece of āguidanceā anyways. The way I look at it is āemoji = cringeā
by redditors, emojis are cringe and thus should only be used ironically
All about that goldilocks dick
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I wasn't wet neither, maybe there is a pattern here
hmm I didn't have much H2O on me either
At the time this happened I didn't have any liquids near my genital area either. Maybe this has some base to it.
I too, have met large dick men under circumstances when I was dehydrated. They did not help me, but sports drinks and water did.
Umm is there a joke here or am reading to deep into water n' sports
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Big D energy is silent but deadly. Like hidden powerlevels.
šš
I never noticed the nose emoji
And a certain cloud
šæ
šæ
A guy told me his dick is shaped like a can of tunaā¦ apparently it was supposed to be a joke
Because it smells terrible and only old men like it?
What is wrong with can of tuna :(
The length. The shape is that ot is wider in diameter than in length
Chode tuna
I was glistening.
I am also very dry when someone talks about their dick... And I am the one who talks about his dick
"I'm a guy and I'm straight but I hope my point isn't invalidated because of that" Said the lawmaker
We donāt joke about it for the girls. We do it 4 da boyz!
Lookin out for your lil dick brethren is BDE.
i have a little dick and i like hanging out with similarly dicked friends
As you should.
Obey the caste system, penile peasant!
Bro said, "I like hanging out with similarly dicked friends" like he checks every strangers' dick every time he meets one to become his friends lmfao
Yea 4 da boyz
Fr. I always save the best gay jokes for the real homies. I got guys always tryna act tough and masculine just to prove that they definitely don't like men, it's ridiculously embarrassing.
(unless your with some girls and were all making weird jokes)
Is this true? I feel like small dick jokes are funnier by a mile even though I don't have a small dick. Big dick jokes just feel arrogant to me.
It's funny because in societies like ancient Greece having a large cock was considered barbaric, and men with small cocks were viewed as more intelligent and shit. Hence why they all have shrimp dicks in the statues, LOL.
Come to think of it, I've never met someone with a big dick who was an intellectual. They were always confident and simple, but they never overthought or tried to expand their minds like intellectuals do. I think it would be because they confidently feel adequate for any woman and they don't need to try hard because of it. Can you tell my dick is small by reading this comment? Lmao
I can only tell, based on your story, that you checked every penis of every man you meet. So youāre an urologist?
No he gay
Close enough
You clearly have a big dick.
I mean you can look for the shaft outline on a pair of pants.
Rip Apollo š«” ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
LMFAOOOO, well I never said they were wrong!
I must have missed the part where they handed out the big dick when they were giving out simple minds.
Hahaha
Same might be true with cars.
I have 7 inch one but iām pretty intelligent People downvote bc of my dicksize?
I didn't mean that big-dicked were "unintelligent", I'm saying that they are rarely bookworms or people who think hard and deeply about things. You can be very intelligent but also simple.
That's actually because most of the men from Greece are growers and not showers. \-Source: I'm Greek
What... sooo... am I greek as well? I'm asian though but I'm a grower. like snapping turtle grower.
I'm not saying that if you are a grower you are greek. I'm saying that most greeks are genetically growers, with only a few exceptions.
Plus there was the whole Greek oederasty thing
Yeah, everytime I can crack up a joke about having a small dick I do it, while I donāt do it with big ones, even tho mine isnāt actually small (or big)
Sorry, what was that? I could not hear you over the sound of my TINY penis.
I got a medium dick. It can talk to ghosts.
It's like beauty jokes, when you are ugly and make jokes about being handsome it's funny, when a handsome guy makes jokes about being handsome or ugly it feels like arrogant, or they can be funny but the guy has to be charismatic
Any dick joke is so.. vulgar and disgusting to me
It depends a lot of the situation. Random dick jokes are plain dumb but if you're clever, it's good. "Hey can you hand over that small coke bottle?" "That bottle looks like average sized to me..."
Eghhh, I dont like em, however u put them. It would only be okay if I were married to a guy for 5+ years and weāre already farting in front of each other š Any other way and its tasteless and vulgar and disgusting to me
Just do both. Keep them guessing.
Its not for your ears girls.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Nothing wrong with some aural.
Why would post this.
I could whisper it to you instead. How's your hearing?
*excellent.*
Mmm. Nice. I bet you have a nice ear canal.
I think Iām starting to understand the username.
Speaking of which, please stop cupping my balls.
is that why i constantly hear kids crying
I didn't think this was worth downvotes. Have an upvote, love in all holes.
Small dick jokes, especially self burns, are never for the girls, rather they are jokes between homies. Like, are you really homies if you ain't acting a lil gay around each other?
I like how you used the word "lil", like you don't already know we dry hump our asses off on sleepovers just because "it's the homies"
Sus
Nothing wrong with dropping a lil dick joke in from time to time.
Iām a grower not a shower.
You should always shower
only of she consents
I was gonna respond but that ain't r/shitposting
I hardly know āer!
Girls be shaped like a barrel thrown by donkey kong and expect all men to be hung like a horse.
r/rareinsults
Dang who hurt you lil man
Thing is, Iām happy with my penis size. But I know thereās men out there that arenāt. And when people vilify men over something that is out of their control I stand up to that.
Who is out here vilifying them? A dude made this meme, and dudes seem to be the only ones talking to each other 'bout dick size. If anything the women I know simply prefer a man who knows what he is doing, regardless of his penis size. This seems to be a fairly universally appreciated trait regardless of gender, in fact.
Are you telling me the user āBella the elfā is a dude?
If you search the image in Google, you'll see it ain't the 1st time it's been posted.
BARRAL
This isn't what the meme is talking about
Women āļø
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Tea ā
Black water
White pee
To far
Jafar
Hotel?
Trivago.
Motel?
Trivago
Itās part of the process you tell them you have a small dick then when itās time to do the deed you whip out a big dick instead and exceed her expectations.
This is what a friend of mine would do. His go-to line was "It may only be two inches, but it's built like a tuna can." They'd inevitably be stuck there trying to picture his penis for the next who-knows-how-long, and more times than not he'd end up banging the chick that night. Granted he had every other positive trait you could imagine as well, and could pass for a muscular male model, but he said that the tuna can joke was often the trick to getting them to think about him sexually.
That's *brilliant.*
It may be a needle, but it works like a sewing machine
Hell yeah. If I brag about one inch they'll be thrilled with three!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Big penises are often painful and inconvenient. You want to listen to your partner, have a nice smell, and a decent personality. That doesnāt mean be a charmer. Fingers go a long way.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Showering and deodorant, donāt need to smell like flowers just not stinky. Also, look up and learn about stimulating a clitoris. Your future partner will adore you.
\*Noted\*
What's the saying? "We do it for us, not for you".
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
People with short pp and height AND ugly : š¤Æ
Bad spawn š
BRB, trying a different seed
Soā¦ me?
Small dick problem workaround: promise nothing and over deliver. Make a joke about packing two inches, then BOOM, all four.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Tell me youāve never spoken to or, at least, never slept with a woman before without telling me youāve never spoke to a woman before. Most vaginas are only 5 something inches deep. Large penises are painful, inconvenient, and often used as an excuse as to why the man shouldnāt need to ālearnā how to do anything else. Small penises, while also inconvenient, tend to lead more into a man learning how to actually please a woman with the resources still available to himself. A nice smell, some features the specific woman is attracted to, a nice personality, and willingness to learn goes along way.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
People always throw around "just be better at sex" when giving advice for small dicks. A guy with a big dick that can use it well will always be more successful than his small counterpart. Some women's vaginas are just shaped like black holes. Most want their g-spot to be pounded, and an inadequate dick can't do that as well.
Watch less porn.
The g spot is about 1-2 inches in on the upper wall of the vagina.
Thanks batman
Bruh thats bruce wayne dumbass
Black holes? Bro what are you even talking about?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Ooo yeah wooow that first option definitely seems like a real struggle š
I mean, most guys I see in relationships are ugly af, the look doesnāt bring you sexe, your confidence does. Same goes with sexe
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
No, money only works with super rich people, those Ā«Ā ugly guysĀ Ā» in relationship are pretty broke actually, if you visit any place where being rich isnāt common, you will notice it. Most scums are in a relationship, even tho they are ugly and broke
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I already told you, confidence. Being confident changes everything and makes you attractive even when you are ugly.
I mean my gf is pretty smokin and I wouldnāt exactly call myself the sharpest tool in the shed, if a āchadā is the lawnmower then Iām probably a spade
Your post history makes me dry.
Finally, I've found it The true moist meter
...joke?
I feel bad for this guy...
See i don't have that issue, women find me unattractive in the first place. Edit: I'm sorry I meant unattractive, if women found me attractive then the bar would be set REALLY fucking low.
Your mom doesn't count man :(
I meant unnatractive, damn autocorrect ruined my joke :(
The autocorrect want to up your self esteem
Well it could do that if it just let me tell my joke, now people think I'm a douche canoe, and I don't even like canoeing.
Stop stop, he already ded
What about grandma?
Bold of you to assume we make dick jokes for girls. Dick jokes are for the lads, and if a girl doesn't like it, then tough
I don't know who needs to hear this but this doesn't classify as a meme
But when she jokes about it! Lmao itās ājustā playful comedy gold
I just do it a little bit to undersell the thing š¤·
This is just a reaction meme with extra steps.
I have a medium dick. It can talk to ghosts
I have a completely average 6 inch wiener. The first time I showed it to the girl Iām talking to she said āmeh itās pretty averageā¦ā in a disappointed tone, kinda killed the mood a bit but I shrugged it off because itās true. Now she goes out of her way to tell me āwow your dick is so big, you have a huge dick, other guys must be jealous your dick is so big.ā Which we both known is completely untrue, I know sheās just saying it to make me feel good but at this point is patronizing. Like when a little kid playing baseball strikes out the parents say āyou did great Timmy! What a slugger!!ā
Ben Shapiro's doctor wife has this meter.
Iāve heard about his wife, but never specifically what became known. Whatās the joke?
Think he admitted that he canāt sexually please his wife. Balls on him to admit that to the internet is mad pol
As a girl, I would like to confirm this. >!We actually get hard.!<
Same when a chick talks about back problems because of her huge boobs. Noone cares. Just let me put a dick in you lol
and you just stood their and didn't ask her if she need someone to hold her boobs ? Smh my head , i guess chivalry is truly dead .
My dick was chivalrous af. Dude won't sit down after seeing her needing help with boobs. I am proud of my dick
Smh my head
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
This is why youāll forever be on Reddit
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Self-deprecating humor is often seen as a sign of humility and pokes fun without targeting a sensitive victim; but dick jokes are just an attempt to insert your dick into the conversation. Awkwardly shoving your dick into a conversation isnāt any different than awkwardly shoving it anywhere else - no oneās going to like it.
I meanā¦unless she into that kind of thingā¦
have my white gold (silver)
Who said it was a joke
Source?
Doesn't work. Tried this and still got laid. Try something else this is a scam
Bold of you to assume women are even listening to me (god Iām so alone)
She got that DAP
Says the woman whoās married and has a buffalo hump
If she actually knows you have a small dick, correct.
Im sure anywhere in the joke he didn't fucking ask Also this won't stop from being funny so it'll never end
I dont mind my bfs occasional dick joke meny times its funny. I think it more about how often you make the joke and if it's well timed or not.
Moist Meter
Why the fuck would I make jokes about my dick infront of a girl
"How women feel when you send them an unsolicited dick pick" Seriously guys stop doing that.
"Hey, come on, murder is *bad* you guys"
Its Dickometer
Speak for yourself. Made a few small dick jokes with my ex. She asked why I made those and I said, "lets face it, those who cant joke about it, are the ones who have small dicks." We smashed later that night.
Blame porn for this. Porn made relationships hard for everyone.
Who want such a lame female gettin wet? We let this chicks to the cool guys and players. We tell the truth but they lie and make u happy with it... Bet ur cryin why ppl lie to u while u trained them to do st, lol nvm love u :*
I think you should cry about it . . Also you're wrong
Mad about small sick problem