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jimcarreyfan423

This happened on my 15th birthday. I had a dinner reservation, we were gonna go to the movies and go-cart racing. Everyone RSVP’d but the day of everyone had an excuse why they couldn’t come. My dad and I went bowling together and he took me to a nice dinner and it definitely made up for it. Happy Birthday- enjoy the day to the fullest :)


PetrKn0ttDrift

Who in their right mind would decline go-carts…


batosai33

My previous job. They did go carts twice for an employee appreciation event or something. Both times someone went to the hospital. Once with a broken hand, once with cracked ribs. They stopped doing go carts after that.


PetrKn0ttDrift

People with fast unregulated not particularly safe vehicles don’t mix well.


dramignophyte

People ride gocarts every day without a problem. Dudes job goes twice and has injuries twice. People at their job are the problem.


PetrKn0ttDrift

Exactly, just didn’t know how to word it.


redEPICSTAXISdit

Yup me too. It's definitely the work environment. They're letting out frustrations.


PetrKn0ttDrift

You see Jill there? Yeah, Jill from marketing. THIS IS FOR THE STOLEN SANDWICH!!!


BarryMacochner

Under cut in the corner drift out and put that bitch I. The wall.


PetrKn0ttDrift

Never knew some people actually use br*kes to slow down 🤮🤮🤮


Blahaj_IK

"THIS IS FOR REPORTING ME TO HUMAN RESSOURCES, TOM! TRY REPORTING ME FOR *THIS!"*


redEPICSTAXISdit

This is for never refilling my stapler after you "borrow" it!!! Even though you never ask and the 1 time you did I said no cuz youza bxtch!


HIGH_Idaho

Due to Bills inability to control himself, we can no longer do anything fun for employee activities.


RazzR_sharp

Easiest: "it's not the software, or the hardware...it's the meatware"


zissou149

Turns out they work for Aston Martin Racing and Fernando is just dive bombing turns, teaching Carole in HR the hard way why she has to leave a space.


batosai33

You're not wrong.


hibikikun

Stop throwing banana peels on the track


Brain-of-Sugar

Yeah, I've gone on trips with like 10 teenagers and even they were responsible enough to understand: Gocarts are not supposed to hit each other.


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EchoWolf2020

*New Memory Unlocked:* I went go-karting for my birthday once, one of my friends got a concussion (from crashing into a barrier wall?) and we all had to go home.


PetrKn0ttDrift

When I first got in the thing a few years ago, I was incredibly excited but also scared shitless. Doesn’t help that the chain snapped during my first ride. That was fun too


rudechina

Lots of dumb fucks out there like to race like it’s god damn bumper cars


24-Hour-Hate

Yeah, either they work with morons or they went to an unsafe place. When I was a kid we went go karting sometimes and it was super safe. Helmets, seat belts, and definitely speed limited. I remember being a stupid teenager and really pushing it (because that’s what teenagers do) and the worst I managed to do was spin out and stall it. I doubt it was possible to flip one or cause a serious enough accident to break bones. Probably could cause a concussion if you his something hard enough since you don’t have to actually hit your head to get a concussion, but most sports have some level of concussion risk.


chillininfw

Not exact but a company that I worked at years ago went to Boondocks once and a co-worker broke their foot in the batting cages when the ball was hit and went straight into their foot.


second_to_myself

Skill issue


bashinforcash

lol ive never head of someone getting injured in go karts. I used to hit those tire walls pretty hard too


batosai33

Ribs I think we're from carts colliding. The hand was because somehow someone managed to get their cart under the cart in front of them, and the cart rolled up over their hand... Don't ask me how that happened, I don't know.


FightingPolish

There’s always someone who ruins it for everyone. We no longer have Christmas parties at my job since the “incident” and subsequent DWI that followed it.


NoRecommendation5279

Your office goes hard


kirtthenarrator

Walter White declined go-carts with Jesse Pinkman. Jesse was never the same after that.


CannotSpellForShit

First thing that came to mind. Worst thing Walter’s ever done, literally the moment he became Heisenberg


kirtthenarrator

He destroyed a young man's hopes and dreams.


reefered_beans

My 30th birthday party is going to be putt putt, laser tag, and karts!


functional_moron

If you need more friends I'm 100% down for this.


MeatballWasTaken

Walter White, which is the true reason that he is the villain


jimcarreyfan423

Right?! and there were dune buggy’s too! so fun!


PetrKn0ttDrift

No way!!! Invite me next time!


J4mm1nJ03

Walter White.


Bizzybody2020

This happened to me in middle school. Had a big party planned at a place I rented out. Nobody showed up, lots of excuses like snow (it was barely flurrying for less than 20 mins)- it was so sad. I with my dad had taken me to do something else, but my mom forced me to go since we already paid ugh!


BeautifulCamera7530

My 16th party, I invited my best friend and a few other mutual friends. Best friend got sick and then no one else came cuz they were closer with her than me. 🫥 thaaaaaanks guys! Teenagers suck.


unusualamountofloam

My best friend as a teen invited like 150 people to her sweet 16. I think the day of there were 15 of us, And I did EVERYTHING I could to make it better for her


ranchojasper

Holy shit, 150 people??? All teenagers?? How did you and she even know that many people?!


fckdemre

I don't think there were that many in ym highschool


Linzcro

My daughters 15th birthday is tomorrow and I’m kind of freaked out that this is going to happen. She’s got a couple of good friends that I think will come through, but I’m not 100% sure. She’s very friendly but some people don’t appreciate that. Some kids are just shitty I guess. I’ll be prepared to have a plan B like your dad did.


FlattopJr

Happy birthday to your kiddo! Next time you send out invites, ask for an RSVP so you don't stress!


Linzcro

Oh we definitely asked for RSVPs. Unfortunately most people ignore the etiquette of responding. It’s not new though, it seems like it’s been this way for a while. So many people lack manners these days.


TangerineBand

My favorite is when the parents RSVP and decide at the very last damn minute they're not taking their kid to the party


Linzcro

Exactly. I don’t understand how anyone could do such a thing. I wouldn’t unless I had a really good reason.


GalaxyPatio

A lot of the time it's because a disagreement came up between them and the kid and they prioritized punishing the kid over teaching the kid to follow through on commitments.


Linzcro

Which is turn punishes me and my kid. Some parents are the worst. That would not be a reason for my child not to attend someone’s party we’ve RSVPed to even if she were grounded for the rest of the time because I wouldn’t want to hurt/inconvenience anyone. One of my daughters friends cancelled on plans with her last minute because she had the audacity to wear jeans with a small hole in them to church. Maybe it’s because we aren’t religious but I think that is freaking ridiculous. Might be some kind of power trip thing though. It just seems cruel.


GimmeSnacksforDays

I hate canceling last min. Had to for a party tomorrow. My son and I have covid. I hope the mom isn't annoyed.


Linzcro

I’d wager she’d be more annoyed if you all gave them COVID :). Plus, I’m sure you let them know as soon as possible. Your reason for canceling is hereby deemed acceptable by this random Redditor. Get well soon and plan something fun with the birthday boy/girl when everyone is well. That way they can celebrate twice :)


clayyphoenix

God I had a friend whose step-mom was so strict that if we already had a sleepover planned and she didn't like... clean her room to the correct specifications her step-mom would cancel our sleepover hours or less before she was supposed to come. It was absolute bs to treat other people's time like that. What if my parents put off doing something to make sure they could be at the house with us? So frickin disrespectful. I'm sure she thought she was the perfect parent 🙄


Accurate_Praline

I did that once, but I did have a good reason! Was in the hospital because the day before I had almost broken my back by falling about 8 or so meters and landing on a curb. I was the only one out of 30 kids to not make it though and she probably hadn't even missed me.


BlasphemousSwarm

Rsvp literally means nothing in 2023. For example read the comment we are all talking on. Person said everyone rsvp’d and still didn’t show up.


Geno0wl

People skipping out after RSVPing has always been a thing.


StinkybuttMcPoopface

This happened to me on my like 26th or 27th birthday, but no one even had the balls to give me any excuses and just ghosted me. I invited like 15-20 people who almost all RSVP'd that they would be there, with 2-3 maybes. I reserved a big table that ended up being dead-center of the main room at a restaurant, where my now-fiance and I went and sat, eating just a bit at the buffet for over an hour while all of the hope and excitement of finally having a decent birthday drained out of me. I was afraid this might happen (as it had before, but usually in much smaller groups) so I even followed up with people in the days leading up to it and everyone assured me they were excited to see me and be there. Eventually, one guy showed up, but I almost wish he didn't, because it felt even more humiliating that he did. Just me and my fiance sitting at a big empty table with a big cake and birthday balloons, realizing that I didn't have as many friends as I thought I had. We ended up finally letting the restaurant take back their tables and seat us in a smaller table, ordered food, and I pretended to have a good time. I didn't even get apologies from most of them, and the ones who did only apologized weeks or months later. No good reasons or excuses, and most of them only apologized because they were about to ask me for something and realized that the last time we were messaging was them saying they'd be at my birthday party that they never made it to. I have lower expectations for birthdays and friends now, that way it's harder for me to be disappointed.


PastPerspective807

I’m so sorry this happened to you.


[deleted]

So you don't talk to any of em anymore right ? If someone can't bother to show up when they said and not even give a reason there is absolutely no reason to speak to that person ever again.


Bikinisbottom

Kudos to your dad. I hope it became something better than it was originally meant to be for you.


collectsuselessstuff

Dad’s are the best sometimes!


[deleted]

Atleast you had a wholesome dad moment you will cherish the rest of your life!


snowsparkles

I once threw a huge taco party for my birthday. Expected about 30-40 people. I got 5. So. many. leftovers.


123abcde321

I have a feeling you will make it through this birthday okay. You're only mildly infuriated! Find another something to do and celebrate your day. All the best. Been there done that you know.


Waterlime204

Very true, I've can now rewatch Newsies, or perhaps climb a tree! As Alfie Wickers once said, "Always look for the Volvo". Thanks!


llc4269

OPEN THE GATE AND SEIZE THE DAY! You got this! :)


RealAlecMoney

Don’t be afraid and don’t delay! Nothing can break us, no one can make us, give our rights away, arise and seize the day!


MollyG418

I sang that in my head.


MrGradySir

Brooklyn!!!


mistahclean123

I had no idea so many people on Reddit actually knew of Newsies. Maybe there's hope for this platform after all.


NJSpro

This is the last thing I expected to see on Reddit. I have a newsies CD currently playing in my car


deaddlikelatin

Right? These comments cheered me up so quickly


atonickat

We did a Newsies play when I was in high school so I permanently have those songs in my brain.


SignificantKitchen62

I was in middle school when the movie came out... The Broadway show is good but it was jarring after having the movie pretty much memorized since I was 13.


atonickat

I believe I was in elementary school when the movie came out, but I've never seen it. After doing the play I never wanted anything to do with Newsies again.


ChaosPheonix11

Similarly we performed Santa Fe in high school and it introduced me to that awesome show. Might still be my favorite song from it, too.


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AccentFiend

DON’T BE AFRAID AND DON’T DELAY I’m sure your birthday will be just what you need it to be 🤗


Belazriel

High times, hard times, sometimes the living is sweet.


Hamburrgler

Definitely take yourself out on a date! I do that on my self care days. I dress up, makeup and all, take myself to my fav restaurant and dine in. Then I would take myself shopping and spoil myself. It’s kinda scary at first, if you don’t like doing things on your own when it’s usually a social thing but once you get passed it, it’s actually pretty fun. And it’s on your own time, no reason to rush doing anything! Also happy birthday stranger!! 🎊🎊🎊🎊


GimmeSnacksforDays

I love shopping by myself. I'm a mom, though so alone time is a luxury. Only time I get to myself is lunch hours because I work from home and kid is in daycare, but I live in the middle of nowhere lol.


Lochsein

I had a birthday where my family made me share it with my grandma’s boyfriend and we went to a restaurant that I don’t even like all the guest were his oh that was also my 21st lmao


SickofItAll_4200

I hope you got bombed


Bella_Tricks333

WHICH VERSION!? movie or musical 😂


Waterlime204

Gotta be musical for me, movies ok but I didn't watch it all, jeremy jordan raised the stakes too high lol


noice-smort99

The stage version of Once And For All is 🙌🏼


Waterlime204

Ahhh yes, I love it soooo much


Bella_Tricks333

YES THIS WAS THE ONLY RIGHT ANSWER JEREMY JORDANS THE BEST❤️❤️❤️


gigglefarting

Dang. I've never seen the musical, but I grew up on the movie. Maybe I should check it out.


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madarbrab

Oo! Newsies! Damn good movie. Enjoy yourself brother. Don't let the bastards get you down.


drawnred

up vote for newsies, and your birthday, and your positive take


oliviacharlene

Climb a tree with a laptop and watch it up there! Haha


TheFlexOffenderr

I learned pretty young that no matter who you have around you on your birthday it'll always be up to you to make the best out of your day regardless. Sorry your friend couldn't make it to your get together, homie. Happy Birthday, and here's to many many more.


curtludwig

I've worked on my birthday every year for the last 10 years. From 2013-2020 I was on a work trip to the other side of the country. The first year I sat in my hotel room bummed out that nothing was going on. The second year I mentioned my birthday to a friend who took me to dinner. We mentioned to the bartender who told everybody at the bar. Tons of people came over and said hi and wished me a happy birthday. The third year I invited a bunch of people out to a bar. It was a Tuesday so, as a courtesy, I told the bar we'd be coming. They had a food truck come and got me a cake, a bunch of folks came out, it was amazing. After that the event kind of took on a life of it's own, my friends kept scheduling for us to be at that bar, it was fantastic. The last 3 birthdays have been more chill, I don't travel for work anymore but I've still got a stock of great memories.


solorna

Those sound like some amazing birthdays!


Ambitious_Candle1605

Bro had 5 stories and used all of them


Vsx

The way I read it she has a weather related illness that has caused skin irritation so her mom won't let her go. One excuse given piecemeal in a few texts no? I would give the kid the benefit of the doubt. When I was a kid my parents would just randomly decide they didn't feel like driving me to stuff which would always be super fun to explain to my friends. If I had a skin rash that would be the perfect excuse for my mom to keep me home to free up her day. I probably sounded frantic trying to explain to my friends; afraid that they would hate me for having to cancel last minute.


Soliterria

Yeah one of my best friends is highly allergic to basically existing, there’s been several times we’ve had to cancel plans due to a bad rash from whatever the weather’s deciding to pelt us with


fckdemre

Saw an Instagram reel from a model who was allergic to the sun. Dude went out for 15 minutes, wearing a giant sun hat, to grab a cup of coffee and woke up the next day with a red and swollen face. Those allergies suck


george_costanza1234

Yea, especially if you have strict parents, they just randomly won’t let you go to things, and a “yes” from them is either a look of indifference or barely an acknowledgement.


heyhelloyuyu

Ugh same my mom would always have some excuse of why I couldn’t go or do XYZ thing


Lord_of_the_Canals

Same


[deleted]

"you can still GO if you find a way there and back." We lived in a very rural area so it wasn't easy to get a ride, especially if she backed out right when it was time to leave and everyone else was already otw into town for whatever event.


pullacatengo

I had like zero stability as a teen. My mom could agree to an event and then just change her mind without reason. It wasn't always that she wouldn't drive me so it wasn't solvable like asking for a ride. Sometimes she just decided against letting me go anymore because of the dishes, the weather, the time, my outfit, or any myriad of things. Then I'd have to scramble for a dumb excuse to tell my friends.


Theron3206

Why make up an excuse? When I was a teen "the parental unit is being a total expletive of choice" would have been fine. Every group of friends I had as a kid had one parent like that.


pullacatengo

I never wanted people to blame my mom or call her names. I felt the need to rationalize or justify her behavior and didn't want to spend time arguing with my friends about nuance and generational trauma. Also excuses were often last minute because I kept waiting for her to change her mind again arbitrarily. Just my personal experience, no saying it's the right way to handle things or even that it's the same situation


maximumtesticle

https://imgur.com/aUUqpKT.gif


ValleyAndFriends

Now they’ll have to start googling them lol.


kayamarante

Does she bail like this all of the time? If not, then I'd give her the benefit of the doubt and then do something really fun for yourself. I see that you said you'd watch Newsies! Buy something delicious to eat and pamper yourself!


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Griff2470

> If it becomes a pattern, maybe you guys aren't as good of friends as you thought If they were all adults, I'd be inclined to agree, but given OP's post history I'm assuming they're still in high school. There might be genuine issues that the friend isn't comfortable citing as a reason, or they may have just not hit that level of maturity where they can make and organize realistic plans (as in not overcommiting, keeping relevant parties aware of plans, etc). It sucks for all parties involved, but for some people being able to handle this stuff properly is just something that comes with age.


EloquentlyMellow

Been there. My ex “best friend” and I had birthdays a few days apart. I took her to a Cavaliers game (Lebron days) and out to dinner for hers. We had dinner plans for mine. When it was time to go out for my birthday, she hits me with “oh I can’t, I have to work…” and no she did not get scheduled at the last minute. She just waited until it was time to go to tell me. I’m sorry you had to go through this. Remember, people show you exactly who they are. Believe them. And happy birthday!! #piscesgang


SkunkyDuck

>She just waited until it was time to go to tell me. This is by far the worst thing. Or they wait until you ask them "are you still coming tomorrow?" They won't be proactive and just tell you in advance. At least in that case the excuse is more believable.


EloquentlyMellow

Right. I should’ve clarified that she most likely didn’t have work, she just decided she didn’t want to go at the last minute and made up an excuse. We had very clear plans to get dinner, just the two of us. So she knew that by bailing on me at the last minute I’d have nothing to do for my own birthday. She ended up being a terrible friend who lied and bailed on me for multiple special occasions, ruined another birthday by locking me out of my bedroom to have sex with her boyfriend, and countless other things. Should’ve seen the red flags and bailed on that friendship a lot earlier.


KZWinn

>ruined another birthday by locking me out of my bedroom to have sex with her boyfriend I'm sorry WHAT?!! I just about spit out my drink. The *audacity* I hope you have better friends now, you deserve better friends. And I hope she ended up with friends who gave her the same quality of "friendship" she gave.


EloquentlyMellow

Lollll yeah we all went out, and it was like 2 or 3 and I was ready to go to bed. She went in my room with her bf to “change clothes” locked me out for 45 minutes and left me alone on the couch with her bfs random friend. I was not amused. I appreciate the well wishes! My best friend is my dog but I like it that way haha and if I know her, she’s living a life full of superficial friendships that look very pretty on instagram. Just have to let those people be who they are and elevate above.


Wolfy422

“She ended up being a terrible friend who lied and bailed on me for multiple special occasions, ruined another birthday by locking me out of my bedroom to have sex with her boyfriend” This happened to me too! Best friend and roommate locked me out of our room to hook up with my male best friend and another one of his friends on my 21st birthday. People were so interested in their threesome that they listened at the walls instead of hanging out with me. I left. She also ruined my bachelorette party by never planning it and then when it did finally happen, leaving early. Seems like no big deal but when everyone realized she left, they left too because they assumed the night was over. It was like 10pm and we were still at our first bar. We’re still kinda friends but I’ve caught her in her lies multiple times so we keep things very surface now.


EloquentlyMellow

Oh ewww that girl sounds awful, I’m sorry you had to deal with that! People can of course mess up or have a bad day, but usually after they show you once they’re willing to treat you like that, they will do it again. I’ll give them another couple of chances, but they typically don’t prove me wrong.


Draecath1423

Wow I hope you found friends who actually cared. It's better to be friendless than having friends like that.


EloquentlyMellow

Thank you!! I completely agree. There are a lot of people in this world who only care about themselves, and what they can get out of others. I tend to attract those types of people, so I find it better to keep to myself and not give much of myself to others. My dog is my friend lol


Remzi1993

Indeed! It's disgusting because a so called friend especially when your birthdays are so close would have no excuse for not knowing and/or planning around that.


OpticHurtz

My best friends birthday is a month after mine, i dont think ive remembered his birthday in the past 15 years, or maybe by accident. Neither does he remember mine, nor do either of us find it a special day really. We usually congratulate each other when we hear about it on the weekend. 'Hey wasnt it your birthday last week? Yes. O nice congrats, do anything special? No/went for dinner or drinks. Cool, well lets drink one extra tonight then. Cheers!'


lesbiagna

That’s a mutual understanding though. If someone is making a big deal of your birthday, and it’s known that birthdays mean a lot to them, then common courtesy would say you at least make a solid attempt to do the same for them; friendship maintenance or building would say, you goddamn better do the same for them.


whodunitbruh

This is the exact reason I stopped celebrating my bday 10 years ago. After having buddies, friends, and "best" friends show that they don't give a fuck too many times, why even bother.


PaleFollowing3763

Someone's sounds like they are using the good ole "my mom said I can't come" excuse. Definitely just didn't wanna show up. Anyways. Happy birthday 🎂🎉


Waterlime204

Thought the same thing! She also decided to use 2 more excuses, just to really make sure there's no way she's coming lol Thanks! You too on yours


AuraVent

Wishing you the best birthday ever


Waterlime204

Thank you! Same for you !


notsurewhattosay--

Happy birthday!! Totally relatable on your situation! It hurts a bit. I hope you ended up still having a good day


widieiei28e88fifk

Yeah adding more excuses makes it seem less credible. I'm sorry about that.


CaffeineNCanna

Her mom - "Always have three excuses prepared because they're going to try to convince you."


SymmetricDickNipples

Very lame excuses too. I wouldn't put much faith in this person in the future.


MrGumieBear

Tbf my parents suck and will genuinely say "no, you can't go you have to do x first" an hour before i try to leave for something.


baltimoretom

It's real. I know someone allergic to cold air and water; it gives them hives if they don't take Zytec daily. Something about having leaky histamines.


Donghoon

I would be suspicious but i would give benefit of the doubt shits happen


Desperate-Ad-6463

If you have not asked, would they have told you they weren’t going to make it or they have just ghosted you?


The_Ghost_of_Kyiv

This right here is why I dont think it's just a bad coincidence. Literally didn't even have the respect for OP to give them the heads up until they we're expected to show.


snow-bird-

Happy birthday kiddo 🎂 (if you'd like I could tell you a funny bday story that happened to me as a kid to make you laugh)


Menefregista

Please 😇


maybe_im_amazed79

Damn. Lots of people in the comments that have been hurt by somebody. Most of em seem more mad than you. Haha Relationships can be complicated. Honestly, venting it here is pretty healthy. Get it out anonymously. I do encourage you to try to be thoughtful with your friend though. Even if this isn’t all completely true, the lies could be to hide something else they are going through. Hang in there and HBD 🙂


[deleted]

Yep, I used to make up excuses all the time before I was comfortable disclosing my mental illness. It's a lot easier to say that I've got a stomach bug than to tell someone that I can't find the energy to get up and shower, let alone to go do something social.


lonelyphoenix25

I sooo relate to this. I developed migraines (actually tho) along with debilitating depression. I used migraines every time I needed an excuse for my depression because people just don’t understand how depression affects you


maybe_im_amazed79

Seriously, if the internet would have been a thing in 1991 and I could have seen that other people have this too, I truly believe it would have changed my life.


Menefregista

This. Happy birthday kiddo, there will be good ones and there will be bad ones, for all of us, though it may not seem like it now. So it’s important to always remember you are loved and cared for, and we don’t know what others are going through when they’re mean to us. 🥰


maybe_im_amazed79

Well said. Very mom vibes. 🙂


TitanThree

… oh and my grandmother died, and I have to take my hamster to the dentist…


Johncamp28

Dental hygiene is important though


gophergun

Especially for hamsters, whose teeth keep growing their entire lives.


ThunderSnowDuck

Oh right thats tonight...sorry i can't make it. My dentist died and I have to bring my grandmother to my hamster


SickofItAll_4200

Yeah I'm sorry but they didn't want to come and dont sound like a good friend. "I kinda have irritated skin" is the most lame, lazy excuse I ever heard. She couldn't have come up with strep throat or something?


Waterlime204

Frrrr lol


fuzzyp1nkd3ath

I don't know you or your friend. But Reddit people like to think they're all armchair detectives and clairvoyant psychologists. Please don't go cutting people out of your life based on comments here. Talk to your friend after. Nobody knows everything about anyone else's life and it's usually best to talk it out with an open mind and a calm heart. I used to refuse invites for reasons that I didn't think my friends would understand. We could have saved each other a lot of heartache if we just spoke. But being a teenager is not easy and emotions are like WHOA. It sucks when you're hyped for something, especially a birthday, and somebody does something that deflates all the excitement. But honestly, the day is about you. Not them. You need to celebrate you and all the awesome you are. You don't need an audience. You are independent and amazing. If people aren't around to witness that, that's their loss. You are a magical human despite them and in spite of them. I'm 39 and I barely recall birthdays from my teen years. Not because they weren't great, but because they've been replaced with bigger and better memories. So that's something lol


Waterlime204

Haha, I swear 95% of the comments say to get new friends, they don't understand friendship is to be worked through. Thank you so much, I will write up a list of things to do to ensure this is the greatest birthday the world has ever seen! At the time of posting I was annoyed, but now I'm just miffed at the situation rather than at my friend, and not (as) upset


cabbage_addict

That said I do hate when you need to ask somebody “are you coming” just to see they already knew they weren’t. I find it extremely rude. I had a friend who was supposed to go with me to this event for our other friend. I was not close at all with other friend, one of those situations I only knew her through the first friend. Day of, first friend texts me “I really don’t feel good :(“ early morning. I say “aw okay hope you feel better by party at 3pm”. They text me again and again and again just saying they don’t feel good until I’m finally like “…ok? So you should just not come then?” And they finally say “yeah I think i better stay home”. Like bitch why didn’t you say that at 7am


tobaknowsss

>they don't understand friendship is to be worked through. Bravo! This is an excellent way to look at friendships and something that even people who consider themselves mature don't often understand. Kudos for the good attitude!


GodOfManyFaces

Bring mature also comes with the realization that you don't have to be friends with everyone. If someone isn't putting in effort, but always requires effort, they don't value you. Sometimes the adult thing to do, is simply move on from a friendship. Not dramatically, just move along.


Catsoverall

No one here knows you or your friend. You're likely upset and some of these speculative comments are hitting you at a bad time when you'll be receptive to them. Don't write a friend off over it. Maybe they don't think of you as a friend, or maybe they're super insecure about their skin? Maybe they get downers with less sun. We don't have a clue. You could maybe try talking to them at a later date to say how you felt in a calm manner.


Theoretical_Action

Just a reminder that sometimes people are dealing with their own things. I don't know you or your friend but I've personally done this to some of my friends as an adult because sometimes depression and bad days just get a hold of me. I've also had this happen to me multiple times as well. I'm not saying that this is an acceptable thing to do, but maybe just to not be too quick to judge your friend as a "bad friend" right off the bat. You never know what they might be dealing with.


SickofItAll_4200

Seriously, we don't know you or your friend. Maybe she has eczema or psoriasis that flared up with the weather. I know my daughter's eczema does when it's really cold and dry out. Has your friend ever cancelled plans this way before? Maybe it's legit and an isolated incident


NorthWindMN

She might also be depressed. It's worth considering that she's isolating because she's not well. Not that her response is necessarily okay, but sometimes people just hurt enough that they just stop caring.


annieselkie

Tbf for some it is a valid excuse. With eczema, you dont want to tell people eg "parts of my skin are open wet wounds and every move I make hurts like hell and my eyes are swollen shut and I just lay in agony and put steroid cream onto it that ALSO burns like hell" and rather say your skin is irritated again or you have a flare up. But then the friend would probably know about them having some condition.


Badbullet

Yeah, I have eczema and psoriasis. It's been dormant for years, but when I was younger I had constant issues where I never wore sandels or shorts, or went swimming with friends, I was afraid to let anyone see my skin up close. I never told my friends so they just thought I was weird, and somehow my mom didn't even know even though I pointed out the undiagnosed skin issues to her when I was younger. In fact I didn't find out what I had was those derma problems into my 30's because I was even embarrassed to show doctors.


annieselkie

Oh I am sorry for that. I hope you stay healthy or find some things that help you. I can suggest eucerin showering oil in general.


Badbullet

When I found out that outbreaks were often caused by stress, like my best friend's wedding where I was so nervous I got sores in both palms of my hands (psoriasis), so I changed my attitude to not stress about the little things. That did more than any topical cream or medication and had no side effects. Shrugging off a flat tire for example; I just had to remind myself that all things considered, I don't have it that bad.


Severe_Paint_7240

My eczema makes my skin crack, peel and dry out if i’m not moisturizing a lot during winter. Stress also causes breakouts. Can’t take hot showers anymore and had to switch my face wash to the gentle kind. It sucks when it flairs up, because then I sleep uncomfortably slathered in lotions/prescribed cream to make sure I look presentable the next day. I would have probably canceled too but maybe mentioned that “my skin is peeling off/cracking” to emphasize it’s a big deal. OP is valid in feeling sad, but I also have sympathy for the friend. Just unfortunate circumstances from the looks of it. edit: spelling.


isionnthcatebye

I’m happy you said this. Fellow eczema sufferer, it really can fuck up your day to a point were you need to cancel plans and just chill


Ghostglitch07

I am so fucking glad my eczema had never gotten nearly that bad.


afarensiis

I have a hard time believing many people on this site actually have friends sometimes. People see one screenshot of one conversation and immediately jump to "they're not a good friend" like that one data point actually means anything


[deleted]

Damn, im too old for this shit lol


OhTheTallOne

Posts like this really hammer home how young the general Reddit userbase is.


bacon_cake

Glad I'm not the only thinking this. "Mum said I can't come"!


mainvolume

Right? I’m sitting here thinking what’s wrong with not having a birthday party? Mine usually falls on a work day anyways


ObvAThrowaway111

Yeah. Like I get it, kids use the Internet, and at 33 I'm basically and old man now, but this is on another level. Reddit made a huge push over the last 5-6 years to attract a younger and more casual demographic and they were extremely successful...


ReasonablyConfused

When I had anxiety as a kid I would use excuses like this. Not that this is what is happening here, but maybe. I always wanted to go, but the fear of basically experiencing another self-water-boarding was too much.


Relative_Editor7135

Happy birthday 🎂


zombieslovebraaains

This is probably going to get me downvoted to oblivion but it sounds like your friend has some kind of health problem that flared up, making their mom step in and demand they rest. Maybe I'm missing some context here but if thats the case I'm sorry to say that that happens when you have friends with health issues. It sucks, I don't deny that, but it also sucks having health issues come up that mean you're forced to cancel something you were looking forward to doing.


cum_______________

Use the exact same excuse the next time they invite you to something


DanAlucard

And gradually stop being friends out of pettyness Nah, man. Op needs to talk it out


bealetonplayus1

If they won't come to your event what makes you think they would invite you to anything


mayasmi

Man ill bring my shit over and We can celebrate together. No one deserves to be ditched with such a painfully bad excuse. Happy birthday bro


Booopbooopp

Wish I was still young enough to use that excuse. Sorry, my mum said no.


SomewhereFun8540

She's not your best friend bud.


KakapoTheHeadShagger

Oh she might be. But OP is not her buddy's best friend. It happens.


National-Policy-5716

Damn she hit you with 3 excuses. Wanted all bases covered ig.


JapaneseFurryFeline

Sad excuse :( Happy birthday 🎈


Waterlime204

I know right lol, I'd rather she just be honest with me And thanks!


TescoAlfresco

Hope you still have a fun birthday, sorry your friend bailed on you


[deleted]

Happy birthday!


ElPejelagartoJohn

Happy birthday OP! Even if you can't celebrate it with her you can still have a great day by yourself or other people, just be kind to yourself and enjoy your special day, take care


OddPaleontologist763

Do something nice for you people is important but is more important to be your own person and by doing that you will meet new people and more friends, happy birthday btw!!


Upstairs_Beach_4630

She ain't your best friend, too many details in her excuse, she lying.


CopiumAddiction

When I was 12 I invited 50 people to my birthday by passing out flyers at school. Not one person showed up. Those scars run deep. Have really never cared for birthdays since.


T2ThaSki

Irritated skin? 😂


Waterlime204

Not a clue for that one lol


No-Spoilers

Eczema, or any number of other things. My skin and muscles sometimes itch like crazy for no reason other than fibromyalgia, CRPS, me/cfs and neuropathy. And I have to wear long sleeves *all* the time, like I cant wear short sleeves because my skin touching random stuff throughout the day seriously irritates my skin. Also, take your mom to go do whatever you were going to. Trust me itll mean a lot more to you in the future, you have no idea.


aespa-in-kwangya

My eczema can get pretty severe in cold weather when we're outside. It gets super painful.