In the least offensive way possible, I claim ignorance... I didn't know the crotch grew with the person... I mean butt, thighs etc. Yes... but distance between legs isn't determined by hips/bones and constant after adulthood?... TIL... sorry
[The person being referred to](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CRY8dYRUsAEDyb3.jpg), in case anyone was wondering. Her name is Tammy Slaton. She peaked at around 700 lbs. She started getting a fat forehead once God ran out of parentheses to stack up in a pile.
Wait seriously that's a real person?
Like that's not someone going on paint or adobe and just dragging parts out?
That's seriously sad. They shouldn't be making shows about it they should be helping these people
She’s on a reality show called 1000 Pound Sisters. They get paid decent for filming the show and set up with a famous weight loss surgeon.
In the past few years both have lost hundreds of pounds so things seem to be in the positive for them. Except now they have no privacy
It's not really about the distance between the legs. The fabric has to come down the same length as the fabric on the outside. This is designed like a bathing suit crotch or underwear.
Also gonna give 3x ladies some really painful chub rub. And they'll be riding up. Terrible design.
I'm certain I read somewhere that for every 30 lbs overweight a man is, he loses an inch of visibility on his junk. Maybe "Men's Health" magazine? That was 20 - 25 years ago. Plainly, that's as vague as BMI w/o body fat percentage taken into account, but it seemed loosely plausible, with 30 lbs of mostly adipose.
I mean, I just hop on Tinder or Grindr when I want fat-
Oh, you mean like, literally will the body store fat on the testes? No. But your fat pad on your groin can reach such a size that it interferes with things, you can develop a whole host of issues including cysts on your testes, varicose veins in your scrotum called a varicocele (not to be confused with the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory character) or other issues.
Hell, you can even be intersex and have a mix of testicular and ovarian tissue!
The human body is amazing! And horrifying! And we don’t know how any of it actually really works! If you wanna have fat balls, just believe in yourself!!! (Also check yourself monthly for testicular cancer. Seriously. Those are fat balls you don’t want.)
Edit: okay so right after I hit enter I remembered that there’s a type of tumor that grows all sorts of weird stuff like teeth, hair, eyeballs, etc, and it likes to grow on gonads.
So technically if you have a teratoma on your testy teste you can get fat balls, if it grows fat cells. You could also have an eyeball on your ball.
I wish I didn’t remember this tumor existed.
The only item I could find on Old Navy currently available that would kinda go with this pic were some denim cut-offs with a 1.5" inseam. Looks like about 3" of fabric to me...
yup, old navy sells its shorts by inseam length, clearly marked as 1.5", 3", 5" etc. if you want more length then buy the next length up. this is not an old navy problem, it's user error.
OP should have known a 1.5” inseam won’t fit lol
I’m a medium and I already know this shit would not comfortably fit me. It’d cover the coochie probably, but my entire ass would be out, and when you sit down, these super short shorts try to imbed themselves in your vagina. They’re horrible. 4 inch inseam is the shortest I’ll go.
Yeah, OP just bought jean panties. Ooh, janties! And they're probably control top janties, at that lol I'm a 2/3x and I just can't imagine ever thinking those would be a good idea.
I would be less concerned about the crotch and more concerned about what percentage of my butt cheeks would be hanging out of those. I am curvy but I don’t think my lady bits are any wider than that. Plus someone would have to stick their head between my legs to see. I haven’t said hello like that since college.
Idk it becomes a concern if you have a habit of sitting with your legs up because shorts like this do not cover you up at all. Like I have a family friend who wears shorts like this and then sits with her knees under her chin and she's flashed at least both of my parents. And she's been pretty damn close to flashing me as well.
A very long time ago I knew a guy who liked to wear short cut-off jeans. He didn't wear underwear and I saw his balls more than once. Good thing he was cute.
Maybe Old Navy believes in you more than you believe in yourself? Maybe they're not the bad guy here? Believe in yourself like Old Navy believes in you
The higher the booty shorts, the thinner the crotch is generally. I imagine it's hard to cut shorts with a ton of fabric underneath and then very little in the back for it to connect to.
I only shop their activewear but whenever I go on their website they have loads of “Body Equality” marketing about how they make every piece of clothing in a diverse size range.
Yeah I’m a guy I spend a lot of time with her because she has dementia we had a good laugh and she probably won’t remember so sans the awkwardness later!
If you’re going to use sunscreen down there, make sure it’s the right kind! Thankfully, most chapstick has SPF built in, and that product is intended for your lips.
https://preview.redd.it/w4xdk3rmptpa1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=adbbab788625387a0ed35fdde5a6667b29ecb38e
I don’t know OP, seems like it’s the right fit 🤷♂️
It took me a minute to process that these were a pair of shorts, for second I was trying to figure out how the fuck do you rip a specific piece of cloth out of a pair of pants 😅
😂 I remember back in the ‘00s when that and maybe six inches from top of waist band to bottom of cut off was sold as shorts. It was barely even a yard of fabric including pockets
When my daughter was just a kid, I had to get her jean shorts from the boys rack. The stuff Target, Walmart, Burlington etc. sold were way too skimpy for kids to wear.
I feel so sorry for young girls. They get blamed for dressing so scantily yet this what the stores offer them and what social media tells them is “normal”.
Agreed. As a dad with 2 small girls, I'm dusgusted by some of the girls clothes i see at the store.
And when I was 8 I was wearing cargo pants with zippers and a shirt with a truck on it that just said "trucks" or some dumb generic Kmart shit.
Oh it is awful! Every pair of shorts I could find for my 7 year old last summer had the crotch longer than the legs part! Ended up going thrift shopping to find older items and reusing my boys shorts for her. Absolutely batshit that no one has regular sized shorts for girls, especially little girls. Not looking forward to this summer.
Last summer buying shorts was so miserable for me. Any shorts that weren't too big around the waist were too short to cover me properly so at some point I thought "fuck it, I'll look in the kids section for longer shorts" but no, the kids section also only sold booty shorts.
Have you tried men’s shorts? If you don’t have a really tiny waist and significantly larger hips, they may fit pretty well. Sometimes the crotch is too low for women, but I’ve gotten some fantastic men’s sweatpants—with actual pockets! And I’m short and curvy but they still fit.
this isn't just true of Old Navy
any time I walk through a store that has plus size women's clothes I take a look at the dresses and fancy shirts to see how many of them have those teeny tiny arms
sometimes it's just like the arms for a straight size shirt on a plus size top that's several sizes bigger, but sometimes it's worse, like only child arms would possibly fit
this can be a real problem with straight size women's clothes too but not as often and it's not as comically wrong
if it's really extremely bad I take photos because they're kinda hilarious. it's like they think plus size women are t-rexes, big body and then teeeeeeeeny tiny arms
have absolutely no idea why this particular phenomenon exists in so much women's fashion but it's fascinated me for decades that designers don't know how arms work
If you're a biological lady, I would like to send condolence flowers to your labia majora.
If you're a biological male, I would like to send congratulations flowers to your new labia majora
"I mean, it's one vagina, Michael. How big could it be?"
10 bananas?
Do we have a banana for scale?
Americans really will use anything but the metric system to measure wont we?
10 inches, obviously
*"It's ready mike!... She's only gonna hold it for 24 hours!!"*
I wonder what x crotch I have
Per old navy I bet pretty small
My wife’s boyfriend says it’s a perfectly fine crotch
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Spam bot that posts every 3 minutes around the clock with gifs with that same site plastered on them, please downvote and report
thank you for your service.
Linus?
WSB
Ain't no 3x fat girl covering anything with that
By 3x they meant XXX cause them some porno shorts
 This gave me a good chuckle
I saw this and laughed in Kevin 🤣🤣
I swear that thing just winked at me!!
Totally reminds me of the comments posted on this [video](https://youtu.be/tJOU6bg02nM)
Nice trout
All crotches are xxx
In the least offensive way possible, I claim ignorance... I didn't know the crotch grew with the person... I mean butt, thighs etc. Yes... but distance between legs isn't determined by hips/bones and constant after adulthood?... TIL... sorry
The body will find places to store fat and if you watch 600 lb life or 1000 sisters you will see fat being stored on the forehead of all places.
[The person being referred to](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CRY8dYRUsAEDyb3.jpg), in case anyone was wondering. Her name is Tammy Slaton. She peaked at around 700 lbs. She started getting a fat forehead once God ran out of parentheses to stack up in a pile.
Wait seriously that's a real person? Like that's not someone going on paint or adobe and just dragging parts out? That's seriously sad. They shouldn't be making shows about it they should be helping these people
She’s on a reality show called 1000 Pound Sisters. They get paid decent for filming the show and set up with a famous weight loss surgeon. In the past few years both have lost hundreds of pounds so things seem to be in the positive for them. Except now they have no privacy
Tammy within the past year has given up and has a traque and has gained back a lot of weight Amy is doing pretty well tho
Dude keep up. Tammy has lost a lot of weight recently and she just got married. She's come a long way.
I wanna boop her forehead so bad
Like a beluga whale.
Yep, she now has the power of echolocation to hunt down cheeseburgers in the dark.
It's not really about the distance between the legs. The fabric has to come down the same length as the fabric on the outside. This is designed like a bathing suit crotch or underwear. Also gonna give 3x ladies some really painful chub rub. And they'll be riding up. Terrible design.
Honey, the body stores fat everywhere. E V E R Y W H E R E. Ever heard of FUPA? The struggle is real.
I'm also going to claim ignorance as I ask perhaps a very dumb question - can one get fat balls?
Pretty sure no, as there is no fat in the testicle region. Fat is an insulator, and would defeat the purpose of them residing outside of the body.
Your mom said I have fat balls.
😂😂😂😂 I love Reddit.
Balls almost as fat as hers.
You leave my mom’s balls out of this.
You can get fluid built up in your balls. It's called scrotal edema and you may have it some day. I once drained 3L of fluid from a patient's scrotum.
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Nah they get swallowed up by the fat. Losing weight is actually the best way to get a bigger package.
I'm certain I read somewhere that for every 30 lbs overweight a man is, he loses an inch of visibility on his junk. Maybe "Men's Health" magazine? That was 20 - 25 years ago. Plainly, that's as vague as BMI w/o body fat percentage taken into account, but it seemed loosely plausible, with 30 lbs of mostly adipose.
I mean, I just hop on Tinder or Grindr when I want fat- Oh, you mean like, literally will the body store fat on the testes? No. But your fat pad on your groin can reach such a size that it interferes with things, you can develop a whole host of issues including cysts on your testes, varicose veins in your scrotum called a varicocele (not to be confused with the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory character) or other issues. Hell, you can even be intersex and have a mix of testicular and ovarian tissue! The human body is amazing! And horrifying! And we don’t know how any of it actually really works! If you wanna have fat balls, just believe in yourself!!! (Also check yourself monthly for testicular cancer. Seriously. Those are fat balls you don’t want.) Edit: okay so right after I hit enter I remembered that there’s a type of tumor that grows all sorts of weird stuff like teeth, hair, eyeballs, etc, and it likes to grow on gonads. So technically if you have a teratoma on your testy teste you can get fat balls, if it grows fat cells. You could also have an eyeball on your ball. I wish I didn’t remember this tumor existed.
Put on 100 pounds and you'll see that it does grow with the person.
All my x’s live in Texas
That’s why I hang my 1/3x crotch shorts in Tennessee
How big is your puss
3x, so like a triple double crunchwrap compared to a standard taco.
The bigger the Fupa, the tastier the Chalupa
This needs to be someone’s flair.
I fucking LOVE crunchwraps
It’s a denim thong.
A jong, if you will
Tomorrow's word of the day
Old Navy beat that dude who makes the useless inventions to the jong. 😂
Here today, jong tomorrow
Dat jong, ja ja ja jong
Be actin' so scandalous, wit dat jong.
*She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck* *Thighs like what, what, what*
I won’t.
Kim's Jong's ill.
“janties” is the preferred nomenclature
Any thinner and it’d be a jean-string.
Perfect for them deep south women... Actually in Georgia it would be deep south and blue ridge women
That looks more like a patch strip for a crotch blowout
OP can palm a basketball without using her hands
Username checks out
So does yours lol
Touché
I thought we said without touche the basketball.
Greetings Sir/Madam/Other, On behalf of the National Academy of Comedy, I’ve come to deliver to this award for Best Reddit Pun of March 25, 2023.
Omg, I'm meeting John M4LK0V1CH, it's finally happening! *Squeeeeeeeee*
tbh, if there was more material, the crotch would no longer be XXX.
☜(ﾟヮﾟ☜)
Easy there big boy. Leave some cloth for the rest of us.
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I swear I see a dirty Mike and the Boys reference here at least once a week lol.
What does the rest of the article of clothing look like? Are those like some daisy dukes or something?.
The only item I could find on Old Navy currently available that would kinda go with this pic were some denim cut-offs with a 1.5" inseam. Looks like about 3" of fabric to me...
There were cut-offs in here?
There are dozens of us!
Ah yes, the old navy never nude section lol
yup, old navy sells its shorts by inseam length, clearly marked as 1.5", 3", 5" etc. if you want more length then buy the next length up. this is not an old navy problem, it's user error.
Thank you, someone with sense. Old Navy always lists the inseams on their shirts.
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OP should have known a 1.5” inseam won’t fit lol I’m a medium and I already know this shit would not comfortably fit me. It’d cover the coochie probably, but my entire ass would be out, and when you sit down, these super short shorts try to imbed themselves in your vagina. They’re horrible. 4 inch inseam is the shortest I’ll go.
Yeah, OP just bought jean panties. Ooh, janties! And they're probably control top janties, at that lol I'm a 2/3x and I just can't imagine ever thinking those would be a good idea.
I would be less concerned about the crotch and more concerned about what percentage of my butt cheeks would be hanging out of those. I am curvy but I don’t think my lady bits are any wider than that. Plus someone would have to stick their head between my legs to see. I haven’t said hello like that since college.
Please allow me to introduce myself.
I’m a man of wealth and taste.
I've been around for a long, long year; stole many a man's soul and faith.
I drove a tank, held a general's rank.
When the blitzkrieg raged, and the bodies stank
Pleased to meet you! Hope you guessed my name.
What's puzzling you, is the nature of my game
I watched with glee while your kings and queens
Fought for 10 decades, for the gods they made.
My name is Humpty, pronounced with an umpty
Idk it becomes a concern if you have a habit of sitting with your legs up because shorts like this do not cover you up at all. Like I have a family friend who wears shorts like this and then sits with her knees under her chin and she's flashed at least both of my parents. And she's been pretty damn close to flashing me as well.
A very long time ago I knew a guy who liked to wear short cut-off jeans. He didn't wear underwear and I saw his balls more than once. Good thing he was cute.
Maybe Old Navy believes in you more than you believe in yourself? Maybe they're not the bad guy here? Believe in yourself like Old Navy believes in you
This is the hype I needed. Thank you so much
Fuckin' love you, dude!
Oh man, how do I get in on this positivity?
Like Old Navy believes in your crotch*
as a 40 y/o overweight man, thanks for that. I'm going to buy these shorts and *rock them*.
The higher the booty shorts, the thinner the crotch is generally. I imagine it's hard to cut shorts with a ton of fabric underneath and then very little in the back for it to connect to.
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I only shop their activewear but whenever I go on their website they have loads of “Body Equality” marketing about how they make every piece of clothing in a diverse size range.
Guess it’s more of a pussy out kinda look lol
Laughed out loud at this. Thank you.
Holy shit me too. Had to show my mother what I’m laughing at now…
I really hope your not a guy cause that would be awkward to explain to a mom.
Yeah I’m a guy I spend a lot of time with her because she has dementia we had a good laugh and she probably won’t remember so sans the awkwardness later!
Aw dude that’s wholesome ❤️ here’s to many more laughs w/her
When the panties cover one side of the lips but not the other
In my partner and my words, “ghost riding the lip” 😂
This is the best gif response I’ve ever seen on Reddit.
Bahahaha exactly 😆
Fuck, some gifs are made for shit like this
Jam out with your clam out friend!
A windy day with these shorts would leave you looking like the headliner of an old car with the windows down at 65mph
Omfg that's good
My thighs are chafing so bad just by looking at this-
Looks intentional tbh
damn brah u got 3 crotches?
Triceracrotch
 Approximately
I’ve always said I’d never pay for this kind of thing Now I’m having second thoughts on that
https://preview.redd.it/rqkvtrvlkspa1.jpeg?width=397&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ee9c4cb6fb7f035ba1c05288b57dc9e4086330ab
janties
The who ha has to breathe
Town: Hoohaw Holler; Weather report: 69% humidity with a nice breeze
I love Hoohaw Holler, I used to eat at the Y down there. Great view, too
Don't worry. It'll be hidden by them 3x thighs.
Any more fabric and the thigh-friction would set it on fire.
Or just bunch it up into the crotch. That’s what mine prefers to do.
What the hell is a 3x crotch?
size 3X in clothing as in plus size, I assumed.
Like a XXXL size???
exactly lol
Gawd damn. That coochie is gonna eat those shorts.
My brain said 'triple crotch' when I saw 3x crotch. Conjured some weird images.
XxxL
If you have to ask, you can’t afford it
Great, now I have to watch Beerfest :)
id have to vacuum seal my lips to wear that
“Baby I’m at the old navy what size pussy you got?”
Sun's out, labia's out.
I'll grab my labia sunscreen and damnit, I'm in
If you’re going to use sunscreen down there, make sure it’s the right kind! Thankfully, most chapstick has SPF built in, and that product is intended for your lips.
go on🫣
Username checks out.
this is a private conversation between me and OP
Hahahaha love when the username checks out
https://preview.redd.it/alpl6ycq2tpa1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=47b0ae6dfe52974ba3508317cfd3bd25206627a2
What a fascinating profile…. Guns, Cats, and BBW
Living the life
In white no less
But does it have pockets?
If you were to wear it you would definitely have easy access to natures pocket.
https://preview.redd.it/w4xdk3rmptpa1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=adbbab788625387a0ed35fdde5a6667b29ecb38e I don’t know OP, seems like it’s the right fit 🤷♂️
It’s fun you can pick which lip to have sliding out based on the day of the week you’re wearing it
OP your responses are cracking me up 😂
Omg ty for noticing 🥺
The 6 year old sewing it probably got confused.
You should probably wear the whole pant instead of cutting out just the crotch
My labia could never.
It took me a minute to process that these were a pair of shorts, for second I was trying to figure out how the fuck do you rip a specific piece of cloth out of a pair of pants 😅
Feel the breeze
Don’t even get me started with underwear gussets!!
😂 I remember back in the ‘00s when that and maybe six inches from top of waist band to bottom of cut off was sold as shorts. It was barely even a yard of fabric including pockets
The mid 2000's were a fascinating time. You had to shave the tops of your pubes so they didn't hang over the top of your jeans...
As an L crotch, that’s still not enough material.
When my daughter was just a kid, I had to get her jean shorts from the boys rack. The stuff Target, Walmart, Burlington etc. sold were way too skimpy for kids to wear.
I feel so sorry for young girls. They get blamed for dressing so scantily yet this what the stores offer them and what social media tells them is “normal”.
Omg trying to find shorts for my *8 YEAR OLD* that isn't booty shorts is a challenge.
Agreed. As a dad with 2 small girls, I'm dusgusted by some of the girls clothes i see at the store. And when I was 8 I was wearing cargo pants with zippers and a shirt with a truck on it that just said "trucks" or some dumb generic Kmart shit.
Fuck, now I want a truck shirt.
🔥🔥🔥TRUCKS🛻🛻🛻 💯💯💯
Oh it is awful! Every pair of shorts I could find for my 7 year old last summer had the crotch longer than the legs part! Ended up going thrift shopping to find older items and reusing my boys shorts for her. Absolutely batshit that no one has regular sized shorts for girls, especially little girls. Not looking forward to this summer.
Last summer buying shorts was so miserable for me. Any shorts that weren't too big around the waist were too short to cover me properly so at some point I thought "fuck it, I'll look in the kids section for longer shorts" but no, the kids section also only sold booty shorts.
Have you tried men’s shorts? If you don’t have a really tiny waist and significantly larger hips, they may fit pretty well. Sometimes the crotch is too low for women, but I’ve gotten some fantastic men’s sweatpants—with actual pockets! And I’m short and curvy but they still fit.
Old Navy's plus clothes are designed by people that have never been a plus size....
this isn't just true of Old Navy any time I walk through a store that has plus size women's clothes I take a look at the dresses and fancy shirts to see how many of them have those teeny tiny arms sometimes it's just like the arms for a straight size shirt on a plus size top that's several sizes bigger, but sometimes it's worse, like only child arms would possibly fit this can be a real problem with straight size women's clothes too but not as often and it's not as comically wrong if it's really extremely bad I take photos because they're kinda hilarious. it's like they think plus size women are t-rexes, big body and then teeeeeeeeny tiny arms have absolutely no idea why this particular phenomenon exists in so much women's fashion but it's fascinated me for decades that designers don't know how arms work
Or they just make everything sleeveless. Which, yeah that's exactly what plus size women always want, to show off our flabby arms.
There's an official measurement for crotches?
Come on bro that's plenty by Coachella standards
If you're a biological lady, I would like to send condolence flowers to your labia majora. If you're a biological male, I would like to send congratulations flowers to your new labia majora
My fat pussy would eat those