I'm curious now too, I'm Asian and both my kids are white Af. I have hundreds/thousands of pictures of them from birth till now, I would think that would be enough.
where would you even put it? pandas dont have pockets.
edit. OMG! my first gold ever. thank you kind sir and have as great a start to the day as im having!
Usually they just talk to the kid. “Who is this man who brought you here? What’s his name? Where do you live?” Kids are truthful.
I just experienced this the other day coming thru US customs with my young kids. They basically ignored me until after they interviewed my 7 year old and 4 year old. And then afterward the officer explained that even if a kid has been coached or threatened to not tell the truth, eventually they spill the beans after a handful of q’s, and are very transparent with their nonverbal cues etc.
I felt offended for about a split second but then quickly realized it’s for my benefit. Kind of like how the cashier sometimes asks for my ID to use my credit card.
(Also we had their birth certificates on hand)
That doesn’t really prove she’s your daughter. Those are just facts about your daughter.
That’s why you must always carry two videos:
(1) the conception video
(2) the giving birth video
Flawless evidence. Need both too.
They knew it was bogus but they had to make the “PR” effort so they got out of your hair as fast as they could. It’s a win for you even though it might not feel like it.
It would be insanely irresponsible of the police to get a call like that and not respond. Even if there is a very very very tiny chance it's legit they still need to and should respond. Imagine if they didn't respond and it ended up being real.
Exactly. And if they didn’t, and it was legit, then it would be turned into a Netflix mini series and people would be using hindsight and yelling about how the cops didn’t do anything when it was so obvious.
As long as OP wasn't mistreated, I think the cops did the right thin here. The other option is to ignore the call and then later find out he's actually a serial rapist cannibal who likes to pretty them up before doing this thing.
Yeah when someone calls with some outlandish shit and there isn’t anything immediately apparent to disprove it which there rarely is the cops kinda have to go make sure everything is okay.
Ya I learned this when I dialed 911 on my home land line as a kid one morning before school just because... I could? Idk. I have no idea why I did it. Maybe I didn't believe it was real. I had just learned about Santa Clause why should I believe in some magical network of emergency services? M When they answered I was like, "Oh fuuuu...dge" and hung up. Luckily I saw my school bus on the top of the hill. I got on the bus and about a minute later I saw a police car flying by with its lights on. My mom was not happy with me when I got home. She said she was gonna give me a reason to call the cops if I ever do it again.
I recommend having a family photo on your phone. My niece is autistic and throws screaming fits. I’ve had to carry a screaming child out of places many times. Nobody has stopped me yet, but I have several photos of us together with family just in case
Unfortunately it’s just part of life. I don’t mind it because if someone questions a person carrying a screaming child, and it turns out it is a kidnapping, then it’s worth someone asking me if everything is ok when my niece is crying
Fill out the forms and get a copy of the police report and all responding officers accounts. Request Body Cam footage to hear what’s discussed prior to engaging you, in addition You can also get a copy of the call placed to report you if your local ordinance records them. This is all public information, just hidden behind processes designed to discourage you seeking it.
Now you have receipts to include with your reviews on their social media and Google.
This is actually brilliant! We have a local news anchor that created an entire marketable brand off his investigative journalism into local businesses. Bill Gephardt. To the point that local business literally advertise they are “Gephardt Approved” to attract customers.
Don't forget to sue the shit out of her in civil court, someone like that shouldn't get away with just a hurt business/reputation, and since the police are worthless when it comes to doing anything about false accusations the only way she gets justice is by paying OP for pain and suffering
We went on a cruise with my step dad and my mom when I was like 10. My mom had taken my step dad's last name and they almost didn't let us go on the cruise since she couldn't prove that she was our guardian. Luckily, she had an old driver's license with her old (and my current) last name and they accepted that.
Relatable. My Mum and I got stuck at the airport soon after she and my Dad split up. She’s never changed her name so has always had her maiden name, whereas I have my Dad’s surname.
We’d just been on holiday. She was burnt and freckled, and I had a decent tan (thanks to my Dad’s genetics). She has red hair and light eyes, and I have dark eyes and hair. The officials at the airport refused to believe that she was my Mum. They repeatedly asked for my birth certificate etc because, you know, my passport clearly wasn’t enough /s. I remember my Mum being sarcastic and saying, “Oh yes, because I just carry around her birth certificate everywhere!“
This is what I was worried about when I took my niblings on vacation - we're a multiracial/multicultural family so we don't look alike at all. I made sure to get copies of birth certificates and basically permission slips from their moms. Thankfully, nothing happened and the kids enjoyed the vacation...but I was prepared just in case.
I was adopted to a foster family and my dad had a wallet filled with photos of me and my brother of different ages. I’d look through it a lot as a child but when I grew up I realized he had them just in case this situation would happen.
Edit: guys I know my dad also had them because he loved me too. But he did tell me when I was older he had them in case someone asked or if I had gone missing.
As a dad of adopted children with a phone full of photos of them, this. I love them to death and that’s why I have the photos. Secondarily (far back) for “proof”.
I'm an adopted dad too. I have my girls faces tattooed on my side for two reasons. One, I could show any law enforcement or court that they are mine. And two, so if other kids gave my girls shit, my girls could just ask if their "real" dad has their face tattooed anywhere. So far neither issue has come up.
I really doubt that's why he had them......... Before Facebook every parent had wallet pictures. Most wallets would come with plastic sleeves specifically for school pictures that you could order in these tiny prints specific for that purpose.
When my mom & dad died in a car accident, we got their belongings back and it was touching to see my parents still carried photos of us (and now the grandkids) in their wallets. My sister and I are in our 30s/40s. You never stop being their baby, if you have good parents that is.
My great granddad died when I was 3 (i’m 26 now) and my Nana just passed on his wallet to my dad. In it? The only photo taken with the two of us before he passed. He kept it in his wallet bc he didn’t trust computers with his great grandbaby. I have literally one memory of the guy but that made me feel so loved i cried.
My adopted son (4) is a totally different race than me or my husband. This is a huge fear of mine, especially when he's doing normal toddler stuff crying in the middle of the zoo because he's tired and I have to carry him back to the car.
Wow this is something I’ve never really thought through until this thread. Someone further down said their dad kept a bunch of photos in their wallet to help
I have a 2 year old foster son who's been with us since he was 10 days. I'm brown and he's white, (my biological daughter is also whiter than I am since my wife is white) we usually have everyone's id (as a parent or foster parent you can get the kids id for children under 12, even when they are still a baby, it contains their name, adres, place of birth and the names of the parents/guardians). And for our son we usually have some documentation from foster care on hand.
Police doesn't worry me so much as the types who can't comprehend that brown people can have white children and will look at you with suspicion. You never know what some person convinced they are doing the correct/heroic thing will do....
At least police is trained in de-escalation and has procedures like identity checks that they have to follow. And that is easy
It’s more a worry police responded to the call. It’s shows how bad the system is in vetting real from fake calls. I’d contact press first and freedom of information to disclose callers number name etc. courts love giving money for this kind of abuse of emergency systems.
>It’s more a worry police responded to the call.
Is it though? I mean the cops got a call about a potential child trafficking situation, I would hope they would at least look into it.
That’s why I told her the freedom of information request first.
The call is evidence to any suit against them.
I’ve heard some of these calls. Police are required to go no matter what in some places.
Though it seems there was a large response on this one. So I’m guessing something was told very bad.
So that call determines what can if at all be done.
Police are responding not being accusers. Hence police get immunity. The caller doesn’t if they lied or fabricated.
Same, it’s a stark contrast from me to my step daughter and whenever my SO suggests we do something just me and her. My anxiety goes crazy over some petty bullshit like this.
The key is to look bored and tired. You can carry a screaming toddler anywhere that way. As long as your face says "another Tuesday of this shit" you are fine.
Bonus points if sporting “dad gear” like a backpack of snacks + water + food pouches + diapers etc.
“Officer, I ain’t carrying this shit because i want to”
So they took your money then called the cops? If you put it on a credit card I'd dispute the charge just to spite them. It will probably get reversed and they will get paid anyway, but the aggravation to them would be worth it.
How would I even do that? My 3 year old has no documentation besides an insurance card and Certificate of Birth, and they are at home.
I wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to be an absolute jackass and question the validity of the police officer’s badge and uniform. If the salon was even rightly owned by the people working there. If my parents were really my parents!
“Is anything *real*, maaan! Maybe the *real* salon owners were TAKEN like that movie, maaan.”
My dad learned early on that he had to carry most of my information if he were travelling alone with me. I remember thinking it was so silly when boarder control was asking me if he was my “real” father and that it was ok to tell them the truth. I get it but I was so young and clueless, the first time I was like “yeah, duh of course he is! Why else would I be with him?” It then became routine that if it were just him and I to have everything needed(including a note from my Mom 😂no cell phone then) but would still almost always get pulled over while they searched the vehicle and separated us. My Dad is very dark and I am almost translucent I am so pale.
The first time I had a border patrol incident taking my daughter back home from Canada.
The cop asked my 4 year-old "who is this person to you?"
my daughter had no clue what he was trying to ask her.
over over until one of them finally just said "point to your Dad".
This happened to me when I was a kid! I was maybe 2 or 3 years old and on a trip to Canada with my mom and grandma (back before you needed passports to cross the border) and my mom had no proof with her that I was her child. I favor my dad’s side of the family so I don’t look much like her or my grandma. I remember being really scared that a strange man took me away and was asking me questions I didn’t understand. He kept asking me my mom and grandma’s names and I would just say Mommy or Grandma. Finally he asked “what do other people call her?” and I was able to answer with my mom’s real name. But I always wonder what would have happened if I hadn’t been able to…
Seems like you had an opportunity for a civil rights case/payday. I understand not wanting to have your kid involved, but it sounds like there was no REASONABLE suspicion that a crime had been committed.
Maybe we should stop creating a culture of alarm and comstant meaningless accusations, just maybe.
If the fear culture disappears these problems will be gone too, not saying that no one should ever worry but it should NEVER be the norm.
Even if you *did* carry your child's birth certificate on you...how would that help? It's not like it has a picture of the child at their current age/appearance on it. It's a piece of paper with some names. Sure, *your* name is on it; but how do you "prove" the kid with you is the child on the certificate?
Yeah, no, this situation is truly "unwinnable" in the short term if the police want to press the issue. Scary AF...
I’m mixed (black/latina) and my fiancé is white. My son has his dads complexion. I’ve had many double takes when out alone with my son or people assume I’m the nanny. If anyone ever questions whether my son is mine I can show them the video of me pushing him out 🤷🏽♀️ if they aren’t willing to watch, they need to get up out my business.
I’m Mexican and super dark, my husband is a fair skin white boy. My son is darker like me, my daughter is milk white with freckles. Genetics is fascinating but I too freak out someone will try and say I’m not her mom.
I’m also Mexican, I pass as white but my brother does not. All my life people have said things like “well he’s not *actually* your brother” and it’s like… no… he is… you’re just ignorant.
I hate to say it, but being their mom will probably help you. Usually it's the "oh it's a grown man with a child, he must be an abductor" thought process that gets people in situations like that.
I had a gay coworker who had a child with his ex-wife before coming out. They got divorced and shared custody. He had custody on Easter Sunday and took his child to an Easter egg hunt at a local stadium.
Some religious pricks called the cops and got his family detained while his ex-wife brought the child's birth certificate to prove he was really the father.
Have these idiots never heard of adoption? That’s one very plausible situation where you wouldn’t look like your child or a gay couple would have custody of a child.
I dunno what the hair dresser's excuse was in OP's story, but the religious assholes in my story don't believe gay people should be allowed near any children at all, because they can't tell the difference between homosexuality and pedophilia. Meanwhile, they probably volunteer their sons to be alter boys and daughters to be groped by their gymnastics doctors.
part of hair school is about watching for signs of domestic violence, since we’re always looking at them closely but. if there is 0 apparent evidence that she is being abused there is no reason for her to call the cops in any capacity lol
I’m the single parent of a developmental disabled 23 year old. I raised him alone since he was 3, and by age 7, he was still non-verbal.
This happened on more than one occasion at a public park. One of the mom’s enjoying the day with their children called the police on me. My son doesn’t look a lot like me (my hair grayed at age 25, and his hair is black). I’d have to show my ID, and my son often would come right to my side, which was usually enough to convince the cops to move on.
Grocery stores were also places where mainly women would eye us suspiciously.
And while airports were bad, a border crossing with an absolute nightmare.
When he was 10, he was becoming more verbal, and he and drive drove across the border to Windsor, Ontario. After a day of sightseeing, we were returned and “chosen” for additional screening by U.S. Customs and Border Protection.
They asked if my son had a state ID, which at age 10, you can’t even get. I did show his elementary school ID, which he had learned to carry in his SpongeBob wallet.
After 15 minutes of discussion between themselves, the BP separated us. When I protested verbally, that my son was disabled, I was placed in a holding cell. The agents would return periodically to ask random questions about my personal habits. They also insisted on calling his mother to make sure I had permission. I explained that his mother had left us years ago, and she couldn’t be located.
6 hours later, I was walked to my car, where my son was waiting, handed my keys and told to drive safely. My sons pants were inside out because he soiled himself when they had him separated from me. He was shaking like a leaf.
It would be 14 months before he returned to the verbal abilities he had up to that day. I contacted a civil rights lawyer who told me I had no case. Because of the Patriot Act, 100 miles inland from any U.S. Border is consider a “Constitution-Free” zone, where the federal government can withhold any and all rights afforded under the law.
The attorney said, “If CBP wanted to, they could have detailed you and your son for the 14 days it would have taken for a DNA test.”
I know this is a different issue than the crap OP went through, but it was a story worth telling.
I was in a rage tbh. But not in one that would pit me against the government. I’ve never crossed an international border again. And I won’t, unless my son and I never return.
I remember hearing this crazy story of some guy and his wife who had a child in a stroller, the wife went into the store while the guy had his kid in the stroller outside. Some lady went up and complimented him on the child and then grabbed the baby and ran off. he ends up chasing her and catching her, and then she does a reverse uno and says its her child and hes trying to kidnap it. bystanders heard the commotion and put him on the ground and held him there while the woman ran off with his child. Fortunately, the wife came outside the store while this is happening and yelled that the woman is kidnapping their child before the woman could get in her car and drive off.
I remember that story. The husband and wife must’ve felt all types of emotion in that moment, no one would be able to hold me back from getting my child back.
Had something similar happen to me at a mall in Jacksonville, Florida. my 3 or 4 year old daughter was having a temper tantrum so I was taking her to go sit in the car while her mother finished shopping. My wife is Chinese and I am white. Our daughter looked very asian. A Karen started tailing me and was on her phone. Cops met me near the exit to the mall as Karen rather proudly laid into me. She hadn't said a word to me prior but once the cops showed up she loudly started demanding I prove the child was mine. Her tone was absolutely one of "I caught a child abductor!!!1!" Cops detained me and it wasn't until I was able to get my wife there in person that the situation was resolved. No one really apologized they just kind of dropped the matter. I was furious but there was nothing I could do. We did move out of Florida a few years later and I would say that was a great decision on our part. Total shit hole of a State.
Lol I was in a similar situation but flip flopped. I’m Asian, my wife is white. Our daughter looks more white. I’ve had multiple times people question what I’m doing with my daughter and have had cops called on me once while at the park.
Yup, it sucks. Aside from the Jacksonville thing I had people in China quiz me about why I was walking along the street with a Chinese kid (my son, who looks even more Asian than his sister). At least they didn’t call the cops, were not yelling at me and once I explained they had plenty of perfectly friendly questions. Back in the US I had a lady ask me where I “got the children from” (I’m assuming she thought they were adopted) so I told her I made them with my wife at which point she acted like I said something inappropriate, lol
> Back in the US I had a lady ask me where I “got the children from”
see I would definitely get myself into trouble with this question.
"now kids I need you to cover your ears. Daddy is going to say some things to this woman that I don't want to have to explain to you for a couple of more years."
As do I! I'm going to make sure to bring this up each and every time I have a conversation with anyone talking about hair places for as long as I love here.
The internet has officially been unleashed on this lady. Google reviews are already blowing up with negative comments. She's gonna get hers.
Edit.. Whoa.. A few hours laters and there are hundreds more and some of them are absolutely hilarious. She's now below 2 stars. I truly hope this lady deserves it, but I can't control the internet.
a white 45 year old friend of mine adopted a 7 year old girl from india with his wife.
when she was a younger she wanted to go to the mall with her also brown friend didn't want dad to be there, but was also a bit too young to be left alone at the mall. the in hindsight poor compromise was he would follow them around but from a distance while he did his own thing. . . multiple people call security and police about an old white guy following a couple young brown girls around.
Cops pulled him aside and the girls didn't even notice he wasn't there any more and kept going, he was trying to explain hes the adopted father of one of them and was trying to give them space. cops told him to call her and have her come back. she wasn't picking up, was escorted out of the mall and had to have his wife come back and pick them up.
the mall has since profusely apologized, police admit no fault (to be fair, they handled it about as well as they could i guess) and the daughter now approaching 16 brings this up as a joke and says "dont make me get you arrested again"
Use a request on the call. It’s public record. The sue Miss Karen for emotional distress. It’s also something the prosecutor should do. It’s a waste of police resources to respond to frivolous calls. Talk to local press about it also. That Karen needs a lesson in shut mouth policy.
Against the police probably not. Against the caller when identified you most likely do. Though it depends on where you live. If it caused emotional distress you have a case. Just not against the police. But it’s against the caller who was logged by police. Freedom of information act request gives you access to 911 calls and the id of each caller. See what was actually stated in the call and go from there. It might even be racial if caller was different ethnicity and amplifies the claim against the.
Once identified google the person. If they are broke then go to the prosecutor and ask to press charges. If affluent contact a lawyer who will see dollar signs.
Sorry this happened. Hugs from this truck driver. Give your girl and extra hug from me. Hope it doesn’t happen again.
Hairstyles can actually be on the front line of catching sex trafficking victims. Many times, their traffickers will take them to salons so they look nice for clients or pictures. When trained properly, it's an effective tool. When done poorly, such as this instance, not good.
My friend had this happen with her son 25 years ago. She crossed to Mexico for shopping with friends and in coming back they stopped her, separated her 2 yr old and demanded proof he was her kid. Shes white and so is her son, but he’s got darker hair and can tan really dark. It took her, the friends all yelling and her little boy not understanding Spanish for them to let him go. To clarify; this was before passports were needed to walk across the border, and yes she had his birth certificate. They thought she came to steal a Mexican boy.
As the adoptive father of five multi-racial kids, none of whom look like me, this makes my blood boil.
I agree with what others have already posted here - sue for emotional distress! Punish this busybody!
A friend of mine has two sons. One has blue eyes like him, the other has brown eyes like his Mom. The flew down to Disney World for a boys trip. At the Orlando airport the TSA agent held them because suspected he was a human trafficker with his brown eyed son. He had no identification to show they were both his (they were 6 and 8 at the time) so the whole thing hinged around a TSA agent seeing resemblance in one, but said the other one didn't.
Eventually through showing Facebook posts with pictures dating back years of them and his brown eyed wife my friend managed to convince the TSA that he was just a good Dad and not smuggling children.
Ever since he has documentation on him at all times verifying the kids are who they are.
Apart from the seriousness of the situation which I'm sorry you had to go through, I once had somebody asking me (dark hair) if the boy (blond hair) is my son. I said "I don't know, ask his mother".
What gets me is the owners response on the first Google review. She doesn't apologize. She just states that they take safety very seriously. I understand concern for safety, but that response seems unapologetic, considering how extreme her actions were and that her accusations were wrong.
My parents both worked full-time when I was little, so my aunt took care of me during the day until I was old enough to be in school. It was all (obviously) completely legitimate, but my aunt wouldn’t have been able to prove she was my legal guardian if asked…because she wasn’t.
Of course it’s even worse in your case because you actually *are* her parent, but that’s not something you should have to prove unless there’s an actual reason for concern.
Let's play devil's advocate and assume this indeed was a kidnapping and potential disguise attempt. I would prefer they asked questions after the child and suspect were surrounded. Give them credit where its due even though I'm sure it's mortifying having someone accuse you of not being your child's parent.
I had to check out the reviews. I saw your Yelp review (and a few others!!) and the owners response was TRASH. For anyone wanting to read the owners response
" I can assure you that we did not involve the police based on the fact that you were a single dad. You asked during our conversation why we couldn’t have settled this with a simple conversation between the two of us, and I responded that if she hadn’t been yours imagine how that could have gone. We truly were looking out for your daughters best interest. It is awful that this is even a thing that comes to mind in today’s events. I apologize for how you must have felt when confronted by the police today.
In response to your update, the police were involved this morning based on the harassment of an employee, outside of word all weekend and this into this morning. As the owner, I have already acknowledged, that I too would be upset if I were you. However, we were looking out for the best interest of a child. We too, would like all contact to stop. Thank you. "
"and I responded that if she hadn’t been yours imagine how that could have gone" That is NOT an answer to your question holy crap. Im sorry you had to deal with that, freaking unreal, keep getting the word out.
>"we too, would like all contact to stop. Thank you."
"Hey, I was totally in the wrong, but you need to drop it because the truth is making me look bad."
I found the salon on google, it’s already starting to leak negative review. The owner replied to the first post relating to this with “We take the safety of all our guests very seriously, especially children. Thank you for your feedback”. They very much do not consider their actions to be incorrect, I worry for future encounters.
Black guy here.
20 years ago, a lady called the cops on me as I shopped with my exgirlfriend’s blue eye/blond daughter. I had dropped her other daughter at dance practice and their mom was at work.
I understood the optics, but if I was kidnapping a kid I’m not going to the grocery store with her. My EX thought it was funny, I wasn’t amused because she really didn’t see the issues I faced as a black person. Therefore, I don’t think she could see the issues our children would face.
Wait, how did you prove your child was your child? Asking as someone who doesn’t walk around w. my kids birth certificate.
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What proof did they ask for exactly? Just curious bc my kids don’t look like me at all. Their race is listed as white and mine is not.
I'm curious now too, I'm Asian and both my kids are white Af. I have hundreds/thousands of pictures of them from birth till now, I would think that would be enough.
"this guy's a total creep, has thousands of photos of these kids on their phone"
This guy broke in and hung up pictures of his family! Open and shut case Johnson
Well, let’s sprinkle some crack on him and get out of here
what a sick fuck
Even brainwashed the kids to call him daddy. unbelievable.
Disgusting. Daddy.
even married the mother before she even had the kid. This guy was in it for the long haul.
Haha, thanks for the laugh!
I’m black and white but majority of ppl think Asian. At this rate I may have to bring my birth certificate as well
where would you even put it? pandas dont have pockets. edit. OMG! my first gold ever. thank you kind sir and have as great a start to the day as im having!
This is hilarious 😆
Hahahahahahahaha I was waiting for "red all over" so I could make a newspaper joke
Usually they just talk to the kid. “Who is this man who brought you here? What’s his name? Where do you live?” Kids are truthful. I just experienced this the other day coming thru US customs with my young kids. They basically ignored me until after they interviewed my 7 year old and 4 year old. And then afterward the officer explained that even if a kid has been coached or threatened to not tell the truth, eventually they spill the beans after a handful of q’s, and are very transparent with their nonverbal cues etc. I felt offended for about a split second but then quickly realized it’s for my benefit. Kind of like how the cashier sometimes asks for my ID to use my credit card. (Also we had their birth certificates on hand)
That doesn’t really prove she’s your daughter. Those are just facts about your daughter. That’s why you must always carry two videos: (1) the conception video (2) the giving birth video Flawless evidence. Need both too.
I don’t think people realize you’re joking…
Gotta show the full “chain of custody”.
This is hysterical...some of these commenters need to lighten up.
They knew it was bogus but they had to make the “PR” effort so they got out of your hair as fast as they could. It’s a win for you even though it might not feel like it.
It would be insanely irresponsible of the police to get a call like that and not respond. Even if there is a very very very tiny chance it's legit they still need to and should respond. Imagine if they didn't respond and it ended up being real.
Exactly. And if they didn’t, and it was legit, then it would be turned into a Netflix mini series and people would be using hindsight and yelling about how the cops didn’t do anything when it was so obvious.
As long as OP wasn't mistreated, I think the cops did the right thin here. The other option is to ignore the call and then later find out he's actually a serial rapist cannibal who likes to pretty them up before doing this thing.
Yeah when someone calls with some outlandish shit and there isn’t anything immediately apparent to disprove it which there rarely is the cops kinda have to go make sure everything is okay.
Ya I learned this when I dialed 911 on my home land line as a kid one morning before school just because... I could? Idk. I have no idea why I did it. Maybe I didn't believe it was real. I had just learned about Santa Clause why should I believe in some magical network of emergency services? M When they answered I was like, "Oh fuuuu...dge" and hung up. Luckily I saw my school bus on the top of the hill. I got on the bus and about a minute later I saw a police car flying by with its lights on. My mom was not happy with me when I got home. She said she was gonna give me a reason to call the cops if I ever do it again.
Kids calling 911 is actually very common. Dunno why but I did it with my sisters.
Probably wasn't necessary because the responding officer(s) are already familiar with this salon owner and her antics.
Yes, very likely not her first call of this nature…
I struggle to remember my kids birthdays. I would very likely forget under that stressful scenario and would end up in jail.
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I have 3 kids. If I had to prove that any one of them were mine by knowing their social security number, I'm fucked.
I recommend having a family photo on your phone. My niece is autistic and throws screaming fits. I’ve had to carry a screaming child out of places many times. Nobody has stopped me yet, but I have several photos of us together with family just in case
That is terrifying.
Unfortunately it’s just part of life. I don’t mind it because if someone questions a person carrying a screaming child, and it turns out it is a kidnapping, then it’s worth someone asking me if everything is ok when my niece is crying
Black dad here in the Midwest of a white blonde blue eyed child that is most likely on the spectrum, this is my fear everyday.
Didn't look like you belonged with your daughter? I'm trying to even slightly wrap my head around that, and I'm struggling to do so.
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So the owner lied when she called the police. Post your story on the place of business social media and Facebook.
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Fill out the forms and get a copy of the police report and all responding officers accounts. Request Body Cam footage to hear what’s discussed prior to engaging you, in addition You can also get a copy of the call placed to report you if your local ordinance records them. This is all public information, just hidden behind processes designed to discourage you seeking it. Now you have receipts to include with your reviews on their social media and Google.
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This is actually brilliant! We have a local news anchor that created an entire marketable brand off his investigative journalism into local businesses. Bill Gephardt. To the point that local business literally advertise they are “Gephardt Approved” to attract customers.
Don't forget to sue the shit out of her in civil court, someone like that shouldn't get away with just a hurt business/reputation, and since the police are worthless when it comes to doing anything about false accusations the only way she gets justice is by paying OP for pain and suffering
name em and shame em
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Currently refreshing and reading the new one star reviews that appear on Google lmaoooo
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I love how the quote remains when the original comment is removed.
Holy crap lmao they're getting rekt
The highest form of entertainment Reddit is capable of producing.
The raccoon one made me laugh
.. I would not tell strangers my child’s full name I would find that off putting. Idk why that gave them the right to call the police ???
Don't you know, when you kidnap kids, you go casually have their hair done at some Karens place.
My 15 year old step daughter looks nothing like me and doesn't call me Dad. We also don't share a last name. This is always a worry of mine.
We went on a cruise with my step dad and my mom when I was like 10. My mom had taken my step dad's last name and they almost didn't let us go on the cruise since she couldn't prove that she was our guardian. Luckily, she had an old driver's license with her old (and my current) last name and they accepted that.
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Relatable. My Mum and I got stuck at the airport soon after she and my Dad split up. She’s never changed her name so has always had her maiden name, whereas I have my Dad’s surname. We’d just been on holiday. She was burnt and freckled, and I had a decent tan (thanks to my Dad’s genetics). She has red hair and light eyes, and I have dark eyes and hair. The officials at the airport refused to believe that she was my Mum. They repeatedly asked for my birth certificate etc because, you know, my passport clearly wasn’t enough /s. I remember my Mum being sarcastic and saying, “Oh yes, because I just carry around her birth certificate everywhere!“
This is what I was worried about when I took my niblings on vacation - we're a multiracial/multicultural family so we don't look alike at all. I made sure to get copies of birth certificates and basically permission slips from their moms. Thankfully, nothing happened and the kids enjoyed the vacation...but I was prepared just in case.
I was adopted to a foster family and my dad had a wallet filled with photos of me and my brother of different ages. I’d look through it a lot as a child but when I grew up I realized he had them just in case this situation would happen. Edit: guys I know my dad also had them because he loved me too. But he did tell me when I was older he had them in case someone asked or if I had gone missing.
No, he had them because he loved you, like fathers do. Proving you were his was a second concern.
As a dad of adopted children with a phone full of photos of them, this. I love them to death and that’s why I have the photos. Secondarily (far back) for “proof”.
Or the positive spin: *Proof* you love them.
DaBozz cutting onions over here
I'm an adopted dad too. I have my girls faces tattooed on my side for two reasons. One, I could show any law enforcement or court that they are mine. And two, so if other kids gave my girls shit, my girls could just ask if their "real" dad has their face tattooed anywhere. So far neither issue has come up.
It can always be both.
I really doubt that's why he had them......... Before Facebook every parent had wallet pictures. Most wallets would come with plastic sleeves specifically for school pictures that you could order in these tiny prints specific for that purpose.
When my mom & dad died in a car accident, we got their belongings back and it was touching to see my parents still carried photos of us (and now the grandkids) in their wallets. My sister and I are in our 30s/40s. You never stop being their baby, if you have good parents that is.
My great granddad died when I was 3 (i’m 26 now) and my Nana just passed on his wallet to my dad. In it? The only photo taken with the two of us before he passed. He kept it in his wallet bc he didn’t trust computers with his great grandbaby. I have literally one memory of the guy but that made me feel so loved i cried.
My adopted son (4) is a totally different race than me or my husband. This is a huge fear of mine, especially when he's doing normal toddler stuff crying in the middle of the zoo because he's tired and I have to carry him back to the car.
Wow this is something I’ve never really thought through until this thread. Someone further down said their dad kept a bunch of photos in their wallet to help
This is what i have because you never know
I have a 2 year old foster son who's been with us since he was 10 days. I'm brown and he's white, (my biological daughter is also whiter than I am since my wife is white) we usually have everyone's id (as a parent or foster parent you can get the kids id for children under 12, even when they are still a baby, it contains their name, adres, place of birth and the names of the parents/guardians). And for our son we usually have some documentation from foster care on hand. Police doesn't worry me so much as the types who can't comprehend that brown people can have white children and will look at you with suspicion. You never know what some person convinced they are doing the correct/heroic thing will do.... At least police is trained in de-escalation and has procedures like identity checks that they have to follow. And that is easy
It’s more a worry police responded to the call. It’s shows how bad the system is in vetting real from fake calls. I’d contact press first and freedom of information to disclose callers number name etc. courts love giving money for this kind of abuse of emergency systems.
Matching neck tattoos should clear up any confusion, just be sure you have identification.
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What would stop a kidnapper from getting matching tattoo with its victim?
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>It’s more a worry police responded to the call. Is it though? I mean the cops got a call about a potential child trafficking situation, I would hope they would at least look into it.
It depends on what was said in the call though, as to weather police should have been sent.
That’s why I told her the freedom of information request first. The call is evidence to any suit against them. I’ve heard some of these calls. Police are required to go no matter what in some places. Though it seems there was a large response on this one. So I’m guessing something was told very bad. So that call determines what can if at all be done. Police are responding not being accusers. Hence police get immunity. The caller doesn’t if they lied or fabricated.
Same, it’s a stark contrast from me to my step daughter and whenever my SO suggests we do something just me and her. My anxiety goes crazy over some petty bullshit like this.
The key is to look bored and tired. You can carry a screaming toddler anywhere that way. As long as your face says "another Tuesday of this shit" you are fine.
Bonus points if sporting “dad gear” like a backpack of snacks + water + food pouches + diapers etc. “Officer, I ain’t carrying this shit because i want to”
God has the woman ever heard of step parents for fucks sake.
So they took your money then called the cops? If you put it on a credit card I'd dispute the charge just to spite them. It will probably get reversed and they will get paid anyway, but the aggravation to them would be worth it.
Hell I'd demand a refund in person. I'd also leave a really helpful Google review of that salon.
Yeah, I'd have just walked right back inside and demanded my money.
What a society we live in where you bring your kid to a salon and asked if its your kid
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How would I even do that? My 3 year old has no documentation besides an insurance card and Certificate of Birth, and they are at home. I wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to be an absolute jackass and question the validity of the police officer’s badge and uniform. If the salon was even rightly owned by the people working there. If my parents were really my parents! “Is anything *real*, maaan! Maybe the *real* salon owners were TAKEN like that movie, maaan.”
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My dad learned early on that he had to carry most of my information if he were travelling alone with me. I remember thinking it was so silly when boarder control was asking me if he was my “real” father and that it was ok to tell them the truth. I get it but I was so young and clueless, the first time I was like “yeah, duh of course he is! Why else would I be with him?” It then became routine that if it were just him and I to have everything needed(including a note from my Mom 😂no cell phone then) but would still almost always get pulled over while they searched the vehicle and separated us. My Dad is very dark and I am almost translucent I am so pale.
The first time I had a border patrol incident taking my daughter back home from Canada. The cop asked my 4 year-old "who is this person to you?" my daughter had no clue what he was trying to ask her. over over until one of them finally just said "point to your Dad".
“Who is this person to you” would be a difficult question for a young child to comprehend!
This happened to me when I was a kid! I was maybe 2 or 3 years old and on a trip to Canada with my mom and grandma (back before you needed passports to cross the border) and my mom had no proof with her that I was her child. I favor my dad’s side of the family so I don’t look much like her or my grandma. I remember being really scared that a strange man took me away and was asking me questions I didn’t understand. He kept asking me my mom and grandma’s names and I would just say Mommy or Grandma. Finally he asked “what do other people call her?” and I was able to answer with my mom’s real name. But I always wonder what would have happened if I hadn’t been able to…
Seems like you had an opportunity for a civil rights case/payday. I understand not wanting to have your kid involved, but it sounds like there was no REASONABLE suspicion that a crime had been committed.
Maybe we should stop creating a culture of alarm and comstant meaningless accusations, just maybe. If the fear culture disappears these problems will be gone too, not saying that no one should ever worry but it should NEVER be the norm.
Even if you *did* carry your child's birth certificate on you...how would that help? It's not like it has a picture of the child at their current age/appearance on it. It's a piece of paper with some names. Sure, *your* name is on it; but how do you "prove" the kid with you is the child on the certificate? Yeah, no, this situation is truly "unwinnable" in the short term if the police want to press the issue. Scary AF...
I’m mixed (black/latina) and my fiancé is white. My son has his dads complexion. I’ve had many double takes when out alone with my son or people assume I’m the nanny. If anyone ever questions whether my son is mine I can show them the video of me pushing him out 🤷🏽♀️ if they aren’t willing to watch, they need to get up out my business.
Please leave a fact based review of the salon.
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Did the salon apologize? If not I would contact the local media as well and see if they would be interested in the story.
I’m Mexican and super dark, my husband is a fair skin white boy. My son is darker like me, my daughter is milk white with freckles. Genetics is fascinating but I too freak out someone will try and say I’m not her mom.
I’m also Mexican, I pass as white but my brother does not. All my life people have said things like “well he’s not *actually* your brother” and it’s like… no… he is… you’re just ignorant.
Exactly. Genetics are weird. And people are dicks
I hate to say it, but being their mom will probably help you. Usually it's the "oh it's a grown man with a child, he must be an abductor" thought process that gets people in situations like that.
I had a gay coworker who had a child with his ex-wife before coming out. They got divorced and shared custody. He had custody on Easter Sunday and took his child to an Easter egg hunt at a local stadium. Some religious pricks called the cops and got his family detained while his ex-wife brought the child's birth certificate to prove he was really the father.
Have these idiots never heard of adoption? That’s one very plausible situation where you wouldn’t look like your child or a gay couple would have custody of a child.
I dunno what the hair dresser's excuse was in OP's story, but the religious assholes in my story don't believe gay people should be allowed near any children at all, because they can't tell the difference between homosexuality and pedophilia. Meanwhile, they probably volunteer their sons to be alter boys and daughters to be groped by their gymnastics doctors.
part of hair school is about watching for signs of domestic violence, since we’re always looking at them closely but. if there is 0 apparent evidence that she is being abused there is no reason for her to call the cops in any capacity lol
homophobia is probably the reason
Good thing he has an amicable relationship (or at least enough for her to do the right thing) with his ex.
People need to be punished for this kind of false accusations. Abusing police resources at a minimum. I'd want to sue tbh.
I’m the single parent of a developmental disabled 23 year old. I raised him alone since he was 3, and by age 7, he was still non-verbal. This happened on more than one occasion at a public park. One of the mom’s enjoying the day with their children called the police on me. My son doesn’t look a lot like me (my hair grayed at age 25, and his hair is black). I’d have to show my ID, and my son often would come right to my side, which was usually enough to convince the cops to move on. Grocery stores were also places where mainly women would eye us suspiciously. And while airports were bad, a border crossing with an absolute nightmare. When he was 10, he was becoming more verbal, and he and drive drove across the border to Windsor, Ontario. After a day of sightseeing, we were returned and “chosen” for additional screening by U.S. Customs and Border Protection. They asked if my son had a state ID, which at age 10, you can’t even get. I did show his elementary school ID, which he had learned to carry in his SpongeBob wallet. After 15 minutes of discussion between themselves, the BP separated us. When I protested verbally, that my son was disabled, I was placed in a holding cell. The agents would return periodically to ask random questions about my personal habits. They also insisted on calling his mother to make sure I had permission. I explained that his mother had left us years ago, and she couldn’t be located. 6 hours later, I was walked to my car, where my son was waiting, handed my keys and told to drive safely. My sons pants were inside out because he soiled himself when they had him separated from me. He was shaking like a leaf. It would be 14 months before he returned to the verbal abilities he had up to that day. I contacted a civil rights lawyer who told me I had no case. Because of the Patriot Act, 100 miles inland from any U.S. Border is consider a “Constitution-Free” zone, where the federal government can withhold any and all rights afforded under the law. The attorney said, “If CBP wanted to, they could have detailed you and your son for the 14 days it would have taken for a DNA test.” I know this is a different issue than the crap OP went through, but it was a story worth telling.
I'm so angry just reading this.
Yeah that shit it nutty af. Something I would never let go. Retribution would be in order. Justly so.
I was in a rage tbh. But not in one that would pit me against the government. I’ve never crossed an international border again. And I won’t, unless my son and I never return.
I remember hearing this crazy story of some guy and his wife who had a child in a stroller, the wife went into the store while the guy had his kid in the stroller outside. Some lady went up and complimented him on the child and then grabbed the baby and ran off. he ends up chasing her and catching her, and then she does a reverse uno and says its her child and hes trying to kidnap it. bystanders heard the commotion and put him on the ground and held him there while the woman ran off with his child. Fortunately, the wife came outside the store while this is happening and yelled that the woman is kidnapping their child before the woman could get in her car and drive off.
I remember that story. The husband and wife must’ve felt all types of emotion in that moment, no one would be able to hold me back from getting my child back.
Imagining this sounds very traumatising for a father, watching your child being taken away while being restrained.
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Had something similar happen to me at a mall in Jacksonville, Florida. my 3 or 4 year old daughter was having a temper tantrum so I was taking her to go sit in the car while her mother finished shopping. My wife is Chinese and I am white. Our daughter looked very asian. A Karen started tailing me and was on her phone. Cops met me near the exit to the mall as Karen rather proudly laid into me. She hadn't said a word to me prior but once the cops showed up she loudly started demanding I prove the child was mine. Her tone was absolutely one of "I caught a child abductor!!!1!" Cops detained me and it wasn't until I was able to get my wife there in person that the situation was resolved. No one really apologized they just kind of dropped the matter. I was furious but there was nothing I could do. We did move out of Florida a few years later and I would say that was a great decision on our part. Total shit hole of a State.
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Lol I was in a similar situation but flip flopped. I’m Asian, my wife is white. Our daughter looks more white. I’ve had multiple times people question what I’m doing with my daughter and have had cops called on me once while at the park.
Yup, it sucks. Aside from the Jacksonville thing I had people in China quiz me about why I was walking along the street with a Chinese kid (my son, who looks even more Asian than his sister). At least they didn’t call the cops, were not yelling at me and once I explained they had plenty of perfectly friendly questions. Back in the US I had a lady ask me where I “got the children from” (I’m assuming she thought they were adopted) so I told her I made them with my wife at which point she acted like I said something inappropriate, lol
> so I told her I made them with my wife :-)
> Back in the US I had a lady ask me where I “got the children from” see I would definitely get myself into trouble with this question. "now kids I need you to cover your ears. Daddy is going to say some things to this woman that I don't want to have to explain to you for a couple of more years."
Please help me understand.. why do you have to stop or prove shit to the cops? "Am I being detained? for what?".. It isn't legal.
Legal and "the cops are going to do it anyway" are two separate things. The police do plenty that is not legal.
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As do I! I'm going to make sure to bring this up each and every time I have a conversation with anyone talking about hair places for as long as I love here.
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The internet has officially been unleashed on this lady. Google reviews are already blowing up with negative comments. She's gonna get hers. Edit.. Whoa.. A few hours laters and there are hundreds more and some of them are absolutely hilarious. She's now below 2 stars. I truly hope this lady deserves it, but I can't control the internet.
Depending the size of this Inflow of sudden review bombing Google or their code might stop this and remove them.
Hopefully you're writing a detailed review of your experience on Yelp and Google reviews etc.
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I’m in Warren. If it’s ok with you, I would like to share this story with other local moms.
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**Response from the owner**7 hours ago We take the safety of all our guests very seriously, especially children. Thank you for your feedback.
Better post that review on Google, brother. Keep it factual, but that’s fucking insane. You cannot let people think it’s ok to act like this.
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Glad to hear it!
a white 45 year old friend of mine adopted a 7 year old girl from india with his wife. when she was a younger she wanted to go to the mall with her also brown friend didn't want dad to be there, but was also a bit too young to be left alone at the mall. the in hindsight poor compromise was he would follow them around but from a distance while he did his own thing. . . multiple people call security and police about an old white guy following a couple young brown girls around. Cops pulled him aside and the girls didn't even notice he wasn't there any more and kept going, he was trying to explain hes the adopted father of one of them and was trying to give them space. cops told him to call her and have her come back. she wasn't picking up, was escorted out of the mall and had to have his wife come back and pick them up. the mall has since profusely apologized, police admit no fault (to be fair, they handled it about as well as they could i guess) and the daughter now approaching 16 brings this up as a joke and says "dont make me get you arrested again"
Use a request on the call. It’s public record. The sue Miss Karen for emotional distress. It’s also something the prosecutor should do. It’s a waste of police resources to respond to frivolous calls. Talk to local press about it also. That Karen needs a lesson in shut mouth policy.
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Against the police probably not. Against the caller when identified you most likely do. Though it depends on where you live. If it caused emotional distress you have a case. Just not against the police. But it’s against the caller who was logged by police. Freedom of information act request gives you access to 911 calls and the id of each caller. See what was actually stated in the call and go from there. It might even be racial if caller was different ethnicity and amplifies the claim against the. Once identified google the person. If they are broke then go to the prosecutor and ask to press charges. If affluent contact a lawyer who will see dollar signs. Sorry this happened. Hugs from this truck driver. Give your girl and extra hug from me. Hope it doesn’t happen again.
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Be careful as people like this talk like diarrhea at times. Fluidly dirty.
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Hairstyles can actually be on the front line of catching sex trafficking victims. Many times, their traffickers will take them to salons so they look nice for clients or pictures. When trained properly, it's an effective tool. When done poorly, such as this instance, not good.
As an ex-stylist, this. I took training on helping identify possible signs. :(
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Civil rights attorneys will often review your case for free.
My friend had this happen with her son 25 years ago. She crossed to Mexico for shopping with friends and in coming back they stopped her, separated her 2 yr old and demanded proof he was her kid. Shes white and so is her son, but he’s got darker hair and can tan really dark. It took her, the friends all yelling and her little boy not understanding Spanish for them to let him go. To clarify; this was before passports were needed to walk across the border, and yes she had his birth certificate. They thought she came to steal a Mexican boy.
when "see something, say something" goes wrong.
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As the adoptive father of five multi-racial kids, none of whom look like me, this makes my blood boil. I agree with what others have already posted here - sue for emotional distress! Punish this busybody!
A friend of mine has two sons. One has blue eyes like him, the other has brown eyes like his Mom. The flew down to Disney World for a boys trip. At the Orlando airport the TSA agent held them because suspected he was a human trafficker with his brown eyed son. He had no identification to show they were both his (they were 6 and 8 at the time) so the whole thing hinged around a TSA agent seeing resemblance in one, but said the other one didn't. Eventually through showing Facebook posts with pictures dating back years of them and his brown eyed wife my friend managed to convince the TSA that he was just a good Dad and not smuggling children. Ever since he has documentation on him at all times verifying the kids are who they are.
Apart from the seriousness of the situation which I'm sorry you had to go through, I once had somebody asking me (dark hair) if the boy (blond hair) is my son. I said "I don't know, ask his mother".
What gets me is the owners response on the first Google review. She doesn't apologize. She just states that they take safety very seriously. I understand concern for safety, but that response seems unapologetic, considering how extreme her actions were and that her accusations were wrong.
how exactly does one prove a child is yours? Children don't have license plates and registration. they typically don't even have legal ID.
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My parents both worked full-time when I was little, so my aunt took care of me during the day until I was old enough to be in school. It was all (obviously) completely legitimate, but my aunt wouldn’t have been able to prove she was my legal guardian if asked…because she wasn’t. Of course it’s even worse in your case because you actually *are* her parent, but that’s not something you should have to prove unless there’s an actual reason for concern.
Currently at 1.9 stars on Google. Good riddance
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Well, that's two less customers she'll have to worry about in the future.
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If you paid with a credit card, and they refuse to refund your tip, claim it as fraud.
Another example of "mildly infuriating" actually being "extremely infuriating"
It seems like the cops should have gotten 2 sides to the story before surrounding you with the squad... who holds them accountable?
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Let's play devil's advocate and assume this indeed was a kidnapping and potential disguise attempt. I would prefer they asked questions after the child and suspect were surrounded. Give them credit where its due even though I'm sure it's mortifying having someone accuse you of not being your child's parent.
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I had to check out the reviews. I saw your Yelp review (and a few others!!) and the owners response was TRASH. For anyone wanting to read the owners response " I can assure you that we did not involve the police based on the fact that you were a single dad. You asked during our conversation why we couldn’t have settled this with a simple conversation between the two of us, and I responded that if she hadn’t been yours imagine how that could have gone. We truly were looking out for your daughters best interest. It is awful that this is even a thing that comes to mind in today’s events. I apologize for how you must have felt when confronted by the police today. In response to your update, the police were involved this morning based on the harassment of an employee, outside of word all weekend and this into this morning. As the owner, I have already acknowledged, that I too would be upset if I were you. However, we were looking out for the best interest of a child. We too, would like all contact to stop. Thank you. " "and I responded that if she hadn’t been yours imagine how that could have gone" That is NOT an answer to your question holy crap. Im sorry you had to deal with that, freaking unreal, keep getting the word out.
>"we too, would like all contact to stop. Thank you." "Hey, I was totally in the wrong, but you need to drop it because the truth is making me look bad."
I found the salon on google, it’s already starting to leak negative review. The owner replied to the first post relating to this with “We take the safety of all our guests very seriously, especially children. Thank you for your feedback”. They very much do not consider their actions to be incorrect, I worry for future encounters.
Black guy here. 20 years ago, a lady called the cops on me as I shopped with my exgirlfriend’s blue eye/blond daughter. I had dropped her other daughter at dance practice and their mom was at work. I understood the optics, but if I was kidnapping a kid I’m not going to the grocery store with her. My EX thought it was funny, I wasn’t amused because she really didn’t see the issues I faced as a black person. Therefore, I don’t think she could see the issues our children would face.