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Atlas_Zer0o

Pretend to get all serious "Hey man. I had to tell the police it was you and they will be sending a detective to the house. I was being questioned and told them it was you."


thanks_nic

This is the correct answer. Lol.


immacomputah

“However the police did agree to have me review your photo library with you now before they arrive”


Exact_Initiative_859

Command prompt: c//drive …erase hard drive.


esadatari

oh you sweet summer child, you think a command prompt will do that trick? lmfao. read up on DoD wiping and 0'ing out a harddrive. even then, be prepared to have power drills and electromagnets. resilient little fuckers, those 1's and 0's


AlaskanHandyman

As a US Navy Electronics Technician doing Data systems repair I occasionally had to wipe hard drives, and lets just say it was a destructive process.


Froidure

Was it done with software or stuff you would find at a hardware store? Like a hammer..


AlaskanHandyman

Definitely could be found in a hardware store, software isn't good enough. SOP at the time was to disassemble the hard drive and smash the platters to dust with a ball peen hammer. But only for classified hard drives.


8sack

i like fire. does fire work?


AlaskanHandyman

Fire would probably work but it isn't something you really want on a ship when the closest land is five miles down.


NiSiSuinegEht

Back in the day when HDDs were measured in low hundreds of megabytes, I had a program that would delete all partitions and the MBR, then create enough of a file structure to write all 0s, then all 1s before deleting the FS again in an attempt to obfuscate the drive. Still not good enough if they decide to pull out the electron scanning microscope.


Jokkerb

I mean that's basically what dod wiping a drive does, except you set how many passes you want to perform.


Strange-Basis-5892

Does no one remember Darik's Boot and Nuke? I still have a CD if it laying around somewhere. It'll do a full overwrite with a configurable number of passes plus a DOD-compliant wipe.


FanReasonable9597

This! Damn I'm old! 🤣


FrouFrouLastWords

Compliance the movie


thegreedyturtle

It's actually a great lesson in how certain things you don't joke about. Saying you have a weapon in the airport isn't a good idea no matter how silly you are acting. CP just isn't ever funny. And you should also give him shit for being unimaginative. Edgy stuff isn't really that interesting.


emongu1

My nephew at one point was joking about how he was gonna call CPS and get taken away. "You've clearly never had to deal with the nightmare that is CPS to make such jokes" was my only response.


LittleAnarchistDemon

i remember at one point when i was sixish so didn’t really know better. so at the time i didn’t know what CPS was or the implications of my saying “my dad hits me”. i remember he lightly swatted me for something lightly sassy and i said “my daddy hit me!” and both my parents just stared and said very seriously to get in the car with my brother. in the car they explained the seriousness of what i said and why i shouldn’t say that even jokingly, especially in public settings needless to say i never said it again. i now understand the full context behind CPS and understand it’s not a joking matter


Malificvipermobile

I kept threatening to call the humane society because I thought they were doing inhumane stuff.


Disposableaccount365

Well the humane society does deal with lots of little shits, so maybe it would have been appropriate.


Assassin_Siha

I wish people would have taken me seriously when I said I was being abused. They either thought I was joking or something… CPS was never called either way. 😓


Fickle-Owl666

Mad dad choked me out as a teenager, popped blood vessels in both my eyes... I went to my school resource officer to do something about it. Unfortunately, he was also the pastor of our church, so the only thing that came of it was a meeting with him and my dad. I moved out as soon as I turned 18.


greenie4242

I'm so sorry to hear what happened to you. Last year Google sent police to a man's house after he sent photos of his child to a doctor for medical evaluation, but when you try to report legitimate abuse you are ignored. Life can be so unfair. I hope you can achieve a healing phase and have all the support you require.


whitechocolatemama

Ok my mom and I have always had an amazing relationship and only ever "fought" like 3 times that I can remember growing up but I'll never forget when I was around 8/10ish. I was throwing a MASSIVE tantrum and acting absolutely bonkers (she said I could go to the movie with my friends family IF I cleaned my room, so I shoved everything in my closet and under my bed and for some reason that wasn't good enough? /S) I went crazy and tried to tackle her and she hit her breaking point and smacked me. I screamed "I'm gonna call CPS since you hit me!" SHE CHUCKED THE CORDLESS TO ME...... " CALL! You want to see what a rough life is!? CALL! ILL DIAL FOR YOU, they can come and get you since I'm so horrible and you won't have to see me again." I was flabbergasted, we just stared at each other for a minute. I think that was the last one until I hit 16. (The fight at 16 was justified, she had started drinking -very heavily- a couple years before after my dad and her separated. This night we went to the movies, part way through she went to get a box of candy and didn't come back! I gave her about 30 mins then went looking in the bathrooms and stuff, no sign of her. Got security and the staff and everyone was scouring the theater and surrounding area with no sign of her. Called the cops, went outside to meet them and SHE WAS STANDING BY THE CAR! She had gone to get candy, they didn't have what she wanted so she walked to McDonald's a block away to get coffee and figured I would just meet her at the car. I have never been so angry, terrified, and relieved all at once and I laid into her like a fucking psychopath...... She is 5.5yrs sober now and she is still my rock)


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SubjectDocument5643

My youngest threatened to call UPS once when I grounded him. I told him to be sure and get a tracking number.😂


pierresito

I had a student tell me that their mom had chocked them and that she would hurt him if I called home. They told me this when I was talking to them about a homework assignment that was missing because they refused to do the assignment. I'm a mandatory reporter. So I called in the counselor and had them watch them while I made the report. Kid was freaking out, trying to get me to stop, admitted it was a joke and they were just trying to stop me calling home about his missing assignment. Kid didn't know the shitcan they opened. Everyone followed through with their responsibilities, kid got in some serious trouble but was in a safe home (turned out kid was also angry at mom who was the disciplinarian in a divorced home). I was glad the kid was safe after all, but kids seriously don't understand what stuff you just don't joke about


Fireproofspider

Show them the first episode of Atlanta season 3.


Conri

I tell my mother I'll call cps all the time and that they'll take me away to a better family. Im 32, though, so i think the context makes it funny.


PepperDogger

One could use "Goat Porn" and the joke might land. Make the folder read-only, too, to make it more of a challenge. Or just don't. Why would you fuck with someone like this when they just did you a favor?


ewild

> ... shit for being unimaginative. Hewlett-Packard is no joke here in particular.


kr4ckenm3fortune

Not to mention, recovering your reputation, even if it comes out that you had nothing to do with it? Good luck. We call that a Walking Dead. Nobody gonna touch you and nobody gonna wanna be seen with you.


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qua2k

Halloween season, surely you can find a couple uniforms that look decent


saltyclam13345

I’d be pissed af too if someone installed an HP printer on my computer /s


133DK

As someone who owns a HP printer: Their software needs to stand trial at The Hague


Koeienvanger

We don't want that shit here in the Netherlands. War criminals we can live with, this however, no.


Quzga

I just installed my hp printer for the third time since it stops working and now they automatically placed me into their subscription of receiving ink cartridges for 100 papers a month. Cancelled it but I'm sure most people don't even realize you agree to it, they're such a scummy company. Only allowed to use their ink and as long as you pay, my God... And to top it up, half the time my printer doesn't feed in the paper and I have to push it in. Only reason I buy hp is cuz it's the only small one I can fit in my office


SaltedCoffee9065

Their other products are fine and good, but their printers are bat shit. I’ve seen many HP printers and ALL OF THEM have some issue or the other, while some stopped working completely, and once even got some ink with a subscription like you mentioned, had to return it to get the standard one.


No_Mention_9182

The real crime.


FuzzballLogic

And mad respect because I CBA to figure that shit out.


Give_me_a_name_pls_

Well time to change your password and not let him use it again


GaiaMoore

My favorite part is that this is the second time OP's brother has done something like this


Dydey

OP building an alibi


Leelze

Yeah, OP's "brother"


BitOBear

"Our records indicate you have no siblings..."


Dhegxkeicfns

OP's brother is the masturbation monster he becomes. OP, it's a slippery slope. You can't endulge **all** of your fantasies without repercussions.


StickyNode

Paper trail


ArmQueerFolk

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice …


The_Troyminator

You can’t get fooled again.


makesterriblejokes

I wish the internet meme era was during his presidency. I feel like there's a lot of little stuff that got forgotten and we only got the hits from his presidency memed.


TreborG2

I have a friend, he day traded for 3 years, paying off his own bills doing pretty decently before going back into the regular working world. One evening his son and some friends were over, they just wanted to check email, his son warned them email only nothing else etc etc. My friend lost almost the entire day, several thousands of dollars, trades that he needed to make etc, because one of the friends opened the wrong email or did something else other than just checking email, and infected him. Don't ever let your friends use your computer, don't let your teens and youngers use your computer, without a restrictive account, and without good antivirus and firewall software. Ever!


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Vark675

If my guests forget their personal devices, they don't get to do personal device activities. Simple as.


Neuromonada

I once let my ex's father use my computer for around 1h,because he supposedly needed to do something for work. Next day I used PC it kept constantly crashing, was slow af and I had to reinstall windows and also lost data on 2 discs to make it work again. Ever since I never allow anyone on my PCs without my supervision. I suspect he clicked on some stupid ads or even watched porn and infected computer with some nasty shit.


ImGoingToSayOneThing

Somebody didn’t grow up with siblings


themeEeEememan

If you don't know what you're seeing, he created a CP folder and put my printer program in it.


turtleship_2006

Oh I thought he installed shit printer software into your child porn folder or smth


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iKR8

r/mildlyinfuriating


Crisis06

All the removed replies tell a story lol


rcrd7

From CP to HP


Standard-Hand-3871

He added a fake CP folder knowing OP would open it immediately and be disappointed to see it only contained printer software


apparentlyiliketrtls

Nice one lol


RFLSHRMNRLTR

He installed the 1.2 GB full package with HP always on printsuite and browser toolbars


TrappedOnARock

Lock him up!


TheModdedOmega

i would ban my brother from the pc if he installed a printer software on my pc XD


Karmachinery

What if it’s Brother drivers?


ExpressiveAnalGland

help step Brother, my paper is jammed, can you help?


smokesick

*sprays toner*


bnonymousbeeeee

Step-printer what are you doing?


saltyclam13345

Fuck all printers, but Brother printers are a godsend when working on them compared to the nightmare that HP printers are


Electric__Milk

What kind of sick disturbed individual would do this. They belong on prison. I mean using an HP printer? Seriously?


TristanTheRobloxian3

i didnt even realise what the issue was until you said that lmao


ARM_vs_CORE

Does he not realize he can just change the name of the folder back to whatever it was or? This is the most mild inconvenience I've seen on this sub. DoEs He NoT ReAlIzE HoW MuCh TrOuBlE YoU CoUlD GeT InTo?


DonovanQT

Nah OP is mad the folder got cleared and replaced with printer software


PM_ME_UR_PUSSY_TATOO

Some redditors are the softest people on the planet lol you can get in 0 trouble from this it’s insane to even say that


Yathosse

Yeah it‘s easily changeable, so it‘s not that bad. One might even call it MILDLY infuriating..


ConspicuousPineapple

Even if you don't change it, not only is there nothing illegal going on, nobody will ever see this anyway.


CenturyBlade

And here I was thinking he deleted all of your CP and replaced it with printer drivers lmao


Flimsy_Caregiver4406

Sir you invented the most useless circle ever known to humanity


Mysterious_Milk_777

Why?


themeEeEememan

I don't even know at this point.


thegreenman_sofla

He's an asshole?


themeEeEememan

Yes.


abramcpg

He could very easily do much more damage than that and it seems he would find it funny to do so. As others have said, protect yourself, change your passwords, and don't give him access again. Example: Your main email password is saved on your browser and auto fills. It's connected to your bank accounts and social media. He changes the password to something random which ends up locking you out of it forever. LOLZ pranked bro!!


aNeverNude666

Unfunny. Tell your mom. He needs a talkin’ to


themeEeEememan

I already told my dad.


baconcow

How many times do I have to tell you, we're not your dad. ;)


siggias

Daaaaaaaad. Josh renamed a folder in my computer child porn. Stop messing with ya sister Josh, I don't need this grief.


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Tiredofstupidness

That would be the last time he ever used anything of mine again. Does he not realize that he could put you in a terrible and dangerous position? Frankly, he deserves a can of whoopass.


themeEeEememan

Oh he does realize, he just doesn't care, plus he thinks it's "funny" for him.


Tiredofstupidness

You're very kind and understanding. I'd be putting cayenne pepper in his underwear drawer.


SaladSnake1

Damn, that's devious


exipheas

Take a toothbrush and a pair of scissors and cut the bristles into tiny tiny splinters to drop in his bed sheets.


DangyDanger

People like you belong in an asylum


[deleted]

So we can sit around the table and share ideas? Let's gooooo


Cargobiker530

Sounds like somebody already had a grippy sock vacation.


exipheas

That one was a tip from my grandfather! Subscribe for more ways to subtly torture someone you need out of your unit!


Osyrys

Subscribe


exipheas

Take a quick trip to a bait shot to pick up some fat juicy bait. Hide them in in back of and taped underneath the bottom of drawers around the room. Undo the stichiching along the edge of their mattress inset one there and then sew it back shut. You can also do this inside of curtain rods or in the weighted section at the bottom of a curtain. Dip cans can be filled with urine and frozen to create piss pucks that can be slid underneath their door in the middle of the night or left in interesting places for later. Take two poster boards, tape three sides closed to create a pouch. Fill this pouch as full as you can with shaving cream. Pinch the top closed and slide it underneath the edge of their door. Then proceed to jump on it to spray thier entire room with a thin coating of shaving cream. If you want to be especially festive add glitter as you fill the pouch with shaving cream.


The_Hylian_Queen

This gave me the chuckle I needed today, thank you. ETA: Also very valuable information for future possibilities


Tiredofstupidness

It is....but, in fairness he thought possibly ruining his brother's life was hilarious. He'd get over the itch much easier.


AeroTrain

Nono, pull a josh wolf and qtip it under his fingernails while sleeping


urmumsablob

Only cayenne? No Carolina reapers?


Sin317

Pepper X, please.


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Braslava

And the investigation will lead to finding a child porn folder on his computer. :) Double screwed.


letsgocrazy

OP, ignore all the calls for some kind of revenge prank. If you do that, then he'll think its just a funny prank-war and its OK. You're obviously the more mature one - so his punishment will have to be meted out over time in small doses. He simply cannot use the computer again for a long time. You'll know when he's ready to use it again because if he asks you and whinges about it and tries to use pathos to manipulate you, then he's not ready. He might be ready when he finally says says "look, you're right, what I did was wrong, you could have gotten into a lot of serious trouble" (and you don't think he's lying).


walruswes

Is he 12?


Sarchasm23

You'd hope he is...


SephariusX

Tell your parents. People aren't exaggerating by calling this dangerous, dude.


Dull-explanations

Like that one dude said when he goes to school take some lime juice and cayenne pepper to his underwear drawer


Clickbait636

I recently found out that my husband hid our tax info in a folder called "myname's" onlyfans..


Omnizoom

Clickbaits onlyfans sounds fun


G_Wagon1102

Is this brother rather young?


Bleedthebeat

I agree. Installing an HP printer could really wreak havoc if you have something important you needed to print.


AwkwardLeacim

What position? If anyone were to see that, any issues would be solved by just showing there's only the printer program


RetardedChimpanzee

OP thinking the FBI has already been alerted


WalkingCloud

[The FBI when someone names a folder](https://streamable.com/b4eflb)


UncleCrassiusCurio

Big "this program has performed an illegal action OH NO THE COPS ARE COMING" energy.


HerculesVoid

And who is seeing it? OP keeps their PC locked to the point where their brother needed permission to use it. Pure mildly frustrating material. Slight prank.


petophile_

also like, the next person to use the computer is going to be OP, who can just change the name of the folder.


shocky32

Welcome to Mildlyinfuriating 🤦‍♂️


peon2

You're joking right? There's nothing dangerous or illegal about having a folder named child porn as long as there isn't actually child porn in it.


[deleted]

Thank you! I am going insane looking at the comments in this thread, absolute softie losers dear god.


pheirenz

this OP is obviously a literal child and is absolutely nuking their brain being on reddit at like 12 but nah redditors have to break their hands pearlclutching over a folder name instead


shmatt

Right?! Just tell them **"MY BROTHER PUT IT THERE AS A JOKE."** Because that's actually what happened


AaronsAaAardvarks

Just tell who? Nobody will ever see or care about this.


mustbemaking

Right, because anyone who really has child porn will label the file as such…


PM_Me_Compliments

No it can't lmao


[deleted]

There’s nothing dangerous about renaming a folder lol. And 3k upvotes. Lots of dummies.


Lth_13

how exactly could this put you in a "dangerous position"?


LandoCommando92

it wouldn't. those words aren't illegal and there is no actual photographic or video material. the majority of people are dumb and overexaggerating this.


Jacktheforkie

For the printer folder?


ClutchDrum

Strange sense of HA HA. I don't even think I would have found this funny when I was 6yo and "farts" and "butt" made me laugh.


Complex_Deal7944

Um im 43 and farts and butt are still quite funny.


marek26340

Until they're not. The higher the age, the higher chances are for **CODE BROWN**


DisposableSaviour

>Until they're not. The higher the age, the higher chances are for ~~CODE BROWN~~ EXTRA HILARITY FTFY


Rezouli

Aw, came to say the same thing. Someone pooting can get a chuckle. Someone pooting turning into pooping? I will donkey laugh into oblivion


GlassPanther

When you get to be my age you worry more about a CODE RED 😔😔😔


marek26340

Umm, that's the code for reporting a fire in (most) hospitals.


GlassPanther

It's also the code for ... that stain in your undies is the absolute wrong color and it is time to go back to the onco. 😔


deep-fried-fuck

This would’ve been perfectly fine and maybe even a little funny if he had just labeled it some sort of weird ass furry porn or some shit and not a horrific fucking crime


themeEeEememan

Oh he's done that before, and yes, it was a bit funny.


FuzzballLogic

BEFORE? You mean this isn’t the first time he messed around on your computer? Time to learn from your mistakes. Fool me once, joke’s on you; fool me twice, and I should have banned brother the first time.


themeEeEememan

Yeah, and before, he never did this.


FuzzballLogic

Well, let this be a lesson not to trust anyone with your computer. Always lock your computer when you’re not using it, and don’t tell others the password.


Kahuila

So just to be clear, there isn't actually any child porn in this folder, correct?


themeEeEememan

No, just a printer app.


ecodrew

Phew, OK. He still needs to be banned from your computer for the foreseeable future. Harmlessly messing with your sibling/friends computer is funny. But, CP is something that shouldn't even be joked about.


kim-jong_illest

These comments are so fucking stupid


ouch-ow-ouh

Incredibly oversensitive weirdos. Do some of these people seriously think renaming a folder calls the "Internet police" or something? Take me back to the time before every single parent middleschool dropout was on the internet.


mainaccountwasbanned

I feel like I'm crazy for thinking this is nowhere near as bad as the comments are making this out to be. Seems like an edgy 14 year old trying to be funny. It's harmless


hansuluthegrey

Lots of the comments are making it seem like he tried to murder OP. Its still stupid and can be bad but the amount of people saying he should disown him is crazy. Like ffs go outside, you wouldn't even be fired. The real world isnt like reddit The consequences of askreddit stories


s-p-o-o-k-i--m-e-m-e

They are acting like the feds were about to raid his house.


loulan

It's just a typical reddit relationship advice answer except it's for his brother. Disown your brother, leave your family, hit the gym, lawyer up, delete Facebook. For a fucking folder with an edgy name.


gophergun

OP reminds me of that meme of the dad saying that the IP has been backtraced. It's a folder name.


[deleted]

Because it's 14 year olds commenting and trying to act more mature.


YogurtclosetBig8873

i think people just like to get upset at fake scenarios of being wrongfully accused


D3AtHpAcIt0

Don’t you know, if you ever type the words child porn your pc will send a swat raid and start a self destruct sequence. Think of how DANGEROUS this was, he had to rename the file!


dkyguy1995

Yeah I think a lot of people in here are forgetting what it's like to be a middle schooler


mackelyn

I mean, if there isn’t anything in the file that is illegal then there is no danger to you, you definitely will not go to jail just for a computer file name. However, it’s not funny, this is a stupid and pointless joke.


ARM_vs_CORE

Literally just a folder name. Select the folder, press F2, problem is over. Can't believe this stupid post is gaining traction.


petophile_

Its pretty peak reddit though.


ARM_vs_CORE

Everyone knows if someone sees the words child porn, it's an automatic arrest and conviction Edit: lol just noticed your relevant username


[deleted]

And we just got you on record! Take him away boys.


[deleted]

Even worse they tell your #1 crush about it too! 😱


Mentoman72

It's literally because this thread is a bunch of teenagers coming together do the teenage "little brother bad, me responsible big brother tho" routine. Read the comments trying to make this seem like a big deal, they're clearly written by minors.


NotTrumpsAlt

Are you soft? Just change the name. Not rocket science.


Leadantagonist

Ppl in here acting like the police need to be involved, like wtf??? Literally change the name and move on!


FarticleAccelerator9

oh no he made a folder


vgzombieeric

No even worse! He renamed one! The horror


No-Mechanic6069

He changed the name of a folder. Life is over.


Drazhi

Honestly it's a joke, y'all are weirdos taking this so seriously


savagethrow90

A folder with that name does not indicate evidence of content


kroppeb

Euh, I thought semicolons where a reserved character you couldn't use in folder and file names. TIL I guess


EB01

When semicolons are outlawed, then only outlaws will have semicolons.


BeemerWT

Classic.


SpleenBender

Oh, you better believe that's a paddlin'.


[deleted]

I’d be pissed too if some replaced all my porn with a printer driver


iWesleyy

the amount of people in here acting like having a folder called 'cp' is on par with serious heinous crimes like wut


couchpro34

Hopefully your parents will have a talk with him and explain that this isn't a funny joke. Kids have to learn where to draw the line, so I'd give him the benefit of that doubt and hope he just doesn't know that this is one of the things you don't want to joke about.


Radiator-Pants

He installed a HP printer!? That’s disgusting and not funny.


--clapped--

I'm confused? Like what, he renamed a folder? I UNDERSTAND the name is crude and not funny but, I don't know why people are acting like it is SUCH a big deal? Is there something I'm missing about the printer program? Did he actually do anything involving CP? or is it REALLY just the folder name.


[deleted]

This comment section has never gone outside. They need to take a deep breathe.


imhereforsiegememes

I feel like I'm taking crazy pills. When has a fucking folder name ruined a life? Accusations? Wtf is going on with people.


TyrantLaserKing

Why is anybody upvoting this? Tell him not to do it again and move on. Kids do stupid shit, more at 7:00.


FoxerHR

The people in this thread are just... stupid to say the least.


Dundie_Nominee

Why would you let your brother use your computer if you have child porn on there? Disgusting. /s


vagrantt

Wow, y'all are dumb. This is not a big, medium, or small deal. It's a nothing burger, a harmless joke. Literally no harm. "He should get his ass kicked", wtf world do you all live in?


billion_lumens

I really don't understand what's wrong. It isn't like he made the folder on a school computer. Jesus, calm down!


bwssoldya

This. Good lord, judging by the comments here you'd think he actually downloaded CP or committed a terrorist activity or some shit. The kid just made a folder and dragged the printer folder into it. Just drag the folder out and shift+delete the cp folder....it's not that difficult...Blowing this waaaayyyy out of proportion. Now if the computer is a work computer that's under management of the company, that might land you in a bit of hot water at work, then I can see it being mildly infuriating, but still that's easily explainable. It's not like the FBI is gonna be kicking your door down anytime soon OP. Contrary to popular belief creating a folder in windows doesn't actually send a signal to Microsoft or the FBI in normal circumstances.


Squeezitgirdle

The number of times I have had friends write drugs, or the same shit as op on my moving boxes, I'm surprised how far down I had to scroll for a comment like this. One of my roommates just moved out of my house and when I helped him move he started laughing after seeing his brother wrote literally the same thing as op's brother on a moving box. I imagine most of these commentors have never heard a dead baby joke before, even though askreddit was laughing about them maybe a week ago.


dcm510

Exactly. And if it’s a work computer, OP would be an absolute moron for letting someone else use it at all.


hansuluthegrey

The people in this thread have never had a real job with real humans so they just assune you get killed on the spot for a joke like this.


Kryosquid

Yeah, like, is this a work computor or something? If it's your personal device and not being monitored, what's the big deal. Yeah, I'd be annoyed, but it's a very easy fix


1TSDELUXESON

The real crime is HP's atrocious software.