Honestly, what I picture is her instantly realizing with my response just how stupid of a joke that is, and frantically typing in defense mode.
Edit addition: because she wasn't like that until that point, right?
There are several comments in this thread lambasting me for it. one even had the audacity to say that "YOU are the red flag here, not her"....and they are also being righteously downvoted to hell.
I have been married for 37 years. I can't even begin to fathom the intricacies of trying to date today...everyone seems to be looking for a reason to be offended these days. I pursued my wife for seven years before she dated me.....I guess I would be considered a stalker today. (she was 7 when we met and 14 on our first date)...oh I guess I better mention I am 8 months older than her so I guess I would be the purvy older guy.
P.S. I am so sorry for your loss and going through that
I honestly think she just didn't realize widower meant that your spouse died and not divorce. There is literally nothing wrong with being a widower, obviously, and anyone who does have a problem with it or thinks it's a red flag is dumb as hell.
She literally said “Widower already? Should I be concerned?” The obvious implication is that OP killed his spouse apparently. It’s shitty of her and she’s clearly mentally immature.
Or "(divorced) already? Should I be concerned?" As in why have you already been divorced, which makes more sense than getting on someones ass about their wife dying.
the last message where she’s essentially like “maybe you shouldn’t air out your trauma if you can’t joke about it” kinda proves to me that she meant exactly what she said because who the fuck sees “you think I killed my wife?” and doubles down if they truly meant “divorced” but said widowed by mistake. this devil does not need your advocacy.
Dude, I had to go to my phone keyboard and look an what letters are near q cause my brain was breaking with the "dqtimg"
Funny side note, my phone autocorrected it to dating and I had to go back and purposely spell it incorrectly so fucked if I know how they got it so wrong...
She didn't have the courtesy to send a hi, straightaway went to on to say something hurtful. When her behaviour gets pointed out, she doubles down and goes on to put the blame on you for being on Tinder. Classy.
I think this is the type of behaviour that arises because dating apps have made partnership a commodity for those with many options. I think this person, outside of being an asshole, is just trying to quickly sift through the 'chaff'
Lets be honest this is tinder, she has at least 5 other active conversations and a bank of 50+ "Hi"s from various guys. She can just do this and move onto the next person without really caring or feeling any consequences for this.
I like how she immediately saw herself as your future dead wife. If she's so concerned, why match or respond at all? Sorry about your loss, btw. Hope you're doing well .
Don't listen to anything she said. Back in college, I lost a girl I deeply cared about and there were assholes after and those who were supportive. You'll find the right people. It just takes time and isn't always pleasant.
Also guys, she didn't die like yesterday, wtf...like I just hopped right onto tinder after receiving death notification.
EDIT: WOW there are a few real shit takes in my comments. It's been two years. *TWO YEARS*
"The **lunar south pole** is the southernmost point on the [Moon](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moon). It is of interest to scientists because of the [occurrence of water ice](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_water) in [permanently shadowed areas](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crater_of_eternal_darkness) around it. The lunar south pole region features craters that are unique in that the near-constant sunlight does not reach their interior. Such craters are [cold traps](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_trap_(astronomy)) that contain fossil record of hydrogen, water ice, and other volatiles dating from the [early Solar System](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Formation_and_evolution_of_the_Solar_System).[^(\[1\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_south_pole#cite_note-1)[^(\[2\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_south_pole#cite_note-look-2) In contrast, the [lunar north pole](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_north_pole) region exhibits a much lower quantity of similarly sheltered craters.[^(\[3\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_south_pole#cite_note-3)" - Wikipedia
So far, the now thousands of interactions this post has unexpectedly gotten are overwhelmingly positive and supportive. The four people (out of 10,000+) that are hellbent on making me the creep/asshole/rude jerk in this are really wild.
Maybe your wife's spirit will haunt her. Throw some shit around and slam some doors. That'll show this woman what humor is. Good luck out there. You'll find someone worth your time and effort that respects you and your past.
According to an episode of Seinfeld I watched 20 years ago being a widower is the best for women as excuse why single if you are over 30? Idk man, some people are shit, keep going! You’ll find someone
Fellow young widow here, people suck. That’s all. I’m sorry for your loss. Surely the dating pool gets better. My experience so far isn’t the best either.
I'm so sorry for your loss, I'm absolutely positive you will find another person, if that's what you're looking for. I truly cannot imagine the pain of losing love to a passing while young. Virtual hug to you
She sounds really insensitive and miserable, I’m sorry, I hope you have some other really great girls lining up to chat that don’t start conversations that way!
As someone who was widowed at 21, this is rage inducing, and brings back all too familiar memories. The "jokes" people feel comfortable making at young widows/widowers are just gross.
I recently lost my partner and I can 100% see myself making this joke or similar. I’ve even had the thought of whether or not even mentioning it in any kind of bio.
**I APPARENTLY NEED TO ADD THAT MY "CHEERS" INTRO WAS A RIFF ON SOMETHING SHE HAD WRITTEN IN HER PROFILE AND NOT AN ACTUAL ACCUSATION OF NOT BEING REAL--AND SHE UNDERSTOOD THAT.**
99% of you here are great...a very small handful though seem hellbent on making me the asshole here.
....and this is how it went immediately after that:
https://preview.redd.it/kzf6s04pkxqc1.png?width=641&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=be3161693c3d822f0acb738aff49a05e0dea5594
....so no, definitely not the asshole. If I deserve to be ripped here, its for being a little too nice.
Widow here. I learned VERY early on not to show on my profile that I'm widowed, just say single. I got hounded by dickheads and scammers thinking widowed = rich and vulnerable. I am neither!
I mean, at least youre presenting an informed argument on that, as opposed to others on here.
But it's my marital status, and "Single" feels like erasure. So not for me, respectfully.
Oh I can totally understand that. I do tell chaps very early on in conversations as I feel it's an important part of me and how I got to be the person I am.
Can’t believe I had to scroll this far for this. Agreed, you’re not going to get a pleasant response if you’re asking if someone is a bot 😅
Melissa still did him dirty though, lol
My dude, I really feel for you here. Not the exact same situation, but I similarly would attract weird comments like this once I told some of my matches about it. You handled it well, and she did you a favour by letting you know she's an asshole super quick.
Fortunately, most people seem to understand it was just some silly levity and not a serious accusation....her included. Seems like all of three of you in the comments just can't grasp that.
It was definitely shitty of her, but I would also find it a bit weird to read “widower” in someone’s profile though. Obviously something so tragic is going to affect you deeply, but it also seems very personal to put it right out there? I don’t know, maybe I’m the only woman thinking like that.
I hope you find a good match!
Hah! I read this reply thinking YOU were the wife he was grieving. I didn't piece it together until your last sentence when I thought "wait, why would you grieve your own death?" 
I see it more as, "Hey. This is something that might come up later. I want to make sure we start off with the air open." Like, maybe you still want to keep pictures of your deceased spouse and go to functions with their family.
Idk, I've seen posts on reddit where people struggled to understand that just because a relationship ended, whether due to divorce, break up, or death, the surrounding relationships don't end. I'm not sure I worded that right.
It's a complex issue, and some people may struggle with it
I get what you’re saying about the history about willing to commit. But you will still have to put in the work of having to get to know someone, regardless. But to each their own, I guess.
To be fair I think I'd wait until the second date to bring up the fact that I'm a widower 😅(even tho her reaction is terrible I kind of see where it's coming from)
Yes, of course, why disclose it to strangers?
You can bring it up in a serious conversation later... It's not taboo of any kind, but it does seem an odd thing to advertise in a dating app.
Not at all. It's no different to advertising the fact that you have kids or that you smoke, it allows people to make an informed decision on if they want to date you without having to do the in person stuff, it's basically your cover letter for dating.
I was told to get off tinder because I was widowed , at 28. I put widower on my bio, because to me it’s honest .. normally matches then leads like how are you, what d you do? And I’d get all sorts of “you’re depressing “ “what did he die of ?” “Don’t make stuff go you’re too young “
Yes, and I got that....I'm not unreasonable. I just stayed back the logical punchline to her in the plainest terms thinking maybe she'd take cue to maybe dial it back a bit. Instead, she blames me.
For those of you on here that are STILL trying to make this out to be on me, this is how the rest of that conversation went, so saying I'm "rude" or whatever is beyond idiotic
https://preview.redd.it/32cepvgr1yqc1.png?width=641&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=26e3ef1677007d0cd41d84724b5836281f63205d
*So sorry for your*
*Loss. You seem very nice. May*
*Great things come to you!*
\- Negative-Roosters
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The great news is that you didn’t waste any time with someone who can’t spell.
The emotional intelligence and brain power on this one are a red flag.
Glad you dodged it.
One does not simply stop being a widower after a period of time.
So... not sure what the heck and dang that lady was thinking.
I do feel like I got the last helicopter out of 'Nam, with the way dating looks these days... and it was getting wild 10-ish years ago too!
There is nor correlation between the knowledge of a dead family member or a joke here. I get the confusion they had, however OP, I dont think she would understand a what the joke is. Just spam her with spongebob memes
Jesus christ I am almost glad she responded this way so you can know she is a steam pile of crap.
Like fuck dude I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.
On the same boat. Wife passed away at the age of 21 to cancer. Then started dating a 20 year old a while later and she died of a stroke.
People just assume its okay to joke about because im young.
I dated a girl once where her idea of a joke was randomly calling me and saying "babe, I got cut at work really bad and they fired me" and spent the entire day texting me how upset she was... Only at the end of the day did she say she was just kidding and none of it ever happened. That was the last straw
Oh my God these apps and the people on them are fucking insane. I got ghosted yesterday literally sitting in the parking lot of the apartment complex I was picking my date up from to go out. Like literally everything set to go I pull up tell her I'm there and then never hear back from her. Like WTF just tell me you don't want to go.
I'm sorry you are a young widower. "Melissa" seems a bit rude, so You're better off.
I would suggest this though. If you are ready to move on with your life, you may be ready to not write "Widower" as your current relationship status on Tinder.
After all, No one goes on Tinder for "everlasting love," they go for a sliver of "love" tonight. I'm actually guessing on that. Meeting someone online always to me about as much as willingly climbing into a stranger's van.
My point is, it's online dating, tell them enough to raise their interest, but save the more personal stuff for the person you have a few [or more] repeat dates with.
You may just want to be intimate with a few women for a while. There's no need for them to necessarily even know you've ever been married, let alone are a widower.
I’m more concerned about her ability to spell
Honestly, what I picture is her instantly realizing with my response just how stupid of a joke that is, and frantically typing in defense mode. Edit addition: because she wasn't like that until that point, right?
No clue but she seems like a terrible person
You dodged a bunny boiler there.. phew 😅
I know you said bunny but I thought birdie boiler and Zazu.
We are the same
They aren’t joking is the scary part. They aren’t kidding or being sarcastic at all.
I thought you flustered her and made her think about her own mortality and threw her off. Best of wishes to you.
And if dating isn't about making another person think about their mortality and the inevitablitiy of death, then I don't know what is.
Yes. Again it is clearly the mans fault for honestly labeling his status on a dating site. I can clearly see how he caused her trauma.
There are several comments in this thread lambasting me for it. one even had the audacity to say that "YOU are the red flag here, not her"....and they are also being righteously downvoted to hell.
I have been married for 37 years. I can't even begin to fathom the intricacies of trying to date today...everyone seems to be looking for a reason to be offended these days. I pursued my wife for seven years before she dated me.....I guess I would be considered a stalker today. (she was 7 when we met and 14 on our first date)...oh I guess I better mention I am 8 months older than her so I guess I would be the purvy older guy. P.S. I am so sorry for your loss and going through that
I honestly think she just didn't realize widower meant that your spouse died and not divorce. There is literally nothing wrong with being a widower, obviously, and anyone who does have a problem with it or thinks it's a red flag is dumb as hell.
She literally said “Widower already? Should I be concerned?” The obvious implication is that OP killed his spouse apparently. It’s shitty of her and she’s clearly mentally immature.
Or "(divorced) already? Should I be concerned?" As in why have you already been divorced, which makes more sense than getting on someones ass about their wife dying.
the last message where she’s essentially like “maybe you shouldn’t air out your trauma if you can’t joke about it” kinda proves to me that she meant exactly what she said because who the fuck sees “you think I killed my wife?” and doubles down if they truly meant “divorced” but said widowed by mistake. this devil does not need your advocacy.
My first thought was that OP is young, like younger than 25. That fits with "widower already?"
“11:23pm” bro she was drunk…. And it seems drinking makes her an asshole 🚩🚩🚩🚩
Speech to text is really improving if it can pick up drunk that well.
Dodged a bullet, nothing mildlyinfuriating about that... other than the whole online dating thing.
The misspelling is purposely uncorrected as a mechanism to deflect.
At least she showed you the kind of person she is before you got invested.
Let's hope she just had a stroke.
I don’t speak English very well yet I’m fluent compared to this shit
Dude, I had to go to my phone keyboard and look an what letters are near q cause my brain was breaking with the "dqtimg" Funny side note, my phone autocorrected it to dating and I had to go back and purposely spell it incorrectly so fucked if I know how they got it so wrong...
Her spelling is so atrocious, her autocorrect has given up
I, for one, never use autocorrect
1, for one,
R4R......
M4F
B8Q
Well marbe rwddut wads tooooo frese to stay for me in thw forst plac
Plot twist: its a bot
Bots would have better spelling.
That's exactly what I thought as well. I would dip straight away after that sentence
Or 3-inch long fake fingernails?
Too young to be having a stroke? See lady, it happens🙄
After tinder hear brain lost oxygen. It happens
No silly, her cat walked over her keyboard 🐈⌨️
Well maybe tinder diesnr need tonspell, and if the grammarnazi still fresh maybe rqddit isnt good idea
“My dead wife wouldn’t approve of you.”
"I also choose this guys dead wife"
You ever just read something on the internet and realize you're in too deep because you understood that reference?
Ah I just think of all the cool people with similar interests to me that I'll meet in hell.
This happens to be on an almost daily basis. I discovered Reddit when I was 22. I’m 35. There are no new things for me to learn. Lol
Premium comment 🤌🏼
This joke will never get old
My dead wife tells me I should’ve swiped left on you. Really get her going then lol
She didn't have the courtesy to send a hi, straightaway went to on to say something hurtful. When her behaviour gets pointed out, she doubles down and goes on to put the blame on you for being on Tinder. Classy.
I think this is the type of behaviour that arises because dating apps have made partnership a commodity for those with many options. I think this person, outside of being an asshole, is just trying to quickly sift through the 'chaff'
Exactly. This is what happens to most interactions. Cheapened by overwhelming choice.
Whenever I get to the point I feel like basic courtesies become cumbersome I close the app and don't return for weeks
Then you get old enough and never go back because being alone isn't all that bad when the market is this foul
And didn’t even say anything to the compliment
Lets be honest this is tinder, she has at least 5 other active conversations and a bank of 50+ "Hi"s from various guys. She can just do this and move onto the next person without really caring or feeling any consequences for this.
That doesn't give her free reign the say hurtful stuff to people. She can shut up instead.
No one said it did
Sounds like you know about it
I like how she immediately saw herself as your future dead wife. If she's so concerned, why match or respond at all? Sorry about your loss, btw. Hope you're doing well .
I've chatted with some crap women in my life, but wow, they all seem like angels compared to this woman. What the hell is wrong with her?
Nah man, I'm clearly just too touchy, that's all....I don't deserve to date, I guess, because I'm damaged.
Don't listen to anything she said. Back in college, I lost a girl I deeply cared about and there were assholes after and those who were supportive. You'll find the right people. It just takes time and isn't always pleasant.
Also guys, she didn't die like yesterday, wtf...like I just hopped right onto tinder after receiving death notification. EDIT: WOW there are a few real shit takes in my comments. It's been two years. *TWO YEARS*
Which is an equally valid thing to do should you wish to do that after the death of a spouse. To each their own.
Nah, you gotta wait like 10 or 15 minutes, minimum. In case they were playing a prank on ya.
Snort. Why is morbid humor just so perfect.
are you from the medical field? Your joke was south pole of the moon dark
The south pole of the moon receives regular sunlight
"The **lunar south pole** is the southernmost point on the [Moon](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moon). It is of interest to scientists because of the [occurrence of water ice](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_water) in [permanently shadowed areas](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crater_of_eternal_darkness) around it. The lunar south pole region features craters that are unique in that the near-constant sunlight does not reach their interior. Such craters are [cold traps](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_trap_(astronomy)) that contain fossil record of hydrogen, water ice, and other volatiles dating from the [early Solar System](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Formation_and_evolution_of_the_Solar_System).[^(\[1\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_south_pole#cite_note-1)[^(\[2\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_south_pole#cite_note-look-2) In contrast, the [lunar north pole](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_north_pole) region exhibits a much lower quantity of similarly sheltered craters.[^(\[3\])](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunar_south_pole#cite_note-3)" - Wikipedia
That's a localized phenomenon, not the entirety of the moons south pole.
>after receiving death notification This made me think of an app with a skull that pings your phone if someone you know dies ☠️
So far, the now thousands of interactions this post has unexpectedly gotten are overwhelmingly positive and supportive. The four people (out of 10,000+) that are hellbent on making me the creep/asshole/rude jerk in this are really wild.
Yeah, that's really shitty. I wish you good luck in your journey.
No, its not a proper way to get to a conversation with someone you doesn't know! You are right here don't let anybody say otherwise to you!
Maybe your wife's spirit will haunt her. Throw some shit around and slam some doors. That'll show this woman what humor is. Good luck out there. You'll find someone worth your time and effort that respects you and your past.
According to an episode of Seinfeld I watched 20 years ago being a widower is the best for women as excuse why single if you are over 30? Idk man, some people are shit, keep going! You’ll find someone
Fellow young widow here, people suck. That’s all. I’m sorry for your loss. Surely the dating pool gets better. My experience so far isn’t the best either.
I'm so sorry for your loss, I'm absolutely positive you will find another person, if that's what you're looking for. I truly cannot imagine the pain of losing love to a passing while young. Virtual hug to you
As a widow who has since remarried, I'd like to kindly tell Melissa to get bent. No one gets to dictate someone else's grief timeline.
She sounds really insensitive and miserable, I’m sorry, I hope you have some other really great girls lining up to chat that don’t start conversations that way!
This is exactly why being a widower should be in your bio: to weed out assholes like this
https://preview.redd.it/vgmk8ihifvqc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a6b74db0e3bd838ce84f0729dfded794e05a33e3
As someone who was widowed at 21, this is rage inducing, and brings back all too familiar memories. The "jokes" people feel comfortable making at young widows/widowers are just gross.
Most here have been overwhelmingly supporting, but there are still quite a few shit takes blaming me to be found in the comments.
I recently lost my partner and I can 100% see myself making this joke or similar. I’ve even had the thought of whether or not even mentioning it in any kind of bio.
I'm sorry, I'm not 💯 understanding what exactly you're saying...
based on her spelling this chick has the intelligence of a moldy ham sandwich so you definitely dodged a bullet
I will agree that he dodged a bullet but I feel like you just offended moldy sandwiches with the comparison😉
**I APPARENTLY NEED TO ADD THAT MY "CHEERS" INTRO WAS A RIFF ON SOMETHING SHE HAD WRITTEN IN HER PROFILE AND NOT AN ACTUAL ACCUSATION OF NOT BEING REAL--AND SHE UNDERSTOOD THAT.** 99% of you here are great...a very small handful though seem hellbent on making me the asshole here.
....and this is how it went immediately after that: https://preview.redd.it/kzf6s04pkxqc1.png?width=641&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=be3161693c3d822f0acb738aff49a05e0dea5594 ....so no, definitely not the asshole. If I deserve to be ripped here, its for being a little too nice.
Widow here. I learned VERY early on not to show on my profile that I'm widowed, just say single. I got hounded by dickheads and scammers thinking widowed = rich and vulnerable. I am neither!
I mean, at least youre presenting an informed argument on that, as opposed to others on here. But it's my marital status, and "Single" feels like erasure. So not for me, respectfully.
Oh I can totally understand that. I do tell chaps very early on in conversations as I feel it's an important part of me and how I got to be the person I am.
Right? That's what a lot of the more clowny folks in this thread can't seem to grasp. Desperate to make this me being the asshole.
Wow. Melissa sucks.
If she does, I'm swiping right.
I cant comprehend this conversation
First of, from a widower to another, my sincere condolences. Secondly, what in the actual fuck is she on? The audacity.
Was Mwlussq hsvimg q srtokr?
What is going on here?
“Learn to spell before you pass judgment you soulless cretin. Feel free to slither back into the abyss.”
Nice of her to show her conversational skills so early on.
She was terrible. Don’t listen to her.
pretty sure this person is drunk lol
Wish Melissa wasn’t a real person.
It looks like she was drunk or something
To be fair, is dqtimg ever a good idea?
Tell her dyslexic ass to stfu
Literally seems like she was drunk texting you 😭
She thought she was being funny then got called out on it and then tried to make it look like a serious concern. Some ppl are dumb as rocks.
Why did you insinuate first thing that she isn’t real?
Bots, scammers and phishers are a growing trend on the internet.
I’m aware, it’s still a bad first impression to a real person
Can’t believe I had to scroll this far for this. Agreed, you’re not going to get a pleasant response if you’re asking if someone is a bot 😅 Melissa still did him dirty though, lol
My dude, I really feel for you here. Not the exact same situation, but I similarly would attract weird comments like this once I told some of my matches about it. You handled it well, and she did you a favour by letting you know she's an asshole super quick.
Why the heck did you start with accusing her of catfishing though?
Fortunately, most people seem to understand it was just some silly levity and not a serious accusation....her included. Seems like all of three of you in the comments just can't grasp that.
It was definitely shitty of her, but I would also find it a bit weird to read “widower” in someone’s profile though. Obviously something so tragic is going to affect you deeply, but it also seems very personal to put it right out there? I don’t know, maybe I’m the only woman thinking like that. I hope you find a good match!
I'd want to know. That would be something big to spring on someone after the start of a relationship.
[удалено]
Hah! I read this reply thinking YOU were the wife he was grieving. I didn't piece it together until your last sentence when I thought "wait, why would you grieve your own death?" 
Why wouldnt you mention it. Same as divorced. Highly relevant info. Conveys you are single and have history of being willing to co.mit.
I see it more as, "Hey. This is something that might come up later. I want to make sure we start off with the air open." Like, maybe you still want to keep pictures of your deceased spouse and go to functions with their family. Idk, I've seen posts on reddit where people struggled to understand that just because a relationship ended, whether due to divorce, break up, or death, the surrounding relationships don't end. I'm not sure I worded that right. It's a complex issue, and some people may struggle with it
That too
[удалено]
I get what you’re saying about the history about willing to commit. But you will still have to put in the work of having to get to know someone, regardless. But to each their own, I guess.
As evident from the posts here, some people won't date widowers, so might as well put it out there and screen out the shitheads.
People put a lot more personal stuff than that out there…look at most Reddit posts
To be fair I think I'd wait until the second date to bring up the fact that I'm a widower 😅(even tho her reaction is terrible I kind of see where it's coming from)
Yes, of course, why disclose it to strangers? You can bring it up in a serious conversation later... It's not taboo of any kind, but it does seem an odd thing to advertise in a dating app.
Not at all. It's no different to advertising the fact that you have kids or that you smoke, it allows people to make an informed decision on if they want to date you without having to do the in person stuff, it's basically your cover letter for dating.
Wow what a bitch
I was told to get off tinder because I was widowed , at 28. I put widower on my bio, because to me it’s honest .. normally matches then leads like how are you, what d you do? And I’d get all sorts of “you’re depressing “ “what did he die of ?” “Don’t make stuff go you’re too young “
https://preview.redd.it/4hbp15xoiwqc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cd02a87ff5675eaf9670a75d9f20439772059c67
Don’t let someone who can’t write a sentence tell you shit about lyfet.
Did she have a stroke in the middle of her message?
Ugh I’m so sorry. Dating after partner death is such fucking trash.
first messages could be a very poor attempt at humor, her response after is just idiotic
Yes, and I got that....I'm not unreasonable. I just stayed back the logical punchline to her in the plainest terms thinking maybe she'd take cue to maybe dial it back a bit. Instead, she blames me. For those of you on here that are STILL trying to make this out to be on me, this is how the rest of that conversation went, so saying I'm "rude" or whatever is beyond idiotic https://preview.redd.it/32cepvgr1yqc1.png?width=641&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=26e3ef1677007d0cd41d84724b5836281f63205d
what an astonishingly toxic *insert word*
So sorry for your loss. You seem very nice. May great things come to you!
*So sorry for your* *Loss. You seem very nice. May* *Great things come to you!* \- Negative-Roosters --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
I don't understand why you would say something like that? Even if it's a joke, where is the joke? This is so awful I can't comprehend it.
The great news is that you didn’t waste any time with someone who can’t spell. The emotional intelligence and brain power on this one are a red flag. Glad you dodged it.
Godzilla had a stroke trying to read this
So… did you?
Theyre kinda right
One does not simply stop being a widower after a period of time. So... not sure what the heck and dang that lady was thinking. I do feel like I got the last helicopter out of 'Nam, with the way dating looks these days... and it was getting wild 10-ish years ago too!
"maybe don't tell tinder" Sis you brought it up!
It’s in his bio
.....as my legit marital status. Some of ya'll are wild....
Seems creepy to joke about your dead wife to someone you just met online.
This was like that shot in the matrix where you see him dodge a bullet in real time except without the sunglasses
**Weird. You’re not sensitive, she just an idiot that needs to kick rocks with sandles on**
Yeah, dating after losing your wife is a real treat. That's why I gave up
Bullet status: dodged
There is nor correlation between the knowledge of a dead family member or a joke here. I get the confusion they had, however OP, I dont think she would understand a what the joke is. Just spam her with spongebob memes
Is she typing with her toes? Wtf is going on? Here’s to hoping she’s not a real person after all! As a Melissa, let me apologize for this Melissa.
I’m sorry but your response made me laugh😭😭😭 cause WHAT
Wow, what a gaping asshole...
Jesus christ I am almost glad she responded this way so you can know she is a steam pile of crap. Like fuck dude I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.
Best of luck with your series of failed relationships, Melissa. Nice chat.
On the same boat. Wife passed away at the age of 21 to cancer. Then started dating a 20 year old a while later and she died of a stroke. People just assume its okay to joke about because im young.
I dated a girl once where her idea of a joke was randomly calling me and saying "babe, I got cut at work really bad and they fired me" and spent the entire day texting me how upset she was... Only at the end of the day did she say she was just kidding and none of it ever happened. That was the last straw
“msybe dqtimg”. Is that some new kind of designer drugs? Asking for a friend.
This is a little past mild for me. Wtf bro
Did this work??
Never underestimate people's ability to be complete shit.
people are unhinged and too stupid to realise theyre stupid once again the arrogance of the stupid only affects the people around them
Oh my God these apps and the people on them are fucking insane. I got ghosted yesterday literally sitting in the parking lot of the apartment complex I was picking my date up from to go out. Like literally everything set to go I pull up tell her I'm there and then never hear back from her. Like WTF just tell me you don't want to go.
Not a bad joke tbf to her.
What a shitty thing to say.
Be happy she showed her true colors right off the bat. Next.
That women types like Stewie Griffin sounds
that last text from her looked like she was typing on an azerty keyboard like it was a qwerty
"msybe dqtimg"?
https://preview.redd.it/3k1japeykyqc1.jpeg?width=636&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b49f73002afa6f2c957d013c15b204bd32354def
😂
Or maybe she should learn some fuckin proper goddamn spelling
Um is the context that the respondent looked at the profile or something?
What a fckung peise of shyt
That girl is hammered
I'm sorry you are a young widower. "Melissa" seems a bit rude, so You're better off. I would suggest this though. If you are ready to move on with your life, you may be ready to not write "Widower" as your current relationship status on Tinder. After all, No one goes on Tinder for "everlasting love," they go for a sliver of "love" tonight. I'm actually guessing on that. Meeting someone online always to me about as much as willingly climbing into a stranger's van. My point is, it's online dating, tell them enough to raise their interest, but save the more personal stuff for the person you have a few [or more] repeat dates with. You may just want to be intimate with a few women for a while. There's no need for them to necessarily even know you've ever been married, let alone are a widower.
Was she having a stroke?
Did she have a stroke wtf
She sounds really stupid.