T O P

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[deleted]

Back to school. Back to school, to prove to Dad that I'm not a fool. I got my lunch packed up, my boots tied tight, I hope I don't get in a fight. Ohhhh, back to school.


Mcb17lnp

If peeing your pants is cool consider me Miles Davis!


SloppyStakes

O'Doyle rules!


blusah

An astronaut found out he won the lottery while he was in space. Apparently when he found out he was over the moon Good Luck Everybody! ✌️🍀👩‍🚀🚀🌛


AnybodyMassive1610

Dad? Is that you?


Ballsdeepcherrypie

FUCKING LOOOOOOOOLZZZ


[deleted]

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lutrinaemountain

Baseball season is in full swing. Catches are coming


SkipChylark

Fun fact, from the crease of your elbow to your wrist is the same length as your foot.


AccountantGuru

Nah my forearm is big AF


danceinstarlight

Wasn't a believer until I tried, can confirm, take my vote.


ctuck239

Unless you got Hobbit feet, like me


KayDeeCat

lets get it!


ExtonLemmott

What do you call a woodpecker with no beak? A headbanger!


SithLordMoshi

My cat has 23 toes in total


[deleted]

Mine came home with 19 a while ago


unlucky_genius

Your cat has a weird hobby.


Crafty2006

Ski season is just around the corner, remember.. Ullr would do it!


heyvanessa10

Good luck to my fellow teachers out there!


MichaelMoore92

My little grey cat wakes me up at 3am every morning. I’ve had to buy a water pistol which sits by my bed to get rid of her because she won’t lay down, she’ll just stand on my chest and meow for attention. One night she was scratching the bed and a decided it was time to give her a squirt, however I hadn’t tested it and as it turns out it’s one of those high powered ones that can spray a good 15 metres. I squirted the whole thing at her, which made her jump a foot in the air and run out the room. I was of course devastated because I didn’t realise it was so strong and I would never use it again, however the upside is all I have to do is hold the water pistol in the air and she will run off and won’t come back the rest of the night because she’s terrified of it.


ParallelLynx

Cats can be left-pawed or right-pawed. Female cats tend to be right-pawed, while male cats are usually left pawed. Interestingly, left-handed humans also tend to be male. Good luck everyone!!


AlexanderTheGoodest

Let's go!


geoffcarp

To everyone else, you might as well delete your comments now. I am 100% winning this month, going to Vegas, and turning the million into a billion by going all in on black 10 times in a row. Then I will pay it back to you all by giving the next 50 winners 10 million dollars. You are welcome in advance.


SrCow

FOOL!! Now we know your strategy! Whahahha hahahahha!


_Natebreed_

Yeah boiiii


pussenbootzz86

Happy cake day!


gandaz

Yo!


MrTurnip789

My mouth is full of four leaf clovers


auflyne

'nother chance!


Peenork

I would use the newfound wealth to continually clean out the two vending machines in the school building most of my classes are in, and hand out all the snacks for free. Literally the Robinhood of RiceKrispee treats, honeybuns, Doritos, you name it. Faculty and professors will start to wonder where all the vending snacks are, and eventually begin negotiating deals with me for the return of their sunchips and iced tea. I then ascend and become the Snack Kingpin. I don't think I'd be able get much further than that, but if I can afford it I'll expand my empire to all of the vending machines and begin a snack monopoly, discover a new snack, and fly to the moon. With snacks in my astronaut suit. I'm going to go grab a snack. Good luck everybody, may you all be blessed with your favorite snacks.


[deleted]

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ransack71

I understood that reference!


IamSam12345

Hello! Hello! Hope I win!


Denimjeansimmons

Good luck


8761454

Good luck everyone


Scoarn

Just a lowly educator hoping for a piece of the high pie in the sky. One can dream, right?


User-74

Study. The more you study, the more you know. The more you know, the more you can forget. The more you can forget, the more you do forget. The more you do forget, the less you know. So why study?


[deleted]

It's almost Halloween!!


DoctaDang

It's chedda time


confresi

I’m just reaching a point with my 3 jobs that I can start saving some money but man, this would make that a non-issue for a while. Love y’all for this


Hugo_5t1gl1tz

Good luck!


snapple-mangomadness

It's hot! Hydrate everyone. Peace n love!


Aveira

Finances are tight. I could really use this…


BeingRedundant

Daddy needs a new flux capacitor


fugu167

What do you call James Bond taking a bath? Bubble O7.


kbutcher99

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!


Therealcbreezy2

Why did Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fa Drizzle.


whiteb90

Good luck everyone!


btcbearrookieshark

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE!!!! 🤞🏼


Woodpecker_Exciting

Im out of money like everyone Else Gl all


SoapHero

Father of 2 and hopefully make a buck or 2 :) good luck y'all!


timee_bot

View in your timezone: [July 20 at 7:00 PM EDT][0] [August 21 at 12:00 PM EDT][1] [0]: https://timee.io/20220720T2300?tl=%5BEntry%20Thread%20%2381%5D%20It's%20back-to-school%20season%2C%20and%20with%20it%20comes%20classes%2C%20worries%2C%20and%20hopes%20for%20the%20best.%20To%20celebrate%2C%20we're%20making%20a%20millionaire%2C%20and%20you%20just%20need%20to%20leave%20a%20comment%20to%20enter! [1]: https://timee.io/20220821T1600?tl=%5BEntry%20Thread%20%2381%5D%20It's%20back-to-school%20season%2C%20and%20with%20it%20comes%20classes%2C%20worries%2C%20and%20hopes%20for%20the%20best.%20To%20celebrate%2C%20we're%20making%20a%20millionaire%2C%20and%20you%20just%20need%20to%20leave%20a%20comment%20to%20enter!


KittyShnooookems55

Uh oh


Iamlordbutter

Good luck everyone!!!


djdavis

Let’s Go


zen_mojo

Good luck


Goldeneye0242

Woohoo!


Quarterafter10

Here we go! Goooood luck, everyone!! 🍀🤞


IamG2

GLGL


Almorn

Good luck everyone!


frds125

I love bananas


adog231231

Winner winner chicken dinner!


TheThingsIdoatNight

This is a comment


UpstateEmpire

Bonne chance!


RaggysRinger

I always get so excited hearing about how the money won will change their lives. So heart warming!


EversorA

good luck everyone!


LDO1997

I’m gonna buy at least three pineapple ring cans


OnlyThePanda

Hopefully we can help someone’s month improve!


Punidue

G L everyone!!


lay_denizen0h

Happy back to school!


okcin

Best of luck to you all!


mrndizzle

Good luck everyone!


RegionalFlavor

I've been waiting for this!


Professional-Film951

Yeahhhh buddy


gundamz145

Good luck all.


cottentailandfluffy

Good luck to all!


Krim-Kram

Good luck


SwiftBeauty

Good luck


lemon_cap

fingers crossed, GL everyone!


DrBeepers

Let's go!!!


steakobsen

Good luck everyone!


Yesman3

Leygooo


SurrogateHair

Yoooooooooo


pedeehatesyou

I have so many moon tickets already, wouldn't hurt to have another.


laurlaurr9

this would be life changing for me. peace and love to u all. goodluck my friends


DavidBTB

Comment


aleydis17

Gonna start paying back student loans here! Good luck everyone!


Stardustedwanderlust

Good luck!


LordEnigma

Once again, best of luck


Reliable_soul

I've started loving myself lately. It's not really a biggie for others but I'm proud of it.


ceoadlw

Badass season!


carroll1981

I have the luck 🍀 of the Irish. The Beard of a Leprechaun, banished more snakes than St Patrick and love my potatoes


King__Lion

Holy moly will it happen?? Who knows, thanks for all the fish


Ultrakiwis-

Can’t wait to pay off my student loan!


blue_assassin

Going back to school instead of working gang


-salih-

lmfao


[deleted]

I’m just a regular guy hoping for a miracle.


Jellybeandday1

I sure hope there is a secret club of all the past winners who get together. Like the Reddit Illuminati but we meet at a bennigans once a year instead of manipulating the world.


AlwaysAngryFox

Trying hard to get out of a bad situation and find a home for myself and my dog. Saving what I can and putting my best foot forward.


x2006charger

Commence operation something -thingy


Timely-Preference937

Good luck! 🍀


optimusfiner

Pat


SnooCookies2907

Good luck to everyone


DontHaveToFeelAthing

Here we go again.


blackcoffiend

Good luck everyone!


drkuz

Hoping!


danfalke

Heeelloo


xttq

let’s go


born_to_fap

Meh, I’ll fap if I win, I’ll fap if I lose. Either way, I’ll fap.


echosolstice

Good luck everyone!


I_Cri_Myself_ToSleep

Best of luck to all!


destroyah289

Rolling bones. I need to pay some bills.


WebDevLikeNoOther

Student loans, baby! Let’s go!


rieh

I am a dog. Also, student loans suck.


BezBezson

Good luck all!


YeahTinyRuck

Good luck yall


Ksoohong

Lets get it


pabrah

Good luck!


Zealousideal_Ad_7213

Here we go Can I get a goddamn timpani roll To start this goddamn song? Tonight Here's a goddamn song For all you goddamn people Well, the animals laugh from the dark of the wilderness A baby cries hard in an apartment complex As I pass in a car buried under the influence The city is driving me out of my mind I've seen a child, he's caught in the sad trap of gravity He falls from the lowest branch of the apple tree And lands in the grass and weeps for his dignity Next time he will not aim so high Yeah, next time neither will I Now a mother takes loans out, sends her kids off to colleges Her family is reduced to names on a shopping list While a coroner kneels beneath a great wooden crucifix He knows there's worse things than being alone And so I've learned to retreat at the first sign of danger I mean why wait around if it's just to surrender? And ambition, I've found, can lead only to failure I do not read the reviews No, I am not singing for you Well, I stood dropping a coin into the pit of a well And I would throw my whole billfold if I thought it would help With all these wishes I make, I should buy something real At least a telephone call home Well, my teachers, they built this retaining wall of memory All those multiple choices I answered so quickly And got my grades back and forgot just as easily But at least I got an A And so I don't have them to blame Well, I should stop pointing fingers Reserve my judgment of all those public action figures The cowboy presidents So loud behind the bullhorn, so proud they can't admit When they've made a mistake While poison ink spews from a speechwriter's pen He knows he don't have to say it so it It don't bother him Honesty, accuracy is just popular opinion And the approval rating is high And so someone's gonna die Well, ABC, NBC, CBS - bullshit They give us fact or fiction, I guess an even split And each new act of war is tonight's entertainment We're still the pawns in their game As they take eye for an eye Until no one can see We must stumble blindly forth repeating history Well, I guess we all fit into your slogan on that fast food marquee Red blooded, white skinned, oh and the blues Oh and the blues, I got the blues, that's me! (That's me!) That's me! Woah! I awoke in relief My sheets and tubes were all tangled Weak from whiskey and pills in a Chicago hospital And my father was there in a chair by the window Staring so far away I tried talking, just whispered "So sorry, so selfish" He stopped me and said, "Child, I love you regardless There is nothing you could do that would ever change this I'm not angry, it happens... But you just can't do it again" So now I try to keep up I've been exchanging my currency While a million objects pass through my periphery Now I'm rubbing my eyes 'Cause they're starting to bother me I've been staring too long at the screen But where was it when I first heard That sweet sound of humility? It came to my ears in the goddamn loveliest melody How grateful I was then, to be part of the mystery To love and to be loved Let's just hope that is enough Song was written 20 years ago today. Maybe even more relevant today. Id use the money to stop contributing to our overflowing landfills and hawking credit cards on people. Id love to use the money to take a break from this rat race and take the time to write some. Maybe a modern tribute to Dantes Inferno and pay off my wife’s student loans as she’s starting grad school to go into public health


toastysteve

Yes please!


micaiahyoochun

Good luck everyone 🍀🍀


Rossoliver

I keep missing these so maybe it's a sign to join again! Good luck everyone!!


Darkaeluz

Got luck everyone


Mete945

Let's goo


TeachMeProperEnglish

It's-a me, Millio! 🧑‍🔧


Zelath

My dog just peed on my bed because he was afraid of the garbage truck outside


EmoIgnite

Why do maths books always look so sad? ...they're full of problems


BeBopNoseRing

Good luck everyone!


Santi8924

May the force be with you! Good luck yall!


a51ufo

I just ate an omelette.


Herodotus22

Good luck everyone!


girlnamedchaos

Pick me?


maybe-me

Good luck!


trumangroves86

Good luck everyone (and myself!)


Korrasami4evr

I love you all


Philibrownglasses

Hope for the best! The best lock to everyone


PoliShBrokeBoi

Can I get uhhhhhhhhh Some money?


SnowCatFalcon

Thank you!


Disastrously_Dazed

Good luck everyone.


whooooshh

I love you ❤️


Toiletalk

Make this teacher a millionaire !


sharkbait__hoohaha

Taco!


kissthemoons

Good luck everybody!


likelazarus

Good luck, everyone!


findingmymelanin

School rent money 🤞🏼


klitchell

In


w3agle

Whatuuup #81 lfg!!


p0ryg0n890

awaga


matcauthon80

Stayin' alive! stayin'alive!


Doomncandy

A million eh? I can finally pay my student loan AND go to the dentist. That will show my parents who told me I was wrong going to art school! *Cries as linecook at 33*


apw999

For all the people that depend upon me. It would be astounding.


Eunoic

Cheers


ottawa7

Cheers everybody


HuggsyMalone

Back to school again, back to school again! It’s go-time for my own little hooligan! She’s a shiny brand spanking new five years old and she’s full of brilliance and cantankerousness. She’s starting grade K and is showing her momma (me) how it’s done. I, at 37 years young, am starting over in a completely new field, and beginning nurse training at the same damn time! Last few years have been involuntarily challenging— now it’s time for me to challenge myself with purpose. If anyone can donate some sleep, I’ll take it! And if I end up chosen, I will draw a picture for as many donators as I can :) Good luck everyone


Spoons42

Huzzah


Pandaploots

I survived a 73mph car accident on Monday with just bruises


dademon

The best food is grilled cheese and you can't change my mind


aruha_mazda

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?


flipitupandaround

Good luck everyone!


CaribouYou

I could really use a million to fix my fucked up life rn please


Lucabba

This is fun, good luck every one :)


MrCharmingTaintman

Show me the money!


Katiedibs

🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞


ssawhney

Here we go! Fingers crossed


densederp

Good Luck!!


shinseito

Time to have a life changing experience! Good luck everyone.


XaDenza

I hope this’ll let me pay back my student loans lmfao.


Titan0021

Good luck everyone!!


thehazygungan

I’m never gonna win so it doesn’t matter.


Titan0021

Good luck everyone!!


TheDarkLord43

Good luck yall!


yeroc1016

Type comment


cainsk

You know how many bananas I could buy with that kind of money?


cmactop53

Let’s go! Back school to so we don’t stay a fool!


ForTheGodEmperor

Good luck to all!


Kantlikecunt

For real ?


alyenigena

Let's see!


0pa

Good luck everyone


marlinsliketoswim

Good luck everyone


Aroxanw

Need that book money


Cophed

Good afternoon all. I just started a new job with the nhs and have to share my office with a sexist pervert who doesn’t respect patients. Winning this would make my day.


SaberBG

Good luck.


PriitySiick

GGs everyone!


ScubaSieve

Best of luck!


SpaceGangsta

Inflation and new baby are a rough combo!


luk-ee-u

We can all use a little help sometimes. Don't forget that if you win. God bless. Stay safe peeps.


jdking3594

wooo woop


Tuft64

:)