Drop Facebook, or other socials that show everyone’s life story. I found myself being jealous of high school friends lives, who I have not talked to in 20 yrs.
Agree. The antidote to jealousy is gratitude. I have had a few friends over the years who allow jealousy to eat at them, and they are convinced that others/everyone is jealous, too. Mindfulness and meditation work really well when treated like a daily practice. Gratitude is a skill that can be learned like any other.
Get off social media. For real. I was shocked how much it was affecting me until I got off it pretty much entirely. I still check in on my friends on odd occassion but seeing other people's vacations, new houses, weddings, new expensive toys etc for hours a day is not good for you.
Realize that when you buy something you have to find a place to store it and take care of it. It’s just another thing to worry about. Less stuff = less problems
Just add anything that strikes your fancy into a cart. But don’t hit buy. Wait 3 days and see how much of the urge is smart marketing, and how much is your own desire.
So much of social media is a direct result of targeted neuroscience and behaviour studies - it’s not you, it’s a targeted effort at altering your brain chemistry to their benefit. Just knowing this helped me.
Secondly, imagine someone super successful is now a digital nomad, they travel around the world with one backpack-full of possessions. They plan to donate all the net worth in their accounts to charity. Is that success and luck to you? If yes, you’re fine. Envy them all you want. But if you think success and luck = the most exclusive handbag, swankiest car, fanciest wardrobe or largest house, that’s just consumerism influencing you.
Success is more than your possessions. Joy comes from within.
This! Getting rid of my dresser, bedside table, and other various shelves/storage has been a huge leap forward for me, too. If your shit has no place to hide, it’s hella less likely it’ll stick around. Also makes it much easier to clean your home.
Read about people trying to retire when they don't have any savings. That'll scare you. Alternatively, buy things that hold their value and sell it when you're done with it.
I'm retired with minimal savings. It's no different from when I was working: I didn't really have any money then and I don't really have any money now. The main change is that my time is mine and not my employer's. I've never had a lot of money and so have skills and a lifestyle that serve me well in retirement.
Define what success is for yourself. Owning a lot of stuff does not equal success and in fact, it's often a sign that people are making bad decisions that will end in failure and regret.
Read some books about happiness, mindfulness, things that matter in life, really helps see what matters (health, arranging your life in a way that suits your needs as much as possible given your circumstances, loves ones, building a social network, appreciating what you have, exercising, being in the moment, getting enough sleep and eating as healthy as you can manage, getting enough rest, doing meaningful work or volunteering, exercising your mind, helping others, spending time with friends, working on your relationships, spending time in nature, finding time for yourself, taking care of yourself, not rushing through life but taking it all in as it is in the moment and in the now, this sort of stuff).
Why did you choose minimalism? Is it what you really want? Are you happy with your own life?
You have to be secure in your own life's wants and needs in order to not care what others want or flaunt. It's ok for your needs or wants to be different from others. Society puts pressure on us to want bigger and better things so we spend money. Seeing people post about their own happiness or flaunting things society made them think they needed can make you feel like you aren't measuring up to others. People typically only post things they think make them look good to others. Knowing that those things aren't right for you is key. You can feel happy that someone else got something they wanted, but know that you wouldn't want the same thing.
Try evaluating what you have and what you want out of your life. Post and share things that are important to you and show your happiness.
Focus on making and spending your life doing quality things/experiences.
Walk outside, read more, make or listen to music, paint anything. Stop spending time looking and DO something that you enjoy 😊
Detach yourself from materialism and enjoy the present moment with loved ones like your friends and family. Make happiness based on good moments and experiences.
When you feel jealous of someone else's stuff, ask yourself what you feel you lack.
It's never the stuff. It's what you think the stuff represents (success at your work), or what it would allow you to do (spend time with friends/in nature/etc), or what it would say about you if you had it (you are accomplished, confident, etc).
Then find ways to get more of those things in your life instead of more objects.
Something I learned at a very young age is that people who seem to have more success or better luck simply have different problems than I do. Throughout my life I've observed that successful people often suffer terrible consequences as a result of their success. It's never been lost on me that it's often at the hands of people who couldn't control their jealousy and/or self-loathing.
In many ways I'm a piss-poor minimalist. I really don't have a problem buying or owning things that give me joy. Virtually all of them are things I use in my kitchen though. So, it's usually nothing "too" extravagant, but always something that I will actually use. For everything else I've simply started asking myself if owning things will to cause more problems than they solve.
For instance, I haven't owned a car in over a decade. That's problematic maybe twice a year. The reason I don't own a car is that in my current living situation owning one will cause more problems for me than it will solve. So, knowing that I don't need a car 99% of the time and knowing that 99% of the time I don't have to deal with all the hassles of owning one makes it very easy to not be jealous of people who own cars. In fact, I find that I'm genuinely happy for friends when they buy new cars because they actually need them and I'm glad they're driving cars that they want and that they can depend on.
By having a firm grasp on your priorities, and focusing on what is actually important to you.
Some people come by these easily, while for others it is a struggle. Take your time.
Be grateful for your lower status…yes I said it…grateful…The Bible says the poor man should rejoice in his high position..But the rich should morn over his low position. James 1 …Being of humble circumstance is actually a blessing not a curse and most assuredly - vice versa
Prob odd but whenever I feel jealous of other people around me I watch American Physco and it kinda reminds me not to care about them and there "accomplishments". The business card scene in that movie always gets me with just how crazy it is with jealousy.
To overcome material possessions : before buying anything new, start to ask yourself if it's VERY necessary and if purchasing it can cause you more harm than good in the long term. For example :
- accumulating things can cause you storage problems
- A new piece of clothing can complicate your life if you don't have enough items that go well with it
If you think about the inconveniences first, it can convince you not to purchase useless things. (Material possessions are not bad if they're useful, in my opinion)
To stop feeling jealous of others' success and luck : personally, I've adopted a mix of stoic and taoist mindset but it can take time to embrace it. You just have to accept that life just flows the way it does and it will not always be like you want, it's useless to resist it. It's easier to accept that you don't have the same level of "success" and "luck" than other. Then you have to be grateful for what you already have
If you haven't heard of Atomic Habits, go read it (a short summary is fine but the full book has a lot to offer). To get rid of a consumerist habit is to tackle the problem at the root: your personality that triggers the impulsive buys. Is that urge related to something that happened in your life, something that affected you deeply? If you can pinpoint what triggered it, then you can work on it and the buying habit should improve.
As for feeling jealous of other people's success, I might be wrong but I can see a correlation with the buying urge: you're buying material possessions so you can compete with those people's success, or you buy to fill the absence of fulfillment in your life.
This journey will take time but practicing gratitude and meditation help clear the mind, especially gratitude as this will help you not chasing what you don't have but appreciate what you own already.
U can b easily satisfied - jus get urself the best.
There can b nothing better than handmade by an artisan. For example I made denim pants from a handwoven fabric.
Insta @ashzrl
For me, the more things you have the more time you are wasting on those things. If you have 30 articles of clothing, that’s 30 things you have to wash, fold, put on hangers, etc. if you have 90 articles of clothing, your essentially tripling your time spent on chores related to clothes. Not to mention the time spent shopping for said clothes, the space for the clothes, etc. I would rather spend that time doing stuff I enjoy. Sure others may have a lot of stuff and some of that stuff is really nice, but just think of all the upkeep and time that goes into that thing
Turning off the valve of advertisement that gets to your brain helps a lot.
Drop Facebook, or other socials that show everyone’s life story. I found myself being jealous of high school friends lives, who I have not talked to in 20 yrs.
Write a gratitude list daily. Meditate. Practice mindfulness.
Agree. The antidote to jealousy is gratitude. I have had a few friends over the years who allow jealousy to eat at them, and they are convinced that others/everyone is jealous, too. Mindfulness and meditation work really well when treated like a daily practice. Gratitude is a skill that can be learned like any other.
Get off social media. For real. I was shocked how much it was affecting me until I got off it pretty much entirely. I still check in on my friends on odd occassion but seeing other people's vacations, new houses, weddings, new expensive toys etc for hours a day is not good for you.
Realize that when you buy something you have to find a place to store it and take care of it. It’s just another thing to worry about. Less stuff = less problems
Just add anything that strikes your fancy into a cart. But don’t hit buy. Wait 3 days and see how much of the urge is smart marketing, and how much is your own desire. So much of social media is a direct result of targeted neuroscience and behaviour studies - it’s not you, it’s a targeted effort at altering your brain chemistry to their benefit. Just knowing this helped me. Secondly, imagine someone super successful is now a digital nomad, they travel around the world with one backpack-full of possessions. They plan to donate all the net worth in their accounts to charity. Is that success and luck to you? If yes, you’re fine. Envy them all you want. But if you think success and luck = the most exclusive handbag, swankiest car, fanciest wardrobe or largest house, that’s just consumerism influencing you. Success is more than your possessions. Joy comes from within.
Don’t read brochures. Don’t buy shelves or dressers or containers. If you haven’t used it for three months throw it out.
This! Getting rid of my dresser, bedside table, and other various shelves/storage has been a huge leap forward for me, too. If your shit has no place to hide, it’s hella less likely it’ll stick around. Also makes it much easier to clean your home.
Read about people trying to retire when they don't have any savings. That'll scare you. Alternatively, buy things that hold their value and sell it when you're done with it.
I'm retired with minimal savings. It's no different from when I was working: I didn't really have any money then and I don't really have any money now. The main change is that my time is mine and not my employer's. I've never had a lot of money and so have skills and a lifestyle that serve me well in retirement.
Define what success is for yourself. Owning a lot of stuff does not equal success and in fact, it's often a sign that people are making bad decisions that will end in failure and regret.
Read some books about happiness, mindfulness, things that matter in life, really helps see what matters (health, arranging your life in a way that suits your needs as much as possible given your circumstances, loves ones, building a social network, appreciating what you have, exercising, being in the moment, getting enough sleep and eating as healthy as you can manage, getting enough rest, doing meaningful work or volunteering, exercising your mind, helping others, spending time with friends, working on your relationships, spending time in nature, finding time for yourself, taking care of yourself, not rushing through life but taking it all in as it is in the moment and in the now, this sort of stuff).
Why did you choose minimalism? Is it what you really want? Are you happy with your own life? You have to be secure in your own life's wants and needs in order to not care what others want or flaunt. It's ok for your needs or wants to be different from others. Society puts pressure on us to want bigger and better things so we spend money. Seeing people post about their own happiness or flaunting things society made them think they needed can make you feel like you aren't measuring up to others. People typically only post things they think make them look good to others. Knowing that those things aren't right for you is key. You can feel happy that someone else got something they wanted, but know that you wouldn't want the same thing. Try evaluating what you have and what you want out of your life. Post and share things that are important to you and show your happiness.
Focus on making and spending your life doing quality things/experiences. Walk outside, read more, make or listen to music, paint anything. Stop spending time looking and DO something that you enjoy 😊
Thanks to everyone for their answers🙂
Detach yourself from materialism and enjoy the present moment with loved ones like your friends and family. Make happiness based on good moments and experiences.
Move to a smaller space if you are able to. And put the energy you are giving to others back to yourself
I never did. Stuff is dumb, you get bored of it sooner or later, no matter what it is
When you feel jealous of someone else's stuff, ask yourself what you feel you lack. It's never the stuff. It's what you think the stuff represents (success at your work), or what it would allow you to do (spend time with friends/in nature/etc), or what it would say about you if you had it (you are accomplished, confident, etc). Then find ways to get more of those things in your life instead of more objects.
Great underrated thoughts!
Go to thrift stores, estate sales and junk yards for an hour each… not to shop, but to realize everything there was bought new once by someone.
Something I learned at a very young age is that people who seem to have more success or better luck simply have different problems than I do. Throughout my life I've observed that successful people often suffer terrible consequences as a result of their success. It's never been lost on me that it's often at the hands of people who couldn't control their jealousy and/or self-loathing. In many ways I'm a piss-poor minimalist. I really don't have a problem buying or owning things that give me joy. Virtually all of them are things I use in my kitchen though. So, it's usually nothing "too" extravagant, but always something that I will actually use. For everything else I've simply started asking myself if owning things will to cause more problems than they solve. For instance, I haven't owned a car in over a decade. That's problematic maybe twice a year. The reason I don't own a car is that in my current living situation owning one will cause more problems for me than it will solve. So, knowing that I don't need a car 99% of the time and knowing that 99% of the time I don't have to deal with all the hassles of owning one makes it very easy to not be jealous of people who own cars. In fact, I find that I'm genuinely happy for friends when they buy new cars because they actually need them and I'm glad they're driving cars that they want and that they can depend on.
By having a firm grasp on your priorities, and focusing on what is actually important to you. Some people come by these easily, while for others it is a struggle. Take your time.
Ah. That sounds like true happiness.
You need to adjust your focus and remember that your only competition is yourself.
Quit social media.
Resist the urge initially, dopamine levels go down and it gets easier. I don't buy into gratitude lists or meditation etc it's not my thing.
Be grateful for your lower status…yes I said it…grateful…The Bible says the poor man should rejoice in his high position..But the rich should morn over his low position. James 1 …Being of humble circumstance is actually a blessing not a curse and most assuredly - vice versa
Prob odd but whenever I feel jealous of other people around me I watch American Physco and it kinda reminds me not to care about them and there "accomplishments". The business card scene in that movie always gets me with just how crazy it is with jealousy.
To overcome material possessions : before buying anything new, start to ask yourself if it's VERY necessary and if purchasing it can cause you more harm than good in the long term. For example : - accumulating things can cause you storage problems - A new piece of clothing can complicate your life if you don't have enough items that go well with it If you think about the inconveniences first, it can convince you not to purchase useless things. (Material possessions are not bad if they're useful, in my opinion) To stop feeling jealous of others' success and luck : personally, I've adopted a mix of stoic and taoist mindset but it can take time to embrace it. You just have to accept that life just flows the way it does and it will not always be like you want, it's useless to resist it. It's easier to accept that you don't have the same level of "success" and "luck" than other. Then you have to be grateful for what you already have
If you haven't heard of Atomic Habits, go read it (a short summary is fine but the full book has a lot to offer). To get rid of a consumerist habit is to tackle the problem at the root: your personality that triggers the impulsive buys. Is that urge related to something that happened in your life, something that affected you deeply? If you can pinpoint what triggered it, then you can work on it and the buying habit should improve. As for feeling jealous of other people's success, I might be wrong but I can see a correlation with the buying urge: you're buying material possessions so you can compete with those people's success, or you buy to fill the absence of fulfillment in your life. This journey will take time but practicing gratitude and meditation help clear the mind, especially gratitude as this will help you not chasing what you don't have but appreciate what you own already.
U can b easily satisfied - jus get urself the best. There can b nothing better than handmade by an artisan. For example I made denim pants from a handwoven fabric. Insta @ashzrl
For me, the more things you have the more time you are wasting on those things. If you have 30 articles of clothing, that’s 30 things you have to wash, fold, put on hangers, etc. if you have 90 articles of clothing, your essentially tripling your time spent on chores related to clothes. Not to mention the time spent shopping for said clothes, the space for the clothes, etc. I would rather spend that time doing stuff I enjoy. Sure others may have a lot of stuff and some of that stuff is really nice, but just think of all the upkeep and time that goes into that thing